Untitled

She had to admit it was efficient. The way he seemed to know exactly what he needed and where to find it, even though it was Robin who had set up and organized this base in the first place. The way his mechanical hands worked in conjunction with his organic ones - one unwrapped the gauze, the other cut it, one uncapped and poured the sterilizing antibiotic all in one go, one was keeping her steady as it pressed up against her upper thigh. 

Affected still by the fuzzy feelings Al-an had somehow planted in her head, the dulled feeling of pain and the chemicals dictating her happiness and comfort coursing through her veins, she just laid back with her head back on the pillow. She wasn’t uncomfortable with his proximity to her nude form, but she didn’t know if that was because she was truly okay with the circumstances or if his little trick was the true culprit. It was conflicting, though she didn’t have much mental capacity to entertain that. 

The ordeal was done and over with in only a few mere minutes and Robin only noticed when she realized she had been free of his touch for a few seconds. She propped her head up to look at him to discover he was finished and simply looking at her now. 

“Oh, all done?” Robin questioned, feeling on some level like she should be recoiling at his gaze and covering herself up but simply not having the brainpower to truly feel those feelings. She did have one of her arms draped lazily over her chest, though. 

“Yes,” Al-an responded, a tone to his voice that seemed awkward. “But I am unsure of what to do now.”

“What?” 

“Your culture,” Al-an looked away, feigning interest with a lantern tree growing out of a pot in the corner, “I thought I was more familiar with it than I was. I do not know what to do now, to keep you from being angry and uncomfortable.”

Robin was a little taken aback by his words - it wasn’t often that Al-an admitted to not knowing something, but that wasn’t the main surprise. The main surprise was the way he spoke to her, so softly, if she didn’t know better she would’ve thought he was afraid. Of … upsetting her? 

Had she really gone so far? As to make Al-an feel afraid of angering her, making her uncomfortable? To feel like he’s walking on eggshells around her?

Robin sighed. “Oh, Al.”

He turned to look at her immediately, head tilted slightly with hints of curiosity. She almost smiled at it, and she would have if she wasn’t feeling so guilty. 

“I’m sorry that I said such mean things.” It was Robin’s turn now to shamefully avert his gaze. “I don’t know what’s gotten into me. I guess with everything going on lately it’s been harder to understand and control my emotions.”

A moment of silence passed between them. 

“I understand.” It was a simple phrase, and it was all Al-an offered. 

This sparked a sense of anxiety within Robin - she wanted to hear how upset he was, how she made him feel, if he forgave her or not, she would’ve even preferred he’d taken the opportunity to air his grievances with her. But he didn’t. All he said was he understood. 

It gave her an unsuppressable urge to continue, to ramble, to give him something to respond to. “I should have just let you take my clothes off and look at my injuries when this all started, then we wouldn’t be in this position. It’s just that it’s generally very important for us to maintain our, dignity? I guess?” Another moment of silence passed between them and it was clear Al-an wasn’t going to respond. Hastily, she added a question, “Don’t Architects have any of those social customs, things you shouldn’t do or show?”

Al-an glowed a soft green and she was relieved to obtain a discernible non-verbal response, much better than the silent lavender he had been shining since the Sanctuary. She was even more relieved to hear his voice when he spoke. 

“Well,” Al-an began slowly, clearly eager to move past her apologies even if in only a slightly unrelated way, “yes, of course we do.” His tone begged her to inquire more and she was happy to comply.

“Like what?”

“As I have told you, many of our desires and actions are driven by the needs of the Collective. It is socially inappropriate to conduct ourselves in such a manner that misrepresents those needs - or directly opposes them.” Al-an clicked, something she was beginning to interpret as an expression of happiness (or at least neutrality). “This can range from large-scale transgressions to smaller ones. It would be impolite of me, for example, to communicate to a group of others using my actual voice as I am doing now. It would be expected of me to entwine my voice with the Collective in a way akin to your internal monologue.”

Robin was very interested. She’d always enjoyed learning about Architects and now seemed as good a time as any. “You guys sound kind of strict, then.”

“You could say that… yes.” Al-an concluded, slowly packing away the med kit he had forgotten about. 

“It kind of sounds to me like everyone’s sort of expected to think the same thoughts.”

“I suppose that is a reasonable conclusion to draw.”

A gust of air draped over her as the air filtration in her base kicked on and she was suddenly acutely aware of her total lack of clothes. A blush quickly overcame her, the dimming of her feelings Al-an had previously placed on her slowly but surely fading. “Um, Al?”

“Yes, Robin?” It was almost mesmerizing to watch the way he elegantly clopped those hooves as he walked, returning from the far side of the room where he was placing the medical supplies he had just packed up. 

“I’m still sort of naked. Do you mind getting me some clothes from the closet?” Robin pointed meekly in the vague direction of where she stored her clothes, tightening her legs and holding an arm over her chest once more. 

“Oh!” Al-an exclaimed, sounding like he had literally just noticed it. He blinked over to her closet and in an instant was flipping through each shirt and pair of pants she had. “Any preferences?”

“Uh, I dunno.” Robin glanced at his rummaging, not that she could see any specific clothing items from this distance. “Something comfortable.”

Al-an blinked back over to her with a pajama set and underwear. “Is this sufficiently comfortable?”

Robin nodded, looking more at him than at the clothes he had picked. This felt so… intimate? There was suddenly such a thick blanket that hung over them (or maybe just her) of something heavy but not uncomfortable. 

She didn’t say anything about Al-an having picked out a bra for her even though she didn’t actually wear a bra under her pajamas.

She didn’t say anything as he moved her over and kneeled behind her to help her put it over her breasts. She didn’t say anything when his claws groped her, a pace suspiciously slow, to make sure he’d positioned it correctly. Or when he (hesitantly?) pulled those claws away to finally clasp it. 

She didn’t say even a word about how she was more than capable of dressing herself as he slipped her underwear on - not even when a turbulent part of her suddenly preferred she’d kept them off. 

She wasn’t saying anything but her breathing betrayed her. If Al-an noticed, he kept silent as he finished slipping her pajamas on, still a pace so slow she could’ve sworn he was dragging it on on purpose. 

And honestly, he was. A dark and mischievous part of him was still curious about how he could interact with her body - he’d never really seen or felt her, all he saw her as was that girl wearing the wetsuit, but that wasn’t her. If she insisted on this eternal connection with her corporeal form, he figured he has the right to be curious about it. He certainly wouldn’t admit the deeper motivations to himself, though. He was acting on scientific curiosity, nothing more. 

His claws lingered over her sides, something that made Robin hold back a giggle, one nervous, almost as if he was about to tickle her. Of course, though, he didn’t. 

She was disappointed when he retracted his grasp and took a step back. 

“Does this continue to be sufficiently comfortable?” A question he wasn’t quite sure why he asked, but that just slipped out. 

Some unreal exercise in self-control kept Robin from saying what she was really thinking, a simple no, actually, I think I was far more comfortable before, let’s get these clothes off and she just nodded with a dry swallow.

Strangely, Al-an was embarrassed to admit to himself he felt similar, and he didn’t know why. He suddenly wanted to move on and leave the room in order to stop himself from wanting to stay there and comply with those demands he couldn’t even hear but rather felt. 

“I’m glad.” he responded in a way sounding perhaps a bit disappointed. 

“Yeah,” Robin responded. 

A moment of silence passed between them in which they just stared at each other. Then Al-an turned around. 

“Goodnight, Robin.” Al-an said, facing the door. He blinked towards it, turned off the light, and blinked right out of her room. 

So quickly had Robin been left there, staring at the spot in the doorway Al-an had just been, feeling things overwhelming and unidentifiable (or perhaps she was just denying what she thought those feelings were). She swallowed another dry swallow before laying down, trying to will her racing heart to still and the burn in her cheeks to cease. 

“Al-an, stop! I can’t just sit around doing nothing forever. I’ve already fabricated a new wetsuit and it’s not like I broke my leg, I want to keep going.” Robin clenched her fists, digging her nails into her palms, hoping the pain would distract her from the anger bubbling inside of her. 

“Robin,” Al-an took a step back and looked at her, trying to think of a response that would diffuse the situation. He was at a loss for words, something quite unusual for him.

He had been trying to convince her that she simply cannot continue to work when injured - it could exacerbate the injury and prolong healing time as well as invite longer-term issues. 

Al-an had insisted they could wait to gather these supplies, he had proposed he gather materials alone while she worked in the base, he had suggested helping her within the base instead, yet Robin just seemed to get angrier and angrier with each suggestion. He was truly unsure of what to do, it seemed like there was an emotional charge behind this issue that he simply did not understand (as desperately as he wanted to) and it seemed like no matter what he said it made everything worse.

Robin glared demandingly at Al-an, waiting (rather impatiently) for him to finish his sentence. 

“What… do you want?” Al-an pressed his arms into his chest, fidgeting with his claws. A nervous habit. 

“What? You know what I want. I want to get the damn cure ready so when we go and see all your ‘oh-so-superior’ Architect friends you don’t get fucking ostracized from society and your Network, so for the love of god just let me do what I need to do.”

Al-an stiffened and diverted his gaze with a slight bow of the head. Robin’s hand shot up to her mouth. Oh god, that was, really mean. 

“Oh, shit, I’m sorry, I’m sure that won’t happen, I’m sorry, I-“ Robin’s anger had been quickly replaced by regret as she witnessed the glow of her strong friend dim, the way he completely stopped fidgeting, it made her feel awful. Al-an cut her off.

“I understand. I still do not recommend your exposure to the elements in this state, however it is your choice.” I cannot keep her safe nor alive when she has her mind set. The thought was horrid. 

He had spent a millennia separated from all contact. Even when he had been within reaches of contact, he had to pull back when he recognized their intentions. Now that he had met the one person he was able to trust and care for with the collective strength of whatever Network was left in him, she just wanted to do whatever she wanted. Even if it meant she would die. 

Was it selfish? Perhaps, but he understood that feeling - of thinking you know better. 

He also knew the regret of finding out you didn’t. 

Al-an looked towards the sea beneath them, accessible through the passageway made by the moon pool’s entrance. He returned his gaze to Robin. 

“I cannot aid you at the moment.” He couldn’t think of a way to put the ‘why’ into words. “I must attend to business in the Sanctuary.”

Before Robin could respond, he had blinked down through the moonpool and away. 

‘Oh my god.’ Her heart wrenched. ‘Oh my god, what is wrong with me? Why did I say that?’

Without thinking, Robin grabbed her oxygen tank and hopped in after him. 

The first thing she noticed was how cold the water was - she was wearing her newly fabricated protective wetsuit but where she had been wounded she had heightened temperature sensitivity. 

But soon after noting that, she was really starting to feel the pain from exercising the muscle, it was searing and the burn of it almost completely overwrote the chills she had. 

She winced, but she clenched her teeth and kept swimming. 

——————-

Robin had finally reached the entrance to the sanctuary, a kilometer swim. It was where she had first found Al-an, and she would’ve been nostalgic about it if she wasn’t in such emotional and physical turmoil. 

She swam through the force field that separated the water from the air, but misgauged her position. She fell to her knees with a cry she couldn’t stifle and just buried her face in her hands. 

Her mind was screaming conflicting demands to her - stop moving, get up, stay here, find Al-an. She clenched her fingers around her face, trying her best to mitigate this pain. 

Suddenly, she heard the sound of zipping and of hoofs landing on the cold ground. She ripped her hands away from her face and stared up at Al-an.

“Robin!” He quickly used his mechanical hands to help support Robin as he picked her up with his anti-gravity beam. 

“Al-an,” Robin’s voice cracked and she couldn’t take it anymore - she broke down into tears. 

Instead of holding her up to inspect her, Al-an immediately pulled her close to him. Acting off learned instinct (but still with a slight hesitation), he wrapped his organic arms around her and held her tight. “Robin, what is wrong?”

Robin buried her face into the crook of his neck and sobbed. “You- you were right, Al-an.” Her breath hitched. “It hurts like a bitch. And I’m so sorry. I didn’t want to be mean to you, it just slipped out, and -“

“I do not desire to be right. I desire for you to be safe.” Al-an’s chest emanated worried clicks, something more felt than heard. He lowered himself as he continued to hold Robin’s trembling being. “Your muscle is fatigued and you may have exacerbated the tear with your movements.”

Al-an paused hesitantly. “I understand you don’t enjoy this, but may I remove your wetsuit to examine the injury?” His voice remained steady but there was a sense of urgency to it. 

Defeatedly, Robin nodded. She just wanted this searing pain to stop, she had no desire let alone capacity to complain at the moment. 

Al-an let out a noise resembling a sigh and hovered one mechanical arm over the zipper on the back of her wetsuit. He stopped over it, thinking for a moment. “Robin, is there anything I can do to make this more comfortable? I desperately want to avoid causing you discomfort.” he spoke very gently. 

“Um,” Robin said through a stifled sob, “Please just… don’t look at anything but the injury.” Her cheeks burned and she shut her eyes tight. 

Al-an began pulling the zipper down slowly, watching her carefully to make sure she didn’t protest.

“Al-an, please hurry it up, just rip the band-aid off,” Robin whined. 

Al-an understood the intent and got to work removing her wetsuit. He laid it down beneath her as to separate her from the cold ground when he laid her down. 

Part of him was curious about her anatomy - about the opportunity to examine her physical features and characteristics, to see how he could interact with them, but a much larger part of him was worried and respectful of her wishes. So he looked at her wound and nothing else. 

He glowed a soft green as he processed the visuals before him and the vitals he could read. The injury was inflamed and red as well as quite raw from the repeated friction from the wetsuit. In a few places it bled and the whole thing definitely seemed worse than he expected it was this morning (even though he never got to see it).

Al-an could also sense the adrenaline coursing through her veins, her heartbeat quickened by pain and anxiety. 

“I do not have the necessary resources to treat this right now.” He spoke slowly, then looked up at her face. She could feel his gaze and opened her eyes slightly to meet it. “May I do something quick to assist you before we go back to the base?”

Robin nodded. 

With that confirmation, Al-an leaned down and gently pressed his forehead into hers. For a few moments she could only see the faint glow of his face through her closed eyes, but suddenly she felt it. An overwhelming rush of relief overtook her, the pain practically melting, senses dulling. It was weird, she could practically feel her heart rate slow and her breathing return to normal. 

“What…?” Robin asked questioningly once he had separated from her. 

He clicked in a fashion she could’ve sworn was affectionate (she had no idea why she thought so, but she couldn’t shake it) and tilted his head before answering her question. “I smoothed your heart rate and breathing and assisted your body in producing endorphins and dopamine. I also dulled your pain perception.” He clicked another series of quick trills before continuing. “Do you feel better?”

Robin took in a big breath and slowly released it. She smiled weakly. “Yes. Much better.” She gave an exhausted chuckle, as if to assure him, but her face fell serious once more. “But, Al-an, I came here to talk to you about what I said, I’m so -“

“I do not wish to speak of this now. There are more pressing matters at hand - your safety.” Al-an stood up but kept her close. “Brace yourself, I am about to return us to the base.”

made a second chapter! here it is, but feel free to also check it out on archives of our own! https://archiveofourown.org/works/47314900/chapters/119299657

The sun cast a warmth over the surface of the water as it rose over the horizon. Morning brought the bioluminescence most of the local flora and fauna held into a slumber of its own - the higher the sun rose, the dimmer the light originating from under the surface got. By 7am, the day had fully begun.

Robin had been watching the gentle sunrise, the beauty of the world outside never failing to mesmerize her. She laid on her side, blanket tucked over her shoulders, still enjoying the snugness of her bed.

She was surprised to find she didn’t feel tired. She had been up a little later than usual last night, busy mulling over her thoughts over what had happened that day. 

Her leg did ache, though. Damn, ice worms had rough skin. When that thing ran over her skin it felt like she’d had an electric sander pressed into her - the heat generated from its quick movement burnt her where it touched, but she didn’t get to experience the burn very deeply because she was practically shredded by its razor-sharp skin before she even had time to react to that heat. 

Although it left a nasty raw spot and some burns, she should’ve felt lucky she got away from the situation with only a few scrapes and bruises. 

But that was one of the main sources of her conflict. She didn’t feel lucky. 

The entire thing had happened so fast - Al-an had suggested they end their searches for the night, picked her up with his stupid beam, put her on his back, and wordlessly blinked across the basin towards the water. And then out came that big ugly worm, knocking her off her already unsteady seat and onto her ass where she was ravaged by its attack. And she had done nothing, because she couldn’t do anything. 

She felt like a rag doll, like Al-an had just picked her up like a child picks up a toy when they’re ready to go home after a day at the park and then dropped her into a dirty puddle of… cheese graters? Robin shook her head as if to shake the analogical line of thought away. 

She knew he hadn’t been being careless and he didn’t intend for her to feel this way, but she felt like everything that happened that night was completely out of her control. The way that he grabbed her, dropped her, grabbed her again, then tried to strip her clothes off - it felt inhumane, no matter the nobility of the actions. 

Robin understood that Al-an wasn’t the best at communicating, especially in stressful situations. He tended to just shut down verbally when they were met with frustration or fear and she found herself missing the connection they had had when he was in her head - as uncomfortable as it was, she at least knew what he was feeling. It was so much harder when all you have to go off is the colors he shines (maybe? She still wasn’t sure about that theory) and the movements he makes, half of which he does with these mechanical arms of his that somehow feel separated from his person regardless. 

Frustration bubbled within her. She had the night of rest to gather her thoughts and yet she somehow felt more conflicted about it now than she had yesterday. 

Robin squeezed her eyes and took in one, two, three breaths. She opened them, now nourished with a sense of freshness, and decided to really think about this. 

She decided to bring herself to a point in her past she hadn’t intentionally recalled in years.

A young Robin, perhaps 5 or 6, sat on an exam table. The memory was fuzzy, but grasping at the edges (an effort she didn’t quite want to make but happened nonetheless) she was able to recall a few things - the bright fluorescent lights that overpowered the sun that shone through the little window, the coldness of the office, the smell of rubbing alcohol. 

She was swinging her legs off the side of the exam table, muttering to herself things she could never hope to remember, just bits of imagination and play that occupied her mind at the time. Her mother sat in front of her reading a magazine, or perhaps a book, or maybe flipping through her phone? 

The doctor, a man with a gruff voice but a face she couldn’t remember, knocked twice on the door before opening it. It had startled Robin and she looked up at him as he entered, watching him as analytically as such a little kid could. 

The doctor barely gave Robin a passing glance and instead shook her mother’s hand, expressing some sort of request to speak about her visit. Mom stood up and joined him by the door. 

Robin could only watch them as they planned - she would be getting three inoculations today and a blood draw, a hearing test, they would be testing her reflexes and evaluating her on how she was adjusting to school. 

Robin furrowed her brows. Her memory at this point was young and she couldn’t remember the previous appointments she’d been to with much detail, this was all very new to her, and very… scary. “What are you guys talking about?”

At her voice the doctor glanced at her, as if just seeming to notice her, and waved her off. “The adults are talking, honey. I’ll get to you in a second.”

Robin frowned. It felt like all she could hear was ‘Robin’ this and ‘Robin’ that, but she wasn’t even being offered the courtesy of being included in this conversation? She wasn’t even going to be told directly what was going to happen today, none of it was going to be explained? Indignantly, she spoke again. “Hey, you’re talking about me, you know.” 

The doctor pried himself away from the conversation with Robin’s mother again to shoot her another look, one she couldn’t quite recall but that sent a feeling of anxiety down her throat. Robin’s mom laughed nervously and apologized for her behavior, turning to Robin and giving her a demanding look.

What? Now Mom was APOLOGIZING for her? She wasn’t sorry. She felt like she had a right to be included in this conversation that’s about HER, why are they just pushing her aside and treating her like she’s being annoying.

Why are they ignoring her?

Why are they giving her those looks?

Why are they using that big language she couldn’t yet understand, why isn’t she allowed to know what’s going to happen?!

Robin had followed that memory as far as it could bring her. The vividness faded quickly and she was left with only the feelings associated with it - a sense of anxiety, anger, fear. 

So that’s what their little ice worm encounter yesterday reminded her of. All those times in her childhood that she was expected to just sit by and pretend not to listen as ‘the adults’ spoke about her, as they planned for her without even asking her what she felt about any of it.

Sam was the only one who ever understood. The thought was sudden and brought a pang of pain to her heart. 

Sam had always been easily convinced to meddle and figure out what was happening, and even though she was a good few years older than Robin, she’d always treated her seriously. She couldn’t recall a single time where Sam would brush her off, she never had to hear ‘The adults are talking, Robin’ from her big sister. 

Until she started working at Alterra and suddenly every communication held this serious air, like they were being monitored, and all Sam did was exchange pleasantries with someone she had shared a womb with - it really hurt. 

After Sam began working for that god awful company, every time they talked it felt like she was talking at her, not with her. It was hard to speak to her those last few months, she even avoided it, before…

Robin swallowed, feeling tears well up in her eyes. She bit her tongue and looked up at the roof, blinking them away. Not the time. There was something else to focus on right now. 

After a few grounding moments, Robin calmed herself. Using her bed frame, she pulled herself up. 

It was time for coffee. Too much thinking for… 8am? She had been laying there just reveling for an hour? Jesus. 

Robin tried to keep her mind away from any more heavy thinking as she hobbled her way into her makeshift kitchen. Seriously, it felt like if she poked at it any further the dam would burst and she’d just be sitting there blubbering.

Al-an was in the kitchen, flexing his claws nervously and idly tinkering with forgotten tools. He was just trying to keep his hands and mind busy while he waited for Robin to awake. 

He wasn’t quite sure if she’d be able to walk after yesterday’s event and once her usual wake up time had passed he was wondering if he should check on her. 

He felt it would not garner a good response, considering how they left off yesterday. So he just decided to wait. 

Al-an turned to face Robin as she entered the room, acutely aware of her approach. He looked at her analytically, but was more focused on keeping himself meticulously composed, ensuring the pulse and colors of his energy channels didn’t give away anything he didn’t want given away. 

As he considered whether or not to greet her first, she spoke. 

“Hey there, big guy.” Robin shot him a warm smile and it cut a tension that neither of them had even known was there. 

“Good morning, Robin.” Al-an felt a weight he didn’t even know was there lift off of him knowing that she was willing to talk to him. A good start.

“What’re you doing here? You’re never in my base this early in the morning.” Robin tilted her head, emulating that habit of Al-an’s unconsciously. He noted it.

“I was concerned for your well-being. I did not want for you to experience any distress as a result of your injury.” Al-an took a few tentative steps towards Robin, voice soft now. “I thought it wise to stay here, waiting for you.”

Robin scrunched her nose and sniggered. “Al-an,” her voice came out sweet, but with an undertone of annoyance. “I didn’t split in half. I’m okay.” 

Al-an looked down at the ground in front of them for a moment, unable to stifle a bit of guilt. He looked back up at her. “I know. But it was still dangerous, even frightening.”

“Maybe for you.” She laughed and put a hand on his claw. “I’m fine, Al-an. Could we talk about this later?”

Al-an stared at her for a few moments. He wasn’t sure he wanted to wait to further discuss this, it seemed pretty important for her well-being and the health of their companionship. He still wasn’t quite sure what had caused her to become so agitated yesterday and he certainly didn’t want to repeat it. 

But he didn’t want to push either. “Okay.” He turned away and walked to the fridge, opening it and taking something out. Robin looked at him curiously as she set some coffee to make.

He walked over to the table and placed down a marblemelon. It was sliced a few jagged and uneven ways. Al-an looked at Robin. He enjoyed the radiating warmth that seemed to come from her joy. (It was illogical - how could a smile create warmth?) He spoke carefully. 

“I have gotten you breakfast from your greenhouse.” To make amends. But he didn’t mention it, because she didn’t want to entertain that topic. 

He had been searching Robin’s PDA last night to try to figure out what sorts of acts helped with making amends and difficult conversations. It was much harder to find than he thought it would be, seems that when something is common courtesy in a society it is seldom documented in writing. 

Just another aspect of human history and culture he found fascinating (and perhaps a little inefficient). The fact that some things simply existed in this raw form, a trained behavior passed down through pure culture. 

But he had managed to find some sources. One recommended he make her a breakfast. 

He wasn’t exactly a cook and they didn’t have the most fabulous ingredients here, but he tried anyway.

“Aw, Al-an…” Robin limped over to him, a big smile on her face, and wrapped her arms around him. She gave him a little squeeze before separating. “Thank you. I was craving marblemelon.”

Al-an was only humoring her. As much as he desired that same hope that Robin seemed driven by, to allow himself to become enveloped in it like it enveloped her, it never came. Instead, he was faced with a grim reality.

Robin had suggested that they go and make a replica of the cure before they left for Al-an’s homeworld. Robin had argued “it could help you make amends”. According to what they synthesized, it wouldn’t be too difficult to locate and deconstruct the various flora the antidote called for. So, Al-an had agreed.

What he hadn’t told her is that he’d already considered that. He’d already had that thought mull through his head a thousand times - but each time he was hit with a wall.

If his people were alive, they would surely already have a cure by now. By the time he was infected, their efforts were already tireless – there was no other point of focus within the Network, they needed an antidote.

More likely, however, his people were no more.

Throughout their explorations, they had discovered, scanned, and dissected every piece of Architect technology they had come across, and yet Al-an had gotten nothing definitive about his Network at all. All he had been able to derive from it all were useless threads that, no matter how long, had always dissipated and left them empty-handed. The only thread that remained led them through the Phase Gate, the gateway to his homeworld. A daunting task.

So, perhaps that’s why he decided to go along with Robin’s idea, didn’t argue his point - he was scared. Not that he would ever admit it, but… it felt far too easy. He’d battled a millennia for these answers, and now suddenly they were so close. The anxiety of finally being one door away from finding out was almost as drowning as the anxiety of not knowing whether or not he ever would be able to.

And maybe, just maybe, an even smaller part of him was dragged under that blanket of hope Robin was under. The soft, warm embrace of it seemed impossible to evade, no matter how statistically unlikely this hope was. And truly, ‘lying down and giving up” as Robin had said would be a much worse inefficiency by far than holding onto this belief, no matter how unlikely.

So, maybe that’s why he was looking through the trees of the glacial basin with Robin for something he thought fruitless. Even if he was sort of worried she was freezing her ass off.

“Robin, it seems unnecessary that we search now. It is almost night and I predict we are experiencing the start of a blizzard.” There was an edge of urgency in his voice, but he kept his tone gentle.

“What? You cold?” Robin grinned and shot him a look - though her teeth were chattering so much she could barely get the sentence out. She rubbed her gloved hands together and held them close, shivering.

Al-an let out a noise akin to a sigh and approached her with an elegant stride, standing between her and the direction of the snowfall.

“I am resistant to more drastic temperatures than you are. I have far more energy within me to regulate my internal temperature and my tissues are very insulative.” Al-an led one of his mechanical arms towards her and grasped her in his anti-gravity beam. He placed her on his back. Gently, he added “I am not cold.”

Robin, honestly freezing, immediately wrapped her arms around Al-an’s waist, enjoying the warmth radiating off of him. “Okay,” Robin said through clenched teeth, “since you’re cold we can go back to base.”

Al-an produced a hum of disapproval but was pleased that he had managed to convince her so easily. “As you wish.” he offered, noting the way she leaned into him. She must be tired, he considered. They had been searching since early morning.

“Brace yourself.” Al-an warned as he steadied himself, preparing to blink across the land.

He hadn’t carried Robin on his back before and it was a slightly uncomfortable sensation, the pressure of her weight was unknown to him. He took Robin’s tightening grip as a sign she was ready and began to make his way across the land.

At first, things were okay - but they took a pretty drastic turn when Al-an blinked right in front of an emerging ice worm.

Stumbling back, Al-an tried to find his footing over the shaking ground, but Robin had already lost her grip and fallen off with the momentum.

She sat on the ground, stunned from the sudden change of pace. Night had already almost fully enveloped the sky and visibility was low - Al-an frantically calculated how to evade the situation, putting a foot forward to snatch Robin out from the ice worm’s trajectory.

However, he was not accounting for Robin’s scream and attempt to roll out of the way - which caused him to miss her as he blinked towards her. Al-an dug his heels into the snow and turned around, but not quick enough.

The ice worm simply followed its plan of attack and lurched forward, smashing into Robin and burying itself in the ground in front of her. And that was it. It was gone. And all Al-an did was watch helplessly.

He cursed himself as he blinked back over to Robin and crouched down in front of her to get a better look at her injuries. She was panting and biting her lip, gripping her outer thigh.

“Robin,” Al-an hurriedly moved her hand out of the way and felt a wave of guilt crash over him as he saw fresh blood leak out of the open wound.

“Its skin was like sandpaper,” Robin informed him, face clenched as she tried to suppress the pain.

But Al-an wasn’t paying attention. He grabbed a first aid kit that had fallen from her bag and opened it, quickly handing the roll of gauze within it to one of his mechanical hands. He muttered an apology as he used his claws to open a water bottle and flush the wound with the cold water, which garnered him an unhappy groan from Robin. He used the roll of gauze to wrap her thigh and just like that, in 45 seconds, he had her up in his anti-gravity beam and was blinking towards their base at a rapid pace.

He went up through the moon pool and lowered her onto her bed, crouching down again and using his mechanical hands and scanner to look her up and down for any more injuries. Fortunately, it seems he had managed to evade her going into shock by staunching the blood loss quickly and she only had mild scrapes on her lower leg and arm, but her protective wetsuit was utterly torn. He went to work removing it from her but she yelped, “Al-an!”

Al-an froze and looked at her. In the position he was in, they were eye level with each other - something they certainly didn’t often experience. Robin protectively held onto her clothing. “Al-an, you can’t just strip me naked just like that -“ he cut her off.

“Robin, you are injured. I’m tending to you and to do this I must remove your wetsuit.” Al-an had a breathless sense of seriousness in his voice and he spoke quickly. “It has been breached. I must remove it, assess your other injuries, and disinfect them.”

“I’m fine! I can tend to myself!” Al-an was acutely aware of how her heart rate was increasing and adrenaline was pumping steadily through her veins. He did not want her going into shock now, he already stove it off the initial injury and wasn’t about to allow it to enter now.

Despite his worry, he spoke gently. “Robin, I can more accurately tend to you than you could yourself. I have more equipment at my disposal and there is an inherent flexibility in myself being separate from you. What’s wrong?” Al-an removed his mechanical hands from the zipper of her wetsuit and removed his touch from her.

“I- just-“ Robin took a breath to steady herself, breathing in and out. Al-an watched her self-regulate and waited patiently for her response (though, if it were up to him, he would NOT be waiting so long to properly tend to those wounds - the bleeding was staunched but the longer time untreated meant increased risk of infection. But he also recognized the psychological needs presented.) “You can’t just strip me naked just like that. I’m fine, really. It’s just a few scrapes.”

“Are you worried about me seeing you unclothed?” Al-an tilted his head and if he had brows, they’d definitely be furrowed. It seemed like a pretty moot issue at this point in time, and as much as he wanted to understand her, he was at a loss. “I feel the risk of infection is far greater than whatever risk myself seeing you ‘naked’ brings.”

“Yeah,” Robin huffed in annoyance, “Then leave so I can tend to myself.” She closed her eyes before continuing. “It’s really, really not okay to see someone naked in most human cultures unless I’m literally incapacitated or dying and it’s a huge emergency. And I’m not dying.”

Al-an was at a loss for words. Seriously? That’s what she was worried about? When he had questioned her, he was unsure that he was actually hitting the nail on the head - but apparently he had.

He said nothing as he stood up and slowly walked out of the room. He found himself in the observatory, staring out in the direction of where they had just come.

He should not have placed her on his back, at least not without the support of his anti-gravity beam. If he had put in the care to carry her with that instead of relying on his physical form, she wouldn’t have fallen off. He would have been able to blink across the ice worm’s path and they wouldn’t have been stopped. She wouldn’t have gotten hurt.

Al-an watched a school of bladder fish swim by. He was supposed to protect Robin while they were there - she’d spent the entirety of her time with him in her head protecting Al-an and now he’s allowed her to get hurt under his watch, mere days after becoming autonomous again. He couldn’t go a few days without Robin getting hurt?

The guilt he felt was palpable and he considered if her overreaction was a result of her anger towards his negligence rather than what she had presented was the case. He walked around unclothed and she had never complained - perhaps it was a more severe issue than he had assumed? Was he making her uncomfortable?

He sat there for a while, absorbed in his thoughts as he watched the world outside.

—————————————————————

Robin exhaled a shaky sigh as she unzipped her wetsuit. She stripped it off carefully, making sure not to take the gauze off with it. Al-an had tied it on tight, which was thankfully helping stop the bleeding, but it felt uncomfortable.

She slid off the side of the bed and put pressure on her good leg, hobbling (with the help of furniture) off to the bathroom.

She opened the medicine cabinet and extracted a bottle of iodine and some more gauze. She carefully unwrapped her leg and applied a generous amount of the substance onto it, hissing at the sting.

As she worked on re-wrapping her wound, she thought.

She shouldn’t have snapped at Al-an. He was only trying to help, and to be honest, it would’ve been easier to deal with if he was taking care of her right now.

But… she didn’t want him to see her naked, injured, and vulnerable. That wasn’t who she was.

And it only complicated her thoughts further as she cut the gauze and tightened it around her leg, considering how she would’ve reacted if a doctor was the one taking her clothes off and treating her. She wouldn’t have reacted so explosively, so then why would it matter more that it was Al-an? She trusted him. He had been in her head, she was sure he’d seen her in more vulnerable positions than now.

She applied iodine and bandaids to her smaller cuts and scrapes down her side, arm and calf.

She looked at herself in the mirror. Kind of beat up, but she’d be back in business in no time!

She forced a smile. It didn’t help.

She hobbled her way back into her bedroom and made her way over to her closet. She picked out a comfortable shirt and leggings, slipping them on.

Robin sat on her bed and looked out her window into the expanse of the night. Part of her felt guilty - she wanted to call Al-an back and talk to him right then and there about what had happened.

But the other part of her was embarrassed. She didn’t want to make it seem like she was being unreasonable.

She could talk to him in the morning, she concluded. She pulled her blanket up and slid under it, pulling it over her shoulders.

I listened to unused voice lines yesterday and there was a removed line where they discussed the sea monkey's gifting behavior once you obtain Al-an. I like to think that they just had the interaction behind the scenes rather than being totally unused, so I wrote this to show my interpretation! Who doesn't love emotional fluff between Robin and her local brain alien <3

Robin had been on 4546B for about a month at this point and she was proud to say that she was starting to learn her way around this freezing hellscape. She was even, dare she say, starting to get used to it – as used to it as she could, anyway. Sure, it was way too cold outside the water (where she unfortunately often found herself led) and she had managed to accidentally pick up a little alien parasite from a storage cube, but she was managing. It was all generally a very uncomfortable experience, but she was surviving.

Today, she swam through the Creepvine Forest, having to gather some resources that she noted seemed more plentiful in this biome compared to others. Despite her circumstances, she did enjoy how pretty everything was (It won’t kill me to at least enjoy the environment, she had reasoned), how the forest was glowing gently with the golden seed pods that sat upon the vines, only accentuated by the dusk overhead. It was like each seed pod was a night light, protecting the forest from the enveloping darkness.

Distracted by the sight, she swam into something. She was startled by the collision and kicked her flippers, propelling herself back so she could see what she’d hit. It was … a sea monkey! She protectively slipped her Seaglide to her back, putting herself between it and the creature. She’d had plenty of experiences with those things in her first few weeks of living around here and if she knew one thing about them, it was that they were really grabby and it was really hard to catch them to get her stuff back. Especially if what they took was her Seaglide.

But the sea monkey seemed to have something different on the mind today. It shook off the confusion from the impact and gave her an open-mouthed smile of excitement as it reached into its pouch and presented her a chunk of gold.

Robin stared at it in shock. At her hesitation the monkey seemed to insist, swimming a little closer and nudging the gift towards her. Robin took it and mumbled the best “thank you” she could through her occupied mouth. The monkey responded with an excited chitter and then swam away, seemingly satisfied. Robin took this, along with the sunset’s complete fade past the horizon, as a sign it was time to go back to base and sleep.

Robin pondered the experience as she swam back towards her makeshift home. She opened the hatch and climbed in, taking her mask and tank off, setting them onto the table she had placed near the entrance. She sucked in a deep breath through her nose, always satisfied when she was able to get off that oxygen tank and breathe as greedily as she wanted. She never knew what she wasn’t appreciating until she took on something that pulled it away from her. She had gone on other adventures before on other planets in her life, sure, but every one was different and took away something uniquely enjoyable while she was there. Like breathing freely. Ugh.

She took the precarious chunk of gold out of her bag and looked at it. It was nothing special, just another chunk of gold, but it was really fascinating how the monkeys had changed their tune. Was it just that one monkey? Maybe he missed the memo instructing all the monkeys to be mean and thefty towards her.

“Do you like your gift rock?” That voice in her head she’d never get used to, Al-an, spoke up. He was eager to engage in conversation now that she seemed idle. There was a tinge of amusement in his voice.

“Huh?” Robin inquired, before realizing he was talking about her chunk of gold. “Oh, uh… yeah, I guess.” She was definitely happier with this new arrangement, much better to receive gifts than be stolen from, but still wondered why things had changed. Perhaps they’d finally noticed the scraps of unusable metal she’d been leaving out for them and they had decided to ally with her?

“Your interpretation of this interaction is intriguing. You seem to find the sea monkey’s behavior strange.”

“Well, yeah. I can’t believe they brought me a gift. They always liked to steal, and now they’ve completely changed their tune. It is strange.” Robin looked at her chunk of gold with a slight expression of fondness as she sat on her bed. She placed it on her nightstand. It may just be another chunk of gold, but it was a gift.

She yawned and laid her head on her pillow as Al-an responded. “That is odd.” he said plainly.

“Right? I’m thinking they noticed the shiny scraps I left out for them. That’s my running theory.” Robin turned over in bed and sighed, pulling the covers up to her shoulders. The lights in the room dimmed and she drew her attention to her window, observing the pretty view – she had placed that window directly facing the Creepvine forest. It was the prettiest thing around, especially at night. Not the safest thing to explore in the dark, so it was much nicer to see it from the comfort of her bed.

“No, I don’t find it odd that they are giving you gifts. I find it odd that they had initially been stealing from you.” Al-an hummed thoughtfully before continuing. “They’ve always been providing to us. I would always have to designate space for their gifts when I knew I would be passing them.”

“Hmm?” Robin questioned curiously, raising an eyebrow. She really did not think those monkeys had it in them and she was surprised to learn that to Architects, it was just how the monkeys behaved. “Are you suggesting they’re only being nice because you’re in my brain?”

“…Would it be undesirable if there were benefits to traveling with me?”

“Hey! Don’t oversell yourself, it’s not like they brought me anything useful.” Robin rolled her eyes. She was sure Al-an didn’t actually know when she was doing that, but she hoped he did because she sure found herself doing it a lot when he spoke.

“How is a sea monkey to know what you need? I have read your PDA in its entirety and I don’t know what you need.” Al-an objected, seemingly indignant at his perceived maltreatment of the monkeys. Robin giggled and his annoyance seemed to melt away.

“Keep your nose out of my PDA, Al-an.” Robin teased.

“We Architects do not have noses as you do, but your point is nonetheless understood.”

A comfortable silence passed between them. Robin grew sleepier as she watched the world outside her window settle into its own slumber. She yawned and pulled her sheets closer. Al-an noticed her heartrate falling and sleep fast approaching, but he decided to elaborate on one last thing before he missed his chance.

“I accepted the gifts each time. I did not want to seem ungrateful.” He spoke quietly, gently. Then he added, “It is very useful to make allies, no matter how unlikely, or perhaps inconvenient.”

Robin considered it for a moment, slightly roused from her tiredness as she considered what Al-an had said. She spoke gently, too, as she replied. “The things we see as inconvenient are usually not always that way. I’ll use that gold the next time I have to make a computer chip, their gift saved me a trip.” She let out a tired hum before thinking of one more thing to say. “I hope I can be grateful, too. Sometimes I think I forget to show it.”

She could feel an understanding warmth radiate from Al-an’s presence, almost like a smile. More silence passed and she could feel her eyes grow heavier, breathing grow slower. He could feel it too.

Softly, in almost a murmur, he responded. “I wonder what gift would make you truly happy. Perhaps if you indicated your needs more often, they would be easier to fulfill.”

Al-an clicked in a slow and calculated fashion, a deep growl emanating from his chest as he pushed Robin up against a wall, claws greedily exploring her body over her shirt - but they both suspected that wouldn’t last long. Robin trembled, but very clearly not with fear - rather, anticipation. An anticipation so raw and apprehensive, heartbeat quickened with not just the situation, but the implications it had. Her mind was blank and her heart did most of her thinking for her… along with her nether regions, of course.

“I see,” the mighty Architect purred, still an undertone of a growl present, “that you may not understand the intricacies of Architect sexuality. Forgive me for neglecting to inform you, Robin…” and he drew her name out in a suggestive and aggressive way that made her knees feel weak, something that wasn’t causing issues in her current predicament.

“Y-Yeah?” Robin managed through a thick swallow, staring into Al-an’s eyes (or at least where she assumed they were…) with lust and feigned fear. It wasn’t a conscious decision to include the look of fright, but it seemed to be what her subconscious decided would feed into his predatory gaze best - and it was correct.

“Let me,” Al-an lifted her shirt, draping it over her shoulders before disposing of it at his feet, allowing it to fall with little regard to its landing site, “inform you, Robin. Would you like to know more?” and he asked his question with a sort of sinister arousal, something primal that indicated he already knew her answer.

Robin could only nod gently, wide-eyed and cheeks heavily flushed. She was a lovely sight, Al-an thought with a passionate trill, topless but still sporting her leggings. Something about the way her hips were outlined by the elastic of her pants while her breasts hung freely… it made him want to explore.

Al-an wasted no time in delving his face into her neck and allowing his purrs to vibrate against it. Through simple haptics, he was able to isolate quick vibrations where roughly he assumed he would have a mouth - something that he knew delighted Robin, and he understood why. Kissing was something very important in romantic relationships according to his knowledge on human culture, and as she melted underneath him and felt her pulse beneath her skin, he could not have understood the fascination more. He traced kisses down the side of her neck as he felt her breasts with one of his free pincers, using the other to hold her by the hair, close to the scalp, in order to keep her facing him.

“We do not experience a desire to copulate for the sake of reproduction,” Al-an purred as he nuzzled his forehead against hers, an action that kept Robin’s face hot and eyes wide. “As you understand, we Architects do everything with a purpose. And our purpose for copulation is pleasure, of course, but also to nourish our connection, one more personal than the network brings.” The way he had idly been playing with her nipples was killing her, but the way he now stopped, claws hovering over her as he gently stroked her hair? Drove her crazy.

“Robin, I must inquire, do you desire to nourish this connection with me?” A deep series of clicks rumbled from within his chest as he spoke now, voice thicker. “I would not be asking if I did not feel I needed the bond, yes, but also the physicality of the ordeal.”

Wow. Robin’s mind, which was one second ago completely stagnant, now raced as she considered the implications of what he was telling her, what he was asking of her. He was… inexplicably pent up. He saw their relationship and cherished it in such a way that he desired this pleasure, this connection. Her sensitive zone seemed to throb a response before she could even articulate it, but finally she managed to choke out a “Yes.”

“Very.” Al-an pulled her closer to him as he lowered his face to her breasts, curiously exploring them along with those same haptic kisses he practiced on her neck earlier. “Well.” His voice dripped with both lust and affection as he drew out the phrase of affirmation.

And then it seemed like he could bear this teasing no longer (and neither could Robin, but she had a feeling he would’ve kept going if he could) as he finally slipped her pants off in one quick motion.

With one of his mechanical hands, he rubbed idle circles in the center of her underwear where he knew the most nerve endings sat close to the skin. He was delighted at the way her breath hitched and eyes fluttered, but he was unsatisfied with how she still seemed to be holding back. He slid her panties down and took them off as well, leaving her naked beneath him. He observed it, glowing a careful green before returning to his lustful magenta. Naked, he noted, but not yet trembling. Such is essential for this situation. This will not do.

With that thought, Al-an returned his face to her neck in a flash to trace it once more with pseudo-kisses as he allowed his erection to emerge from its usual hiding spot. He separated from her for just a moment, to allow her wide eyes to view it, before connecting with her again in a flash, this time stimulating her warmth with his own as he ground against her - focusing on the raw nerves at her clitoris and her entrance, relishing the slippery wetness that covered his tip. A direct result of her eagerness, that he was causing.

Robin was aware of the heat emanating off of him, like a flame just close enough to warm but not to burn. She couldn’t help but bite her lip, swollen with desire and her repeated lickings, as she struggled to keep her vocalized pleasure stifled. Why she was attempting to hold it back she did not know, it just felt right. But to Al-an it was very, extremely, marvelously frustrating. And a challenge.

Al-an’s purr continued rumbling throughout his core, clicks and chitters sprinkled over it as he positioned himself at her entrance. “Brace yourself,” he said playfully.

“D-Don’t oversell yours-“ Robin gasped as he entered her, his member filling her in all the right places. She felt full, but somehow empty as she craved for him to start moving. She couldn’t hold back her moan as he slid all the way in, passing her internal bundle of nerves (which Al-an noted with delight) and meeting the wall which was her cervix.

He allowed her a moment to adjust, but selfishly it was more to create a tension - he wanted to see how she would react if he simply did not give into her desires. She whined slightly with need, and although Al-an would’ve otherwise kept this research going to see how far he could take her (perhaps he could even get her begging), he was admittedly very needy himself. He groaned with pleasure as he took his first quick thrust out - then back in.

A scientist, he regarded himself with pride, who analyzes data in even the most extraneous of circumstances. And he purposefully ignored how it became harder for him to think as well as Robin’s scattered moans fell over him with his more erratic thrusts.

But quickly, as he began learning her inner mechanisms - mostly through all that moaning of hers which was short-circuiting his brain - he settled into a rhythm they were both deeply enjoying. He withdrew his cock slower than he pumped it in, and he noted how he felt her pulse and clench around him with an increased frequency so long as he maintained this style. He tried to keep from making any groans and grunts of his own, but it was more than a little hard to catch them before they happened.

For Al-an, everything seemed, for once, so loud and so quiet at the same time - like a perfect balance that reminded him dearly of the network he was once a part of, a melody in the background as his mind featured in the foreground. But it felt different. Very different, and very unique. This felt like a careful bonding between himself and his mate, but one that he did not have to worry about keeping together. It felt like no matter how hard he thrusted into her or how hard he held her, there was no risk of their mental adhesion faltering. He had not felt romance or passion in this intimate capacity before meeting Robin, and perhaps that’s why he was all the more eager to begin experiencing it.

He felt so utterly sated but also hungry, hungry for more of Robin’s moans to grace his ears (moans which were becoming more and more frantic as she approached climax), for Robin’s warm and wet depths to continue squeezing him in all the right ways, for more pleasure of his own. And although he was not often selfish in the face of his human, he felt it justified for himself to so desperately desire what she clearly also did.

He maintained his pace with an instinctual guidance, pumping in and out and in and out as Robin moaned his name. “Al-an,” her voice was shaky and wavering, pleading. And well, if that wasn’t encouragement, what was?

Al-an lost himself in the pleasurable motions, clenching his pincers around her hair and squeezing her where he had his arm wrapped around her.

He couldn’t help now but groan as his coloration took on a white hue and he reached his peak - falling over the edge perhaps less gracefully than he would’ve liked. His cum, which was perhaps vestigial considering the circumstances but very welcomed by Robin, filled her sloppily as she was pushed over her own edge. Through moans of Al-an’s names and pleading for more, she was enveloped by her own powerful orgasm.

As they both came down from their climax they panted, Al-an once again pressing his forehead affectionately against hers. He truly did not need to pant, he literally did not have a respiratory system, but he felt it appropriate for the circumstance, and honestly he somehow did feel winded after such an experience. He removed himself from inside her and felt a strange pleasure feeling how sticky her inside felt coated in his cum.

Al-an released her finally from his anti-gravitational beam, but he did not let her fall. He had his arms wrapped around her waist and continued to purr and click affectionately as he nuzzled and kissed her lovingly. He smothered her with this wordless affection, but she loved it.

After some silence in which they remained in their right embrace, Robin spoke.

“So,” she cleared her throat and tried again, “so what was all that about?” Perhaps it wasn’t the most romantic thing she could’ve said but she really was curious, it was not like her Architect to be so dominant and forthcoming - let alone have sex with her! She just had sex with an alien!!!

“Robin, did you not listen to my explanation of Architect sexuality?” He seemed to be gently and playfully scolding her, recognizing that she was likely not listening very well during his prior explanation.

“Not really… I was kind of preoccupied…” Robin leaned her head onto his shoulder and pressed her cheek into it, sighing happily.

“Let me summarize. We are overwhelmed with a desire for this important experience when we feel we are ready to consummate our bond.” Al-an trilled thoughtfully for a moment and Robin thought he would leave it there, but he did continue.

ryley: