#xavier steele

A note of current affairs from the team:

I have seen the cycle, time and time again. I'm way older than the rest of these punks! Not Urrlok-old, but I'm OLD! I'm not letting this weather continue to destroy us, and this snake WILL NOT just get to sit back and let us get infected. They've got some real nerve, pushing this Corruption narrative...

We have to call upon those killed by this brutal cycle if we could ever hope to end it. The souls full of fury and despair.

-Lindsey Bodden

Another note, stuck right beside this one...

I concur! Supernatural forces are quite good at overpowering nature. I should know. I've recreated the philosopher's stone. With my own latex-covered hands.

-Doc Martinez

A nearly indecipherable scrawl accompanies this, writted in sharp, angular strokes of mud.

Translated by Doc Martinez...

AS FIRST EFFLORESCED, WE HAVE TO TAKE THINGS UP ON THE LEVELS OF THE COMMISSIONERS. CALL PAM. IMMEDIATELY. PAM WILL BE MORE PREPARED. HOPE STILL EXISTS.

-Xavier Steele

An addendum, written in sap and thorns, in a thuggish, Morris Fletcher sort of way...

robot girl. robos, need your opinion.

A spill of pink oil across the post.

LOTS of things have happened to me against my will here! I never signed up for half of this! I signed up to bring justice!!!

-MIDNIGHT

i think i hauve trojen

Hazel Wheeler was made into a Giant, but for a duck, that meant just becoming a human-sized duck. Who would you rather take on in a fight: One human-sized duck or ten duck-sized humans? Not many would take the duck. Especially if it's Hazel. Hazel is real bad at hitting the ball, but when she gets it, she gets it. People really have to gawk at her while she's at the pond; she's more popular than the native wildlife.

Xavier Steele embraced their inner and outer badger and basically turned the pitching mound into a sandbox for a good week. Apparently, the Tenacious Badger boon does not really turn you into a badger, but it makes you "dig in". Considering I see them eating crickets and mealworms by the plateful... perhaps it's more of a constitution buff.

Morris Fletcher, a coyote, has become a dragon. Or something close to a dragon. Someone has to keep the fire department on speed dial every time he's up to bat. He doesn't look as old and frail because of this upgrade, but he still puts on an act. Probably to steal an audience member's wallet when they ask for an autograph.

Polycarp Friedman was touched by the fae, giving the cauldron dainty little wings, sparkly decor, and star patterns on its ladle. They were all so excited that they were screaming with joy at the transformation. So I think. It's made of cast iron and iridium, not like those are poisonous to anyone.

Kristen Kirk, the real underperformer of the Ringford Adventures, has tried to step up her game by riding a Great Falcon into the stadium. This makes her a UFO by ballpark definitions. The falcon is snowy white and named Cupcake, for the record. Kristen knows she still has a ways to go to being at her peak performance. This is why she's practicing by playing catch with her giant birds.

After all this time experimenting, Doc Martinez stepped into the dark side and summoned a demon in the Clubhouse. They were really trying to engineer a lemon tree for the greenhouse, so we wouldn't have to keep paying so much for lemonade. Still, Martinez and the demon really hit it off, so they engage in alchemy together, and the demon gets free seeds every 24 Earth days.

Genevieve Valdes worked with Claude Wilkerson to make a vehicle she could ride in, which is reminiscent of a toaster oven. This too is a UFO, since who in their right mind would fly a toaster? Genevieve would, howver, just so she wouldn't have to wear a weird portal device strapped to her arm the whole time she was playing. Her little clay figures do most of the pitching, but she's still the commander.

Lindsey Bodden has been the champion of the outdoor ping pong table for five weeks in a row. She would have held a longer streak, had one of Katherine Fabre's ravens decided not to steal the ball. The ravens have yet again been banned from another part of the Cardiovascular Castle.

When playing at our home ballpark, we use resillient isopod-like monsters instead of regular balls. They resist fire, ice, electricity, water, ultraviolet rays, ionizing radiation, and being boiled in a pot of broth. This is how Polycarp Friedman makes their signature stew-smoothie, or stewthie, for each game's afterparty. The isopods are boiled to add flavor, then launched and whacked with a bat.

It's okay, they like it.

Selena Singleton has been recently deepsea caving in the castle's resevoirs. You can hear her bang around in the pipes at 3 in the morning. Every morning. Somehow, she keeps finding new selfie locations.

Morris Fletcher is selling cheap trinkets supposedly made of gold, and Katherine keeps falling for it, hook, line, and sinker. I know he just climbs trees and steals plastic trinkets from the squirrels however.

While on the away team, Doc Martinez has deviously been packing baseballs with a mixture of soil and seeds of endemic plants. Now, their outfields will be dotted with small patches of colorful wildflowers.

Claude Wilkerson has been using Martinez's rusty old inventions to water his greenhouse. They may have been jerry-rigged together, but they still work like new. Martinez's ingenuity continues to amaze Wilkerson.

Xavier Steele is a badger-and-bat hydra. They don't mind what pronouns are used for them, but they'd at least like you to know that Xavier... is an abbreviation.

A hog badger named Xerses, a Bermese ferret-badger named Abdul, an American badger named Vipul, a badger bat named Ida, a honey badger named Emine, and a European badger named Rosaire were combined in a laboratory blender, resulting in this creature. Xavier has 3 heads that face the front, and three that face the back. Like a carousel, these heads can spin and switch to be at the front when necessary.

The goal of Xavier was to hunt down a similar creature, an escaped specimen of a weasel hydra. However, they don't see the point in following the laboratory's wishes. They may all be badgers (or have "badger" in their names), but they have different ways they want to experience life. They want to eat cereal and omelette, look at rocks, play old polka records and enjoy life by the ocean. So, one night, they slipped away and made their home by a seaside village with gorgeous stone formations in the water. The lab was pretty outraged that this plan didn't work, but they should have seen this coming after the first hydra escaped.

Now they play baseball, since they've always wanted to travel the world... but they never had money for buses and planes.