Cancer Rage Documentation:
There’s this emotion which I don’t think many people have, I even have slight doubts that I am the only one.
This emotion is like a weird corrupted version of anger. Instead of clenching fists, I put my hands in a tense claw position. Instead of frowning, I do a wide, manic, smile, showing my teeth.
Somewhat similar to this photo ⬇️
This was during the Formed phase of this emotion, as it has taken another form, which I’ll talk about in the next section. But the Formed phase was the one which stands out the most.
The other phases are, in chronological order:
-Undefined era; ????-mid 2022
-Blurry phase; end of 2022 to 2023
-Superposition phase; end of 2024 to Now
You might notice some overlap in the dates, but that’s because I didn’t take notes and only based this estimate on drawings and text I made while in crisis of Rage. Which are somewhat hard to date.
Names are nice and all but we need descriptions, right?
-Undefined era: this is when the rage didn’t take on any form yet, I was just… angry
-Blurry era: this is when the rage started taking form, but it wasn’t finished/settled. This is also when Rage got its first name coined by me: the administrator. I named it that since it was restraining my speech, like an administrator.
-Formed era: this is when Rage took its first “physical” form, the cancer symbol ♋️. It is also when I started the facial expressions I talked about in the beginning of this post.
-Superposition era: that one is the one I’m currently in. This is when I have taken superior control over Rage and used its energy to emulate multiple instances of my mind, in a quantum superposition kind of way.
Superposition is by far the most powerful, as I have been able to use Rage for energy.
Unfortunately, it is also the most dangerous phase, as even if I have taken control over my emotions, they can still manipulate me, thus creating a positive feedback loop.
Although I have never gone fully mental during the Superposition phase, this next problem, I have.
Superposition as also another issue, if I don’t interact with the world with intent of communication, my mind can duplicate, again, and agin, and again… and again… until it is just a brouarah of thoughts.
It can happen at any moment, it only needs a question that doesn’t have an answer.
I will do more post going further into my research.
If anyone had or has similar experiences, please share them as I dearly need to know I’m not the only one living with this “emotion”
dededos
dailybridgerton
baratheonpilled
kianamaiart
