i guess this has become a motogp blog

He wasn’t fully sure why. Maybe it was simply because he wanted his papa to see him first, to be able to prepare himself better and react if he didn’t want to see him without being influenced by his son.

Or maybe it was to make sure he actually entered. To make sure he didn’t disappear behind David’s back, never to be seen again.  

He swallowed at the thought. To turn around and suddenly… The other would be gone.

He expected to feel relieved. Like a weight been taken away. It’d solve the problem to make a decision he didn’t want to make.

There’d be no more questions of if and how and whether or not he had changed. It’d just be answered. And everything could go back to normal.

But instead of relief, the boy felt nothing but emptiness. Like an empty pit opening up in his stomach, swallowing him whole at the thought of losing his father again.

He didn’t want to go through all that again. He didn’t want the other to leave again. He wanted him to stay.

He wanted to watch him enter the hospital room and try to fix things, just like he did now.

The moment still didn’t felt real.

He was watching his fathers be in the same room – without cameras, without being forced, without it being the only logical way – for what felt like the first time in his life.

“Rossi.” He heard his papa’s voice.

And for the first time, he heard him say it, the same way his uncle and grandparents always spoke of the Italian. He spit out his name like it was danger. Like it was poison.

So unlike he said the name whenever David was around.

And for the first time, he realized that it was because he didn’t want him to think, that it was because he carried the same name.

David Marquez Rossi.

With him the two names met.

And here – in this hospital – the two names met again. Because of him.

He swallowed, his body gently tilted to look around his taller father, to catch a glimpse of his papa. He wanted to burn the moment in his head, scared it might be the last time to see his father in the same room.

Marc was sitting upright in his hospital bed. He looked straight ahead, his head held high. He wasn’t showing any hesitation or weakness. There was a calculating expression, no emotion on his face.

“I expect you talked to – MY BABY!” he said loudly as his face broke out in a wide grin. His eyes had landed on David lingering behind Vale.

He reached his arm out while David ran passed the Italian, grinning as well. “Hola Papa!” he replied while climbing next to his papa who pulled him onto the mattress.

“Tio and I were playing football.” “Let me guess… You won?” he asked. “Of course I did!”

He chuckled. “Of course you did.” He agreed. “Maybe I should have put you in football instead of on a dirtbike.” “Noooooo!!” he yelled out.

“Fine.” He said, letting out a dramatic sigh. “Racing it is… Like your parents… Talking about the de-“

Devil. He almost said it. He had almost called the father of his child a devil, as he looked up at Rossi.

But he managed to bit his tongue.

Not for the Italian sake, but for David. He wasn’t supposed to think that the other was a monster too. He wasn’t supposed to grow up, thinking he shared blood with a monster.

Because if Rossi was the devil, then what did this make his child?

Marc had made it this far. He couldn’t destroy it yet.

Ironically, Marc thought of Vale less of a monster whenever he thought about David. No monster could have a child as kind and sweet as David. So maybe there was some goodness left in the Italian…

“-dad” Marc corrected himself quickly, not missing a beat.

He knew Valentino hadn’t noticed the mix up that had almost happened. He knew it based on the hope – the small smile - that crossed Valentino’s face as he said it.

It felt like a stab through the heart. It seemed like he clanged to it. Like it was beacon of hope he was trying to hold onto. Like a lie he told that the other so desperately wanted to believe in.

“You two had a talk?” Marc asked. “yeah.” Both replied at the same time.

“Was okay, I guess.” David muttered. He looked down on his hand, not really wanting to go into the details just yet. Until he looked up. He looked straight at the Italian, remembering his promise to do better.

He wanted that his papa knew it as well. And if the Italian didn’t start, he would. “Actually, he wants to tell you something!” he pointed out. “David, no.” Vale immediately said, trying to shush him, to not push this onto Marc once more.

“No. What do you want to tell me?” Marc asked. He looked at Vale almost daring. Like he expected a demand.

But Vale just smiled at him. It was a soft smile, one that was usually reserved for Luca and the academy boys. One that felt like love. “I just wanted to tell you that I will spend every day of my life making things up to you and David. I swear to you, I will devote the rest of my life to you.”

He knew it sounded sappy.

He knew it was probably not what Marc wanted to hear.

But he said it. It was out in the open for both Spaniard to hear.

“Will you?” Marc asked in the developed silence. He couldn’t help but chuckle. It sounded like a bad joke. It sounded like something only Valentino Rossi could say in a situation like this.

“Then why tell David not to mention it?”

“Because I thought I had already mentioned it in our earlier conversation. And now it’s time to prove it to you and David that I meant every word, not just tell you I would.” He replied and Marc had nothing he could say to that.  

“But I am sure you two have a lot to discuss and talk about. I’ll leave you two alone for now.” The Italian tried, feeling very out of place as he watched his son cuddled up to Marc, even though it was an adorable view.

“Yeah, you’re pretty good at that.” David muttered. “David!” Marc said, trying not to laugh. Pedro was really starting to get an influence on the boy…

“No, he is right. I’m not going to pretend it’s not true. But this time it wont take another 10 years for me to be back.” The oldest promised.

“We’ll see.” Marc teased.

Vale stared at him.

He wanted to be in disbelief. He wanted to be shocked. To be hurt.

But he couldn’t. The only thing he was in disbelief in, he was shocked about, was the fact, that he was still allowed around his son. That Marc hadn’t thrown him out or taken David and hid him somewhere never to be seen again.

So he just smiled.

“Yeah, you’ll see. Doesn’t matter how long it’ll take… Is vanilla still your favorite ice cream?” “No. It’s raspberry.” “Good to know. I’m gonna get ice cream.”

“Ice cream!” David yelled out loud.

Vale gave Marc a look. A question. Hopeful but a question. Like he was wondering if he was allowed to. Marc nodded quickly while his arms wrapped tightly around David.

He pulled him back against him, holding him as close as he physically could.  He felt like he was guarding him. After all he was still his dearest treasure.

“So… He talked to you?” Marc started softly.

“Yep. Told me he regretted what he did and so on.” “And what do you mean with… ‘and so on’?” he interrogated further.

David let out a deep sigh. “I mean that he gave me a whole speech about regret and that he messed up and that he wants to make amends.” He summed up.

“And what do you think about it?”

David shrugged.

Slowly, he was getting tired of all this. The emotions. The pain. The consideration. The attempt to think all this over rationally…

He didn’t want to overthink anymore. He didn’t want to talk about all this again and again. He just wanted to exist with his papa. He wanted things to go back to normal again.

But a part of him wanted his father to be part of this new reality as well.

“I… I don’t know. I want to forget everything that happened and just move on. I want to pretend all this never happened. But… He was nice. I mean, he was actually nice and I… I…”

His voice trailed off. He bit his lip and Marc knew that this could only mean that he was hesitant to say what was on his mind.

He gently nudged his side. He gave him an encouraging smile. “It’s okay. You can tell me.” He promised.

“He… He taught me how to make pasta and we watched One Piece together. It was fun. He… He asked me about school and helped me with my homework. He even put my drawings up.” He muttered.

He remembered what it was like. After Vale had accepted him. Before everything blew over again.

That time had been good. Really good. He had liked that time a lot. He had been able to pretend it was his reality for a while.

And he really wanted it to be his reality, no matter how much his brain told him it was just wishful thinking, that he shouldn’t trust the Italian again.

Afterall, he knew best that every time he had trusted him so far, he had ended up in tears.

“It… It felt normal. I just… I’m sorry, papa-“ he admitted. There were tears in his eyes.

Marc immediately hold him closer, pressing a kiss to the side of his head. “What? No, no, mi corazon, you didn’t do anything wrong. Why are you apologizing?”

“Because… It felt like he was my dad and then… I wanted him to be my dad. I know he was rude and he – he hurt you. I shouldn’t…” he sniffled loudly as the memories of their fallout returned.

“I don’t want to like him, papa.” He just wanted to go back how it used to be. He wanted to be curious about him – oh how stupid he now felt to ever want to get to know and get along with him – without having him in his life.

He wanted his peaceful life with his papa and uncles and Pedro back.

But suddenly there was this voice in the back of his head, whispering of a possibility he never thought might exist.

And it scared him. Because suddenly he knew what it was like he. He knew it was a possibility. He knew what it could be like. And he had wanted it so much for such a long time.

But suddenly he knew it and he knew what it could feel like to have it all blown over. He knew what it was like to be hated by Valentino Rossi first handed.

So now there were both.

He knew what it was like to be his son and to be an abandoned son.

And he had no idea how to go about this.

“But why is he nice just to be rude again? Why is he nice just to then yell at me? I don’t want him to yell at me… I want him to be my papa but… What if he yells at me again?” he asked, feeling lost.

Marc’s heart hurt for his son.

He didn’t know what to say or do. He wanted to comfort him, to promise him that everything would be okay. But he didn’t know how. He didn’t know whether sending Rossi back to Italy or keeping him around would do more harm.

He had no idea what to say to or do to keep his son from being hurt again.

“You know… When you were a baby, I was horrified that I would hold you wrong.” He said instead. He smiled gently, remembering the early days and how terrified he was.

“I was scared that you would get hurt because I accidentally got you these tiny shoes for your tiny feet that could have been too small… I was horrified that I might use too many blankets – or not enough – or that your ear plugs might fall off mid racing and you’d go deaf.”  

David looked up at his father, his expression showing his confusion.

“I was scared you’d roll over and suffocate while sleeping. I even kept your windows close at all time because I thought what if there was a wind, blowing off your little blanket and making you freeze but what if you needed fresh air? I-“

“Paaaapaaa… What’s your point?” The boy asked eventually.

“My point is that I have worried about you long before you were born. I was so scared that anything could happen to you, I made up all these… impossible scenarios… I thought about everything and anything and yet…”

Marc bit his lip as he looked at his sweet son. His sweet baby who was supposed to know no pain. Who was supposed to be growing up sheltered and protected.

And instead he was here, worrying about his father, not understanding how to deal with everything around.

“Yet I didn’t saw coming what was about to come. And you were dragged into all this mess. I just- I don’t want to see you get hurt. You shouldn’t have to worry about getting hurt like this. Not by your own father.” He stated.

He brushed over the brown curls, still wanting to protect him. He didn’t want to see him worry like this ever again.

“Papa…” he whispered. “I… I don’t think he… I think he learned his lesson, don’t you? He might actually be trying. I… I want him to try.”

He sounded hopeful. Like despite all the pain and fear, he had to go through, David still chose to believe in the good of people. Like he still wanted to give his father another chance.

Marc needed to know if this was just his imagination or if it was really on David’d mind.

“What would you do, David? Would you want to…?” he started.

“He… He was only mean when that cunt Salucci was there… Other than that, he was… He was nice. Actually pretty kind… And if… If there’s no Salucci anymore… Then he wont be mean again, right?” he tried to reason.

He was still guarded. Still hesitant.

He no longer trusted Rossi’s words blindly.

“Maybe.” He whispered. “We wont know.”

There was no way to know. Right now, it was a gamble whether or not Rossi would keep his word.

“But to know means… We try. Right? Are we trying, papa?” “I… I don’t know yet. We’ll see. We can always start slow.”

“I think it’d be nice.” David confessed, unsure if he was allowed to say it.

He was torn. David sounded hopeful. He sounded like he actually wanted this. And a part of him wanted to blindly agree. To move on. To make sure David had the parents he deserved…

But the fear of making a mistake, of accidentally misjudging the situation – misjudging Vale – was ever present.

He was on high alert.

Marc sighed. He knew that things wouldn’t be this easy.

“Oh, my sweet child…”  Marc mused. He was amazed by his son’s heart. He wondered where he got it from. It wasn’t a trait he had. Or Vale had. This was pure David. “He’d be an idiot not to try and make you happy.”

He pressed a kiss to his head.

“I swear to you, I wont let anything happen to you ever again. I swear, I’ll do anything to keep you happy, David.” He promised, meaning every word. He didn’t know how,  but he’d protect him. Somehow.

So he decided to give it a shot. But he wanted to keep David away from it all for as long as possible.

He knew it’d be impossible to keep them completely separate but maybe just for a while… Just to make sure David wouldn’t get too attached.

He decided to switch up the conversation, talk about something other than the Italian.

Roughly 10 minutes later said Italian returned, handing a raspberry ice to him and one to the boy.

David grinned as he takes the chocolate ice cream. For a moment, Marc wondered if this was simply a coincidence, a good guess, because David is a child and most children love chocolate ice cream.

Then he remembered that David had lived under the same roof as Vale. He remembered that they shared meals. Dinners. Dessert?

He wondered if Rossi had taken David to that ice café in Tavullia he loved. He wondered if he had taught him to make Italian gelato. He wondered what kind of memories they had actually made.

He swallowed hard, feeling like he had lost a bit of control. Control over his child.

David had memories he didn’t know. He had no way of knowing. He had no idea how close David and Vale actually had gotten.

He felt his heart clench, suddenly wondering what would happen if he made the wrong call. If David would resent him. If these small memories meant anything to him.

He felt a coldness run over his back and it wasn’t because of the ice cream.

He watched David and Vale interact. He watched them talk.

There was no way to keep them separate. Not really. Not without hurting David.

He swallowed, trying to imagine taking all this away from his son…

He couldn’t.

“Sit down.” He said, stopping Vale’s movement back to the door, to give them space. “David was just telling me about your dogs, comparing them to Shira and Stich. The dachshunds win, don’t they?”

“Yeah!” David said quickly. “I can hold them like plushies!”

They talked a bit about dogs. It felt easy. Like a normal conversation.

Vale was showing off the picture he took of David sleeping on his couch with his dogs around him when he used them as a pillow. His small head was buried in the soft furr, his hands clutching it.  

It looked adorable. Marc couldn’t help but cooe over the picture. “Send this to me!” he demanded. Vale grinned. “Will do.” He promised.

Marc decided to ignore the unsettling feeling of prove that his son had spend time at the older’s house. That he had fallen asleep on his couch. That he had probably been carried to bed by his father afterwards.

It sounded so normal. Domestic.

Like it was supposed to be.

Marc felt his heart clenching at the thought of Valentino carrying a sleeping David upstairs, putting him to bed, gently tugging him in… Had he given him a forehead kiss?

Marc felt both overprotective, not wanting the older near him and like this was how it should have been all those years. He decided not to investigate his own feelings further for now.

As they talked, there was no mention of what happened, no try to fix it. Just a regular conversation.

Some time later, Vale decided to head out and David was taken home by Alex.

And suddenly Marc was alone again.

He sighed loudly, laying back in bed. He stared at the ceiling, wondering what he was supposed to do.

A little bit later, his mother returned.

“Mama?” he asked, his voice quiet. “I need to your advice… Please.”

“What is going on, bebe?” she asked gently. She had a loving smile in her face as she sat down, taking her son’s hand.

Marc looked at her, a question visible in his face. All the thoughts that had haunted him returned at once. He took a deep breath.

“Am I making a mistake, mama?” he asked.

“I don’t know. Why do you fear you are making a mistake?”

“Because the last time, I let him in, I almost… It was hard. And… David and I have such a peaceful existence right now. We are happy, just us two. He has a good life with me, you, papa, Alex… his Italian uncles and Pedro. He has Jorge and Dani… Is… Is – Is he worth all that? Is Rossi worth risking all this?”

He knew he wasn’t really risking them. He knew they would still be there. There’d just be another name on the list of people that loved and took care of David.

And wasn’t that what a father would want for his son?

“Do you want me to answer this as your mother or objectively?” Roser asked, her voice sounding serious. “Both.”

“As your mother… Yes, you are making a mistake. That man hurt you and your son. Take David and run. Close the door, lock it and throw away the key.”

The words hurt.

Marc felt them hurting him. Because he knew she was right. She knew it was the wise thing to do. And he felt these words hurting him, because he didn’t want them to be true. He didn’t want them to be the wise choice.

“And…Objectively?” he continued.

“Objectively… He is trying. He is trying to make amends, to be a father… I don’t know if this is the best he can offer but if it the minimum he can give… It is considerable.”

“But is it enough? And how long will it last? Is it enough to make David happy? To keep him save?” he rambled. He wanted to say more. To rant.

But his mother took his hand, silencing him before his thoughts could flood them both.

“Oh mi hijo… Only time will tell.”

“But I don’t want to have him get hurt again. Not when I can keep him save.”

“My sweet little boy… Right now, you are David’s whole world. But you wont stay that. It is the nature of growing up. He will grow up, move out… And if there is a god, he will race as dangerous as you do and give you an even bigger heart attack than you gave me whenever your father called me when you and your brother were racing.” She said laughing.

She was still holding his hand, knowing that this was far deeper than Marc let her to believe. And maybe he let himself to belief.

“David will grow up either way. With Rossi or without. If Rossi keeps his word – amazing. Then your son will have two parent. And if he won’t, he’ll still have you. He will survive that too, no matter how impossible it seems.” She grinned at her son.

“Just like you survived him. Remember when he left? You cried so much and yet you survived. You built an amazing life for yourself and for your son. So at the end of the day, no matter what will happen, I know David will be just fine.”  

Marc couldn’t help but nod. He didn’t know what else to say or do.

“And I promise you, if you ask me, I will tell you to send this man into the furthest prison in hell you can find and throw away the fucking key. But this isn’t entirely about David, is it? Not really.”

“Of course it is! I want to do what’s best for David. He-“

“The best for every child is to have happy parents. So tell me, Marc… Do you think he can still make you happy? Do you think in 6 – 7 months or years… Do you think at any time you would regret not giving him this chance? That you will miss him?”

Marc felt like his body was getting drenched off blood.

He felt like every single nerve in his body had been knocked out.

He stared at his mother wordlessly.

He knew she was right. Mostly.

And it was exactly what scared him.

“Yeah.” He whispered. “i… It’s – I’m not stupid – or naïve. I don’t trust him. I don’t want to immediately trust him and I’m not going to jump immediately in bed with him…” He stated.

Slowly he looked up. He allowed himself to be hopeful, just for a moment.  

“But… But what if he changed? What if… mama, what if he is back? The… The man I loved… What if he is finally back and I just… I cant send him away if he tries to come back, can I?” he asked, his voice holding onto the slightest hope.

He wanted it to be true. He wanted him to have changed.

For both, David and his own sake.

“I… I don’t think you can.” Roser confessed, a gentle chuckle leaving her mouth. “God knows I prayed that you could but after all…”

She had wished for him to find someone else with all her heart. And she had hoped that a certain other, older Italian might be it... But it wasn’t.

“Marc… Why did you break up with Andrea?”

Marc stared at her confused. He didn’t understood why she’d bring up his ex now.  

“Dovi…? I… I thought…” “He was a good man. Maybe even perfect. He certainly was very good to you and to David… But you didn’t chose him. Why? Say it. Even if it’s just for yourself. I think it might help you now.”

Marc bit his lip.

He remembered that night.

The pregnancy test, in his shaky hands.

He remembered standing in the bathroom, taking the test. He remembered praying that it was negative. Not because he didn’t want another child – he wanted. He wanted nothing more than to have David grow up with a sibling.

David. He was his first thought. It was already late. His son was asleep long ago – at least he thought.

He gently entered his little sons room.

He gave him a kiss on the head. “Whatever happens, I love you. I always do. You might get a sibling though.” He had confessed.

Then he ran over to the Lorenzo Pedrosa house hold. He knocked on the door, shifting on the porch.

“Marc?” Jorge asked confused as he opened the door. “What’s up? Is David-“ “He’s fine. Sleeping peacefully. It’s just… Can I talk to Dani? I… I really need him right now.” He confessed.

“Always.” Without hesitation he let him through.

Team tiny ended up on the couch, sitting closely together as Marc told Dani about the test, the possibility that he might be pregnant and the fact that he didn’t want to be.

He needed Dani to put his head back in place. He needed Dani to help him figure out what to do and how to get his emotions in order.

“Okay… Marc, what is different? I mean, now you’re a champion, You’ve proven yourself. You got your life under control. But now you… What is so different that you decide in an objectively better situation, the same possibility is worst.” Dani asked gently.

“It’s- Andrea…” he whispered.

It was the only difference. The only difference that actually mattered between 2013 and then.  

“Dovi? What about Dovi…?”

He had looked at Dani then and now looked at his mother. He had the same answer. The only truth.

“He’s not Valentino.” He whispered.

“Yes… He is not Valentino Rossi.” Roser responded. “He won’t ever be. No one else ever will… So what do you do, Marc?”

Marc wanted to hid under his blanket. He wanted to hide away from everything and just pretend this all wasn’t happening.

But he couldn’t.

He had to make a decision. He had to find out if he wanted to put his own heart back out there and what it’d means for David.

“I… I can handle having my heart broken by him again. But David… How I can risk my son’s heart?” he asked.

“Marc… Protecting him from this has long be impossible. David already knows Vale. He knows him and he loves having this version of him as a father… The only thing you can decide is whether it is worth the risk. For yourself and for him. Do you take it and risk having David be hurt even more or do you hurt him now and make him move on from what could have been. Because that is what David will mourn.” She stated clearly.

“David doesn’t deserve to be hurt by his own father. But right now there is no version where you get your boy out unharmed. You can only limit it.” “But how?” “That is up to you.”

Marc let out an annoyed noise. “You could just tell me, you know.” “The joys of parenthood, mi hijo… You have a kid, you have to figure things out for them on your own. Your kid. Your problem.”

He knew she was right. And he knew that she was holding back not to point out that he did not exactly chose a father that didn’t create problems.

The conversation stayed with Marc as the next days passed in a blur.

Marc was increasingly getting better. David was visible relieved about that. While he still constantly radiated around his papa, he no longer clinged to him.

Vale was still around, visible trying not to overstep while not stepping away.

At one point Dani even came to visit, having tears in his eyes the whole time.

“Dani, I’m fine!” Marc laughed them off. “I know. But I just had a baby and found out you almost died in the meantime and I – I – My hormones are killing me so shut up, you idiot!”

“Then show me the baby pics!” he demanded, pulling his former teammate on the bed next to him while Pedro and David were outside playing.

He actually had hoped he’d bring Amelia with him, but Dani had refused, not wanting to expose his new born to hospital germs yet.

Dani grinned and pulled his phone out to show off his little daughter. “Awe, she is adorable.”

“She is… God, I love her so much. And Pedro is actually being a good brother. David too. The two ‘stole’ her yesterday… Almost gave me a heart attack when she wasn’t in her crib and then I find all 3 in Pedro’s room.” He told him.

“What do 2 teenage boys even do with a newborn?” “Apparently put her on a cushion, move it like a bike and show her an old reply so she watched her first motogo race…”

Marc snorted in laughter. It sounded like something their sons would be up to.

It felt good to know that David was still himself, still playing around with Pedro, letting himself be dragged down any mischievous idea.

“Am I crazy for missing her already?” Dani asked. “Nah. She is your baby. You want to know she’s save.” “I know she is. She is with her dad… Talking about baby daddies… Wanna talk about Vale?”

“Not you too.” Marc groaned. “I have talked and thought about this man enough for now. Tell me about your baby!” he demanded. Dani chuckled.

“Fine. Just… It’s good to have you back… I didn’t even know about all this happening but I am so glad you’re okay…” “You didn’t know?”

“I was heavily pregnant and a hormonal nightmare… You think Salucci or Rossi would have been anywhere near David once I were done with them? I would have kidnap him.” He stated, well aware that he was not kidding.

“Good. So Jorge really didn’t tell? Did – Did you not watch the news about the crash?” “Nope. I haven’t watched the news in 3 months. Was too depressing.” “Understandable…” he nodded.

“So what will you do to Jorge for not telling you?” he asked, having a smug smile. He knew them well enough to know that Dani didn’t tolerate being lied to. He was sure the smaller man who was like an older brother to him had come with some good pay back plan.

Dani groaned but smiled. “Right now I am still acting like I am thinking about something, got him pretty on edge already. But I have a newborn to take care of and a teen to cuddle, I have no nerves to torture my husband right now so I think I’ll keep it up a few more days and then call it even.”

“Mean.” He laughed sarcastically. He had expected more from him.

“What? I love Jorge and I know why he did it… Also he is a good husband and father so I really couldn’t ask for more.”

Marc felt his heart clench. He was happy that his friend was in a good relationship. But a part of him wondered if this is what he could have with Vale too.

If Vale had changed. If this was the future he was heading towards if he’d forgive him.

Instead he quickly asked Dani “How is Pedro dealing with the new baby? I remember you were worried about him feeling left out.”

The older Spaniard chuckled. “He recently snapped at me that I don’t need to hoover over him the whole time just because – and I quote – ‘Dad successfully came in you’…. I almost slapped him.”

Marc snorted and cracked up in a loud laughter. It made him laugh so hard, he felt his surgy scars hurt. Not that he cared right now.

“So apparently I was a bit too overbearing while making sure he knows he is still loved.” “I don’t think he could ever doubt.” He reassured him.

“He will always be my first baby.” He mused.

The moment felt soft, both remembering their children as small, helpless, innocent babies.

As if they had sensed it, said babies – now grown kids – burst into the room. Pedro was still giggling while holding onto the ball he had brough along.

“Oh no. What did you do now?” Dani asked immediately, knowing that this behaviour from his son was not a good sign. “Nothing!” he replied too quickly, sharing a glance with David.

Dani was about to answer when Vale entered. His hair was ruffled. He looked exhausted and a bump was starting to form on his forehead.

The two former Honda rider stared at Vale. The Italian awkwardly stood in the door way.

“What the fuck happened to you?” Dani asked perplexed. “Nothing.” He replied calmly while Pedro and David let out a suspicious giggle.

“We’re taking this as our cue to get going.” Dani decided. “But papa-“ Pedro started, his voice slightly whiny as Dani dragged him along. “No complains, Pequeno. We’re going home.” “I am taller than you-“ “You think I care?  You are my baby.” He shot back.

When they were back out, Dani eyed his son. “That was you, wasn’t it?” he asked Pedro. “Of course.”

He nodded. He knew out of a parenting view, he should probably tell his son off. But he decided he could let this one slide, all things considered.

“Nice one.” He said. Pedro chuckled, giving him a fist bump.

Back in the room, David had taken his usual spot on his papa’s side. He was muttering about his day at school, what he and Pedro had played, some drama Pedro had going on with Fermin…

Eventually he fell asleep to his parents voices.

He was laying on the hospital bed, his head resting on Marc’s side. He had a small smile on his face.

Vale looked at the boy, his eyes filled with love and adoration.

“I guess I can be happy I was let back in?” he asked, leaving it open whether he meant their lives or simply the room.

“Did 10 years pass again already?” Marc shot back, not really serious, not really joking either.

“I deserve that.”

No. He didn’t deserve that. A stupid comment wasn’t even close to what he deserved.

“You deserve to never see your son again. You deserve to see him be happy, kind and successful. You deserve to watch him be the great human is and not get a word to talk to him. You deserve to see him be great with a screen between you. You deserve to never see or hear his voice again.“

He had to say it. He had to make sure Vale knew it one last time. He had to know that him being here was not a given. It was a privilege.

“I know.” Vale said. “And I do. I accept that this is what I deserve, Marc… So why am I here? Why do I get to talk to David? Why do I get the chance to make things right? Why not throw me out?”

It was an honest question.

He was grateful every time he had seen and talked to David and Marc.

But he didn’t understand why.

He had been sure that marc would have send him to hell. That he wouldn’t want to see him again. And he couldn’t blame him. He would have send himself away if he had been in Marc’s position.

Instead he was there, talking to David.

And he had no idea why. He couldn’t understand it. And he feared that the small threat he was hanging onto could snap any second.

The thought scared him more than anything.

“Because David doesn’t deserve that.” Marc stated. “He doesn’t deserve a father like you, a father that… He didn’t deserve that version of you and he doesn’t deserve having no father either.”

“He has you. He has a father. And I am sure that Dovizioso was a great step-father, wasn’t he?” Vale pointed out.

Marc froze. Confused, he stared at him. “You know about that?”

“A little birdie told me.” He shrugged, his eyes darting to David.

Marc chuckled. “I don’t know if he needs to learn to be quiet or if this is the first step of him being a mastermind.”

He looked at him as well.

David. His son. Their son.

“He deserves the father I thought you’d be, the father you could have been.” He mumbled.

“And I want to be that.” The Italian quickly added.  

“Vale, you know, if you say that, you have to mean it. There is no way out. Either you leave now and I deal with the fall out now. It’d be kinder. If you don’t mean it, keep it short. Don’t give my son an illusion you cant keep up.” He said clearly.

He was laying out the possibilities, the conditions and what it’d mean.

“So if you stay, you can never leave again. You can’t abandon him ever again – I don’t care about me, but David… He doesn’t deserve that. If you decided to be his father you will die his father. And if you try to get out, I swear, I will actually kill you.”

He wasn’t joking.

“And I don’t mean this as a saying. I don’t just say this. I mean, I will write my rights to David over to Alex or Dani, then I will get a gun and I will shot you. I am not playing about this. Leave him now and I don’t care. Leave him later and I will take your life.”

Vale looked at him with a serious expression. “You should. If I ever make David feel like he is not wanted, kill me.”

The two men stared at each other. Neither of them breaking eye contact.

“You really mean it? You really want to make amends?” “I do. I mean it. Every word. I want to be his father. And even if he never sees me as his father, I want to try. I need to try. I – The thought to go home to Italy right now, to leave him and you alone, kills me. So please… Please, I am begging you on my knees, to give me the chance to love him… And you.”

Marc wanted to agree. He hadn’t want to hear anything else since that day in Sepang all those years ago.

But he wouldn’t jump on it. He wouldn’t fall so quickly. He had to make sure that it was save. And that would take time. It’d take more than relentless reassurance. It’d take prove. Effort. Continues, constant showing up.

“You can try being the father David deserves.” He stated.

And he watched Vale’s face light up.

He watched his expression shift into pure excitement, mixed with love.

“Thank you!” he breathed out. “Thank you, Marc. I swear, I will-“ “Stop saying it. Prove it.” He interrupted him, already questioning if it was the right decision.

“I will.” His eyes darted back to David.

He was still laying cuddled up against Marc.

He looked peaceful. Gentle. He had no idea what had just happened around him.

Vale looked at him with all the love in his heart, the same way he had looked at him when David was just a baby.

He was his motivation to be a better person. To make amends.

Carefully, he reached out.

“He is a great kid” Vale whispered, caressing the hair of the young boy gently. His expression was one filled with love and gentle care.

Marc looked at him, his eyes solely focused on his. He looked at his eyes. At his expression. The gentle smile adoring his face. He looked at him watching his son.

And all he could think about was how it had been years ago. How gentle the oldest had been when their son was just born. How gentle he had been when Marc was still pregnant. He remembered his love. His gentle care.

He remembered the man, he used to love before his mind had been poisoned with lies.

He looked the same now.

Marc didn’t know if he was the same.

He certainly wasn’t the same naïve young man.

But at the end of the day, this was what aging and growing up was all about. This was what maturing meant. To change.

“Yeah.” Marc agreed. He couldn’t help but smile.

“Our son is a pretty great kid.”

Vale grinned when he heard that. He looked up, his eyes meeting Marc’s an underlying question visible in his eyes.