what do you sea?

dracula is an orientalist text conceived at the height of british empire, grounded in distortions of a region that stoker never visited. sadly (and unsurprisingly) i found very few romanian authors who have been translated into english online, so here’s a meagre list of recs:

1. luminița cioabă

romanian roma author, famous in romania as the daughter of bulibasha (the king of the roma nation), she forged her own path as a writer of short stories in the oral roma tradition which portray in vivid detail the history of the roma people of romania 

the birch grove

queen of the night and stone flower 

meralda

from her book, the lost country 

2. marin sorescu

from humble rural romanian roots, he wrote under the oppressive ceausescu government. in a national ironic tradition he very famously said: "Just as I can’t give up smoking because I don’t smoke, I can’t give up writing because I have no talent.“ some of my favorite poems:

the sea shell (1983)

carbon paper (1980)

creation (1992)

3. paul celan

jewish romanian poet from bucovina. i recommend this beautiful essay by ilya kaminsky, who like celan was forced to flee eastern europe due to antisemitism, deconstructing various translators’ attempts to adapt celan’s texts and experience of the holocaust. these are all poems from a 1971 poetry collection

all souls

leap-centuries 

language mesh and night

i felt like i had to redraw this meme

Pride & Prejudice / Good Omens - Cinematic Parallels

‘listen to your seminar tutors over the booklet, but only for seminars - in lectures i am king. unless you have me as a seminar tutor as well, in which case i am your king and god.’

‘has anybody played Rome: Total War? no?’

‘Cataline tried to burn the city and everyone he hated but he failed because, in short, nobody liked him.’

‘the mediterranean diet didn’t include tomatoes in the ancient world. i know. oh my god. i know.’

‘so of course when Hannibal turns up, the senate goes ‘sod it, lets kick his arse’.’

‘one man’s optimates is another man’s silver-spoon bearing prick.’

‘we don’t have much information about the 70s BC, largely because Plutarch doesn’t care.’

‘i’m not saying Rome: Total War is entirely accurate, but its battle campaigns are surprisingly historically informed.’

[hand drawing a map in chalk because the projector is broken] ‘i’ll give it a go, this is why i hate technology, and oh. well. that’s not italy.’

‘every army needs bakers and prostitutes, this is just a fact of life.’

‘Sulla. He’s a bit of a badass, but also a bit of a prick.’ 

‘Crassus gets given command of Syria and high fives everyone in the senate.’

‘Catullus was very pithy, very hellenistic in style. unlike the Iliad, which is 24 books of tedium.’

‘An Afternoon at Carrhae: the Romans being shot at repeatedly by Parthian cavalry because if there’s one thing the Romans aren’t good at, it’s having a cavalry.’

‘It’s good to have fast legs in war. Caesar moves very fast, not unlike Napoleon. The Usain Bolt of ancient warfare. I’m not sure why I said that, it’s an atrocious analogy.’

‘Athens is the Edinburgh of the ancient world; it has nothing to offer but education and pretty buildings.’

‘Shout out to those of you who spent your teenage years playing Rome: Total War.Which is what I did.’ 

‘The senate go into a panic and they decide to flee Rome at dawn, but some idiot forgets the treasury. I know. Ridiculous.’

‘Again: don’t use elephants during warfare. They’re not as cool as they look. And given they’re now endangered, it’d just be mean.’ 

‘I had to use this meme, I’m sorry. You’re all aware of the one does not simply walk into mordor meme right? I’m sorry, we’ll move on.’

‘I put this photo in for dramatic effect but I realise that it’s just a field. I don’t know why people bother going to see battle sites, they’re all really boring. I saw bones once, they were quite interesting. But most battle sites: boring.’

‘Caesar doesn’t tell Rome anything while he’s away in Egypt for a year, so they have no idea Pompey’s dead. All they know is that Antony is being a pain in the ass, which is, in all honesty, not unusual for Antony.’