you are an experience

gay porn is the great equalizer

i think u should always give characters more body hair just because. its good for the health its good for the everything

we need to invent a spray tan-style treatment but instead of spraying you with tanning stuff it sprays you with heavy duty spf. and it lasts a few weeks so that way you can just get your spf spray a few times a summer instead of having to spend 10 minutes every day getting sticky and oily and making sure the sunscreen is all rubbed in. how do i get on shark tank

marauders/harry potter fans who "don't agree with jk rowling" are like if people loved the leopard mascot for the leopards eating peoples faces party so they wore all the merch and drew art of the mascot and talked about the leopard mascot all the time but don't worry! they don't support the leopards eating peoples faces party! they're just completely indistinguishable from people who do because they both love the leopard mascot and make loving the leopard mascot 99% of their personality, "why do people feel unsafe around me when i very clearly don't support the leopards eating peoples faces party?" says the person in the leopards eating peoples faces party merch (don't worry they bought it second hand so the leopards eating peoples faces party don't get any money from them)

found a rock in the kitchen and as I was about to throw it in the trash I thought "wait this is cruel I should let it outside" as if it was a living thing

tbh people don't give zuko enough credit like wtf are you supposed to say when someone hits you with "my girlfriend turned into the moon" like. damn. that is in fact rough buddy

“Jobless behavior” when referring to people who are absolutely deranged on the internet is so far removed from reality like I guarantee you most people who are obsessively unhinged have a job that is driving them to become absolutely insane because they are miserable and likely don’t have the energy to do much outside of whatever outlet they’re using to take their frustrations out on the internet. Employed behavior

do you guys also have the urge to kill yourselves if you're not good at something on the first try or are you normal

[ID: a tweet by pete punctuated with multiple sad teary eyed emojis throughout which reads: "oh poor baby . do you need the robot to make you pictures? . yeah? . do you need the bo-bot to write you essay too? yeah ??? you can't do it?? . you're a moron? . do you need chat gpt to fuck your wife ?? ." /End ID]

Cock ring? Well are you gonna answer it?

I love texting someone on discord and seeing the gray activity notice turn green. Look at your phone boy

POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS: i am not a creep. i am not a weirdo. i do know what the hell i’m doing here. i do belong here

shout out to the 🧍 emoji. it conveys so much. no other way to truly explain the emotion you get when you feel like🧍

blowjob? more like nojob! #unemployed