āRemus is better than severus bc he could have been bitter and let the past ruin his life uwuā
Severus was preparing for war since he was around 17. First w V, then with D. When V poofed, D specifically said that they couldnt be sure that V was dead, and they kept preparing for a war they werenāt sure was going to happen. Thats 24/7 hypervigilence and hyperawareness and plans a thru z of failsafes, active defense for 20-ish years while being a full time teacher to an army of civilian puberty machines.
Iām NOT saying lupin had it easy, as a werewolf in a culture that wants him dead. Iām saying that he has been violently domesticated to be obedient and quiet in a perpetual state of fear, living with and depending on the kindness of people who could kill him at any time, ever since sirius lured a child into the shrieking shack while he wasnāt lucid and could have murdered someone and gotten killed executed.
Iām saying that i interpret this chain of events and remusā primary defense for almost 20 years to be meek and submissive and as non-threatening as he can, to avoid being put down.
Iām saying that there is a vast difference in mindset and conditioning, over a period of 20 odd years, between aggressively and quietly preparing to fight and win a war in the shadows, and leading a quiet unassuming civilian life with citizens who can legally murder you at any moment.
Iām saying that severus had to cultivate controlled aggression and ruthlessness, and sacrifice everything at the drop of a hat, and remus had to stomp down every single natural mammalian survival and self-defense instinct. Being territorial or angry or god forbid resentful at being treated like a walking time bomb, that served no purpose.
Remus seems to some like a coward, and itās true, bc heās a CIVILIAN. Weāre all cowards, and itās not a bad thing bc we want to live our lives in a community and fit in and be safe. Severus is a soldier first and a teacher last; his first priority is that his charges are Not Dead, not Happy And Stable.
(Unlike mcgonagall, now thereās a professor with rotten perspective, but thatās a story for another day)
Im saying there is nothing about remus that you should dare romanticize. Heās not a perfect boo with a tragic life who remained pure and sweet despite his hardships. Heās a fucking 35 year old (ish when introduced) grown ass man with a severe but manageable condition in a world who wants him exterminated. He had shitty roommates as a kid that did more harm than good with his self esteem and moral compass.
He is what i would call āpatheticā in that his entire life is a fucking inescapable tragedy and instead of giving him the compassion he deserves, 90% of remus fans will coo at how he āisnāt bitter or mean or angry and got over his problemsā dont make me laugh