Revised APWH

I thought I’d lost this forever. I will forever reblog.

imagine if Remus had won the duel against Romulus. the Reman Empire . that does not sound right at all

LONG LIVE REME

REME IS THE MAJORITY WE HAVE SUPERIORITY

AT LEAST WE HAVEN’T FALLEN REME IS STILL HERE BALLIN’

YOU ROMANS HATE RHYMING, SO MAYBE WE CAN DANCE ALL OVER YOUR PEOPLE WHO REFUSE TO WEAR PANTS ROME WILL FALL A SECOND TIME, BETTER TAKE COVER WE’LL MAKE REMUS RULE OVER HIS SWAG-LACKING BROTHER

WE COME FROM ROMULUS OUR DOMINANCE IS OBVIOUS YOU HAVE TOO MUCH CONFIDENCE YOU MUST BE DRINKING SO GO TO ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS

OH, RIGHT, ROMULUS…BY THE WAY, YOUR KING IS DEAD YOUR ROMAN TRASH SWORE NEVER TO HAVE A KING AGAIN THEN THOUGHT ‘WE SHOULD HAVE WACK EMPERORS INSTEAD’ WHO LIKED LYRES AND FIRES AND HORSES IN THEIR HEAD

REMUS IS USELESS HE’S JUST AN ANNOYING DOOFUS LACKING IN PRUDENCE AND HELLA FOOLISH

REME SIDES WITH THE PEOPLE OF THE AVENTINE HILL THE TIBER RIVER PROVIDES US WITH OUR FLOWS SO ILL ARROGANT STUCK UP ROMANS THINK THAT THEY HAVE IT ALL ROMULUS IS ANCIENT TRUMP ‘CAUSE HE WANTS TO BUILD A WALL

ACTUALLY IT WAS TECHNICALLY A FURROW SO AFTER THIS BATTLE YOU’RE GONNA WANNA BURROW INSIDE A HILL SO DAMN FAR NO ONE CAN SEE THAT YOU’RE BIZZARE

YOUR RHYMES ARE LIKE YOUR SWORDS DISAPPOINTING AND SHORT SWORDS AND STANDARDS UP, REMANS, IT’S WAR WE DECLARE ARMIES SO STRONG WE’LL KNOCK THE LAURELS OFF YOUR HAIR SEND OUT YOUR BIRDS, LOOK UP AT YOUR STARS, PRAY TO MINERVA AND CALL UP TO MARS YOU’LL NEED LUCK, ROME, TO WIN THIS WAR

OH, REME, YOU THINK YOU’RE THE BEST BUT WHEN YOU GO TOE-TO-TOE WITH ROME, WE’LL GIVE YOU NO REST OUR LEADERS WERE MEN LIKE NUMA REME IS STUCK WITH A LAME-O, LANA REME’S ARMY IS ONLY HUNDREDS STRONG ROME WILL DEFEAT YOU ALL YEAR LONG

WE RISE HIGHER THAN VESUVIUS’ FIRE THE KINGDOM OF REME WILL END THE ROMAN EMPIRE DID YOU MEAN MILLIONS? WE’VE GOT A GREAT AMOUNT, EACH REMAN HAS THE STRENGTH OF MORE THAN YOU CAN COUNT MAGNA DEA REX LANA WILL ASCEND TO THE SKY SOMETHING STRIKE ME DOWN BECAUSE MY HUBRIS IS HIGH YOU SHOULDN’T MESS WITH THE SECOND KING OF REME WHO RAISED A FACTION TO A NATION WITH JUST ONE MEME

There once were two people on Tumblr With knowledge in Classics did rumble They laid some sick beats To see one defeat Over whether Remus or Romulus would conquer

GIVE ME STATS WITH THIS PROFESSOR

I want this teacher