how to have fun on duty 101
hexenzirkle witch! reader x varka.
sypnosis: tasked by Alice to keep watch over Mondstadt in person, you decide to entertain yourself by taking on different roles within the city—changing your occupation as you please. Yet to the citizens of Mondstadt, nothing ever changes. In their minds, you have always been exactly who you are when they see you.
Only Varka seems to notice the inconsistency.
contains: 4.1k wc, female reader, fluff, reader is lowk a troll, varka being silly, varka is also indicated to be taller and bigger than reader (hv you seen his hand vs lohen oml..), kinda slow burn?
Varka was certain he had never been wrong about a person before—until he met you.
The Grandmaster had stopped by the cathedral one afternoon in search of Barbara for some light healing after a morning of training recruits. The injuries on his hands were nothing serious, just the usual wear from constant sparring, but he had learned long ago that ignoring small things often led to larger problems later on. Mondstadt was peaceful, but the knigths were never idle, and neither was he.
What he hadn't expected was to be greeted by an unfamiliar woman.
You were standing among the nuns near the altar, speaking with them as though you were part of the daily rhythm of the cathedral. There was nothing unusual about your posture or your presence, nothing that suggested that you didn't belong, and yet the moment Varka saw you, something in him faltered because he was certain he had never seen you before in his life.
"Oh?" he said, pausing. "I wasn't aware we have someone new in the cathedral."
The conversation around you stopped almost immediately as the nuns turned towards him with polite confusion, as though his question itself was strange.
Grace tilted her head slighlty, "A new face?" she repeated, as if trying to understand what he meant.
"Grandmaster, what are you talking about?" Victoria asked.
Grace's brow furrowed faintly as she looked between Varka and you. "[Name] has been with us for as long as I can remember," she said, her tone carrying absolute certainty. "How could you forget the second deaconess, Grandmaster?"
'Huh..?' The words made something in Varka's mind stall.
He glanced over at you again, then back at the nuns, searching for any sign of uncertainty, any hesitation that might suggest a misunderstanding or a simple prank they decided to play on him.
Grace, Victoria and the others all looked genuinely puzzled by his reaction, as though the question he had asked made no sense at all.
And yet, no matter how long he looked, he could not recall ever meeting you.
As far as he knew, Barbara was the only deaconess of the cathedral...
The realisation should have unsettled him more than it did, but what unsettled him even further was the fact that you were smiling at him as though this entire situation was perfectly ordinary. More than that, nothing in him reacted with alarm. Even his instincts, honed through years of battle and command, remained quiet. There was no sense of threat, no warning to step back or prepare for combat.
"You must have had a long day," you finally said, stepping forward slightly. "Training recruits can be rather exhausting, Grandmaster."
Before he could respond, you raised a hand towards his arm, your attention shifting to the shallow cuts he had almost forgotten about. "May I?" you asked, already reaching for him without pressing.
Varka hesitated for only a moment before extending his hand. Something about the way you moved made resistance feel unnecessary, not because he trusted you fully, but because there was an odd sense of inevitability to it, as though this interaction had already been decided long before he arrived.
The moment your fingers made contact with his skin, warmth spread through him.
It felt like sunlight pressing gently against his muscles, easing tension he had not realised he was carrying. The shallow cuts closed almost instantly, the skin knitting itself back together in a way that suggested precision far beyond ordinary healing. Even the lingering soreness from hours of training seemed to dissolve, leaving behind an unfamiliar lightness in his arm.
He exhaled slowly, forcing a light laugh as he rolled his shoulders back, "Hahaha...maybe," he said, scratching the back of his head as if trying to shake off the strange feeling. "That might be a sign I should start taking breaks earlier in the day."
You only smiled at that, and then without lingering any longer, you turned back towards the nuns and continued your work as though nothing unusual had happened at all.
Varka remained for a moment longer, watching you as you moved seamlessly back into the rhythm of the cathedral.
Eventually, he convinced himself that perhaps he had simply misremembered. It was an easy explanation, especially after months away from Mondstadt. Faces blurred together over time, and he had never been particularly good with names outside of battlefields and command structures.
By evening, he had almost managed to let it go.
The streets of Mondstadt were lively when he arrived at Angel's Share, the glow of lanterns spilling warm light across the cobblestones. Laughter drifted out from the tavern, mixed with the sound of music and clinking glasses, and Varka allowed himself to relax as he stepped inside.
The relaxation did not last long.
Behind the counter, you were there again.
Varka stopped just inside the entrance without realising, his gaze locked onto you immediately.
There was no mistaking it.
The same face he had seen at the cathedral only hours earlier was now serving drinks behind the bar with practiced ease, speaking with customers as though you had done this job for years.
Rosaria, seated nearby on the bar, glanced at him over her drink with mild disinterest. "I don't think Barbara works here, Varka." she said flatly, before returning to her glass.
Varka shook his head slightly, still not taking his eyes off you. "No, I'm not talking about Barbara..I meant [Name]."
Rosaria's gaze flicked over to you before it settled back onto him, "[Name] isn't a deaconess, Grandmaster," she added, as though correcting something obvious.
At the sound of your name, you looked up from the drink you were preparing, giving him a small smile as you finished the drink you were working on, sliding it across the counter to Kaeya, who was already watching the exchange with quiet amusement.
Kaeya gave you a small nod of thanks before taking a slow sip, clearly enjoying himself. "She's been working here for quite a while," he said casually, as though confirming something universally known. "One of the best bartenders in Mondstadt, actually. You've had her drinks before, Grandmaster. Don't tell me you've forgotten?"
"I don't remember ordering from her before.."
Kaeya raised an eyebrow, "Well your memory does get fuzzy when you drink.."
Varka didn't respond immediately. His attention had drifted back to you, watching the way you moved behind the counter, the way customers interacted with you as though there was nothing unusual about your presence at all. Someone even greeted you warmly as they entered, and you responded without hesitation, calling them by name as though you had known them for years.
Everyone else seemed completely certain you had always been here.
Just like the nuns in the cathedral.
"..What are you?" Varka finally asked, lowering himself onto the stool beside Kaeya, his voice quieter now, gaze serious.
The question hung in the air for only a moment.
You blinked from behind the counter, tilting your head slightly, the same small smile still present on your face.
"Just a bartender, Grandmaster," you said gently, as if the question itself was unnecessary. "Perhaps your workload is getting to you."
Varka sighed, running a hand through his hair, "I..maybe."
You poured another drink and slid it towards him without breaking eye contact for long.
Kaeya let out a low whistle, placing his empty glass down. "Lucky," he commented lightly. Then, turning his attention back to the counter, he added, "On another note, what do you put in these? They always taste better than Charles's."
You let out a small laugh, shrugging as you turned back to your work.
"A little magical touch, maybe."
When Alice had told you to stay in Mondstadt for the time being, mentioning that someone should be there to keep tabs on things physically, you had accepted without thinking too much about it.
Mondstadt was...peaceful.
After the Traveller's help in resolving various incidents happening, there was almost nothing left in the city of freedom that required immediate attention. Even the usual disturbances had quieted down.
With the return of the Grandmaster, Mondstadt had never felt safer.
And it wasn't as if you could simply go out and deal with nearby monsters either. Apparently, someone had already been clearing out camps before you could even get to them. (and judging by the aftermath, they seemed to enjoy it far too much.)
Hence there was little else to do.
So what else could you do to entertain yourself but to experience the daily roles the citizens provide?
The cycle came easily to you. Your magic allowing you to blend in rather easily, people remembering you exactly as you appeared to them in that very moment, each version of you settling into their minds as something natural.
It has become a routine of yours.
However, Mondstadt, for all its charm, could only offer so many occupations to slip into—after a while, even the novelty of it began to fade.
As you cleaned a wine glass at Angel's Share, you could feel the Grandmaster's gaze on you. Despite what he had said earlier, it seemed even he was having difficulty believing his own conclusion.
For the first time in a long while, someone in Mondstadt was not playing along with the version of reality you had quietly arranged.
No wonder the Hexenzirkle spoke so highly of Varka at times. He could clearly break through some barrier of your magic.
A small spark of interest stirred in your chest.
"...So you're working at Cat's Tail again?"
Varka leaned against the counter of Cat's Tail, a drink in hand as he watched you move around behind it.
After his first encounter with you, he had started noticing a pattern—or rather, he told himself it was a pattern he was noticing on purpose.
The truth was that his eyes seemed to find you in Mondstadt far more often than coincidence should allow. At first, he had convinced himself it was caution. Your existence was, after all, unusual to him.
Someone who appeared in multiple places, in multiple roles, without anyone questioning it...that warranted attention.
A potential threat, perhaps. One that simply had not revealed itself yet.
But the longer he watched, the harder that explanation became to maintain.
Not only harmless, but competent in every role you took. Whether behind a bar, in a cathedral, or serving food at Good Hunter, everything you did carried the same ease.
Even children gravitated towards you without hesitation.
Klee had shown up more than once, proudly presenting drawings, and you had responded each time with genuine enthusiasm, as though it was the most important thing in the world.
And if Alice hadn't stopped Klee from hanging around you, then surely you must be safe.
Therefore, you must just be..
A very hardworking person who had taken up multiple jobs in Mondstadt—and somehow, everyone else had agreed to keep up with it.
"Whatever do you mean, Grandmaster?" your voice cut through his thoughts.
Varka blinked, returning to the present. You were looking at him now, head tilted slighlty, expression calm as ever.
"Oh?" he said, letting out a short laugh as he straightened slightly, "You're still keeping that up?"
He took another sip of his drink before settlinng down on the counter.
"I think I've figured you out."
"Really?" you asked, voice light.
"Yep!" Varka nodded, a little too confidently. "It's actually simpler than I thought."
He leaned forward slightly, lowering his voice as though sharing something important.
"You're just one hardworking citzen." he grinned. "And everyone just agreed not to mention your other jobs when you're working somewhere else, right? Like, I get it. People don't usually bring up other work in the middle of a shift. It's just..very committed of everyone to keep it consistent."
For a moment, there was silence.
Then you burst into laughter.
Varka blinked, straightening up again, "What? Did I get it wrong?"
You wiped a small tear from the corner of your eye, still smiling as you shook your head slightly.
"Oh, Varka.." You said softly, almost fondly. "Never stop being you."
Before he could respond, you picked up a few boxes from behind the counter and stepped out from your station, brushing past him as you moved towards the back.
"Hey—wait," he called after you, grabbing his drink as he went. "What does that mean?!"
But you didn't answer, only continuing down the corridor, humming a light, almost teasing tune as if the conversation had already ended in your favour.
He met you again when he was out exploring.
It seems this time, you were a knight, now dressed in the classic uniform belonging to the Knights of Favonius.
"Fancy meeting you here," Varka called out as he jogged up beside you, quickly matching your pace. "On patrol duty?" His gaze briefly swept over you, lingering for a moment longer on your face. "I don't think I've ever seen you as a knight before."
"Mhm..." You were only half-listening, eyes scanning the surrounding terrain.
In truth, Alice's message had been brief but clear—there had been an unusual concentration of Abyssal energy in the area, and you had come to investigate.
You hadn't expected Varka to be here as well.
"Are you exploring the area?" You asked, turning your head slightly towards him.
"Ah, yeah." Varka replied easily, hands loosely at his sides as he walked. "Just checking a few things. Got some intel that something might be going on around here."
Had Alice alerted him as well?
You exhaled softly, shaking your head. That woman was definitely scheming something. She knew you were more than capable of handling Abyssal disturbances alone—sending Varka as well meant she wasn't concerned about the threat.
She was interested in something else entirely.
"What's wrong?" Varka's voice pulled you back.
"H—Oof-!" your thoughts cut off sharply as you bumped into something solid in front of you.
A hand caught your waist almost immediately, steadying you before you could stumble back.
When did he get infront of you?
"Woah," Varka said, his grip careful, "What's got you so lost in thought?"
You looked up, and only then did you fully register how close he was.
Varka was already looking at you, concern evident in his expression, his attention entirely fixed on you as if the surroundings didn't matter as much anymore. For a brief second, your focus slipped and warmth rose faintly to your face.
"Nothing, nothing." you said quickly, pulling away and letting out a small cough as you turned forward again, picking up your pace.
The attempt at normalcy lasted only a few steps.
The air ahead of you shifted.
It wasn't subtly. The space in front of the path warped unnaturally, as though something had torn through the boundary and before you could fully react, purple vines snapped out from the portal, coiling around your wrists and ankles, yanking you forward with violent force.
The suddenness stole even your voice.
Your body moved on instinct, magic gathering at your fingertips to sever the bindings without hesitation—annoyance flaring sharper than alarm at how easily you had been caught off guard.
But before you could act, something cut through the air beside you with overwhelming force.
Steel cleaved through the vines in a single, decisive motion, and the restraints loosened instantly as the entire construct fractured under the impact. In the same movement, a strong arm hooked around you again, pulling you cleanly out of reach.
This time, the motion carried you fully against his torse.
You blinked once, adjusting to the sudden change in position. Your hands instinctively pressed against his chest for balance, and only then did you register just how solid he actually was—how the impact hadn’t shifted him in the slightest.
“Are you alright?!” Varka asked immediately, already scanning you for injuries. His grip was steady but careful, his focus entirely on you rather than the fading remains of the trap. “Any injuries anywhere?”
“...” You could only nod, your eyes lingering a second too long on his arm where it flexed as he adjusted his stance.
Maybe you could play as a damsel in distress a little longer.
The portal had long since collapsed behind the two of you, leaving only the unfamiliar stretch of land ahead and the quiet awareness that there was no immediate way back. Whatever had dragged you in had not left a clear exit, which meant the only option now was to move forward and find one.
As you walked through the dim terrain, Varka stayed close—close enough that it was no longer subtle. His presence remained slightly angled between you and the surrounding space, as though he had quietly decided that if anything else tried to appear, it would have to go through him first.
His gaze shifted briefly, taking in your equipment with a faint crease of confusion.
Varka nodded once, as if it should have been obvious. His eyes flicked down toward your belt again, where a weapon would normally sit if you were truly on duty as a knight. “Your sword,” he repeated, more pointedly this time. “Don’t tell me you were on patrol without it.”
“Oh…” you said slowly, as if searching for an answer that sounded remotely normal. “I… forgot?”
Even you could hear how unconvincing that was.
Varka stopped walking for half a step before continuing again, though his expression had shifted into something more serious. Not angry, but unmistakably disapproving in the way someone in charge of too many reckless recruits eventually becomes.
“[Name],” he said, your name carrying a weight of habit and command, “as a knight, you should always be prepared.”
“You’re lucky I was here,” he continued, tone firm. “Who knows what would have happened if you were alone—without your sword, no less.”
You hummed softly under your breath, falling back into step beside him as your hands rested loosely at your sides.
“…Mm,” you responded, deliberately mild. “That would’ve been unfortunate.”
Varka didn’t look entirely convinced by your lack of concern, but he didn’t push further either. Instead, he simply exhaled through his nose, as though silently accepting that you were one of those knights—reckless in a way that somehow still managed to work out in the end.
You let out a quiet chuckle, following after him as the two of you progressed further into the area. Varka cleared each wave of monsters with practiced efficiency, his claymore moving with the kind of ease that came from years of experience.
At the same time, he made sure to keep you positioned safely behind him.
Not that you weren’t helping.
Just subtly adjusting things here and there, unseen currents of magic bending outcomes ever so slightly in your favor as you watched him work. It was almost entertaining, the way he cleared each wave with such straightforward efficiency, completely unaware that the battlefield itself had already been tilted.
“Huh,” Varka said after the last enemy fell, sheathing his claymore and glancing around with a slight tilt of his head. “That’s strange. I usually clear these fast, but this felt… smoother somehow.”
Before the two of you could progress any further, a faint ringing sound cut through the air.
A small Dodoco-like device sat nearby, vibrating lightly as if waiting to be answered. Varka instinctively stepped forward, but you reached it first, tapping it lightly.
“Hello, hello?” came a bright, unmistakably amused voice.
“Oh, wonderful,” she continued without waiting. “It seems my two very reliable friends have cleared the area quite nicely.”
“Ah yeah..we’re just trying to find a way out.” Varka scratched the back of his neck, looking around. “Say, do you know anything about this place Alice?”
“Oho? But I’m sure my fellow member here could have easily teleported you two out,” Alice said lightly, “right, [Name]?”
“Wha—fellow member?” Varka’s head snapped toward you immediately.
You didn’t look surprised at all. If anything, your expression leaned more toward mild resignation, like this was exactly what you expected from Alice.
“I knew you were up to something,” you said, frowning slightly as you poked the Dodoco. “You really can’t help yourself, can you?”
“Oops!” Alice chirped. “Well, Barbie and I just thought we’d help our dear Grandmaster a little. After all, who wouldn’t want to play matchmaker with him?” The device bounced slightly, as if delighted with itself.
“Matchmaker?” you repeated, turning your head slowly toward Varka.
Then, far too casually, he looked away and gave a small whistle as though suddenly fascinated by absolutely nothing in particular.
“Why yes!” Alice continued happily, entirely unbothered. “After noticing what—or who has been keeping the Grandmaster so distracted, I simply had to try! Well then, I’ll leave you two to it!” The Dodoco gave one last cheerful bounce before disappearing in a soft burst of smoke.
For a moment, neither of you spoke.
Then Varka cleared his throat.
“So…” he said, slower now, finally looking at you again. “You’re a Hexenzirkel witch.”
You paused for a moment, then added with a small sigh, as though genuinely reflecting on something lost, “There goes my entertainment in watching you figure things out.”
The teasing remark was supposed to be harmless.
Instead, Varka's expression changed almost immediately.
Before he fully thought it through, he stepped forward and reached for your wrist.
The movement wasn't forceful. If anything, it felt strangely instinctive, like he had reacted before his mind had caught up. The moment his fingers closed around your wrist, he seemed to realize what he'd done—and yet he didn’t let go, only loosening his hold.
The words came out quieter than expected.
Varka exhaled slowly through his nose, his gaze dropping for a moment before returning to you. There was something unguarded in it now, something that hadn’t been there a second ago.
"I'm still me, you know.." he mumbled, a faint crease now between his brows.
"I found out one thing about you. That's all. It doesn't suddenly mean I've got you completely figured out."
His thumb shifted unconsciously against your wrist before stilling when he realised what he was doing.
"If anything, I think I've got more questions now than I did before."
Varka let out a short laugh, shaking his head like he couldn’t quite believe it himself either.
“I mean, come on! One moment I think you’re a knight who somehow forgot her sword, and the next Alice is telling me you’re with the Hexenzirkel and someone who could’ve teleported us out of here whenever you wanted.”
The tension in his shoulders eased slightly as he spoke, some of his usual warmth returning. “I’m still trying to process that.”
You glanced away briefly, hiding the amusement that threatened to surface. “Sounds like a skill issue.”
The answer came so quickly that it caught you off guard and a chuckle escaped before you could stop it.
Varka's smile widened at the sound, though it faded into something quieter a moment later. His gaze dropped once more to where he still held your wrist.
"Ah but…” He hesitated, suddenly looking far less certain than usual. “If all of this bothers you—the matchmaking thing, I mean…”
For the first time since meeting him, he looked genuinely unsure of himself.
"I don't want to come off too strong.." Varka said softly, his free hand moving to rub his neck. "After spending so long watching you and trying to figure you out, I guess I..." He paused, a faint look of self-consciousness crossing his face. "I found myself looking forward to finding out more about you."
The admission hung in the air between you.
A quiet laugh escaped him as he shook his head.
"Honestly, finding out you're a part of the Hexenzirkel just means I've got even more things left to learn."
His gaze met yours again.
“So don't go deciding I'm boring now."
A familiar grin finally returned, softer than the easy, carefree smiles he usually wore but no less genuine. His fingers slipped from your wrist to lace gently through yours, holding your hand as though it already belonged there. Then he lifted it, his eyes never leaving yours, and brushed a lingering kiss across your knuckles.
"Aftr all, I haven't even had the chance to impress you properly yet, [Name]."
notes: aaaaa i kinda had to rush the ending a little so hopefully it's not too wonky. But yay i finally finished it!! witch x knight is such a fun troupe tbh
edit: rewrote a few things because i wasn't really satisfied with the way the ending was written..🙏
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