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All I've ever known is how to hold my own / But now I wanna hold you too / You take me in your arms / And suddenly there's sunlight all around me / Everything bright and warm / And shining like it never did before / And for a moment I forget / Just how dark and cold it gets. —Hadestown, West End
content: a rainy day, broken car, and an invite walk into a bar.
wc: 2.9k
a/n: sorry for the delay, i’ve been mourning my very close personal friend Jacaerys Velaryon, Prince of Dragonstone and Rightful Heir to the Iron Throne, and lowk watching that show is draining inspo. I lowk was supposed to write the dinner scene, but i dont want to. maybe another time x.
fast as you can | all I ask of you
It had been a month or so since you abandoned the day shift, much to Samira's disappointment, not that she was surprised. If there was one thing Samira knew about you, it was that you were stubborn enough to walk straight into a burning building without hesitation, but when it came to your emotions… Well, you would always rearrange your entire life around before admitting something hurt.
And well …case in point.
Your decision came within the first few days of the conversation outside the bay; the awkward tension between you and Robby had become almost impossible to ignore. The Pitt was already a place where people noticed everything, and the obvious distance between you had become the new gossip. So, of course, they noticed.
Princess and Perlah were the first to start pestering you, cornering you whenever you were alone for barely more than a second.
"So," Princess had said one morning, leaning against the counter while pretending to organize supplies. "Are you ever gonna talk about why you and Robby are acting like divorcees?"
You nearly spit your coffee onto their iPad before you, defensively saying. "We are not acting like that!"
"Right…" Perlahh replied from beside Princess, already grinning. "It's just that—"
"Goodbye, Princess. Perlah." You said, rolling your eyes as you sped away.
Unfortunately for you, the entire department seemed to share their curiosity, and at some point,t you discovered the betting board. It happened by pure circumstance; you assumed that it was supposed to be hidden from you and Robby because it was the first time you had ever seen it, and it was ridiculously full of guesses. You could only read a few before Ahmad had stepped in the way: secret relationship, argument (robby's fault), smth else. So it's safe to say you switched as soon as possible.
The hospital was different at night compared to the many degrees of incidents that came in during the day; it was more subdued…if you could even say that. A lot of it was just normal drunk/high kids getting into accidents, maybe a car crash here and there, children whose fever spiked, and more. The night shift was a good change of pace. You've got to spend more time with Shen and Parker. And…most importantly, you stopped seeing him (for the most part). There was still a shift change, but it was easy to avoid him. You knew he always came in at 7:10 on the dot, so you would hide away, pretending to hand off patients to Samira, until he stopped talking to Robby. And at night, you would always pick up two or three Dunkin' lattes for your friends, so naturally, you would miss his exit.
And for the most part, it truly did work, except that you still thought about him more than you wanted to, but it was hard not to. There were moments when something ridiculous happened in the department, and your first instinct was still that he would find this funny. Other times, after a difficult patient outcome, you would catch yourself wondering what he would say because he always seemed to know how to make you feel better. It was hard, but this is life, and you weren't going to let a man play with your feelings.
But the universe liked to play tricks on people, which was why, a month later, you were standing in the parking garage at seven in the morning during a storm, turning your key over and over again in your piece-of-shit car. Unfortunately, the only response you would get was a loud whirring sound.
You sighed, resting your forehead against the wheel. "Of-fucking-course. You have got to be joe king"
It was already a long shift; your feet were hurting, and you just really…really wanted to go home. This was truly the last thing you needed. You tried again, hoping that it would miraculously pull through,h only for it to give another miserable whine.
Rain battered against the concrete openings of the parking garage, and sheets of water would blow sideways every time the wind picked up. The storm had rolled in sometime a few hours ago, and despite the rising sun, the sky was still a nasty shade of grey. You dropped your head back against the seat, staring into the rain before pushing open the door and climbing out into the damp morning air.
This weather was perfect for an old movie and being curled up in bed, yet you were being forced to suffer. You walked around to the front of the car, popping open the hood of your car.
You didn't know what you were even looking for. What even caused a car to make that stupid sound? Where was your father when you needed him? Maybe you should have moved with your parents…
"Ugh." You slam the hood down. What could you even do? There was always calling a tow truck, but at seven in the morning, even though the thought of sitting around for one almost made you want to cry. Your apartment wasn't exactly within walking distance either, and judging by the rain, it would've only been a longer walk.
You let out another sigh, rubbing both hands over your face before lifting the hood as though the engine could have fixed itself.
"Come on," You mutter, "Do anything literally."
You stared down into the engine bay, knowing you could only recognize three exact things: the battery, the windshield washer cap, and how potentially bad this could be for your wallet.
From somewhere behind you, a low rumble of an engine echoed through the garage, growing louder as a dark pickup rounded the corner onto your level. You barely glanced up at first, until the truck started slowing to a stop when it reached you.
You looked over just in time to see the driver's window slide down. The universe was really playing some huge prank on you. Robby looked at you from behind the wheel, one hand resting on the steering wheel, the other draped over the open window. His hair was slightly damp from the rain, and there were the ever-present shadows beneath his eyes.
"…Car trouble?"
No, Robby, you just really liked observing the engine of your car. You could feel your eye twitch, whether from exhaustion or an already growing irritation, you did not know.
"Haha, yeah." You tucked a stray hair behind your ear as you gave a stiff nod.
He didn't respond as he pulled into the parking spot next to you, shifting the car into park.
"What are you doing?" you asked, watching as he reached for the door handle.
"Taking a look."
"You don't have to—" The rest of your sentence died out as he climbed out anyway, grabbing his travel cup from the center console before nudging the door shut.
"Mind if I?" he asked, nodding toward the engine.
Your first instinct was to tell him no. You'd already spent an entire month carefully avoiding him; accepting his help felt…like you were about to undo all that work. What other option did you really have? "Be my guest, Robby."
He leaned over the open hood, his brow furrowing almost immediately as he studied the engine. You watch him fiddle with a few hoses before moving to the battery, giving one of the cables an experimental tug. He reached farther in, almost disappearing entirely beneath the hood.
For several minutes, the only sounds were the rain pounding against the roof and the occasional metal click as he adjusted something.
"You can tell me if it's already dead," you said after a while. "I'm a big girl, I can take either."
A month ago, this would've been normal. You teasing him the entire time, Robby's occasional sarcastic reply, and whatever topic either of you could muster up. Now, it just felt empty.
After another minute, he finally stood up, "Can you try starting it?"
You nod, slipping back into the driver's seat and turning the key. The engine gave the same miserable whir before quieting. When you climbed back out, he was already rubbing the back of his neck with a thoughtful look.
"Well?"
"I've got good news and bad news." You motion for him to continue. "The good news is that I think I know what's wrong."
"And the bad?"
He rests his hands on the edge of the car. "It's not something we're fixing here."
You could feel your shoulders sag, "Figures."
Robby gave a small nod, glancing back into the engine one last time before carefully lowering the hood until it latched shut.
"It sounds like your starter's gone," he explained. "Or it's on its way out. Battery seems fine, and I'm not hearing anything that makes me think it's the alternator."
"And…"
"So," Robby translated, his lips quirked up in that stupid way, "you're going to need a mechanic."
You let out a long, defeated groan, tipping your head back slightly. "Fantastic."
"At least it's fixable"
"I know." You rub your eyes, "Just very impeccable timing."
He nods, "Good for you, though. I know a guy who can help."
"…You do?" Your eyebrows raise in slight disbelief.
"I know how to replace a starter."
You hesitate for a moment, "…I can just pay a mechanic, Robby…you don't have to do this for me.:
"You can," he agreed. "Or you can save yourself a few hundred dollars."
"You'd really fix it?"
Robby shrugged like it wasn't a big deal. "It'll only take an afternoon."
You looked back at your car, drawing your lip between your teeth. It was difficult to argue with free, but still it didn't feel right. "I can't let you do that, it's fine really."
"Consider it an IOU."
You couldn't argue with that, so you just nodded. "…Thank you, Robby."
"Now," he said, reaching for his truck keys, "let's get you home."
"I'll just call an Uber."
He glanced toward the open side of the garage where the rain was still falling in relentless sheets. "You'll be waiting forever."
"I'll be alright, it'll probably be like 15 minutes only." You say, already moving to the passenger side of your car to retrieve your bag.
He calls your name, "You've been up all night."
"I can survive a little longer."
"No. I'm driving you," he said, already moving back to his truck and opening the passenger door. "You're tired, it's pouring, and I'm not letting you stand out here arguing with me in the middle of a storm. Get in the car."
You glance back at the hospital, "You have to take over for Abbot."
"He won't mind."
"Robby… You really don't have to. I don't like being a burden."
Something softened in his face. "You never have been."
"Alright." Your resolve faltered, and something in you really wanted to believe him. You rounded your car before sliding into the passenger seat. Robby closed the door behind you with a heavy thud, immediately muffling the storm outside until the split second when he got in.
Neither of you spoke as he pulled out of the parking garage. The windshield wipers swept steadily across the glass, matching the pace of the rain. For several moments, neither of you spoke as he merged onto the street.
The car smelled faintly of coffee and cedarwood with a hint of eucalyptus…maybe even spearmint, and something about it made your eyes feel heavier as you stared out into the rain.
"So…" He glances over at you, "How've you been?"
You jerk slightly, straightening back in your seat as you turn to look back at him. "Oh…I've been okay, nothing new to be honest."
Robby gives an affirmative hum, pursing his lips as his grip tightens slightly on the wheel. "And night shift?"
"I enjoy it, it's different." You say, watching as he seems to stiffen in his seat.
"Do you plan on staying longer?" He pushes on, "I…We miss you on the day shift. Langdon's getting lonely without you."
Your face scrunches up, a dry laugh escaping you, "I'm sure he is."
Robby's thumb tapped once against the steering wheel before he looked back at the road. Only the sound of the heater and the rain hitting the car filled the silence between you.
"You know what I mean," he said eventually
"Do I, Robby?"
His jaw shifted slightly. "You've been avoiding days."
"I switched shifts."
"You switched because of me."
Well…yes, but there was absolutely no way you were going to admit it. You looked out the window instead, watching familiar streets slide past. "Does it matter?"
"It matters to me."
You glanced back at him before staring down at the floor. His expression hadn't changed, but something was lying underneath it that you couldn't put your finger on.
"I just…" He shook his head. "I kept coming into work expecting to see you. And when you weren't there…" Robby swallowed. "It sucked."
Neither of you spoke after that, but it was painfully obvious that both of you had something you wanted to say.
It took another 15 minutes until he turned into your neighborhood,d and the storm had finally slowed into a steady downpour.
"You can just pull in over there," you said quietly, pointing toward your building.
Robby nodded, easing the truck into an empty visitor spot, shifting the gear into park. The engine continued to hum beneath you as the two of you kinda just eyed each other.
The windshield wipers swept back and forth a few more times before you decided to unclip your seatbelt. "…Thank you for the ride…and my car."
"You don't have to thank me."
"I do."
"You really don't."
You shake your head, offering him a small smile as your hand finds the door handle. As soon as you started to pull at it, Robby called your name.
"Wait…" He was staring straight ahead, jaw tight enough that you could actually see the muscle twitch beneath his cheek. His hands were still gripping the steering wheel as you turned to face him. He let out a slow breath, "I've started this conversation probably…" His thumb rubbed against the leather of the steering wheel, "…probably a hundred times."
"And?"
"And I still don't know how to say it."
Your brows furrowed as you leaned back in your seat. "Just say it."
"I—" Robby drags his hand down his face before letting it fall to his lap. "I owe you an apology."
He finally looked over at you, and for the first time in weeks, he didn't seem composed.
"…Robby."
"No." He shook his head. "Let me finish before I lose my nerve."
"That night outside the ambulance bay..." His eyes drifted toward the windshield,d where rain continued to crawl down the glass. "Instead of acting like an adult..." Robby continued, "...I panicked."
"You're so… you and I…don't deserve to be a part of your life. You're younger than me and absolutely radiant. I just don't understand why you would want to be with some old man who barely has a life. I thought it would be better to just… step away.
A part of you wanted to interrupt, but you could tell he still had more to say.
"I kept thinking if I gave it enough time, it'd get less awkward." He smiled bitterly. "Turns out ignoring the woman you like isn't actually a great strategy…"
Despite yourself, the corner of your mouth twitched as you tilted your head slightly, "Who would've thought?"
He let out a slight chuckle before shaking his head, "All this to say, I owe you a major apology. I'm sorry and…" Robby rubbed his neck, suddenly looking far more anxious than he had been apologizing. "If you would have me—if your answer's no, I'll understand— but…"
"God, Robby. Spit it out already." Your pulse was loud enough that you were sure he could hear it.
"I would like to take you out to dinner." He finally met your eyes, his cheeks turning pink as he stared you down.
Your lips parted slightly as he continued to ramble. "I mean, it doesn't have to be fancy or anything. We could go to Ritual House or Porch. Or you could choose—"
"Michael!" you interrupt, "I'll go to dinner with you."
Robby simply stared at you, as though he hadn't quite processed the words that had just come out of your mouth. His cheeks seemed to redden even more, and you had to fight to hold in a giggle. "…Okay?"
"Okay?"
A grin spread slowly across his face, genuine and unguarded. "I just... wasn't expecting you to say yes so fast."
"I wanted you to choose me."
Robby's expression softened into something so unbearably relieved that it made your chest ache. "I've been choosing you," he admitted quietly. "I was just too much of an idiot to let you know."
You laughed through the sudden sting behind your eyes.
"Yeah," you sniffed. "You kind of were."
"I know."
You moved to say something else when his phone started ringing. He jolted, his hands patting his jacket pockets before he remembered that his phone was shoved into his back pocket. "Shit, it's Abbot. I've got to go back."
You let out a huff of laughter before finally opening the cardoor. "Goodnight, Robby." You pause, your lip quirking up in thought, "Or Good Morning? Have a good day at work."
summary: despite you and robby agreeing to keep your strictly physical relationship under wraps, you self-combust when your attending keeps calling you 'sweetheart'.
wc. 1k
notes.this is completely based off my lab partner calling me 'sweetheart' and me nearly breaking a vial. enjoy :)
Sweetheart. Sweetheart. Thanks, sweetheart.
It replays in your head like a cursed audio loop as you meander your way through the Pitt. You stay focused but your mind circles back to it. Sweetheart.
The nickname (petname? Term of endearment? The fucking key to the unraveling of your psyche?) continues to echo around your head that Dana mistakes your distracted countenance for exhaustion and hustles you to the break room with a protein bar in hand. You take the few minutes of reprieve in hopes to recalibrate your headspace, prep yourself for the remaining hours of your shift, but instead you chew on that small little instance that rocks the world beneath your feet instead.
Dr. Robby had called you sweetheart.
It's not the first time he's called you anything by your name, given the fact that the two of you have been sleeping together by the time your final year of residency kicked off a few months ago. But the two of you have been detached and professional outside of the bedroom, managing to find time even when you've been moved over to the night shift to avoid any suspicion.
Covering a double means seeing Robby and you didn't realize how it rearranges the neat order of your life to see him in daylight after your midnight trysts.
"Hey."
Speak of the devil—
"Hi," you wave your half eaten protein bar, already leaning forward to get to your feet from where you've been hiding in the break room. "Did you need me for something?"
He shakes his head, a warm hand pressing on your shoulder to sit you back down while he remains standing. The distance, the way your head tilts up to meet his gaze, makes his head shortcircuit. The image flickers and the hospital is replaced with his bedroom, your chair replaced with his floor as he gazes down at you—
He blinks and the hospital shifts back into view. "No, Dana told me you were in here takin' a breather. You okay?"
You nod and take another chomp of your bar. "Yeah, she said I got a little spacey. Oh, the woes of a double."
A chuckle rumbles through his chest as he absentmindedly tucks a strand of your hair behind your ear. It's done casually, like he didn't even think about what he's doing. Second nature. "Make sure you get some sleep tonight, sweetheart. Did you need a ride?"
"I—" Your lashes flutter, mouth parting slightly in shock. "Um. Yeah. Yes, please."
Something settles in his chest at your easy compliance. "Good. Meet me at the ambulance bay after handoffs then."
The door shuts behind him when he leaves you but you're still staring at the door in utter befuddlement. When did Dr. Robby get so… boyfriend?
—
The rest of the shift goes by smoothly, enough traumas (and even a degloved foot) to keep your mind on the fact that the attending you've been fucking has suddenly taken on the boyfriend mantle. It's disarming to say the least, garnering attention from the other day shift residents and nosy nurses whenever Robby hovers close enough to touch.
"Sweetheart, go finish charting," he interrupts your conversation with McKay, steering you away from chairs where you've been headed to help triage. "Your shift's almost over and you've been dead on your feet."
Exhaustion has you nodding in easy agreement as the older woman enlists Joy instead to help out but the familiar petname zaps you awake the moment you settle behind the computer.
Beside you, wheels scrape against linoleum floors and Trinity is immediately hissing in your ear in absolute giddy— "'Sweetheart'?"
You wince and shove her shoulder to push her off before glancing up to see Princess and Perlah nowhere to be seen. "Shut up."
"Since when did you and Dr. Grumpy make things official?"
The cursor blinks in front of you as you try to recall your last patient. "We didn't. And stop talking so loud—!"
"Please— the entire department know you two have been messing around, I just didn't think he's been promoted to boyfriend—"
"Who got promoted to boyfriend?"
Your stomach drops and you peek over your shoulder to see the man in question, holding his bag and yours. Trinity's grin is downright villainous as she rises from her chair to make her exit. "Nothing, Dr. Robby. Have a good night, you two."
Your fingers fly across the screen to finish and submit before getting to your feet. When you reach up to grab your bag, he angles his shoulder away to stop you. "Dr. Robby—"
"No, I got it. Come on, I took the car with me today."
You trail behind him in slight apprehension but upon feeling the curious looks from incoming night shift (as well as Dr. Abbot's amused stare), you scurry faster to walk beside Robby.
"Did I do something?" you blurt out before the two of you can get too far.
Robby pauses, chuckles and gives you a confused but easy smile. "No…? Do you think you're in trouble, sweetheart?"
"That!" You jab a finger up at his lips, feeling the double hit you all at once; your brain to mouth filter is non-existent now. "Sweetheart! You don't call me that, you don't make me take breaks during a busy shift, you fuck me 'til I cry and give me coffee before I leave. Did I miss something important?"
His smile falls and dread creeps in. You ruined it now. "I… didn't realize it wasn't as smooth as a transition as I thought."
"What?"
He sets down the bags to hold you gently by the shoulders, slightly lowering himself to meet your eyes. The simple action makes something warm twist happily in your stomach. "I thought I could've started hinting at wanting more instead of just scaring you off by asking you out on a date."
"… what?"
Robby frowns now and he gently holds your cheek. His gaze is clinical and you realize he's trying to diagnose whatever the hell's wrong with you and not the fact that he's flipped your world upside down. "Did you hit your head—"
"No! I'm fine, I just— I didn't expect you to… want more." You shrug, seeking out this newfound type of attention. "Your seven-week threshold for dating isn't exactly a secret. In fact, I was expecting you to start ghosting me."
A wry chuckle escapes him. "Sweetheart. We've been fooling around for nine weeks now."
"… oh."
"Mhm. So, you ready to head home and get some sleep?"
During your shifts at Ptmc. More than likely, your hair was always up. A ponytail, a messy bun, a claw clip. Something to keep it back. He saw the wave pattern, sure. But he underestimated it entirely.
You'd come in off shift during the mass shooting. Hell, he saw it. Everyone did.
Your hair was natural, your clothes were tousled from obviously running here but your hair was a mix of waves and ringlets. Slightly frizzy. But thats what made them so beautiful, at least to him.
That day, youd shoved it up and saved so many patients with him.
It blossomed from there. He spoke to you more often, asked you to dinner. He just thought you were gorgeous. He almost protested when your hair was straight during your first date. But he held back.
Then you started dating. Around two months or so into it. You started to realise. When you got out the shower, your hair fell into its natural pattern.
You believed men only liked straight hair, so thats what you did. But he hated it. I mean, you'd look gorgeous in a trash bag to him but thats beside the point.
He loves your curls because there what makes you, you.
He protested when he saw you pick up the hairdryer and brush. His brown eyes silently pleading you.
"Wear it curly."
He'd tried to say as naturally as possible but the silent yearning in his eyes totally gave him away. Your brows furrowed before complying.
It'd been around thirty minutes, he was lounging on the couch. His eyes actually widened and he stood to walk towards you.
He could fall to his knees before you. Its perfect.
Its got character, slight frizz to them, some arent formed into proper curls.
As if he'd care anyway. He smiles before immdiately kissing your forehead.
"You look gorgeous."
He murmurs softly. Nothing but tender love in his voice. You pout then.
"I hate it."
You mutter, your hand raising to scrunch them up in hopes to get rid of the frizz. He pulls away to look at you and sees the genuine distaste.
So, he spends that entire morning telling you how beautiful it is. Pushing it to the side when he kisses your neck. His hand absently stroking over it, not through it when you were sat with him.
However, his favourite thing to do was help you do it. He'd help you scrunch the back of your hair. An amused glimmer in his eyes. Almost proud.
Even when you brushed through it before you showered and it literally grew three times. He laughed, and you did too. Sheepishly hiding your face beneath the frizzy locks. Which worked due to the frizz. Like curtains.
"Lend me some of your hair."
He'd tease, and you'd just roll your eyes at him. His eyes crinkling with his grin.
Much to his effort, you fell back in love with it. Only because he liked it so much and I believe his words were:
"It makes you like some kind of goddess."
Those were the words he muttered when he saw how it spread across the pillows when you were beneath him. Nothing but worship in those brown eyes.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
dr. robby x exwife!reader ; you stop by the ER before leaving for a night out with your friends. a little glimpse of how their domestic life is looking lately / would u believe me if I say this is one of the first pieces I wrote for this series? it's one of my faves as well :) i hope u like it <3
warnings: jack is messing with robby / smuttish ?
words: 1k
don’t forget to check the masterlist for more toxic behavior content
You were hoping to find him at his desk. As you hit the ground-floor button, backpack slung over your shoulder, you felt a surge of confidence in your going-out outfit and matching heels. You had hoped he would be there to see you.
Leaning against the counter beside his computer, you gave him enough time to run his eyes up and down your body.
“Wow,” he said, but his voice remained flat.
“I’m leaving for the day.”
“I can see that.” He held your gaze a second too long before returning to his screen, his fingers resuming their rhythm on the keys.
You walked behind him, placing your hands on his shoulders to work out the tension in his muscles. Robby released a sharp exhale at the pressure. An old habit you kept. It soothed both of you.
“The kids are with my parents. Please pick them up before nine; otherwise, they’ll be asleep and it will be a mess.”
“I know. I will.”
“No sugar,” you added, slipping into your usual lecture. “And no TV.”
“Got it.”
“Do you work tomorrow?” You pushed slightly forward to look down at him.
He looked up over the rim of his glasses. “No.”
“Neither do I. Let me know when is a good time to pick them up.”
His hand reached up to cover yours. “Maybe we can do something together?”
You nodded. It was easy, and it was normal. You were still a family, after all. Robby was a great father, and co-parenting meant you were in this for the long run. Both of you.
“There's my man! Get her back, you idiot!” Jack all but howled from the entrance of the Pitt.
You laughed, shaking your head at him. Jack walked to the counter, leaning his forearms across the surface behind Robby’s monitor.
“Well, look at you, darling. You look great.”
You muttered a hushed “thanks,” continuing to knead Robby’s shoulders as he sifted through his email.
“Where are you guys going?”
Robby signaled you with a finger.
“Just me. Friday night out with the girls,” you said with a smile.
Jack’s mouth dropped open. “Just you?”
“Yep.” You popped the P.
“Well, looking like that, you aren’t paying for a single drink tonight. That’s for sure.” He flashed his trademark smirk.
You sighed. “Your mouth to God’s ears.”
Robby scoffed, shaking his head in amusement.
“Aren’t you going to do anything about that, man? That’s your wife.”
“Ex,” Robby said, not looking up from his typing.
“Oh, so you’re single?” Jack teased you.
Robby merely raised a hand and flipped him the middle finger.
“I should get going.” You leaned down and pressed a kiss to Robby’s cheek. “If you need me, please call. I promise I’ll be sober enough. If they can’t sleep, call me and I’ll be there, alright?” You shifted to lean your hip against the desk.
Robby stood, his hand rising automatically to cup your cheek. “We’ll be okay. Have fun.” He pressed a soft kiss to your forehead.
Seeing him like this still made your knees weak. In your heels, you were closer than usual—dangerously close—and you could smell his cologne. You could have easily pushed forward to reclaim his lips.
“Just kiss her, man,” Jack called out.
You cackled, finally turning away. Waving your goodbyes to the crew, you headed for the exit.
“Come on, dude. You can’t be cool with this. She could meet someone,” you heard Jack insisting behind you as the click of your heels echoed through the ER.
“We are divorced, Jack. Mind your own business.” Robby said to put an end to it.
And it wasn't because he wasn't jealous.
He knew there was a chance you could meet someone.
But he also knew you would most likely call him in the middle of the night, to ask about the kids, and he’d say they’re asleep, and you’d ask about him, and he’d say he is awake, and you’d ask if you could come over, and he’d say yes.
And he’d let you see the kids fast asleep in their rooms, and he’d offer a glass of wine, and you’d say yes, but you’d end up making out on the counter instead.
And he’d take you to bed, and he’d kiss every single piece of your skin he could, and he’d get to taste you again, and if he was lucky, to even have your mouth on him; and he’d fuck you and he’d whisper “nobody else can fill you like I do” in your ear as he pushed, and pushed, and pushed.
And you’d close your eyes and shake your head, and you’d bite his neck, and then mumble “harder” and he’d comply and slip a finger inside your mouth to stop you from making any noise, and he’d whisper “we don’t want to wake them up, baby” as he guided you through the edges of pleasure.
And you’d sleep tangled to him, and his hands would search for your waist in his sleep. And you’d wake up in the morning, and after kissing him good morning you’d take your things and leave before the kids woke up, because you don’t want them to be confused about you and their father’s relationship.
Because you are, at the end of the day, divorced.
You looked back and sent Robby a wink before leaving the ER. A tease, a fleeting flirt, an inside joke, a silent promise that screamed see you later.
smutty blurb request for agegap robby where he likes to end the day with you riding his thigh/dry humping until you make a mess on his lap so he can clean you up before bed? 😵💫
blurb requests are open — ♡
oh sweet nonnie...... this was so much fun to write omfg.
quick warning: excessive daddy kink and indulgent uses of petnames!
robby likes to think he's doing better now, finding new routines to have a healthier work-life balance. he doesn't stay later than his alotted shift and he's got something else to help him destress once he gets home.
you.
"fuck, daddy—!" you squeal as your legs slot around his thigh, your panty-clad clit rubbing against the firm muscle beneath you. robby grunts as you push his shoulders back against the headboard from your eagerness. you're like a bunny on his lap, young and overeager in the way you chase your pleasure like this.
"feels good, princess?"
his tone is condescending, dark eyes glimmering with poorly-hidden lust behind his readers, as his large hands grope your perky ass to guide your squirming hips. his own cock is stiff, pressing against his thigh, but he ignores it in favor of the way your tits bounce in the white negligee you have on.
"mhm, so so good," you mewl and one hand leaves your ass to grope your tits instead, greedy in the way he skims a thumb along your nipple before it travels up your neck to hold your jaw. a self-satisfied moan escapes you, leaning into his palm before he's pulling you in to swallow each sweet noise with a filthy, open-mouthed kiss.
"yeah?" he murmurs against your mouth, gasping into his while he finally slides down a hand to rub your clit with a merciless precision that has you cumming hard in your panties and on his lap. "made a mess, baby."
"sorry, daddy," you whimper but he tsks gently, shushing you again with feather-light kisses along your cheek and jaw. he lays you onto your back before he settles between your legs, pushing the lacy fabric up your chest just for his own sick viewing.
"s'alright, darling, just let me see the mess you made, hm?" his voice is velvet across gravel, pushing your inner thighs apart to see the sopping fabric that greets him. he kisses your clit through the cotton panties, your hips jolting upwards from the sensitivity. "nuh-uh, stay still. how can i clean you up if you keep moving, baby?"
you offer another pathetic apology but it falls on deaf ears when robby makes a home of his face between your legs, his beard rasping deliciously against your slick inner thighs when he tugs your panties aside to lick up the sides of your lips to capture the slick with his tongue. his large hands brace along your inner thighs, the fabric of your panties hooked into one finger to keep them in place so he can delve the tip of his tongue through your folds.
"daddy—!" you gasp as you squirm and wriggle but his arms are steel, keeping you in place against the mattress. it leaves you in the mercy of his tongue, his scruffy mouth determined to lick and lave every drop you've left behind. the low grunts coming from him are muffled but doesn't lessen the obvious enthusiasm he has for eating you out.
"love your fuckin' pussy, sweetheart, so so sweet for me," he mutters, pussy-drunk now as he leans his cheek against your thigh, his calloused fingertips dragging your labia aside to stare at your cunt with the same lovesick expression he holds for you. "look at her, so fucking pretty..."
"ngh, daddy..." you whine as he gives your cunt another slow drag, purposely missing your entrance to spoil your clit with attention. your toes curl as it skyrockets you into your second orgasm of the night but robby doesn't stop, spreading your folds so he can capture every bit of your cum.
when he pulls away, utterly satisfied, his beard is damp with your slick and his readers a tad bit crooked on his nose. "all clean, princess. time for bed, hm?"
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thinking about people witnessing the bossman michael 'robby' robinavitch turning into a softy, submissive pushover when he's with you
like asking him to fetch you something (perhaps a drink) without saying please, only a soft "mikey, can you..." and he immediately gets up without a second thought and follows your command with a "yeah honey"
at a bar or at a party, robby sitting with his legs spread wide open, you standing in between them facing him, his head smushed against your abdomen as you play with his hair, robby's arms wrapped tightly around your legs to keep you still
people hearing the way he whispers to you a soft and pleading "give me one?" when he's leaning in, a giddy smile on his face, theres literally twinkles in his eyes as he's trying to steal a kiss from your lips, eager to show his affections even when theres an audience around
witnessing as you sit on his lap, the way you walk up to him and order him to 'lean back' and settling on top of him, robby constantly planting his lips on your shoulder, looking up at you adoringly (and so so whipped) as you continue the conversation with colleagues and friends while sitting comfortably on his thighs
pulling him towards places by the fabric of the front of his shirt or at his sleeves and he lets you, following your lead happily without protest, sometimes you pull so abruptly he gets a lil bit of whiplash but he just chuckles in response to your excitement or eagerness
most hilariously, and specially when its jack or dana being the ones who witness it: when you're talking or telling a story and robby chimes in on impulse or without warning and you snap at him "baby- dont interrupt me" and robby stops immediately, only a small little amused huff in response
You quietly ask yourself the question of the hour as Michael Robinavitch nestles himself between your legs. They're thrown wide, thighs burning as you're forced to accommodate his mass. You've always known your attending was a big man, tall and with a solid weight to him, seen in his wide shoulders and thick arms.
This, however, is something else entirely, because scrubs apparently do an incredible job of blurring the lines. Robby is large, clearly muscular and with a comforting layer of fat all around, and with him so close in front of you, all you can think about is just how much of him there is.
"What're you looking at?" Robby teases, crawling up your body. You feel dizzy staring up at him, feeling the reach of his thighs across your hips as he straddles you.
"Robby... you're just..." You shake your head in disbelief as Robby leans down. His upper body covers yours as he leans down to kiss your ear. His chest hair is soft, tickling the bare skin of your own chest as you squeak, "You're big, baby."
His lips still, and Robby pulls away. For a moment, you're afraid that your words came out wrong, that you've offended him, but when Robby's face comes into view, he's smirking.
"I'm big?" He asks, raising an arm to rest it on the wall above you. Of course, you take the bait, staring at the length of him stretched over you. "You like that, baby?"
You bite your lip, nodding. Robby opens his mouth. You hear what he says in theory, but you don't comprehend it on account of being too busy staring at his thick arm and wondering what it would feel like around your neck when he's fucking you.
synopsisRobby req. Where him and reader had a fling for a while. She eventually wanted more, he was content with the non commitment, which she ended it over. Fast forward, she's getting married soon, new guy is out of town (if it was park it would add a little flair but you do you). Robby show up at her doorstep, which they end up sleeping together one last time, your choice if she regrets it or not. request!
warningsangst, language, infidelity, smut, p in v, unprotected sex, fingering, oral (f receiving), dirty talk, breast play, robby's emotionally withdrawn and he comes off as a little bit of an a-hole smut MDNI
authornotethank you soooo much for the request and all requests i'm getting, i'm slowly working my way through them as quick as possible. gif credit to @doctorrobbysource
the pitt masterlist. other Robby fic!
Two years ago Robby ended it with you.
It was the sort of date that stuck out to him without the need of circling it on a calendar. Like Doctor Adamson's death. He never needed to count down the days, never needed to tell anyone that the worst days of his life were coming up. Everyone around him just knew.
He woke up that morning already feeling the brittle pain in his heart as he re-lived your last moments together like coming from a bad dream and trying to remember, except he didn't want to remember.
Robby didn't want to re-count the harshest things he'd said to you that night, pulling out any card he could think of to upset you. Why? Because he had been upset. Because you were there? Because you'd been doing everything you could for him to love you and damn it but it worked.
Robby fell in love after promising a casual fling with you.
Now, two years gone by without you in his bed he was reaping the fruits of his labour.
He loved you too late, you left him too early. Something of that kind of tragic thing.
“Morning, Cap!” Dana greeted as he walked in through triage.
He offered her a pulled smile, tight in his cheeks.
The only person who might've had this date marked in their diary was Dana. She kept track of all his bad days.
“If you want I can start you of in north four, got a kid wheezing?” she offered, following him around as he dumped his bag at his work station, peeling back his coat and hanging it over his chair.
“Trying to get your money's worth with me?” he asked, trying to tease.
“Trying to distract you,” she said, honestly. “It's gonna be a tough day today.”
Robby huffed out a laugh. “It's always a tough day.”
Typically it took hours for Robby to make his way to the lounge. Maybe he'd steal five minutes around noon to raid the cupboards for something to keep him going, fill up a water bottle and leave it on his desk not to be touched till it was too late. This morning he'd roused late, had no time to make himself a coffee to go and if he was gonna get through the day he needed a coffee.
Pushing open the door it proved a hard fit as a group of doctors and nurses lingered around the table.
“Woah- woah, we seeing patients in the lounge now, huh?” he asked. “What happened to being doctors?”
The crowd dispersed and he found you in the middle of it all. You pushed yourself up from the table and the crowd parted for you and Robby like the red sea.
“Sorry, that's- that's my fault,” you said.
Robby nodded, lingering. He suddenly felt like he was intruding in his own department.
Slowly everyone began to pile out. Santos led the way, Princess and Perhlah behind talking in their native language so Robby had no idea what they were saying. Whitaker was leaving, sheepishly avoiding Robby's gaze and Samira and Javadi left next, smiling and talking about dresses for the big event.
Mel left next with a short 'congratulations' to you.
Langdon was last to leave, pausing at the doorway.
“You know, Abbey had a wedding planner, helped iron things out and got things on the cheap,” he said. “I can ask and get you her number?”
Wedding planner.
Robby knew what it meant. He went to med school- he wasn't an idiot. Yet he still asked himself if it was a friend of yours getting married. He dared not even look down to your hand.
Your mouth hung open a second before you closed it and nodded. “Er, yeah, Frank, that sounds good. Thank you.”
Langdon nodded and patted Robby on the shoulder before letting the door close behind him.
It two years Robby could count the private conversations you'd had together on one hand.
You stood at the table, hands behind your back. You weren't moving to leave.
“You're... getting married?” he asked, surprising himself with how much level he kept to his voice. There was no notes of emotion, he thought. If there was you'd be able to see through him, probably.
“Yeah. Yeah, I'm engaged.”
Robby had only heard six months ago that you and a guy up in Pedes were doing well and had apparently been doing well for a while. Somehow the information had never kept up with him. He blamed Dana, the only person to know about your no-strings-attached plan turned sour. She was trying to protect him.
He nodded. “Can I see?”
The table stood in between the two of you as you hesitantly held out your left hand.
A gold band with a sizable rock sat there like a foreign object on your ring finger. It was too flashy, he thought first, it didn't feel like you. It felt like a show on a hand.
You, he thought, were an understated kind of person. You didn't like flashy. You didn't like everybody's attention on you at once. Heck- he imagined everyone fawning over you before he interrupted was your idea of hell.
Back when the two of you had something you'd blush every time he passed too closely and whisper in your ear or stutter when he touched you as subtly as possible between seeing patients.
There was a reason your casual thing was kept secret. Robby didn't care if others knew, he'd never cared.
Robby gently took your hand, inspecting it closer. “S'real.”
You chuckled, dry. “Is that all you have to say?”
Robby watched as his thumb soother over the back of your hand, rubbing up and down. He knew that his brain had told him to do that, he was a doctor. He didn't know why or how to stop it. “S'nice. What's his name again?”
“Tom.”
Robby nodded. Slowly, he dropped your hand. “Tom,” he mused. “Tom up in pedes, I'm sure he's a nice guy.”
A guy with kids was always a sure way to win your heart. A guy who could shoe affection, for sure. More than him. He was feeling sorry for himself but couldn't find it in him to care.
“Yeah, you really sound like you believe it,” you said.
Robby lifted his shoulders in response, moving around behind you to get himself a cup of coffee.
“Are you happy for me?” he could hear the un-certainty you asked it with, as if you didn't know if you wanted to know the answer. He could picture you behind him, fiddling with the new ring on your finger, twisting it back and forth.
He was happy for you. Maybe. Even more miserable for himself. “Does it matter?”
“To me, yeah,” you admitted. “And don't ask me why, I'm- I'm not sure why I care.”
Robby knew. It was because you were a caring person, that's what made you such a good doctor, maybe too good a one. You cared about him when he didn't deserve it and still you seem to hold some sort of affection with him.
The pot of coffee grew hot in his hand and he poured it slowly, splashes hitting the back of his hand.
“Are you happy? With him?” he asked in a clipped tone, still without-facing you.
It was your turn to keep the silence. You scoffed, a little chuckle escaping you. “Yeah. I... I think I am.”
That moment of second guessing, that beat of a pause was enough to have Robby thinking you weren't. A chance. That's what was dangling in front of him like a dog with a bone.
Robby considered you, coffee in hand. “You think?”
Though he broke your heart in the end by denying you all parts of him Robby knew that in the rare moments you shared alone, you always found happiness. Whether it was on the tail end of his fingers inside of you, or tongue, or cock, or whether it was simply falling asleep in his bed after a hard shift there was always a genuine smile on your face.
You tilted your head back to get a good look at him. Your laid your hands flat on the table. “I am,” you corrected yourself.
“Then I'm happy for you.”
The coffee burnt his tongue as he took a sip and left you in the lounge, relishing in the heat.
He could pinpoint the moment things began to shift between the two of you.
Robby had been circling around you all day like a shark with a fish. For months- in fact- years it had been that way. Robby handing off a tablet to you, asking about a patient for two minutes and any plans you had for the next five to try to get you to come to his, or he yours. Everyone knew at that point what was becoming off the twoe of you.
There hadn't been any trips from other wards, like Neuro, or social services, or insurance under the pretence of following up on patients only to casually slide up next to Robby. That space, once reserved for his casual 'seven week' thing was taken up by you.
His rather serious casual fling.
The two didn't really go together and if Robby had cared to note that back then he might've been able to hold onto what you had a little longer.
“Patient in twelve?” he asked when you walked up to him, handing him a tablet.
“Waiting for a pysc consult. The woman swears she's pregnant but bloods and ultrasound show nothing.”
He nodded, trying to think of anything else to ask when all he wanted to know if you were going back to his with him at the end of the shift. You had been busy last night, said you had plans and for the first time in months Robby realised how cold and empty the other side of his bed was without you.
“Are you busy tonight?” Robby asked.
You tilted your head down. “Um, no.”
He nodded, scanning the area and wondering who would be listening in. Lucky for him Princess and Perlah, the common perpetrators of gossip, were on the other side. “So mine tonight?”
The blush that crept up your cheeks he hadn't seen since you began this thing.
“Yeah. Sure. Can do.”
Robby peered close at you, wondering what the curt response, almost clipped was for. He decided you were thinking about patients, didn't entertain any other idea.
His hand worked at rubbing your shoulder once before walking by you.
“Actually-” you spoke out, quick on his heels and chasing him down. He slowed his pace just enough for you to walk beside him. “Do you want to, maybe, get food first? I'm starving.”
It was only noon. There was plenty of time for you to get something to eat before he took you home.
“Nah,” he said casually. “I'm sure I got something I cook.”
“Are you sure you want to cook? You'll be tired, there's a place not far from yours, we drive by sometimes, it's Thai I tink.”
Robby still didn't see what you were trying to put down. Or maybe, somewhere in the back of his head he knew but didn't want it to register. He smirked to himself, thinking and leaning down to whisper in your ear. “I won't be too tired to make you come repeatedly, believe me.”
Whatever argument you were trying to make died in your throat as you smiled and kept your head low.
“Okay,” you said, breathless. “Well how about you pick me up from mine at like, nine? If we get out on time.”
Robby had never picked you up from yours to take you to his and press you into the mattress. On occasion he could fuck you in your room, have you melting into his touch in the comfort of your own home but more often than not it was at his place. You would take a long stroll to his if the shift had been bad or he'd take you on his bike you still hated.
It was only a recent thing where you started staying over at his, falling asleep after he'd ravished you. Honestly, he didn't mind it. Robby hadn't realised how much he missed waking up to someone since Jake's mom.
“Just come straight to mine,” Robby shrugged, hands in his pockets.
“I don't know if I want to eat your leftovers.”
“I'll cook.”
“I need a shower then, it's been a crappy morning, I probably smell.”
Robby leaned in subtly, taking a deep inhale. Sure there was a faint wisp of hospital stuck to you but under that there was the sweetness that always had him burying his face in your neck as he released, licking up your sweat like it was honey. “Shower at mine.”
“You telling me you can't at least pick up a woman up before you fuck her all night long?” you asked, pausing in your steps.
He paused to. The promise of all night long re-played in his head. A successful distraction on your end.
“Nine tonight,” you said before sauntering away, leaving Robby reeling.
The rest of the day he didn't get a spare moment to think about it, about why you were so insistent on going home first. He thought maybe you wanted to wash your hair or shave but stuff like that had never bothered him or you. Did you want to change? Make your self pretty for him? He wasn't opposed but any nice clothes you put on wouldn't last long and any makeup would be smeared off by the end of the night.
He caught you at some point talking with Dana, the both of you leant up against a wall in a quiet time.
You seemed stressed. Your shoulders were high, tense and as Dana spoke you. You rubbed at your forehead with the back of your knuckles every now and then but Robby couldn't see what Dana was telling you. He only watched as the older woman who looked out for everyone rubbed your arm soothingly and smiled sadly before leaving.
You didn't see him watching you as you took a deep breath, shaking off whatever was bothering you.
Robby didn't even scan around; he be-lined straight to you. “Hey.”
You glanced back at him, focusing in. “Hi.”
“What was that?”
“What was what?”
“You and Dana? You seemed to be talking, it seemed serious. Everything okay?”
You nodded, flashing him a tight smile. “Yeah. Just a tough pedes case, girl comes in after tripping on the stairs, breaking her arm but looks like there's burn marks on her arms and bruises at her hip.”
“You think abuse?”
You sighed heavily and Robby wanted nothing more than to message the tension out of your shoulders. He made a promise to himself to do it tonight. “It's hard not too.”
“Okay. I'll get someone from upstairs to come and-”
“- don't worry about it, I already called a guy down from pedes.”
Robby nodded and seconds later the two of you were moving through a trauma with perfect understanding of each other. He didn't know if it came from the understanding of bodies in a physical sense or if you really had just spent so much time familiarising yourself with each other.
But concern was brought around again when he spotted you only an hour away from the end of your shift ,standing at the counter with a man he didn't recognise.
He was dressed well, better than him, in a shirt and pants hidden behind a white doctors coat. He could see clean hair pushed back in curls, slightly longer. He was leaning on the counter over at you as if he'd always belonged there.
He was in Robby's space.
“Hey,” he said, trying to keep his voice neutral as he joined the two of you at the counter. “Can I help you?”
Robby looked between the two of you.
The guy was older than you but younger than him, a healthy stubble on his chin and green eyes. Handsome in a way most men were.
Robby caught sight of his name on the coat, Thomas something.
“Oh no, sorry, we were just talking about our pedes case,” he said with a smile.
Robby nodded, looking at you.
“Everything... okay?” he asked. He didn't know why it wouldn't be but still he thought to check.
“Yeah, yeah, course,” you said.
“Great,” said Robby.
He didn't move and neither did Thomas and you stood on the other side of the counter, shifting your weight on foot to foot.
Thomas caught the vibe, drumming his knuckles on the counter and backing away slowly. “The social care team will be down, I'll talk to them.”
“Thank you,” you said.
“I'll call you later.”
Call? Later? Robby watched Thomas walk away and he looked back at you with a soft smile.
When Robby looked back at you you were looking down at the counter.
“Whooo- what was that?” he asked, arms folded over the counter and crowding you in.
“Tom from up in pedes, I asked him to look at that little girl,” you said casually. The way you and him had been talking though, leaning in closer together had been anything but casual.
“I didn't know you knew a guy in pedes,” he said.
You lifted your shoulders in indifference, still not meeting his gaze. “Yeah we've known each other a couple months now.”
Robby waited for you to look at him, to see the frown on his face and smile at him, soothing him the way you did with gentle hands running along his forearms and a kiss to his cheek.
You did none of that.
“Is there anything I should know about the guy?” he asked, wondering if he really wanted to know.
You didn't talk at first and Robby's chest squeezed, like someone had wrapped fingers around his heart and squeezed.
You looked up at him. “We... Tom and I-”
“- Tom?” how long had you known each other to call him Tom?
“- we went on a date last night. Tom and I.”
Around the Pitt he could hear the squeak of wheels and catch the push of gurneys going by. All he could focus on was you.
A date? You hadn't said anything but then again, why would you? He'd never asked because he'd never though to ask? Everyone around the ED knew you had something going on, even patients had picked up on signals some times. He expected word had travelled past the whole PCMT about the two of you.
“A date?” he didn't mean to chuckle, looking back it probably wasn't a good thing.
You looked up at him, something hard and un-wavering in your eyes. “Well we're only casual right?”
“Yeah.” That is what he'd said.
“I can date whoever I want because I'm a free woman.”
He nodded, lips pursed.
“It's not like you probably haven't seen someone else while we're...”
Robby's tongue poked out from the corner of his mouth as he clocked his head. He hadn't so much as looked at another woman when you were there to satisfy his needs. Clearly you couldn't say the same.
In the face of you admitting your date with a guy he didn't need to tell you that you were the only one he returned home to. The only one his lips had familiarised.
“Still on for tonight?” was all he asked.
You nodded.
“Nine at yours.”
When the end of the shift rolled around Robby didn't even check in with you, he got back to his and cracked open a beer. It was already seven o'clock. Were you home, dressing yourself up? Had you wanted to go home first to fit in your call with Thomas?
The thought made him sick and the beer can squashed in his hand, spilling beer over.
At eight he was getting back on his bike and taking the well known road to yours. By half eight he was punching in the apartment code and taking the stairs two at a time to you.
Before he'd even knocked at your door he could smell the faint aromas from you kitchen and the low drum of music.
Was Tom on the other side of the door?
The thought had him knocking a little too harsh.
You paused the music on the other side of the door and swung it open.
“You're early,” you said, holding open the door for him.
“I couldn't wait.”
Robby was already pulling off his jacket as he stepped in and kissed you. He wasted no time in getting your lips to part under his, in licking your lips and getting the faint traces of red wine lying there like lipstick.
As always you hummed a little into his mouth, swinging the door shut behind him.
Robby was inclined to have you on the nearest surface but when he looked to see what it was- the kitchen island- he caught two plates and two wine glasses. His breath caught. “You have company?”
You nodded, happily. “You,” you said, dancing around him. You picked up his coat and slung it over the back of a chair before moving back around the kitchen.
Robby was stuck in an air of confusion with a half hard cock.
“I thought we could eat, before heading to yours,” you said, stirring around in pots and pans. “You like bolognese, don't you?”
“Yeah. But, you know, I ate before coming,” he lied.
You snorted. “Yeah I'm sure left over pizza and beer counts. You can eat a bit more, can't you?”
Robby looked at the plates and the wine poured. There was a couple candles he'd never noticed before lit around the place casting a dull orange glow.
You were back to stirring the pots, setting an almost perfect and strange domestic setting to the place. He was sure his place had never looked so comforting, so homely.
He approached behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist and holding you into him. “I dunno,” he said, gruffly. “I think I've got my mind on other things.”
His beard scratched your neck as he dragged his lips down but he knew you relished in the burn. It had you leaning into him and tilting your neck back for more. His hands palmed at your stomach and he let his tongue lick over your pulse.
Yes, what you were cooking smelled good and yes he was hungry but he was also in desperate need of you withering under him and feeling you un-ravel with his tongue. It was what he was good at. Sometimes he thought it was the only thing he was good at.
“Robby...” your eyes started to flutter shut and Robby's hands moved up your shirt, roughly cupping your breasts and squeezing.
“Bedroom,” his lips tugged and pulled at the lobe of your ear.
“But-” you gasped, hands gripping your kitchen counter. “- the food.”
If Robby didn't know any better (which he was proving at that point in time, he didn't) he'd have almost thought you were stalling.
“How about I work you up an appetite first?” with two fingers on your cheek he turned you to look at him and smashed his lips into yours, stealing your breath and sanity.
Your fingers fumbled to turn off the hob before you turned in his hold, reciprocating his kiss and urgency. “Eat after?”
He nodded, full intending to never sit down and take a meal with you.
By midnight Robby realised there was something wrong.
Not with the chemistry of your bodies, you still moved together in perfect sync, you could still tremble on his fingers and feed into his lust with your own. You were still like two, new, young lovers discovering passion for the first time.
But afterwards you laid next to him, catching your breath before quietly dismissing yourself to the toilet, grabbing one of your old, tatty, shirts from the floor and throwing it off.
It was always good to go after sex, especially as you both preferred it without condoms. Yet after enough time in the bathroom for him to become suspicious, Robby called out.
“You OD'D in there?” he called out.
There was still nothing.
Then the sound of the sink turning on.
Robby waited, your covers pulled up over his lap, his head rested back on his arm.
You came out three minutes later and he looked at you.
Your cheeks were red, eyes glossed over and shirt hanging off your body. Usually you were never in a rush to cover up, flaunting your body around him and spiking arousal again like it was all a game to you.
Robby frowned. You seemed so small in your own room then, lingering in the bathroom doorway. “Something wrong?”
You tugged at the hem of your shirt. You moved, sitting on the edge of your bed. “I want us to go out for dinner.”
“Now?” he asked with a hardly concealed smirk. “I don't think there'll be anywhere open.”
“No, not-not now,” you said, gulping. You didn't laugh or roll your eyes at his attempt at a joke. “At some point I think we should.”
Robby knew at that point he was teetering on the edge of something he might not come back from. One wrong choice of words and he might lose you. “Why?”
You looked at him, gaze painfully blank. “Robby.... C'mon.... you know why.”
He feared he did.
He snorted, propping himself up on his arm. “What like- like a date?”
You thought about it and nodded.
When you and Robby started sleeping together outside of work he thought it was a mutual choice to keep it casual. You'd never pushed him for more and he appreciated it. With others he'd had to express his desire to keep things on the low and as casual as possible. You just got it, discreet invitations to each others house.
Maybe after a year of this non-commitment he should have expected more.
“I thought we were keeping this casual?” he said, looking down and away from you.
It was your turn to chuckle quietly. “What, for two years?”
“It hasn't been-”
“Twenty months, Robby.”
“You've been counting?” he scoffed.
“N-no I just-”
“I'm tired. Can we talk about this later?” he asked, flopping down on your bed. Usually he always found your mattress comfortable but at that moment it felt like a bed of rose thorns.
There was silence and for a blissful moment, Robby closed his eyes and thought he'd got away with delaying the inevitable.
“No, I don't think we can.”
Robby's chest caved. “Okay.” He swung himself up, back to you, switching on your bedside lamp and searching for his clothes.
“What are you doing?”
“If you wanted out, you know, all you had to do was say,” said Robby, talking over every argument you tried to make. “I thought we both understood what this was, that it was just a thing we did-”
“- yeah I did when we started but, come on,” you said, rounding on him as he buttoned up his pants. “Do you really not see this going anywhere?”
Robby didn't say anything, pulling his shirt over his head. “I've got to go.”
He got to his feet but you stood in front of him, a hand out to his chest stopping him.
“Do you see this going anywhere?”
He groaned. “My god, what does it matter?”
“It matters! It matters to me!”
“No I don't see this going anywhere!”
You recoiled like he'd hit you with a bullet.
Robby dragged his hands down his face, taking the couple seconds it brought him. “Listen, it's... it's not you-”
You scoffed, hands planted on your hips. He hated that even then, arguing with him, you looked beautiful. “It's not you, it's me, right?” you mocked.
“I'm not a dating guy, I thought you knew that!” he argued.
“I know your not, geez, I know but I thought... I just thought that after some time you'd change your mind.”
Something twisted and sour settled in his stomach, coiling like a snake.
“Did you only start fucking me in hopes I'd go out with you?”
You looked aghast that he'd even ask. He felt just as terrible for asking. But this was him, not glossed over or lost in kisses. This was what he had to offer. “What? No. No, of course not-”
“That's pretty manipulative if you did,” he said.
“I didn't.”
Robby pulled on his boots next, tying them hastily, pulling a little too tight. “If you wanna go on romantic dates you can call up that Tom guy, not me.”
“Why not you?” you asked, settling close next to him on the bed. “Robby, what is it about you that means you can't settle down?”
He considered you, frowning, creases at his eyes. “I don't want to settle down. There's nothing wrong with me.”
You face contorted as you took in everything he said, slowly digesting his words. “I'm not- I'm not saying there's anything wrong with you.”
“Well, that's kinda what it sounds like.” Robby got to his feet.
You followed, stepping in front of him as he made to move by you.
“I'm gonna go now,” he said. Never had your nights ended so abruptly. Maybe when you first started and neither of you knew if it was okay to sleep in each others bed, whether it was sneaking out in the morning or awkward talk. In the blur of it all you started falling asleep with weak libs and sweat on your bodies, you'd wake up, get coffee, get into work.
Robby supposed maybe it was his fault for letting you get too comfortable.
“Robby,” you stopped him, a hand reaching for his chest. Your shirt slipped down your shoulder. He could see the kisses he'd left there, a last memory. “Are you not even willing to try? Just dinner, that's all I ask. I don't ask for anything else.”
Robby chuckled because it was true. He'd been the needy one, the one searching you out at work, offering you the best cases and to lead the traumas. He was thinking with his dick. But he wasn't in the mood to face that then. “Sure you do.”
You frowned. “Excuse me?”
He rose his brows at you, waiting for you to get the point.
“Don't act like I've been leading this whole thing, you know that's been you,” you snapped.
“Yeah, well,” Robby gulped the bitter taste of his words. “Not anymore.”
He walked past you, shoulder brushing yours.
“Robby!” you called out, stopping him at the door.
He glanced back at you but you hadn't even moved, still facing your bedroom wall.
“If you go now you're not coming back.”
Robby looks back now, wished he'd stayed, wished he'd dropped to his knees and asked you to take him to dinner, ask you to heat up whatever it was you had cooked earlier. He wished he'd stayed in bed, promised to talk about it in the morning and mean it.
But he left and like a fool he really believed the next morning it would all have blown over, that by the next night you'd be to lost in each other to remember the argument.
You didn't so much as look at him the next day and when he tried to call or text he found his number blocked.
Robby lost you before he ever really had you.
You were packing up your last box of kitchen stuff, plates wrapped in tea towels and mugs in bubble wrap, when a soft knock at the door woke you from your meaningless task.
Tom was out at some conference for a couple days, a special committee of pedes doctors around the country. He'd asked you to go but as dedicated to your work as you were yourself you didn't. He'd only left a couple hours ago, you'd promise you'd have all the packing done to move into his down by the time you next saw him.
As a joke, you figured, he'd given it an hour then returned.
So you opened the door thinking as much.
Robby stood on the other side, head rising. He was still in his scrubs, the black of them standing out against the airy hallway of your apartment complex. “Hey.”
Two years ago it might have been a usual occurrence to find him at your door, but it died and had never been re-born.
“Robby. Is everything okay?” You thought something really must have been wrong if he was turning up at your door after hardly any contact besides what was needed when working together.
He peered at you, eyes soft with something you'd never seen. “Can I come in?”
You should have made up some excuse about Tom being there. Or just told him no but both seemed to easy to excuse. Maybe Robby knew Tom was away, maybe he wouldn't take no for an answer. Then you'd have to explain to your elderly neighbours why a man that wasn't your fiancé was outside your apartment.
Without saying anything you held the door open for him.
Robby entered just like he did all those times before. It may as well have been like nothing had changed, that two years of patching yourself up hadn't happened.
Closing your door slowly, you faced Robby standing in the middle of your place that hadn't changed, besides the boxes.
“What's happened?” you asked again, standing at the other end of your kitchen.
“Are you moving?”
“Yeah, I'm moving in with Tom. He's got a bigger place so...” you trailed off.
Maybe this was all your fault for inviting in his opinion about your soon to be wedding, about the ring that sat on your hand. The weight and gleam of it was still hard to get used to.
“How long have you been engaged?” he asked, still looking around the front room like he was trying to remember himself in the space he no longer belonged.
“It's new. A couple weeks? We had to get the ring re-sized.”
You watched him nod before finally looking back to you.
“Are you happy?” he asked.
“You've asked me that already.”
“I just want to know. Are you?”
The truth was: you weren't sure what happiness really meant. Had you been happy when you were only giving your body to Robby when you wanted him to have everything. But were you happy with Tom? When you fell asleep with him and imagined opening your eyes to Robby instead... was that happiness.
You sighed. “I'm happier than I have been.”
It was as honest as you could get.
“Are you happy?” you asked.
Robby's face broke into a smile that was anything but of joy. The lines of age showed around his grimace and his eyes. He ran his hand down the back of his head. “No. No, not really.”
So that's why he had turned up.
You chuckled. You should have known.
Robby chuckled too. “What? What's so funny?”
“Is that why you're here?” you asked. “You're miserable so you've come to make sure I join in on that?”
“Jesus- no.”
“Then why are you here?”
“Fuck! I don't know!” he snapped.
For a moment you wondered if he'd come here to tell you he'd changed. That he wanted you. That he loved you and always had but he was afraid. You'd already practised his entire speech for him, ready for Robby to just say the words.
Robby's jaw clenched and he looked up at you. “Do you love him?”
“Oh, Jesus...” you uttered, turning your back to continue packing. You taped over a side at least three times in effort to distract yourself from him.
“Do you love him?” he repeated, every word punctured with venom.
“You don't know him,” you said.
“Yeah, and I don't fucking want to.”
You glared at him. He had crept closer than before. “Tom is a good guy.”
There were hints of a smirk gracing Robby's lips.
“As if you ever cared about good.”
“I care about love.”
Robby appeared at your side, his hand close to yours without touching you. It was enough to steal away your attention, glancing at him. “I love you.”
The words were like from some fairy-tale, some old dream of yours. The kind of thing you used to imagine in your head before you fell asleep next to him, leaking him and breathing him in.
You jerked up.
His fingers were steady as they slowly wrapped around your wrist. “I love you.”
You shake your head, looking down at the hold he held in you. “You can't love someone the way you treated me.”
“I know, I know,” he uttered, standing closer to you.
However long you spent circling each other around traumas and patients, however much you enjoyed Tom, there was nothing that could replicate the warmth of Robby's body next to yours.
“The truth is...” his hand slowly wound up your arm. His mouth lowered to your ear, his breath hot. “I can't live without you.”
You remembered the times you cried after he left that night and you were resolved to never let him back. You'd blocked his number and almost threw your phone down the trash to rid temptation. Seeing him in work was a new kind of torture and when he dared ask if you could go to his and talk you couldn't even respond. You just left him standing there, hopefully stewing in regret.
You must have cried for weeks before you agreed to go on another date with Tom.
It all felt like it was yesterday with the way he stood next to your, sending shivers all over your body with the way he moved to hold you.
“Robby... we can't...”
Robby inhaled, taking a deep breath of you. When he let it out, it was shaky. His fingers moved back your hair, exposing your neck. He leant in, not kissing, but mumbling in to you. “Please. Please don't make me live without you.”
You'd thought- when Robby returned to you as you wished he would- he'd come with all these promises of being a better man, of finally taking you to dinner and holding your hand and kissing you sweetly.
Robby wasn't promising anything but what he could always give you.
On your kitchen counter you splayed out your hands and Robby looked to your hands as you did, the sliver of gold with the rock catching your eyes.
Robby shuffled to stand around behind you, cascading his arms over yours. He grabbed your hand and curled his fingers around you till your hands were hidden in his. “I love you.... I love you...”
His hand fisted in your hair and brought you into him without resistance.
You melted into him like wax in sun. You wish you could say you put up a fight but wanting him for longer than you could remember made you weak.
His lips were passion and bruising against yours as his whole body moved to cave around yours. Your arms wound around him, curling over his neck and shoulders as you stretched onto your tiptoes. He pulled at your hair and your neck fell back.
Robby dragged his lips down your skin as if he couldn't be parted from you. His tongue dragged down your neck, drawing in wet circles.
Your own hands were pulling at his shirt, clawing it up.
“Yeah, baby.... yeah...” he mumbled into you.
Your hands couldn't decide where they wanted to settle first, where they'd missed the most. All of him. Everything.
In a drag of hands and pull of hips you and Robby stumbled into your bedroom. The same bed, the same room and the same painted walls as he'd seen last time.
Robby kicked the door closed, stumbling into you again and holding your cheeks hard as he kissed you again.
You pulled off his shirt and threw it behind you, dragging your hands down the curves of his belly and feeling around for every bump and groove of him. You wanted to find any change of his and map it in your mind.
Robby's mouth opened against yours, breathing into you. “You feel me?”
You nodded against him, dropping your tongue into his mouth.
“You miss me?” he asked.
You nodded again.
“Yeah, you did, baby.”
Robby took of your top haphazardly, fumbling with it and catching it on your neck. There was a groan before the two of you laughed.
There was nothing to hold or conceal yourself from him as he lowered his mouth hot to your breast, circling his tongue around your nipple and sucking.
Your head fell back in ecstasy. “Oh my god.”
Robby moaned into you. “That nice, honey? Does that feel good?”
He switched to focus attention on the other while groping your breast.
“Feels good, Robby... so good...”
Your hands ran through his hair, nails scratching over his scalp and dragging down. You felt him shiver and groan into your chest.
He went between the two, licking, sucking and kissing while messaging them in his hands.
Leaving a trail of wetness on your chest his hands snuck into your pants and pulled down, falling to his knees with the motion. Gently, as if he was a lover, he helped you stand out of your pants.
His hands were soft on your calves, running up and down gently as his lips followed, peppering kisses.
Robby was still on his knees, only popping the buttons of his trousers to relive his own need straining. With firm hands he pushed at your hips, setting you down on the edge of your bed. “Lie back, baby, lie back.”
You practically fell down onto the bed, your legs falling open.
“Jus' like that baby, you're so good.”
It took all your strength to stop you withering. He'd not even touched you yet. Not where you needed him. Only his hands messaging the plump of your thighs.
You could feel the darkness of his gaze as he lowered his head between your legs, kissing along your thighs.
“Do you need me?” Robby taunted.
You nodded, pressing your lips together firmly.
His teeth nipped at your skin, close to your cunt. “Use your words.”
You jolted at the bite. “Yes, I- I need you, Robby.”
He chuckled, a low grumble from his throat. “Yeah you do... yeah...”
You felt the warmth of his tongue run up and down you. It was familiar and new all at once. The tingle down your skin and want in your stomach was everything you knew but it had been foreign to you since he left.
“Robby... Robby...” you panted as his tongue ran up and down slow enough it felt like torture.
He made some noise into you, watching you as he slid a middle finger into you.
“Arg! Robby!”
“You're so tight, baby,” he said, tongue flat and circling your clit. “He fuck you as good as I do?”
No, he didn't. Tom was a good guy- you meant that- but there was little passion into how he made love, it was all methodical, a perfect amount of time spent to every part of you with rhythmic moves. You'd missed the fire. The way Robby tossed and turned you around.
His finger curled into you. “Does he?”
“No,” you said quick and frantic. “No, he doesn't Robby, not like you.”
With his finger curling in and out of you Robby licked at your clit, sucking it in his mouth.
Your back arched into him. His hand ran down under you, holding you like that, keeping a feast splayed open for him. “Oh, shit!”
Robby pulled back enough to spit into you before licking all around you. “God, you're so messy, baby,” he uttered into you.
You panted as his mouth made work of you, finger gathering your wetness and spreading you all around. He groaned into you, whining too and making a mess out of your cunt as your gasped, breathless, hands curling into your sheets.
His head shook, his tongue wild.
“Robby! Robby!”
He worked in another finger, stretching you out.
“Robby, I can't- I-”
“You wanna come?” he teased, curling his fingers slowly. “Yeah, you wanna come.”
Letting go had been harder to do with the man who were supposed to marry. You could feel your release tightening.
Robby nodded into you, his nose nudging your clit. Just the way you liked. “I'll have you on my cock, I promise, not letting you go again,” he tutted, eyeing the wetness pooling between your legs. “Come for me, honey... baby, please.”
With a hard suck to your clit you let go, hand reaching for him.
He slurped up your release and found your hand, clutching. Your nails were digging into the back of his hand. He let you, gripping you hold enough to turn your knuckles white together.
When he said he wasn't letting you go, he meant it.
Robby waited till your body had finished in trembles before crawling up your body. He kissed you, feeding the taste of yourself into your mouth, tongue licking up yours. The walls of your bedroom reverberated with moans and groans and the creak of your bed as he shifted around, tugging off his jeans.
Propping himself on his heels he marvelled at you, spreading you out.
You got an eye of his cock, hard, pink, veiny and leaking with want for you. It was better than you remembered.
Robby let you look. Though you know from older times of being together Robby didn't always like when you stared. When you followed the curve of his stomach and eyed the fatness of his cock. It was only when you showed him how much you loved the size of him by riding his thigh, stomach and cock that he ever allowed you time to marvel.
He braced himself over you. “I mean it... I can't live without you.”
You shook your head.
You couldn't either.
Your hand ran up his chest, resting at his shoulder. “I've missed you. Every day... every night.”
His head fell into the crook of your neck and he kissed you sweetly there, just once. “I've missed you.”
“Robby, I love you.”
“I love you.”
Slowly he pushed himself into you, filling you with a slow push. His mouth fell open, gasping at the choke your walls kept on his cock.
“Oh shit... oh fuck... arg...”
Your head fell back on the pillow, arching up into him. “Fuck Robby.”
“Yeah... oh shit... I know.”
With gentle care he pushed in, letting you swallow him up. He braced himself on his forearms over you as you took him all up.
“God, I love you... oh, you're so perfect.”
He moved in you slowly, dragging his cock in and out of your walls.
You pushed him down onto you, kissing him. It turned sloppy quickly, as he picked up the pace.
“I'm not- oh shit- I can't hold it, fuck,” said Robby. His head tilted back, screwing up in effort.
His arm stretched out above you, gripping the headboard tightly. The grooves all but fit into his hand as he slammed in and out of you. The plap of skin on skin drummed with the headboard banging against the wall. Your bodies moved, bouncing on the bed.
“Robby! I'm gonna- I'm gonna-”
“Hold on, hold on, hold on,” he mumbled. “Come with me, come with me, just wait, just wait.”
You held onto his shoulders, hands dragging down his back. You knew it would scratch, leave angry welts but as Robby tensed, groaning, you knew he'd want it. Want more.
“Robby, please,” you begged, gaining his attention. “Please come in me.”
His eyes darkened. “Baby-”
“Please. Please.”
Your leg kicked up and wrapped around his hips, forcing him in deeper.
“Shit! Arg- fuck! I can't- ah fuck!”
As if your bodies understood each other Robby finished inside, painting your walls. You clenched around him, taking him for everything he had while you let go yourself.
Slowly his grip released on the headboard and he laid closer to you.
It was quiet as you both watched each other come down. The idea of him moving, of him getting up and leaving had your body stilling. Had him knowing.
“ Don't-”
He shook his head. “I don't. Not yet. Not yet.”
His lips were wet as he kissed you slow. He didn't push for more, just dragged his lips slow.
Your fingers entwined against the bed, the cold band of your engagement ring cold against your flushed skin.
“I mean it, I love you,” he whispered. “I'll go to dinner, we'll get a bigger place. I'll marry you. Just don't... don't leave me.”
You cupped his cheek, feeling the build up of perspiration on his head. “Never.”
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Father’s day. Robby didn’t want to celebrate it. In fact, he told you not to do anything for him when you brought it up. He said that he wasn't interested, and when you went home that night, Robby made sure to schedule himself for work on the dreaded Sunday.
It’s not that he isn’t happy to be a father, not even remotely. Becoming a father is the greatest gift of his life. Too great of a gift. And for what? It's not like Robby deserves it, not after letting you go through pregnancy and those horrifying first few weeks, months, of postpartum life completely alone. Why should he be celebrated for almost abandoning his child, for perpetuating the very same cycle that fucked himself up so much?
Happy Father's Day, Robby, thanks for finally stepping up to the plate!
Still, Father's Day rolls around, and you're not willing to let him off the hook so easily. It starts with a text, a simple well wish and a picture of Elijah. He only likes your "Happy Father's Day! <3 <3 <3" text, but does comment on Elijah's Penguins shirt in the photo. Throughout the day, the text thread look the same. Photos, updates on your day and your artwork, and questions about Robby's. He keeps responses simple, and hopes that the whole holiday thing slips your mind.
It doesn't.
Robby comes home at 7:57pm to a bustling house. The air is electric, carrying the buzz of yacht rock, sizzling foods, and a child's babbling to his ears. It's a sedative, melting away the jagged edges of Robby's day. You find him quickly, kissing away his remaining woes as you greet him with a soft, "Happy Father's Day, handsome."
"You shouldn't have," he argues, not because he thinks it'll make a difference, but because the way your expression flattens makes his chest stir.
"Shush," you say. "Now go say hello to your son, and take a shower. Dinner'll be ready when you're done."
You send him off with a pat on the ass. Robby finds Elijah crawling in his play pen. As he kneels, Robby notices that Elijah is no longer wearing the Penguin's shirt. When the boy spots Robby, he sits up, showing his father the text on his baby blue tee.
Daddy's 1st Father's Day!
It knocks Robby on his ass. Hot tears burn his eyes as Robby scoops his son and cradles him to his chest.
"Did you and mommy do this for me, kiddo? You shouldn't have." Robby sniffles and presses a kiss to Elijah's head, "You really shouldn't have."
He still may not believe he deserves it, but Robby sure does like Father's Day.
