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a forever child evening scorpio 172 cm tall can't stop writing on the drawing pages the words are bursting out of him like canaries

#notes of me #alone #journaling #journal #poem

#sketchbook #aftg #aftg fanart #niel josten #the foxhole court

Petr Nikl - Herbář, 2026

#red and gray together #art exhibition #painting #symetry

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Heidi Bivens - Euphoria Fashion

mybookcoverarchive

#book cover archive #book cover #book design

you really think you'll never fall off a motorbike until you fall of a motorbike

i'll be humbly regrowing my skinsuit in bed for the next couple of days

#lesson learned #i hope #louis de pointe du lac

#dyed an old diy fail corset top to black but the red paint still seeps through so now it's my vampire attire #sketchbook #illustration #autoportrait #art #blue tiger

wiping off the brush

#art #collage #experimental art #scaned #scan #watercolor #symetry

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Gozo 2024

thinking about the cave almost every day

missing my piranesi soundtrack almost every day

#watercolor #sketchbook #sea illustration #sea photography #sea #malta

#ladybugs all over #photography #dyptich

naybunii

grrl-beetle

Marc Jacobs

#marc jacobs #ss27 #marc jacobs ss27

what stayed after four summer days of friends

reading All the Lovers in the Night by Mieko Kawakami

#reading #summer reading #henna tattoo #diptych

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i've spent the last year striving to present more masculine, cutting my hair shorter and shorter, building up the courage and getting used to it, playing into a crush that i don't reciprocate because they see it in me, the masculinity. selfish little play. last time i cut it shorter it was their idea and it was too short to see myself in it. they loved it and i finally understood Caitlin from We Are Who We Are so after a few days I dyed it red as always and cut micro bangs as always, plucked my eyebrows thinner and shaved my chin, grasping onto the femininity which was mine.

it seemed like backing down but felt like taking a breath. gender is confusing, it is so easy to lean too far to one side when on the run from the other and not even notice. noticing is all there is, noticing what is comfortable, which is sometimes different from what you think you want or like or think you should want or like. noticing what's "me" is all there is and this haircut and the selfish little play were not it.

it's hard to master my own rules of this masc–fem blend of clothes, makeup, accessories, hair, stuff and things but I'm trying, otherwise I'd be standing in front of the mirror for hours wondering why I look good but feel bad, trying to swallow a lump in my throat that's not really there. so i must keep my eyes wide and keep noticing which compositions in this pile of fashion are truly "me"

#don't let myself be shaped into unrecognasibility by tunnel vision and my inattention or compliments and welcomes of others #gender #gender expression #genderqueer #gender identity #nonbinary #we are who we are

#photography #photo collage

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