salma’s

Now I’m not some relationship expert, but I believe teenagers can fall in love.

When adults say teenagers don’t really fall in love, that it’s a matter of hormones, I don’t think they’re intentionally trying to dismiss your feelings. From my perspective, the meaning of love and one’s views and opinions and ideas on it change several times during a life time. But it doesn’t mean what you were feeling 2 years ago wasn’t love. It’s not love based on your current (new) view and idea on it. And people can argue that they have different views and opinions and endless perspectives on what love is.

A teenager can fall in love with someone’s actions and personality and looks. And just because you (as an adult) didn’t end up with the person you fell in love with as a teenager, it doesn’t mean you weren’t in love. Love isn’t all what makes a relationship and people can fall in love romantically more than once, in my personal opinion of course.

While I say this, i believe some teenagers often confuse infatuation with love, they can confuse being in love with the idea of somebody and being in love with the person— just like adults do sometimes. but I don’t believe I know enough to write about it, yet.

I never really understood why good people choose to tolerate and stay with bad people. Not just romantically, but platonically too. Why they choose to stay after the other end walks over them and disrespects them, because “they’re good friends” most of the time—that was what I was told by one of my friends.

I never understood what Mr. Anderson meant until a few days ago. Do you really think that’s the love you deserve? I wish I could make you see yourself from my eyes, you deserve so much better. It’s a matter of self respect now because do you really think you deserve that low of a value?

There are actions I can get by and forgive, but there’s also actions I cannot forgive, it doesn’t matter if it was the first time had it happened.

For me, even though I’m a relatively shy, ‘sweet’ (not my words) person, that doesn’t mean you can even think you can walk over me and cross my boundaries and expect me not to cut you off. You’ll never hear a word from me, and you’ll never know anything about my life again. Because I know I deserve better no matter how insecure, how worthless I can feel sometimes.

Do you really hate yourself so much that you choose to stay no matter how much crap gets thrown at you? Do you not think you can find better people?

What happened to enjoying music because it makes you feel something? Because it makes you feel good?

I can be a fan of a band without knowing their names, who they married, when they lost their first tooth, and when they died. I’m simply a fan of the product they release. The music they make. I also don’t have to love every song they release to call myself a fan of an artist.

And no I’m not going to name you 10 songs because it’s none of your business. I get it when some people want to ‘gate keep’ their ‘niche’ artists and music but it’s not okay to bully the ‘basic’ people for discovering it and liking it. Just because they don’t fit the supposed ‘style’ or whatever that’s called doesn’t mean they can’t enjoy the song. So what if it’s the most popular song of that band? So what if they can’t name 4 other songs? What if they discovered it through TikTok? As long as they like the song and it makes them happy, it’s non of your business. I genuinely feel so bad for those people when I see the ‘niche cool weird kids’ or whatever fill their comment sections with weird spiteful comments. As if they’re not worthy enough of listening to that ‘niche’ artist.

It’s just simply unfair that we can’t pursue our dream jobs because they’re not as reliable and financially stable as law, med, or engineering.

I have to remind myself everyday that I can’t risk it and I must choose a safer job. But I cannot help but think about how we only live once. And that it’s truly a waste if I don’t use the built up passion I have for this specific, ‘unrealistic’, ‘childish’ path. It’s so unfair. It’s makes me depressed

I don’t even know what major I’ll be choosing. The fig tree theory haunts me.

I keep saying this every time I think about it but the fact that I’m graduating soon makes me even more anxious.