Max Elia Julian

I STILL CAN’T BELIEVE WE WON EUROVISION ITALIAN BISEXUAL WON I WILL CRY FOREVER

I also can’t believe i will see them live in December 😭😭😭

I haven’t post in a while and i wanted to explain a bit the reason behind my sudden hiatus.

I haven’t been well mentally, my anxiety for the past year has been over the roof, and i had the biggest burnout of my life. Not only related to studying, but also drawing. It was something i did in my freetime, but it had quickly become a sort of job: i was making some money from my drawings, but it meant that i had to post regularly, follow trends etc. I started dislinking my art style, and i was drawing more because i had to post something rather than doing it because i enjoyed it. At some point stuffed piled up and i couldn’t draw anymore, looking at my art was almost painful, and logging in was a reminder that i wasn’t drawing and that i couldn’t create anything beautiful anymore. 

That together with a lot of things that happened in my personal life (which are not gonna talk about) basically brought me to the breaking point, whatever i did was anxiety inducing, my intrusive thought were running wild. I was in a really dark place ngl and even drawing or posting or logging in on social media would basically cause me a panic attack. I can’t even explain it rationally, and i know it sounds dumb or exagerated, it does to me as well. 

Flashforward to this day, i recived a diagnosis for OCD, i started going to therapy, and i’m slowly getting better and fixing my life one step at the time. 

Idk if i’ll ever return to post here or if i’ll deactivate it, at the moment i’ve decided to start from scratch on @apunkwhodidballet and on my private blog @decayingpunk

I feel a lot of less pressure knowing there isn’t a huge amount of people following me and they are mostly people i know irl. So in the meantime if you want to follow me again you’ll find me there (this to let you know that the blog isn’t stealing my art, i’m reposting some stuff lmao)

finally, about the luca marinelli folder: it doens’t exist anymore because someone decided to snitch and i had to take it down to advoid paying a lot of money and going to court. idk if the thing was real or someone messing with me but i got scared and deleated it. sorry about that.

Thanks for anyone who has read all of these and whoever decides to follow my journey elsewhere.