dad!Barty Crouch Jr x Potter!reader whose daughter loves special names [852 words]
concept thought up with @unstablereader
CW: fem!reader, mum!reader, kid fic, Barty & reader have a daughter, their daughter’s favourite person is her Uncle Jamie, fluff
Barty Crouch Jr was but a simple man.
He loved his wife, he loved his daughter, he loved mischief, he hated loathed despised tolerated managed his brother-in-law, and he loved causing said brother-in-law a healthy amount of grief.
“Come on, sweet girl, say Jamie. Uncle Jamie.” James cooed at his little niece that he was holding up in the air in front of him.
The little girl squealed. “Jew-wel!”
“Who the hell is Jewel!?” James shrieked before quickly trying to school his face. “No, Gemma; I’m your favourite Uncle Jamie. Your funcle! Jamie! James!”
Gemma patted her uncle’s face with a pudgy little hand. “Uncle Jew-wel.”
“Junior, what the hell is wrong with your child?” He finally spat, turning to look at him nonplussed.
Barty looked up from where he had been fiddling with a baby toy to smile sardonically at him. “I have no idea what you might be referring to, Potter.”
That earned him an exhausted scoff which only served to cause his grin to grow.
“First of all, you and bug have been married for three years, I think you’re safe to call me James.” He hissed. “Secondly, this is probably your fault; she never had a problem calling me by my name before.”
“If it was, as you say, all my fault, wouldn’t she be calling you Potter then?”
“Well that would be better than Jewel, no?”
“Uncle doesn’t like Jewel?” Gemma pouted, causing Barty to feel simultaneously victorious in his attempts to cause James grief and also devastated that his daughter was feeling any amount of distress.
“Way to go, Potter; look what you’ve done now.” He hissed.
“Wha- no! No, Gem, I love Jewel, I just don’t know who that is!”
“What the hell is going on in here?” You asked, stepping through the door to find James on the floor with your daughter near tears and Barty sneering at him from the couch.
“Your child is broken.” James let out breathlessly, turning towards you with a helpless look on his face as he held Gemma aloft in front of you.
Your eyebrows raised on your forehead quite comically at that. “I…beg your pardon?”
”I don’t know what Junior has done, but he’s broken your daughter. She doesn’t remember my name!”
Your bemused gaze lowered to your daughter, still hanging in the air.
“Gemma?”
”Hi, mummy!” She cheered, causing your lips to curve in the corners.
“Hi baby; what have you been calling Uncle Jamie?”
”Jew-wel!”
“Barty…” You chided, causing James to bark a triumphant “HA!” as he pointed at Barty accusingly. “How long were you going to let my brother spiral?”
”Just long enough.” Barty offered with a flippant shrug of his shoulders.
“Gemma,” you moved to explain, giving your brother an exasperated and apologetic look, “asked her daddy the other day why he happens to call me ‘treasure’.”
“Daddy? What’s a treasure?”
“A very special, shining, precious thing that is very important to someone.” Barty explained easily. “Why do you ask, baby?”
“Is mummy a treasure?”
Barty’s smile was simply blinding. “She is, baby; she’s daddy’s treasure. And you’re my little Gem.”
“Special names!”
“That’s right, those are some of our special names, just like mummy calls me Bee sometimes.”
“Does everyone get special names?” She asked with a little tilt to her head.
“Well, they can; but it’s usually saved for your very favourite people. Who’s one of your favourite people?”
Gemma hardly thought before she blurted “Uncle Jamie!”
Barty fought against an absolutely visceral eye roll as he tried to smile at his daughter. “Yeah? Maybe you can think of a special name for him, then.”
James looked to be just as close to tears as Gemma previously had.
“Gemma!” He cooed wetly. “Is Jewel my special name!?”
Gemma’s bemused face fell before she beamed at her uncle; liberated by the feeling of finally being understood. “Special name! Mummy is treasure, Gemma is Gem, and Uncle Jew-wel!”
”Oh my goodness.” James shrilled before he was plastering kiss after kiss to his nieces cheeks, eliciting squeal after squeal from the little girl.
You made your way over to Barty and carded your fingers through his hair before gripping the short strands at the back of his head, forcing him to look up where you stood over him.
”You’re a menace, Barty Crouch Junior.” You chided, earning you a flirty smirk from your husband.
”I’m your menace, my treasure.” He purred in response.
You hummed in acknowledgement but didn’t grace him with a response as you pressed your lips to his.
”I’m going to go bring the food to the kitchen,” you started, giving him a pointed look as you backed away, “do try to behave yourself while I’m gone.”
Not a problem, Barty thought; he was but a simple man.
He loved his wife, he loved his daughter, he loved mischief, he hated loathed despised tolerated managed his brother-in-law, and he loved causing said brother-in-law a healthy amount of grief.
But he also loved how much his daughter loved, and could he really blame her for finding her favourite person in a Potter?
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the desire to be in a relationship only comes around when you’re about to sleep, on the journey home alone, sundays, after the club, when it’s raining, winter, at the cafe, today, tomorrow and yesterday
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summary: mattheo is absolutely in love with you, but now it seems like he spent a bit too long not telling you that
warnings: cursing, suggestive language
notes: guys this was not supposed to be posted lmaooo!! but i‘ll just leave it here, now that it’s too late anyway 😭
the slytherin boys were lazily slumped over the couches in the common room, casual chattering as the fire burned in front of them.
"and then she asked me to show her how to fly sometime" enzo shrugged as he finished his explanation "i mean she was there when we learned that in first year, so i'm not sure why i would have to show her"
"you oblivious little idiot" blaise slapped a pillow against enzo's head, who let out a whimper at the sudden hit.
"she was flirting with you" draco exclaimed with a roll of his eyes and without even looking up from the newspaper he was reading.
"oh" enzo said dumbfounded.
"she knows that you're crazy about quidditch" theo added.
"yeah" mattheo agreed "she probably wanted to flatter you, telling you how good you are at flying and you didn't even understand that"
"oh" enzo mumbled once again and the regret in his voice made his friends perk up.
draco let the newspaper rest in his lap. "what did you answer?" he asked, quirking a brow.
"the exact same thing i just told you guys" enzo admitted shamefully, which was accompanied by blaise and mattheo loudly groaning.
"you really are an oblivious idiot" draco shook his head in a disappointed manner, before going back to his newspaper.
before enzo could say anything else to defend himself, there were giggles coming from the stairs. blaise and mattheo looked behind the couch simultaneously.
"speaking of oblivious" blaise snorted, before he earned himself a slap from mattheo and a simple hand gesture that told him to get off the couch and find another place to plant his arse.
blaise was barely on his feet, emptying the spot next to mattheo, when pansy and you stepped into the common room.
"hey guys" pansy greeted before she let herself fall in between draco and enzo, half onto draco's lap, which the former only grunted at.
you smiled your usual smile, waving at you friends, before you walked around the couch on which mattheo was sitting. you held up the book you were carrying to him and mattheo immediately got into position.
he turned his body, so that his legs were now resting on the couch before him. he opened them up so you could slip between them, laying your head onto his tummy, as you opened your book and got comfortable.
mattheo softly started moving his fingers through your hair. theo, on the armchair on the left of both of you, raised his eyebrows. even draco lowered his newspaper for a second, to inspect your cuddly position.
"so, y/n" theo said "why don't you tell us something about your date with that seventh year ravenclaw?"
now it was mattheo's turn to furrow his brows. theo looked perfectly innocent, but mattheo recognized a hint of mischief in his blue eyes. blaise giggled into his fist like he had just witnissed the biggest burn and enzo looked between both theo and mattheo, wondering if theo was even allowed to ask that question.
"oh" you smiled awkwardly, as you let your book sink onto your chest. "you mean leslie?"
theo nodded and closely watched mattheo's expression, who's face was full of disdain.
"go on" pansy smiled "you can tell them" she started giggling and you joined her laughter.
it was like a switch had been flipped as both you and pansy recalled the day a week before. you did not leave out one detail, from how the boy had asked you out to how the actual date went.
mattheo was not happy to hear what you had to say (or how pansy couldn't stop mentioning how handsome and attractive leslie was), but he had to admit that it was kind of funny to see theo's face fall more from minute to minute and how much regret was evident on it when you ended the story after half an hour.
it seemed like the only person who enjoyed listening was enzo, who spend most of his time asking about certain things you had said and if you had meant them in a flirting or normal way. mattheo had to admit to himself that it was probably his and the rest of the boys' fault that enzo outstretched the story with his unnecessary questions. it seemed like he wanted to make sure that nothing what happened the day before would repeat itself.
"was that everything you wanted to know?" you asked theo, admittedly a bit amused, as you noticed the panicked look on his face and the quick nod he was giving you.
"why didn't you tell me you had a date?" mattheo asked you and you almost broke your neck as you tried to look at him without sitting up.
"sorry, i didn't think it was that important" you shrugged "and i never thought that you wanted to hear anything about it, but now that i know that you guys are interested in that kind of conversation, we can speak about stuff like that more often"
it was only after pansy and you had excused yourself to go to bed, that there was a debrief happening in mattheo's and theo's room.
mattheo was walking from side to side, as the earlier events replayed themselves in his head.
"pansy and y/n are yappers" blaise noted matter of factly "and now you've actually gotten them to yap even more"
"thank you, theo" draco added sarcastically, while theo just shrugged his shoulders.
"i didn't know it would spiral into that" he excused "i was just trying to get someone to get off of his arse and talk to a certain someone, considering something between the two of them"
"it doesn't help anyone if you're talking in riddles" enzo rolled his eyes, before he got ellbowed by blaise, who pointed at the still walking mattheo. "oh" enzo nodded "you're talking about mattheo and—"
"what kind of name is leslie anyway?" mattheo cried, succesfully shutting enzo up.
"i mean have you seen the guy?" blaise laughed "his name should be the least of your concerns"
"listen, mate" theo said and all eyes turned to him "i'm not saying you should just be happy about what's happened, but it's a bit your own fault"
"my own fault?" mattheo repeated stunned.
"he's not wrong" draco shrugged "if you had the balls to go and speak to y/n, we wouldn't even be talking about a guy who obviously has a girl's name"
"i mean i get alex, but what is unisex about leslie?" enzo looked between his friends, who all shrugged.
"can we stop mentioning his fucking name, please" mattheo threw up his hands helplessly.
"well, would you rather like to talk about his huge—"
"blaise!" both mattheo and theo called loudly.
blaise raised his arms, spotting a face of innocence "geez, chill i was talking about his arms. i mean the guy is jacked"
"yeah, we get the picture" mattheo rolled his eyes, before he changed the tone of his voice, trying to imitate pansy and you from earlier "he's so good looking and funny and—"
"he's read almost every book y/n has" enzo added and all of the boys looked at him.
"whose side are you on?" theo asked tiredly, rubbing his face and realizing in that second that he was not going to sleep any time soon.
"sorry, pansy's words, not mine"
"okay, well" mattheo exclaimed, his anger subsiding momentarily "what if i'm not that handsome or well-read? i always listen to her talk about her latest book, and i don't just act like i want to hear it, i really do and i could be such a better boyfriend than this lola guy"
"leslie" blaise corrected and immediately received a dirty look from mattheo.
"look, mate" draco interrupted the staring contest between blaise and mattheo. "whatever it is that has been going on between you and y/n, we've all had the pleasure to observe it this past few years. so i'm sure we're all are at a point now where we are just fucking tired. i'm begging you, just do something about this please" draco was more emotional than he had been in years and all his friends were surprised at the sudden concern for mattheo's and y/n's love life "for the love of god, i cannot bear to try and extend any friendly behaviour further than this group, so it would be kind of unfortunate for y/n's boyfriend if he isn't part of it"
"well, aren't you just a ball of sunshine?" theo rolled his eyes.
"it's not easy being nice to all of you" draco send a side-eye in enzo's direction "even harder with certain people"
"hey!" enzo losely protested.
"i don't really care who she dates at this point" draco added "hell, let's give her blaise, at least he's not too restrained to actually do something"
"i'm not restrained" mattheo said with distain evident in his voice.
blaise smiled smugly, completely ignoring his friend. "i would show y/n a good time"
"what the fuck?!" mattheo turned to blaise with a look of betrayal "i'd rather have lucy--"
"leslie"
"--have her before you do" mattheo finished.
"this is really not the point now is it?" enzo asked, with a helpless look in theo's direction.
"enzo's right, as weird as that sounds" theo nodded "you have to do something and you have to do it fast, before she's losing the least bit of liking she seemingly has for you"
"i really have to thank you guys for your deep and honest trust in me and my abilities"
"well you've practically spend the last six years simping for her, so excuse us if we're not quite seeing the end of that yet" draco snorted.
"yeah, fine, whatever" mattheo rolled his eyes "even though all of you were wrong in many things, you're right about y/n, i'll tell her first thing tomorrow"
"tell her what exactly?"
"ehh, that i'm in love with her" mattheo said as if it was obvious.
"a bit rushed isn't it?" enzo asked, exchanging a look with draco, who seemed eagerly as critical.
"what?" mattheo asked helplessly "wasn't that what you all wanted? i mean lilly certainly didn't waste any time"
"leslie" blaise corrected once again "asked her out on a date first. maybe you could really learn something from him. i hear he's quite smart"
"are you gay?" draco suddenly asked and enzo snorted.
"i'm a realist" blaise answered "i like to scout out the competition, see what they've got on me"
"okay, sure, then i'll ask her on a date and tell her that i love her then. is that alright with you?"
"you should at least wait two to three months" draco advised.
"maybe four" enzo added.
"oh, heaven, i'm going to sleep" theo turned around and climbed into his bed.
the next morning, the slytherin boys were sitting in their usual spots at the slytherin table. there had been no sighting of either pansy or you yet, so mattheo had decided to ask you on a date during breakfast.
"what do you think is taking them so long?" he asked draco, while keeping a close eye to the entryway of the great hall.
draco, who was only a second away from answering, was quickly interrupting, when he got nudged by theo, who pointed at something - or rather someone - at the ravenclaw table.
"what?" mattheo turned his head, after draco had not answered and his friends seemed to have noticed something.
"they're already here" draco said softly, before both of his hands, landed on mattheo's shoulders, turning his body in the right direction.
mattheo's eyes found your body quickly. you were sitting next to an unfamiliar boy, pansy across from the both of you. you were engaged in a seemingly friendly conversation, throwing your head back laughing from time to time.
"lydia" mattheo said between clenched teeth his voice close to a growl.
"leslie" blaise corrected, matching the sound and tone of mattheo's voice.
mattheo stood up abruptly and all eyes followed him. "i'm gonna do something about this" he declared, before he started walking into the direction of the ravenclaw table.
"i think he could need some backup" blaise shrugged his shoulders, running after the other boy, before one of the others could protest.
"hey" mattheo greeted when he arrived at the table. pansy furrowed her brows, but you smiled when your eyes fell on him, not noticing the angry tone in his voice.
"hey" leslie smiled. "mattheo, is it?"
"sure" mattheo sat down on the bench next to pansy without so much as another word.
"so, luna" mattheo began.
"ehh, my name is leslie actually" the older boy corrected.
"whatever" mattheo rolled his eyes "nobody cares about that"
"i do" blaise quickly corrected, coming to a halt behind mattheo and outstretching his hand in leslie's direction "blaise zabini, big fan. what kind of book would you recommend to get girls?"
"i'm not sure i understand that question" leslie looked to you in confusion, but you just shook your head. "but, uh many girls like pride and prejudice by jane austen"
"ignore him" mattheo advised "you seem like you have everything in order, so i think it's the right time to ask what your intention's with y/n are"
"excuse me?" leslie asked stunned, while pansy snorted loudly. blaise nodded approvingly and you had your mouth and eyes wide open, not believing what you had just heard.
"well, young man" mattheo patted leslie's shoulder "we've all been your age once, so i don't think the question is too farfetched"
"i'm actually older than you" the ravenclaw looked to you helpingly "sorry, is he your brother or something?"
various different answers of no echoed around the table, followed by disgusted noises as pansy, mattheo, blaise and you answered the question at the same time.
"then why are you even asking that question?"
"well, lane" mattheo started, before he quickly added (successfully preventing someone to correct him) "y/n doesn't have a brother and her father is not here right now, so someone has to look out for her, right?"
"pretty sexist" pansy remarked "these aren't the 1800's, riddle"
mattheo shot pansy a quick glare before refocusing on leslie, determined to make his point. "look, I'm just trying to make sure you're treating her right," he stated, with an edge of jealousy in his voice.
leslie glanced at you, clearly bewildered. "i promise, y/n and i are just friends. we were talking about our shared interest in ancient runes."
"sure, just friends" blaise mumbled so only mattheo could hear.
"shared interest, huh?" mattheo leaned back, trying to appear nonchalant but failing miserably. "is that what you call it these days?"
you couldn't help but giggle at the absurdity of the situation. "mattheo, relax. leslie's just being friendly."
blaise, sensing the awkward tension, decided to stir the pot a bit more. "yeah, mattheo, maybe you should take some lessons from leslie on how to charm a girl with ancient runes. it's clearly working."
mattheo shot blaise a look that could melt steel. "blaise, could you stop being helpful for once?"
blaise, feigning innocence, raised his arms.
mattheo, deciding he had seen enough, concluded it was time to pull out the big guns. "so have you kissed yet? because i have done that. kissed y/n i mean, not kissed someone in general"
"matty!" you scolded, feeling embarassed by his behaviour.
"no, we haven't actually" leslie shook his head, uncomfortably looking between the people around him.
"well, we've done a lot of things" mattheo continued, easily slipping back into the familiar cockiness he normally wore with pride, even if you had hit his leg under the table more than a few times already. "you should ask her about her first time" he muttered, winking at the older boy.
pansy, who had been drinking, accidentally spit some of her pumpkin juice on her plate and blaise's mouth was wide open.
"mattheo" you shrieked, quickly stubbling onto your feet "could i talk to you for a second? alone"
"whatever you want, love" mattheo winked at leslie once again, before he followed you out of the hall.
"so about ancient runes"
outside of the great hall, mattheo was standing across from you, head down, while you were ripping him a new one.
"what has gotten into you, matty?" you asked when you had finished screaming at him.
"i'm sorry" mattheo said truthfully "i had this great plan of asking you out this morning, but seeing you with him made me so jealous and realize that it's probably too late anyway, but it's my own fault."
"what are you even talking about?" you asked confused.
"i mean you're obviously going on a second date, right?" mattheo asked "you very clearly said how charming and handsome and smart he was"
"that's true, he is all of those things"
"cool" mattheo nodded and you swore you could see a hint of sadness in his eyes "i'm happy for you then"
"yeah seems like it" you giggled, before you shook your head "well, matty you knows, leslie is amazing--"
"i've never heard anyone been complimented so much than i have heard him in the last twenty hours"
"let me finish" you smiled "he's really great, but i'm not interested in him like that"
"you're not?"
you shook your head "i think we could become good friends, but nothing more"
"but why were you sitting with him then?"
"well, he had a book he wanted to lend me" you shrugged "and i was actually on my way back to our table when you interrupted"
"oh"
"yeah, oh" you smiled "if i had known you would take all of this so harshly, i would've told you about me telling leslie i'm not interested yesterday"
"okay, that's embarrassing" mattheo admitted "i should've spoken to you in private, before i made such a scene"
"yeah, you should have" you nodded. "so, are you going to ask me out?"
mattheo grinned at you, before he grabbed your hip, pulling you closer with one fast gesture, connecting your lips.
you pulled him close by the hem of his shirt. your fingers curling into the fabric as you deepened the kiss. his hand slid from your hip to the small of your back, pressing you firmly against him. The world around you seemed to blur, the only thing that mattered was the feeling of his lips on yours, the warmth of his body against yours.
his other hand moved up to cradle your face, his thumb brushing gently across your cheek. the kiss was both passionate and tender, a perfect blend of his usual confidence and a softer side he reserved just for you. you could feel the intensity of his feelings, the months—years, even—of pent-up emotions pouring out in this single, breathtaking moment.
your heart pounded in your chest, and you could feel his racing too. it was as if all the teasing, all the uncertainty, had culminated in this moment. his lips were soft yet demanding, and you responded eagerly, your fingers now moving to tangle in his hair.
you both were breathless when you broke the kiss, heavy breathing quickly turning into laughing about how both of you had acted like idiots.
"we should get pansy and blaise and return to the others, right?" you asked and mattheo nodded eagerly.
"but you'll go out with me, yeah?"
"i think we're already past that" you joked, hinting at the years of longing gazes and physical affection between the both of you. "but sure"
you walked back into the hall holding hands, while blaise and pansy were already waiting for you.
"what happened to layla?" mattheo asked, trying to catch sight of the boy on the ravenclaw table.
"leslie—"
"—left, after blaise had gone a bit too far, asking for flirting advice"
"oh god" you hid your face in your hand "i can take you guys nowhere"
"well, you've got enough friends already, haven't you?" mattheo nudged your shoulder, as pansy's eyes fell on your connected hands.
"took you long enough" she smiled, before all of you walked into the direction of the slytherin table.
as you approached, the group noticed your intertwined hands. draco, theo, and enzo exchanged knowing glances.
"finally," theo remarked, leaning back in his seat. "i was starting to think you'd never figure it out“
draco smirked, lowering his newspaper. "i suppose this means i don’t have to pretend to be friendly to more people than absolutely necessary now"
"i think we're all just relieved we don’t have to hear more about leslie and his 'charms'" enzo grinned.
"speaking of which," draco said, looking at you and mattheo, "how did that go?"
"oh, you know“ you replied with a smirk "mattheo decided to mark his territory in the most subtle way possible“
"well, at least he's more direct than other people" theo almost giggled "i just have to imagine enzo recalling and telling holly anything he could remember from our flying classes"
"i'm sorry that i genuinely thought she wanted to know that"
"when these two can get it together, you'll get there too some day" pansy nudged enzo's shoulder and the boy send her a grateful smile.
"who needs enemies when you have friends like this" mattheo laughed with a roll of his eyes.
blaise chuckled, leaning back in his chair. " hey, at least we keep each other entertained"
enzo grinned, shooting a playful glare at blaise. "yeah, and who else would i have to embarrass myself in front of if not for you lot?"
draco raised an eyebrow at that "well, enzo, it's a good thing you have us to keep you humble“
theo nodded, a mischievous glint in his eyes. "exactly. otherwise, you might start thinking you're actually good at flying"
"now this is just unfair, you're telling me she was not only flirting, but lying too?" enzo exclaimed frustrated.
"you can't always have everything" blaise shrugged, taking a look at the vacant spot leslie had left at the ravenclaw table "at least that way there are still girls left for the rest of us"
"you do realize that y/n is not really left anymore, right?" theo ellbowed the other boy.
"well, y/n" blaise smirked "i'm sure mattheo has never even seen a copy of jane austens pride and prejudice, but guess who read it, you're right this lovely—"
"oh hell no" mattheo quickly shook his head, as he clasped a hand over blaise's mouth. "don't you even start, bethany"
flavor: fluffy and smutish but they're separated so you won't get jump scared
fluffy
literally liked you since 2cend year
saw you in herbology and was like “I may be 13 but that's the love of my life”
all his friends were goofing around with him bc he was too anxious to actually talk to you
He never even made eye contact with you he was too scared
and then you just appeared next to his seat at dinner and handed him a letter
you asked him out in your letter in the best way a second-year student can and he was bullied so hard by his friends bc he was flustered 24/7
Eventually, as your one-month anniversary turned into 6 and then a year his friends cared less and less
you guys just kept going and they just got accustomed to you two just being together it was like “Where are our parents” and then they found you both sitting in the commonroom just sitting in silence together and they're like “Aha we’ve found them”
like you've become a package deal
you guys are the healthiest relationship on the entire planet
you're perfect
he's your number one supporter no matter what you could kill a man and he'd be like “Yeah baby whatever you want”
you could walk out wearing only a belt and he'd be like “Oh fuck them up do a spin hell yeah you look bomb oh shit hell yeah baby”
He will listen to you talking about your favorite flavor of candle wax for years he just loves you soooooooo much
rates your burps you guys have been together since you were 13 years old you grew together and so it's just like nothing is gross anymore bc like “and?”
so far you have not gotten a 10 but you're working on it
you have gotten a 9.25 though so you are getting there
You guys are so stable in your relationship that even if someone does flirt with you or him the other is just like “Okay? And?”’ Like Draco will be like “Your boyfriend got flirted with today” and you're like “Alright. Hey also did you do that essay or like what?”
biter
he's a tad rabid you'll both be sitting next to each other minding your own business and he'll just lean over and bite your shoulder
and when you're like ? he's like “It's cuteness aggression, it's natural. Read a book every now and then”
once you saw how much he enjoyed quidditch and so you tried out, broke your arm, and decided not to do sports anymore
Blaise was super stressed out the entire time you were in the hospital wing he pacing constantly and muttering
He makes your breakfast plate every morning while you're passed out on his shoulder
you have so many inside jokes that have you two almost pissing yourself from laughter and everyone else is just glaring at you
impromptu dancing in sync is a bit frequent between you two
you'll get stuck in a hallway doing that “Oh they'll go that way so I should go this way” but you both go in the same direction thing and he'll just pull you in and you both waltz out of the situation before just walking off in opposite directions like nothing happened
he's literally perfect the best boy in the whole world
He listens to all your rants all the way through and takes notes
one time Draco asked if Blaise knew anything about your friends and Blaise pulled out one of those corkboards with the red yarn
he's like perposterly good at history of magic
massive lover of study dates and nap dates
your grades skyrocket every time you ask for his help stg
spoils you rotten his mother is a breadwinner dude she bathes in 100-dollar bills
also he is a total mommas boy he sends his mom a letter every single day
when you did meet her you were like “Aha so that's where his good looks come from” Pansy heavily thirsted over her she was actively asking Blaise how old she was like “Mm that's not that big of an age difference” and Blaise was like “You're not rich enough babe cut your losses and end with dignity”
you guys are passing letters
he will be writing out love poems and handing them to you while stealing a piece of bacon off your plate
he's so deeply in love with you and has been for so long that he just like gives no shits anymore
yeah he gets all wimpy and lovey-dovey around you of course he would what are talking about dude
if anyone is like “Dude you're pussywhipped” or whatevs yk ppl hate Simps yadaa yada hell just be like “Yeah? and? which one of us in in the committed relationship again?”
god he is so-
he's just such a loverboy
he remembers every anniversary, holiday, birthday, and the day you first made eye contact with him, every time there's something important going on with you he remembers
he has your friends' birthdays memorized better than you do
his job is trophy husband and that's about as far as he goes(I'm lying he's so DTDTUYUgfADXZaSFDFZjcADFAGYUA ZXDJADHJKYJWAEMQC DFSIN)
he's so funny You're giggling all the time
nsfw(ish)
tits guy unless you don't have tits then he's all over your ass dude
this one time you guys were relaxing in his dorm as one does and Draco walked in and you were straight up just shirtless laying back against Blaise and he was just holding your tits (he's self-soothing its fine) and you guys were just like “hey:)” “hi:) how was your test” Draco just turned around and left
if he ever sees you laying down on your stomach he's flinging himself to you as fast as he can so he can use your ass as his pillow
you think he's weird though when he does that so you're like “Dude what if I fart” and he's like “Why do you have to rain on my parade?” And he continues to do it bc like that's his home<3
every time you walk past him he slaps your ass
you threatened to stab him once because he did it out of habit in front of a teacher and both got detention
he oddly talks dirty quite well however he always does it at the worst of times
You'll be mid-conversation about Enzo’s grades and he'll lean over and whisper the filthiest thing in your ear and you're just like “:/ who raised you?”
munch when he got older he went through a beard phase and shit was bleached 24/7 it was basically platinum
grabbing your ass if you breathe a little differently like the only time hell stop is if his hands are cut off
he likes leaving the door unlocked just cause “babe someone could walk in that makes it 10x more exciting” “I wish you'd shut the fuck up sometimes”
is so used to you shaking ass on him at the randomist of times he's learned how double task so he’ll fully be standing next to Lorenzo and explaining something to him while Pansy is showing you her new playlist and you find a song you like and you’re like “Where is boyfriend the shaking of ass must commenece” and he continues to explain everything to Lorenzeo while you do
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When you tell James last night was a mistake he's determined to prove you wrong.
This is part two of ‘I dare you to steal his clothes - James Potter version’. Read the first part here, not that this is very plot driven but still.
Warning: smut, minimal plot
— The request —
The James fic was so hot wtf 👹👹👹 we need part 2 dear author 😭😭😭
— The writing —
You walked through the hallways of Hogwarts but your mind was still stuck in that bathroom where you had yesterday tried and more or less succeeded in stealing James Potter’s clothes. He had given you a night to remember and as dreamy as you still were about those activities, you were also very much aware that it was James Potter. He was your crush, but to him you were probably nothing more than a fun night. It was not like he was suddenly going to fall in love with you after one night of heavenly sex.
“Moony, you’re not hearing me. She’s the one.” Remus rolled his eyes as James almost jumped up and down next to him, ever since last night’s events James had been going on about you non stop. Sirius and Peter had weaselled their way away from James and had left Remus to listen to James’ rants alone. Remus rearranged some books on the shelves of the library, because nothing’s more annoying than misplaced books. “I need your advice, moony, I’ve been crushing on her since the start of the year and after last night I need to make a move or I might lose her to the next guy she’s being dared to steal clothes from.” Remus turns away from the shelves to face James. “I honestly don’t think that she would repeat last night's events with anyone beside you.” Feeling reassured and a bit more confident, James’ signature smirk returns. “You think so? You think I’m special to her?” Remus sighs and rolls his eyes again. “Yeah, I’m pretty sure she likes you. I mean no one sleeps with someone you hate.” James’ eyebrows knit together. “You obviously haven’t had heated hate sex.” Remus shakes his head no. “You?” James also shakes no. “No, I’m just thinking it would be hot… not as hot as last night, I mean, (y/n) and me-” “I don’t want to hear it again, James!” Remus interrupts and quickly continues. “Just go talk to her, use all your charm and you will win her over.”
You were still deep in thoughts, when James leaves the library and spots you. “Hey, hey, (y/n)! We need to talk.” Your eyes fling up to meet his and James is almost horrified to see how filled with panic your eyes are. You quickly scan the hallways for a way out, but fail to find a good excuse. James quickens his pace to keep up with you. “About last night…” James starts, nervously ruffling his hair, but before he has a chance to continue you speak up. “It was a mistake.” James’ face falls, but you don’t notice and continue. “I get it. I’m cool about it. Last night was just a thing and it won't happen again.” James nods as he listens to you, watching your serious expression and sinking his hands into his pockets. You suddenly stop walking and turn to him. You force a tightlipped smile and tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. You hold out a hand to James. “Friends?” You ask with a shaky voice and flustered face. For a second James looks utterly confused, but he quickly realises that your flusteredness might have something to do with how you had screamed his name last night. James tilts his head and chews his lip, eyes focussing on yours. “What if I say no?” Your face instantly heats up. Why can’t he just be casual about it. Why does he have to be so James Potter about it!
“I got the sense that you liked what I did last night.” Your face was hitting tomato alert, but he just shamelessly continued. “Honestly, I enjoyed it as well. You felt amazing.” He whispers, while his eyes dart between you and everyone in the hallway to make sure no one overhears. “James-” Your protest comes out as a shaky whisper as your body craves James in an unholy way. “Come on, love one more time and then you can decide whether I’m worth keeping around or if you really just want to be friends.” Your expression goes blank as you process what James had just said. Did the James Potter just suggest that if you wanted he would be yours? Afraid that you weren’t fully convinced, James makes one last move, leaning closer to you with his lips almost brushing your ear. “You can have whatever you want, baby… my dick, fingers, tongue, I’ll give you anything you want.” His voice was husky and dirty, but there was also an almost inaudible nervousness as he worried whether you would accept his offer or just forget about him.
A silent yes in your eyes had told James that he could guide you to a nearby empty classroom. As soon as he closed the door behind you he wrapped an arm around your figure, pulling you against him. His eyes focus on yours as his free hand cups your cheek. “I know it’s only been a few hours, but fuck I missed you.” You smile and James is wild with excitement that he got you close to him again. Eagerly his lips search yours and you immediately move with his, making the kiss go from passionate to hunger. He picks you up and you can’t help but giggle at his enthusiasm. He places you on a nearby desk and he’s quick to take off his own shirt, giving you a worthy view. Your hand wanders over his chest and muscles. There was a reason Gryffindor won almost every game. This boy worked for it.
As amused and turned on as James was by your staring he really wanted your focus on kissing him. With a gentle finger he pushed your chin up to look at him so he could kiss you tenderly and deeply. It also gave him the opportunity to quickly undo a few buttons so he could pull your shirt over your head. With your hair now slightly messed up you looked even more desirable to him. Eagerly his lips move over yours again while his hands move to gently squeeze your breasts before unclasping your bra in one swift move. James struggles to keep his lips on you as his eyes desperately search for a glimpse of your chest. With a loving touch his hands massage the flesh of your boobs. A slightly suppressed moan reveals James’ excitement together with the growing bulge in his pants pressing against your panties. Pushing you back on the desk James now moves away from your lips to allow himself to play with your nipples, earning soft sounds from you as sensations build up, soaking your panties as he sucks on the sensitive skin.
Unable to keep himself in check James rocks his hips into yours, searching for fiction. You quickly slip a hand in his pants, making him groan as you tease his member. One hand pumps his dick while your other hand moves through his curls. Under your touch James only manages to leave sloppy kisses as precum stains his pants. He curses himself under his breath. This was not how he planned it on going, he needed to spoil you and not the other way around. So rather abruptly and roughly James grabs your hand and takes a step back so he can take off your skirt and panties. You open your mouth to ask whether you did anything wrong, but James doesn’t let you and kisses you roughly while moving a finger through your folds, making you squirm against him at the sudden touch. “Last night was not a mistake.” James breathes with a rough undertone as he watches your eyes fill with pleasure at his touch. Your slightly parted lips looked so delicious to you, but he wanted to hear you so instead he peppers kisses down your neck, while his fingers fuck you.
Your fingers entangle with his hair as pleasure rushes through you. You whimper his name as he pushes you closer to your high, making him work harder to get you there. He watches you with focus to pinpoint the exact second before you’ll cum so he can pull his fingers away from you, making you whine in need of him and a climax. Your needy eyes turn him on so much he has to grab his crotch for a second. “Trust me, love.” James whispers and pushes your legs wider with one move, making you yelp at the exposure and heave your chest. The view you were giving him, exposed and flustered had him struggling to not just fuck you right then and there but he was committed to make you his and have you every night from now on. With his eyes glued to yours he slowly kisses down from your lips to your pussy to finish the building orgasm he had kept from you only seconds earlier.
Your body tenses and your fingers cling to James’ curls as your wall clench. James can’t resist jerking himself as you gently and unknowingly push his face against your pussy, reaching your high. It takes a second before you have the strength to push the strong man between your legs away from your overstimulated cunt. As soon as you see his pleased smirk you know he isn’t done with you. You raise your hand to protest, but he just grabs your wrist, pulling you off the desk to turn you around. He presses you against him, your naked body against his bare chest. He still holds on to your wrist as his other hand slips between your legs again. “James.” You whine and he shushes you. “You still think last night was a mistake?” He teases you, placing kisses under your ear. He rubs his hard bulge against your bare ass and your sensitive pussy starts throbbing at just the thought of his thick member filling you like last night. “No, it wasn’t a mistake.” You breathe and James kisses your neck tenderly, before bending you over the desk and freeing his member from his pants.
Gently he slips inside you, holding you close as he fucks you passionately, like you were the only woman that mattered, a goddess to him, and only him for the rest of his life from now on.
'you still listen to music from 10 years ago 🤨?' bitch if prehistoric humans had audio recording technology id be sat up here listening to grog and unga bunga's greatest hits don't play with me
“but what if my friend gets offended and hates me and refuses to speak to me after i set a boundary” easy peasy! that is not your friend. hope this helps
Luna dares you to steal his clothes while he’s showering. I mean what can possibly go wrong… *wink wink*
Warning: smut, making out and the guys are fully naked
Mattheo and Theo picture source: https://pin.it/4GWiiih
I’m back with more low quality, cheap smut. Feedback is rewarded with my love, like even a small typo, just please let me know.
I wrote a part 2 for Mattheo and Theo: The day after the dare. Also wrote “I dare you to steal his clothes” for Draco and Tom.
You were sitting in the slytherin common room. It was late and the party was dying down but your friends refused to go to their dorms.
“Truth or dare?” Luna asks as she tries to focus on you but she’s clearly too drunk to manage that.
“Dare.”
Luna tries to get her brain to come up with a good dare, something fun. It is then that she sees a certain slytherin holding a towel and heading for the bathroom.
Mattheo Riddle
“I dare you to steal Mattheo’s clothes while he’s showering.” You groan, you preferred to stay as far away from him as possible, but then again if you were sneaky enough he would probably never figure out it was you.
You had managed to sneak in without making any noise. You were relieved there was only one person in the bathroom. You tiptoed towards the pile of clothing and just as you were reaching for it you noticed that the water had stopped running.
“Accio.” Is all you heard before being pulled backwards straight into Mattheo. His strong arms immediately wrapped around you and pushed you against his still wet body.
“You were dared to do this, weren’t you?” Mattheo whispers in your ears, his voice is calm and amused. You swallow and lick your lips in an attempt to calm yourself. “Yes.” You murmur as you try to wiggle your way out of his arms, but he just tightens his grip more. The water droplets on his body are sinking into the fabric of your shirt.
You sigh. “Just let me go. And like, lend me your tie or something so they know I tried. I don’t want them to think I chickened out.” Mattheo leans in closer to your neck, his warm breath on your skin makes your whole body heat up. “Riddle.” You wanna complain but it comes out desperate.
“I have a better idea.” Mattheo says right before he spins you around. Your back clashes with a wall as he pushes you against it with his whole body. His amused smirk gives you mixed feelings of worry and desire. “Just the tie is fine.” You protest as his face inches towards you. You fear that if Mattheo actually kisses you, you will lose all sanity and he will have you begging in no time.
You can feel his hardening member between your legs. A not so subtle reminder that he’s naked. Mattheo’s hand lingers on your leg gently making his way up under your skirt. Your body tenses under his touch. “You can always leave. Or you can stay and maybe I’ll let you walk away with my clothes.”
As you consider your options he watches your face and slowly leans into you, his pleased grin never faltering. After a moment of quiet sexual tension Mattheo grabs your ass and lifts you up without warning. A soft noise leaves your lips and Mattheo sees your parted lips as an open invitation. His mouth is on yours and his tongue immediately starts exploring.
His hard cock teases your pussy through your panties. Out of desperation you wrap your legs around him, pulling him closer, searching for more sensation. He breaks the kiss and admires your flustered face. “Look at you. Always acting like you're better than me and now I’ll have you calling me daddy in no time.” His arrogance turns you on as much as it infuriates you.
Mattheo grabs your chin to angle your face right, leaving your neck exposed. He starts kissing and nibbling at your sensitive spot, while his hips rock into yours. Your fingers entangle in his beautiful dark curls but only for a moment. You are not an easy prey.
You tugg his hair so he pulls away from your neck. “Not happening, Riddle.” His arrogant smug face starts cracking and he clenches his jaw. “You’re pretty entertaining, but I’ll not be calling you daddy.” You say trying to sound brave while you unwrap your legs. With dark eyes he lets you slip out of his hands so you land on your feet. “No tie for you, you’ll fail your dare.” You smile at his attempt to persuade you.
“Don’t worry about me Riddle, worry about the little fella between your legs.” You take a step and reluctantly he lets you walk away. Now that there’s some distance between you two your eyes fall on his hard thick member and you bite your lip, slightly impressed by his size. When you’re near the door Mattheo can’t help but try one more time. “My roommates are going to be out for a few more hours, just so you know, in case you change your mind.” You lick your lips as you're holding the door. “Sorry pretty boy, it’s going to be you and your hand tonight.”
As you close the door behind you Mattheo looks around clearly frustrated that he got played like this. An annoyed huff leaves his lips. You had already caught his eye but now you were definitely on his radar. He urgently needs another shower to cool down.
Meanwhile you walked back to your friends still shaking from all the things Mattheo had you feeling. When they see you walk in they stop talking and stare. “Yeah, it didn’t go as planned.” You say with a soft voice and a flustered face. Suddenly Luna points, clearly still out of it. “Is that a hickey?” Your eyes widen as your hand covers your neck. “Oh. My. God.” Pansy’s dramatic voice draws even more attention, while Hermoine eyes show flashes of pure panic.
Enzo Berkshire
“I dare you to steal Lorenzo’s clothes while he’s showering.” Your eyes widen and you blush. You wondered if Luna dared you to do this because she had somehow figured out you had a crush on the Slytherin.
Either way you were currently standing in front of the bathroom door. You quietly open the door and tiptoe inside, while scanning for his clothes. However, Enzo already noticed you before you managed to spot his clothes. “Did they dare you to join me in the shower? Because you are more than welcome, darling.” You turn around with red cheeks and see Enzo with a bright smirk.
But honestly your eyes don’t linger on his face for very long. They immediately drop down to his very naked body and his dick. “Enjoying the show?” He asks and you quickly turn around. “Um, I’m sorry. I didn’t notice.” You stammer, making Enzo chuckle. “If you stare for as long as you did, you’ve definitely noticed everything.” He emphasizes the last word. “I was dared to steal your clothes.” You confess, hoping he won’t think you’re some pervy girl.
“That’s just boring. I dare you to join me for a shower, I will help you wash.” You feel your whole body heat up. “You can’t just dare me, I can still pick ‘truth’.” You hear him walk towards you, but you don’t dare to turn around assuming he’s still naked. “You’re right. So, truth then: did you like what you saw?” Your mouth falls open and suddenly you feel his breath on your neck. His eyes carefully watching your red face.
“You are unbelievable!” You try and take a step to put some distance between you two, but he wraps his arm around you. “Unbelievably hot? Handsome? Long? Big?” He teases you while his face nestles in his hair. “You know if you’re not going to tell me then you’re going to have to shower with me.”
***
“So strange, it’s been an hour and (y/n) still hasn’t come back.” Luna asks with a very confused tone. Hermoine smiles, having her suspicions. “Maybe she just got a little distracted while trying to steal Lorenzo’s clothes.”
Blaise Zabini
“I dare you to steal Zabini’s clothes while he’s showering.” You swallow. “I don’t know if that’s such a good idea.” Convincing drunk Luna was impossible. So here you were sneaking around in the Slytherin boys bathroom gathering Blaise’s scattered clothes like some weirdo. You had finally collected every piece and tiptoed your way to the door. However, you were still only halfway when you were spotted.
“Hey, hey, what do you think you’re doing, little smooth criminal?” You hear Zabini shout as you're holding all of his clothes. “Nothing.” You instinctively answer. He wants to say something but is distracted when he sees your eyes scan down his body. “Princes, my eyes are up here.” You let out a nervous laugh as you glue your eyes to his. It has never been so difficult to not look at something.
You don’t dare to take your eyes off his face as he walks towards you. When he stops right in front of you you feel like you’re turning into pudding. He slowly leans in, his eyes never leaving yours. Then suddenly he pulls out a towel from behind you and wraps it around his waist. You sigh relieved that you can let your eyes wander again.
“Can I have my clothes back, little thief?” He asks with an adorable smile plastered on his face. “No, I’m stealing them for a dare.” You explain like you now have every right to steal his clothes. He tilts his head, not satisfied with your excuse. “I really need them.” You urge and you earn yourself a baffled expression from him. “So do I.”
“Clothes are overrated. You can go naked.” Blaise quirks an eyebrow. “I mean you have your towel.” You gesture to his slutty low hanging towel and when he looks down you head for the door. Unfortunately, you don’t get very far as he grabs a hold of your wrist. You stumble and fall into him, making you drop some of the clothes you were holding and causing his towel to loosen and fall down. As soon as you notice that his rather large member is revealed again you glue your eyes back to his. “Your towel.” He’s so amused with your flustered face that it really doesn’t bother him anymore.
His lips catch yours by surprise, but it doesn’t take long for you to relax into the kiss. Things heat up quickly. Your hands snake around his neck and he starts exploring your entire body, squeezing and cupping your breasts while gripping your ass and pulling you into his hips. You never stop touching each other as he walks you towards the shower. “I’m going to have to steal your clothes.” He explains as he pulls your shirt over your head. “Understandable.” Is all you say.
After more than an hour you return to your friends. “Did you take a shower?” Hermoine questions when she notices you walk in with wet hair. “Who cares! Did you get his clothes?” Luna screams in excitement about the dare. “Damn, I forgot about that.” You sigh and Luna looks confused. “Then what have you been doing all this time?” “Me.” You hear Blaise say as he passes you and your friends on his way to his room. You glare but his smile doesn't fade.
Theodore Nott
“I dare you to steal Nott’s clothes while he’s showering.” You roll your eyes as soon as you hear his name. All of your friends were convinced that you had a thing for him and you definitely admired his looks but you just couldn’t stand his smug face.
“Run in, grab his clothes and run out. Easy.” You whispered to yourself before slamming the door open with zero tact and running in. He of course immediately notices you. You spot a pile of clothes on the other side of the room and sprint towards it. When he realizes what you’re up to he steps out of the shower and heads towards the door.
You quickly hug the pile of clothes against your chest and turn around with the intention of running out, but there’s a flaw in your plan. Well, more like a very naked Theo leaning against the door. “I’m assuming you were dared to do this?” He raises an eyebrow. “Duh, why else would I be running around stealing clothes?” You were annoyed with his question and he was annoyed with your answer.
As you walk towards him it’s harder for you to ignore his massive cock, like its size is almost bothering you. No wonder his ego is so massive, just like his dick. He licks his lips as he watches you stare at him for a second too long to go unnoticed. When you look up and see his smirk, you sigh. “Just let me pass, Nott.” He shakes his head. “You come running in here, try to steal my clothes and expect me to let you walk out. You really aren’t that bright.” You narrow your eyes at him. “But you’re pretty, so maybe we can arrange something.”
The only thing between you two is the pile of clothes that you’re holding against your chest. Theo tucks a few strands of hair behind your ear. “Come on, if you get on your knees for me I’ll let you walk out of here with my clothes.” You consider your options, but he makes choosing easier by leaning in and kissing you roughly. He bites your lips and you open your mouth while simultaneously dropping his clothes. Your fingers tangle in his hair and you press yourself against him. He eagerly embraces your lust and lets himself lean against a wall.
Your hands roam his naked chest and slowly you make your way to his already harding member. When you finally wrap your hand around his thick cock he lets out a soft moan. Even though his eyes are shut he knows you're smiling against his lips. You start pumping his dick and stroking his tip. Theo's breaths become messy. He hates that you know how much you turn him on, but he can’t help himself. More than once, has he spent his time daydreaming about you going down on him and now your lips were slowly making their way down from his neck to his chest to…
“You’re already leaking cum for me.” You taunt him and he looks down at you. Fuck, seeing you on your knees holding his cock. It does things to him. “But if you think something is going to happen, then you aren’t very bright, Theo.” With those words you jump up and grab his clothes, running like your life depends on it.
Panting you reach your friends and hold Theo’s clothes up in victory. Luna cheers excitedly. Some time passes and you’ve all decided to play one last round, when suddenly Theo walks in wearing nothing but a towel and if looks could fuck, then.. you know, definitely fucked. The lust in his eyes was dangerously attractive. His eyes never leave yours as he gathers his clothes laying next to you. “I’ll get you for this.” He says with a husky voice and licks his lips. Hermoine frowns and laughs nervously. “Why do I get the feeling this is about more than just stealing clothes?” Your heart starts racing as you watch Theo walk away, you might have gotten yourself in trouble.
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Edit Note: I'm really amazed by how much love this post got. Guess it just shows we're all in the same boat. I do have other humorous writing memes on this tumblr under the same tag, if you're interested. Never give up writing! ❤️
Edit Note 2: I can't believe this has reached 10000+ notes. Been on tumblr for almost ten years (different account) and nothing like this has ever happened before. Thank you! 😊
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