۵ isa ۵

welcome to the museum

requests are ➵ open for blurbs!

send a 🤍 for a line or snippet of a wip!

(plus einstein’s finally reshooting with melissa fumero like ok so we won actually !!)

regarding The Sound of Heartbreak:

i’ll be totally honest, i don’t know if i will continue it. i want to, but trying to figure out how to continue the fic in the direction i was originally aiming feels… wrong? like, rereading the fic for reference’s sake to work on the continuation made me kind of realize that, unfortunately, a relationship like this is simply not sustainable nor healthy.

spencer was still grieving over maeve and hadn’t moved on from her, and in his eyes, reader was kind of an outlet to push his love onto that he was never able to do for maeve. which is why he kind of… did things that would, in a way, shape her into what maeve was. teaching her chess, reading certain books to her, talking about certain topics.

if i do ever do a continuation—which i would absolutely love to do, don’t get me wrong—i don’t know if i could do it in the original direction i had planned.

mostly because this fic is kind of self expression and exploration, in a way, for me. angel is based mostly on myself, and recently, while I haven’t been actively writing much (life has been busy, unfortunately), I have found that my self respect and understanding and love has changed since i originally wrote/planned this fic/series. and in reality? i don’t think I would ever go back to someone who tried to mold me into someone else. even if that someone was spencer reid. it just feels like self sabotage. and im sorry about that, but i really hope you can understand it.

regarding records!reader:

i love that so many people love this series like genuinely dewey is my lil cryptid and i adore her SO much. i have what i want to say is about half of encyclopedic written out, but i seem to have a lot of difficulty with writing casefics, ive found. there’s a lot of detail and such that goes into writing them, and being at the place im in lately it’s super hard to get into the right headspace to write all of those details in correctly, in a way that im satisfied with.

regarding all other fics:

this is where there’s better news, i promise. ive written around ~3k words across two different fics—one is super fluffy and the other is casefic-adjacent. im hoping that, if life is kind and gives me time and the right energy, i can have the fluffy one wrapped up and, ideally, posted by feb.

and it works so well bc like… maeve makes SO much sense as the felice of spencer’s life. first love, tragic, yearning, whatever. but milena is this love that hits him when he’s broken. that scares him. that he doesn’t think he deserves.

in letters to felice, their letters (specifically his to her) are filled with yearning, anxiety, insecurity, neurotic overthinking to the point of panic. it’s romantic, but scared. it’s “i want you but i don’t know how to be loved and i don’t think i can handle it.”

in letters to milena, their letters (especially his to her) are more existential, longing, almost… obsessive, in a way. guilt, desire, self-loathing, intimacy, fear, and ultimately, love and salvation. franz believed she was, like… spiritually fused to him, in a way. it was his most intense, soul-baring love.