interlude

      Lennon paused for outside Seth’s door, fingers toying absentmindedly with the hem of her shirt. She had been standing there silently for longer than she’d intended, heart beating an uneven rhythm against her ribcage, fist extending toward the door and then back toward her side without ever making contact. It’s not too late to leave, she reminded herself, lip pulling beneath her bottom teeth. She had never meant to tell him the truth, had meant to fade quietly into the background until she disappeared entirely. His absence had taken root in the hollow of her stomach, uncomfortable and unavoidable, but Lennon had long ago determined it was a weight she could– would have to– live with. Still, something had shifted the other night. Hope, or something dangerously close to it, twisted down inside of her like a seed thinking about growing, and before she could talk herself out of it she raised a fist and rapped it quietly against his door. A small grin to match his lightened her features as she entered the room. “Easily,” she agreed. “And I’ve heard you say a lot of stupid things in your life. Like the time I fucking slipped on a banana peel in the tenth grade and you made Mario Kart jokes for the rest of the month.” Dark tresses fell against her cheeks in an attempt to hide the stupid grin that spread across her lips at his joke. The girl had grown so used to the wall Seth had built between them, to the anger and avoidance and silence. She’d never admit it, but she would’ve gladly given up all the Taco Bell in the world just to hear him laugh with her again. “I’ll forgive it, though. But only because you bought the food and I’ve literally never been so hungry in my life.” Grabbing one from the box, she made herself comfortable against the end of his bed, body tucked into the corner. So much had changed since she’d last been alone with him, but maybe if she pretended that nothing had she could will away her nerves. She glanced around the room, taking it in, before her gaze landed on his Xbox. “Bet I could still kick your ass with that.” She nodded her chin toward the machine. Looking up at him through her lashes, Lennon wondered if it were too late to leave, or to shrink into his covers and never come back, or to erase the past year so that none of it had ever happened in the first place. “But, uh, right. Not the reason I’m here. Maybe later, though.” 

      “I’m a firm believer in the fact that Mario Kart jokes should be made often, especially if you slip on a banana peel or get hit by a red shell. The odds of the last one happening are kinda slim, though.” he said, a small chuckle following his words. He followed her example and grabbed a taco, taking a seat at his desk but positioning his chair so he was still facing her. He set the food down on his desk, realizing he wasn’t even the slightest bit hungry. Her being here was making him so nervous that his appetite had flown out the door the moment she knocked on it though. Luckily though, he’d always been one that’s able to mask what he’s really feeling and covered his nervousness well. Seth looked over at his Xbox, before scrunching up his nose. “What do you mean still? You never could kick my ass. And if you could, it was because I was letting you win.” he said, leaning back in his chair with a smirk on his face. “Yeah, what did you need to talk to me about?”