they should make an office... for ants...
ANYWAY! Hi! I'm Atomic Xifeng!
The Ringford Adventures had a great season! No doubt it was because of my insights and accountability.
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The Corruption, you say? My inherent nature, you say? Ah. I see.
Then... I suppose it is time for me to move on. If I am to leave, then I no longer need this.
[Cardiovascular Castle Courtyard]
Midnight Arends: We have to be getting close to the root of this whole "spy" business, right?
Marion Etienne: I mean, he could have been talking about me. I make a pretty good spy.
Midnight: OBVIOUSLY not! And by that I mean he's not talking about you.
Milani Blackstone: Maybe we're missing something obvious... because I hate that guy's guts!
Blubber Sparks: I need more information. Who HAVEN'T I done a palm reading on yet? Claude... Asher... Hazel...
Marion: Me.
Blubber: I dunno, you seem pretty in-the-clear, y'know?
Marion: For the sake of fairness, I say you give everyone a shot. [He offers his hand to Blubber.]
Midnight: Seems legit.
Milani: Makes sense to me!
Blubber: Yeah, alright! [She leans over and takes Marion's hand.] ... You seem really Apollonian to me.
Marion: I get that a lot.
[Viper Zoologist slithers in, looking about in a panic. They've removed their suit and they look duller than normal]
Viper Zoologist: Oh, no, no, no... Where's the exit...
Midnight: Ah! Viper!
Viper Zoologist: G-! Hello...! Small cat!
Midnight: [Its eyes narrow.] Midnight.
Viper Zoologist: [They look to the sky, fiddling with their tie.] Uh, no, it seems to be about mid-day--
Milani: What's gotten into you? You seem a bit out of it.
Viper Zoologist: I... I got to get out of here.
Midnight: Is it cuz you got no clothes on.
Viper Zoologist?: I don't belong here! I NEVER belonged here! I never even WANTED to run a baseball team! I'VE BEEN LOST IN MY OWN HEAD FOR YEARS!!! [They shout, hyperventilating right after.]
[Midnight, Marion, and Milani all have their attention on the snake, a bit concerned. Blubber is still hard at work.]
Viper Zoologist?: [They barely recompose themselves.] Can one of you point me toward ANY exit?
Milani: Main lobby is on your second left after you go through the butterfly garden.
Viper Zoologist: Thanks, Mrs. Claus. [And in an instant, they are gone, making a mad dash into the distance...]
Midnight: What was any of that for...?
Blubber: Their aura seems to have been cleansed since last we spoke. Good for them! [She lets go of Marion's palm, satisfied with her analysis.]
[A brief lull.]
Marion: We're never seeing them again, are we.
Midnight: Well, never say never!
[But even after, the atmosphere is heavy and empty.]
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But it seems to be on there now... as part of a series known as "the game played by the Gods", something like that.
A card game. Being played by gods? Everyone knows baseball is the game of the gods. Just look at how involved it is. The gods know nothing of what the TRUE game of gods is.
Anyway, the artist I contected got back to me, now it's a "workshop item", right here. But you best learn about this "game of gods" before you try playing with this card set. I am also told this is one of many community sets, so if you like the base game, seek out expansions.
Personally, I'm going back to Windows Solitaire. The game for heretics like me.
How's the vacation going? Good? Great. We've been getting into the weeds here about making trading cards for the Ringford Adventures.
I contracted a local artist for experience, and everything was going well for the past few weeks... The artist captured their finest details and personalities expertly...
But then the bill came in. And apparently, we didn't even hire a trading card game artist... we got someone who was working with a card battle game. Strange.
Well, I can't do much about it now, but all I can really do is laugh it off.
Apparently, something went wrong when converting our team over to the new baseball system. Or so the team says. They had to go into a League-certified computer and be retooled, all that fun stuff.
A malevolent claw fiddled with the process. Took out a few screws and scratched some pins. The pitchers, who were the first to go through the system, got their boons razed in a white fire that spewed forth from the code. Lindsey Bodden, along with Defensive Hitter Marc Clout, were far enough to away to take aim, with Lindsey catapulting Marc directly into the light, his sword pointed dead ahead.
He plunged his sword through the flames, coming out the other side as a ghost, his blade firmly in the chest of some digital monster.
It was covered in thorns and petals, teeth dripping with blood basking in the full glow of consumption. It didn't seem to care much about being stabbed. It ceased its fire and gazed down upon the remaining players, eyes covered in glitched pixels and fuzzy logic. Beneath its corrupted exterior, the whiskers of The Beast remained.
"You have been standing in my way of becoming a galactic baseball champion for long enough. It's only fair to set you back."
The Lesser Boon data was scrambled and leaked into other parts of the code, distorting the space around it.
"You should have given up a long time ago. Someone among you should have made sure of that," he growled, pointing into the sea of players. "Disappointing, really. I expected better out of my henchman. Sowing chaos from within and all."
Everyone, except Marc Clout, who was still dangling by his sword stuck in The Beast, had been caught in the crossfire of this outlandish accusation.
"But, if you want something done right, you do it by youself. And that is why I will terminate this process, trapping you within this system for all eternity! You'll be forced to be desktop super stars until the machine falters, piece by piece, byte by byte, photon by-"
He monologued for a bit too long, and the upload process finished, exporting the players back to the real world... and leaving the computer a buggy mess. The Beast was trapped inside, and the League Officials wheeled away the machine, not really sure how it got infected in the first place. Vines sprung from between the keys and spiraled out of the ports. The League Officials talked about quarantining the computer and getting a new antivirus for this computer teeming with Corruption.
With the Players returned to the real world, Boons revoked or scrambled, they had to assess the possibility The Beast presented.
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We'll tell that artist I hired to... keep using their old forms, yes. They've already done much work based on them, and I bet I have some newspaper clippings of them lying around.
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