A Formal Apology (written for @ratchetmonstax ‘s lil writing event)
naga!shownu x reader (no warnings just a lil emotional i am a pisces moon after all)
the dry grass brushed against your back, tickling uncomfortably as you shifted against the cold ground. it was a still night, calm. the most tranquil night you could imagine after the many events that had plagued you since a certain naga entered your life. speaking of the creature, his presence next to you was not forgotten despite his silence. he was radiating a comforting heat that helped you combat the cold.
“hey, (y/n)?” shownu’s voice called out softly.
“yes, shownu?” you responded.
“i have a question for you.” his voice wavered slightly.
“ask it.” you replied simply, allowing your silence to prompt him to speak.
“did i ever like, formally apologize to you?” shownu fidgeted with his hands as he spoke, his dry scales making a scratching sound as they rubbed together in the quiet night.
“no...” you trailed, “but for what?”
“for killing your family.” he answered plainly.
oh. that. you obviously hadn’t forgotten, but dwelling on it only made you sick with sadness, so you often busied yourself and pushed the memory away. but hearing the creature who had done such damage to you bring the experience back up had cut you deeper than you’d been cut since the night itself.
“o-oh.” you choked out, not being able to stop the tears that sprung to your eyes.
“well, i’m gonna say it now.” shownu turned to face you and took a deep breath, preparing. “i’m very sorry for killing your family. i know i had my reasoning, but when i think about it lately, i don’t remember the reasons. i’m sure they were innocent. they had to have been if they were related to you. i don’t remember much about them in the moments before their bones were being crushed by my fangs, but i remember your mom had eyes like yours and your dad had a nose like yours. and i know you loved them. and maybe i would’ve too. but, i ruined that, and i’m sorry. i don’t think that you’re going to forgive me, but i’m still asking for your forgiveness, because the more i think about it, i feel bad. i don’t know a whole lot about human emotions but i think they call this guilt? yeah, guilt. i feel guilt because of my actions and i’m sorry and i want you to forgive me.” shownu rambled, the scratching of his scales reaching a crescendo as he spoke.
“oh, um, oh.” you were too busy wiping tears from your eyes to speak properly, so you took a weak inhale and made another attempt at speaking. “you’re right, i can’t forgive you. y-you took away the people that m-mattered most to me. but i-i appreciate you being mature and apologizing t-to me. it does mean lot.” you finished, taking a deep breath and slumping into yourself. suddenly, you felt a heavy weight against your body that made you straighten back up again, and you realized shownu had wrapped himself around you, his head now resting lightly atop yours.
“you’re welcome for the apology. i also have another question, if you don’t mind.” he whispered.
“yeah? what’s that?” you breathed deep to calm yourself as you waited for his voice to fill your ears.
“i was wondering if we could be friends? i know i killed your family and all, and i know deep down you probably really hate me, but i like to spend time with you and i think you are very comforting.” shownu cleared his throat awkwardly as the last word left his mouth.
“oh, um, i mean, sure? it’s going to take a while for me to fully trust you, but we can work towards it. i don’t know about friends quite yet, but we can be more than not friends, if that makes sense?” you suggested.
“hmm...” shownu tried the thought out in his mind, and decided it was better than nothing. “more than not friends, i’ll take it!” shownu wrapped himself around you a little tighter.
“cool.” you said with a smile. “it’s getting pretty late, i’m gonna go back into the house and wash up.” you announced. “see you tomorrow?”
“see you tomorrow! thanks for accepting my apology, more than not friend!” shownu yelled out at you as you walked across the field, and you could hear the smile in his voice. so you turned around, flashed him the most noticeable smile you could in the dark of the night, waved frantically and yelled,
“you’re welcome, more than not friend!”
