eyes full of stars

[he works in Switzerland because his gf found a job] as friendly chatter, I asked him him, how is it? Are you experiencing culture shock over there?

He goes well my job is remote and I don’t have an office to go to, I mostly just sit here. I’m sure if I left my apartment then I’ll experience some culture shock but no I’m not.

Which ugh dude did you purposely not understand my question!! Did I ask a bad question???

—

[reviewing this label for layout and figuring out where to put country of origin] he wanted feedback on the fact that we change origins when leaving country A and need a sticker for country A and when arrived in country B need to swap out sticker A to sticker B. There’s no obvious location for it so he asked what we thought. This being my specialists, I asked something along the lines of can you place the sticker is two different locations? (Because we’ve had this happen before, we print country B but put country A sticker elsewhere so it’s easy to tear away and no extra work for covering country B). And he’s snaps and sounded very annoyed, goes what do you mean we place in two different place? Why would we need to place in two places? This was my first question by the way and it does not feel good to be spoken to like that.

—

[in critique with packaging designer and director and my manager in the room and discussing small details about an upcoming project] i actually don’t particularly remember specific what we’re talking about but i remember the lead designer was talking about my project and asked a question. Since it’s my project, i started answering and he interrupts me sharply and say no i wasn’t talking to you this is a question for [the packager designer]. Nothing leading up to this would suggest he wasn’t talking to me since i was leading the discussion and proposing questions. And it did feel like a slap in the face and idk if everyone felt the temperature change but i was mad. I mean i also felt like such an imposter too and out of my depth on this project but i was trying to be helpful so it felt both disrespectful and I felt humiliated. I kept my eyes casted down and I hated that I did that.

—

While in Thailand for a work trip. With just the team, no guests or professional and late at night. Most of my teammates were on the roof top of the hotel and drinking and chilling. I decided to put on shorts since it’s dinner time, after a long day and it’s so hot and humid and just us, the team which lean casual. I was shy about it because I hadn’t worn shorts in a long time esp with my weight gain. I thought it was fine but as soon as I stepped off the elevator and found the team, the director immediately told me, in front of everyone, Amanda you should go back and change. You can’t wear shorts to this nice dinner. I didn’t even argue, I just felt embarrassed and turned around and headed back to my room. I thought about high school girls having to deal with this and grateful I am an adult and have a developed frontal lobe to handle this. But then again, I’m still embarrassed when I think about it. It’s just sucks to be spoken to in front of everyone and being hyper aware of your body again. Sure, he wasn’t wrong that I should not have wore something so informal and revealing since it’s still a work thing but the icky feeling is still stuck with me

—