Scar Diary

You know that feeling? When you're just waiting. Waiting to get home, into your room, close the door, fall into bed, and just let everything out that you kept in all day. That feeling of both relief and desperation. Nothing is wrong. But nothing is right either. And you're tired. Tired of everything, tired of nothing. And you just want someone to be there and tell you it's okay. But no one's going to be there. And you know you have to be strong for yourself, because no one can fix you. But you're tired of waiting. Tired of having to be the one to fix yourself and everyone else. Tired of being strong. And for once, you just want it to be easy. To be simple. To be helped. To be saved. But you know you won't be. But you're still hoping. But you're still wishing. And you're still staying strong and fighting, with tears in your eyes. You're fighting..

At 4am she lays in bed, Listening to her favorite band, Thinking of all the things she's done wrong At 4 am she thinks of all those who left She blames herself for them leaving Suddenly she starts crying She finally lets it all out She's not as strong as she once was

The first cut wasn’t the deepest, No, not at all. It was the others, A subtle rend of anxious skin, A gentle pulse of crimson, Just enough to hush the demons Shrieking inside my brain.