fezco

Vaseline

the anonymity that he doesn’t have - I don’t even know her name, but I was saved by a stranger. isn’t that the fan experience? we don’t know him, but people tell him he saved them over and over again.

the on the brink sensation he’s not allowed to express - the night she talked me down. I imagine it’s challenging to be an eldest sibling, a role model for millions, and try to shake that indebted obligatory sense of having to be solid. he can’t tell fans - younger or older - that romanticise and idolise him or his journey how tough it really is, how dark the dark moments really were. he’s said it before — ‘no one wants to hear that’— so he wrote it down. explicitly stating this song is a concept - which may also be true - serves the need to reassure.

someone else’s fantasy is nothing like reality, I know that - the stories we tell ourselves about his life probably aren’t true and the minefield that is to navigate seems like a monumental headfuck; this can be boiled down to ‘don’t believe your own hype,’ but I do sometimes wonder how difficult it must be to have your life, your story, the sum of your moments written and immortalised by others with no regard for the truth, or the truth you want to tell, how fame is both permanent and fickle, how fans still quote interviews from 2013 that he can’t even remember - for a moment stay with me, and let me feel the freedom that you’re holding - this is vicarious living, this is grass is greener mentality, this is don’t let me go, don’t leave, let me see the world like you do