Xif

songs -beauty and the beast movie -exo -goblin -million reasons

crazy in love by beth (fifty shades of grey version) is on repeat since last night and now that i am starting to write my research paper its still on repeat bcos damn this song is turning my my mind on and now its on the move 

im not yet finished with my ten page handwritten research paper which is due tomorrow but here i am oh look how fcked up my life is

so speaking about janusz, this kid has a dyslexia. One time, my unstoppable mouth was too reckless that i blurted out "do you know what's dyslexia is? you actually have that" he said "no" so i explained it to him, i didnt say that its a leraning disorder though. he then said "do you also have that teacher?" and i shook my head and he smiled so wide and i was shocked. i thought that he would be sad and would ask me to help him overcome it since its not normal for a child to have that but bro he said "SO I HAVE POWERS THAT YOU DONT HAVE? YAAAY" and that moment i felt like crying. Children are innocent pls protect them at all cost

So I became a student teacher in kinder 2 today. A boy named janusz cried and I was comforting him when one of my fellow student teacher said "boys dont cry" and i was like "hey dont say that" AND PLS TO ANYONE AND EVERYONE!! NEVER TELL A YOUNG BOY THAT ITS NOT ALRIGHT FOR THEM TO CRY! DONT PLANT THAT TO THEIR YOUNG MINDS. THIS IS WHY GROWN UP MEN ARE PRONE TO DEPRESSION BECAUSE EVEN WHEN THEY WERE YOUNG THEY ARE THOUGHT THAT THEY SHOULD NOT CRY THATS WHY THEY BOTTLE IT UP JUST TO BE MAN AND ACT LIKE A MAN. BOYS AND MEN CAN CRY AND CAN BE EMOTIONALLY UNSTABLE IN PUBLIC JUST LIKE HOW WE, GIRLS AND LADIES, CAN. DONT CROWD THEIR BELIEFS WITH THIS SOCIETY'S FUCKED UP STANDARDS THAT CREATE SOMEONE'S DEMON

I just realized how fucked up my life is when I saw my grandma. She's almost 70 and she still doesnt need to wear an eyeglass AND she has a sharp memory. While me? A teenager who lives in a blurry world everytime. EVERYTIME. because I always forget my eyeglasses.