Shadows And Steel

Sortithe-  Journal Entry 2, New

This face isn't my face. It's a pretty face, but every time I look in the mirror, it's strange. Foreign. I didn't expect to ever see skin so flawless again. I didn't expect to wake up after what I'd done. But there I was, in that strange little cottage, filled with books and bottles and I could hear a faint bubbling somewhere. I didn't wait for who ever it had been. I ran. 

I itched. My whole body felt like it was crawling. I lay in a ditch for four days, screaming and sweating as the addiction to some substance's withdrawals. No one stopped. No one even looked at me. I was nobody to them. Just another addict. The left me to die. 

But I didn't die. On the fifth day, I woke up and I walked out of that ditch. I took the long way to the Villa. Abandoned. Bronvys Steeldawn had left it. Did Rowaena know? Did she care? Surely she revealed herself to him. All of Billie's work, left by that ungrateful blonde. Typical Rowaena. I took to the old manor, collected some of Rowaena's abandoned clothing and went to find her.

---

"Do I really mean nothing to you?"

"I never meant to hurt you!"

"You are worth less than dirt to me."

"We could have been happy together..."

"I should've protected you!"

"Will you stay with me till I'm gone?"

"Don't leave me here, please!"

"It was my fault... it was all my fault!"

"I don't want to die-!"

"Please give me another chance!"

"It's okay... I wasn't meant to survive this."

"Please forgive me..."

"I'm dying and you can't stop it."

"You're dying and I can't stop it!"

"I only came to say goodbye."

"Stay with me!"

"I thought you loved me. I was wrong."

"I thought I loved you. I was wrong."

"Please don't hurt me!"

"I don't want to see you."

"I'm so sorry..."

"I'm ending it tonight. Don't try to stop me..."

"What did you do to yourself?"

"You can't just tell me to leave!"

"This wasn't meant to work out, you know."

"It's too hard. It's just too hard..."

"I was stupid to think you cared."

Me with Rowaena, four days old

Sortithe: Journal Entry 1, Sisters

Text on the back of the photo reads: Sortithe Pyreheart (left), Ebillien Forscythe (right), Spring; Y. 203

Everyone always thought that Billie and me were related. When we were girls, we liked to tell people we were twins. But it just wasn't true, Billie was older than me by almost seven months.

As an only child, Billie and her family were as close as I had. We spent hours on the beach outside the Forscythe Villa, our arms linked as we sang and drank pink lemonade. 

“It's 4 in the morning, is everything ok?”

“Some days I think I'm dying, but I'm really only trying to get through.”

“I think the house is spinning.”

“So, we'll try again and eventually we'll get it right.”

“I'm trying to tell you I love you.”

“I can be perfect for you.”

“I miss the pain.”

“Nothing's real.”

“I didn't know you had a brother.”

“He's been dead 16 years.”

“This is fucked.”

“I know you're hurting. I am, too.”

“Can you tell me what it is you're afraid of?”

“Can I touch you?”

“Are you wanting all that she can't give?”

“I am the one who won't walk away.”

“I wish I could fly, I'd fly far away from here.”

“I love you as much as I can.”

“I'm your worst fear, you'll find it in me.”

“I need you to need me.”

“It's not going to get better, is it?”

“Are you nervous?”

“What's your story?”

“Did you see my parents out there?”

“How could she leave me on my own?”

“Why didn't you take me with you?”

“You're kidding, right? That's bullshit.”

“What makes you think I'd lose my mind for you?”

“Tell me why I wait through the night.”

“I can't get through this alone.”

“Am I feeling what I think I'm feeling?”

“I'm good as gone.”

“You don't remember any of this?”

“I thought you might call.”

“Don't say that we're over.”

“I couldn't give a flying fuck what's normal.”

“Your life has kind of sucked, I think.”

“Won't anything be better than before?”

“Your son is gone forever though.”

“There's something missing.”

“Let me know you again.”

“Why do I get denied?”

“Where'd you get that?”

“How could I ever forget?”

Why would you want to remember the things that hurt you?”

“Please, tell me his name.”

“Why stay?”

“Something next to normal would be okay.”

“You look like a star.”

“Can you leave it behind?”

“I might end up crazy.”

“So anyway I'm leaving.”

“It's time for me to go.”

“I am the one who saved you.”

“I know you know who I am.”

“We need some light.”

☹ My muse is visiting your muse on their death bed

♫ A drabble about our muses inspired by the next song that comes on shuffle

☻ A drabble of our muses on their wedding day

☺ my muse trying to piss yours off

ت our muses running into each other after not seeing each other for several years

ヅ for a situation that got both our muses arrested

シ my muse walks in on your naked

Ü your muse walks in on my muse naked

ϡ a goodbye letter from my muse to yours

♥ you muse suprises my muse with a kiss

۵ my muse kisses yours to shut them up

ღ a forehead kiss from my muse

웃 my muse torturing yours for information

유 my muse trying to seduce information from your muse

♈ a holiday drabble featuring our muses

♉ our muses are together when they get ambushed

≑ my muse wakes up in your muse’s body

? my muse will ask your muse a question they always wanted to ask

+ my muse has died and your muse is included in their will

◈ my muse’s reaction to finding your muse beaten and bruised

♊ my muse will do something stupid to impress your muse

✃ your muse visiting mine in the psych ward

♋ my muse visiting yours in the psych ward

❅ my muse rescues yours

✪ my muse seeing the ghost of your muse

● my muse’s turn offs

○ my muse’s turn ons

△ our muse’s get in a playful wrestling match

⍢ my muse gives yours a hickey

✧ our muses having dinner together

☎ my muse drunk dials your muse

✈ our muses on a flight together

☼ my muse giving yours a massage

♡ my muse flirts with your mue

☣ your muse visiting my muse in prison

♌ your muse visiting mine in prison

X my muse doesn’t remember anything from the night before. They have blood on their hands, and your muse is beaten at their feet.

☁ our muses are trapped in a fire together

〰 our muses are at the beach together

❢ my muse has lost their memory, and at the sight of your muse starts to remember things

✑ my muses daily routine

❂ a new years eve memory from my muse

✬ our muses share a new years eve kiss

✆ your muses name, ringtone, and icon in the muse’s phone

◙ a christmas gift from my muse

♍ a sexual story from my muse

₩ our muses are caught in a thunder storm together

❊ a regret my muse has about your muse

♎ your muse tracing one of my muse’s scars

♏ my muse tracing a scar of your muse’s

♐ my muse hearing your muse scream

♑ our muses go out for coffee together

♒ my muse visit’s your muse’s grave

♓ my muse injures your muse

✄ your muse injures my muse

☩ a dream my muse has about your muse

☨ my muse searching for your muse

☦ my muse trying to cheer up your muse

✞ my muse taking care of a your muse while their sick

✛ my muse trying to calm your muse down

✜ my muse trying to get your muse to recover from amnesia

✝ a confession from my muse to yours

✙ our muses shopping together

✠ our muses watching the stars together

« a past memory with our muses

» a daydream my muse has about yours

✐ a mistletoe kiss

✎ our muses going to a costume ball together

✏ our muses are evil and out reaking havoc together

♔ a kiss on the cheek

♕ a kiss on the palms

♖ a kiss on the back of the hand

♗ a kiss on the nose

♘ a kiss on the eyelids