🍑shy peach🍑

pink juice boxes  I’m open for commissions ❤

♡

❛ one word, two syllables: demarcation. ❜ ❛ relax, everything’s under control. ❜ ❛ sha-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta! ❜ ❛ jinx, you owe me a kiss on the lips. ❜ ❛ pick up your books….stupid. ❜ ❛ oh my god, the wifi here sucks ass. ❜ ❛ hey, maybe get off the computer and….go outside? ❜ ❛ nope, this house was built without a bathroom; we just shit on the floor. it’s over there you fucking idiot. ❜ ❛ hey did you hear that gay marriage is legal now in the u.s.? ❜ ❛ you wanna get married? ❜ ❛ not today, okay? ❜ ❛ it’s really incalcalacable. ❜ ❛ okay, um, can you just tell me, please? ❜ ❛ do you want me to tell them? ❜ ❛ you don’t know what it is. ❜ ❛ frankly, i’m a little bit insulted that you have to keep asking about it. ❜ ❛ oh, well, yeah, he’s onto me. ❜ ❛ whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. watch out for this guy. ❜ ❛ he was like a son to me. ❜ ❛ there’s no pizza left? ❜ ❛ you can have my crusts. ❜ ❛ no one even told me the pizza was here. ❜ ❛ you stepped on d.j. roomba! ❜ ❛ hey bro, wanna go get our grub on? ❜ ❛ you know, for a gay couple, you guys are being really gay. ❜ ❛ even though it is bad for me, i am going to do it. ❜ ❛ why did you kill me, _______? ❜ ❛ i’m gonna haunt you, _______. ❜ ❛ i’m gonna follow you and play the black eyed peas non stop! ❜ ❛ agent little dick, do you copy? ❜ ❛ what’s the formula for that fucking hairline? ❜ ❛ did you just say “red 100 emoji” out loud? ❜ ❛ abracadabra, bitch! ❜ ❛ babe, i’m reading harry potter: the prisoner of azkaban, what do you want? ❜ ❛ hey nerd, give me your lunch money. ❜ ❛ get out of my doritos! ❜ ❛ can i give you some constructive criticism? it fucking sucks. ❜ ❛ ______, i may be drunk, but you’re beautiful and smart and know how to moisturize. ❜ ❛ this guy was talking trash, so i beat him up. ❜ ❛ it’s over between us, bro. ❜ ❛ i’m an adult. i do grown up things. independence. ❜ ❛ …am i a meme? ❜ ❛ did you just break the boat? ❜ ❛ she’s really funny, and she’s warm, and she’s just…well, anyway. ❜ ❛ it’s not like we’re actually kissing. ❜ ❛ are you horse-whispering to me? ❜ ❛ i saw the light. my entire life flashed before my eyes. i gotta do more. ❜ ❛ i tried to make ramen in the coffee pot, and i broke everything. ❜

[ text ] hello it’s me drunk me. the ghost of drunkmas past [ text ] i love being white girl wasted [ text ] that’s when you know you’re wastypants [ text ] fuzzy is the best, sloppy is ugly [ text ] if i wasn’t wearing a sweater i’d send you a bra selfie [ text ] i’m drunk peeing [ text ] CUTTHROAT KITCHEN THOOOOOOOOO [ text ] sabotage me [ text ]  things are happening, i’m not sure what  [ text ] who am i [ text ] gbbo would never, mary berry would NEVER [ text ] you win honor who wants money [ text ] i want the money [ text ] why am i sloppy [ text ] i’m pooping or peeing we’re not sure yet [ text ] i’m still on the toilet [ text ] drunk me is a mess of knowledge [ text ] wow i love drunk me [ text ] drunk me: factchecking [ text ] lemme send you a hoe selfie [ text ] meanwhile i keep sending sloppy hoe selfies [ text ] i’m changing into my batman pjs [ text ] this will be my downfall i hate myself me and my pink panther print panties [ text ] leak this pic [ text ] don’t trust me i’m drunk me [ text ] my face feels funny [ text ] see i can type i am in control [ text ] i’ve been sending drunk snaps in my defense [ text ] i’m like one step away from dabbing [ text ] drunk me: laughs in hidden.jpg [ text ] i drunk snapped ____ and ____ while singing beyoncé [ text ] i’ll look at this tomorrow and cringe [ text ] i am sober and in control of the situation [ text ] i sent a ass selfie to ____ captioned: EAT THIS BEN AFFLECK [ text ] HE HAS BATMAN ASS [ text ] i don’t feel more sober at all [ text ] i should be asleep but my drunk thirsty ass is like: cute girl [ text ] i am just a simple farmer [ text ] do the sleepo [ text ] i’m drunk talking to a cute girl [ text ] drunk me is a hoe a THIRSTY hoe [ text ] i won’t remember this in the morning [ text ] i’m not sloppy drunk i’m soft drunk, i call it 4 shots and a glass of champagne [ text ] drunk me: time to thirst message all my friends / flings / exes [ text ] idk what he’s saying but i’m like raw me daddy [ text ] don’t kinkshame me [ text ] i love my aunt she’s trying to get me more drunk [ text ] i have like 70% awareness of what’s going on around me right now  [ text ] i might dab again on snapchat who knows 

In Your Eyes | do not edit (1, 2)