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Wrong number, right answer

Prompt: “first of all you ignored my cats dressed as Santa, so fuck you”

Pairing: itasaku

“Ah Naruto, give me Sasuke’s new number while you’re here”

“Huh?” Naruto winced at the feeling of thread pulling through skin, his brain working around the pain to catchup with Sakura’s words. “Sure, sure,” he fumbled for his phone with his left hand, awkwardly tapping through to his contacts.

“Uchiha, Uchiha,” he muttered to himself as he scrolled through the disgustingly long list of alphabetised contacts, till he came upon the “U” segment.

“Here!-Ah!” Naruto cried in triumph and subsequent pain as Sakura pierced the needle through the final, sensitive portion of skin on Naruto’s upper right arm.

“Sorry,” she muttered, her face an inch away as she worked meticulously.

“Its fine,” he reassured, holding back a moan of pain as he turned his attention back to his phone, feeling slightly dizzy.

He copied and pasted the number into a message and sent it, Sakura’s phone responding with a ping on her nearby desk. With a heavy sigh he put his phone down and his head back, and thought nothing further of it.

oOo

Sakura: Hey babe! Hows it going! ANBU kicking your ass yet? Had to get your number from naru since your lazy ass didn’t send it

Sakura: BTW guess who’s suspended again due to reckless overworking!? And probably won’t tell you

Sakura: Also, also I know your probs busy but look at this!

Sakura: [insert photo of cats in Christmas-themed clothing]

Sakura: It’s November 1st so I didn’t break the pact!

Sakura: Ok you’ve read all my messages and not responded, you ok b?

Reply: You have the wrong number. And judging by the above messages this must be Sakura.

Sakura: ...

Sakura: First of all, you just ignored my cats dressed as Santa, so fuck you.

Sakura: Secondly, why didn’t you say sooner, if you knew this was a mistake?

Reply: ...

Reply: Because I wanted to know who got suspended again.

Sakura: Why? Looking for some company during your own suspension?

Reply: ...

Reply: You just messaged Naruto to ask who’s number he gave, didn’t you?

Sakura: Maybe I did. Maybe I didn’t. Maybe I know things Itachi. Maybe I’m in your head.

Itachi: Yeah. Like you know who you’re sending pictures of rats dressed as mythical creatures to.

Sakura: Fuck you.

Itachi: That a proposition Haruno?

Sakura: ...

Sakura: Fuck you doubly, nay triply, Uchiha bastard

Itachi: I was concieved in wedlock and thusly refute your claim. But also, I’ll take that as a yes.

Itachi: I’ll pick you up from the hospital at 7

Sakura: Wait, what?? Are you being serious??

Itachi: Unless you’d rather I go on a date with the other person under suspension, then yes I am

Sakura: It’s Naruto and I don’t think your wallet’s deep enough for that amount of food, he’s an expensive date. Also I only have work clothes with me

Itachi: As long as it’s not a Santa costume, you could wear whatever you want and I wouldn’t care

Sakura: Great! My flamenco dress is still in my locker from halloween.

Itachi: Maybe I’ll ask Naruto after all. I hear he has a thing for Uchihas

Sakura: Don’t cockblock your brother like that. Afterall, he’s inadvertently the reason you have a date tonight

Sakura: Which reminds me, please for the love of God can someone give me that boy’s number!

#itasaku #itachisakura #itachi x sakura #naruto #writingprompt #fanfic #crackfic #fanfiction #narutofanfic #reirawrites

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babygirlthor

if you had to sum up all your fics with (1) ao3 tag what would it be?

I honestly think this is the sweetest panel so far

Chap 70 - Seitokaichou ni chuukoku

(Blasted through 2 pages in 40 mins, maybe will be done with the whole chapter in a few days…)

#seitokaichou ni chuukoku #a favourable wind is blowing in my translation direction

waterlilyrose

Show of hands: who else is surviving purely because of fanfiction right now? Because if I couldn't read about my favourite idiots getting stuck in different time periods, in ridiculous scenarios and then having maddeningly good sex, I wouldn't get up in the morning.

The world sucks. Thank you Archive Of Our Own writers. I truly love you.

writeouswriter

Look, if I introduced a WIP on here excitedly and then promptly never mentioned it again, it doesn’t mean I’m not working on it, it means I’m slowly rotating it in my mind like a rotisserie chicken and then went out to the grocery store to buy several other rotisserie chickens while I wait for it to cook and then slowly started rotating those rotisserie chickens and repeat

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bipeds

being a fan of naruto in this day and age is like….it’s just you and your thirty page thesis on konoha’s corrupt military system

sasuke-uchi-hoe

reirashi

You know what though, I recently reread milestone chapters for the sake of fanfic research and instead of making it easier for me to write it made it significantly harder because I realised just how fucked up the hierarchy of decisions and judicial system (if it can even be called that) is in Naruto. Its like “ahh the Uchiha’s be rebelling again, should we sit here and discuss how we can create a safe environment to conduct peace talks and move forward together as a society?” - “thats a great idea, but instead lets just kill em all, force one of their own to do it, and viola problem solved”

Like fuck did no one think about the trauma that would cause for society as a whole?? What about the people who were friends with the clan and had relationships with them?? And thats only the tip of the iceberg, lets not forget what drove Nagato to forming Akatsuki? All that neglect? And im sorry, Obito was left for dead, picked up by a weirdo, went untethered, managed to get a one up on the famed yondaime and yet NO ONE knew???

Like bitch wheres the investigators in any of these situations?? You have ninja and law but no form of policing? Oh wait, they were killed during the massacre

#i have many many feelings about the series of events in naruto #on the one hand its actually a very intelligent story #on the other hand how did they as a society or a existence in general manage to survive for so long

goatsandgangsters

heavy is the folder that holds the wips

supercalvin

*re-reads own fics when having writer’s-block* Wow I wish I could write like this :/

guqin-and-flute

Brief Summary of Jin Guangyao’s Mental State in Guanyin Temple

reirashi

I’m crying this is exactly how it went down, no one can tell me otherwise

#the untamed

Translations on pause

Seitokaicho ni chuukoku translations will be back in mid/late-March once I get access to PS again, updates should be fairly regular after that.

#seito kaichou ni chuukoku

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Seitokaichou ni chuukoku chap 68 is now up

https://www.mangago.me/read-manga/seito_kaichou_ni_chuukoku/

Believe me I would work on these much quicker if I wasn’t quite literally drowning under deadlines and at this point can’t distinguish my head from my ass as both are underwater.

I’m grateful the chapters are so short because it makes it more manageable to work on with so little time, but also apologetic to the readers, because yeah its pretty shit for them to end so quick.

#seitokaichou ni chuukoku #Seito Kaichou ni Chuukoku #manga translation

Halfway through chap 68! This chapter has SO MANY doki doki sfx, and I’m just staring confused for ten minutes like, is this a “badump” or a “thump”!?

#translations #seitokaichou ni chuukoku

legen-waitforit-dairy

I’ve decided that starting a 50k+ fanfic at 3 in the morning when you have to wake up early is not a rookie mistake but in fact a time honored tradition of ao3 veterans

#i feel this #soul deep #the good ideas come exclusively at 3am #in that short slither of night between sunrise #and falling asleep with your eyes open #your brain just jolts to life like an old car #brimming with ideas that scream at your hands like #WRITE ME BITCH #or esle forget me by the morning

Seitokaichou ni chuukoku chap 67 is now up:

https://www.mangago.me/read-manga/seito_kaichou_ni_chuukoku/

I used a new font system this time and it looks so so much better. I think I might need to make it bigger next time, but they switch so often between lots of speech and little speech, and I like to keep the sizing consistent.

#seitokaichou ni chuukoku #manga translation #might update much quicker next chap #a favourable wind is blowing in my translation direction

Chapter 14 of Kismet, now up!

"Itachi." Sakura's voice though barely a whisper, was loud in the silent, still room, where there were no ambient sounds beside the buzzing of a single light bulb.

It was a rare occasion when Itachi was caught off guard, intelligent and perceptible as he was. Yet here he was frozen in place with no angle to defend himself should he need to, the surprise in his expression clear at the unexpected visit. Either he had been deep in thought, or he had thought it safe enough that no one else besides Sakura were likely to turn up.

Which begot the thought, did he come here often?

Continue reading here!

#naruto #fanfiction #fanfic #itasaku #itachi x sakura

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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eltiolimon

Just one moments in The Road was enough to make me ship them xD, I'm a basic, so what???? XD

reirashi

By @eltiolimon ! Its been so long since I started writing Kismet, and just Itachi/Sakura fanfiction in general, that the well of fanart has truly dried up, which is why I’m so happy to see new art of them, and by one of my fav artists ❤️

#naruto #itasaku

Seitokaichou ni chuukoku chap 66 is upppp:

https://www.mangago.me/read-manga/seito_kaichou_ni_chuukoku/

#Seitokaichou ni chuukoku #translations #is this gonna be a regular thing?#who knows

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