Rooshaney

Be honest with yourself and those around you. Stand, grounded in your truth and current reality. Stop lying and covering your wounds and scars out of fear, opposition, and judgement. Because, whether you like it or not, your truth has already been revealed to those who know and care for you. All of the signs are visible through your apperance, energy, speech, actions, and reactions.

See, your lies blind you but, opens the eyes of others to truly see what's happening. So, you're fooling and hurting no one but yourself in the end. And, the saddest part isn't even the fact that you feel like you need to hide from the world. No, that's a personal problem formed out of your own disbelief of your new reality. The saddest part is you're in this world surrounded by people you claim to love and claim to be in relationship with but don't actually trust nor believe they're capable of accepting the real you, your experience, and the ability to work with and through all things with you.

It can be relationships that are platonic, professional, or romantic - it doesn't matter. You have no faith in them nor the love they have for you, which leads me to believe you also lack the same for yourself - that's the root and the fear. Not that people with correct, judge, try to help, distance, ignore, shun, or abandon you but, that you would probably do the same to yourself because you already know what is and isn't wrong and what you do and do not need or want.

Yet, you can't bring yourself to your own truth...which is...You deserve better than what you continue to allow yourself to have. And you could have it, if only you'll stop punishing yourself for past mishaps and mistakes, forgive yourself and others, heal and recover from the damage, gain some self love and knowledge - knowing your strength and boundaries, while also learning and actually allowing yourself to have all that is yours in this life. But, that's a lot of pressure to handle and apply to yourself. You're so use to failure that you can't even think about such a success in your life; so, you settle - not knowing, you're minimizing yourself and suffering because of it. You're hiding out of shame and guilt of self, no one else. And, that's a hard pill to swallow when you've isolated yourself, refuse to accept the truth for what it is, and continue to feed yourself a lie that no one understands you or cares about you, there's nothing and no one in this world that is better than what you previously had or have, you'll never find better or succeed going further, and you're unworthy of all things good.

—

Humans have perfected the art of excuse. We excuse misconduct as chemical imbalances. We excuse racism as ignorance; sexism as tradition. We excuse murder as insanity. We excuse lies as self-preservationalsim. We excuse slander as the awareness; gossip as truth. We excuse hatred as grief; love as an accident. I think we do this because deep down the truth, the Real Truth—not the Objective Truth, not the Subjective Truth—the Real Truth is embedded in our DNA, trapped in our veins. We can't escape it. We can't outrun it or outmaneuver it. We can't overturn it in a court of law. We can't conceal it with makeup, we can't condemn it with words, we can't contain it with cages or control it whips. So we excuse it, and it ceases to be acknowledged. But our excuses do not make it any less than what it is, just as calling a lion a mosquito would not stop a stampede.