Because you're Gay.

                     "That’s because I could, and I do, and I enjoy every second of it.”

                   "Good shit. Guys are trash, myself included. By and large we basically deserve to be beaten up."

    "Oh please, do tell me more about just how much you dig it. I’m oh so interested."

         "I like your style. You look like you could beat the fuck out of some dudes and make them like, hard but bloody at the same time? It's great."

          “Yer the one that jumps at the chance to talk ‘bout my dick.                                                                                             Get the fuck outta’ my face.”

         "To be fair, I talk about dicks a lot. Mostly to be sure that everyone around me knows that their dick--however impressive it may be--will never actually be as big as my dick. It's good for people to know their place in the world. And my place is atop the throne. King of all dicks. I was chosen, like some Sword in the Stone type shit."

first round of jdate flower crowns uwu

suck my dick

        "You'd like that, wouldn't you?                        You're gayer than Dave, swear to fuck."

                               Actually Jay just cleaned                                           it so it is not that bad.

           "That sucks dick, dude.                                  Like. Passionately."

          “If ya want me to whip it out, just say so.                                                                                                         We’ll see whose is bigger, jackass.”

                "Dude, don't make it gay.                              I'm just sayin'."

-

{x}

"John you can’t just ask if people are going to turn into snakes"