I fell into the Coltland twins AU propaganda and with that, it made me think about The Fall Guy...
The one thing the movie had always seriously bugged me about was the fact that the movie made it seem like Colt just sort of... bounced back from his supposedly career-ending injury. Back to doing stunts that involve throwing himself at hard surfaces with his back...
I really enjoyed the movie, had a good laugh, but I was also wincing and tense the whole time. Because I have chronic lower back pain. And the pain was caused by a fall on my back too (Colt's injury was several thousand times worse than mine, you know!). That's why I was kind of surprised that Colt wasn't suffering from chronic pain or other back related complications.
The thing about chronic pain is that it makes you angry, depressed, hopeless, begging for a way out. Sometimes you're used to it, you can cope, and sometimes you're so tense, in pain and unable to relax that you want to crawl out of your own skin. That's why I never thought Colt deserved as much blame as he did, or maybe I just find him a little bit too relatable. That shit changes you for life and you won't ever be the same again.
Worse of all, you're entirely alone in it. Worse of all, it was an accident. Worse of all, you feel so horrible guilty for something that wasn't your fault, guilty of your body acting out against you. Things just happens, but why did it have to be you?
For years, and even now, I couldn't stand the sensation of lying on something flat. It sends me right back to the moment I fell. Perhaps Colt could've had a similar response... something that would've hindered his ability to do his job. Perhaps Colt would've had to compensate for his pain, and maybe he might face problems with finding someone who would hire him for his condition (treated as a liability), or have to deal with people going "But you seem fine yesterday?" "You don't look like you're in pain" etc.
With that said β Imagine you're Ryland Grace, and your twin Colt had a fall that could've killed him, and now he's isolating himself, angry and lashing out, ghosting everybody, ignoring your texts and calls.
He's a shell of himself, and there is nothing you can do.
Eventually, you reconcile with your twin, but both of you have to accept that things would never be the same again. There is so much guilt between the two of you but you carry on anyways, for each other.
And then you're sent off to space, and you never see your twin again. You're having a good life on Erid, but you'll never stop thinking about Colt, if he's still with Jody, if he's still in pain (that's a stupid question, he'll always be in pain), if he has any kids, if you might be an uncle now.
As for Colt, he's left with echoes of a man that shared a womb and his face.
The pain of separation might be even worse than the pain in his back, after all.
baratheonpilled
snowghoul
theartofmadeline
dailybridgerton
yousharknotpass
