Reflections from the Road.

This is my first post here and... honestly, I’m not quite sure what I’m doing or how this works. 😅 But I guess it doesn’t really matter. Tumblr reminds me of fond memories from my middle school days when I used to blog a bit. Out of sentiment, I’d like to return to that – and now seems like a good time since I’m trying to write something.

It’s not always an easy road, so I thought it would be nice to share some little things from this process. I’m not cut out for TikTok, and I don’t really feel the chemistry with IG. But here? Here, everything feels simpler and more special (or at least it used to be).

I used to call my notes “Reports from the Road.” I still like that term, so I named this blog “Reflections from the road” – stories from the journey. Don’t expect regularity, though, because that’s not something I’ve ever been good at. 🙈

I plan to post my thoughts, repost things that fit the vision of my story, and sometimes write about what’s playing in my soul. Maybe it’ll interest you, maybe you’ll stick around a little longer. Either way, welcome, and thanks for being here!

What brought you to Tumblr? Do you feel that same kind of nostalgia? 💭

The end of the year always brings with it a certain strange mood - and this one was particularly intense and maybe even irritating.

December definitely didn't spoil me. Colds, poor well-being, lack of time and energy… All of this made me distance myself from writing, which only deepened my stagnation. What hurt me the most was the lack of strength to create. And now, when you can already feel the arrival of a new year in the air, there's this strange feeling of suspension - seemingly peace, but not quite knowing what to do with yourself in these last days 😒

I don't want to sound like a cheap corporate motivator (although working in an office, I'm probably closer to this world than I'd like to admit. And corporate motivational nonsense both amuses and… motivates me. How was it? Learning through play? Maybe there's something to it) BUT I'm not going to give up. On the contrary - I want to move on, achieve my goal, finish this story and share it with others.

After all, a year is more than just one month. In 2024, I learned one very important thing: focus on yourself, follow your heart, and find something to which you will devote yourself completely.

It was this year that I started actively working on Acta Est Fabula. The turning point was the end of September, when my vacation was approaching. I wasn't going anywhere, so I looked at myself critically and thought: "Ika, you've been carrying this story inside you for over six years. If not now, then when? Do you really want to spend this week scrolling through your phone?" And so from that moment on, writing became a part of my everyday life - more or less regular, but present. Even in moments when I couldn't sit down to write, the story was still somewhere in the back of my mind, reminding me that it was waiting for its place on "paper".

Supposedly, the first half of 2025 is supposed to be a good time for Gemini ♊️ - I hope it's true, because I have ambitious plans, and I'm already implementing some of them.

On the occasion of the upcoming new year, I wish you all perseverance in pursuing your goals. And, most importantly, the courage to focus on yourself and your well-being 💗 🥳

Today I would like to share with you the first two paragraphs of my novel – the ones that started it all. 📖✨ Although the text has already undergone many changes, I want to be honest with you. Working on such a large project is a constant search, improvement and rediscovery – in a word: changes, changes, changes…

A lighter. A fire. A small flame. Inhalation and exhalation, clouds of thick smoke. I could smell spring rain in the air. The day was quite pleasant; the sun gently broke through the heavy, gray clouds, giving me hope for the rest of the warm day. At times, my hands trembled slightly, revealing the emotions hidden inside me. Tension and a specific, thick atmosphere accompanied me from the moment I woke up. I felt anxiety that settled in my stomach, almost reaching my throat. That day, various feelings, usually unpleasant, were swirling inside me. But above all, I thought about the fact that I would be playing out this scenario for the third time. I adjusted my glasses and took a drag on my cigarette, looking at the bulky, gray building. I clearly felt a sense of minority next to it, perhaps because of my previous experiences. However, for many residents of this backwater city, this building was one of the few symbols of modernity and good taste, and above all, prestige. Despite this common opinion, for a long time this building had not stood out in any way to me. A large gray block, completely without character. Bland. My gaze wandered over the raw walls, which seemed to absorb every shade of light, thus reflecting the darkness and corruption hidden inside. This place had already opened the door to a new world and numerous prospects for me twice - it did not work out. That is why, standing there on this spring day, I hesitated whether it was worth entering once again. Did its interior really hide the potential of new possibilities?

Randy Ingermanson, an American writer and teacher of creative writing, has developed a scheme by which you can plan a novel from the general to the specific - this is the snowflake method. ❄️

The first step is to write, a very general sentence that is a summary of the novel. This task is both trivial and difficult. The, shorter the better. The, less the better. And yet, there must be a whole enclosed in it.

In my case, this sentence sounds like this:

A young boy wants to get into an art college, but his path gets complicated when secrets of loved ones come to light.

I have another memory that recently came back to me as I was going through old notes. I felt there was something in it that fits the atmosphere of Acta Est Fabula. It’s a small thought, a moment from the past, which might even become part of this story.

Here’s the original entry I found from that day:

We were in another city yesterday, searching for a missing person. The woman had left a farewell letter and two children behind. And we walked through the night, in a foreign city, not knowing if we were looking for a living person or a corpse. We really didn’t know anything. It was an interesting, yet heavy experience. We walked through abandoned houses, sidetracks... It was past midnight, and we were in an abandoned house by a cemetery. Wild plants were growing around the house, and there was a ladder leaning on one of them. Everything played with our imagination. And the thought – is the person there, or not? The great unknown. Fortunately, no one was there. A street with factories, a field, and a quad bike track, engulfed in darkness. The next day, the body was found hanging in a tree.

I’d love to share more with you, but my work on the text is still evolving. A few weeks ago, I decided to reorganize the plot of my novel – to rethink it thoroughly and plan it out better. It was a huge step for me, one that allowed me to view this story from a fresh perspective. ✨ Thanks to this, I’ve gotten to know my characters much better – their motivations and their secrets.

Soon, I’d like to introduce them to you – to reveal who they are and what they’re hiding. For now… #staytuned 💭📖

Acta Est Fabula is not just about dark and melancholic atmospheres. It is also a story about art and the artistic life – about those moments that stay with us forever when we create something with passion 🎨. In my gallery from my time at the art high school, you can find photos that capture this unique atmosphere – full of creative chaos, exploration, and the same aspects that accompany Acta Est Fabula.

These photos are not just souvenirs – they are my personal memories. Memories of still lifes I tried to capture on canvas, struggles with the brush, experiments with colors, as well as snapshots of shared moments with friends, which, despite the passage of time, still hold something elusive ✨. Especially since some of them are now just memories, to which I can no longer return.

I can’t clearly pinpoint when writing began for me. ✍️ However, I do remember when the first ideas for Acta Est Fabulacame to my mind at the very beginning of my studies, in 2018. Back then, I was stumbling in the dark, I didn’t quite feel it yet. It’s funny how everyone tells us, 'Start working on your goal here and now,' but I think we’re not always mature enough. Sometimes, we just need to find the right moment.

Once upon a time I wrote another text that I still like to this day. I won't deny that it's quite simple, and maybe even a little stupid or childish. Now, in hindsight, it reminds me of Rupi Kaur's work, but I still like her. 🌸

We love each other in French, we love each other in Spanish, soon we’ll start loving each other in Indian, and I still don’t know what love really is.

I once wrote a pseudo-poem. It might not have anything to do with Acta Est Fabula, but I’ve always wanted to share it with the world.

October 29, 2019 I’m riding through the city late in the afternoon, the sky almost black, spilling tears. The sorrow of unfulfilled nights poisons everyone with its melancholy. Riding this old tram, I pass people smoking cigarette after cigarette in store windows, gray clouds of smoke suspended in space. Two red dots, like blood. Wooden houses wedged into post-communist buildings. Older people making the sign of the cross by the church, waiting for salvation in the coming years. (Do they have any chance of salvation?) The street is flooded with wisdoms from mottos on the walls, and my favorite one – it’s all a little funny.

I wrote this piece one day while returning from university, it was on Line 4. Sadly, it no longer exists. 🚋

Hello, today I'll reveal a glimpse of the secret... while revealing nothing at all. 🌑✨

Sometimes, the most important things are hidden in the shadows. Sometimes, you have to lose everything to see the truth. #ActaEstFabula is a story about passion, betrayal, and discovering the boundaries we can cross to make our dreams come true. 💭💔"