(SAMI WAX)

he told me that out of everything in his life i’m the only stable thing going he told me that i’m beautiful and kind and smart and funny and every other thing i could never tell myself i just laughed and didn't know what to say so i kissed him yes although it’s good to feel wanted it is hard to remember back to the last time i felt like i deserved it i wanted to tell him i was a mess he didn’t need to get tangled up in but sometimes it’s just an excuse an excuse for fear for being scared to be vulnerable to allow someone else to curl their body around you closing the open parentheses you left on the other side of the bed i wanted to tell him that i wanted to be around him and that the way dammit just the way he looked at me like i was some work of art studying me and taking in every last detail he made me feel like i finally deserved it