Grapefruit

an oversized pantera t-shirt (jason’s) keeps you barely warm and a pair of old panties hug your ass. you stop, arms crossed against your chest and you bounce your right leg in sleeping agitation.

there he is. jason todd. your ex-boyfriend. this is not shocking. you knew he would show up, eventually. he stands inside your kitchen as if he still lives here: his muddy leather boots set at the entrance, jacket on the coat hanger, mask and dirty gloves thrown on the floor.

it’s been a while since jason last showed up. three weeks, to be more precise. you’ve been keeping count. every day. ever since your last encounter on the fire escape, your heart’s been aching heavy inside your chest; missing him and what you used to have.

knowing jason, you bet he’s snuck inside your apartment more than you could ever imagine. watching you sleep. using your shower. dozing off on your couch for a few hours. reading your books. you swear he’s been messing around with your plushies. he’s been hiding gifts inside your house or leaving bouquets of flowers on your dinning table. last time, you had no choice, but write him a note on a small piece of paper:

‘DEAR JASON PETER TODD,

stop breaking into my apartment. i’m SERIOUS!!!

(thanks for the flowers) ’

to which he replied with a note placed on your fridge, yours kept in his inside pocket.

‘DEAR EX-GIRLFRIEND,

stop leaving so many dishes in your sink.

ALSO, jason jr. was hungry. he was crying.

you’re very welcome.’

jason jr. your soft, cute plush puppy. you picked the name and your ex-boyfriend loved it.

─── Ი︵𐑼 EX-BOYFRIEND JASON TODD .ᐟ who stands over the stove, with his broad shoulders and muscular back, hugged by a tight black t-shirt, a strong hand gripped around a pan handle and a spoon full of red sauce stuffed in his mouth. this view, you took it for granted and the realization hits you immediately.

you used to sit on that counter at midnight while he spoon fed you and cooked for you. some nights, you’d wait for him to come back from his nightly patrols, windows wide open, because you knew he’d never in his life use the front door.

“jay, the door is right there.”

he used to wrap you arms around your waist and press his lips on top of your head and his mouth would wander down your neck, soft breaths hiking up your skin.

“and the window is right here.”

you used to feel something. but you won’t take him back and it’s a painful truth you are both aware of.

the kitchen drowns in the smell of tomatoes, meat and freshly chopped garlic. some vegetables rest on a cutting board while he waltzes the ingredients around with the spoon in his mouth.

“mornin’, sunshine. took you look enough to get out of bed.” his senses are sharp, quick. he doesn’t have to turn around, he’s heard you toss and turn in your bed.

“christ, jason, it’s 4am. what are you doing here?” you rub your eyes and make your way across the kitchen.

“cooking pasta. hungry, babe?”

“jason, please. what are you doing here?”

─── Ი︵𐑼 EX-BOYFRIEND JASON TODD .ᐟ who makes you climb up the kitchen countertop with your legs wrapped around his large frame, one scarred hand firmly gripped around your plump ass. the other, he sneaks it underneath your t-shirt, playing with your boobs. the kiss is too aggressive; two mouths crashed against each other with the most primal need.

hunger.

hell, he’s been spending his time thinking about you, sulking or with a hand fisted around his cock until he couldn’t cum anymore.

jason wants you now and you need him more and more and more. there’s too much space between you and nothing can fill it up, unless you really want to. unless you claw onto his body like it’s the only way to keep living. your clothed clit rubs against jason’s body and you hold onto his t-shirt, pulling him closer and closer and closer.

this is the last time. he’s been gone for three weeks, but every day, he’s been thinking about you. your relationship ended four months ago. this will be the last time. and then, he’ll let you be.

“i worry about you all the time, y’know, jay-”

“you worry about me, huh?” he interrupts.

“you know i do!”

his fingers motion sweetly around you clit, teasing your soft spot through the soaked fabric of you panties. you part your lips, still stuck to his and every moan falls muffled into his mouth.

“ and i-i miss you. but you can’t keep sneaking up like this!”

“give me a solid reason and i’ll do it, doll.” he pulls your panties to the side and his fingers dip straight into the wetness between your thighs, sweet folds stretching nicely around him.

you’ve missed it so much.

“ jason, i- you feel so good inside me. but- you have to stop this. i hate it!”

“hate what?”

“my life without you.” you cry, “i can’t stand the way you come and go,” and you moan, fingers inside you, “you know we can’t be together.”

─── Ი︵𐑼 EX-BOYFRIEND JASON TODD .ᐟ who forgets about his food, because there’s a different type of hunger burning inside him. who fucks you with your hands pressed against the countertop; he squeezes your thighs shut together, letting you feel how thick and big his cock is— how good it feels to be filled up to the brim and be loved by him. how amazing it feels to miss him and finally get him like this.

there’s no surface in the kitchen and livingroom left untouched.

he spreads your legs wide open on the dinning table, pulling you closer to the edge with his calloused hands locked around your ankles. the perfect meal. he makes you sit on top of his body and your hips roll, while he sits with his arms behind his head, strong muscles flexing and veins pulsing, watching how deep he sinks inside your cunt. he likes it when you turn greedy, mindlessly digging your nails in his chest, eyes rolling in illicit pleasure when you come on his cock.

“that’s my pretty girl.”

“rough night?” you use a fork to play around with the leftovers pasta, but you’re no longer hungry. you sit at the dinning table next to jason and suddenly, a feeling of wholeness takes over you. but this feeling will go away as soon as he leaves early in the morning.

jason is staying over tonight. a part of you wants to invite him in your bed and let his body press into yours, arms around your waist, warm, cozy. he’ll sleep on the couch and this decision to push him away makes your heart ache.

“not anymore.”

now that he’s with you.

“you look like shit, jay.” you bury your face in the nape of his neck, placing a soft kiss.

and you look just as beautiful as ever, he thinks.

“go shower before i change my mind. you’re not getting in our bed like this.”

ours.

you promised yourself he’ll sleep on the couch.

“yes, ma’am.” he mumbles, stuffing more pasta in his mouth.

he takes a brief pause and then, he continues, suddenly so shy, “wanna join me?”

it’s impossible to escape your ex-boyfriend, jason todd. he always finds his way back to you, like a sick, needy puppy.