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pairing. flynn rider ! martin / f ! rapunzel reader
warnings + info. oneshot, fantasy au, tangled retelling, strangers to lovers, not exactly parallel to the movie so don't be confused if some things are different, kissing, violence, imagine messyhaired!tin ok?, features many people you know and love ;)
synopsis. a handsome thief hiding from his crimes picks the wrong tower to climb into, and the girl locked inside it has been waiting her whole life for an excuse to leave.
wc. 18.3k
maddy's note. i marinated on this idea for ages and finally it has come to fruition so i cannot wait for u guys to read it π! ik my martin girls are heavily deprived so this ones for u guys hehehe but especially for meri @griinspire and pearl @marsgirltyshi and lili @chocom0ka (and seulbi but she's Gone off blr) because no one does martins gf like they do ππ!!!
there is no playlist for this because, well, it has a soundtrack of its own and quite frankly i'm a little lazy to compile songs rn............. #iseethelighttruther
tagging 90% of Core15 bc they yell at me @kaikaikoi @hyuneskkami @hollyoongs @aerinettes
Once upon a time, in a kingdom nestled between green mountains and a sea the color of jade, there was born a princess.
Of course, like any other fairytale, she was not born ordinary. On the night before her birth, a single drop of moonlight was said to have fallen from the sky and rooted itself into the earth, blooming into a flower that glowed gold from root to petal. The palace healers, desperate to save the queen who lay dying in childbed, ground the flower into a tea and poured it past her lips, and by morning the queen lived, and by evening the princess was born with a single lock of hair that shone like sunlight caught in silk.
The kingdom rang bells for three days. The king wept. The people lit lanterns and floated them on the river in thanks to whatever gods had seen fit to spare their queen and gift them a princess who glowed.
But the flower's magic had not vanished when it was boiled into tea. It had simply movedβinto the girl. Into her hair, which did not merely shine but healed, which did not merely glow but sang low and golden when the right words were spoken over it, undoing wounds, softening age, drawing sickness out of the body like poison from a wound.
There was a woman in the kingdomβnever young, never quite old, a woman the years seemed to slide off of like water off stoneβwho had known about the flower long before the healers ever found it. She had kept it hidden for a hundred years, using its magic to keep herself exactly as she wished to remain. When it was taken from her and given to a queen and consumed by a birth she had no part of, something in her curdled.
She was called, by then, only Mother.
She came for the princess on a night when the moon was new and the palace slept heavy with relief. She did not take the flower. She took the girl instead, because the girl was the flower now, and she carried her from the palace in the dark and up into the mountains, to a tower with no door, only a single window round as an eye, hidden behind a curtain of waterfall and stone.
She raised the princess as her own. She told her that the world outside was full of people who would tear her apart for the power in her hair, that the tower was the only place she would ever be safe, that Mother's loveβsharp-edged and conditional and always, always followed by but you know I only want what's best for youβwas the only love the girl would ever need.
The king and queen sent lanterns into the sky every year on their daughter's birthday, thousands of them, gold as the flower that had saved the queen's life, in the small and stubborn hope that somewhere, somehow, their daughter would see them and know she was being waited for.
The girl in the tower saw them. Every year, from her window, she watched the far-off sky fill with floating light and never once knew they were for her.
She only knew that something in her chest ached every time the horizon lit up gold, and she never could explain why.
The king and queen never stopped hoping. Every year, when the lanterns had all burned low and drifted back down to the water, the queen would stand alone at the highest window of the palace a while longer than anyone else, watching the dark where the last of the light had gone, and the king would come find her there, and neither of them would say anything at all, because there was nothing left to say that eighteen years of the same silent vigil hadn't already said a hundred times over. They kept her room exactly as it had been. They never once let themselves call it a memorial, because a memorial was for something that was over, and they had never once let themselves believe it was over.
The kingdom, for its part, grew used to the grief the way kingdoms doβfolding it quietly into tradition, into the yearly ritual of light, into a story told to children at bedtime about a princess who might, one day, come home. Most had stopped truly expecting it. The lanterns kept rising anyway. Hope, it turned out, didn't require belief to keep going. It only required someone willing to light the wick one more time.
You had lived eighteen years in that tower, and in that time you had become, out of sheer boredom and stubbornness, extremely accomplished.
You could grind ink and paint mountains that looked like the ones you'd never climbed. You could play the gayageum until your fingers bled and then keep playing anyway. You'd taught yourself to read faster than Mother liked, to argue better than Mother liked, to want more than Mother liked, though you were careful never to let her see the wanting directly. You kept it folded small, tucked behind your ribs, brought out only at night with the shutters closed, when you traced the shapes of mountains you'd painted from imagination and wondered what they smelled like up close.
Kono did not approve of the wanting.
Kono was small, no longer than your forearm, built more like a lizard than the great serpentine dragons painted on temple ceilings, but for the two soft antler-like horns that curled back from his brow and the faint iridescent sheen to his scales that shifted blue to green to gold depending on how the light caught himβthe exact shifting, you'd always thought, of oil on water, or of a fish turning in a stream. He had a long tail he liked to wrap possessively around your wrist, small clawed feet that could grip silk without snagging it, and an expression, for a creature with no eyebrows, of near-constant and deeply personal disappointment in you.Β
He had been left on your windowsill as a hatchling the summer you turned nine, small and starving and furious about it, and had simply never left, and you had never really asked why a mountain temple's guardian creature had abandoned his post to live with a girl in a tower, and he had never told you.
He was, as far as you'd ever heard, meant to bring luck. You mostly found this funny.
"I'm just saying," you told him, that particular evening, standing at the window with your chin in your hands, watching the light change over the tree line, "that if I have to hear one more story about how the outside world is full of ruffians and cutthroats waiting specifically for me, I might actually go looking for the ruffians and cutthroats just to see if they're more interesting than staying here."
Kono made a small, unimpressed noise and flicked his tail against your neck.
"You're right, you're right. Bad plan." You sighed, and the sigh fogged faintly against the cool evening air. "But it's my birthday in three days, Kono. Eighteen years old, and I've never once stood in actual dirt. Do you know how insane that is?"
He blinked his round eyes at you, which you had long since learned to interpret as yes, obviously, I have been here the entire time, why are you telling me this like it's news.
You didn't get to finish making your case, because that was the exact moment something enormous and irritable and coated in mud came flying over the tree line, followed at some distance by two men on horseback who were shouting in a way that suggested this was not a friendly race.
You watched, chin still in your hands, as the fleeing shapeβa horse, you realized, a truly furious-looking horse with no riderβthundered off in one direction, and the men gave up the chase and doubled back toward the waterfall instead, toward the tower, toward the one place in this entire kingdom that was not supposed to be findable.
Kono went rigid against your shoulder.
You, if you were being fully honest with yourself, felt something in your chest that was not quite fear. It sat right alongside the fear, close enough to be mistaken for it, but it wasn't fear.
It was closer to finally.
His name, you would learnβthough not for several more extremely tense minutesβwas Martin Edwards, and he arrived through your window the way a cat arrives through a window: badly, loudly, and with absolutely no acknowledgment that he might be intruding.
He tumbled onto your floor in a graceless heap of limbs, dragging a satchel that clinked with something metal, and had approximately one and a half seconds to register that the tower he'd chosen at complete random to hide in was, in fact, occupied, before you brought the singing bowl down over his head with every ounce of strength eighteen years of restless boredom had built into your arms.
The bowl rang out, low and resonant, an actual musical note hanging in the air over the sound of him crumpling sideways into your dried-flower arrangement.
You stood over him, bowl still raised, breathing hard, and felt, for the first time in your entire life, genuinely and thoroughly alive.
He groaned. He was, you noted with some irritation, extremely tall even lying down, all long limbs folded wrong across your floor, and even unconscious his face had the specific, punchable quality of someone who had never once in his life doubted that he was the most charming person in any room he walked into.
Kono skittered down your arm to the floor and approached the stranger with the deep suspicion of a creature sizing up a rival. He sniffed once at Martin's outstretched hand, apparently found it lacking, and turned his back on it with as much dignity as a small dragon draped in mud-splattered iridescent scales could manage.
You dragged the intruderβwith considerable effort, and a truly staggering amount of complaining directed at Kono, who offered zero helpβinto your wardrobe, and shut the door, and sat down hard on your bed with your heart going like a struck drum.
Ruffians and cutthroats, you thought, a little hysterically. Right on schedule.
He woke up loud, which you supposed made sense, given everything else about him so far.
"βokay, okay, I'm awake, I'm awake, get theβ" He kicked the wardrobe door open with a force that sent your good winter coats sliding off their hooks and staggered out into the room with both hands raised, blinking against the lamplight, and then his eyes landed on you, standing across the room with the singing bowl held out in front of you like a shield, and something in his face actually, genuinely, lit up.
"Oh," he hummed. "Hello."
"Don't move," you said.
"I'm not moving." He did not stop moving. His eyes were doing a slow, assessing sweep of the roomβthe window, the wardrobe, you, the bowl, back to youβthat you didn't love the feeling of. "Nice place. Veryβcozy. Homey. Round. You don't get a lot of round rooms."
"I said don't move."
"I'm being extremely still." He took a single, deliberate step sideways, testing you, and you swung the bowl an inch closer to his skull, and he froze with both hands up again, and something that might have been the beginning of respect crossed his face. "Okay. Fair. Noted."
Up close, in better light, he was infuriatingly good-looking in a way you resented on principle. Tallβtaller than anyone had a right to be in a low-ceilinged tower room. This ruffian was blond in a country where you'd never once seen hair that color (not that youβd really seen any other existing humans).
He had this odd and loose, careless confidence that suggested he'd never had to work particularly hard for anything, including, apparently, avoiding capture, since two very large men had chased him halfway across a mountain and he still looked more amused than afraid.
"Who are you," you snarled, "and how did you find this tower?"
"Martin Edwards." He said it like it should mean something to you. When your expression didn't change, an emotion flickered across his faceβannoyance, maybe, or the specific wound of a man whose name usually did land. "You've truly never heard of me."
"I've never heard of anyone. I live in a tower."
"Right. Yes. Fair point, very fair, I did notice theβtower situation." He gestured vaguely at the room, the window, the general concept of your entire life. "Look, I didn't find this place, I was being chased, I saw a hole in a wall of rock, I went through the hole. This was not a planned visit. I have no interest in yourβtower. Your life. Any of it. I just need to lay low for a bit and then I will be very happy to climb right back out that window and never think about any of this again."
You considered him. You considered the satchel, which he'd dropped by the wardrobe door, and which had made a very specific metallic clinking sound when he fell.
"What's in the bag?"
His whole body changedβjust slightly, just for a second, a flicker of genuine alarm before the easy charm slid back over it like a curtain. "Nothing that concerns you."
"It's in my room."
"It's in my possession."
"You're in my tower."
"Okay, fine, guess thatβsβactually a decent point." He exhaled through his nose, glanced at the window, seemed to calculate something, and then said, with the air of a man laying down a very reasonable trump card: "Tell you what. You let me leave, quietly, no fuss, and I forget this entire evening ever happened. Bag included. Everyone wins."
You should have said yes. Laterβmuch later, with the wind in your hair and your heart still going too fast in your chestβyou would think about how easy it would have been to say yes, to open the window, to let him climb back out into the night and never know what you'd almost missed.
Instead you looked past him, out your one round window, at the darkening sky, and you thought about lanterns you'd never seen up close and mountains you'd only ever painted from guesswork, and you heard yourself say, "No."
He blinked. "No?"
"You're going to take me somewhere."
"I am not."
"There's a light show. Lanterns. Every year, on theβ" you almost said my birthday, and swallowed it, some old instinct telling you not to hand a stranger that particular thread to pull. "There's a light in the sky, every year, from the direction of the kingdom. I want to see it up close. You're going to take me, and then you can have your littleβ¦ bag back."
"You don't have my bag."
"I know where you left it," you said, which was true, and gestured with your chin at Kono, who had, in the general chaos, quietly and with great personal satisfaction dragged the satchel across the floor and was now sitting on top of it with the smug posture of a creature who understood exactly what leverage was.
Martin looked at the dragon. The dragon looked at Martin. Something passed between them that you didn't fully understand yet but would come, over the following days, to recognize as the opening shot of a genuinely long and deeply petty war.
"That thing is sitting on my satchel," Martin gasped, in the tone of a man who could not quite believe the indignity of his current situation.
"His name is Kono."
"I don't care what his name is, he is sitting on myβ"
"He's very protective," you said, not entirely truthfully, since Kono's motives had far more to do with spite than protection, but you weren't about to admit that. "So. Lanterns. Then your bag. Then you go wherever it is men with bags full of clinking things go."
Martin looked at you for a long moment. He truly looked, in a way that made you resist the urge to fold your arms over your chest, and then rubbed both hands down his face and groaned like a man who'd already lost an argument he hadn't realized he was having.
"You," he chuckled in what you assume to be sarcasm, "are going to be a problem."
"Probably," you agreed, and found, to your own surprise, that you were smiling.
"For the record," he added, already turning to inspect the window, testing the give of the shutter with one hand, "I don't actually do this. Escort duty. Tour guide. Whatever this is."
"You don't have much choice."
"I have plenty of choice, lady. I'm choosing to be gracious about a bad situation, there's a difference." He glanced back at you, something assessing in the look, like he was recalculating you from scratch now that the singing bowl had been lowered. "How far is this light show, anyway?"
"I don't actually know."
"You don'tβ" He closed his eyes briefly, the particular patience of a man doing math he didn't want to do. "You dragged me into a hostage negotiation for a destination you don't know the distance to."
"It's in the direction of the kingdom. I've watched it every year from the window. It can't be that far."
"'Can't be that far' has gotten men killed, you know."
"You'll live," you said, with far more confidence than you actually possessed, and went to go retrieve your good travelling shoes, leaving him standing by the window looking like a man reconsidering every choice that had led him to this particular evening.
You changed, too, while he waitedβout of the loose sleeping robes you'd been in when he'd fallen through your window and into the good hanbok you'd been saving, the one Mother had commissioned for a birthday you weren't allowed to leave the tower to celebrate.
Pale jeogori embroidered along the collar with thread the color of new leaves, the chima falling in soft, heavy folds you'd never actually walked any real distance in, sash tied the way you'd practiced a hundred times alone in front of a mirror with no one to see it.
It felt strange, dressing for a world you'd never been allowed into. It felt stranger still, catching your own reflection in the dark window glass, to think that you might actually look like you belonged there.
Were youβ¦ scared? No. Surely not. You wanted this. Itβs practically your lifeβs purpose. But what about Mother? She had kept you safe and protected from the evils of that world for all your life and wouldnβt this be taking that protection for granted?Β
"You're stalling," Martin called, from somewhere near the window.
"I'm preparing."
"You've re-tied that sash three times."
"It has to sit correctly or it'll come loose on the climb down."
"It's a piece of fabric, not a structural pillarβ"
"Do you want my help escaping or not?"
That, at least, bought you the silence you needed to finish, smoothing the last fold flat with hands that weren't quite steady, and when you finally turned around he'd gone quiet in a different way, something briefly, helplessly caught in his expression before he covered it with a cough and a very deliberate glance toward the window.
"Ready?" he asked.
"Ready," you said, and meant it more than you expected to.
Getting out of the tower took considerably longer than getting in, mostly because you insisted on doing it via the long braided rope of your own hairβwhich made Martin's expression do something complicated and slightly ill when you explained the general mechanics of your situationβand partly because you stopped four separate times on the way down to look at things. A bird. The particular texture of the moss on the tower's stone base. Your own hands, dirt-smudged for the first time in your life, which you held up in the fading light like they belonged to someone else.
"You're doing something weird with your face," Martin said, from where he was waiting with visibly diminishing patience at the base of the waterfall.
"What thing."
"Theβ" he gestured at your entire self, "βwide-eyed newborn puppy thing. It's very slow."
"I've never touched a river before."
"You've touched water before."
"Not river water. It's cold. It's moving. Did you know it does that? Justβmoves, constantly, going somewhereβ"
"Incredible information. Truly a marvel of the natural world. Can weβ"
"Give me one more minute."
You did not give him one more minute. You gave him closer to ten, crouched at the edge of the water with your skirts hiked up and your bare feet in the current, laughingβactually laughing, a real sound you weren't sure you'd made before, not like this, not from somewhere this deepβwhile Martin stood a respectful distance away with his arms crossed and an expression that was trying very hard to stay annoyed and mostly failing.
"You know," he said, eventually, watching you, "for a girl who apparently thinks the entire world is trying to eat her alive, you're taking this remarkably well."
"I never said the world was trying to eat me."
"You have the exact energy of someone who was told that, yes."
You didn't answer that, because it was uncomfortably accurate, and instead climbed back up onto the bank and reached for the little cloth bag Mother had never let you leave without, purely out of habitβand then remembered you'd left the tower entirely, that Mother was three days out at her own errand, that there was no one to sneak anything past anymore, and the freedom of that thought hit you somewhere just under your ribs hard enough that you had to sit with it a second.
Martin was watching your face do something complicated.
"You okay, Princess?"
You blinked at him. "What did you call me?"
"Princess." He shrugged easily, like he'd been waiting for an excuse. "Means gongju. You know. Lost girl, hidden tower, guarded like she's made of something preciousβyou have to admit it tracks."
"I'm not a princess."
"I didn't say you were. I said it tracks." He was grinning now, delighted with himself in a way that made you want to throw something at him. "There's an actual missing princess, you know. Whole kingdom's been mourning her for eighteen years. Lanterns every year on her birthday, the whole thing. Iβm guessing thatβs what youβre trying to see. Funny coincidence, a girl locked in a tower wanting to see the exact same lanterns."
"Coincidences happen."
"Sure they do." He fell into step beside you, hands tucked behind his head, entirely too pleased with the theory he was clearly not going to let go of. "Or, alternatively, I could just call you 'princess.' Would you prefer that? Since you don't know what it means. I mean, I'm sure a sheltered young lady like yourself, freshly escaped from an entire lifetime in a stone tower, wouldn't be familiar with a word like that. Itβs English. Very obscure. Very advanced."
"I know what it means, I was born here, same as you."
"Do you though? Prove it."
"I'm not proving anything to you."
"Because you can't."
"Because it's beneath me."
"There it is," he said, snapping his fingers, delighted. "Gongju behavior if I've ever seen it."
"I will push you into the river."
"You're welcome to try, princess."
"You know what's funny," Martin said, a little while later, once you'd both fallen into an easier walking rhythm and the sun had dropped low enough to gild the tops of the trees. "You never actually told me your name."
You hesitated. It wasn't that you didn't have oneβMother had given you one, early, though she'd used it so rarely, always preferring darling or sweet girl or, when she was displeased, no name at all, just a long and pointed silenceβit was that saying it out loud to a stranger on your first night outside a tower felt like handing over something you weren't sure yet was safe to hand over.
"I'm not telling you."
"Why not?"
"Because you'll use it against me somehow. You seem like the type."
"I am offended." He didn't sound offended. He sounded thrilled, the way he sounded about most things that gave him new material to work with. "Fine. Keep your mystery. I'll just keep calling you gongju, then, and everyone we meet is going to assume you actually are the missing princess, and it'll be your fault when the whole kingdom starts a rumor."
"Nobody's going to believe that."
"You'd be surprised what people believe about a girl who climbs out of a tower on a rope made of her own hair."
You didn't have a good answer for that, mostly because it was, again, unfairly accurate, and you settled instead for shoving him lightly with your shoulder, which did nothing except make him laugh.
"Say it, then," you said. "Princess. If that's what you're going to call me, I want to actually hear you say the real word, not just the joke version."
He said itβproperly this time, no mockery in it, the vowels landing soft and familiar in a way that startled you a little, like hearing a song you hadn't realized you knew the words to.
"There," he said. "Happy?"
"You're still not calling me that."
"I'm absolutely calling you that. It's efficient. It's accurate, probably. And frankly," he added, glancing sideways at you with something almost gentle underneath the usual smugness, "it suits you better than whatever your actual name is going to turn out to be."
"You don't even know my actual name."
"I don't need to. I've got a working theory and I like it. A sheltered young lady," he said, drawing the words out with exaggerated care, "freshly liberated from a tower, apparently unfamiliar with basic Korean vocabularyβreally, it all fits."
"I am not unfamiliar with basicβ"
"Prove it. What's gongju mean, then, if you know it so well?"
"It means princess, and you know I know that, you're just being insufferable on purpose."
"On purpose and very successfully," he agreed, entirely too pleased with himself, and you gave up trying to win the argument and let yourself, instead, enjoy the specific, unfamiliar pleasure of being teased by someone who clearly wasn't trying to hurt you with it.
You did not push him into the river, mostly because you were fairly sure you'd fall in with him, but you thought about it, hard, the entire rest of the walk, while he hummed something tuneless and infuriating under his breath and Kono rode along in the fold of your sleeve making small disapproving noises every time Martin so much as glanced in your direction.
You noticed, though you weren't going to say it out loud, that he never actually stopped. Princess. Not once, the rest of that day, or the day after, or any of the days that came after that. It stuck the way nicknames only stick when the person using them has decided, somewhere below the joking, that they mean it.
The wanted poster was nailed to a tree at the first crossroads you came to, curling slightly at the corners from weather, and you might have walked right past it if Martin hadn't gone abruptly, suspiciously quiet beside you.
You looked. Then you looked again, closer, and had to physically bite down on the inside of your cheek to keep from laughing.
It was, unmistakably, himβsame jaw, same insufferable eyebrows, same general air of a man who thought quite highly of himselfβexcept that whoever had drawn it had rendered his mouth as a row of crooked, gap-toothed, wildly uneven teeth, snaggled in every direction like a fence that had lost a fight with a storm.
"That is not accurate," Martin yelled, very fast, snatching the poster down off the tree before you could get a proper look.
"That isβthat is artistic license, that is a hack sketch artist with a grudge and no talent, my teeth areβ" he actually opened his mouth to demonstrate, tilting his head back, and you had to admit, unwillingly, that his teeth were in fact very straight, surprisingly white, entirely unremarkable in the best possible way. "See? Perfect. Immaculate. I have never once in my life had a complaint about my teeth, I get compliments on my teethβ"
"From who?"
"Fromβpeople. Women. Discerning women with excellent taste who appreciate a goodβ"
"It says here you're a wanted thief," you hummed, reading over his shoulder now that he'd lowered the poster in his outrage, "with a reward ofβ" you did the math and had to stop and reread it, "βthat is a genuinely enormous amount of money."
"It's inflated. That's aβthat's a gross exaggeration of my worth, I'm not worth that much, this is clearly aβ"
"You're arguing that you're worth less than a wanted poster says?"
"I'm arguing that the number is inaccurate, there's a difference, the number is clearly designed to encourage overzealous bounty hunting, it's a scare tacticβ"
"So you agree you're worth stealing."
"That is notβthat is not what I said, you're twisting my words, this is exactly the kind of thing I was worried about when you insisted on coming along, you're going to misquote me to guards at some point and get us bothβ"
"I'm just reading what's written."
He scoffed and kicked a rock. "You're reading it with inflection."
"I'm reading it with my normal voice."
"You said 'genuinely enormous amount of money' like it was a personal insult to me specifically."
"You seem more upset about the teeth than the wanted part."
"Because the wanted part is accurate," he said, with the flat honesty of a man too distracted by dental slander to bother lying. "I am wanted. I did steal something. The teeth, though. The teeth are slander."
"What did you steal?"
He hesitatedβand it was the first genuinely unguarded pause you'd seen from him all dayβand then folded the poster into quarters and shoved it into his satchel with a little more force than necessary. "Doesn't matter. Ancient history. Water under the bridge."
"You stole it approximately six hours ago."
"Extremely ancient, in relative terms." He set off walking again, faster than before, and you had to jog a few steps to catch up, Kono digging tiny claws into your shoulder to keep his balance.
"You're not going to tell me."
"I am not."
"Is it the crown," you guessed, because you'd caught the edge of gold in the satchel earlier, glinting when Kono had dragged it across the floor, and you watched his shoulders go very slightly, very deliberately stiff.
"No," he said, in a tone that meant yes, and you decided, generously, to let him have it, mostly because you were far more interested in the actual horse that had just come thundering around the bend in the road, nostrils flaring, eyes locked on Martin with an expression of pure, personal, long-simmering rage.
"Oh, no," Martin said.
"Is thatβ"
"That is Woojoo, yes, that is my horse, that is a long, complicated relationshipβ"
Woojoo did not stop for pleasantries. He came at Martin like a man settling a debt, and the next several minutes dissolved into a genuinely spectacular chase around a small clearing that involved Martin climbing a tree, Woojoo standing guard at the base of said tree with the patient menace of a creature who had all the time in the world, and you sitting on a fallen log with Kono, watching, thoroughly entertained.
"He's not usually like this," Martin called down, from somewhere in the upper branches.
"He seems very consistent, actually."
"Okay, he's exactly like this, every time, it'sβwe have history, this horse and I, it's complicatedβ"
"He's a horse."
"He's vindictive, is what he is, he's been trying to get me arrested for two years, that's not normal horse behavior, that's a personal vendettaβ"
Kono made a small, delighted chattering noise beside you, which you were beginning to understand meant something close to finally, someone gets it, and when you glanced down at him he was watching Woojoo with what could only be described as newfound professional respect.
"What exactly did you do to him," you called up, watching Woojoo pace a slow, deliberate circle around the base of the tree, occasionally rearing to paw at the lowest branch just to remind Martin he had options.
"I didn't do anything, he's just been like this since I acquired him."
"You stole him."
"I acquired him. There's a nuance."
"From who?"
"From a royal stable, technically, but in my defense he was clearly unhappy there, high-strung, difficult, the stablemaster hated himβI did him a favor, honestly, and this is the thanks I get, two years of relentless, targeted footwear-based revengeβ"
Woojoo, as if personally offended by the retelling, reared up again with a furious whinny and got one hoof solidly against the trunk hard enough to shake the branch Martin was gripping, sending down a small shower of leaves and one extremely undignified yelp.
"He understood that," you gasped and shook your head. "He understood every word of that and he took offense."
"Horses don't understand language."
"This one might."
"This one is a menace, is what he is," Martin said, adjusting his grip with the particular caution of a man who had recently reconsidered his life choices, "a genuine menace who has decided, for reasons known only to himself, that his sole purpose on this earth is making my life difficultβ"
You decided, watching the standoff continue with no signs of resolving itself, that this was likely to go on for some time if left entirely to the two of them, and so you climbed down off your log, brushed off your skirts, and walked directly up to Woojoo with far more confidence than you actually felt.
He swung his great head toward you, ears pinned, nostrils flaring, and for a moment you thought you'd badly misjudged the situationβand then, slowly, his ears came up, and he leaned his head down toward you with something almost curious, blowing a warm breath across your palm when you held it out.
"There," you murmured. "See? I'm not the one who stole an apple from your feed bag."
"You heard about the apple thingβ" Martin's voice, muffled and betrayed, from somewhere above.
Woojoo made a low, satisfied sort of noise, nudging his nose against your shoulder, and you had the distinct impression, ridiculous as it was, that you had just been recruited onto a very specific and very committed team.
It took another twenty minutes, a great deal of undignified negotiating, andβeventuallyβyou stepping in to physically stand between horse and man with your hands raised in a gesture of peace, before Woojoo agreed, with visible reluctance, to a temporary truce, on the conditionβas far as you could interpret from a horse's expressionβthat he got to walk close enough to occasionally, "accidentally," step on the back of Martin's boot.
"This is humiliating," Martin muttered, as you all set off again, horse and dragon flanking either side of you like a pair of extremely judgmental honor guards.
"I think it's going great," you said, and meant it.
The hanok appeared out of the trees just as the light was going properly gray, low and wide-roofed in the old style, warm lantern-light spilling from its paper windows, smoke curling from a chimney with the smell of something roasting.
"Absolutely not," Martin said, the second he clocked it. "No. We're walking past this. This is a place I have specifically, personally, at great cost, learned to walk past."
"Why?"
"Because it's full of the single worst collection of degenerates in this entire kingdom, and every single one of them would sell me out for a fraction of that reward money without blinking."
"So we're not going in."
"We are absolutely not going in."
You went in.
In your defense, you hadn't fully decided to defy him so much as your feet had simply kept walking while your brain was still weighing the pros and cons, and by the time Martin caught up to grab your sleeve you were already three steps through the door. Into a low, smoke-hazed room packed with the strangest assembly of people you had ever seen in your entireβadmittedly very limitedβexperience of people.
There was a man built like a small mountain, missing most of his teeth, gently carving what appeared to be a delicate wooden hairpin. There was someone in the corner whose face you genuinely could not parse in the low lightβtoo many angles, somehow, like looking at a person through cracked glassβquietly mending a fan.
There were twin brothers arm-wrestling with murderous focus over what turned out, on closer inspection, to be a single dumpling. Someone had a pet weasel draped around their neck like a scarf. Someone else appeared to be knitting something with visibly too many needles. The whole room smelled like woodsmoke and old rice wine and something underneath that you couldn't place and didn't especially want to.
Every single head in the room turned when the door swung shut behind you.
"We're leaving," Martin said, very quietly, into your ear.
"Is that Martin Edwards?" said the mountain-sized man with the hairpin, in a voice that dropped the temperature of the room several degrees.
"No," Martin said.
"That's definitely him," said someone else.
"That is notβokay, fine, hi, yes, hello everyone, lovely establishment, we're just passing throughβ"
What followed was, by your private accounting, one of the strangest and best evenings of your entire life.
It started with the reward moneyβsomeone in the back producing a slightly more accurate wanted poster, teeth and all, and passing it around with escalating commentary, the twins, apparently named Seonghyeon and Juhoon, abandoning their dumpling war entirely to lean over and study Martin's face against the drawing with academic seriousnessβand slid, somehow, without your ever quite catching the exact moment it happened, into a full-throated, half-drunk, wildly enthusiastic taunting song, the whole room joining in verse by verse, about every humiliating thing anyone in the establishment had ever heard about Martin Edwards.
The man with the weasel started it, banging a wooden cup against the table for rhythm, and it snowballed from there the way these things always seemed to in a room full of people who'd clearly been waiting years for an excuse.
Oh, the boy who came from nowhere, with his smile and his fine clothesβthinks he's someone, thinks he's special, thinks the whole wide kingdom knows,
sang the man with the weasel, and the twins picked it up without missing a beat, still slightly out of breath from the dumpling war,
but we remember when he begged us for a bowl of rice, a place to sleepβnow he struts around in silk scraps calling himself something deep!
"That is one time," Martin said, to no one in particular, to the entire room, to the universe. "That was one specific winter,that is not a fair representative sample of myβ"
Nobody was listening. The person with too many needles had abandoned her knitting entirely to conduct the room like an orchestra, and Namjoon's booming baritone came in over the top of everyone else's,
Oh, his teeth are crooked as a fence line, oh, his hair's a rooster's crest, and the last time that he tried to smolder a fisherman's wife laughed so hard she fell in the river and had to be fished out herself β
which was, you gathered, not even remotely true and possibly the single funniest thing anyone had said all evening, judging by the way Martin's whole face went scarlet and the room dissolved into fresh, delighted chaos.
"That last one isn't even trueβ" Martin tried, over the singing, and got roundly ignored, and you watched, absolutely delighted, from your seat on an overturned barrel, as an entire room of strangers dismantled him verse by gleeful verse, and did not, notably, join inβnot because you weren't tempted, but because you found it far funnier to simply watch his face while it happened, the specific, put-upon suffering of a man who could not decide whether to laugh or storm out and kept landing, over and over, on some helpless combination of both.
There was something underneath the teasing, too, that you only half caughtβa warmth in it, the particular rough affection of people who'd known someone a long time and had earned the right to be cruel to him in a way that was really just another word for fond.
Namjoon clapped Martin on the shoulder hard enough to stagger him mid-verse and called him boy in a voice gone suddenly soft under all the noise.
You found yourself wondering, not for the first time that night, exactly how long ago it had been that a much younger Martin Edwards had first shown up in a place like this with nowhere else to go, and exactly what had happened to him before that, that a room full of thieves and degenerates had ended up feeling, to him, like the closest thing to family he had.
You filed the thought away to ask about later. You had a feeling it wasn't a question he'd answer easily, or sober, or with an audience.
"You're not even going to defend me," he said to you, mid-chorus, over the noise.
"I'm having a wonderful time."
"That is betrayal, that's what that isβ"
"They're not even wrong about the teeth thing."
"They are entirely wrong about the teeth thing, my teeth are fineβ"
Somewhere around the fourth verse, the man with the hairpinβwhose name, you'd gathered, was something like Namjoon, though it was hard to be sure over the singingβleaned across the table toward you with the particular intensity of someone who had decided you were the most interesting thing in the room.
"You," he pointed. "You have good energy. You've never danced on a table before, have you?"
"I've never been in a room before," you said, honestly, which seemed to delight him even further.
"Well," he said, standing, extending a huge, hairpin-carving hand toward you with genuine ceremony, "there's a first time."
You should have said no. You thought, distantly, of Mother's voice, of every warning about the danger and filth of the outside world, and then you thought about how good it had felt, hours ago, to have your bare feet in a river for the first time in your life, and you took the enormous man's hand and let him haul you, laughing, up onto the low wooden table.
It turned out you were, against every expectation, a genuinely excellent dancerβeighteen years of solitary practice in a round tower room had to be good for somethingβand the room roared its approval as you spun, skirts of your hanbok flaring out around your ankles, hair flowing, laughing so hard your ribs ached.
Martin stood below the table with an expression that had stopped being annoyed several minutes ago and had settled into something else entirely, something he was clearly trying very hard not to let show on his face and failing at almost completely.
The twins abandoned all pretense of arm-wrestling entirely to bang out a rhythm on the tabletop with the flats of their hands, and the man with the weasel produced, from some hidden pocket, a small reed flute he turned out to play with startling skill, weaving a quick, bright melody underneath the room's continued heckling of Martin, who had by now given up defending his teeth entirely and switched to a full, aggrieved commentary on the general injustice of his evening.
"This is not what I agreed to when I climbed through that window," he called up at you, though he was smiling despite himself, that same helpless, undone expression creeping further across his face with every spin you took. "I signed up for hiding. Quietly. In a tower. Notβthis. Not a full musical indictment of my character followed by you personally providing the evening's entertainment."
"You're welcome to join me," you called back, breathless, delighted, and watched with enormous satisfaction as his face went briefly, thoroughly panicked.
"Absolutely not."
"Coward."
"Strategist. There's a meaningful difference between the twoβ"
Namjoon, still clapping along from below, tipped his head back and roared with laughter loud enough to rattle the paper windows, and even Kono, perched safely on a high shelf out of the way of the chaos, seemed to have relaxed enough to bob his small head faintly along with the flute's rhythm, which you filed away as further evidence, alongside the nose-attack yet to come, that his feelings about Martin were considerably more complicated than his usual sniffing disdain let on.
It was, of course, at that exact momentβyou spinning, laughing, glowing in the lanternlight, framed perfectly in the hanok's single paper windowβthat the door burst open.
Mother stood in the frame, still dressed for travel, face utterly, terribly still, and every single sound in the room died at once.
You would replay the next thirty seconds for years afterward and never fully be able to piece together the order they happened in.
Mother's eyes found yours across the room and something in them cracked openβnot relief, you understood, even in the moment, even through the roaring in your ears. Not relief. Fury, dressed up as fear, the way it always was.
"You," Mother said, and her voice, even pitched low, even across a room gone suddenly silent, carried the way it always had, carved out of something colder than the room's actual temperature. She didn't shout. She never shouted; shouting would have meant losing something, and Mother did not lose things, she simply took them back. "Get down from there. Now."
You didn't move. You were aware, distantly, of how strange it wasβthat a woman who had raised you for eighteen years, whose voice had shaped nearly every rule you'd ever lived by, could stand in a doorway and still make your whole body want to obey before your mind had caught up to deciding whether it should.
"I was justβ"
"I don't care what you were just. Look at you. Look at what he's done to you already." Mother's eyes flicked, briefly, murderously, to Martin, standing frozen below the table. "This is exactly what I warned you about. Exactly. One night outside that tower and already you'reβ" she gestured, sharp and contemptuous, at the whole scene, the hanok, the strangers, your loosened hair, "β this."
"This is the most fun I've had in my entire life," you said, and heard your own voice shake only slightly.
Something in Mother's face did something complicatedβnot softened, not exactly, but shifted, the fury underneath it briefly, dangerously exposed. "That tower kept you safe."
"That tower kept me contained."
"There she is," said someoneβone of the guards behind Mother, you realized, a whole detail of them, come looking for the man on the wanted poster and finding, instead, considerably more than they'd bargained for.
The room dissolved into chaos.
Later, you would understand that half the hanok's patrons had their own reasons to want no part of a run-in with royal guards, and so what happened next was less an act of loyalty to you or Martin specifically and more a matter of shared, practical self-interestβbut in the moment it felt like nothing short of a miracle.
The mountain of a man with the hairpin suddenly hauling a table sideways to block the door, the twins scattering rice wine across the floor to send the first guard through it skidding, the person with too many needles somehow managing to tangle an entire coil of yarn around someone's ankles.
"Move, moveβ" Martin had you by the wrist, hauling you off the table and through a low doorway at the back of the hanok you hadn't even noticed, past a stack of firewood that Namjoon shoved aside with one huge hand to reveal a narrow black gap in the wall, barely wide enough for the two of you, sloping down into the dark.
"In, go, goβ" and then you were falling, more than climbing, into a tunnel that smelled of packed earth and old stone, Martin's hand fused to your wrist. Kono was a frantic weight against your collarbone, the sound of shouting and splintering wood fading fast above you as the two of you half-ran, half-stumbled through absolute blackness.
The tunnel was narrower than it had looked from the mouth of itβlow enough in places that Martin had to duck, cursing under his breath every time his shoulder caught stone, and twice the passage forked without warning, no light to guide the choice, nothing but Martin's hand tightening around yours and a muttered "left, I think, leftβ" that you had no way of verifying and every reason to simply trust.
Somewhere behind you, muffled through packed earth, you heard the unmistakable scrape of the firewood being shoved aside a second time, and a voiceβnot Mother's, one of the guards, sharp and close in a way that made your stomach dropβcalling that they'd found the passage.
"Faster," Martin breathed, and you didn't need telling twice, your bare palm scraping stone as you half-felt your way forward, heart slamming so hard you could feel it in your throat. The darkness pressed close enough on every side that for one disorienting stretch you lost all sense of which way was even forward anymore, trusting nothing but the grip of his hand and the sound of his breathing just ahead of you.
A light bobbed somewhere behindβtorchlight, catching the tunnel wall in a brief orange smear before you rounded another bend and lost it againβand you thought, with a clarity that cut cleanly through the panic, they're going to catch us, and then, right on its heels, absurdly, I don't even care, this is the most alive I have ever felt in my entire life.
You should have been terrified.
Some distant, sensible part of you understood that you were, technically, terrifiedβMother's face, the guards, the very real danger of the last thirty secondsβand yet underneath the fear was something so bright and enormous it eclipsed nearly everything else, something that had been building all day, all evening, every single moment since your feet first touched river water, and it broke open now in the pitch dark of that tunnel as something you could only describe as pure, uncut joy.
You were laughing. You realized it somewhere in the second minute of running, blind, hand in hand with a wanted thief, chased by your own mother's guards, and you were laughing so hard you could barely breathe, and Martinβsomewhere ahead of you in the dark, breathless himselfβstarted laughing too, and the two of you burst out of the far end of the tunnel into open moonlit air still half-doubled over, gasping, giddy, alive in a way you didn't have words for yet.
You collapsed against a fallen log at the tunnel's mouth, chest heaving, hair a wild mess around your shoulders, and looked up at the starsβmore of them than you'd ever seen from your tower window, spilled out edge to edge across the whole enormous skyβand thought, with a clarity that startled you: this. This is what I wanted.
"You," Martin said, still catching his breath beside you, staring at you like he was seeing something for the first time, "are a genuinely terrifying person."
"I danced on a table."
"You incited a riot."
"I think that was mostly you."
"No, that wasβokay, that was a little me, but youβ" he gestured at you, helplessly, at your wrecked hair and your flushed face and the grin you couldn't have wiped off if you tried, "βyou're supposed to be the sheltered one. The tower girl. And instead you're out here dancing on tables and outrunning royal guards on your first day of freedom like you were made for it."
"Maybe I was."
Something shifted in his face when you said thatβquick, unguarded, gone almost before you could catch itβand for a second neither of you said anything at all, just sat there in the moonlight with your shoulders nearly touching, breathing hard, the tunnel's dark mouth still gaping open behind you.
"Princess," he said, quieter now, no teasing in it at all.
"That's not my name."
"I know." He was still looking at you. "Doesn't mean it's not true."
You let the silence sit for a moment, the two of you still catching your breath, the tunnel's dark mouth gaping open behind you like something that had swallowed the version of yourself who'd walked into that hanok an hour ago and spat out someone slightly different.
"Can I ask you something," you said, eventually.
"You're going to anyway."
"That man. Namjoon. He called you boy like he'd known you a long time."
Something in Martin's face shuttered, just slightly, the easy grin dimming a few degrees without fully disappearing. "Long time's a strong way to put it."
"How long?"
He was quiet long enough that you thought he wasn't going to answer at all, picking at a loose thread on his sleeve with more focus than the thread deserved.
"I grew up in an orphanage," he said finally, not looking at you. "Not a nice one. The kind that stops feeding you the second you're old enough to feed yourself, more or less. I left when I was about twelve, lived rough for a while, and that placeβthat hanok, all those people you just watched sing an entire ballad about my teethβthat was the first place that ever fed me without asking anything back the first time I walked in half-starved and half my current size. So. Long time. Longer than I usually admit to strangers who hit me with singing bowls."
"I'm not a stranger anymore."
"No," he agreed, glancing at you sideways, something almost surprised in it, like he was only just now noticing that fact himself. "I suppose you're not."
"Is that why you steal things? Because nobody ever gave you anything, so you decided to just take it instead?"
"That's very poetic. Did you rehearse that."
"I'm asking a real question."
He exhaled, long, and looked back up at the stars instead of at you. "Something like that, probably. I used to tell myself it was about the money. One good score, enough to disappear somewhere nobody's ever heard the name Martin Edwards, buy myself an island, live like a king who answers to nobody."
He shrugged, and the shrug didn't quite land the way he probably wanted it to. "Lately I've started to suspect it was never really about the money at all. Might've just been about proving I could have something. Anything. That nobody could take away from me the way everything got taken when I was a kid."
You didn't say anything right away. You thought about eighteen years in a round tower, about a woman who called your safety love and meant, underneath it, control, about how you'd never once had anything that was fully, unquestionably yours eitherβnot your name, not your time, not even, until tonight, your own two feet standing wherever they wanted to stand.
"I think," you said slowly, "we might have more in common than you'd expect from a lost girl and a thief."
"You admit it, then. Princess."
"I admit nothing. I'm making an observation about orphaned longing, don't twist it into something else."
He laughed at thatβa real laugh, surprised out of himβand some of the tightness went out of his shoulders. "Orphaned longing. You really did rehearse that."
"I did not."
"You absolutely did, you've been sitting on that phrase since the tunnel."
"I have never sat on a phrase in my life," you said, with as much dignity as you could manage, and he laughed again, and the two of you sat there a while longer in the moonlight, not saying much else, letting the quiet settle into something that felt less like the awkward silence of strangers and more like the comfortable kind that came, usually, from people who'd known each other a great deal longer than one very strange day.
The next two days passed the way you imagined a fever mightβbright and disorienting and slightly unreal, every hour crowded with more new things than you'd experienced in the previous eighteen years combined.
You learned that Martin snored, faintly, when he slept sitting up against a tree, and that Woojoo had apparently made it his personal mission to step on his boots at every possible opportunity for the rest of what you assumed would be their entire acquaintance.
You learned that Kono had strong opinions about which berries were safe to eat and communicated them via a truly impressive range of disapproving noises. You learned the names of three separate mountain ranges, none of which matched the ones you'd painted from imagination, and foundβto your surpriseβthat you liked the real ones better.
You found a stream on the first afternoon, cold and clear and shallow enough to wade into without fear, and spent nearly an hour there simply standing in it, letting the current pull at the hem of your hanbok, while Martin sat on the bank pretending not to watch you and failing at it almost entirely.
When you splashed himβdeliberately, gleefully, without an ounce of remorseβhe retaliated with such wounded overcommitment that the two of you ended up soaked through within minutes, both of you laughing too hard to properly aim, Kono shrieking indignantly from a dry rock where he'd wisely relocated at the first sign of hostilities, and Woojoo watching the entire spectacle from the treeline with what you could only describe as profound equine disappointment in both of you.
You learned, too, in quieter moments, the shape of things Martin didn't say out loud.
The way he went very still and unusually gentle whenever you flinched at a loud noise, some old tower-bred instinct you hadn't fully shaken; the way he always, without seeming to think about it, put himself slightly between you and the road whenever another traveler passed.
The way he never once, not even once, asked why a girl who'd apparently never left a tower before knew so much about anatomy or herbs or the exact temperature at which honey turned to poison in the wrong hands, information you'd absorbed purely from Mother's paranoid insistence on preparing you for dangers that had never once, until this week, actually arrived.
You also learned, gradually, and against your own better judgment, that you liked Martin Edwards considerably more than you'd planned to.
He tried the smolder on the second evening, apropos of nothing, while you were both crouched by a small campfire waiting for a rabbit he'd insisted, with wild overconfidence, that he knew how to properly cook.
You caught him doing it out of the corner of your eye firstβa slow, deliberate turn of his head toward you, chin dropping slightly, eyes going half-lidded and soft in a way that was clearly meant to be devastating, one eyebrow lifting with the practiced precision of a man who had, you suspected, spent real time perfecting this exact expression in the reflection of still water.
You stared at him.
He held the look.
You kept staring.
He held it a little longer, jaw set, the corner of his mouth doing something you assumed was supposed to read as rakish,and you watched, fascinated, as the muscles around his eye began, very slightly, to twitch with the effort of maintaining it.
"What are you doing," you said finally.
The smolder collapsed instantly, entirely, like a tent losing its center pole. "Nothing."
"You were doing something with your face."
"I was not doing anything with my face, that's just my face, that's how my face looksβ"
"Your face looked like you were having some kind of episode."
"That," Martin said, with wounded dignity, turning very deliberately back to the fire, "is called charisma, and it has worked on every singleβyou know what, never mind. Forget it. Rabbit's probably done."
"Try it again."
He looked at you, suspicious. "Why."
"I want to see if it's worse the second time or if that was just a fluke."
"It is not going to be worse, it is going to be exactly as devastating as the first time, I simply chose not to fully commit to it because I was distracted by the rabbitβ"
"Prove it."
He set his jaw, visibly gathering himself, and tried againβchin dropping, eyes half-lidding, that same eyebrow rising with what was clearly meant to be effortless, smoldering confidenceβand made it a full three seconds before a piece of ash popped from the fire close enough to his knee that he flinched, hard, breaking the whole expression apart into a startled yelp that had absolutely nothing rakish about it whatsoever.
You laughed so hard you had to set down the stick you'd been roasting your portion of rabbit on, doubling over, and Martin sat there looking deeply, personally betrayed by an ember.
"That doesn't count," he said, with the flat, aggrieved certainty of a man who knew perfectly well that it counted completely. "That was an unrelated incident. The face itself was flawless right up until the interruption."
"I've genuinely never seen anything less flawless in my life."
"You've been alive for four days outside a tower, your knowledge is extremely limitedβ"
"I've seen Woojoo make a more convincing case for himself."
"Now you're just being cruel."
"I'm being honest," you said, wiping at your eyes, and he huffed, and threw a small twig at you that you batted easily out of the air, and the two of you settled back into an easy quiet, the fire popping softly between you, Woojoo a dark, watchful shape at the edge of the clearing, apparently satisfied enough with the evening's proceedings to have stopped glaring, for once.
The rabbit was not, in fact, done, nor would it ever really achieve a state you could confidently call cooked, and you ate it anyway, sitting close enough to the fire that your shoulders kept brushing, and somewhere in the space of that mealβburnt, underdone, genuinely one of the worst things you'd ever eaten and yet somehow, impossibly, one of your favorite meals of your entire lifeβyou caught yourself watching the firelight move across his face and thinking, with a lurch you weren't at all prepared for, oh. Oh, no.
Kono, curled in your lap, looked up at you with an expression you were beginning to read with alarming fluency, and it said, quite clearly: I saw that. We are going to discuss this later.
"Shut up," you told him, out loud, and Martin glanced over.
"I didn't say anything."
"Not you." You nodded down at Kono, who flicked his tail smugly. "Him."
"That thing has never liked me."
"He doesn't like anyone."
"He likes you."
"I raised him from an egg, that's different."
"Sure." Martin was smiling now, small and real, none of the practiced charm from earlier, just something quieter underneath it. "He's very protective. It's actually a little sweet. In aβweirdly feral, judgmental sort of way."
"Don't call my dragon feral."
"I would never," he said, entirely unconvincingly, and you laughed, and Kono made a noise of deep personal offense, and somewhere above you the first stars were coming out over a sky that would, tomorrow night, on the night of your birthday, fill entirely with gold.
The village you passed through the next morning was small and half-asleep, a scatter of tile-roofed houses along a single dusty road, a well at the center where two old women stood gossiping over their buckets, a market just beginning to set up its stalls in the cool early lightβand you stood at the edge of it for a long moment, just looking, before Martin had to physically steer you forward by the shoulder.
"You're doing the thing again."
"I've never seen a market before."
"You've never seen anything before, that's becoming a running theme of this trip." But he said it gently, none of his usual bite in it, and let you drift from stall to stall at your own paceβa woman selling dried persimmons strung on twine, a man with a cart of polished wooden combs, a girl not much younger than you hawking little clay bells that chimed high and sweet when you touched them.
You bought nothing, because you had no money, a fact that seemed to strike Martin as personally intolerable the moment he noticed you eyeing a small painted fan for the third time.
"Here," he said, and before you could stop him he'd produced a string of coins from somewhere inside his jacketβyou didn't ask where, and strongly suspected you didn't want to knowβand pressed them into the fan-seller's hand with the easy, practiced charm of a man who did this sort of thing often, emerging a moment later to hand you the fan with a small, exaggerated bow. "For the gongju."
"You don't have to do that."
"I know I don't have to. I'm choosing to. There's a difference, I keep telling you this."
You turned the fan over in your handsβpainted with a scene of cranes over a lake, delicate, nothing like the practical, sturdy things Mother had ever allowed youβand felt something in your chest go warm and a little overwhelmed, the specific ache of being given something small and unnecessary and entirely, purely kind.
"Thank you," you said, and meant it more than the words could really carry.
"Don't get used to it," Martin said, though his ears had gone faintly pink again, the way they did whenever you caught him being sincere. "I have a reputation to maintain. Ruthless. Self-interested. Very hard to impress."
"You just bought a stranger a fan."
"I bought you a fan, that's different, you're notβ" he seemed to catch himself, some thought crossing his face he clearly hadn't meant to say out loud, and cleared his throat instead. "Anyway. We should keep moving. Overlook's still a few hours off, and I'd like to actually get you there with enough daylight to see the view properly."
You let him change the subject, mostly because you weren't sure you were ready either to examine what he'd almost said, but you tucked the fan carefully into your sleeve, next to Kono, who eyed it with mild suspicion before apparently deciding it posed no threat to his position and settling back down.
The two of you left the village with Woojoo laden down, somewhat improbably, with a small sack of persimmons Martin had also boughtβ"for the horse," he'd said, unconvincingly, though you both knew perfectly well who was going to end up eating most of themβand walked the rest of the morning in an easy, comfortable quiet, broken only occasionally by Martin pointing out landmarks, or you asking questions about the world that he answered, more and more, without any of the teasing he'd led with the day before.
"Can I ask you something," you said, somewhere around midday, watching the road unspool ahead of you toward hills that were, slowly, beginning to look less like mountains and more like the gentler rise of land near a coast.
"You keep asking me that like I have a choice."
"Why haven't you left? You could've, a dozen times by now. You've got your satchel, you've got a truce with Woojoo, you could've slipped off in the night and I'd never have caught you."
He was quiet for a moment, watching the road rather than you. "I've thought about it."
"And?"
"And I keep not doing it," he said, simply, like the answer surprised him as much as it seemed to surprise you. "Which is new. Historically I'm very good at leaving. It's sort of my whole thing. Get in, get what I need, get out before anyone gets attached, especially me." He glanced sideways at you, something wry and a little helpless in it. "You're making that considerably more difficult than usual, gongju."
You didn't have a response for thatβnot one you trusted yourself to say out loud, anywayβso you reached over instead and took his hand, the way you had at the tunnel's mouth, easy and instinctive, and he let you, lacing his fingers through yours without missing a step, and the two of you walked the rest of the afternoon that way, hands linked, saying nothing else about it at all.
You reached the overlook above the harbor just as the sun was beginning its long slide toward the water, the whole kingdom spread out below you in a way you'd only ever seen painted, and painted badly, from your own imaginationβthe palace roofs catching the last light, the sea beyond the harbor gone molten copper, boats coming in for evening with their sails full and orange.
"There it is," Martin said, quieter than you'd heard him yet, standing close beside you at the edge of the outlook. "Home of your mysterious lantern people."
You didn't answer right away. You were looking at the palaceβthe actual palace, not the vague shape you'd always imagined from your tower window, but real, close enough now to make out individual roof tiles, individual windows catching fire in the sunsetβand something in your chest was doing something you didn't entirely have language for. A pull. An ache, low and old, like a bruise you hadn't known was there until someone pressed it.
"You okay?" Martin asked.
"I don't know," you said, honestly. "It feels likeβ" you struggled for it, and gave up trying to find the exact shape of the feeling, settling instead for the closest true thing you had. "It feels like coming home to a place I've never been."
He was quiet for a moment, watching you rather than the view.
"In all honesty," he said, "I think you're going to like it there. Whatever it turns out to be, wherever it turns out you're from. I think the whole world's better with you loose in it, gongju. Bowl and all."
You looked at him with the last of the sunset gold across his face, that ridiculous, sincere, unguarded expression he clearly hadn't meant to let you seeβand you thought about tunnels and rivers and burnt rabbit and a hanok full of strangers singing about his teeth, and you thought, with the same clarity you'd had at the mouth of that tunnel two nights ago: this. I want this. Whatever this is turning into, I want it.
"Come on," you said instead, because you weren't brave enough yet to say the other thing, and reached for his hand, lacing your fingers through his like it was the easiest, most obvious motion in the world. "There's a boat down there with our name on it. I have a light show to see."
Below you, the first lanterns of the evening were already beginning to lift off the water, small and gold and multiplying, rising slow and steady into a sky gone the deep, glowing blue of early darkβand somewhere out past the harbor, thousands more were waiting to join them, waiting, though you didn't know it yet, for you.
Martin's hand tightened around yours.
"After you, princess," he said, and the two of you started down the hill together, toward the water, toward the light.
The boat Martin foundβborrowed, he insisted, with a straight face that fooled absolutely no one, from a dock crowded with a dozen identical little wooden craft, all of them clearly rented out for exactly this evening, exactly this purposeβwas small and low and smelled faintly of fish, and rocked alarmingly when you first climbed in, enough that you grabbed for his arm and he grabbed for the side of the boat and Kono, riding in your collar, made a noise of profound and specific betrayal at being jostled.
"Careful," Martin said, steadying you with a hand at your waist that lingered maybe half a second longer than strictly necessary, and you were fairly sure, from the way his ears had gone slightly pink, that he'd noticed it too.
Woojoo, denied entry to the boat on account of being an entire horse, watched the proceedings from the dock with an expression of deep personal injury, and had to be bribed with the promise of an extra ration of feed before he'd agree to wait, tail swishing, ears pinned, radiating the specific fury of a creature left behind on the one night that mattered.
"He'll forgive you eventually," you said, as Martin pushed off from the dock with a long oar, the little boat gliding out onto water gone glassy and still with the coming dark.
"He has never forgiven me for anything in his entire life. I stole an apple from his feed bag once, two years ago, and I am fairly sure he still brings it up in whatever passes for a horse's internal monologue."
"Poetic justice."
"You're supposed to be on my side."
"I'm on Kono's side. And apparently Woojoo's. You seem to have accumulated a great many enemies for one man."
"They're not enemies," Martin said, settling the oar and letting the boat drift, "they'reβcreatures with very high standards who happen to have chosen me as their personal project. It's a compliment, really, if you think about it correctly."
"I don't think that's what a compliment is."
"You'll come around."
The kingdom had gone properly dark behind you now, the palace a black shape against a sky just beginning to prickle with stars, and the harbor water held every scattered lantern-light in perfect, trembling reflection, so that it felt, floating there, like you were suspended between two skiesβone above, one below, and you in the exact still center of both.
"It's almost time," you said, quiet, watching the palace. Something in your chest had gone tight and expectant, the same old ache from the overlook, except closer now, close enough that you thought you might be able to name it if you sat with it a little longer.
Martin didn't say anything. He'd gone still too, watching you rather than the palace, in a way you were becoming increasingly, helplessly aware of.
And then the first note soundedβa low horn, from somewhere within the palace walls, carrying clean and mournful across the waterβand the sky above the towers began, all at once, to fill with gold.
all those days, watching from the windows
You had watched this exact sight, every year of your life, from a single round window a mile up a mountainside, small and distant and never once close enough to feel the heat of the paper or hear the soft rush of a thousand wicks catching flame at once. You had painted it, badly, from memory, over and over, never quite able to get the specific quality of the light right, the way it wasn't quite gold and wasn't quite orange but some living color in between, restless, warm, endlessly multiplying.
Nothing you had ever painted came close.
now i'm here, blinking in the starlight
now i'm here, suddenly i see
standing here
The lanterns rose in waves, not all at once but in long, cascading pulsesβa hundred, then another hundred, then more than you could count, drifting up from courtyards and rooftops and the decks of boats all across the harbor, joining together into a slow, vast river of light climbing the dark sky. The water around your little boat filled with their reflections until it was impossible to say, looking down, where the true lanterns ended and the false ones beganβgold above you, gold below you, and you sitting in the very middle of it with your breath caught somewhere behind your ribs.
"Oh," you said, which was not remotely adequate to the size of what you were feeling, but was all you had.
"Yeah," Martin said, softly, and when you looked over at him he wasn't watching the lanterns at all. He was watching you, your face lit gold and trembling with reflected light, your eyes wide and wet in a way you hadn't quite noticed until you felt the first tear slip free and had to laugh, embarrassed, wiping at it with the back of your wrist.
"I've waited my whole life for this."
"I know."
"I didn't even know what I was waiting for. I just knew that every year, this light showed up in the sky, and something in me hurt, every time, and I never understood why, and now I'm sitting here and I still don't fully understand why except that it feels likeβ" you struggled for it again, the same struggle as the overlook, except this time you didn't let yourself give up on finding the words.
and the world has somehow shifted.
"It feels like they were waiting for someone. And some enormous, stupid, hopeful part of me has always believed, without any evidence at all, that the someone was me."
Martin was quiet for a long moment, and when you glanced at him his expression had gone soft and unguarded in a way you'd only caught glimpses of beforeβat the campfire, at the mouth of the tunnel, never allowed to sit still on his face long enough for you to really look at it.
"For what it's worth," he said, "I think it probably was."
all at once, everything looks different... now that i see you.
Reaching into his satchel, he drew out two lanternsβsmall, folded flat, clearly purchased at some point during the walk down from the overlook, though you hadn't noticed him buying them, too absorbed in the viewβand passed one across to you, along with a little punk of glowing incense to light the wick.
"I got us our own," he said, almost shy about it, which did not suit him at all and which you found, helplessly, endearing anyway. "Figured you shouldn't have to just watch other people's."
Your hands weren't quite steady as you unfolded the paper frame and touched the flame to the wick, the lantern blooming gold between your palms, warm and alive, straining gently upward the way they all did, wanting badly to join the great river of light rising above you.
"Make a wish," Martin said. "Isn't that the tradition? Birthday girl gets a wish."
You looked at him, sharp. "I never told you it was my birthday."
He had the grace, at least, to look faintly caught out. "You didn't have to. Lost princess, mysterious lantern obsession, refuses to give her real name, gets misty over a light show that happens on one specific night of the yearβI put it together somewhere around the singing-bowl incident, honestly."
"You've known this whole time."
"I've suspected this whole time. There's a difference. I was being polite about it."
"You've been calling me gongju for two days as a joke."
"I've been calling you gongju for two days because I was fairly confident, and also because it made you make that specific face you're making right now, which I happen to enjoy a great deal." He nodded down at the lantern cupped in your hands, steering neatly away from the moment before you could examine it too closely. "Make your wish, princess. Before it burns your fingers."
You held the lantern a moment longer, warm light spilling up between your hands onto your face, and thoughtβnot about the kingdom below, not even about the parents you didn't yet know you had, waiting somewhere in that dark palace with a hope they'd never once let themselves fully abandon. But about the man sitting across from you in a stolen boat, teeth genuinely, infuriatingly perfect, watching you like you were the only light on the entire water worth looking at.
You didn't say the wish out loud. But you let it go anyway, watched it rise and catch the current of wind that carried it up to join the thousands of others, and when you looked back down, Martin was still watching you, close enough now that you could count, if you'd wanted to, every one of his eyelashes.
"Your turn," you said, a little breathless.
He lit his own lantern, let it rise, and didn't look away from you while he did itβno smolder this time, none of the careful, practiced charm from the campfire that had made you laugh at him. Just him, looking at you, plain and raw and slightly disbelieving of his own luck Like a man who'd broken into a random tower to hide from two very angry brothers and found, instead of an empty room, the entire rest of his life.
"I'm not going to tell you what I wished for," he said, "but I will say it involves considerably less running from armed men than my last several wishes."
"That's a low bar."
"I'm a man of variety."
You laughedβyou couldn't help it, the sound coming out watery and warmβand somewhere in the laugh, without either of you quite deciding to, the space between you closed, his hand finding yours again in the bottom of the boat, and you found yourself leaning in, slow, the way the whole evening had been slow and inevitable since the moment he tumbled through your window, and he leaned in too, and for one full suspended second, gold light drifting down all around you like something out of a legend, you thoughtβthis. This is the thing I've been aching for every single year I watched it from too far away.
Kono chose that exact moment to launch himself, with great personal indignation, off your shoulder and directly onto the bridge of Martin's nose.
"Owβ" Martin reeled back, more startled than hurt, batting uselessly at the small dragon now clinging to his face with all four clawed feet and radiating profound betrayal. "Your dragon justβhe attacked me, did you see that, he full-onβ"
"He's protective," you said, laughing so hard you had to hold the sides of the boat to keep from tipping, tears mixing with the ones already on your face, watching Kono glare down at Martin from the very tip of his nose like a small, furious guardian spirit who had absolutely no intention of allowing anything interesting to happen without express supervision.
"He is feral, is what he isβ"
"He likes you," you said, wiping your eyes, still laughing. "This is how he shows it. Trust me. If he actually hated you, you'd know."
"This does not feel like liking, this feels like an assassination attemptβ"
Kono flicked his tail, unbothered, and settled himself with great satisfaction directly between the two of you on the boat's narrow bench, clearly intending to remain there for the foreseeable future, a small, smug, iridescent chaperone against a sky still falling gold, lantern light rippling gently across the water in every direction, thousands of tiny floating wishes drifting home at last to a girl who'd spent eighteen years wondering, in the quiet dark of a tower window, whether anyone out there was waiting for her.
They had been. All along. And now, impossibly, so was he.
You looked at Martin over the top of Kono's indignant, iridescent head, both of you still laughing, both of you still close enough to feel the warmth radiating off each other in the cooling night air, and you thought that whatever happened next. Whatever the palace held, whatever answers waited for you at the bottom of that harbor, whatever Mother would do when she finally caught up to you, because you had no illusions that she wouldn'tβthis part, right here, the boat and the gold light and the ridiculous, wounded dragon and the ridiculous, wonderful man across from you, was a part you were never, ever going to forget.
"Happy birthday, gongju," Martin said, quiet, over the top of a still-hissing Kono, and you thought, looking at him, that for the first time in your entire life, you actually believed it.
Laterβmuch later, after the last of the lanterns had burned low and drifted, spent, back down toward the water, after Woojoo had forgiven you both just enough to let Martin scratch behind his ears without incident, after Kono had finally abandoned his post between you to curl up, smug and victorious, in the fold of your sleeveβyou rowed the little boat back toward shore in a silence that wasn't empty at all. It was full instead of everything neither of you had quite said yet, the two of you sitting close enough that your knees kept knocking together with every small motion of the water.
You didn't know yet what waited for you at the top of that hillβwhat the palace would say when a girl with hair like sunlight walked through its gates for the first time in eighteen years, what Mother would do when she finally caught up to the two of you, what it would cost, in the end, to keep any of this. You only knew that you didn't want the night to be over, that some small, stubborn, hopeful part of you had already decided, somewhere between the singing bowl and the lantern light, that whatever came next, you wanted to face it with your hand in his.
"What happens now?" you asked, quiet, as the shore came slowly closer, torchlight from the docks beginning to flicker gold across the water to meet you.
Martin was quiet for a moment, considering the question with more weight than his usual answers ever carried.
"I don't know," he admitted, finally. "I've never actually planned past the running-away part before. Usually there isn't a now. There's just the next place to be, and the next, and I never stick around long enough to find out what comes after."
"And this time?"
He looked at you, truly and deeply gazed. It was the way he had at the overlook, at the tunnel's mouth, at every unguarded moment he'd let slip through the cracks of his own careful charm over the past four daysβand something in his face settled, like a decision he'd already made without quite admitting it to himself.
"This time," he hummed, "I think I'd like to find out."
The boat bumped gently against the dock, and somewhere above you, one last, late lantern rose alone into the dark, gold and small and stubborn, chasing after all the others that had gone before itβand you thought, watching it go, that it looked exactly like hope.
Morning came in gray and soft, mist lying low over the harbor the way it did most mornings this close to the water, and you woke tucked against the base of a fishing boat with Kono curled warm against your throat and Martin already awake beside you, satchel across his shoulder, watching the fog with an expression you didn't much care for.
"You're making a weird face," you said, sitting up, voice still thick with sleep. "This like... stiff, deciding-something face."
"I don't have a stiff, deciding-something face."
"You absolutely do. You had it right before you climbed through my window and you have it right now."
He exhaled, and some of the careful blankness dropped away, replaced by something more honestβnervous, almost, in a way that didn't suit him nearly as well as the sarcasm usually did. "I want to do this properly. Whatever this is turning into." He nodded down at the satchel, at the unmistakable shape of the crown inside it. "I know people who'll take this off my hands for real money, enough that neither of us has to run from anything ever again. I want to trade it, clean, and come back for you, and thenβI don't know. Figure out the rest. Together, if you'll have me."
"You could just give it back."
"I could," he agreed, "and normally I'd have laughed you out of the harbor for suggesting it. But I'm finding, lately, that a lot of things that used to make sense don't anymore, and a lot of things I never used to consider are starting to sound like exactly what I want." He reached out, tucked a loose strand of hair back from your face, unbearably gentle about it. "Wait for me here. I won't be long."
"You'd better not be."
"Princess." He said it soft, like a promise rather than a joke, and pressed one quick, warm kiss to your forehead before you could think of anything clever enough to say back. "I'll be back before the fog burns off. I swear it."
You watched him go, satchel bouncing against his hip, Woojoo trailing reluctantly after him with the particular resigned loyalty of a creature who'd decided, against every instinct, to trust his rider one more timeβand you sat there on the damp dock with Kono in your lap, watching the mist swallow him up, and told yourself, firmly, that the ache in your chest was nothing. Just morning cold. Just nerves. Nothing at all like fear.
The fog thickened instead of burning off, and the longer you waited the worse the ache in your chest got, until you couldn't sit still any longer and started pacing the dock's edge, Kono clinging tight to your shoulder, both of you straining to hear anything at all beyond the slow slap of water against the pilings.
You heard voices first. They were low and harsh, more than one man, coming from somewhere off along the tree line past the last of the boatsβand against every ounce of good sense you had left, you went toward them instead of away.
You found the clearing just past the fog's thickest bank, and what you found there stopped your heart cold: Martin on his knees in the mud, satchel gone, two enormous men standing over himβone you'd recognize instantly from the way Martin had gone rigid at the mere mention of them days ago, though you'd never learned their names until this moment.
Sunghoon. Jay. Buff, scarred, furious, and entirely unbothered by the fact that Martin was bleeding from a split lip and still trying, uselessly, to talk his way out.
"You cut us out," Sunghoon was saying, low and dangerous. "Two years of work, and you cut us out for a girl."
"It wasn't like thatβ"
"Save it." Jay's boot connected with Martin's ribs, and you had to bite down hard on your own hand to keep from crying out. "We'll take the crown. And we'll take the reward for you too. Two birds."
And then, from somewhere behind them, a voice you knew better than your own heartbeat, cool and pleasant and utterly without mercy.
"Gentlemen," Mother said, stepping out of the mist like she'd been waiting there all along, "I believe I can make this considerably more profitable for everyone involved."
You didn't understand, in the moment, what you were watchingβonly that Mother produced a small purse of coin, that Sunghoon and Jay's fury seemed to shift, calculating, weighing a better offer, that Martin's face went from pained to something close to horrified the second he understood what was happening.
"Don't," he said, to Mother, voice raw. "Whatever you're planningβleave her out of it. She doesn't have to be part of this."
"She has always been part of this," Mother said, almost gently, crouching down to his level with the particular tenderness she'd once reserved, you realized with a sick lurch, entirely for you. "You simply made the mistake of thinking you'd earned a say in it."
You didn't see exactly what happened nextβa scuffle, Martin shouting your name once, sharp and desperate, before something struck him and the sound cut offβbecause Mother had already turned, unerringly, toward the tree line where you stood frozen, and her eyes found yours through the fog with a precision that told you she'd known exactly where you were the entire time.
"There you are," she said, soft, and something about the softness was so much worse than the fury from the hanok. "Come along, darling. I think it's well past time we had a talk."
You ran. You didn't get far.
By the time the fog burned off, you were sitting in the belly of a small, windowless room that smelled of salt and old ropeβnot the tower, you understood dimly, some hidden place along the coast Mother had clearly kept in reserve for exactly this kind of contingencyβwrists bound loosely, more out of formality than real restraint, because Mother had never needed rope to keep you where she wanted you. She'd only ever needed your own heart, turned carefully against itself.
"He left, you know," she said, arranging herself on the room's single stool with the composure of a woman discussing the weather. "The moment those men offered him a way out, he took it. The crown. The reward money for turning you in besides, I'd imagineβa tidy sum for very little effort." She sighed, and it might almost have sounded sympathetic, if you hadn't spent eighteen years learning exactly how much genuine feeling lived underneath that particular sigh. "I saw the ship myself. Sailing out with the morning tide. I'm so sorry, darling. I did try to warn you what the world was like."
"You're lying."
"Am I?" She tilted her head, and something flickered behind her eyesβnot doubt, never doubt, but the faint, familiar satisfaction of a woman watching a plan click neatly into place. "You've known him four days. I've kept you safe for eighteen years. Which of us, do you truly think, has earned your trust?"
You wanted, badly, to believe it was a lieβevery instinct in your chest screamed that it wasβand yet some old, deep, tower-shaped part of you, the part that had spent a lifetime being told the world was cruel and that Mother alone could be counted on, curled up small and aching and terribly, terribly willing to believe her anyway. That was the cruelest part of it. Not the lie itself, but how easily, after everything, it still found purchase.
"I want to go home," Mother said, standing, brushing invisible dust from her skirts. "Not the towerβsomewhere new, somewhere he'll never think to look, somewhere I can keep you properly this time. You'll thank me for it, eventually. You always do."
You didn't answer. You sat very still in the dim, salt-smelling dark, and thought about a boat full of lantern light, and a man who'd bought you a fan for no reason at all, and a dragon who'd bitten his nose out of pure, ridiculous devotionβand something in you, quiet but absolutely unshakeable, refused, even now, even with the doubt gnawing at your ribs, to fully believe the story Mother was selling.
Martin woke in a cell.
His head throbbed, his ribs ached with every breath, and it took him several long, disoriented minutes to piece together that the last thing he rememberedβMother's voice, your name torn out of his throat, the world going darkβhad apparently ended with him here, iron bars, straw floor, and a guard outside who addressed him, with unmistakable relish, by the exact reward figure printed on his wanted poster.
"They're saying you kidnapped a girl," the guard said, almost cheerful about it. "Some noble's daughter. Word is the hanging's set for sundown. Shame about the teeth, by the wayβheard the sketch was more flattering than the real thing."
"I did not kidnap anyone," Martin gritted, with the flat, exhausted fury of a man repeating himself for the fifth time, "and my teeth are fineβ" and then stopped, because none of that mattered even slightly next to the one thought currently eclipsing everything else in his skull: she thinks I left her.
He didn't remember much of what happened after thatβonly that somewhere past midnight, a small, furious, iridescent shape came skittering through the cell's single high window, having tracked him across half the coastline on nothing but sheer stubborn will. Not long after, the cell door groaned open from the outside to reveal Namjoon's enormous, grinning face, flanked by the twins, the man with the weasel, and, filling the corridor behind them with visible, righteous indignation, one extremely large, extremely unimpressed horse.
"Heard you got yourself in trouble," Namjoon said. "Figured we'd come see if the rumors about your teeth were the only thing worth breaking you out for."
"I could kiss every single one of you," Martin said, already moving.
"Please don't," said one of the twins, Juhoon. "We heard about the fisherman's wife."
He found you by the coast road at dusk, Mother's carriage rattling ahead through the last of the fading light, and there was no time for a plan, no time for anything except Woojoo breaking into a dead run with Martin bent low over his neck and Kono clinging, white-knuckled, to his collar, the whole ragged, impossible rescue party thundering after a carriage carrying away the only thing that had ever made the running feel like it was going somewhere.
He caught them at the cliff road, where the trees gave way to open sky and the sea spread out gray and endless below, and Mother, seeing him, didn't so much as flinch.
"Persistent," she said, stepping down from the carriage alone, something cold and final settling into her face. "I did wonder if you'd manage it."
"Let her go."
"She's not yours to demand things about." Mother's eyes flicked past him, to where you'd appeared in the carriage doorway. His wrists finally free, staring at Martin like you couldn't quite trust the sight of himβbruised, breathless, undeniably, impossibly there. "Tell him, darling. Tell him what you told me. That you understand now. That the world outside only ever takes."
"I told you I didn't believe you," you said, voice shaking but clear, stepping down onto the road. "I still don't."
Something in Mother's composure cracked, just slightly, just enough. "You would choose him. After everything I've given you. Everything I've sacrificed."
"You didn't give me anything," you said, and the words came out steadier than you felt, eighteen years of swallowed truth finally finding air. "You took me. There's a difference. I've only just learned it, but I've learned it completely."
What happened next happened fast, and badly, the way real danger always doesβMother lunging, a blade you hadn't seen catching the last of the light, Martin throwing himself between the two of you with no more thought than he'd given anything else reckless and right over the past four days, and then the sharp, terrible sound of metal finding flesh, and Martin going down hard onto the cliff road with blood already spreading dark across his side.
"Martinβ"
"I'm fine," he said, which was so obviously, catastrophically untrue that you didn't even bother arguing, dropping to your knees beside him, hands already pressing hard against the wound, some old instinct screaming at you to sing, sing the old words, the ones Mother used every time she needed the magic, and you opened your mouth to do exactly thatβ
"Don't," Martin said, gripping your wrist with what strength he had left, eyes finding yours through the pain with a clarity that cut straight through everything else. "If you do thatβif you use it nowβshe'll never let either of us go. Not really. Not ever. She'll just keep finding a reason to need you broken enough to fix."
"I can't just let youβ"
"You can," he said, "trust me, princess, pleaseβ" and reached, with the last of his strength, for the small blade at his own belt, the one he'd used to fillet fish and cut rope and once, memorably, threaten a very rude tax collector, and before you fully understood what he meant to do, he'd taken hold of your long braid and cut, clean through, several feet of gold-shot hair falling away into the dirt at once, severed for good.
The change was immediate and terrible. The cut length dulled from gold to something ordinary and plain even as it fell, and Motherβmid-motion, reaching for you, for the hair, for the magic she'd spent a hundred years stealingβmade a sound you would never, for the rest of your life, be able to fully forget.
Her hands went first, skin creasing and thinning before your eyes, decades collapsing into her all at once, unstoppable now that the last thread keeping her young had been severed for good.
She staggered back toward the cliff's edge, aged a hundred years in the space of ten seconds, and the wind off the sea did the rest, catching what was left of her and scattering it, gray and weightless, out over the water until there was nothing left standing on the road at all.
You didn't watch it finish. You were already turned back to Martin, hands shaking, pressing uselessly against a wound that wasn't healing, that had no reason left to heal, because the magic that could have done it lay scattered in cut hair and ash somewhere behind you.
"Hey," Martin said, voice going thin, "heyβdon't do that face, the face you're doingβ"
"Don't you dare," you said, furious and breaking all at once. "Don't you dare talk to me about faces right nowβ"
"I'd do it again," he said, eyes already starting to lose their focus, "every time, exactly the same, I just want you to know that, in case I don't get toβ"
"You're not finishing that sentence."
He smiled anyway, small and lopsided, teeth perfectly, infuriatingly straight even now, and his eyes slid shut.
You didn't remember deciding to cry. You only remembered the tears coming, hot and helpless, one falling from your cheek straight onto the wound at his sideβand the low, golden hum that followed, faint but unmistakable, the last living echo of magic that had never fully left you even with the hair gone, because it had never really lived in the hair at all. It had always been in you.
The wound closed. Color came back into his face all at once, like a held breath finally released, and his eyes opened, blinking up at you in dazed, disbelieving confusion.
"You're supposed to be dead," you told him, half laughing, half sobbing, hands still shaking as you cradled his face.
"Rude," he said, voice cracked but unmistakably, wonderfully himself, "extremely rude, waking a man up just to insult himβ"
You didn't let him finish that sentence.
You kissed him before you'd fully decided to, both hands still fisted in the collar of his shirt where you'd been holding him together only seconds before, and it wasn't gentle β you didn't have gentle left in you, not after watching the color drain out of his face, not after the terrible, endless second where you'd genuinely believed you were about to lose him on a cliff road with the sea crashing below and no way left to fix it. It was too much all at once, everything you hadn't let yourself say out loud over four impossible days crashing out through your mouth against his instead β the fear, still shaking through your hands where they'd found his jaw; the relief, hot and overwhelming, closing your throat; the something else underneath both of those that you'd been carefully not naming since the moment he tumbled through your window and hadn't stopped, apparently, not even once, not even now.
Martin made a low, startled sound against your mouth β surprise, mostly, and then something that wasn't surprise at all β and his hand came up to cradle the back of your head, careful even now, even freshly healed and half out of his mind with everything that had just happened, fingers threading into what was left of your hair like he needed the proof of it, needed to know you were real and warm and still here under his hands. You felt him breathe out, shaky, against you, felt the last of the tension bleed out of his shoulders the way it never quite had, not fully, not once in the entire time you'd known him.
"You scared me," you said, when you finally, barely, pulled back far enough to speak, forehead pressed to his, both of you still breathing like you'd run the whole cliff road twice over. "YouΒ scaredΒ me, don't you dare ever do that againβ"
"No promises," he murmured, and you could feel him smiling against your mouth, that same infuriating, undimmed confidence creeping back in even now, even bloodied, even seconds from death and back again. "Apparently I throw myself in front of knives for you now. New personality trait. Very inconvenient."
"Martin."
"I mean it, though." His thumb traced along your jaw, slow, and when you met his eyes there was nothing left of the joke in them at all, just something steady and stripped bare, more honest than anything he'd let you see across four days of careful, practiced charm. "I'd do it again. Every single time, exactly the same, no hesitation, and I need you to actually hear that, not just β not just as something I say to be dramatic on a cliff. I mean it."
"I heard you the first time. Right before you nearly died proving it."
"Poor timing, historically my specialty," he agreed, and kissed you again before you could argue, slower this time, both of you steadier now, no longer shaking quite so hard, just close and warm and unwilling, for a long moment, to be anything but exactly where you wereβhis hand still tangled in your hair, yours still fisted in his ruined, blood-stained shirt, the whole world narrowed down to the small distance between your mouths and the specific, dizzying fact that he was alive to kiss you back.
Somewhere nearby, Kono shrieked with pure, unrestrained delight, launching himself in a small iridescent blur to land on Martin's shoulder and chirp something that sounded, for the first time in their entire acquaintance, like approval rather than threat.
Woojoo, standing a few respectful paces off, huffed out a long breath through his nose and, for once in his entire life, looked almost pleased about something Martin had doneβears forward, head tossed once as if in reluctant, grudging blessing, the closest thing to a truce he'd ever offered.
You laughed, breathless and wet-eyed, breaking the kiss just far enough to rest your forehead against his again. "Even Kono's happy. Do you understand how significant that is? He's never once been happy about you."
"I earned it," Martin said, hoarse, still smiling like he couldn't quite stop. "Nearly dying for you apparently buys a man some goodwill, even from a judgmental little dragon who's hated me since the moment I fell through a window."
"Don't get used to it."
"Too late," he said, and pulled you back in before you could answer, no urgency left in it now, just something slow and certain and entirely unhurried, the two of you kissing on a cliff road at dawn like you had all the time in the world left to spend exactly like this.
The palace gates opened at dawn to a girl with short, plain, ordinary hair and a face the king recognized, the moment he saw it. With a certainty that needed no proof at allβsome things a parent simply knows, in the body, before the mind has caught up to explaining why.
The queen reached you first, running down the palace steps in a way queens were certainly not supposed to run, and you didn't need eighteen years of stolen memory to understand, the instant her arms closed around you, exactly what you'd been missing every single night you'd watched those lanterns from too far away.
There was a great deal to explain, afterβa kingdom's worth of grief to untangle. A name to relearn that had been yours all along, a wanted man's record to quietly, thoroughly clear, which the king accomplished within the hour with the particular efficiency of a father who had just gotten his daughter back and had no patience left for bureaucratic nonsense.
Martin stood through most of it looking deeply, uncharacteristically nervous, hands shoved in his pockets, until the king finally turned to him and said, simply, "You brought her home," and something in Martin's whole posture eased for what looked like the first time in his entire life.
Kono took up permanent residence on the windowsill of your new rooms, deeply unimpressed by the palace's excessive number of servants and considerably more impressed by the quality of the kitchen scraps. Woojoo was given, over Martin's strenuous objections, an official post as a royal guard's mount, a position he apparently found so satisfying that his campaign of vengeful boot-stepping slowed, within a few months, to something almost like fondness.
Namjoon and the rest of the hanok's strange, loyal patrons were invited, formally, to the palace for the next year's lantern festival, and caused, by every account, an enormous and thoroughly enjoyable scandal.
And every year after that, on the anniversary of the night a stranger fell through a tower window and a girl hit him with a singing bowl, the two of you took a small boat out onto the harbor when the lanterns rose. They were gold and endless, filling the sky the way they always hadβexcept now, for the first time in either of your lives, you watched them from exactly where you were always meant to be.
"Happy anniversary, my gongju," Martin said, every single year, and every single year, you believed him a little more.
if she's here
it's crystal clear
i'm where i'm meant to go
pairing. flynn rider ! martin / f ! rapunzel reader
warnings + info. oneshot, fantasy au, tangled retelling, strangers to lovers, not exactly parallel to the movie so don't be confused if some things are different, kissing, violence, imagine messyhaired!tin ok?, features many people you know and love ;)
synopsis. a handsome thief hiding from his crimes picks the wrong tower to climb into, and the girl locked inside it has been waiting her whole life for an excuse to leave.
wc. 18.3k
maddy's note. i marinated on this idea for ages and finally it has come to fruition so i cannot wait for u guys to read it π! ik my martin girls are heavily deprived so this ones for u guys hehehe but especially for meri @griinspire and pearl @marsgirltyshi and lili @chocom0ka (and seulbi but she's Gone off blr) because no one does martins gf like they do ππ!!!
there is no playlist for this because, well, it has a soundtrack of its own and quite frankly i'm a little lazy to compile songs rn............. #iseethelighttruther
tagging 90% of Core15 bc they yell at me @kaikaikoi @hyuneskkami @hollyoongs @aerinettes
Once upon a time, in a kingdom nestled between green mountains and a sea the color of jade, there was born a princess.
Of course, like any other fairytale, she was not born ordinary. On the night before her birth, a single drop of moonlight was said to have fallen from the sky and rooted itself into the earth, blooming into a flower that glowed gold from root to petal. The palace healers, desperate to save the queen who lay dying in childbed, ground the flower into a tea and poured it past her lips, and by morning the queen lived, and by evening the princess was born with a single lock of hair that shone like sunlight caught in silk.
The kingdom rang bells for three days. The king wept. The people lit lanterns and floated them on the river in thanks to whatever gods had seen fit to spare their queen and gift them a princess who glowed.
But the flower's magic had not vanished when it was boiled into tea. It had simply movedβinto the girl. Into her hair, which did not merely shine but healed, which did not merely glow but sang low and golden when the right words were spoken over it, undoing wounds, softening age, drawing sickness out of the body like poison from a wound.
There was a woman in the kingdomβnever young, never quite old, a woman the years seemed to slide off of like water off stoneβwho had known about the flower long before the healers ever found it. She had kept it hidden for a hundred years, using its magic to keep herself exactly as she wished to remain. When it was taken from her and given to a queen and consumed by a birth she had no part of, something in her curdled.
She was called, by then, only Mother.
She came for the princess on a night when the moon was new and the palace slept heavy with relief. She did not take the flower. She took the girl instead, because the girl was the flower now, and she carried her from the palace in the dark and up into the mountains, to a tower with no door, only a single window round as an eye, hidden behind a curtain of waterfall and stone.
She raised the princess as her own. She told her that the world outside was full of people who would tear her apart for the power in her hair, that the tower was the only place she would ever be safe, that Mother's loveβsharp-edged and conditional and always, always followed by but you know I only want what's best for youβwas the only love the girl would ever need.
The king and queen sent lanterns into the sky every year on their daughter's birthday, thousands of them, gold as the flower that had saved the queen's life, in the small and stubborn hope that somewhere, somehow, their daughter would see them and know she was being waited for.
The girl in the tower saw them. Every year, from her window, she watched the far-off sky fill with floating light and never once knew they were for her.
She only knew that something in her chest ached every time the horizon lit up gold, and she never could explain why.
The king and queen never stopped hoping. Every year, when the lanterns had all burned low and drifted back down to the water, the queen would stand alone at the highest window of the palace a while longer than anyone else, watching the dark where the last of the light had gone, and the king would come find her there, and neither of them would say anything at all, because there was nothing left to say that eighteen years of the same silent vigil hadn't already said a hundred times over. They kept her room exactly as it had been. They never once let themselves call it a memorial, because a memorial was for something that was over, and they had never once let themselves believe it was over.
The kingdom, for its part, grew used to the grief the way kingdoms doβfolding it quietly into tradition, into the yearly ritual of light, into a story told to children at bedtime about a princess who might, one day, come home. Most had stopped truly expecting it. The lanterns kept rising anyway. Hope, it turned out, didn't require belief to keep going. It only required someone willing to light the wick one more time.
You had lived eighteen years in that tower, and in that time you had become, out of sheer boredom and stubbornness, extremely accomplished.
You could grind ink and paint mountains that looked like the ones you'd never climbed. You could play the gayageum until your fingers bled and then keep playing anyway. You'd taught yourself to read faster than Mother liked, to argue better than Mother liked, to want more than Mother liked, though you were careful never to let her see the wanting directly. You kept it folded small, tucked behind your ribs, brought out only at night with the shutters closed, when you traced the shapes of mountains you'd painted from imagination and wondered what they smelled like up close.
Kono did not approve of the wanting.
Kono was small, no longer than your forearm, built more like a lizard than the great serpentine dragons painted on temple ceilings, but for the two soft antler-like horns that curled back from his brow and the faint iridescent sheen to his scales that shifted blue to green to gold depending on how the light caught himβthe exact shifting, you'd always thought, of oil on water, or of a fish turning in a stream. He had a long tail he liked to wrap possessively around your wrist, small clawed feet that could grip silk without snagging it, and an expression, for a creature with no eyebrows, of near-constant and deeply personal disappointment in you.Β
He had been left on your windowsill as a hatchling the summer you turned nine, small and starving and furious about it, and had simply never left, and you had never really asked why a mountain temple's guardian creature had abandoned his post to live with a girl in a tower, and he had never told you.
He was, as far as you'd ever heard, meant to bring luck. You mostly found this funny.
"I'm just saying," you told him, that particular evening, standing at the window with your chin in your hands, watching the light change over the tree line, "that if I have to hear one more story about how the outside world is full of ruffians and cutthroats waiting specifically for me, I might actually go looking for the ruffians and cutthroats just to see if they're more interesting than staying here."
Kono made a small, unimpressed noise and flicked his tail against your neck.
"You're right, you're right. Bad plan." You sighed, and the sigh fogged faintly against the cool evening air. "But it's my birthday in three days, Kono. Eighteen years old, and I've never once stood in actual dirt. Do you know how insane that is?"
He blinked his round eyes at you, which you had long since learned to interpret as yes, obviously, I have been here the entire time, why are you telling me this like it's news.
You didn't get to finish making your case, because that was the exact moment something enormous and irritable and coated in mud came flying over the tree line, followed at some distance by two men on horseback who were shouting in a way that suggested this was not a friendly race.
You watched, chin still in your hands, as the fleeing shapeβa horse, you realized, a truly furious-looking horse with no riderβthundered off in one direction, and the men gave up the chase and doubled back toward the waterfall instead, toward the tower, toward the one place in this entire kingdom that was not supposed to be findable.
Kono went rigid against your shoulder.
You, if you were being fully honest with yourself, felt something in your chest that was not quite fear. It sat right alongside the fear, close enough to be mistaken for it, but it wasn't fear.
It was closer to finally.
His name, you would learnβthough not for several more extremely tense minutesβwas Martin Edwards, and he arrived through your window the way a cat arrives through a window: badly, loudly, and with absolutely no acknowledgment that he might be intruding.
He tumbled onto your floor in a graceless heap of limbs, dragging a satchel that clinked with something metal, and had approximately one and a half seconds to register that the tower he'd chosen at complete random to hide in was, in fact, occupied, before you brought the singing bowl down over his head with every ounce of strength eighteen years of restless boredom had built into your arms.
The bowl rang out, low and resonant, an actual musical note hanging in the air over the sound of him crumpling sideways into your dried-flower arrangement.
You stood over him, bowl still raised, breathing hard, and felt, for the first time in your entire life, genuinely and thoroughly alive.
He groaned. He was, you noted with some irritation, extremely tall even lying down, all long limbs folded wrong across your floor, and even unconscious his face had the specific, punchable quality of someone who had never once in his life doubted that he was the most charming person in any room he walked into.
Kono skittered down your arm to the floor and approached the stranger with the deep suspicion of a creature sizing up a rival. He sniffed once at Martin's outstretched hand, apparently found it lacking, and turned his back on it with as much dignity as a small dragon draped in mud-splattered iridescent scales could manage.
You dragged the intruderβwith considerable effort, and a truly staggering amount of complaining directed at Kono, who offered zero helpβinto your wardrobe, and shut the door, and sat down hard on your bed with your heart going like a struck drum.
Ruffians and cutthroats, you thought, a little hysterically. Right on schedule.
He woke up loud, which you supposed made sense, given everything else about him so far.
"βokay, okay, I'm awake, I'm awake, get theβ" He kicked the wardrobe door open with a force that sent your good winter coats sliding off their hooks and staggered out into the room with both hands raised, blinking against the lamplight, and then his eyes landed on you, standing across the room with the singing bowl held out in front of you like a shield, and something in his face actually, genuinely, lit up.
"Oh," he hummed. "Hello."
"Don't move," you said.
"I'm not moving." He did not stop moving. His eyes were doing a slow, assessing sweep of the roomβthe window, the wardrobe, you, the bowl, back to youβthat you didn't love the feeling of. "Nice place. Veryβcozy. Homey. Round. You don't get a lot of round rooms."
"I said don't move."
"I'm being extremely still." He took a single, deliberate step sideways, testing you, and you swung the bowl an inch closer to his skull, and he froze with both hands up again, and something that might have been the beginning of respect crossed his face. "Okay. Fair. Noted."
Up close, in better light, he was infuriatingly good-looking in a way you resented on principle. Tallβtaller than anyone had a right to be in a low-ceilinged tower room. This ruffian was blond in a country where you'd never once seen hair that color (not that youβd really seen any other existing humans).
He had this odd and loose, careless confidence that suggested he'd never had to work particularly hard for anything, including, apparently, avoiding capture, since two very large men had chased him halfway across a mountain and he still looked more amused than afraid.
"Who are you," you snarled, "and how did you find this tower?"
"Martin Edwards." He said it like it should mean something to you. When your expression didn't change, an emotion flickered across his faceβannoyance, maybe, or the specific wound of a man whose name usually did land. "You've truly never heard of me."
"I've never heard of anyone. I live in a tower."
"Right. Yes. Fair point, very fair, I did notice theβtower situation." He gestured vaguely at the room, the window, the general concept of your entire life. "Look, I didn't find this place, I was being chased, I saw a hole in a wall of rock, I went through the hole. This was not a planned visit. I have no interest in yourβtower. Your life. Any of it. I just need to lay low for a bit and then I will be very happy to climb right back out that window and never think about any of this again."
You considered him. You considered the satchel, which he'd dropped by the wardrobe door, and which had made a very specific metallic clinking sound when he fell.
"What's in the bag?"
His whole body changedβjust slightly, just for a second, a flicker of genuine alarm before the easy charm slid back over it like a curtain. "Nothing that concerns you."
"It's in my room."
"It's in my possession."
"You're in my tower."
"Okay, fine, guess thatβsβactually a decent point." He exhaled through his nose, glanced at the window, seemed to calculate something, and then said, with the air of a man laying down a very reasonable trump card: "Tell you what. You let me leave, quietly, no fuss, and I forget this entire evening ever happened. Bag included. Everyone wins."
You should have said yes. Laterβmuch later, with the wind in your hair and your heart still going too fast in your chestβyou would think about how easy it would have been to say yes, to open the window, to let him climb back out into the night and never know what you'd almost missed.
Instead you looked past him, out your one round window, at the darkening sky, and you thought about lanterns you'd never seen up close and mountains you'd only ever painted from guesswork, and you heard yourself say, "No."
He blinked. "No?"
"You're going to take me somewhere."
"I am not."
"There's a light show. Lanterns. Every year, on theβ" you almost said my birthday, and swallowed it, some old instinct telling you not to hand a stranger that particular thread to pull. "There's a light in the sky, every year, from the direction of the kingdom. I want to see it up close. You're going to take me, and then you can have your littleβ¦ bag back."
"You don't have my bag."
"I know where you left it," you said, which was true, and gestured with your chin at Kono, who had, in the general chaos, quietly and with great personal satisfaction dragged the satchel across the floor and was now sitting on top of it with the smug posture of a creature who understood exactly what leverage was.
Martin looked at the dragon. The dragon looked at Martin. Something passed between them that you didn't fully understand yet but would come, over the following days, to recognize as the opening shot of a genuinely long and deeply petty war.
"That thing is sitting on my satchel," Martin gasped, in the tone of a man who could not quite believe the indignity of his current situation.
"His name is Kono."
"I don't care what his name is, he is sitting on myβ"
"He's very protective," you said, not entirely truthfully, since Kono's motives had far more to do with spite than protection, but you weren't about to admit that. "So. Lanterns. Then your bag. Then you go wherever it is men with bags full of clinking things go."
Martin looked at you for a long moment. He truly looked, in a way that made you resist the urge to fold your arms over your chest, and then rubbed both hands down his face and groaned like a man who'd already lost an argument he hadn't realized he was having.
"You," he chuckled in what you assume to be sarcasm, "are going to be a problem."
"Probably," you agreed, and found, to your own surprise, that you were smiling.
"For the record," he added, already turning to inspect the window, testing the give of the shutter with one hand, "I don't actually do this. Escort duty. Tour guide. Whatever this is."
"You don't have much choice."
"I have plenty of choice, lady. I'm choosing to be gracious about a bad situation, there's a difference." He glanced back at you, something assessing in the look, like he was recalculating you from scratch now that the singing bowl had been lowered. "How far is this light show, anyway?"
"I don't actually know."
"You don'tβ" He closed his eyes briefly, the particular patience of a man doing math he didn't want to do. "You dragged me into a hostage negotiation for a destination you don't know the distance to."
"It's in the direction of the kingdom. I've watched it every year from the window. It can't be that far."
"'Can't be that far' has gotten men killed, you know."
"You'll live," you said, with far more confidence than you actually possessed, and went to go retrieve your good travelling shoes, leaving him standing by the window looking like a man reconsidering every choice that had led him to this particular evening.
You changed, too, while he waitedβout of the loose sleeping robes you'd been in when he'd fallen through your window and into the good hanbok you'd been saving, the one Mother had commissioned for a birthday you weren't allowed to leave the tower to celebrate.
Pale jeogori embroidered along the collar with thread the color of new leaves, the chima falling in soft, heavy folds you'd never actually walked any real distance in, sash tied the way you'd practiced a hundred times alone in front of a mirror with no one to see it.
It felt strange, dressing for a world you'd never been allowed into. It felt stranger still, catching your own reflection in the dark window glass, to think that you might actually look like you belonged there.
Were youβ¦ scared? No. Surely not. You wanted this. Itβs practically your lifeβs purpose. But what about Mother? She had kept you safe and protected from the evils of that world for all your life and wouldnβt this be taking that protection for granted?Β
"You're stalling," Martin called, from somewhere near the window.
"I'm preparing."
"You've re-tied that sash three times."
"It has to sit correctly or it'll come loose on the climb down."
"It's a piece of fabric, not a structural pillarβ"
"Do you want my help escaping or not?"
That, at least, bought you the silence you needed to finish, smoothing the last fold flat with hands that weren't quite steady, and when you finally turned around he'd gone quiet in a different way, something briefly, helplessly caught in his expression before he covered it with a cough and a very deliberate glance toward the window.
"Ready?" he asked.
"Ready," you said, and meant it more than you expected to.
Getting out of the tower took considerably longer than getting in, mostly because you insisted on doing it via the long braided rope of your own hairβwhich made Martin's expression do something complicated and slightly ill when you explained the general mechanics of your situationβand partly because you stopped four separate times on the way down to look at things. A bird. The particular texture of the moss on the tower's stone base. Your own hands, dirt-smudged for the first time in your life, which you held up in the fading light like they belonged to someone else.
"You're doing something weird with your face," Martin said, from where he was waiting with visibly diminishing patience at the base of the waterfall.
"What thing."
"Theβ" he gestured at your entire self, "βwide-eyed newborn puppy thing. It's very slow."
"I've never touched a river before."
"You've touched water before."
"Not river water. It's cold. It's moving. Did you know it does that? Justβmoves, constantly, going somewhereβ"
"Incredible information. Truly a marvel of the natural world. Can weβ"
"Give me one more minute."
You did not give him one more minute. You gave him closer to ten, crouched at the edge of the water with your skirts hiked up and your bare feet in the current, laughingβactually laughing, a real sound you weren't sure you'd made before, not like this, not from somewhere this deepβwhile Martin stood a respectful distance away with his arms crossed and an expression that was trying very hard to stay annoyed and mostly failing.
"You know," he said, eventually, watching you, "for a girl who apparently thinks the entire world is trying to eat her alive, you're taking this remarkably well."
"I never said the world was trying to eat me."
"You have the exact energy of someone who was told that, yes."
You didn't answer that, because it was uncomfortably accurate, and instead climbed back up onto the bank and reached for the little cloth bag Mother had never let you leave without, purely out of habitβand then remembered you'd left the tower entirely, that Mother was three days out at her own errand, that there was no one to sneak anything past anymore, and the freedom of that thought hit you somewhere just under your ribs hard enough that you had to sit with it a second.
Martin was watching your face do something complicated.
"You okay, Princess?"
You blinked at him. "What did you call me?"
"Princess." He shrugged easily, like he'd been waiting for an excuse. "Means gongju. You know. Lost girl, hidden tower, guarded like she's made of something preciousβyou have to admit it tracks."
"I'm not a princess."
"I didn't say you were. I said it tracks." He was grinning now, delighted with himself in a way that made you want to throw something at him. "There's an actual missing princess, you know. Whole kingdom's been mourning her for eighteen years. Lanterns every year on her birthday, the whole thing. Iβm guessing thatβs what youβre trying to see. Funny coincidence, a girl locked in a tower wanting to see the exact same lanterns."
"Coincidences happen."
"Sure they do." He fell into step beside you, hands tucked behind his head, entirely too pleased with the theory he was clearly not going to let go of. "Or, alternatively, I could just call you 'princess.' Would you prefer that? Since you don't know what it means. I mean, I'm sure a sheltered young lady like yourself, freshly escaped from an entire lifetime in a stone tower, wouldn't be familiar with a word like that. Itβs English. Very obscure. Very advanced."
"I know what it means, I was born here, same as you."
"Do you though? Prove it."
"I'm not proving anything to you."
"Because you can't."
"Because it's beneath me."
"There it is," he said, snapping his fingers, delighted. "Gongju behavior if I've ever seen it."
"I will push you into the river."
"You're welcome to try, princess."
"You know what's funny," Martin said, a little while later, once you'd both fallen into an easier walking rhythm and the sun had dropped low enough to gild the tops of the trees. "You never actually told me your name."
You hesitated. It wasn't that you didn't have oneβMother had given you one, early, though she'd used it so rarely, always preferring darling or sweet girl or, when she was displeased, no name at all, just a long and pointed silenceβit was that saying it out loud to a stranger on your first night outside a tower felt like handing over something you weren't sure yet was safe to hand over.
"I'm not telling you."
"Why not?"
"Because you'll use it against me somehow. You seem like the type."
"I am offended." He didn't sound offended. He sounded thrilled, the way he sounded about most things that gave him new material to work with. "Fine. Keep your mystery. I'll just keep calling you gongju, then, and everyone we meet is going to assume you actually are the missing princess, and it'll be your fault when the whole kingdom starts a rumor."
"Nobody's going to believe that."
"You'd be surprised what people believe about a girl who climbs out of a tower on a rope made of her own hair."
You didn't have a good answer for that, mostly because it was, again, unfairly accurate, and you settled instead for shoving him lightly with your shoulder, which did nothing except make him laugh.
"Say it, then," you said. "Princess. If that's what you're going to call me, I want to actually hear you say the real word, not just the joke version."
He said itβproperly this time, no mockery in it, the vowels landing soft and familiar in a way that startled you a little, like hearing a song you hadn't realized you knew the words to.
"There," he said. "Happy?"
"You're still not calling me that."
"I'm absolutely calling you that. It's efficient. It's accurate, probably. And frankly," he added, glancing sideways at you with something almost gentle underneath the usual smugness, "it suits you better than whatever your actual name is going to turn out to be."
"You don't even know my actual name."
"I don't need to. I've got a working theory and I like it. A sheltered young lady," he said, drawing the words out with exaggerated care, "freshly liberated from a tower, apparently unfamiliar with basic Korean vocabularyβreally, it all fits."
"I am not unfamiliar with basicβ"
"Prove it. What's gongju mean, then, if you know it so well?"
"It means princess, and you know I know that, you're just being insufferable on purpose."
"On purpose and very successfully," he agreed, entirely too pleased with himself, and you gave up trying to win the argument and let yourself, instead, enjoy the specific, unfamiliar pleasure of being teased by someone who clearly wasn't trying to hurt you with it.
You did not push him into the river, mostly because you were fairly sure you'd fall in with him, but you thought about it, hard, the entire rest of the walk, while he hummed something tuneless and infuriating under his breath and Kono rode along in the fold of your sleeve making small disapproving noises every time Martin so much as glanced in your direction.
You noticed, though you weren't going to say it out loud, that he never actually stopped. Princess. Not once, the rest of that day, or the day after, or any of the days that came after that. It stuck the way nicknames only stick when the person using them has decided, somewhere below the joking, that they mean it.
The wanted poster was nailed to a tree at the first crossroads you came to, curling slightly at the corners from weather, and you might have walked right past it if Martin hadn't gone abruptly, suspiciously quiet beside you.
You looked. Then you looked again, closer, and had to physically bite down on the inside of your cheek to keep from laughing.
It was, unmistakably, himβsame jaw, same insufferable eyebrows, same general air of a man who thought quite highly of himselfβexcept that whoever had drawn it had rendered his mouth as a row of crooked, gap-toothed, wildly uneven teeth, snaggled in every direction like a fence that had lost a fight with a storm.
"That is not accurate," Martin yelled, very fast, snatching the poster down off the tree before you could get a proper look.
"That isβthat is artistic license, that is a hack sketch artist with a grudge and no talent, my teeth areβ" he actually opened his mouth to demonstrate, tilting his head back, and you had to admit, unwillingly, that his teeth were in fact very straight, surprisingly white, entirely unremarkable in the best possible way. "See? Perfect. Immaculate. I have never once in my life had a complaint about my teeth, I get compliments on my teethβ"
"From who?"
"Fromβpeople. Women. Discerning women with excellent taste who appreciate a goodβ"
"It says here you're a wanted thief," you hummed, reading over his shoulder now that he'd lowered the poster in his outrage, "with a reward ofβ" you did the math and had to stop and reread it, "βthat is a genuinely enormous amount of money."
"It's inflated. That's aβthat's a gross exaggeration of my worth, I'm not worth that much, this is clearly aβ"
"You're arguing that you're worth less than a wanted poster says?"
"I'm arguing that the number is inaccurate, there's a difference, the number is clearly designed to encourage overzealous bounty hunting, it's a scare tacticβ"
"So you agree you're worth stealing."
"That is notβthat is not what I said, you're twisting my words, this is exactly the kind of thing I was worried about when you insisted on coming along, you're going to misquote me to guards at some point and get us bothβ"
"I'm just reading what's written."
He scoffed and kicked a rock. "You're reading it with inflection."
"I'm reading it with my normal voice."
"You said 'genuinely enormous amount of money' like it was a personal insult to me specifically."
"You seem more upset about the teeth than the wanted part."
"Because the wanted part is accurate," he said, with the flat honesty of a man too distracted by dental slander to bother lying. "I am wanted. I did steal something. The teeth, though. The teeth are slander."
"What did you steal?"
He hesitatedβand it was the first genuinely unguarded pause you'd seen from him all dayβand then folded the poster into quarters and shoved it into his satchel with a little more force than necessary. "Doesn't matter. Ancient history. Water under the bridge."
"You stole it approximately six hours ago."
"Extremely ancient, in relative terms." He set off walking again, faster than before, and you had to jog a few steps to catch up, Kono digging tiny claws into your shoulder to keep his balance.
"You're not going to tell me."
"I am not."
"Is it the crown," you guessed, because you'd caught the edge of gold in the satchel earlier, glinting when Kono had dragged it across the floor, and you watched his shoulders go very slightly, very deliberately stiff.
"No," he said, in a tone that meant yes, and you decided, generously, to let him have it, mostly because you were far more interested in the actual horse that had just come thundering around the bend in the road, nostrils flaring, eyes locked on Martin with an expression of pure, personal, long-simmering rage.
"Oh, no," Martin said.
"Is thatβ"
"That is Woojoo, yes, that is my horse, that is a long, complicated relationshipβ"
Woojoo did not stop for pleasantries. He came at Martin like a man settling a debt, and the next several minutes dissolved into a genuinely spectacular chase around a small clearing that involved Martin climbing a tree, Woojoo standing guard at the base of said tree with the patient menace of a creature who had all the time in the world, and you sitting on a fallen log with Kono, watching, thoroughly entertained.
"He's not usually like this," Martin called down, from somewhere in the upper branches.
"He seems very consistent, actually."
"Okay, he's exactly like this, every time, it'sβwe have history, this horse and I, it's complicatedβ"
"He's a horse."
"He's vindictive, is what he is, he's been trying to get me arrested for two years, that's not normal horse behavior, that's a personal vendettaβ"
Kono made a small, delighted chattering noise beside you, which you were beginning to understand meant something close to finally, someone gets it, and when you glanced down at him he was watching Woojoo with what could only be described as newfound professional respect.
"What exactly did you do to him," you called up, watching Woojoo pace a slow, deliberate circle around the base of the tree, occasionally rearing to paw at the lowest branch just to remind Martin he had options.
"I didn't do anything, he's just been like this since I acquired him."
"You stole him."
"I acquired him. There's a nuance."
"From who?"
"From a royal stable, technically, but in my defense he was clearly unhappy there, high-strung, difficult, the stablemaster hated himβI did him a favor, honestly, and this is the thanks I get, two years of relentless, targeted footwear-based revengeβ"
Woojoo, as if personally offended by the retelling, reared up again with a furious whinny and got one hoof solidly against the trunk hard enough to shake the branch Martin was gripping, sending down a small shower of leaves and one extremely undignified yelp.
"He understood that," you gasped and shook your head. "He understood every word of that and he took offense."
"Horses don't understand language."
"This one might."
"This one is a menace, is what he is," Martin said, adjusting his grip with the particular caution of a man who had recently reconsidered his life choices, "a genuine menace who has decided, for reasons known only to himself, that his sole purpose on this earth is making my life difficultβ"
You decided, watching the standoff continue with no signs of resolving itself, that this was likely to go on for some time if left entirely to the two of them, and so you climbed down off your log, brushed off your skirts, and walked directly up to Woojoo with far more confidence than you actually felt.
He swung his great head toward you, ears pinned, nostrils flaring, and for a moment you thought you'd badly misjudged the situationβand then, slowly, his ears came up, and he leaned his head down toward you with something almost curious, blowing a warm breath across your palm when you held it out.
"There," you murmured. "See? I'm not the one who stole an apple from your feed bag."
"You heard about the apple thingβ" Martin's voice, muffled and betrayed, from somewhere above.
Woojoo made a low, satisfied sort of noise, nudging his nose against your shoulder, and you had the distinct impression, ridiculous as it was, that you had just been recruited onto a very specific and very committed team.
It took another twenty minutes, a great deal of undignified negotiating, andβeventuallyβyou stepping in to physically stand between horse and man with your hands raised in a gesture of peace, before Woojoo agreed, with visible reluctance, to a temporary truce, on the conditionβas far as you could interpret from a horse's expressionβthat he got to walk close enough to occasionally, "accidentally," step on the back of Martin's boot.
"This is humiliating," Martin muttered, as you all set off again, horse and dragon flanking either side of you like a pair of extremely judgmental honor guards.
"I think it's going great," you said, and meant it.
The hanok appeared out of the trees just as the light was going properly gray, low and wide-roofed in the old style, warm lantern-light spilling from its paper windows, smoke curling from a chimney with the smell of something roasting.
"Absolutely not," Martin said, the second he clocked it. "No. We're walking past this. This is a place I have specifically, personally, at great cost, learned to walk past."
"Why?"
"Because it's full of the single worst collection of degenerates in this entire kingdom, and every single one of them would sell me out for a fraction of that reward money without blinking."
"So we're not going in."
"We are absolutely not going in."
You went in.
In your defense, you hadn't fully decided to defy him so much as your feet had simply kept walking while your brain was still weighing the pros and cons, and by the time Martin caught up to grab your sleeve you were already three steps through the door. Into a low, smoke-hazed room packed with the strangest assembly of people you had ever seen in your entireβadmittedly very limitedβexperience of people.
There was a man built like a small mountain, missing most of his teeth, gently carving what appeared to be a delicate wooden hairpin. There was someone in the corner whose face you genuinely could not parse in the low lightβtoo many angles, somehow, like looking at a person through cracked glassβquietly mending a fan.
There were twin brothers arm-wrestling with murderous focus over what turned out, on closer inspection, to be a single dumpling. Someone had a pet weasel draped around their neck like a scarf. Someone else appeared to be knitting something with visibly too many needles. The whole room smelled like woodsmoke and old rice wine and something underneath that you couldn't place and didn't especially want to.
Every single head in the room turned when the door swung shut behind you.
"We're leaving," Martin said, very quietly, into your ear.
"Is that Martin Edwards?" said the mountain-sized man with the hairpin, in a voice that dropped the temperature of the room several degrees.
"No," Martin said.
"That's definitely him," said someone else.
"That is notβokay, fine, hi, yes, hello everyone, lovely establishment, we're just passing throughβ"
What followed was, by your private accounting, one of the strangest and best evenings of your entire life.
It started with the reward moneyβsomeone in the back producing a slightly more accurate wanted poster, teeth and all, and passing it around with escalating commentary, the twins, apparently named Seonghyeon and Juhoon, abandoning their dumpling war entirely to lean over and study Martin's face against the drawing with academic seriousnessβand slid, somehow, without your ever quite catching the exact moment it happened, into a full-throated, half-drunk, wildly enthusiastic taunting song, the whole room joining in verse by verse, about every humiliating thing anyone in the establishment had ever heard about Martin Edwards.
The man with the weasel started it, banging a wooden cup against the table for rhythm, and it snowballed from there the way these things always seemed to in a room full of people who'd clearly been waiting years for an excuse.
Oh, the boy who came from nowhere, with his smile and his fine clothesβthinks he's someone, thinks he's special, thinks the whole wide kingdom knows,
sang the man with the weasel, and the twins picked it up without missing a beat, still slightly out of breath from the dumpling war,
but we remember when he begged us for a bowl of rice, a place to sleepβnow he struts around in silk scraps calling himself something deep!
"That is one time," Martin said, to no one in particular, to the entire room, to the universe. "That was one specific winter,that is not a fair representative sample of myβ"
Nobody was listening. The person with too many needles had abandoned her knitting entirely to conduct the room like an orchestra, and Namjoon's booming baritone came in over the top of everyone else's,
Oh, his teeth are crooked as a fence line, oh, his hair's a rooster's crest, and the last time that he tried to smolder a fisherman's wife laughed so hard she fell in the river and had to be fished out herself β
which was, you gathered, not even remotely true and possibly the single funniest thing anyone had said all evening, judging by the way Martin's whole face went scarlet and the room dissolved into fresh, delighted chaos.
"That last one isn't even trueβ" Martin tried, over the singing, and got roundly ignored, and you watched, absolutely delighted, from your seat on an overturned barrel, as an entire room of strangers dismantled him verse by gleeful verse, and did not, notably, join inβnot because you weren't tempted, but because you found it far funnier to simply watch his face while it happened, the specific, put-upon suffering of a man who could not decide whether to laugh or storm out and kept landing, over and over, on some helpless combination of both.
There was something underneath the teasing, too, that you only half caughtβa warmth in it, the particular rough affection of people who'd known someone a long time and had earned the right to be cruel to him in a way that was really just another word for fond.
Namjoon clapped Martin on the shoulder hard enough to stagger him mid-verse and called him boy in a voice gone suddenly soft under all the noise.
You found yourself wondering, not for the first time that night, exactly how long ago it had been that a much younger Martin Edwards had first shown up in a place like this with nowhere else to go, and exactly what had happened to him before that, that a room full of thieves and degenerates had ended up feeling, to him, like the closest thing to family he had.
You filed the thought away to ask about later. You had a feeling it wasn't a question he'd answer easily, or sober, or with an audience.
"You're not even going to defend me," he said to you, mid-chorus, over the noise.
"I'm having a wonderful time."
"That is betrayal, that's what that isβ"
"They're not even wrong about the teeth thing."
"They are entirely wrong about the teeth thing, my teeth are fineβ"
Somewhere around the fourth verse, the man with the hairpinβwhose name, you'd gathered, was something like Namjoon, though it was hard to be sure over the singingβleaned across the table toward you with the particular intensity of someone who had decided you were the most interesting thing in the room.
"You," he pointed. "You have good energy. You've never danced on a table before, have you?"
"I've never been in a room before," you said, honestly, which seemed to delight him even further.
"Well," he said, standing, extending a huge, hairpin-carving hand toward you with genuine ceremony, "there's a first time."
You should have said no. You thought, distantly, of Mother's voice, of every warning about the danger and filth of the outside world, and then you thought about how good it had felt, hours ago, to have your bare feet in a river for the first time in your life, and you took the enormous man's hand and let him haul you, laughing, up onto the low wooden table.
It turned out you were, against every expectation, a genuinely excellent dancerβeighteen years of solitary practice in a round tower room had to be good for somethingβand the room roared its approval as you spun, skirts of your hanbok flaring out around your ankles, hair flowing, laughing so hard your ribs ached.
Martin stood below the table with an expression that had stopped being annoyed several minutes ago and had settled into something else entirely, something he was clearly trying very hard not to let show on his face and failing at almost completely.
The twins abandoned all pretense of arm-wrestling entirely to bang out a rhythm on the tabletop with the flats of their hands, and the man with the weasel produced, from some hidden pocket, a small reed flute he turned out to play with startling skill, weaving a quick, bright melody underneath the room's continued heckling of Martin, who had by now given up defending his teeth entirely and switched to a full, aggrieved commentary on the general injustice of his evening.
"This is not what I agreed to when I climbed through that window," he called up at you, though he was smiling despite himself, that same helpless, undone expression creeping further across his face with every spin you took. "I signed up for hiding. Quietly. In a tower. Notβthis. Not a full musical indictment of my character followed by you personally providing the evening's entertainment."
"You're welcome to join me," you called back, breathless, delighted, and watched with enormous satisfaction as his face went briefly, thoroughly panicked.
"Absolutely not."
"Coward."
"Strategist. There's a meaningful difference between the twoβ"
Namjoon, still clapping along from below, tipped his head back and roared with laughter loud enough to rattle the paper windows, and even Kono, perched safely on a high shelf out of the way of the chaos, seemed to have relaxed enough to bob his small head faintly along with the flute's rhythm, which you filed away as further evidence, alongside the nose-attack yet to come, that his feelings about Martin were considerably more complicated than his usual sniffing disdain let on.
It was, of course, at that exact momentβyou spinning, laughing, glowing in the lanternlight, framed perfectly in the hanok's single paper windowβthat the door burst open.
Mother stood in the frame, still dressed for travel, face utterly, terribly still, and every single sound in the room died at once.
You would replay the next thirty seconds for years afterward and never fully be able to piece together the order they happened in.
Mother's eyes found yours across the room and something in them cracked openβnot relief, you understood, even in the moment, even through the roaring in your ears. Not relief. Fury, dressed up as fear, the way it always was.
"You," Mother said, and her voice, even pitched low, even across a room gone suddenly silent, carried the way it always had, carved out of something colder than the room's actual temperature. She didn't shout. She never shouted; shouting would have meant losing something, and Mother did not lose things, she simply took them back. "Get down from there. Now."
You didn't move. You were aware, distantly, of how strange it wasβthat a woman who had raised you for eighteen years, whose voice had shaped nearly every rule you'd ever lived by, could stand in a doorway and still make your whole body want to obey before your mind had caught up to deciding whether it should.
"I was justβ"
"I don't care what you were just. Look at you. Look at what he's done to you already." Mother's eyes flicked, briefly, murderously, to Martin, standing frozen below the table. "This is exactly what I warned you about. Exactly. One night outside that tower and already you'reβ" she gestured, sharp and contemptuous, at the whole scene, the hanok, the strangers, your loosened hair, "β this."
"This is the most fun I've had in my entire life," you said, and heard your own voice shake only slightly.
Something in Mother's face did something complicatedβnot softened, not exactly, but shifted, the fury underneath it briefly, dangerously exposed. "That tower kept you safe."
"That tower kept me contained."
"There she is," said someoneβone of the guards behind Mother, you realized, a whole detail of them, come looking for the man on the wanted poster and finding, instead, considerably more than they'd bargained for.
The room dissolved into chaos.
Later, you would understand that half the hanok's patrons had their own reasons to want no part of a run-in with royal guards, and so what happened next was less an act of loyalty to you or Martin specifically and more a matter of shared, practical self-interestβbut in the moment it felt like nothing short of a miracle.
The mountain of a man with the hairpin suddenly hauling a table sideways to block the door, the twins scattering rice wine across the floor to send the first guard through it skidding, the person with too many needles somehow managing to tangle an entire coil of yarn around someone's ankles.
"Move, moveβ" Martin had you by the wrist, hauling you off the table and through a low doorway at the back of the hanok you hadn't even noticed, past a stack of firewood that Namjoon shoved aside with one huge hand to reveal a narrow black gap in the wall, barely wide enough for the two of you, sloping down into the dark.
"In, go, goβ" and then you were falling, more than climbing, into a tunnel that smelled of packed earth and old stone, Martin's hand fused to your wrist. Kono was a frantic weight against your collarbone, the sound of shouting and splintering wood fading fast above you as the two of you half-ran, half-stumbled through absolute blackness.
The tunnel was narrower than it had looked from the mouth of itβlow enough in places that Martin had to duck, cursing under his breath every time his shoulder caught stone, and twice the passage forked without warning, no light to guide the choice, nothing but Martin's hand tightening around yours and a muttered "left, I think, leftβ" that you had no way of verifying and every reason to simply trust.
Somewhere behind you, muffled through packed earth, you heard the unmistakable scrape of the firewood being shoved aside a second time, and a voiceβnot Mother's, one of the guards, sharp and close in a way that made your stomach dropβcalling that they'd found the passage.
"Faster," Martin breathed, and you didn't need telling twice, your bare palm scraping stone as you half-felt your way forward, heart slamming so hard you could feel it in your throat. The darkness pressed close enough on every side that for one disorienting stretch you lost all sense of which way was even forward anymore, trusting nothing but the grip of his hand and the sound of his breathing just ahead of you.
A light bobbed somewhere behindβtorchlight, catching the tunnel wall in a brief orange smear before you rounded another bend and lost it againβand you thought, with a clarity that cut cleanly through the panic, they're going to catch us, and then, right on its heels, absurdly, I don't even care, this is the most alive I have ever felt in my entire life.
You should have been terrified.
Some distant, sensible part of you understood that you were, technically, terrifiedβMother's face, the guards, the very real danger of the last thirty secondsβand yet underneath the fear was something so bright and enormous it eclipsed nearly everything else, something that had been building all day, all evening, every single moment since your feet first touched river water, and it broke open now in the pitch dark of that tunnel as something you could only describe as pure, uncut joy.
You were laughing. You realized it somewhere in the second minute of running, blind, hand in hand with a wanted thief, chased by your own mother's guards, and you were laughing so hard you could barely breathe, and Martinβsomewhere ahead of you in the dark, breathless himselfβstarted laughing too, and the two of you burst out of the far end of the tunnel into open moonlit air still half-doubled over, gasping, giddy, alive in a way you didn't have words for yet.
You collapsed against a fallen log at the tunnel's mouth, chest heaving, hair a wild mess around your shoulders, and looked up at the starsβmore of them than you'd ever seen from your tower window, spilled out edge to edge across the whole enormous skyβand thought, with a clarity that startled you: this. This is what I wanted.
"You," Martin said, still catching his breath beside you, staring at you like he was seeing something for the first time, "are a genuinely terrifying person."
"I danced on a table."
"You incited a riot."
"I think that was mostly you."
"No, that wasβokay, that was a little me, but youβ" he gestured at you, helplessly, at your wrecked hair and your flushed face and the grin you couldn't have wiped off if you tried, "βyou're supposed to be the sheltered one. The tower girl. And instead you're out here dancing on tables and outrunning royal guards on your first day of freedom like you were made for it."
"Maybe I was."
Something shifted in his face when you said thatβquick, unguarded, gone almost before you could catch itβand for a second neither of you said anything at all, just sat there in the moonlight with your shoulders nearly touching, breathing hard, the tunnel's dark mouth still gaping open behind you.
"Princess," he said, quieter now, no teasing in it at all.
"That's not my name."
"I know." He was still looking at you. "Doesn't mean it's not true."
You let the silence sit for a moment, the two of you still catching your breath, the tunnel's dark mouth gaping open behind you like something that had swallowed the version of yourself who'd walked into that hanok an hour ago and spat out someone slightly different.
"Can I ask you something," you said, eventually.
"You're going to anyway."
"That man. Namjoon. He called you boy like he'd known you a long time."
Something in Martin's face shuttered, just slightly, the easy grin dimming a few degrees without fully disappearing. "Long time's a strong way to put it."
"How long?"
He was quiet long enough that you thought he wasn't going to answer at all, picking at a loose thread on his sleeve with more focus than the thread deserved.
"I grew up in an orphanage," he said finally, not looking at you. "Not a nice one. The kind that stops feeding you the second you're old enough to feed yourself, more or less. I left when I was about twelve, lived rough for a while, and that placeβthat hanok, all those people you just watched sing an entire ballad about my teethβthat was the first place that ever fed me without asking anything back the first time I walked in half-starved and half my current size. So. Long time. Longer than I usually admit to strangers who hit me with singing bowls."
"I'm not a stranger anymore."
"No," he agreed, glancing at you sideways, something almost surprised in it, like he was only just now noticing that fact himself. "I suppose you're not."
"Is that why you steal things? Because nobody ever gave you anything, so you decided to just take it instead?"
"That's very poetic. Did you rehearse that."
"I'm asking a real question."
He exhaled, long, and looked back up at the stars instead of at you. "Something like that, probably. I used to tell myself it was about the money. One good score, enough to disappear somewhere nobody's ever heard the name Martin Edwards, buy myself an island, live like a king who answers to nobody."
He shrugged, and the shrug didn't quite land the way he probably wanted it to. "Lately I've started to suspect it was never really about the money at all. Might've just been about proving I could have something. Anything. That nobody could take away from me the way everything got taken when I was a kid."
You didn't say anything right away. You thought about eighteen years in a round tower, about a woman who called your safety love and meant, underneath it, control, about how you'd never once had anything that was fully, unquestionably yours eitherβnot your name, not your time, not even, until tonight, your own two feet standing wherever they wanted to stand.
"I think," you said slowly, "we might have more in common than you'd expect from a lost girl and a thief."
"You admit it, then. Princess."
"I admit nothing. I'm making an observation about orphaned longing, don't twist it into something else."
He laughed at thatβa real laugh, surprised out of himβand some of the tightness went out of his shoulders. "Orphaned longing. You really did rehearse that."
"I did not."
"You absolutely did, you've been sitting on that phrase since the tunnel."
"I have never sat on a phrase in my life," you said, with as much dignity as you could manage, and he laughed again, and the two of you sat there a while longer in the moonlight, not saying much else, letting the quiet settle into something that felt less like the awkward silence of strangers and more like the comfortable kind that came, usually, from people who'd known each other a great deal longer than one very strange day.
The next two days passed the way you imagined a fever mightβbright and disorienting and slightly unreal, every hour crowded with more new things than you'd experienced in the previous eighteen years combined.
You learned that Martin snored, faintly, when he slept sitting up against a tree, and that Woojoo had apparently made it his personal mission to step on his boots at every possible opportunity for the rest of what you assumed would be their entire acquaintance.
You learned that Kono had strong opinions about which berries were safe to eat and communicated them via a truly impressive range of disapproving noises. You learned the names of three separate mountain ranges, none of which matched the ones you'd painted from imagination, and foundβto your surpriseβthat you liked the real ones better.
You found a stream on the first afternoon, cold and clear and shallow enough to wade into without fear, and spent nearly an hour there simply standing in it, letting the current pull at the hem of your hanbok, while Martin sat on the bank pretending not to watch you and failing at it almost entirely.
When you splashed himβdeliberately, gleefully, without an ounce of remorseβhe retaliated with such wounded overcommitment that the two of you ended up soaked through within minutes, both of you laughing too hard to properly aim, Kono shrieking indignantly from a dry rock where he'd wisely relocated at the first sign of hostilities, and Woojoo watching the entire spectacle from the treeline with what you could only describe as profound equine disappointment in both of you.
You learned, too, in quieter moments, the shape of things Martin didn't say out loud.
The way he went very still and unusually gentle whenever you flinched at a loud noise, some old tower-bred instinct you hadn't fully shaken; the way he always, without seeming to think about it, put himself slightly between you and the road whenever another traveler passed.
The way he never once, not even once, asked why a girl who'd apparently never left a tower before knew so much about anatomy or herbs or the exact temperature at which honey turned to poison in the wrong hands, information you'd absorbed purely from Mother's paranoid insistence on preparing you for dangers that had never once, until this week, actually arrived.
You also learned, gradually, and against your own better judgment, that you liked Martin Edwards considerably more than you'd planned to.
He tried the smolder on the second evening, apropos of nothing, while you were both crouched by a small campfire waiting for a rabbit he'd insisted, with wild overconfidence, that he knew how to properly cook.
You caught him doing it out of the corner of your eye firstβa slow, deliberate turn of his head toward you, chin dropping slightly, eyes going half-lidded and soft in a way that was clearly meant to be devastating, one eyebrow lifting with the practiced precision of a man who had, you suspected, spent real time perfecting this exact expression in the reflection of still water.
You stared at him.
He held the look.
You kept staring.
He held it a little longer, jaw set, the corner of his mouth doing something you assumed was supposed to read as rakish,and you watched, fascinated, as the muscles around his eye began, very slightly, to twitch with the effort of maintaining it.
"What are you doing," you said finally.
The smolder collapsed instantly, entirely, like a tent losing its center pole. "Nothing."
"You were doing something with your face."
"I was not doing anything with my face, that's just my face, that's how my face looksβ"
"Your face looked like you were having some kind of episode."
"That," Martin said, with wounded dignity, turning very deliberately back to the fire, "is called charisma, and it has worked on every singleβyou know what, never mind. Forget it. Rabbit's probably done."
"Try it again."
He looked at you, suspicious. "Why."
"I want to see if it's worse the second time or if that was just a fluke."
"It is not going to be worse, it is going to be exactly as devastating as the first time, I simply chose not to fully commit to it because I was distracted by the rabbitβ"
"Prove it."
He set his jaw, visibly gathering himself, and tried againβchin dropping, eyes half-lidding, that same eyebrow rising with what was clearly meant to be effortless, smoldering confidenceβand made it a full three seconds before a piece of ash popped from the fire close enough to his knee that he flinched, hard, breaking the whole expression apart into a startled yelp that had absolutely nothing rakish about it whatsoever.
You laughed so hard you had to set down the stick you'd been roasting your portion of rabbit on, doubling over, and Martin sat there looking deeply, personally betrayed by an ember.
"That doesn't count," he said, with the flat, aggrieved certainty of a man who knew perfectly well that it counted completely. "That was an unrelated incident. The face itself was flawless right up until the interruption."
"I've genuinely never seen anything less flawless in my life."
"You've been alive for four days outside a tower, your knowledge is extremely limitedβ"
"I've seen Woojoo make a more convincing case for himself."
"Now you're just being cruel."
"I'm being honest," you said, wiping at your eyes, and he huffed, and threw a small twig at you that you batted easily out of the air, and the two of you settled back into an easy quiet, the fire popping softly between you, Woojoo a dark, watchful shape at the edge of the clearing, apparently satisfied enough with the evening's proceedings to have stopped glaring, for once.
The rabbit was not, in fact, done, nor would it ever really achieve a state you could confidently call cooked, and you ate it anyway, sitting close enough to the fire that your shoulders kept brushing, and somewhere in the space of that mealβburnt, underdone, genuinely one of the worst things you'd ever eaten and yet somehow, impossibly, one of your favorite meals of your entire lifeβyou caught yourself watching the firelight move across his face and thinking, with a lurch you weren't at all prepared for, oh. Oh, no.
Kono, curled in your lap, looked up at you with an expression you were beginning to read with alarming fluency, and it said, quite clearly: I saw that. We are going to discuss this later.
"Shut up," you told him, out loud, and Martin glanced over.
"I didn't say anything."
"Not you." You nodded down at Kono, who flicked his tail smugly. "Him."
"That thing has never liked me."
"He doesn't like anyone."
"He likes you."
"I raised him from an egg, that's different."
"Sure." Martin was smiling now, small and real, none of the practiced charm from earlier, just something quieter underneath it. "He's very protective. It's actually a little sweet. In aβweirdly feral, judgmental sort of way."
"Don't call my dragon feral."
"I would never," he said, entirely unconvincingly, and you laughed, and Kono made a noise of deep personal offense, and somewhere above you the first stars were coming out over a sky that would, tomorrow night, on the night of your birthday, fill entirely with gold.
The village you passed through the next morning was small and half-asleep, a scatter of tile-roofed houses along a single dusty road, a well at the center where two old women stood gossiping over their buckets, a market just beginning to set up its stalls in the cool early lightβand you stood at the edge of it for a long moment, just looking, before Martin had to physically steer you forward by the shoulder.
"You're doing the thing again."
"I've never seen a market before."
"You've never seen anything before, that's becoming a running theme of this trip." But he said it gently, none of his usual bite in it, and let you drift from stall to stall at your own paceβa woman selling dried persimmons strung on twine, a man with a cart of polished wooden combs, a girl not much younger than you hawking little clay bells that chimed high and sweet when you touched them.
You bought nothing, because you had no money, a fact that seemed to strike Martin as personally intolerable the moment he noticed you eyeing a small painted fan for the third time.
"Here," he said, and before you could stop him he'd produced a string of coins from somewhere inside his jacketβyou didn't ask where, and strongly suspected you didn't want to knowβand pressed them into the fan-seller's hand with the easy, practiced charm of a man who did this sort of thing often, emerging a moment later to hand you the fan with a small, exaggerated bow. "For the gongju."
"You don't have to do that."
"I know I don't have to. I'm choosing to. There's a difference, I keep telling you this."
You turned the fan over in your handsβpainted with a scene of cranes over a lake, delicate, nothing like the practical, sturdy things Mother had ever allowed youβand felt something in your chest go warm and a little overwhelmed, the specific ache of being given something small and unnecessary and entirely, purely kind.
"Thank you," you said, and meant it more than the words could really carry.
"Don't get used to it," Martin said, though his ears had gone faintly pink again, the way they did whenever you caught him being sincere. "I have a reputation to maintain. Ruthless. Self-interested. Very hard to impress."
"You just bought a stranger a fan."
"I bought you a fan, that's different, you're notβ" he seemed to catch himself, some thought crossing his face he clearly hadn't meant to say out loud, and cleared his throat instead. "Anyway. We should keep moving. Overlook's still a few hours off, and I'd like to actually get you there with enough daylight to see the view properly."
You let him change the subject, mostly because you weren't sure you were ready either to examine what he'd almost said, but you tucked the fan carefully into your sleeve, next to Kono, who eyed it with mild suspicion before apparently deciding it posed no threat to his position and settling back down.
The two of you left the village with Woojoo laden down, somewhat improbably, with a small sack of persimmons Martin had also boughtβ"for the horse," he'd said, unconvincingly, though you both knew perfectly well who was going to end up eating most of themβand walked the rest of the morning in an easy, comfortable quiet, broken only occasionally by Martin pointing out landmarks, or you asking questions about the world that he answered, more and more, without any of the teasing he'd led with the day before.
"Can I ask you something," you said, somewhere around midday, watching the road unspool ahead of you toward hills that were, slowly, beginning to look less like mountains and more like the gentler rise of land near a coast.
"You keep asking me that like I have a choice."
"Why haven't you left? You could've, a dozen times by now. You've got your satchel, you've got a truce with Woojoo, you could've slipped off in the night and I'd never have caught you."
He was quiet for a moment, watching the road rather than you. "I've thought about it."
"And?"
"And I keep not doing it," he said, simply, like the answer surprised him as much as it seemed to surprise you. "Which is new. Historically I'm very good at leaving. It's sort of my whole thing. Get in, get what I need, get out before anyone gets attached, especially me." He glanced sideways at you, something wry and a little helpless in it. "You're making that considerably more difficult than usual, gongju."
You didn't have a response for thatβnot one you trusted yourself to say out loud, anywayβso you reached over instead and took his hand, the way you had at the tunnel's mouth, easy and instinctive, and he let you, lacing his fingers through yours without missing a step, and the two of you walked the rest of the afternoon that way, hands linked, saying nothing else about it at all.
You reached the overlook above the harbor just as the sun was beginning its long slide toward the water, the whole kingdom spread out below you in a way you'd only ever seen painted, and painted badly, from your own imaginationβthe palace roofs catching the last light, the sea beyond the harbor gone molten copper, boats coming in for evening with their sails full and orange.
"There it is," Martin said, quieter than you'd heard him yet, standing close beside you at the edge of the outlook. "Home of your mysterious lantern people."
You didn't answer right away. You were looking at the palaceβthe actual palace, not the vague shape you'd always imagined from your tower window, but real, close enough now to make out individual roof tiles, individual windows catching fire in the sunsetβand something in your chest was doing something you didn't entirely have language for. A pull. An ache, low and old, like a bruise you hadn't known was there until someone pressed it.
"You okay?" Martin asked.
"I don't know," you said, honestly. "It feels likeβ" you struggled for it, and gave up trying to find the exact shape of the feeling, settling instead for the closest true thing you had. "It feels like coming home to a place I've never been."
He was quiet for a moment, watching you rather than the view.
"In all honesty," he said, "I think you're going to like it there. Whatever it turns out to be, wherever it turns out you're from. I think the whole world's better with you loose in it, gongju. Bowl and all."
You looked at him with the last of the sunset gold across his face, that ridiculous, sincere, unguarded expression he clearly hadn't meant to let you seeβand you thought about tunnels and rivers and burnt rabbit and a hanok full of strangers singing about his teeth, and you thought, with the same clarity you'd had at the mouth of that tunnel two nights ago: this. I want this. Whatever this is turning into, I want it.
"Come on," you said instead, because you weren't brave enough yet to say the other thing, and reached for his hand, lacing your fingers through his like it was the easiest, most obvious motion in the world. "There's a boat down there with our name on it. I have a light show to see."
Below you, the first lanterns of the evening were already beginning to lift off the water, small and gold and multiplying, rising slow and steady into a sky gone the deep, glowing blue of early darkβand somewhere out past the harbor, thousands more were waiting to join them, waiting, though you didn't know it yet, for you.
Martin's hand tightened around yours.
"After you, princess," he said, and the two of you started down the hill together, toward the water, toward the light.
The boat Martin foundβborrowed, he insisted, with a straight face that fooled absolutely no one, from a dock crowded with a dozen identical little wooden craft, all of them clearly rented out for exactly this evening, exactly this purposeβwas small and low and smelled faintly of fish, and rocked alarmingly when you first climbed in, enough that you grabbed for his arm and he grabbed for the side of the boat and Kono, riding in your collar, made a noise of profound and specific betrayal at being jostled.
"Careful," Martin said, steadying you with a hand at your waist that lingered maybe half a second longer than strictly necessary, and you were fairly sure, from the way his ears had gone slightly pink, that he'd noticed it too.
Woojoo, denied entry to the boat on account of being an entire horse, watched the proceedings from the dock with an expression of deep personal injury, and had to be bribed with the promise of an extra ration of feed before he'd agree to wait, tail swishing, ears pinned, radiating the specific fury of a creature left behind on the one night that mattered.
"He'll forgive you eventually," you said, as Martin pushed off from the dock with a long oar, the little boat gliding out onto water gone glassy and still with the coming dark.
"He has never forgiven me for anything in his entire life. I stole an apple from his feed bag once, two years ago, and I am fairly sure he still brings it up in whatever passes for a horse's internal monologue."
"Poetic justice."
"You're supposed to be on my side."
"I'm on Kono's side. And apparently Woojoo's. You seem to have accumulated a great many enemies for one man."
"They're not enemies," Martin said, settling the oar and letting the boat drift, "they'reβcreatures with very high standards who happen to have chosen me as their personal project. It's a compliment, really, if you think about it correctly."
"I don't think that's what a compliment is."
"You'll come around."
The kingdom had gone properly dark behind you now, the palace a black shape against a sky just beginning to prickle with stars, and the harbor water held every scattered lantern-light in perfect, trembling reflection, so that it felt, floating there, like you were suspended between two skiesβone above, one below, and you in the exact still center of both.
"It's almost time," you said, quiet, watching the palace. Something in your chest had gone tight and expectant, the same old ache from the overlook, except closer now, close enough that you thought you might be able to name it if you sat with it a little longer.
Martin didn't say anything. He'd gone still too, watching you rather than the palace, in a way you were becoming increasingly, helplessly aware of.
And then the first note soundedβa low horn, from somewhere within the palace walls, carrying clean and mournful across the waterβand the sky above the towers began, all at once, to fill with gold.
all those days, watching from the windows
You had watched this exact sight, every year of your life, from a single round window a mile up a mountainside, small and distant and never once close enough to feel the heat of the paper or hear the soft rush of a thousand wicks catching flame at once. You had painted it, badly, from memory, over and over, never quite able to get the specific quality of the light right, the way it wasn't quite gold and wasn't quite orange but some living color in between, restless, warm, endlessly multiplying.
Nothing you had ever painted came close.
now i'm here, blinking in the starlight
now i'm here, suddenly i see
standing here
The lanterns rose in waves, not all at once but in long, cascading pulsesβa hundred, then another hundred, then more than you could count, drifting up from courtyards and rooftops and the decks of boats all across the harbor, joining together into a slow, vast river of light climbing the dark sky. The water around your little boat filled with their reflections until it was impossible to say, looking down, where the true lanterns ended and the false ones beganβgold above you, gold below you, and you sitting in the very middle of it with your breath caught somewhere behind your ribs.
"Oh," you said, which was not remotely adequate to the size of what you were feeling, but was all you had.
"Yeah," Martin said, softly, and when you looked over at him he wasn't watching the lanterns at all. He was watching you, your face lit gold and trembling with reflected light, your eyes wide and wet in a way you hadn't quite noticed until you felt the first tear slip free and had to laugh, embarrassed, wiping at it with the back of your wrist.
"I've waited my whole life for this."
"I know."
"I didn't even know what I was waiting for. I just knew that every year, this light showed up in the sky, and something in me hurt, every time, and I never understood why, and now I'm sitting here and I still don't fully understand why except that it feels likeβ" you struggled for it again, the same struggle as the overlook, except this time you didn't let yourself give up on finding the words.
and the world has somehow shifted.
"It feels like they were waiting for someone. And some enormous, stupid, hopeful part of me has always believed, without any evidence at all, that the someone was me."
Martin was quiet for a long moment, and when you glanced at him his expression had gone soft and unguarded in a way you'd only caught glimpses of beforeβat the campfire, at the mouth of the tunnel, never allowed to sit still on his face long enough for you to really look at it.
"For what it's worth," he said, "I think it probably was."
all at once, everything looks different... now that i see you.
Reaching into his satchel, he drew out two lanternsβsmall, folded flat, clearly purchased at some point during the walk down from the overlook, though you hadn't noticed him buying them, too absorbed in the viewβand passed one across to you, along with a little punk of glowing incense to light the wick.
"I got us our own," he said, almost shy about it, which did not suit him at all and which you found, helplessly, endearing anyway. "Figured you shouldn't have to just watch other people's."
Your hands weren't quite steady as you unfolded the paper frame and touched the flame to the wick, the lantern blooming gold between your palms, warm and alive, straining gently upward the way they all did, wanting badly to join the great river of light rising above you.
"Make a wish," Martin said. "Isn't that the tradition? Birthday girl gets a wish."
You looked at him, sharp. "I never told you it was my birthday."
He had the grace, at least, to look faintly caught out. "You didn't have to. Lost princess, mysterious lantern obsession, refuses to give her real name, gets misty over a light show that happens on one specific night of the yearβI put it together somewhere around the singing-bowl incident, honestly."
"You've known this whole time."
"I've suspected this whole time. There's a difference. I was being polite about it."
"You've been calling me gongju for two days as a joke."
"I've been calling you gongju for two days because I was fairly confident, and also because it made you make that specific face you're making right now, which I happen to enjoy a great deal." He nodded down at the lantern cupped in your hands, steering neatly away from the moment before you could examine it too closely. "Make your wish, princess. Before it burns your fingers."
You held the lantern a moment longer, warm light spilling up between your hands onto your face, and thoughtβnot about the kingdom below, not even about the parents you didn't yet know you had, waiting somewhere in that dark palace with a hope they'd never once let themselves fully abandon. But about the man sitting across from you in a stolen boat, teeth genuinely, infuriatingly perfect, watching you like you were the only light on the entire water worth looking at.
You didn't say the wish out loud. But you let it go anyway, watched it rise and catch the current of wind that carried it up to join the thousands of others, and when you looked back down, Martin was still watching you, close enough now that you could count, if you'd wanted to, every one of his eyelashes.
"Your turn," you said, a little breathless.
He lit his own lantern, let it rise, and didn't look away from you while he did itβno smolder this time, none of the careful, practiced charm from the campfire that had made you laugh at him. Just him, looking at you, plain and raw and slightly disbelieving of his own luck Like a man who'd broken into a random tower to hide from two very angry brothers and found, instead of an empty room, the entire rest of his life.
"I'm not going to tell you what I wished for," he said, "but I will say it involves considerably less running from armed men than my last several wishes."
"That's a low bar."
"I'm a man of variety."
You laughedβyou couldn't help it, the sound coming out watery and warmβand somewhere in the laugh, without either of you quite deciding to, the space between you closed, his hand finding yours again in the bottom of the boat, and you found yourself leaning in, slow, the way the whole evening had been slow and inevitable since the moment he tumbled through your window, and he leaned in too, and for one full suspended second, gold light drifting down all around you like something out of a legend, you thoughtβthis. This is the thing I've been aching for every single year I watched it from too far away.
Kono chose that exact moment to launch himself, with great personal indignation, off your shoulder and directly onto the bridge of Martin's nose.
"Owβ" Martin reeled back, more startled than hurt, batting uselessly at the small dragon now clinging to his face with all four clawed feet and radiating profound betrayal. "Your dragon justβhe attacked me, did you see that, he full-onβ"
"He's protective," you said, laughing so hard you had to hold the sides of the boat to keep from tipping, tears mixing with the ones already on your face, watching Kono glare down at Martin from the very tip of his nose like a small, furious guardian spirit who had absolutely no intention of allowing anything interesting to happen without express supervision.
"He is feral, is what he isβ"
"He likes you," you said, wiping your eyes, still laughing. "This is how he shows it. Trust me. If he actually hated you, you'd know."
"This does not feel like liking, this feels like an assassination attemptβ"
Kono flicked his tail, unbothered, and settled himself with great satisfaction directly between the two of you on the boat's narrow bench, clearly intending to remain there for the foreseeable future, a small, smug, iridescent chaperone against a sky still falling gold, lantern light rippling gently across the water in every direction, thousands of tiny floating wishes drifting home at last to a girl who'd spent eighteen years wondering, in the quiet dark of a tower window, whether anyone out there was waiting for her.
They had been. All along. And now, impossibly, so was he.
You looked at Martin over the top of Kono's indignant, iridescent head, both of you still laughing, both of you still close enough to feel the warmth radiating off each other in the cooling night air, and you thought that whatever happened next. Whatever the palace held, whatever answers waited for you at the bottom of that harbor, whatever Mother would do when she finally caught up to you, because you had no illusions that she wouldn'tβthis part, right here, the boat and the gold light and the ridiculous, wounded dragon and the ridiculous, wonderful man across from you, was a part you were never, ever going to forget.
"Happy birthday, gongju," Martin said, quiet, over the top of a still-hissing Kono, and you thought, looking at him, that for the first time in your entire life, you actually believed it.
Laterβmuch later, after the last of the lanterns had burned low and drifted, spent, back down toward the water, after Woojoo had forgiven you both just enough to let Martin scratch behind his ears without incident, after Kono had finally abandoned his post between you to curl up, smug and victorious, in the fold of your sleeveβyou rowed the little boat back toward shore in a silence that wasn't empty at all. It was full instead of everything neither of you had quite said yet, the two of you sitting close enough that your knees kept knocking together with every small motion of the water.
You didn't know yet what waited for you at the top of that hillβwhat the palace would say when a girl with hair like sunlight walked through its gates for the first time in eighteen years, what Mother would do when she finally caught up to the two of you, what it would cost, in the end, to keep any of this. You only knew that you didn't want the night to be over, that some small, stubborn, hopeful part of you had already decided, somewhere between the singing bowl and the lantern light, that whatever came next, you wanted to face it with your hand in his.
"What happens now?" you asked, quiet, as the shore came slowly closer, torchlight from the docks beginning to flicker gold across the water to meet you.
Martin was quiet for a moment, considering the question with more weight than his usual answers ever carried.
"I don't know," he admitted, finally. "I've never actually planned past the running-away part before. Usually there isn't a now. There's just the next place to be, and the next, and I never stick around long enough to find out what comes after."
"And this time?"
He looked at you, truly and deeply gazed. It was the way he had at the overlook, at the tunnel's mouth, at every unguarded moment he'd let slip through the cracks of his own careful charm over the past four daysβand something in his face settled, like a decision he'd already made without quite admitting it to himself.
"This time," he hummed, "I think I'd like to find out."
The boat bumped gently against the dock, and somewhere above you, one last, late lantern rose alone into the dark, gold and small and stubborn, chasing after all the others that had gone before itβand you thought, watching it go, that it looked exactly like hope.
Morning came in gray and soft, mist lying low over the harbor the way it did most mornings this close to the water, and you woke tucked against the base of a fishing boat with Kono curled warm against your throat and Martin already awake beside you, satchel across his shoulder, watching the fog with an expression you didn't much care for.
"You're making a weird face," you said, sitting up, voice still thick with sleep. "This like... stiff, deciding-something face."
"I don't have a stiff, deciding-something face."
"You absolutely do. You had it right before you climbed through my window and you have it right now."
He exhaled, and some of the careful blankness dropped away, replaced by something more honestβnervous, almost, in a way that didn't suit him nearly as well as the sarcasm usually did. "I want to do this properly. Whatever this is turning into." He nodded down at the satchel, at the unmistakable shape of the crown inside it. "I know people who'll take this off my hands for real money, enough that neither of us has to run from anything ever again. I want to trade it, clean, and come back for you, and thenβI don't know. Figure out the rest. Together, if you'll have me."
"You could just give it back."
"I could," he agreed, "and normally I'd have laughed you out of the harbor for suggesting it. But I'm finding, lately, that a lot of things that used to make sense don't anymore, and a lot of things I never used to consider are starting to sound like exactly what I want." He reached out, tucked a loose strand of hair back from your face, unbearably gentle about it. "Wait for me here. I won't be long."
"You'd better not be."
"Princess." He said it soft, like a promise rather than a joke, and pressed one quick, warm kiss to your forehead before you could think of anything clever enough to say back. "I'll be back before the fog burns off. I swear it."
You watched him go, satchel bouncing against his hip, Woojoo trailing reluctantly after him with the particular resigned loyalty of a creature who'd decided, against every instinct, to trust his rider one more timeβand you sat there on the damp dock with Kono in your lap, watching the mist swallow him up, and told yourself, firmly, that the ache in your chest was nothing. Just morning cold. Just nerves. Nothing at all like fear.
The fog thickened instead of burning off, and the longer you waited the worse the ache in your chest got, until you couldn't sit still any longer and started pacing the dock's edge, Kono clinging tight to your shoulder, both of you straining to hear anything at all beyond the slow slap of water against the pilings.
You heard voices first. They were low and harsh, more than one man, coming from somewhere off along the tree line past the last of the boatsβand against every ounce of good sense you had left, you went toward them instead of away.
You found the clearing just past the fog's thickest bank, and what you found there stopped your heart cold: Martin on his knees in the mud, satchel gone, two enormous men standing over himβone you'd recognize instantly from the way Martin had gone rigid at the mere mention of them days ago, though you'd never learned their names until this moment.
Sunghoon. Jay. Buff, scarred, furious, and entirely unbothered by the fact that Martin was bleeding from a split lip and still trying, uselessly, to talk his way out.
"You cut us out," Sunghoon was saying, low and dangerous. "Two years of work, and you cut us out for a girl."
"It wasn't like thatβ"
"Save it." Jay's boot connected with Martin's ribs, and you had to bite down hard on your own hand to keep from crying out. "We'll take the crown. And we'll take the reward for you too. Two birds."
And then, from somewhere behind them, a voice you knew better than your own heartbeat, cool and pleasant and utterly without mercy.
"Gentlemen," Mother said, stepping out of the mist like she'd been waiting there all along, "I believe I can make this considerably more profitable for everyone involved."
You didn't understand, in the moment, what you were watchingβonly that Mother produced a small purse of coin, that Sunghoon and Jay's fury seemed to shift, calculating, weighing a better offer, that Martin's face went from pained to something close to horrified the second he understood what was happening.
"Don't," he said, to Mother, voice raw. "Whatever you're planningβleave her out of it. She doesn't have to be part of this."
"She has always been part of this," Mother said, almost gently, crouching down to his level with the particular tenderness she'd once reserved, you realized with a sick lurch, entirely for you. "You simply made the mistake of thinking you'd earned a say in it."
You didn't see exactly what happened nextβa scuffle, Martin shouting your name once, sharp and desperate, before something struck him and the sound cut offβbecause Mother had already turned, unerringly, toward the tree line where you stood frozen, and her eyes found yours through the fog with a precision that told you she'd known exactly where you were the entire time.
"There you are," she said, soft, and something about the softness was so much worse than the fury from the hanok. "Come along, darling. I think it's well past time we had a talk."
You ran. You didn't get far.
By the time the fog burned off, you were sitting in the belly of a small, windowless room that smelled of salt and old ropeβnot the tower, you understood dimly, some hidden place along the coast Mother had clearly kept in reserve for exactly this kind of contingencyβwrists bound loosely, more out of formality than real restraint, because Mother had never needed rope to keep you where she wanted you. She'd only ever needed your own heart, turned carefully against itself.
"He left, you know," she said, arranging herself on the room's single stool with the composure of a woman discussing the weather. "The moment those men offered him a way out, he took it. The crown. The reward money for turning you in besides, I'd imagineβa tidy sum for very little effort." She sighed, and it might almost have sounded sympathetic, if you hadn't spent eighteen years learning exactly how much genuine feeling lived underneath that particular sigh. "I saw the ship myself. Sailing out with the morning tide. I'm so sorry, darling. I did try to warn you what the world was like."
"You're lying."
"Am I?" She tilted her head, and something flickered behind her eyesβnot doubt, never doubt, but the faint, familiar satisfaction of a woman watching a plan click neatly into place. "You've known him four days. I've kept you safe for eighteen years. Which of us, do you truly think, has earned your trust?"
You wanted, badly, to believe it was a lieβevery instinct in your chest screamed that it wasβand yet some old, deep, tower-shaped part of you, the part that had spent a lifetime being told the world was cruel and that Mother alone could be counted on, curled up small and aching and terribly, terribly willing to believe her anyway. That was the cruelest part of it. Not the lie itself, but how easily, after everything, it still found purchase.
"I want to go home," Mother said, standing, brushing invisible dust from her skirts. "Not the towerβsomewhere new, somewhere he'll never think to look, somewhere I can keep you properly this time. You'll thank me for it, eventually. You always do."
You didn't answer. You sat very still in the dim, salt-smelling dark, and thought about a boat full of lantern light, and a man who'd bought you a fan for no reason at all, and a dragon who'd bitten his nose out of pure, ridiculous devotionβand something in you, quiet but absolutely unshakeable, refused, even now, even with the doubt gnawing at your ribs, to fully believe the story Mother was selling.
Martin woke in a cell.
His head throbbed, his ribs ached with every breath, and it took him several long, disoriented minutes to piece together that the last thing he rememberedβMother's voice, your name torn out of his throat, the world going darkβhad apparently ended with him here, iron bars, straw floor, and a guard outside who addressed him, with unmistakable relish, by the exact reward figure printed on his wanted poster.
"They're saying you kidnapped a girl," the guard said, almost cheerful about it. "Some noble's daughter. Word is the hanging's set for sundown. Shame about the teeth, by the wayβheard the sketch was more flattering than the real thing."
"I did not kidnap anyone," Martin gritted, with the flat, exhausted fury of a man repeating himself for the fifth time, "and my teeth are fineβ" and then stopped, because none of that mattered even slightly next to the one thought currently eclipsing everything else in his skull: she thinks I left her.
He didn't remember much of what happened after thatβonly that somewhere past midnight, a small, furious, iridescent shape came skittering through the cell's single high window, having tracked him across half the coastline on nothing but sheer stubborn will. Not long after, the cell door groaned open from the outside to reveal Namjoon's enormous, grinning face, flanked by the twins, the man with the weasel, and, filling the corridor behind them with visible, righteous indignation, one extremely large, extremely unimpressed horse.
"Heard you got yourself in trouble," Namjoon said. "Figured we'd come see if the rumors about your teeth were the only thing worth breaking you out for."
"I could kiss every single one of you," Martin said, already moving.
"Please don't," said one of the twins, Juhoon. "We heard about the fisherman's wife."
He found you by the coast road at dusk, Mother's carriage rattling ahead through the last of the fading light, and there was no time for a plan, no time for anything except Woojoo breaking into a dead run with Martin bent low over his neck and Kono clinging, white-knuckled, to his collar, the whole ragged, impossible rescue party thundering after a carriage carrying away the only thing that had ever made the running feel like it was going somewhere.
He caught them at the cliff road, where the trees gave way to open sky and the sea spread out gray and endless below, and Mother, seeing him, didn't so much as flinch.
"Persistent," she said, stepping down from the carriage alone, something cold and final settling into her face. "I did wonder if you'd manage it."
"Let her go."
"She's not yours to demand things about." Mother's eyes flicked past him, to where you'd appeared in the carriage doorway. His wrists finally free, staring at Martin like you couldn't quite trust the sight of himβbruised, breathless, undeniably, impossibly there. "Tell him, darling. Tell him what you told me. That you understand now. That the world outside only ever takes."
"I told you I didn't believe you," you said, voice shaking but clear, stepping down onto the road. "I still don't."
Something in Mother's composure cracked, just slightly, just enough. "You would choose him. After everything I've given you. Everything I've sacrificed."
"You didn't give me anything," you said, and the words came out steadier than you felt, eighteen years of swallowed truth finally finding air. "You took me. There's a difference. I've only just learned it, but I've learned it completely."
What happened next happened fast, and badly, the way real danger always doesβMother lunging, a blade you hadn't seen catching the last of the light, Martin throwing himself between the two of you with no more thought than he'd given anything else reckless and right over the past four days, and then the sharp, terrible sound of metal finding flesh, and Martin going down hard onto the cliff road with blood already spreading dark across his side.
"Martinβ"
"I'm fine," he said, which was so obviously, catastrophically untrue that you didn't even bother arguing, dropping to your knees beside him, hands already pressing hard against the wound, some old instinct screaming at you to sing, sing the old words, the ones Mother used every time she needed the magic, and you opened your mouth to do exactly thatβ
"Don't," Martin said, gripping your wrist with what strength he had left, eyes finding yours through the pain with a clarity that cut straight through everything else. "If you do thatβif you use it nowβshe'll never let either of us go. Not really. Not ever. She'll just keep finding a reason to need you broken enough to fix."
"I can't just let youβ"
"You can," he said, "trust me, princess, pleaseβ" and reached, with the last of his strength, for the small blade at his own belt, the one he'd used to fillet fish and cut rope and once, memorably, threaten a very rude tax collector, and before you fully understood what he meant to do, he'd taken hold of your long braid and cut, clean through, several feet of gold-shot hair falling away into the dirt at once, severed for good.
The change was immediate and terrible. The cut length dulled from gold to something ordinary and plain even as it fell, and Motherβmid-motion, reaching for you, for the hair, for the magic she'd spent a hundred years stealingβmade a sound you would never, for the rest of your life, be able to fully forget.
Her hands went first, skin creasing and thinning before your eyes, decades collapsing into her all at once, unstoppable now that the last thread keeping her young had been severed for good.
She staggered back toward the cliff's edge, aged a hundred years in the space of ten seconds, and the wind off the sea did the rest, catching what was left of her and scattering it, gray and weightless, out over the water until there was nothing left standing on the road at all.
You didn't watch it finish. You were already turned back to Martin, hands shaking, pressing uselessly against a wound that wasn't healing, that had no reason left to heal, because the magic that could have done it lay scattered in cut hair and ash somewhere behind you.
"Hey," Martin said, voice going thin, "heyβdon't do that face, the face you're doingβ"
"Don't you dare," you said, furious and breaking all at once. "Don't you dare talk to me about faces right nowβ"
"I'd do it again," he said, eyes already starting to lose their focus, "every time, exactly the same, I just want you to know that, in case I don't get toβ"
"You're not finishing that sentence."
He smiled anyway, small and lopsided, teeth perfectly, infuriatingly straight even now, and his eyes slid shut.
You didn't remember deciding to cry. You only remembered the tears coming, hot and helpless, one falling from your cheek straight onto the wound at his sideβand the low, golden hum that followed, faint but unmistakable, the last living echo of magic that had never fully left you even with the hair gone, because it had never really lived in the hair at all. It had always been in you.
The wound closed. Color came back into his face all at once, like a held breath finally released, and his eyes opened, blinking up at you in dazed, disbelieving confusion.
"You're supposed to be dead," you told him, half laughing, half sobbing, hands still shaking as you cradled his face.
"Rude," he said, voice cracked but unmistakably, wonderfully himself, "extremely rude, waking a man up just to insult himβ"
You didn't let him finish that sentence.
You kissed him before you'd fully decided to, both hands still fisted in the collar of his shirt where you'd been holding him together only seconds before, and it wasn't gentle β you didn't have gentle left in you, not after watching the color drain out of his face, not after the terrible, endless second where you'd genuinely believed you were about to lose him on a cliff road with the sea crashing below and no way left to fix it. It was too much all at once, everything you hadn't let yourself say out loud over four impossible days crashing out through your mouth against his instead β the fear, still shaking through your hands where they'd found his jaw; the relief, hot and overwhelming, closing your throat; the something else underneath both of those that you'd been carefully not naming since the moment he tumbled through your window and hadn't stopped, apparently, not even once, not even now.
Martin made a low, startled sound against your mouth β surprise, mostly, and then something that wasn't surprise at all β and his hand came up to cradle the back of your head, careful even now, even freshly healed and half out of his mind with everything that had just happened, fingers threading into what was left of your hair like he needed the proof of it, needed to know you were real and warm and still here under his hands. You felt him breathe out, shaky, against you, felt the last of the tension bleed out of his shoulders the way it never quite had, not fully, not once in the entire time you'd known him.
"You scared me," you said, when you finally, barely, pulled back far enough to speak, forehead pressed to his, both of you still breathing like you'd run the whole cliff road twice over. "YouΒ scaredΒ me, don't you dare ever do that againβ"
"No promises," he murmured, and you could feel him smiling against your mouth, that same infuriating, undimmed confidence creeping back in even now, even bloodied, even seconds from death and back again. "Apparently I throw myself in front of knives for you now. New personality trait. Very inconvenient."
"Martin."
"I mean it, though." His thumb traced along your jaw, slow, and when you met his eyes there was nothing left of the joke in them at all, just something steady and stripped bare, more honest than anything he'd let you see across four days of careful, practiced charm. "I'd do it again. Every single time, exactly the same, no hesitation, and I need you to actually hear that, not just β not just as something I say to be dramatic on a cliff. I mean it."
"I heard you the first time. Right before you nearly died proving it."
"Poor timing, historically my specialty," he agreed, and kissed you again before you could argue, slower this time, both of you steadier now, no longer shaking quite so hard, just close and warm and unwilling, for a long moment, to be anything but exactly where you wereβhis hand still tangled in your hair, yours still fisted in his ruined, blood-stained shirt, the whole world narrowed down to the small distance between your mouths and the specific, dizzying fact that he was alive to kiss you back.
Somewhere nearby, Kono shrieked with pure, unrestrained delight, launching himself in a small iridescent blur to land on Martin's shoulder and chirp something that sounded, for the first time in their entire acquaintance, like approval rather than threat.
Woojoo, standing a few respectful paces off, huffed out a long breath through his nose and, for once in his entire life, looked almost pleased about something Martin had doneβears forward, head tossed once as if in reluctant, grudging blessing, the closest thing to a truce he'd ever offered.
You laughed, breathless and wet-eyed, breaking the kiss just far enough to rest your forehead against his again. "Even Kono's happy. Do you understand how significant that is? He's never once been happy about you."
"I earned it," Martin said, hoarse, still smiling like he couldn't quite stop. "Nearly dying for you apparently buys a man some goodwill, even from a judgmental little dragon who's hated me since the moment I fell through a window."
"Don't get used to it."
"Too late," he said, and pulled you back in before you could answer, no urgency left in it now, just something slow and certain and entirely unhurried, the two of you kissing on a cliff road at dawn like you had all the time in the world left to spend exactly like this.
The palace gates opened at dawn to a girl with short, plain, ordinary hair and a face the king recognized, the moment he saw it. With a certainty that needed no proof at allβsome things a parent simply knows, in the body, before the mind has caught up to explaining why.
The queen reached you first, running down the palace steps in a way queens were certainly not supposed to run, and you didn't need eighteen years of stolen memory to understand, the instant her arms closed around you, exactly what you'd been missing every single night you'd watched those lanterns from too far away.
There was a great deal to explain, afterβa kingdom's worth of grief to untangle. A name to relearn that had been yours all along, a wanted man's record to quietly, thoroughly clear, which the king accomplished within the hour with the particular efficiency of a father who had just gotten his daughter back and had no patience left for bureaucratic nonsense.
Martin stood through most of it looking deeply, uncharacteristically nervous, hands shoved in his pockets, until the king finally turned to him and said, simply, "You brought her home," and something in Martin's whole posture eased for what looked like the first time in his entire life.
Kono took up permanent residence on the windowsill of your new rooms, deeply unimpressed by the palace's excessive number of servants and considerably more impressed by the quality of the kitchen scraps. Woojoo was given, over Martin's strenuous objections, an official post as a royal guard's mount, a position he apparently found so satisfying that his campaign of vengeful boot-stepping slowed, within a few months, to something almost like fondness.
Namjoon and the rest of the hanok's strange, loyal patrons were invited, formally, to the palace for the next year's lantern festival, and caused, by every account, an enormous and thoroughly enjoyable scandal.
And every year after that, on the anniversary of the night a stranger fell through a tower window and a girl hit him with a singing bowl, the two of you took a small boat out onto the harbor when the lanterns rose. They were gold and endless, filling the sky the way they always hadβexcept now, for the first time in either of your lives, you watched them from exactly where you were always meant to be.
"Happy anniversary, my gongju," Martin said, every single year, and every single year, you believed him a little more.
if she's here
it's crystal clear
i'm where i'm meant to go
pairing. flynn rider ! martin / f ! rapunzel reader
warnings + info. oneshot, fantasy au, tangled retelling, strangers to lovers, not exactly parallel to the movie so don't be confused if some things are different, kissing, violence, imagine messyhaired!tin ok?, features many people you know and love ;)
synopsis. a handsome thief hiding from his crimes picks the wrong tower to climb into, and the girl locked inside it has been waiting her whole life for an excuse to leave.
wc. 18.3k
maddy's note. i marinated on this idea for ages and finally it has come to fruition so i cannot wait for u guys to read it π! ik my martin girls are heavily deprived so this ones for u guys hehehe but especially for meri @griinspire and pearl @marsgirltyshi and lili @chocom0ka (and seulbi but she's Gone off blr) because no one does martins gf like they do ππ!!!
there is no playlist for this because, well, it has a soundtrack of its own and quite frankly i'm a little lazy to compile songs rn............. #iseethelighttruther
tagging 90% of Core15 bc they yell at me @kaikaikoi @hyuneskkami @hollyoongs @aerinettes
Once upon a time, in a kingdom nestled between green mountains and a sea the color of jade, there was born a princess.
Of course, like any other fairytale, she was not born ordinary. On the night before her birth, a single drop of moonlight was said to have fallen from the sky and rooted itself into the earth, blooming into a flower that glowed gold from root to petal. The palace healers, desperate to save the queen who lay dying in childbed, ground the flower into a tea and poured it past her lips, and by morning the queen lived, and by evening the princess was born with a single lock of hair that shone like sunlight caught in silk.
The kingdom rang bells for three days. The king wept. The people lit lanterns and floated them on the river in thanks to whatever gods had seen fit to spare their queen and gift them a princess who glowed.
But the flower's magic had not vanished when it was boiled into tea. It had simply movedβinto the girl. Into her hair, which did not merely shine but healed, which did not merely glow but sang low and golden when the right words were spoken over it, undoing wounds, softening age, drawing sickness out of the body like poison from a wound.
There was a woman in the kingdomβnever young, never quite old, a woman the years seemed to slide off of like water off stoneβwho had known about the flower long before the healers ever found it. She had kept it hidden for a hundred years, using its magic to keep herself exactly as she wished to remain. When it was taken from her and given to a queen and consumed by a birth she had no part of, something in her curdled.
She was called, by then, only Mother.
She came for the princess on a night when the moon was new and the palace slept heavy with relief. She did not take the flower. She took the girl instead, because the girl was the flower now, and she carried her from the palace in the dark and up into the mountains, to a tower with no door, only a single window round as an eye, hidden behind a curtain of waterfall and stone.
She raised the princess as her own. She told her that the world outside was full of people who would tear her apart for the power in her hair, that the tower was the only place she would ever be safe, that Mother's loveβsharp-edged and conditional and always, always followed by but you know I only want what's best for youβwas the only love the girl would ever need.
The king and queen sent lanterns into the sky every year on their daughter's birthday, thousands of them, gold as the flower that had saved the queen's life, in the small and stubborn hope that somewhere, somehow, their daughter would see them and know she was being waited for.
The girl in the tower saw them. Every year, from her window, she watched the far-off sky fill with floating light and never once knew they were for her.
She only knew that something in her chest ached every time the horizon lit up gold, and she never could explain why.
The king and queen never stopped hoping. Every year, when the lanterns had all burned low and drifted back down to the water, the queen would stand alone at the highest window of the palace a while longer than anyone else, watching the dark where the last of the light had gone, and the king would come find her there, and neither of them would say anything at all, because there was nothing left to say that eighteen years of the same silent vigil hadn't already said a hundred times over. They kept her room exactly as it had been. They never once let themselves call it a memorial, because a memorial was for something that was over, and they had never once let themselves believe it was over.
The kingdom, for its part, grew used to the grief the way kingdoms doβfolding it quietly into tradition, into the yearly ritual of light, into a story told to children at bedtime about a princess who might, one day, come home. Most had stopped truly expecting it. The lanterns kept rising anyway. Hope, it turned out, didn't require belief to keep going. It only required someone willing to light the wick one more time.
You had lived eighteen years in that tower, and in that time you had become, out of sheer boredom and stubbornness, extremely accomplished.
You could grind ink and paint mountains that looked like the ones you'd never climbed. You could play the gayageum until your fingers bled and then keep playing anyway. You'd taught yourself to read faster than Mother liked, to argue better than Mother liked, to want more than Mother liked, though you were careful never to let her see the wanting directly. You kept it folded small, tucked behind your ribs, brought out only at night with the shutters closed, when you traced the shapes of mountains you'd painted from imagination and wondered what they smelled like up close.
Kono did not approve of the wanting.
Kono was small, no longer than your forearm, built more like a lizard than the great serpentine dragons painted on temple ceilings, but for the two soft antler-like horns that curled back from his brow and the faint iridescent sheen to his scales that shifted blue to green to gold depending on how the light caught himβthe exact shifting, you'd always thought, of oil on water, or of a fish turning in a stream. He had a long tail he liked to wrap possessively around your wrist, small clawed feet that could grip silk without snagging it, and an expression, for a creature with no eyebrows, of near-constant and deeply personal disappointment in you.Β
He had been left on your windowsill as a hatchling the summer you turned nine, small and starving and furious about it, and had simply never left, and you had never really asked why a mountain temple's guardian creature had abandoned his post to live with a girl in a tower, and he had never told you.
He was, as far as you'd ever heard, meant to bring luck. You mostly found this funny.
"I'm just saying," you told him, that particular evening, standing at the window with your chin in your hands, watching the light change over the tree line, "that if I have to hear one more story about how the outside world is full of ruffians and cutthroats waiting specifically for me, I might actually go looking for the ruffians and cutthroats just to see if they're more interesting than staying here."
Kono made a small, unimpressed noise and flicked his tail against your neck.
"You're right, you're right. Bad plan." You sighed, and the sigh fogged faintly against the cool evening air. "But it's my birthday in three days, Kono. Eighteen years old, and I've never once stood in actual dirt. Do you know how insane that is?"
He blinked his round eyes at you, which you had long since learned to interpret as yes, obviously, I have been here the entire time, why are you telling me this like it's news.
You didn't get to finish making your case, because that was the exact moment something enormous and irritable and coated in mud came flying over the tree line, followed at some distance by two men on horseback who were shouting in a way that suggested this was not a friendly race.
You watched, chin still in your hands, as the fleeing shapeβa horse, you realized, a truly furious-looking horse with no riderβthundered off in one direction, and the men gave up the chase and doubled back toward the waterfall instead, toward the tower, toward the one place in this entire kingdom that was not supposed to be findable.
Kono went rigid against your shoulder.
You, if you were being fully honest with yourself, felt something in your chest that was not quite fear. It sat right alongside the fear, close enough to be mistaken for it, but it wasn't fear.
It was closer to finally.
His name, you would learnβthough not for several more extremely tense minutesβwas Martin Edwards, and he arrived through your window the way a cat arrives through a window: badly, loudly, and with absolutely no acknowledgment that he might be intruding.
He tumbled onto your floor in a graceless heap of limbs, dragging a satchel that clinked with something metal, and had approximately one and a half seconds to register that the tower he'd chosen at complete random to hide in was, in fact, occupied, before you brought the singing bowl down over his head with every ounce of strength eighteen years of restless boredom had built into your arms.
The bowl rang out, low and resonant, an actual musical note hanging in the air over the sound of him crumpling sideways into your dried-flower arrangement.
You stood over him, bowl still raised, breathing hard, and felt, for the first time in your entire life, genuinely and thoroughly alive.
He groaned. He was, you noted with some irritation, extremely tall even lying down, all long limbs folded wrong across your floor, and even unconscious his face had the specific, punchable quality of someone who had never once in his life doubted that he was the most charming person in any room he walked into.
Kono skittered down your arm to the floor and approached the stranger with the deep suspicion of a creature sizing up a rival. He sniffed once at Martin's outstretched hand, apparently found it lacking, and turned his back on it with as much dignity as a small dragon draped in mud-splattered iridescent scales could manage.
You dragged the intruderβwith considerable effort, and a truly staggering amount of complaining directed at Kono, who offered zero helpβinto your wardrobe, and shut the door, and sat down hard on your bed with your heart going like a struck drum.
Ruffians and cutthroats, you thought, a little hysterically. Right on schedule.
He woke up loud, which you supposed made sense, given everything else about him so far.
"βokay, okay, I'm awake, I'm awake, get theβ" He kicked the wardrobe door open with a force that sent your good winter coats sliding off their hooks and staggered out into the room with both hands raised, blinking against the lamplight, and then his eyes landed on you, standing across the room with the singing bowl held out in front of you like a shield, and something in his face actually, genuinely, lit up.
"Oh," he hummed. "Hello."
"Don't move," you said.
"I'm not moving." He did not stop moving. His eyes were doing a slow, assessing sweep of the roomβthe window, the wardrobe, you, the bowl, back to youβthat you didn't love the feeling of. "Nice place. Veryβcozy. Homey. Round. You don't get a lot of round rooms."
"I said don't move."
"I'm being extremely still." He took a single, deliberate step sideways, testing you, and you swung the bowl an inch closer to his skull, and he froze with both hands up again, and something that might have been the beginning of respect crossed his face. "Okay. Fair. Noted."
Up close, in better light, he was infuriatingly good-looking in a way you resented on principle. Tallβtaller than anyone had a right to be in a low-ceilinged tower room. This ruffian was blond in a country where you'd never once seen hair that color (not that youβd really seen any other existing humans).
He had this odd and loose, careless confidence that suggested he'd never had to work particularly hard for anything, including, apparently, avoiding capture, since two very large men had chased him halfway across a mountain and he still looked more amused than afraid.
"Who are you," you snarled, "and how did you find this tower?"
"Martin Edwards." He said it like it should mean something to you. When your expression didn't change, an emotion flickered across his faceβannoyance, maybe, or the specific wound of a man whose name usually did land. "You've truly never heard of me."
"I've never heard of anyone. I live in a tower."
"Right. Yes. Fair point, very fair, I did notice theβtower situation." He gestured vaguely at the room, the window, the general concept of your entire life. "Look, I didn't find this place, I was being chased, I saw a hole in a wall of rock, I went through the hole. This was not a planned visit. I have no interest in yourβtower. Your life. Any of it. I just need to lay low for a bit and then I will be very happy to climb right back out that window and never think about any of this again."
You considered him. You considered the satchel, which he'd dropped by the wardrobe door, and which had made a very specific metallic clinking sound when he fell.
"What's in the bag?"
His whole body changedβjust slightly, just for a second, a flicker of genuine alarm before the easy charm slid back over it like a curtain. "Nothing that concerns you."
"It's in my room."
"It's in my possession."
"You're in my tower."
"Okay, fine, guess thatβsβactually a decent point." He exhaled through his nose, glanced at the window, seemed to calculate something, and then said, with the air of a man laying down a very reasonable trump card: "Tell you what. You let me leave, quietly, no fuss, and I forget this entire evening ever happened. Bag included. Everyone wins."
You should have said yes. Laterβmuch later, with the wind in your hair and your heart still going too fast in your chestβyou would think about how easy it would have been to say yes, to open the window, to let him climb back out into the night and never know what you'd almost missed.
Instead you looked past him, out your one round window, at the darkening sky, and you thought about lanterns you'd never seen up close and mountains you'd only ever painted from guesswork, and you heard yourself say, "No."
He blinked. "No?"
"You're going to take me somewhere."
"I am not."
"There's a light show. Lanterns. Every year, on theβ" you almost said my birthday, and swallowed it, some old instinct telling you not to hand a stranger that particular thread to pull. "There's a light in the sky, every year, from the direction of the kingdom. I want to see it up close. You're going to take me, and then you can have your littleβ¦ bag back."
"You don't have my bag."
"I know where you left it," you said, which was true, and gestured with your chin at Kono, who had, in the general chaos, quietly and with great personal satisfaction dragged the satchel across the floor and was now sitting on top of it with the smug posture of a creature who understood exactly what leverage was.
Martin looked at the dragon. The dragon looked at Martin. Something passed between them that you didn't fully understand yet but would come, over the following days, to recognize as the opening shot of a genuinely long and deeply petty war.
"That thing is sitting on my satchel," Martin gasped, in the tone of a man who could not quite believe the indignity of his current situation.
"His name is Kono."
"I don't care what his name is, he is sitting on myβ"
"He's very protective," you said, not entirely truthfully, since Kono's motives had far more to do with spite than protection, but you weren't about to admit that. "So. Lanterns. Then your bag. Then you go wherever it is men with bags full of clinking things go."
Martin looked at you for a long moment. He truly looked, in a way that made you resist the urge to fold your arms over your chest, and then rubbed both hands down his face and groaned like a man who'd already lost an argument he hadn't realized he was having.
"You," he chuckled in what you assume to be sarcasm, "are going to be a problem."
"Probably," you agreed, and found, to your own surprise, that you were smiling.
"For the record," he added, already turning to inspect the window, testing the give of the shutter with one hand, "I don't actually do this. Escort duty. Tour guide. Whatever this is."
"You don't have much choice."
"I have plenty of choice, lady. I'm choosing to be gracious about a bad situation, there's a difference." He glanced back at you, something assessing in the look, like he was recalculating you from scratch now that the singing bowl had been lowered. "How far is this light show, anyway?"
"I don't actually know."
"You don'tβ" He closed his eyes briefly, the particular patience of a man doing math he didn't want to do. "You dragged me into a hostage negotiation for a destination you don't know the distance to."
"It's in the direction of the kingdom. I've watched it every year from the window. It can't be that far."
"'Can't be that far' has gotten men killed, you know."
"You'll live," you said, with far more confidence than you actually possessed, and went to go retrieve your good travelling shoes, leaving him standing by the window looking like a man reconsidering every choice that had led him to this particular evening.
You changed, too, while he waitedβout of the loose sleeping robes you'd been in when he'd fallen through your window and into the good hanbok you'd been saving, the one Mother had commissioned for a birthday you weren't allowed to leave the tower to celebrate.
Pale jeogori embroidered along the collar with thread the color of new leaves, the chima falling in soft, heavy folds you'd never actually walked any real distance in, sash tied the way you'd practiced a hundred times alone in front of a mirror with no one to see it.
It felt strange, dressing for a world you'd never been allowed into. It felt stranger still, catching your own reflection in the dark window glass, to think that you might actually look like you belonged there.
Were youβ¦ scared? No. Surely not. You wanted this. Itβs practically your lifeβs purpose. But what about Mother? She had kept you safe and protected from the evils of that world for all your life and wouldnβt this be taking that protection for granted?Β
"You're stalling," Martin called, from somewhere near the window.
"I'm preparing."
"You've re-tied that sash three times."
"It has to sit correctly or it'll come loose on the climb down."
"It's a piece of fabric, not a structural pillarβ"
"Do you want my help escaping or not?"
That, at least, bought you the silence you needed to finish, smoothing the last fold flat with hands that weren't quite steady, and when you finally turned around he'd gone quiet in a different way, something briefly, helplessly caught in his expression before he covered it with a cough and a very deliberate glance toward the window.
"Ready?" he asked.
"Ready," you said, and meant it more than you expected to.
Getting out of the tower took considerably longer than getting in, mostly because you insisted on doing it via the long braided rope of your own hairβwhich made Martin's expression do something complicated and slightly ill when you explained the general mechanics of your situationβand partly because you stopped four separate times on the way down to look at things. A bird. The particular texture of the moss on the tower's stone base. Your own hands, dirt-smudged for the first time in your life, which you held up in the fading light like they belonged to someone else.
"You're doing something weird with your face," Martin said, from where he was waiting with visibly diminishing patience at the base of the waterfall.
"What thing."
"Theβ" he gestured at your entire self, "βwide-eyed newborn puppy thing. It's very slow."
"I've never touched a river before."
"You've touched water before."
"Not river water. It's cold. It's moving. Did you know it does that? Justβmoves, constantly, going somewhereβ"
"Incredible information. Truly a marvel of the natural world. Can weβ"
"Give me one more minute."
You did not give him one more minute. You gave him closer to ten, crouched at the edge of the water with your skirts hiked up and your bare feet in the current, laughingβactually laughing, a real sound you weren't sure you'd made before, not like this, not from somewhere this deepβwhile Martin stood a respectful distance away with his arms crossed and an expression that was trying very hard to stay annoyed and mostly failing.
"You know," he said, eventually, watching you, "for a girl who apparently thinks the entire world is trying to eat her alive, you're taking this remarkably well."
"I never said the world was trying to eat me."
"You have the exact energy of someone who was told that, yes."
You didn't answer that, because it was uncomfortably accurate, and instead climbed back up onto the bank and reached for the little cloth bag Mother had never let you leave without, purely out of habitβand then remembered you'd left the tower entirely, that Mother was three days out at her own errand, that there was no one to sneak anything past anymore, and the freedom of that thought hit you somewhere just under your ribs hard enough that you had to sit with it a second.
Martin was watching your face do something complicated.
"You okay, Princess?"
You blinked at him. "What did you call me?"
"Princess." He shrugged easily, like he'd been waiting for an excuse. "Means gongju. You know. Lost girl, hidden tower, guarded like she's made of something preciousβyou have to admit it tracks."
"I'm not a princess."
"I didn't say you were. I said it tracks." He was grinning now, delighted with himself in a way that made you want to throw something at him. "There's an actual missing princess, you know. Whole kingdom's been mourning her for eighteen years. Lanterns every year on her birthday, the whole thing. Iβm guessing thatβs what youβre trying to see. Funny coincidence, a girl locked in a tower wanting to see the exact same lanterns."
"Coincidences happen."
"Sure they do." He fell into step beside you, hands tucked behind his head, entirely too pleased with the theory he was clearly not going to let go of. "Or, alternatively, I could just call you 'princess.' Would you prefer that? Since you don't know what it means. I mean, I'm sure a sheltered young lady like yourself, freshly escaped from an entire lifetime in a stone tower, wouldn't be familiar with a word like that. Itβs English. Very obscure. Very advanced."
"I know what it means, I was born here, same as you."
"Do you though? Prove it."
"I'm not proving anything to you."
"Because you can't."
"Because it's beneath me."
"There it is," he said, snapping his fingers, delighted. "Gongju behavior if I've ever seen it."
"I will push you into the river."
"You're welcome to try, princess."
"You know what's funny," Martin said, a little while later, once you'd both fallen into an easier walking rhythm and the sun had dropped low enough to gild the tops of the trees. "You never actually told me your name."
You hesitated. It wasn't that you didn't have oneβMother had given you one, early, though she'd used it so rarely, always preferring darling or sweet girl or, when she was displeased, no name at all, just a long and pointed silenceβit was that saying it out loud to a stranger on your first night outside a tower felt like handing over something you weren't sure yet was safe to hand over.
"I'm not telling you."
"Why not?"
"Because you'll use it against me somehow. You seem like the type."
"I am offended." He didn't sound offended. He sounded thrilled, the way he sounded about most things that gave him new material to work with. "Fine. Keep your mystery. I'll just keep calling you gongju, then, and everyone we meet is going to assume you actually are the missing princess, and it'll be your fault when the whole kingdom starts a rumor."
"Nobody's going to believe that."
"You'd be surprised what people believe about a girl who climbs out of a tower on a rope made of her own hair."
You didn't have a good answer for that, mostly because it was, again, unfairly accurate, and you settled instead for shoving him lightly with your shoulder, which did nothing except make him laugh.
"Say it, then," you said. "Princess. If that's what you're going to call me, I want to actually hear you say the real word, not just the joke version."
He said itβproperly this time, no mockery in it, the vowels landing soft and familiar in a way that startled you a little, like hearing a song you hadn't realized you knew the words to.
"There," he said. "Happy?"
"You're still not calling me that."
"I'm absolutely calling you that. It's efficient. It's accurate, probably. And frankly," he added, glancing sideways at you with something almost gentle underneath the usual smugness, "it suits you better than whatever your actual name is going to turn out to be."
"You don't even know my actual name."
"I don't need to. I've got a working theory and I like it. A sheltered young lady," he said, drawing the words out with exaggerated care, "freshly liberated from a tower, apparently unfamiliar with basic Korean vocabularyβreally, it all fits."
"I am not unfamiliar with basicβ"
"Prove it. What's gongju mean, then, if you know it so well?"
"It means princess, and you know I know that, you're just being insufferable on purpose."
"On purpose and very successfully," he agreed, entirely too pleased with himself, and you gave up trying to win the argument and let yourself, instead, enjoy the specific, unfamiliar pleasure of being teased by someone who clearly wasn't trying to hurt you with it.
You did not push him into the river, mostly because you were fairly sure you'd fall in with him, but you thought about it, hard, the entire rest of the walk, while he hummed something tuneless and infuriating under his breath and Kono rode along in the fold of your sleeve making small disapproving noises every time Martin so much as glanced in your direction.
You noticed, though you weren't going to say it out loud, that he never actually stopped. Princess. Not once, the rest of that day, or the day after, or any of the days that came after that. It stuck the way nicknames only stick when the person using them has decided, somewhere below the joking, that they mean it.
The wanted poster was nailed to a tree at the first crossroads you came to, curling slightly at the corners from weather, and you might have walked right past it if Martin hadn't gone abruptly, suspiciously quiet beside you.
You looked. Then you looked again, closer, and had to physically bite down on the inside of your cheek to keep from laughing.
It was, unmistakably, himβsame jaw, same insufferable eyebrows, same general air of a man who thought quite highly of himselfβexcept that whoever had drawn it had rendered his mouth as a row of crooked, gap-toothed, wildly uneven teeth, snaggled in every direction like a fence that had lost a fight with a storm.
"That is not accurate," Martin yelled, very fast, snatching the poster down off the tree before you could get a proper look.
"That isβthat is artistic license, that is a hack sketch artist with a grudge and no talent, my teeth areβ" he actually opened his mouth to demonstrate, tilting his head back, and you had to admit, unwillingly, that his teeth were in fact very straight, surprisingly white, entirely unremarkable in the best possible way. "See? Perfect. Immaculate. I have never once in my life had a complaint about my teeth, I get compliments on my teethβ"
"From who?"
"Fromβpeople. Women. Discerning women with excellent taste who appreciate a goodβ"
"It says here you're a wanted thief," you hummed, reading over his shoulder now that he'd lowered the poster in his outrage, "with a reward ofβ" you did the math and had to stop and reread it, "βthat is a genuinely enormous amount of money."
"It's inflated. That's aβthat's a gross exaggeration of my worth, I'm not worth that much, this is clearly aβ"
"You're arguing that you're worth less than a wanted poster says?"
"I'm arguing that the number is inaccurate, there's a difference, the number is clearly designed to encourage overzealous bounty hunting, it's a scare tacticβ"
"So you agree you're worth stealing."
"That is notβthat is not what I said, you're twisting my words, this is exactly the kind of thing I was worried about when you insisted on coming along, you're going to misquote me to guards at some point and get us bothβ"
"I'm just reading what's written."
He scoffed and kicked a rock. "You're reading it with inflection."
"I'm reading it with my normal voice."
"You said 'genuinely enormous amount of money' like it was a personal insult to me specifically."
"You seem more upset about the teeth than the wanted part."
"Because the wanted part is accurate," he said, with the flat honesty of a man too distracted by dental slander to bother lying. "I am wanted. I did steal something. The teeth, though. The teeth are slander."
"What did you steal?"
He hesitatedβand it was the first genuinely unguarded pause you'd seen from him all dayβand then folded the poster into quarters and shoved it into his satchel with a little more force than necessary. "Doesn't matter. Ancient history. Water under the bridge."
"You stole it approximately six hours ago."
"Extremely ancient, in relative terms." He set off walking again, faster than before, and you had to jog a few steps to catch up, Kono digging tiny claws into your shoulder to keep his balance.
"You're not going to tell me."
"I am not."
"Is it the crown," you guessed, because you'd caught the edge of gold in the satchel earlier, glinting when Kono had dragged it across the floor, and you watched his shoulders go very slightly, very deliberately stiff.
"No," he said, in a tone that meant yes, and you decided, generously, to let him have it, mostly because you were far more interested in the actual horse that had just come thundering around the bend in the road, nostrils flaring, eyes locked on Martin with an expression of pure, personal, long-simmering rage.
"Oh, no," Martin said.
"Is thatβ"
"That is Woojoo, yes, that is my horse, that is a long, complicated relationshipβ"
Woojoo did not stop for pleasantries. He came at Martin like a man settling a debt, and the next several minutes dissolved into a genuinely spectacular chase around a small clearing that involved Martin climbing a tree, Woojoo standing guard at the base of said tree with the patient menace of a creature who had all the time in the world, and you sitting on a fallen log with Kono, watching, thoroughly entertained.
"He's not usually like this," Martin called down, from somewhere in the upper branches.
"He seems very consistent, actually."
"Okay, he's exactly like this, every time, it'sβwe have history, this horse and I, it's complicatedβ"
"He's a horse."
"He's vindictive, is what he is, he's been trying to get me arrested for two years, that's not normal horse behavior, that's a personal vendettaβ"
Kono made a small, delighted chattering noise beside you, which you were beginning to understand meant something close to finally, someone gets it, and when you glanced down at him he was watching Woojoo with what could only be described as newfound professional respect.
"What exactly did you do to him," you called up, watching Woojoo pace a slow, deliberate circle around the base of the tree, occasionally rearing to paw at the lowest branch just to remind Martin he had options.
"I didn't do anything, he's just been like this since I acquired him."
"You stole him."
"I acquired him. There's a nuance."
"From who?"
"From a royal stable, technically, but in my defense he was clearly unhappy there, high-strung, difficult, the stablemaster hated himβI did him a favor, honestly, and this is the thanks I get, two years of relentless, targeted footwear-based revengeβ"
Woojoo, as if personally offended by the retelling, reared up again with a furious whinny and got one hoof solidly against the trunk hard enough to shake the branch Martin was gripping, sending down a small shower of leaves and one extremely undignified yelp.
"He understood that," you gasped and shook your head. "He understood every word of that and he took offense."
"Horses don't understand language."
"This one might."
"This one is a menace, is what he is," Martin said, adjusting his grip with the particular caution of a man who had recently reconsidered his life choices, "a genuine menace who has decided, for reasons known only to himself, that his sole purpose on this earth is making my life difficultβ"
You decided, watching the standoff continue with no signs of resolving itself, that this was likely to go on for some time if left entirely to the two of them, and so you climbed down off your log, brushed off your skirts, and walked directly up to Woojoo with far more confidence than you actually felt.
He swung his great head toward you, ears pinned, nostrils flaring, and for a moment you thought you'd badly misjudged the situationβand then, slowly, his ears came up, and he leaned his head down toward you with something almost curious, blowing a warm breath across your palm when you held it out.
"There," you murmured. "See? I'm not the one who stole an apple from your feed bag."
"You heard about the apple thingβ" Martin's voice, muffled and betrayed, from somewhere above.
Woojoo made a low, satisfied sort of noise, nudging his nose against your shoulder, and you had the distinct impression, ridiculous as it was, that you had just been recruited onto a very specific and very committed team.
It took another twenty minutes, a great deal of undignified negotiating, andβeventuallyβyou stepping in to physically stand between horse and man with your hands raised in a gesture of peace, before Woojoo agreed, with visible reluctance, to a temporary truce, on the conditionβas far as you could interpret from a horse's expressionβthat he got to walk close enough to occasionally, "accidentally," step on the back of Martin's boot.
"This is humiliating," Martin muttered, as you all set off again, horse and dragon flanking either side of you like a pair of extremely judgmental honor guards.
"I think it's going great," you said, and meant it.
The hanok appeared out of the trees just as the light was going properly gray, low and wide-roofed in the old style, warm lantern-light spilling from its paper windows, smoke curling from a chimney with the smell of something roasting.
"Absolutely not," Martin said, the second he clocked it. "No. We're walking past this. This is a place I have specifically, personally, at great cost, learned to walk past."
"Why?"
"Because it's full of the single worst collection of degenerates in this entire kingdom, and every single one of them would sell me out for a fraction of that reward money without blinking."
"So we're not going in."
"We are absolutely not going in."
You went in.
In your defense, you hadn't fully decided to defy him so much as your feet had simply kept walking while your brain was still weighing the pros and cons, and by the time Martin caught up to grab your sleeve you were already three steps through the door. Into a low, smoke-hazed room packed with the strangest assembly of people you had ever seen in your entireβadmittedly very limitedβexperience of people.
There was a man built like a small mountain, missing most of his teeth, gently carving what appeared to be a delicate wooden hairpin. There was someone in the corner whose face you genuinely could not parse in the low lightβtoo many angles, somehow, like looking at a person through cracked glassβquietly mending a fan.
There were twin brothers arm-wrestling with murderous focus over what turned out, on closer inspection, to be a single dumpling. Someone had a pet weasel draped around their neck like a scarf. Someone else appeared to be knitting something with visibly too many needles. The whole room smelled like woodsmoke and old rice wine and something underneath that you couldn't place and didn't especially want to.
Every single head in the room turned when the door swung shut behind you.
"We're leaving," Martin said, very quietly, into your ear.
"Is that Martin Edwards?" said the mountain-sized man with the hairpin, in a voice that dropped the temperature of the room several degrees.
"No," Martin said.
"That's definitely him," said someone else.
"That is notβokay, fine, hi, yes, hello everyone, lovely establishment, we're just passing throughβ"
What followed was, by your private accounting, one of the strangest and best evenings of your entire life.
It started with the reward moneyβsomeone in the back producing a slightly more accurate wanted poster, teeth and all, and passing it around with escalating commentary, the twins, apparently named Seonghyeon and Juhoon, abandoning their dumpling war entirely to lean over and study Martin's face against the drawing with academic seriousnessβand slid, somehow, without your ever quite catching the exact moment it happened, into a full-throated, half-drunk, wildly enthusiastic taunting song, the whole room joining in verse by verse, about every humiliating thing anyone in the establishment had ever heard about Martin Edwards.
The man with the weasel started it, banging a wooden cup against the table for rhythm, and it snowballed from there the way these things always seemed to in a room full of people who'd clearly been waiting years for an excuse.
Oh, the boy who came from nowhere, with his smile and his fine clothesβthinks he's someone, thinks he's special, thinks the whole wide kingdom knows,
sang the man with the weasel, and the twins picked it up without missing a beat, still slightly out of breath from the dumpling war,
but we remember when he begged us for a bowl of rice, a place to sleepβnow he struts around in silk scraps calling himself something deep!
"That is one time," Martin said, to no one in particular, to the entire room, to the universe. "That was one specific winter,that is not a fair representative sample of myβ"
Nobody was listening. The person with too many needles had abandoned her knitting entirely to conduct the room like an orchestra, and Namjoon's booming baritone came in over the top of everyone else's,
Oh, his teeth are crooked as a fence line, oh, his hair's a rooster's crest, and the last time that he tried to smolder a fisherman's wife laughed so hard she fell in the river and had to be fished out herself β
which was, you gathered, not even remotely true and possibly the single funniest thing anyone had said all evening, judging by the way Martin's whole face went scarlet and the room dissolved into fresh, delighted chaos.
"That last one isn't even trueβ" Martin tried, over the singing, and got roundly ignored, and you watched, absolutely delighted, from your seat on an overturned barrel, as an entire room of strangers dismantled him verse by gleeful verse, and did not, notably, join inβnot because you weren't tempted, but because you found it far funnier to simply watch his face while it happened, the specific, put-upon suffering of a man who could not decide whether to laugh or storm out and kept landing, over and over, on some helpless combination of both.
There was something underneath the teasing, too, that you only half caughtβa warmth in it, the particular rough affection of people who'd known someone a long time and had earned the right to be cruel to him in a way that was really just another word for fond.
Namjoon clapped Martin on the shoulder hard enough to stagger him mid-verse and called him boy in a voice gone suddenly soft under all the noise.
You found yourself wondering, not for the first time that night, exactly how long ago it had been that a much younger Martin Edwards had first shown up in a place like this with nowhere else to go, and exactly what had happened to him before that, that a room full of thieves and degenerates had ended up feeling, to him, like the closest thing to family he had.
You filed the thought away to ask about later. You had a feeling it wasn't a question he'd answer easily, or sober, or with an audience.
"You're not even going to defend me," he said to you, mid-chorus, over the noise.
"I'm having a wonderful time."
"That is betrayal, that's what that isβ"
"They're not even wrong about the teeth thing."
"They are entirely wrong about the teeth thing, my teeth are fineβ"
Somewhere around the fourth verse, the man with the hairpinβwhose name, you'd gathered, was something like Namjoon, though it was hard to be sure over the singingβleaned across the table toward you with the particular intensity of someone who had decided you were the most interesting thing in the room.
"You," he pointed. "You have good energy. You've never danced on a table before, have you?"
"I've never been in a room before," you said, honestly, which seemed to delight him even further.
"Well," he said, standing, extending a huge, hairpin-carving hand toward you with genuine ceremony, "there's a first time."
You should have said no. You thought, distantly, of Mother's voice, of every warning about the danger and filth of the outside world, and then you thought about how good it had felt, hours ago, to have your bare feet in a river for the first time in your life, and you took the enormous man's hand and let him haul you, laughing, up onto the low wooden table.
It turned out you were, against every expectation, a genuinely excellent dancerβeighteen years of solitary practice in a round tower room had to be good for somethingβand the room roared its approval as you spun, skirts of your hanbok flaring out around your ankles, hair flowing, laughing so hard your ribs ached.
Martin stood below the table with an expression that had stopped being annoyed several minutes ago and had settled into something else entirely, something he was clearly trying very hard not to let show on his face and failing at almost completely.
The twins abandoned all pretense of arm-wrestling entirely to bang out a rhythm on the tabletop with the flats of their hands, and the man with the weasel produced, from some hidden pocket, a small reed flute he turned out to play with startling skill, weaving a quick, bright melody underneath the room's continued heckling of Martin, who had by now given up defending his teeth entirely and switched to a full, aggrieved commentary on the general injustice of his evening.
"This is not what I agreed to when I climbed through that window," he called up at you, though he was smiling despite himself, that same helpless, undone expression creeping further across his face with every spin you took. "I signed up for hiding. Quietly. In a tower. Notβthis. Not a full musical indictment of my character followed by you personally providing the evening's entertainment."
"You're welcome to join me," you called back, breathless, delighted, and watched with enormous satisfaction as his face went briefly, thoroughly panicked.
"Absolutely not."
"Coward."
"Strategist. There's a meaningful difference between the twoβ"
Namjoon, still clapping along from below, tipped his head back and roared with laughter loud enough to rattle the paper windows, and even Kono, perched safely on a high shelf out of the way of the chaos, seemed to have relaxed enough to bob his small head faintly along with the flute's rhythm, which you filed away as further evidence, alongside the nose-attack yet to come, that his feelings about Martin were considerably more complicated than his usual sniffing disdain let on.
It was, of course, at that exact momentβyou spinning, laughing, glowing in the lanternlight, framed perfectly in the hanok's single paper windowβthat the door burst open.
Mother stood in the frame, still dressed for travel, face utterly, terribly still, and every single sound in the room died at once.
You would replay the next thirty seconds for years afterward and never fully be able to piece together the order they happened in.
Mother's eyes found yours across the room and something in them cracked openβnot relief, you understood, even in the moment, even through the roaring in your ears. Not relief. Fury, dressed up as fear, the way it always was.
"You," Mother said, and her voice, even pitched low, even across a room gone suddenly silent, carried the way it always had, carved out of something colder than the room's actual temperature. She didn't shout. She never shouted; shouting would have meant losing something, and Mother did not lose things, she simply took them back. "Get down from there. Now."
You didn't move. You were aware, distantly, of how strange it wasβthat a woman who had raised you for eighteen years, whose voice had shaped nearly every rule you'd ever lived by, could stand in a doorway and still make your whole body want to obey before your mind had caught up to deciding whether it should.
"I was justβ"
"I don't care what you were just. Look at you. Look at what he's done to you already." Mother's eyes flicked, briefly, murderously, to Martin, standing frozen below the table. "This is exactly what I warned you about. Exactly. One night outside that tower and already you'reβ" she gestured, sharp and contemptuous, at the whole scene, the hanok, the strangers, your loosened hair, "β this."
"This is the most fun I've had in my entire life," you said, and heard your own voice shake only slightly.
Something in Mother's face did something complicatedβnot softened, not exactly, but shifted, the fury underneath it briefly, dangerously exposed. "That tower kept you safe."
"That tower kept me contained."
"There she is," said someoneβone of the guards behind Mother, you realized, a whole detail of them, come looking for the man on the wanted poster and finding, instead, considerably more than they'd bargained for.
The room dissolved into chaos.
Later, you would understand that half the hanok's patrons had their own reasons to want no part of a run-in with royal guards, and so what happened next was less an act of loyalty to you or Martin specifically and more a matter of shared, practical self-interestβbut in the moment it felt like nothing short of a miracle.
The mountain of a man with the hairpin suddenly hauling a table sideways to block the door, the twins scattering rice wine across the floor to send the first guard through it skidding, the person with too many needles somehow managing to tangle an entire coil of yarn around someone's ankles.
"Move, moveβ" Martin had you by the wrist, hauling you off the table and through a low doorway at the back of the hanok you hadn't even noticed, past a stack of firewood that Namjoon shoved aside with one huge hand to reveal a narrow black gap in the wall, barely wide enough for the two of you, sloping down into the dark.
"In, go, goβ" and then you were falling, more than climbing, into a tunnel that smelled of packed earth and old stone, Martin's hand fused to your wrist. Kono was a frantic weight against your collarbone, the sound of shouting and splintering wood fading fast above you as the two of you half-ran, half-stumbled through absolute blackness.
The tunnel was narrower than it had looked from the mouth of itβlow enough in places that Martin had to duck, cursing under his breath every time his shoulder caught stone, and twice the passage forked without warning, no light to guide the choice, nothing but Martin's hand tightening around yours and a muttered "left, I think, leftβ" that you had no way of verifying and every reason to simply trust.
Somewhere behind you, muffled through packed earth, you heard the unmistakable scrape of the firewood being shoved aside a second time, and a voiceβnot Mother's, one of the guards, sharp and close in a way that made your stomach dropβcalling that they'd found the passage.
"Faster," Martin breathed, and you didn't need telling twice, your bare palm scraping stone as you half-felt your way forward, heart slamming so hard you could feel it in your throat. The darkness pressed close enough on every side that for one disorienting stretch you lost all sense of which way was even forward anymore, trusting nothing but the grip of his hand and the sound of his breathing just ahead of you.
A light bobbed somewhere behindβtorchlight, catching the tunnel wall in a brief orange smear before you rounded another bend and lost it againβand you thought, with a clarity that cut cleanly through the panic, they're going to catch us, and then, right on its heels, absurdly, I don't even care, this is the most alive I have ever felt in my entire life.
You should have been terrified.
Some distant, sensible part of you understood that you were, technically, terrifiedβMother's face, the guards, the very real danger of the last thirty secondsβand yet underneath the fear was something so bright and enormous it eclipsed nearly everything else, something that had been building all day, all evening, every single moment since your feet first touched river water, and it broke open now in the pitch dark of that tunnel as something you could only describe as pure, uncut joy.
You were laughing. You realized it somewhere in the second minute of running, blind, hand in hand with a wanted thief, chased by your own mother's guards, and you were laughing so hard you could barely breathe, and Martinβsomewhere ahead of you in the dark, breathless himselfβstarted laughing too, and the two of you burst out of the far end of the tunnel into open moonlit air still half-doubled over, gasping, giddy, alive in a way you didn't have words for yet.
You collapsed against a fallen log at the tunnel's mouth, chest heaving, hair a wild mess around your shoulders, and looked up at the starsβmore of them than you'd ever seen from your tower window, spilled out edge to edge across the whole enormous skyβand thought, with a clarity that startled you: this. This is what I wanted.
"You," Martin said, still catching his breath beside you, staring at you like he was seeing something for the first time, "are a genuinely terrifying person."
"I danced on a table."
"You incited a riot."
"I think that was mostly you."
"No, that wasβokay, that was a little me, but youβ" he gestured at you, helplessly, at your wrecked hair and your flushed face and the grin you couldn't have wiped off if you tried, "βyou're supposed to be the sheltered one. The tower girl. And instead you're out here dancing on tables and outrunning royal guards on your first day of freedom like you were made for it."
"Maybe I was."
Something shifted in his face when you said thatβquick, unguarded, gone almost before you could catch itβand for a second neither of you said anything at all, just sat there in the moonlight with your shoulders nearly touching, breathing hard, the tunnel's dark mouth still gaping open behind you.
"Princess," he said, quieter now, no teasing in it at all.
"That's not my name."
"I know." He was still looking at you. "Doesn't mean it's not true."
You let the silence sit for a moment, the two of you still catching your breath, the tunnel's dark mouth gaping open behind you like something that had swallowed the version of yourself who'd walked into that hanok an hour ago and spat out someone slightly different.
"Can I ask you something," you said, eventually.
"You're going to anyway."
"That man. Namjoon. He called you boy like he'd known you a long time."
Something in Martin's face shuttered, just slightly, the easy grin dimming a few degrees without fully disappearing. "Long time's a strong way to put it."
"How long?"
He was quiet long enough that you thought he wasn't going to answer at all, picking at a loose thread on his sleeve with more focus than the thread deserved.
"I grew up in an orphanage," he said finally, not looking at you. "Not a nice one. The kind that stops feeding you the second you're old enough to feed yourself, more or less. I left when I was about twelve, lived rough for a while, and that placeβthat hanok, all those people you just watched sing an entire ballad about my teethβthat was the first place that ever fed me without asking anything back the first time I walked in half-starved and half my current size. So. Long time. Longer than I usually admit to strangers who hit me with singing bowls."
"I'm not a stranger anymore."
"No," he agreed, glancing at you sideways, something almost surprised in it, like he was only just now noticing that fact himself. "I suppose you're not."
"Is that why you steal things? Because nobody ever gave you anything, so you decided to just take it instead?"
"That's very poetic. Did you rehearse that."
"I'm asking a real question."
He exhaled, long, and looked back up at the stars instead of at you. "Something like that, probably. I used to tell myself it was about the money. One good score, enough to disappear somewhere nobody's ever heard the name Martin Edwards, buy myself an island, live like a king who answers to nobody."
He shrugged, and the shrug didn't quite land the way he probably wanted it to. "Lately I've started to suspect it was never really about the money at all. Might've just been about proving I could have something. Anything. That nobody could take away from me the way everything got taken when I was a kid."
You didn't say anything right away. You thought about eighteen years in a round tower, about a woman who called your safety love and meant, underneath it, control, about how you'd never once had anything that was fully, unquestionably yours eitherβnot your name, not your time, not even, until tonight, your own two feet standing wherever they wanted to stand.
"I think," you said slowly, "we might have more in common than you'd expect from a lost girl and a thief."
"You admit it, then. Princess."
"I admit nothing. I'm making an observation about orphaned longing, don't twist it into something else."
He laughed at thatβa real laugh, surprised out of himβand some of the tightness went out of his shoulders. "Orphaned longing. You really did rehearse that."
"I did not."
"You absolutely did, you've been sitting on that phrase since the tunnel."
"I have never sat on a phrase in my life," you said, with as much dignity as you could manage, and he laughed again, and the two of you sat there a while longer in the moonlight, not saying much else, letting the quiet settle into something that felt less like the awkward silence of strangers and more like the comfortable kind that came, usually, from people who'd known each other a great deal longer than one very strange day.
The next two days passed the way you imagined a fever mightβbright and disorienting and slightly unreal, every hour crowded with more new things than you'd experienced in the previous eighteen years combined.
You learned that Martin snored, faintly, when he slept sitting up against a tree, and that Woojoo had apparently made it his personal mission to step on his boots at every possible opportunity for the rest of what you assumed would be their entire acquaintance.
You learned that Kono had strong opinions about which berries were safe to eat and communicated them via a truly impressive range of disapproving noises. You learned the names of three separate mountain ranges, none of which matched the ones you'd painted from imagination, and foundβto your surpriseβthat you liked the real ones better.
You found a stream on the first afternoon, cold and clear and shallow enough to wade into without fear, and spent nearly an hour there simply standing in it, letting the current pull at the hem of your hanbok, while Martin sat on the bank pretending not to watch you and failing at it almost entirely.
When you splashed himβdeliberately, gleefully, without an ounce of remorseβhe retaliated with such wounded overcommitment that the two of you ended up soaked through within minutes, both of you laughing too hard to properly aim, Kono shrieking indignantly from a dry rock where he'd wisely relocated at the first sign of hostilities, and Woojoo watching the entire spectacle from the treeline with what you could only describe as profound equine disappointment in both of you.
You learned, too, in quieter moments, the shape of things Martin didn't say out loud.
The way he went very still and unusually gentle whenever you flinched at a loud noise, some old tower-bred instinct you hadn't fully shaken; the way he always, without seeming to think about it, put himself slightly between you and the road whenever another traveler passed.
The way he never once, not even once, asked why a girl who'd apparently never left a tower before knew so much about anatomy or herbs or the exact temperature at which honey turned to poison in the wrong hands, information you'd absorbed purely from Mother's paranoid insistence on preparing you for dangers that had never once, until this week, actually arrived.
You also learned, gradually, and against your own better judgment, that you liked Martin Edwards considerably more than you'd planned to.
He tried the smolder on the second evening, apropos of nothing, while you were both crouched by a small campfire waiting for a rabbit he'd insisted, with wild overconfidence, that he knew how to properly cook.
You caught him doing it out of the corner of your eye firstβa slow, deliberate turn of his head toward you, chin dropping slightly, eyes going half-lidded and soft in a way that was clearly meant to be devastating, one eyebrow lifting with the practiced precision of a man who had, you suspected, spent real time perfecting this exact expression in the reflection of still water.
You stared at him.
He held the look.
You kept staring.
He held it a little longer, jaw set, the corner of his mouth doing something you assumed was supposed to read as rakish,and you watched, fascinated, as the muscles around his eye began, very slightly, to twitch with the effort of maintaining it.
"What are you doing," you said finally.
The smolder collapsed instantly, entirely, like a tent losing its center pole. "Nothing."
"You were doing something with your face."
"I was not doing anything with my face, that's just my face, that's how my face looksβ"
"Your face looked like you were having some kind of episode."
"That," Martin said, with wounded dignity, turning very deliberately back to the fire, "is called charisma, and it has worked on every singleβyou know what, never mind. Forget it. Rabbit's probably done."
"Try it again."
He looked at you, suspicious. "Why."
"I want to see if it's worse the second time or if that was just a fluke."
"It is not going to be worse, it is going to be exactly as devastating as the first time, I simply chose not to fully commit to it because I was distracted by the rabbitβ"
"Prove it."
He set his jaw, visibly gathering himself, and tried againβchin dropping, eyes half-lidding, that same eyebrow rising with what was clearly meant to be effortless, smoldering confidenceβand made it a full three seconds before a piece of ash popped from the fire close enough to his knee that he flinched, hard, breaking the whole expression apart into a startled yelp that had absolutely nothing rakish about it whatsoever.
You laughed so hard you had to set down the stick you'd been roasting your portion of rabbit on, doubling over, and Martin sat there looking deeply, personally betrayed by an ember.
"That doesn't count," he said, with the flat, aggrieved certainty of a man who knew perfectly well that it counted completely. "That was an unrelated incident. The face itself was flawless right up until the interruption."
"I've genuinely never seen anything less flawless in my life."
"You've been alive for four days outside a tower, your knowledge is extremely limitedβ"
"I've seen Woojoo make a more convincing case for himself."
"Now you're just being cruel."
"I'm being honest," you said, wiping at your eyes, and he huffed, and threw a small twig at you that you batted easily out of the air, and the two of you settled back into an easy quiet, the fire popping softly between you, Woojoo a dark, watchful shape at the edge of the clearing, apparently satisfied enough with the evening's proceedings to have stopped glaring, for once.
The rabbit was not, in fact, done, nor would it ever really achieve a state you could confidently call cooked, and you ate it anyway, sitting close enough to the fire that your shoulders kept brushing, and somewhere in the space of that mealβburnt, underdone, genuinely one of the worst things you'd ever eaten and yet somehow, impossibly, one of your favorite meals of your entire lifeβyou caught yourself watching the firelight move across his face and thinking, with a lurch you weren't at all prepared for, oh. Oh, no.
Kono, curled in your lap, looked up at you with an expression you were beginning to read with alarming fluency, and it said, quite clearly: I saw that. We are going to discuss this later.
"Shut up," you told him, out loud, and Martin glanced over.
"I didn't say anything."
"Not you." You nodded down at Kono, who flicked his tail smugly. "Him."
"That thing has never liked me."
"He doesn't like anyone."
"He likes you."
"I raised him from an egg, that's different."
"Sure." Martin was smiling now, small and real, none of the practiced charm from earlier, just something quieter underneath it. "He's very protective. It's actually a little sweet. In aβweirdly feral, judgmental sort of way."
"Don't call my dragon feral."
"I would never," he said, entirely unconvincingly, and you laughed, and Kono made a noise of deep personal offense, and somewhere above you the first stars were coming out over a sky that would, tomorrow night, on the night of your birthday, fill entirely with gold.
The village you passed through the next morning was small and half-asleep, a scatter of tile-roofed houses along a single dusty road, a well at the center where two old women stood gossiping over their buckets, a market just beginning to set up its stalls in the cool early lightβand you stood at the edge of it for a long moment, just looking, before Martin had to physically steer you forward by the shoulder.
"You're doing the thing again."
"I've never seen a market before."
"You've never seen anything before, that's becoming a running theme of this trip." But he said it gently, none of his usual bite in it, and let you drift from stall to stall at your own paceβa woman selling dried persimmons strung on twine, a man with a cart of polished wooden combs, a girl not much younger than you hawking little clay bells that chimed high and sweet when you touched them.
You bought nothing, because you had no money, a fact that seemed to strike Martin as personally intolerable the moment he noticed you eyeing a small painted fan for the third time.
"Here," he said, and before you could stop him he'd produced a string of coins from somewhere inside his jacketβyou didn't ask where, and strongly suspected you didn't want to knowβand pressed them into the fan-seller's hand with the easy, practiced charm of a man who did this sort of thing often, emerging a moment later to hand you the fan with a small, exaggerated bow. "For the gongju."
"You don't have to do that."
"I know I don't have to. I'm choosing to. There's a difference, I keep telling you this."
You turned the fan over in your handsβpainted with a scene of cranes over a lake, delicate, nothing like the practical, sturdy things Mother had ever allowed youβand felt something in your chest go warm and a little overwhelmed, the specific ache of being given something small and unnecessary and entirely, purely kind.
"Thank you," you said, and meant it more than the words could really carry.
"Don't get used to it," Martin said, though his ears had gone faintly pink again, the way they did whenever you caught him being sincere. "I have a reputation to maintain. Ruthless. Self-interested. Very hard to impress."
"You just bought a stranger a fan."
"I bought you a fan, that's different, you're notβ" he seemed to catch himself, some thought crossing his face he clearly hadn't meant to say out loud, and cleared his throat instead. "Anyway. We should keep moving. Overlook's still a few hours off, and I'd like to actually get you there with enough daylight to see the view properly."
You let him change the subject, mostly because you weren't sure you were ready either to examine what he'd almost said, but you tucked the fan carefully into your sleeve, next to Kono, who eyed it with mild suspicion before apparently deciding it posed no threat to his position and settling back down.
The two of you left the village with Woojoo laden down, somewhat improbably, with a small sack of persimmons Martin had also boughtβ"for the horse," he'd said, unconvincingly, though you both knew perfectly well who was going to end up eating most of themβand walked the rest of the morning in an easy, comfortable quiet, broken only occasionally by Martin pointing out landmarks, or you asking questions about the world that he answered, more and more, without any of the teasing he'd led with the day before.
"Can I ask you something," you said, somewhere around midday, watching the road unspool ahead of you toward hills that were, slowly, beginning to look less like mountains and more like the gentler rise of land near a coast.
"You keep asking me that like I have a choice."
"Why haven't you left? You could've, a dozen times by now. You've got your satchel, you've got a truce with Woojoo, you could've slipped off in the night and I'd never have caught you."
He was quiet for a moment, watching the road rather than you. "I've thought about it."
"And?"
"And I keep not doing it," he said, simply, like the answer surprised him as much as it seemed to surprise you. "Which is new. Historically I'm very good at leaving. It's sort of my whole thing. Get in, get what I need, get out before anyone gets attached, especially me." He glanced sideways at you, something wry and a little helpless in it. "You're making that considerably more difficult than usual, gongju."
You didn't have a response for thatβnot one you trusted yourself to say out loud, anywayβso you reached over instead and took his hand, the way you had at the tunnel's mouth, easy and instinctive, and he let you, lacing his fingers through yours without missing a step, and the two of you walked the rest of the afternoon that way, hands linked, saying nothing else about it at all.
You reached the overlook above the harbor just as the sun was beginning its long slide toward the water, the whole kingdom spread out below you in a way you'd only ever seen painted, and painted badly, from your own imaginationβthe palace roofs catching the last light, the sea beyond the harbor gone molten copper, boats coming in for evening with their sails full and orange.
"There it is," Martin said, quieter than you'd heard him yet, standing close beside you at the edge of the outlook. "Home of your mysterious lantern people."
You didn't answer right away. You were looking at the palaceβthe actual palace, not the vague shape you'd always imagined from your tower window, but real, close enough now to make out individual roof tiles, individual windows catching fire in the sunsetβand something in your chest was doing something you didn't entirely have language for. A pull. An ache, low and old, like a bruise you hadn't known was there until someone pressed it.
"You okay?" Martin asked.
"I don't know," you said, honestly. "It feels likeβ" you struggled for it, and gave up trying to find the exact shape of the feeling, settling instead for the closest true thing you had. "It feels like coming home to a place I've never been."
He was quiet for a moment, watching you rather than the view.
"In all honesty," he said, "I think you're going to like it there. Whatever it turns out to be, wherever it turns out you're from. I think the whole world's better with you loose in it, gongju. Bowl and all."
You looked at him with the last of the sunset gold across his face, that ridiculous, sincere, unguarded expression he clearly hadn't meant to let you seeβand you thought about tunnels and rivers and burnt rabbit and a hanok full of strangers singing about his teeth, and you thought, with the same clarity you'd had at the mouth of that tunnel two nights ago: this. I want this. Whatever this is turning into, I want it.
"Come on," you said instead, because you weren't brave enough yet to say the other thing, and reached for his hand, lacing your fingers through his like it was the easiest, most obvious motion in the world. "There's a boat down there with our name on it. I have a light show to see."
Below you, the first lanterns of the evening were already beginning to lift off the water, small and gold and multiplying, rising slow and steady into a sky gone the deep, glowing blue of early darkβand somewhere out past the harbor, thousands more were waiting to join them, waiting, though you didn't know it yet, for you.
Martin's hand tightened around yours.
"After you, princess," he said, and the two of you started down the hill together, toward the water, toward the light.
The boat Martin foundβborrowed, he insisted, with a straight face that fooled absolutely no one, from a dock crowded with a dozen identical little wooden craft, all of them clearly rented out for exactly this evening, exactly this purposeβwas small and low and smelled faintly of fish, and rocked alarmingly when you first climbed in, enough that you grabbed for his arm and he grabbed for the side of the boat and Kono, riding in your collar, made a noise of profound and specific betrayal at being jostled.
"Careful," Martin said, steadying you with a hand at your waist that lingered maybe half a second longer than strictly necessary, and you were fairly sure, from the way his ears had gone slightly pink, that he'd noticed it too.
Woojoo, denied entry to the boat on account of being an entire horse, watched the proceedings from the dock with an expression of deep personal injury, and had to be bribed with the promise of an extra ration of feed before he'd agree to wait, tail swishing, ears pinned, radiating the specific fury of a creature left behind on the one night that mattered.
"He'll forgive you eventually," you said, as Martin pushed off from the dock with a long oar, the little boat gliding out onto water gone glassy and still with the coming dark.
"He has never forgiven me for anything in his entire life. I stole an apple from his feed bag once, two years ago, and I am fairly sure he still brings it up in whatever passes for a horse's internal monologue."
"Poetic justice."
"You're supposed to be on my side."
"I'm on Kono's side. And apparently Woojoo's. You seem to have accumulated a great many enemies for one man."
"They're not enemies," Martin said, settling the oar and letting the boat drift, "they'reβcreatures with very high standards who happen to have chosen me as their personal project. It's a compliment, really, if you think about it correctly."
"I don't think that's what a compliment is."
"You'll come around."
The kingdom had gone properly dark behind you now, the palace a black shape against a sky just beginning to prickle with stars, and the harbor water held every scattered lantern-light in perfect, trembling reflection, so that it felt, floating there, like you were suspended between two skiesβone above, one below, and you in the exact still center of both.
"It's almost time," you said, quiet, watching the palace. Something in your chest had gone tight and expectant, the same old ache from the overlook, except closer now, close enough that you thought you might be able to name it if you sat with it a little longer.
Martin didn't say anything. He'd gone still too, watching you rather than the palace, in a way you were becoming increasingly, helplessly aware of.
And then the first note soundedβa low horn, from somewhere within the palace walls, carrying clean and mournful across the waterβand the sky above the towers began, all at once, to fill with gold.
all those days, watching from the windows
You had watched this exact sight, every year of your life, from a single round window a mile up a mountainside, small and distant and never once close enough to feel the heat of the paper or hear the soft rush of a thousand wicks catching flame at once. You had painted it, badly, from memory, over and over, never quite able to get the specific quality of the light right, the way it wasn't quite gold and wasn't quite orange but some living color in between, restless, warm, endlessly multiplying.
Nothing you had ever painted came close.
now i'm here, blinking in the starlight
now i'm here, suddenly i see
standing here
The lanterns rose in waves, not all at once but in long, cascading pulsesβa hundred, then another hundred, then more than you could count, drifting up from courtyards and rooftops and the decks of boats all across the harbor, joining together into a slow, vast river of light climbing the dark sky. The water around your little boat filled with their reflections until it was impossible to say, looking down, where the true lanterns ended and the false ones beganβgold above you, gold below you, and you sitting in the very middle of it with your breath caught somewhere behind your ribs.
"Oh," you said, which was not remotely adequate to the size of what you were feeling, but was all you had.
"Yeah," Martin said, softly, and when you looked over at him he wasn't watching the lanterns at all. He was watching you, your face lit gold and trembling with reflected light, your eyes wide and wet in a way you hadn't quite noticed until you felt the first tear slip free and had to laugh, embarrassed, wiping at it with the back of your wrist.
"I've waited my whole life for this."
"I know."
"I didn't even know what I was waiting for. I just knew that every year, this light showed up in the sky, and something in me hurt, every time, and I never understood why, and now I'm sitting here and I still don't fully understand why except that it feels likeβ" you struggled for it again, the same struggle as the overlook, except this time you didn't let yourself give up on finding the words.
and the world has somehow shifted.
"It feels like they were waiting for someone. And some enormous, stupid, hopeful part of me has always believed, without any evidence at all, that the someone was me."
Martin was quiet for a long moment, and when you glanced at him his expression had gone soft and unguarded in a way you'd only caught glimpses of beforeβat the campfire, at the mouth of the tunnel, never allowed to sit still on his face long enough for you to really look at it.
"For what it's worth," he said, "I think it probably was."
all at once, everything looks different... now that i see you.
Reaching into his satchel, he drew out two lanternsβsmall, folded flat, clearly purchased at some point during the walk down from the overlook, though you hadn't noticed him buying them, too absorbed in the viewβand passed one across to you, along with a little punk of glowing incense to light the wick.
"I got us our own," he said, almost shy about it, which did not suit him at all and which you found, helplessly, endearing anyway. "Figured you shouldn't have to just watch other people's."
Your hands weren't quite steady as you unfolded the paper frame and touched the flame to the wick, the lantern blooming gold between your palms, warm and alive, straining gently upward the way they all did, wanting badly to join the great river of light rising above you.
"Make a wish," Martin said. "Isn't that the tradition? Birthday girl gets a wish."
You looked at him, sharp. "I never told you it was my birthday."
He had the grace, at least, to look faintly caught out. "You didn't have to. Lost princess, mysterious lantern obsession, refuses to give her real name, gets misty over a light show that happens on one specific night of the yearβI put it together somewhere around the singing-bowl incident, honestly."
"You've known this whole time."
"I've suspected this whole time. There's a difference. I was being polite about it."
"You've been calling me gongju for two days as a joke."
"I've been calling you gongju for two days because I was fairly confident, and also because it made you make that specific face you're making right now, which I happen to enjoy a great deal." He nodded down at the lantern cupped in your hands, steering neatly away from the moment before you could examine it too closely. "Make your wish, princess. Before it burns your fingers."
You held the lantern a moment longer, warm light spilling up between your hands onto your face, and thoughtβnot about the kingdom below, not even about the parents you didn't yet know you had, waiting somewhere in that dark palace with a hope they'd never once let themselves fully abandon. But about the man sitting across from you in a stolen boat, teeth genuinely, infuriatingly perfect, watching you like you were the only light on the entire water worth looking at.
You didn't say the wish out loud. But you let it go anyway, watched it rise and catch the current of wind that carried it up to join the thousands of others, and when you looked back down, Martin was still watching you, close enough now that you could count, if you'd wanted to, every one of his eyelashes.
"Your turn," you said, a little breathless.
He lit his own lantern, let it rise, and didn't look away from you while he did itβno smolder this time, none of the careful, practiced charm from the campfire that had made you laugh at him. Just him, looking at you, plain and raw and slightly disbelieving of his own luck Like a man who'd broken into a random tower to hide from two very angry brothers and found, instead of an empty room, the entire rest of his life.
"I'm not going to tell you what I wished for," he said, "but I will say it involves considerably less running from armed men than my last several wishes."
"That's a low bar."
"I'm a man of variety."
You laughedβyou couldn't help it, the sound coming out watery and warmβand somewhere in the laugh, without either of you quite deciding to, the space between you closed, his hand finding yours again in the bottom of the boat, and you found yourself leaning in, slow, the way the whole evening had been slow and inevitable since the moment he tumbled through your window, and he leaned in too, and for one full suspended second, gold light drifting down all around you like something out of a legend, you thoughtβthis. This is the thing I've been aching for every single year I watched it from too far away.
Kono chose that exact moment to launch himself, with great personal indignation, off your shoulder and directly onto the bridge of Martin's nose.
"Owβ" Martin reeled back, more startled than hurt, batting uselessly at the small dragon now clinging to his face with all four clawed feet and radiating profound betrayal. "Your dragon justβhe attacked me, did you see that, he full-onβ"
"He's protective," you said, laughing so hard you had to hold the sides of the boat to keep from tipping, tears mixing with the ones already on your face, watching Kono glare down at Martin from the very tip of his nose like a small, furious guardian spirit who had absolutely no intention of allowing anything interesting to happen without express supervision.
"He is feral, is what he isβ"
"He likes you," you said, wiping your eyes, still laughing. "This is how he shows it. Trust me. If he actually hated you, you'd know."
"This does not feel like liking, this feels like an assassination attemptβ"
Kono flicked his tail, unbothered, and settled himself with great satisfaction directly between the two of you on the boat's narrow bench, clearly intending to remain there for the foreseeable future, a small, smug, iridescent chaperone against a sky still falling gold, lantern light rippling gently across the water in every direction, thousands of tiny floating wishes drifting home at last to a girl who'd spent eighteen years wondering, in the quiet dark of a tower window, whether anyone out there was waiting for her.
They had been. All along. And now, impossibly, so was he.
You looked at Martin over the top of Kono's indignant, iridescent head, both of you still laughing, both of you still close enough to feel the warmth radiating off each other in the cooling night air, and you thought that whatever happened next. Whatever the palace held, whatever answers waited for you at the bottom of that harbor, whatever Mother would do when she finally caught up to you, because you had no illusions that she wouldn'tβthis part, right here, the boat and the gold light and the ridiculous, wounded dragon and the ridiculous, wonderful man across from you, was a part you were never, ever going to forget.
"Happy birthday, gongju," Martin said, quiet, over the top of a still-hissing Kono, and you thought, looking at him, that for the first time in your entire life, you actually believed it.
Laterβmuch later, after the last of the lanterns had burned low and drifted, spent, back down toward the water, after Woojoo had forgiven you both just enough to let Martin scratch behind his ears without incident, after Kono had finally abandoned his post between you to curl up, smug and victorious, in the fold of your sleeveβyou rowed the little boat back toward shore in a silence that wasn't empty at all. It was full instead of everything neither of you had quite said yet, the two of you sitting close enough that your knees kept knocking together with every small motion of the water.
You didn't know yet what waited for you at the top of that hillβwhat the palace would say when a girl with hair like sunlight walked through its gates for the first time in eighteen years, what Mother would do when she finally caught up to the two of you, what it would cost, in the end, to keep any of this. You only knew that you didn't want the night to be over, that some small, stubborn, hopeful part of you had already decided, somewhere between the singing bowl and the lantern light, that whatever came next, you wanted to face it with your hand in his.
"What happens now?" you asked, quiet, as the shore came slowly closer, torchlight from the docks beginning to flicker gold across the water to meet you.
Martin was quiet for a moment, considering the question with more weight than his usual answers ever carried.
"I don't know," he admitted, finally. "I've never actually planned past the running-away part before. Usually there isn't a now. There's just the next place to be, and the next, and I never stick around long enough to find out what comes after."
"And this time?"
He looked at you, truly and deeply gazed. It was the way he had at the overlook, at the tunnel's mouth, at every unguarded moment he'd let slip through the cracks of his own careful charm over the past four daysβand something in his face settled, like a decision he'd already made without quite admitting it to himself.
"This time," he hummed, "I think I'd like to find out."
The boat bumped gently against the dock, and somewhere above you, one last, late lantern rose alone into the dark, gold and small and stubborn, chasing after all the others that had gone before itβand you thought, watching it go, that it looked exactly like hope.
Morning came in gray and soft, mist lying low over the harbor the way it did most mornings this close to the water, and you woke tucked against the base of a fishing boat with Kono curled warm against your throat and Martin already awake beside you, satchel across his shoulder, watching the fog with an expression you didn't much care for.
"You're making a weird face," you said, sitting up, voice still thick with sleep. "This like... stiff, deciding-something face."
"I don't have a stiff, deciding-something face."
"You absolutely do. You had it right before you climbed through my window and you have it right now."
He exhaled, and some of the careful blankness dropped away, replaced by something more honestβnervous, almost, in a way that didn't suit him nearly as well as the sarcasm usually did. "I want to do this properly. Whatever this is turning into." He nodded down at the satchel, at the unmistakable shape of the crown inside it. "I know people who'll take this off my hands for real money, enough that neither of us has to run from anything ever again. I want to trade it, clean, and come back for you, and thenβI don't know. Figure out the rest. Together, if you'll have me."
"You could just give it back."
"I could," he agreed, "and normally I'd have laughed you out of the harbor for suggesting it. But I'm finding, lately, that a lot of things that used to make sense don't anymore, and a lot of things I never used to consider are starting to sound like exactly what I want." He reached out, tucked a loose strand of hair back from your face, unbearably gentle about it. "Wait for me here. I won't be long."
"You'd better not be."
"Princess." He said it soft, like a promise rather than a joke, and pressed one quick, warm kiss to your forehead before you could think of anything clever enough to say back. "I'll be back before the fog burns off. I swear it."
You watched him go, satchel bouncing against his hip, Woojoo trailing reluctantly after him with the particular resigned loyalty of a creature who'd decided, against every instinct, to trust his rider one more timeβand you sat there on the damp dock with Kono in your lap, watching the mist swallow him up, and told yourself, firmly, that the ache in your chest was nothing. Just morning cold. Just nerves. Nothing at all like fear.
The fog thickened instead of burning off, and the longer you waited the worse the ache in your chest got, until you couldn't sit still any longer and started pacing the dock's edge, Kono clinging tight to your shoulder, both of you straining to hear anything at all beyond the slow slap of water against the pilings.
You heard voices first. They were low and harsh, more than one man, coming from somewhere off along the tree line past the last of the boatsβand against every ounce of good sense you had left, you went toward them instead of away.
You found the clearing just past the fog's thickest bank, and what you found there stopped your heart cold: Martin on his knees in the mud, satchel gone, two enormous men standing over himβone you'd recognize instantly from the way Martin had gone rigid at the mere mention of them days ago, though you'd never learned their names until this moment.
Sunghoon. Jay. Buff, scarred, furious, and entirely unbothered by the fact that Martin was bleeding from a split lip and still trying, uselessly, to talk his way out.
"You cut us out," Sunghoon was saying, low and dangerous. "Two years of work, and you cut us out for a girl."
"It wasn't like thatβ"
"Save it." Jay's boot connected with Martin's ribs, and you had to bite down hard on your own hand to keep from crying out. "We'll take the crown. And we'll take the reward for you too. Two birds."
And then, from somewhere behind them, a voice you knew better than your own heartbeat, cool and pleasant and utterly without mercy.
"Gentlemen," Mother said, stepping out of the mist like she'd been waiting there all along, "I believe I can make this considerably more profitable for everyone involved."
You didn't understand, in the moment, what you were watchingβonly that Mother produced a small purse of coin, that Sunghoon and Jay's fury seemed to shift, calculating, weighing a better offer, that Martin's face went from pained to something close to horrified the second he understood what was happening.
"Don't," he said, to Mother, voice raw. "Whatever you're planningβleave her out of it. She doesn't have to be part of this."
"She has always been part of this," Mother said, almost gently, crouching down to his level with the particular tenderness she'd once reserved, you realized with a sick lurch, entirely for you. "You simply made the mistake of thinking you'd earned a say in it."
You didn't see exactly what happened nextβa scuffle, Martin shouting your name once, sharp and desperate, before something struck him and the sound cut offβbecause Mother had already turned, unerringly, toward the tree line where you stood frozen, and her eyes found yours through the fog with a precision that told you she'd known exactly where you were the entire time.
"There you are," she said, soft, and something about the softness was so much worse than the fury from the hanok. "Come along, darling. I think it's well past time we had a talk."
You ran. You didn't get far.
By the time the fog burned off, you were sitting in the belly of a small, windowless room that smelled of salt and old ropeβnot the tower, you understood dimly, some hidden place along the coast Mother had clearly kept in reserve for exactly this kind of contingencyβwrists bound loosely, more out of formality than real restraint, because Mother had never needed rope to keep you where she wanted you. She'd only ever needed your own heart, turned carefully against itself.
"He left, you know," she said, arranging herself on the room's single stool with the composure of a woman discussing the weather. "The moment those men offered him a way out, he took it. The crown. The reward money for turning you in besides, I'd imagineβa tidy sum for very little effort." She sighed, and it might almost have sounded sympathetic, if you hadn't spent eighteen years learning exactly how much genuine feeling lived underneath that particular sigh. "I saw the ship myself. Sailing out with the morning tide. I'm so sorry, darling. I did try to warn you what the world was like."
"You're lying."
"Am I?" She tilted her head, and something flickered behind her eyesβnot doubt, never doubt, but the faint, familiar satisfaction of a woman watching a plan click neatly into place. "You've known him four days. I've kept you safe for eighteen years. Which of us, do you truly think, has earned your trust?"
You wanted, badly, to believe it was a lieβevery instinct in your chest screamed that it wasβand yet some old, deep, tower-shaped part of you, the part that had spent a lifetime being told the world was cruel and that Mother alone could be counted on, curled up small and aching and terribly, terribly willing to believe her anyway. That was the cruelest part of it. Not the lie itself, but how easily, after everything, it still found purchase.
"I want to go home," Mother said, standing, brushing invisible dust from her skirts. "Not the towerβsomewhere new, somewhere he'll never think to look, somewhere I can keep you properly this time. You'll thank me for it, eventually. You always do."
You didn't answer. You sat very still in the dim, salt-smelling dark, and thought about a boat full of lantern light, and a man who'd bought you a fan for no reason at all, and a dragon who'd bitten his nose out of pure, ridiculous devotionβand something in you, quiet but absolutely unshakeable, refused, even now, even with the doubt gnawing at your ribs, to fully believe the story Mother was selling.
Martin woke in a cell.
His head throbbed, his ribs ached with every breath, and it took him several long, disoriented minutes to piece together that the last thing he rememberedβMother's voice, your name torn out of his throat, the world going darkβhad apparently ended with him here, iron bars, straw floor, and a guard outside who addressed him, with unmistakable relish, by the exact reward figure printed on his wanted poster.
"They're saying you kidnapped a girl," the guard said, almost cheerful about it. "Some noble's daughter. Word is the hanging's set for sundown. Shame about the teeth, by the wayβheard the sketch was more flattering than the real thing."
"I did not kidnap anyone," Martin gritted, with the flat, exhausted fury of a man repeating himself for the fifth time, "and my teeth are fineβ" and then stopped, because none of that mattered even slightly next to the one thought currently eclipsing everything else in his skull: she thinks I left her.
He didn't remember much of what happened after thatβonly that somewhere past midnight, a small, furious, iridescent shape came skittering through the cell's single high window, having tracked him across half the coastline on nothing but sheer stubborn will. Not long after, the cell door groaned open from the outside to reveal Namjoon's enormous, grinning face, flanked by the twins, the man with the weasel, and, filling the corridor behind them with visible, righteous indignation, one extremely large, extremely unimpressed horse.
"Heard you got yourself in trouble," Namjoon said. "Figured we'd come see if the rumors about your teeth were the only thing worth breaking you out for."
"I could kiss every single one of you," Martin said, already moving.
"Please don't," said one of the twins, Juhoon. "We heard about the fisherman's wife."
He found you by the coast road at dusk, Mother's carriage rattling ahead through the last of the fading light, and there was no time for a plan, no time for anything except Woojoo breaking into a dead run with Martin bent low over his neck and Kono clinging, white-knuckled, to his collar, the whole ragged, impossible rescue party thundering after a carriage carrying away the only thing that had ever made the running feel like it was going somewhere.
He caught them at the cliff road, where the trees gave way to open sky and the sea spread out gray and endless below, and Mother, seeing him, didn't so much as flinch.
"Persistent," she said, stepping down from the carriage alone, something cold and final settling into her face. "I did wonder if you'd manage it."
"Let her go."
"She's not yours to demand things about." Mother's eyes flicked past him, to where you'd appeared in the carriage doorway. His wrists finally free, staring at Martin like you couldn't quite trust the sight of himβbruised, breathless, undeniably, impossibly there. "Tell him, darling. Tell him what you told me. That you understand now. That the world outside only ever takes."
"I told you I didn't believe you," you said, voice shaking but clear, stepping down onto the road. "I still don't."
Something in Mother's composure cracked, just slightly, just enough. "You would choose him. After everything I've given you. Everything I've sacrificed."
"You didn't give me anything," you said, and the words came out steadier than you felt, eighteen years of swallowed truth finally finding air. "You took me. There's a difference. I've only just learned it, but I've learned it completely."
What happened next happened fast, and badly, the way real danger always doesβMother lunging, a blade you hadn't seen catching the last of the light, Martin throwing himself between the two of you with no more thought than he'd given anything else reckless and right over the past four days, and then the sharp, terrible sound of metal finding flesh, and Martin going down hard onto the cliff road with blood already spreading dark across his side.
"Martinβ"
"I'm fine," he said, which was so obviously, catastrophically untrue that you didn't even bother arguing, dropping to your knees beside him, hands already pressing hard against the wound, some old instinct screaming at you to sing, sing the old words, the ones Mother used every time she needed the magic, and you opened your mouth to do exactly thatβ
"Don't," Martin said, gripping your wrist with what strength he had left, eyes finding yours through the pain with a clarity that cut straight through everything else. "If you do thatβif you use it nowβshe'll never let either of us go. Not really. Not ever. She'll just keep finding a reason to need you broken enough to fix."
"I can't just let youβ"
"You can," he said, "trust me, princess, pleaseβ" and reached, with the last of his strength, for the small blade at his own belt, the one he'd used to fillet fish and cut rope and once, memorably, threaten a very rude tax collector, and before you fully understood what he meant to do, he'd taken hold of your long braid and cut, clean through, several feet of gold-shot hair falling away into the dirt at once, severed for good.
The change was immediate and terrible. The cut length dulled from gold to something ordinary and plain even as it fell, and Motherβmid-motion, reaching for you, for the hair, for the magic she'd spent a hundred years stealingβmade a sound you would never, for the rest of your life, be able to fully forget.
Her hands went first, skin creasing and thinning before your eyes, decades collapsing into her all at once, unstoppable now that the last thread keeping her young had been severed for good.
She staggered back toward the cliff's edge, aged a hundred years in the space of ten seconds, and the wind off the sea did the rest, catching what was left of her and scattering it, gray and weightless, out over the water until there was nothing left standing on the road at all.
You didn't watch it finish. You were already turned back to Martin, hands shaking, pressing uselessly against a wound that wasn't healing, that had no reason left to heal, because the magic that could have done it lay scattered in cut hair and ash somewhere behind you.
"Hey," Martin said, voice going thin, "heyβdon't do that face, the face you're doingβ"
"Don't you dare," you said, furious and breaking all at once. "Don't you dare talk to me about faces right nowβ"
"I'd do it again," he said, eyes already starting to lose their focus, "every time, exactly the same, I just want you to know that, in case I don't get toβ"
"You're not finishing that sentence."
He smiled anyway, small and lopsided, teeth perfectly, infuriatingly straight even now, and his eyes slid shut.
You didn't remember deciding to cry. You only remembered the tears coming, hot and helpless, one falling from your cheek straight onto the wound at his sideβand the low, golden hum that followed, faint but unmistakable, the last living echo of magic that had never fully left you even with the hair gone, because it had never really lived in the hair at all. It had always been in you.
The wound closed. Color came back into his face all at once, like a held breath finally released, and his eyes opened, blinking up at you in dazed, disbelieving confusion.
"You're supposed to be dead," you told him, half laughing, half sobbing, hands still shaking as you cradled his face.
"Rude," he said, voice cracked but unmistakably, wonderfully himself, "extremely rude, waking a man up just to insult himβ"
You didn't let him finish that sentence.
You kissed him before you'd fully decided to, both hands still fisted in the collar of his shirt where you'd been holding him together only seconds before, and it wasn't gentle β you didn't have gentle left in you, not after watching the color drain out of his face, not after the terrible, endless second where you'd genuinely believed you were about to lose him on a cliff road with the sea crashing below and no way left to fix it. It was too much all at once, everything you hadn't let yourself say out loud over four impossible days crashing out through your mouth against his instead β the fear, still shaking through your hands where they'd found his jaw; the relief, hot and overwhelming, closing your throat; the something else underneath both of those that you'd been carefully not naming since the moment he tumbled through your window and hadn't stopped, apparently, not even once, not even now.
Martin made a low, startled sound against your mouth β surprise, mostly, and then something that wasn't surprise at all β and his hand came up to cradle the back of your head, careful even now, even freshly healed and half out of his mind with everything that had just happened, fingers threading into what was left of your hair like he needed the proof of it, needed to know you were real and warm and still here under his hands. You felt him breathe out, shaky, against you, felt the last of the tension bleed out of his shoulders the way it never quite had, not fully, not once in the entire time you'd known him.
"You scared me," you said, when you finally, barely, pulled back far enough to speak, forehead pressed to his, both of you still breathing like you'd run the whole cliff road twice over. "YouΒ scaredΒ me, don't you dare ever do that againβ"
"No promises," he murmured, and you could feel him smiling against your mouth, that same infuriating, undimmed confidence creeping back in even now, even bloodied, even seconds from death and back again. "Apparently I throw myself in front of knives for you now. New personality trait. Very inconvenient."
"Martin."
"I mean it, though." His thumb traced along your jaw, slow, and when you met his eyes there was nothing left of the joke in them at all, just something steady and stripped bare, more honest than anything he'd let you see across four days of careful, practiced charm. "I'd do it again. Every single time, exactly the same, no hesitation, and I need you to actually hear that, not just β not just as something I say to be dramatic on a cliff. I mean it."
"I heard you the first time. Right before you nearly died proving it."
"Poor timing, historically my specialty," he agreed, and kissed you again before you could argue, slower this time, both of you steadier now, no longer shaking quite so hard, just close and warm and unwilling, for a long moment, to be anything but exactly where you wereβhis hand still tangled in your hair, yours still fisted in his ruined, blood-stained shirt, the whole world narrowed down to the small distance between your mouths and the specific, dizzying fact that he was alive to kiss you back.
Somewhere nearby, Kono shrieked with pure, unrestrained delight, launching himself in a small iridescent blur to land on Martin's shoulder and chirp something that sounded, for the first time in their entire acquaintance, like approval rather than threat.
Woojoo, standing a few respectful paces off, huffed out a long breath through his nose and, for once in his entire life, looked almost pleased about something Martin had doneβears forward, head tossed once as if in reluctant, grudging blessing, the closest thing to a truce he'd ever offered.
You laughed, breathless and wet-eyed, breaking the kiss just far enough to rest your forehead against his again. "Even Kono's happy. Do you understand how significant that is? He's never once been happy about you."
"I earned it," Martin said, hoarse, still smiling like he couldn't quite stop. "Nearly dying for you apparently buys a man some goodwill, even from a judgmental little dragon who's hated me since the moment I fell through a window."
"Don't get used to it."
"Too late," he said, and pulled you back in before you could answer, no urgency left in it now, just something slow and certain and entirely unhurried, the two of you kissing on a cliff road at dawn like you had all the time in the world left to spend exactly like this.
The palace gates opened at dawn to a girl with short, plain, ordinary hair and a face the king recognized, the moment he saw it. With a certainty that needed no proof at allβsome things a parent simply knows, in the body, before the mind has caught up to explaining why.
The queen reached you first, running down the palace steps in a way queens were certainly not supposed to run, and you didn't need eighteen years of stolen memory to understand, the instant her arms closed around you, exactly what you'd been missing every single night you'd watched those lanterns from too far away.
There was a great deal to explain, afterβa kingdom's worth of grief to untangle. A name to relearn that had been yours all along, a wanted man's record to quietly, thoroughly clear, which the king accomplished within the hour with the particular efficiency of a father who had just gotten his daughter back and had no patience left for bureaucratic nonsense.
Martin stood through most of it looking deeply, uncharacteristically nervous, hands shoved in his pockets, until the king finally turned to him and said, simply, "You brought her home," and something in Martin's whole posture eased for what looked like the first time in his entire life.
Kono took up permanent residence on the windowsill of your new rooms, deeply unimpressed by the palace's excessive number of servants and considerably more impressed by the quality of the kitchen scraps. Woojoo was given, over Martin's strenuous objections, an official post as a royal guard's mount, a position he apparently found so satisfying that his campaign of vengeful boot-stepping slowed, within a few months, to something almost like fondness.
Namjoon and the rest of the hanok's strange, loyal patrons were invited, formally, to the palace for the next year's lantern festival, and caused, by every account, an enormous and thoroughly enjoyable scandal.
And every year after that, on the anniversary of the night a stranger fell through a tower window and a girl hit him with a singing bowl, the two of you took a small boat out onto the harbor when the lanterns rose. They were gold and endless, filling the sky the way they always hadβexcept now, for the first time in either of your lives, you watched them from exactly where you were always meant to be.
"Happy anniversary, my gongju," Martin said, every single year, and every single year, you believed him a little more.
if she's here
it's crystal clear
i'm where i'm meant to go
pairing. flynn rider ! martin / f ! rapunzel reader
warnings + info. oneshot, fantasy au, tangled retelling, strangers to lovers, not exactly parallel to the movie so don't be confused if some things are different, kissing, violence, imagine messyhaired!tin ok?, features many people you know and love ;)
synopsis. a handsome thief hiding from his crimes picks the wrong tower to climb into, and the girl locked inside it has been waiting her whole life for an excuse to leave.
wc. 18.3k
maddy's note. i marinated on this idea for ages and finally it has come to fruition so i cannot wait for u guys to read it π! ik my martin girls are heavily deprived so this ones for u guys hehehe but especially for meri @griinspire and pearl @marsgirltyshi and lili @chocom0ka (and seulbi but she's Gone off blr) because no one does martins gf like they do ππ!!!
there is no playlist for this because, well, it has a soundtrack of its own and quite frankly i'm a little lazy to compile songs rn............. #iseethelighttruther
tagging 90% of Core15 bc they yell at me @kaikaikoi @hyuneskkami @hollyoongs @aerinettes
Once upon a time, in a kingdom nestled between green mountains and a sea the color of jade, there was born a princess.
Of course, like any other fairytale, she was not born ordinary. On the night before her birth, a single drop of moonlight was said to have fallen from the sky and rooted itself into the earth, blooming into a flower that glowed gold from root to petal. The palace healers, desperate to save the queen who lay dying in childbed, ground the flower into a tea and poured it past her lips, and by morning the queen lived, and by evening the princess was born with a single lock of hair that shone like sunlight caught in silk.
The kingdom rang bells for three days. The king wept. The people lit lanterns and floated them on the river in thanks to whatever gods had seen fit to spare their queen and gift them a princess who glowed.
But the flower's magic had not vanished when it was boiled into tea. It had simply movedβinto the girl. Into her hair, which did not merely shine but healed, which did not merely glow but sang low and golden when the right words were spoken over it, undoing wounds, softening age, drawing sickness out of the body like poison from a wound.
There was a woman in the kingdomβnever young, never quite old, a woman the years seemed to slide off of like water off stoneβwho had known about the flower long before the healers ever found it. She had kept it hidden for a hundred years, using its magic to keep herself exactly as she wished to remain. When it was taken from her and given to a queen and consumed by a birth she had no part of, something in her curdled.
She was called, by then, only Mother.
She came for the princess on a night when the moon was new and the palace slept heavy with relief. She did not take the flower. She took the girl instead, because the girl was the flower now, and she carried her from the palace in the dark and up into the mountains, to a tower with no door, only a single window round as an eye, hidden behind a curtain of waterfall and stone.
She raised the princess as her own. She told her that the world outside was full of people who would tear her apart for the power in her hair, that the tower was the only place she would ever be safe, that Mother's loveβsharp-edged and conditional and always, always followed by but you know I only want what's best for youβwas the only love the girl would ever need.
The king and queen sent lanterns into the sky every year on their daughter's birthday, thousands of them, gold as the flower that had saved the queen's life, in the small and stubborn hope that somewhere, somehow, their daughter would see them and know she was being waited for.
The girl in the tower saw them. Every year, from her window, she watched the far-off sky fill with floating light and never once knew they were for her.
She only knew that something in her chest ached every time the horizon lit up gold, and she never could explain why.
The king and queen never stopped hoping. Every year, when the lanterns had all burned low and drifted back down to the water, the queen would stand alone at the highest window of the palace a while longer than anyone else, watching the dark where the last of the light had gone, and the king would come find her there, and neither of them would say anything at all, because there was nothing left to say that eighteen years of the same silent vigil hadn't already said a hundred times over. They kept her room exactly as it had been. They never once let themselves call it a memorial, because a memorial was for something that was over, and they had never once let themselves believe it was over.
The kingdom, for its part, grew used to the grief the way kingdoms doβfolding it quietly into tradition, into the yearly ritual of light, into a story told to children at bedtime about a princess who might, one day, come home. Most had stopped truly expecting it. The lanterns kept rising anyway. Hope, it turned out, didn't require belief to keep going. It only required someone willing to light the wick one more time.
You had lived eighteen years in that tower, and in that time you had become, out of sheer boredom and stubbornness, extremely accomplished.
You could grind ink and paint mountains that looked like the ones you'd never climbed. You could play the gayageum until your fingers bled and then keep playing anyway. You'd taught yourself to read faster than Mother liked, to argue better than Mother liked, to want more than Mother liked, though you were careful never to let her see the wanting directly. You kept it folded small, tucked behind your ribs, brought out only at night with the shutters closed, when you traced the shapes of mountains you'd painted from imagination and wondered what they smelled like up close.
Kono did not approve of the wanting.
Kono was small, no longer than your forearm, built more like a lizard than the great serpentine dragons painted on temple ceilings, but for the two soft antler-like horns that curled back from his brow and the faint iridescent sheen to his scales that shifted blue to green to gold depending on how the light caught himβthe exact shifting, you'd always thought, of oil on water, or of a fish turning in a stream. He had a long tail he liked to wrap possessively around your wrist, small clawed feet that could grip silk without snagging it, and an expression, for a creature with no eyebrows, of near-constant and deeply personal disappointment in you.Β
He had been left on your windowsill as a hatchling the summer you turned nine, small and starving and furious about it, and had simply never left, and you had never really asked why a mountain temple's guardian creature had abandoned his post to live with a girl in a tower, and he had never told you.
He was, as far as you'd ever heard, meant to bring luck. You mostly found this funny.
"I'm just saying," you told him, that particular evening, standing at the window with your chin in your hands, watching the light change over the tree line, "that if I have to hear one more story about how the outside world is full of ruffians and cutthroats waiting specifically for me, I might actually go looking for the ruffians and cutthroats just to see if they're more interesting than staying here."
Kono made a small, unimpressed noise and flicked his tail against your neck.
"You're right, you're right. Bad plan." You sighed, and the sigh fogged faintly against the cool evening air. "But it's my birthday in three days, Kono. Eighteen years old, and I've never once stood in actual dirt. Do you know how insane that is?"
He blinked his round eyes at you, which you had long since learned to interpret as yes, obviously, I have been here the entire time, why are you telling me this like it's news.
You didn't get to finish making your case, because that was the exact moment something enormous and irritable and coated in mud came flying over the tree line, followed at some distance by two men on horseback who were shouting in a way that suggested this was not a friendly race.
You watched, chin still in your hands, as the fleeing shapeβa horse, you realized, a truly furious-looking horse with no riderβthundered off in one direction, and the men gave up the chase and doubled back toward the waterfall instead, toward the tower, toward the one place in this entire kingdom that was not supposed to be findable.
Kono went rigid against your shoulder.
You, if you were being fully honest with yourself, felt something in your chest that was not quite fear. It sat right alongside the fear, close enough to be mistaken for it, but it wasn't fear.
It was closer to finally.
His name, you would learnβthough not for several more extremely tense minutesβwas Martin Edwards, and he arrived through your window the way a cat arrives through a window: badly, loudly, and with absolutely no acknowledgment that he might be intruding.
He tumbled onto your floor in a graceless heap of limbs, dragging a satchel that clinked with something metal, and had approximately one and a half seconds to register that the tower he'd chosen at complete random to hide in was, in fact, occupied, before you brought the singing bowl down over his head with every ounce of strength eighteen years of restless boredom had built into your arms.
The bowl rang out, low and resonant, an actual musical note hanging in the air over the sound of him crumpling sideways into your dried-flower arrangement.
You stood over him, bowl still raised, breathing hard, and felt, for the first time in your entire life, genuinely and thoroughly alive.
He groaned. He was, you noted with some irritation, extremely tall even lying down, all long limbs folded wrong across your floor, and even unconscious his face had the specific, punchable quality of someone who had never once in his life doubted that he was the most charming person in any room he walked into.
Kono skittered down your arm to the floor and approached the stranger with the deep suspicion of a creature sizing up a rival. He sniffed once at Martin's outstretched hand, apparently found it lacking, and turned his back on it with as much dignity as a small dragon draped in mud-splattered iridescent scales could manage.
You dragged the intruderβwith considerable effort, and a truly staggering amount of complaining directed at Kono, who offered zero helpβinto your wardrobe, and shut the door, and sat down hard on your bed with your heart going like a struck drum.
Ruffians and cutthroats, you thought, a little hysterically. Right on schedule.
He woke up loud, which you supposed made sense, given everything else about him so far.
"βokay, okay, I'm awake, I'm awake, get theβ" He kicked the wardrobe door open with a force that sent your good winter coats sliding off their hooks and staggered out into the room with both hands raised, blinking against the lamplight, and then his eyes landed on you, standing across the room with the singing bowl held out in front of you like a shield, and something in his face actually, genuinely, lit up.
"Oh," he hummed. "Hello."
"Don't move," you said.
"I'm not moving." He did not stop moving. His eyes were doing a slow, assessing sweep of the roomβthe window, the wardrobe, you, the bowl, back to youβthat you didn't love the feeling of. "Nice place. Veryβcozy. Homey. Round. You don't get a lot of round rooms."
"I said don't move."
"I'm being extremely still." He took a single, deliberate step sideways, testing you, and you swung the bowl an inch closer to his skull, and he froze with both hands up again, and something that might have been the beginning of respect crossed his face. "Okay. Fair. Noted."
Up close, in better light, he was infuriatingly good-looking in a way you resented on principle. Tallβtaller than anyone had a right to be in a low-ceilinged tower room. This ruffian was blond in a country where you'd never once seen hair that color (not that youβd really seen any other existing humans).
He had this odd and loose, careless confidence that suggested he'd never had to work particularly hard for anything, including, apparently, avoiding capture, since two very large men had chased him halfway across a mountain and he still looked more amused than afraid.
"Who are you," you snarled, "and how did you find this tower?"
"Martin Edwards." He said it like it should mean something to you. When your expression didn't change, an emotion flickered across his faceβannoyance, maybe, or the specific wound of a man whose name usually did land. "You've truly never heard of me."
"I've never heard of anyone. I live in a tower."
"Right. Yes. Fair point, very fair, I did notice theβtower situation." He gestured vaguely at the room, the window, the general concept of your entire life. "Look, I didn't find this place, I was being chased, I saw a hole in a wall of rock, I went through the hole. This was not a planned visit. I have no interest in yourβtower. Your life. Any of it. I just need to lay low for a bit and then I will be very happy to climb right back out that window and never think about any of this again."
You considered him. You considered the satchel, which he'd dropped by the wardrobe door, and which had made a very specific metallic clinking sound when he fell.
"What's in the bag?"
His whole body changedβjust slightly, just for a second, a flicker of genuine alarm before the easy charm slid back over it like a curtain. "Nothing that concerns you."
"It's in my room."
"It's in my possession."
"You're in my tower."
"Okay, fine, guess thatβsβactually a decent point." He exhaled through his nose, glanced at the window, seemed to calculate something, and then said, with the air of a man laying down a very reasonable trump card: "Tell you what. You let me leave, quietly, no fuss, and I forget this entire evening ever happened. Bag included. Everyone wins."
You should have said yes. Laterβmuch later, with the wind in your hair and your heart still going too fast in your chestβyou would think about how easy it would have been to say yes, to open the window, to let him climb back out into the night and never know what you'd almost missed.
Instead you looked past him, out your one round window, at the darkening sky, and you thought about lanterns you'd never seen up close and mountains you'd only ever painted from guesswork, and you heard yourself say, "No."
He blinked. "No?"
"You're going to take me somewhere."
"I am not."
"There's a light show. Lanterns. Every year, on theβ" you almost said my birthday, and swallowed it, some old instinct telling you not to hand a stranger that particular thread to pull. "There's a light in the sky, every year, from the direction of the kingdom. I want to see it up close. You're going to take me, and then you can have your littleβ¦ bag back."
"You don't have my bag."
"I know where you left it," you said, which was true, and gestured with your chin at Kono, who had, in the general chaos, quietly and with great personal satisfaction dragged the satchel across the floor and was now sitting on top of it with the smug posture of a creature who understood exactly what leverage was.
Martin looked at the dragon. The dragon looked at Martin. Something passed between them that you didn't fully understand yet but would come, over the following days, to recognize as the opening shot of a genuinely long and deeply petty war.
"That thing is sitting on my satchel," Martin gasped, in the tone of a man who could not quite believe the indignity of his current situation.
"His name is Kono."
"I don't care what his name is, he is sitting on myβ"
"He's very protective," you said, not entirely truthfully, since Kono's motives had far more to do with spite than protection, but you weren't about to admit that. "So. Lanterns. Then your bag. Then you go wherever it is men with bags full of clinking things go."
Martin looked at you for a long moment. He truly looked, in a way that made you resist the urge to fold your arms over your chest, and then rubbed both hands down his face and groaned like a man who'd already lost an argument he hadn't realized he was having.
"You," he chuckled in what you assume to be sarcasm, "are going to be a problem."
"Probably," you agreed, and found, to your own surprise, that you were smiling.
"For the record," he added, already turning to inspect the window, testing the give of the shutter with one hand, "I don't actually do this. Escort duty. Tour guide. Whatever this is."
"You don't have much choice."
"I have plenty of choice, lady. I'm choosing to be gracious about a bad situation, there's a difference." He glanced back at you, something assessing in the look, like he was recalculating you from scratch now that the singing bowl had been lowered. "How far is this light show, anyway?"
"I don't actually know."
"You don'tβ" He closed his eyes briefly, the particular patience of a man doing math he didn't want to do. "You dragged me into a hostage negotiation for a destination you don't know the distance to."
"It's in the direction of the kingdom. I've watched it every year from the window. It can't be that far."
"'Can't be that far' has gotten men killed, you know."
"You'll live," you said, with far more confidence than you actually possessed, and went to go retrieve your good travelling shoes, leaving him standing by the window looking like a man reconsidering every choice that had led him to this particular evening.
You changed, too, while he waitedβout of the loose sleeping robes you'd been in when he'd fallen through your window and into the good hanbok you'd been saving, the one Mother had commissioned for a birthday you weren't allowed to leave the tower to celebrate.
Pale jeogori embroidered along the collar with thread the color of new leaves, the chima falling in soft, heavy folds you'd never actually walked any real distance in, sash tied the way you'd practiced a hundred times alone in front of a mirror with no one to see it.
It felt strange, dressing for a world you'd never been allowed into. It felt stranger still, catching your own reflection in the dark window glass, to think that you might actually look like you belonged there.
Were youβ¦ scared? No. Surely not. You wanted this. Itβs practically your lifeβs purpose. But what about Mother? She had kept you safe and protected from the evils of that world for all your life and wouldnβt this be taking that protection for granted?Β
"You're stalling," Martin called, from somewhere near the window.
"I'm preparing."
"You've re-tied that sash three times."
"It has to sit correctly or it'll come loose on the climb down."
"It's a piece of fabric, not a structural pillarβ"
"Do you want my help escaping or not?"
That, at least, bought you the silence you needed to finish, smoothing the last fold flat with hands that weren't quite steady, and when you finally turned around he'd gone quiet in a different way, something briefly, helplessly caught in his expression before he covered it with a cough and a very deliberate glance toward the window.
"Ready?" he asked.
"Ready," you said, and meant it more than you expected to.
Getting out of the tower took considerably longer than getting in, mostly because you insisted on doing it via the long braided rope of your own hairβwhich made Martin's expression do something complicated and slightly ill when you explained the general mechanics of your situationβand partly because you stopped four separate times on the way down to look at things. A bird. The particular texture of the moss on the tower's stone base. Your own hands, dirt-smudged for the first time in your life, which you held up in the fading light like they belonged to someone else.
"You're doing something weird with your face," Martin said, from where he was waiting with visibly diminishing patience at the base of the waterfall.
"What thing."
"Theβ" he gestured at your entire self, "βwide-eyed newborn puppy thing. It's very slow."
"I've never touched a river before."
"You've touched water before."
"Not river water. It's cold. It's moving. Did you know it does that? Justβmoves, constantly, going somewhereβ"
"Incredible information. Truly a marvel of the natural world. Can weβ"
"Give me one more minute."
You did not give him one more minute. You gave him closer to ten, crouched at the edge of the water with your skirts hiked up and your bare feet in the current, laughingβactually laughing, a real sound you weren't sure you'd made before, not like this, not from somewhere this deepβwhile Martin stood a respectful distance away with his arms crossed and an expression that was trying very hard to stay annoyed and mostly failing.
"You know," he said, eventually, watching you, "for a girl who apparently thinks the entire world is trying to eat her alive, you're taking this remarkably well."
"I never said the world was trying to eat me."
"You have the exact energy of someone who was told that, yes."
You didn't answer that, because it was uncomfortably accurate, and instead climbed back up onto the bank and reached for the little cloth bag Mother had never let you leave without, purely out of habitβand then remembered you'd left the tower entirely, that Mother was three days out at her own errand, that there was no one to sneak anything past anymore, and the freedom of that thought hit you somewhere just under your ribs hard enough that you had to sit with it a second.
Martin was watching your face do something complicated.
"You okay, Princess?"
You blinked at him. "What did you call me?"
"Princess." He shrugged easily, like he'd been waiting for an excuse. "Means gongju. You know. Lost girl, hidden tower, guarded like she's made of something preciousβyou have to admit it tracks."
"I'm not a princess."
"I didn't say you were. I said it tracks." He was grinning now, delighted with himself in a way that made you want to throw something at him. "There's an actual missing princess, you know. Whole kingdom's been mourning her for eighteen years. Lanterns every year on her birthday, the whole thing. Iβm guessing thatβs what youβre trying to see. Funny coincidence, a girl locked in a tower wanting to see the exact same lanterns."
"Coincidences happen."
"Sure they do." He fell into step beside you, hands tucked behind his head, entirely too pleased with the theory he was clearly not going to let go of. "Or, alternatively, I could just call you 'princess.' Would you prefer that? Since you don't know what it means. I mean, I'm sure a sheltered young lady like yourself, freshly escaped from an entire lifetime in a stone tower, wouldn't be familiar with a word like that. Itβs English. Very obscure. Very advanced."
"I know what it means, I was born here, same as you."
"Do you though? Prove it."
"I'm not proving anything to you."
"Because you can't."
"Because it's beneath me."
"There it is," he said, snapping his fingers, delighted. "Gongju behavior if I've ever seen it."
"I will push you into the river."
"You're welcome to try, princess."
"You know what's funny," Martin said, a little while later, once you'd both fallen into an easier walking rhythm and the sun had dropped low enough to gild the tops of the trees. "You never actually told me your name."
You hesitated. It wasn't that you didn't have oneβMother had given you one, early, though she'd used it so rarely, always preferring darling or sweet girl or, when she was displeased, no name at all, just a long and pointed silenceβit was that saying it out loud to a stranger on your first night outside a tower felt like handing over something you weren't sure yet was safe to hand over.
"I'm not telling you."
"Why not?"
"Because you'll use it against me somehow. You seem like the type."
"I am offended." He didn't sound offended. He sounded thrilled, the way he sounded about most things that gave him new material to work with. "Fine. Keep your mystery. I'll just keep calling you gongju, then, and everyone we meet is going to assume you actually are the missing princess, and it'll be your fault when the whole kingdom starts a rumor."
"Nobody's going to believe that."
"You'd be surprised what people believe about a girl who climbs out of a tower on a rope made of her own hair."
You didn't have a good answer for that, mostly because it was, again, unfairly accurate, and you settled instead for shoving him lightly with your shoulder, which did nothing except make him laugh.
"Say it, then," you said. "Princess. If that's what you're going to call me, I want to actually hear you say the real word, not just the joke version."
He said itβproperly this time, no mockery in it, the vowels landing soft and familiar in a way that startled you a little, like hearing a song you hadn't realized you knew the words to.
"There," he said. "Happy?"
"You're still not calling me that."
"I'm absolutely calling you that. It's efficient. It's accurate, probably. And frankly," he added, glancing sideways at you with something almost gentle underneath the usual smugness, "it suits you better than whatever your actual name is going to turn out to be."
"You don't even know my actual name."
"I don't need to. I've got a working theory and I like it. A sheltered young lady," he said, drawing the words out with exaggerated care, "freshly liberated from a tower, apparently unfamiliar with basic Korean vocabularyβreally, it all fits."
"I am not unfamiliar with basicβ"
"Prove it. What's gongju mean, then, if you know it so well?"
"It means princess, and you know I know that, you're just being insufferable on purpose."
"On purpose and very successfully," he agreed, entirely too pleased with himself, and you gave up trying to win the argument and let yourself, instead, enjoy the specific, unfamiliar pleasure of being teased by someone who clearly wasn't trying to hurt you with it.
You did not push him into the river, mostly because you were fairly sure you'd fall in with him, but you thought about it, hard, the entire rest of the walk, while he hummed something tuneless and infuriating under his breath and Kono rode along in the fold of your sleeve making small disapproving noises every time Martin so much as glanced in your direction.
You noticed, though you weren't going to say it out loud, that he never actually stopped. Princess. Not once, the rest of that day, or the day after, or any of the days that came after that. It stuck the way nicknames only stick when the person using them has decided, somewhere below the joking, that they mean it.
The wanted poster was nailed to a tree at the first crossroads you came to, curling slightly at the corners from weather, and you might have walked right past it if Martin hadn't gone abruptly, suspiciously quiet beside you.
You looked. Then you looked again, closer, and had to physically bite down on the inside of your cheek to keep from laughing.
It was, unmistakably, himβsame jaw, same insufferable eyebrows, same general air of a man who thought quite highly of himselfβexcept that whoever had drawn it had rendered his mouth as a row of crooked, gap-toothed, wildly uneven teeth, snaggled in every direction like a fence that had lost a fight with a storm.
"That is not accurate," Martin yelled, very fast, snatching the poster down off the tree before you could get a proper look.
"That isβthat is artistic license, that is a hack sketch artist with a grudge and no talent, my teeth areβ" he actually opened his mouth to demonstrate, tilting his head back, and you had to admit, unwillingly, that his teeth were in fact very straight, surprisingly white, entirely unremarkable in the best possible way. "See? Perfect. Immaculate. I have never once in my life had a complaint about my teeth, I get compliments on my teethβ"
"From who?"
"Fromβpeople. Women. Discerning women with excellent taste who appreciate a goodβ"
"It says here you're a wanted thief," you hummed, reading over his shoulder now that he'd lowered the poster in his outrage, "with a reward ofβ" you did the math and had to stop and reread it, "βthat is a genuinely enormous amount of money."
"It's inflated. That's aβthat's a gross exaggeration of my worth, I'm not worth that much, this is clearly aβ"
"You're arguing that you're worth less than a wanted poster says?"
"I'm arguing that the number is inaccurate, there's a difference, the number is clearly designed to encourage overzealous bounty hunting, it's a scare tacticβ"
"So you agree you're worth stealing."
"That is notβthat is not what I said, you're twisting my words, this is exactly the kind of thing I was worried about when you insisted on coming along, you're going to misquote me to guards at some point and get us bothβ"
"I'm just reading what's written."
He scoffed and kicked a rock. "You're reading it with inflection."
"I'm reading it with my normal voice."
"You said 'genuinely enormous amount of money' like it was a personal insult to me specifically."
"You seem more upset about the teeth than the wanted part."
"Because the wanted part is accurate," he said, with the flat honesty of a man too distracted by dental slander to bother lying. "I am wanted. I did steal something. The teeth, though. The teeth are slander."
"What did you steal?"
He hesitatedβand it was the first genuinely unguarded pause you'd seen from him all dayβand then folded the poster into quarters and shoved it into his satchel with a little more force than necessary. "Doesn't matter. Ancient history. Water under the bridge."
"You stole it approximately six hours ago."
"Extremely ancient, in relative terms." He set off walking again, faster than before, and you had to jog a few steps to catch up, Kono digging tiny claws into your shoulder to keep his balance.
"You're not going to tell me."
"I am not."
"Is it the crown," you guessed, because you'd caught the edge of gold in the satchel earlier, glinting when Kono had dragged it across the floor, and you watched his shoulders go very slightly, very deliberately stiff.
"No," he said, in a tone that meant yes, and you decided, generously, to let him have it, mostly because you were far more interested in the actual horse that had just come thundering around the bend in the road, nostrils flaring, eyes locked on Martin with an expression of pure, personal, long-simmering rage.
"Oh, no," Martin said.
"Is thatβ"
"That is Woojoo, yes, that is my horse, that is a long, complicated relationshipβ"
Woojoo did not stop for pleasantries. He came at Martin like a man settling a debt, and the next several minutes dissolved into a genuinely spectacular chase around a small clearing that involved Martin climbing a tree, Woojoo standing guard at the base of said tree with the patient menace of a creature who had all the time in the world, and you sitting on a fallen log with Kono, watching, thoroughly entertained.
"He's not usually like this," Martin called down, from somewhere in the upper branches.
"He seems very consistent, actually."
"Okay, he's exactly like this, every time, it'sβwe have history, this horse and I, it's complicatedβ"
"He's a horse."
"He's vindictive, is what he is, he's been trying to get me arrested for two years, that's not normal horse behavior, that's a personal vendettaβ"
Kono made a small, delighted chattering noise beside you, which you were beginning to understand meant something close to finally, someone gets it, and when you glanced down at him he was watching Woojoo with what could only be described as newfound professional respect.
"What exactly did you do to him," you called up, watching Woojoo pace a slow, deliberate circle around the base of the tree, occasionally rearing to paw at the lowest branch just to remind Martin he had options.
"I didn't do anything, he's just been like this since I acquired him."
"You stole him."
"I acquired him. There's a nuance."
"From who?"
"From a royal stable, technically, but in my defense he was clearly unhappy there, high-strung, difficult, the stablemaster hated himβI did him a favor, honestly, and this is the thanks I get, two years of relentless, targeted footwear-based revengeβ"
Woojoo, as if personally offended by the retelling, reared up again with a furious whinny and got one hoof solidly against the trunk hard enough to shake the branch Martin was gripping, sending down a small shower of leaves and one extremely undignified yelp.
"He understood that," you gasped and shook your head. "He understood every word of that and he took offense."
"Horses don't understand language."
"This one might."
"This one is a menace, is what he is," Martin said, adjusting his grip with the particular caution of a man who had recently reconsidered his life choices, "a genuine menace who has decided, for reasons known only to himself, that his sole purpose on this earth is making my life difficultβ"
You decided, watching the standoff continue with no signs of resolving itself, that this was likely to go on for some time if left entirely to the two of them, and so you climbed down off your log, brushed off your skirts, and walked directly up to Woojoo with far more confidence than you actually felt.
He swung his great head toward you, ears pinned, nostrils flaring, and for a moment you thought you'd badly misjudged the situationβand then, slowly, his ears came up, and he leaned his head down toward you with something almost curious, blowing a warm breath across your palm when you held it out.
"There," you murmured. "See? I'm not the one who stole an apple from your feed bag."
"You heard about the apple thingβ" Martin's voice, muffled and betrayed, from somewhere above.
Woojoo made a low, satisfied sort of noise, nudging his nose against your shoulder, and you had the distinct impression, ridiculous as it was, that you had just been recruited onto a very specific and very committed team.
It took another twenty minutes, a great deal of undignified negotiating, andβeventuallyβyou stepping in to physically stand between horse and man with your hands raised in a gesture of peace, before Woojoo agreed, with visible reluctance, to a temporary truce, on the conditionβas far as you could interpret from a horse's expressionβthat he got to walk close enough to occasionally, "accidentally," step on the back of Martin's boot.
"This is humiliating," Martin muttered, as you all set off again, horse and dragon flanking either side of you like a pair of extremely judgmental honor guards.
"I think it's going great," you said, and meant it.
The hanok appeared out of the trees just as the light was going properly gray, low and wide-roofed in the old style, warm lantern-light spilling from its paper windows, smoke curling from a chimney with the smell of something roasting.
"Absolutely not," Martin said, the second he clocked it. "No. We're walking past this. This is a place I have specifically, personally, at great cost, learned to walk past."
"Why?"
"Because it's full of the single worst collection of degenerates in this entire kingdom, and every single one of them would sell me out for a fraction of that reward money without blinking."
"So we're not going in."
"We are absolutely not going in."
You went in.
In your defense, you hadn't fully decided to defy him so much as your feet had simply kept walking while your brain was still weighing the pros and cons, and by the time Martin caught up to grab your sleeve you were already three steps through the door. Into a low, smoke-hazed room packed with the strangest assembly of people you had ever seen in your entireβadmittedly very limitedβexperience of people.
There was a man built like a small mountain, missing most of his teeth, gently carving what appeared to be a delicate wooden hairpin. There was someone in the corner whose face you genuinely could not parse in the low lightβtoo many angles, somehow, like looking at a person through cracked glassβquietly mending a fan.
There were twin brothers arm-wrestling with murderous focus over what turned out, on closer inspection, to be a single dumpling. Someone had a pet weasel draped around their neck like a scarf. Someone else appeared to be knitting something with visibly too many needles. The whole room smelled like woodsmoke and old rice wine and something underneath that you couldn't place and didn't especially want to.
Every single head in the room turned when the door swung shut behind you.
"We're leaving," Martin said, very quietly, into your ear.
"Is that Martin Edwards?" said the mountain-sized man with the hairpin, in a voice that dropped the temperature of the room several degrees.
"No," Martin said.
"That's definitely him," said someone else.
"That is notβokay, fine, hi, yes, hello everyone, lovely establishment, we're just passing throughβ"
What followed was, by your private accounting, one of the strangest and best evenings of your entire life.
It started with the reward moneyβsomeone in the back producing a slightly more accurate wanted poster, teeth and all, and passing it around with escalating commentary, the twins, apparently named Seonghyeon and Juhoon, abandoning their dumpling war entirely to lean over and study Martin's face against the drawing with academic seriousnessβand slid, somehow, without your ever quite catching the exact moment it happened, into a full-throated, half-drunk, wildly enthusiastic taunting song, the whole room joining in verse by verse, about every humiliating thing anyone in the establishment had ever heard about Martin Edwards.
The man with the weasel started it, banging a wooden cup against the table for rhythm, and it snowballed from there the way these things always seemed to in a room full of people who'd clearly been waiting years for an excuse.
Oh, the boy who came from nowhere, with his smile and his fine clothesβthinks he's someone, thinks he's special, thinks the whole wide kingdom knows,
sang the man with the weasel, and the twins picked it up without missing a beat, still slightly out of breath from the dumpling war,
but we remember when he begged us for a bowl of rice, a place to sleepβnow he struts around in silk scraps calling himself something deep!
"That is one time," Martin said, to no one in particular, to the entire room, to the universe. "That was one specific winter,that is not a fair representative sample of myβ"
Nobody was listening. The person with too many needles had abandoned her knitting entirely to conduct the room like an orchestra, and Namjoon's booming baritone came in over the top of everyone else's,
Oh, his teeth are crooked as a fence line, oh, his hair's a rooster's crest, and the last time that he tried to smolder a fisherman's wife laughed so hard she fell in the river and had to be fished out herself β
which was, you gathered, not even remotely true and possibly the single funniest thing anyone had said all evening, judging by the way Martin's whole face went scarlet and the room dissolved into fresh, delighted chaos.
"That last one isn't even trueβ" Martin tried, over the singing, and got roundly ignored, and you watched, absolutely delighted, from your seat on an overturned barrel, as an entire room of strangers dismantled him verse by gleeful verse, and did not, notably, join inβnot because you weren't tempted, but because you found it far funnier to simply watch his face while it happened, the specific, put-upon suffering of a man who could not decide whether to laugh or storm out and kept landing, over and over, on some helpless combination of both.
There was something underneath the teasing, too, that you only half caughtβa warmth in it, the particular rough affection of people who'd known someone a long time and had earned the right to be cruel to him in a way that was really just another word for fond.
Namjoon clapped Martin on the shoulder hard enough to stagger him mid-verse and called him boy in a voice gone suddenly soft under all the noise.
You found yourself wondering, not for the first time that night, exactly how long ago it had been that a much younger Martin Edwards had first shown up in a place like this with nowhere else to go, and exactly what had happened to him before that, that a room full of thieves and degenerates had ended up feeling, to him, like the closest thing to family he had.
You filed the thought away to ask about later. You had a feeling it wasn't a question he'd answer easily, or sober, or with an audience.
"You're not even going to defend me," he said to you, mid-chorus, over the noise.
"I'm having a wonderful time."
"That is betrayal, that's what that isβ"
"They're not even wrong about the teeth thing."
"They are entirely wrong about the teeth thing, my teeth are fineβ"
Somewhere around the fourth verse, the man with the hairpinβwhose name, you'd gathered, was something like Namjoon, though it was hard to be sure over the singingβleaned across the table toward you with the particular intensity of someone who had decided you were the most interesting thing in the room.
"You," he pointed. "You have good energy. You've never danced on a table before, have you?"
"I've never been in a room before," you said, honestly, which seemed to delight him even further.
"Well," he said, standing, extending a huge, hairpin-carving hand toward you with genuine ceremony, "there's a first time."
You should have said no. You thought, distantly, of Mother's voice, of every warning about the danger and filth of the outside world, and then you thought about how good it had felt, hours ago, to have your bare feet in a river for the first time in your life, and you took the enormous man's hand and let him haul you, laughing, up onto the low wooden table.
It turned out you were, against every expectation, a genuinely excellent dancerβeighteen years of solitary practice in a round tower room had to be good for somethingβand the room roared its approval as you spun, skirts of your hanbok flaring out around your ankles, hair flowing, laughing so hard your ribs ached.
Martin stood below the table with an expression that had stopped being annoyed several minutes ago and had settled into something else entirely, something he was clearly trying very hard not to let show on his face and failing at almost completely.
The twins abandoned all pretense of arm-wrestling entirely to bang out a rhythm on the tabletop with the flats of their hands, and the man with the weasel produced, from some hidden pocket, a small reed flute he turned out to play with startling skill, weaving a quick, bright melody underneath the room's continued heckling of Martin, who had by now given up defending his teeth entirely and switched to a full, aggrieved commentary on the general injustice of his evening.
"This is not what I agreed to when I climbed through that window," he called up at you, though he was smiling despite himself, that same helpless, undone expression creeping further across his face with every spin you took. "I signed up for hiding. Quietly. In a tower. Notβthis. Not a full musical indictment of my character followed by you personally providing the evening's entertainment."
"You're welcome to join me," you called back, breathless, delighted, and watched with enormous satisfaction as his face went briefly, thoroughly panicked.
"Absolutely not."
"Coward."
"Strategist. There's a meaningful difference between the twoβ"
Namjoon, still clapping along from below, tipped his head back and roared with laughter loud enough to rattle the paper windows, and even Kono, perched safely on a high shelf out of the way of the chaos, seemed to have relaxed enough to bob his small head faintly along with the flute's rhythm, which you filed away as further evidence, alongside the nose-attack yet to come, that his feelings about Martin were considerably more complicated than his usual sniffing disdain let on.
It was, of course, at that exact momentβyou spinning, laughing, glowing in the lanternlight, framed perfectly in the hanok's single paper windowβthat the door burst open.
Mother stood in the frame, still dressed for travel, face utterly, terribly still, and every single sound in the room died at once.
You would replay the next thirty seconds for years afterward and never fully be able to piece together the order they happened in.
Mother's eyes found yours across the room and something in them cracked openβnot relief, you understood, even in the moment, even through the roaring in your ears. Not relief. Fury, dressed up as fear, the way it always was.
"You," Mother said, and her voice, even pitched low, even across a room gone suddenly silent, carried the way it always had, carved out of something colder than the room's actual temperature. She didn't shout. She never shouted; shouting would have meant losing something, and Mother did not lose things, she simply took them back. "Get down from there. Now."
You didn't move. You were aware, distantly, of how strange it wasβthat a woman who had raised you for eighteen years, whose voice had shaped nearly every rule you'd ever lived by, could stand in a doorway and still make your whole body want to obey before your mind had caught up to deciding whether it should.
"I was justβ"
"I don't care what you were just. Look at you. Look at what he's done to you already." Mother's eyes flicked, briefly, murderously, to Martin, standing frozen below the table. "This is exactly what I warned you about. Exactly. One night outside that tower and already you'reβ" she gestured, sharp and contemptuous, at the whole scene, the hanok, the strangers, your loosened hair, "β this."
"This is the most fun I've had in my entire life," you said, and heard your own voice shake only slightly.
Something in Mother's face did something complicatedβnot softened, not exactly, but shifted, the fury underneath it briefly, dangerously exposed. "That tower kept you safe."
"That tower kept me contained."
"There she is," said someoneβone of the guards behind Mother, you realized, a whole detail of them, come looking for the man on the wanted poster and finding, instead, considerably more than they'd bargained for.
The room dissolved into chaos.
Later, you would understand that half the hanok's patrons had their own reasons to want no part of a run-in with royal guards, and so what happened next was less an act of loyalty to you or Martin specifically and more a matter of shared, practical self-interestβbut in the moment it felt like nothing short of a miracle.
The mountain of a man with the hairpin suddenly hauling a table sideways to block the door, the twins scattering rice wine across the floor to send the first guard through it skidding, the person with too many needles somehow managing to tangle an entire coil of yarn around someone's ankles.
"Move, moveβ" Martin had you by the wrist, hauling you off the table and through a low doorway at the back of the hanok you hadn't even noticed, past a stack of firewood that Namjoon shoved aside with one huge hand to reveal a narrow black gap in the wall, barely wide enough for the two of you, sloping down into the dark.
"In, go, goβ" and then you were falling, more than climbing, into a tunnel that smelled of packed earth and old stone, Martin's hand fused to your wrist. Kono was a frantic weight against your collarbone, the sound of shouting and splintering wood fading fast above you as the two of you half-ran, half-stumbled through absolute blackness.
The tunnel was narrower than it had looked from the mouth of itβlow enough in places that Martin had to duck, cursing under his breath every time his shoulder caught stone, and twice the passage forked without warning, no light to guide the choice, nothing but Martin's hand tightening around yours and a muttered "left, I think, leftβ" that you had no way of verifying and every reason to simply trust.
Somewhere behind you, muffled through packed earth, you heard the unmistakable scrape of the firewood being shoved aside a second time, and a voiceβnot Mother's, one of the guards, sharp and close in a way that made your stomach dropβcalling that they'd found the passage.
"Faster," Martin breathed, and you didn't need telling twice, your bare palm scraping stone as you half-felt your way forward, heart slamming so hard you could feel it in your throat. The darkness pressed close enough on every side that for one disorienting stretch you lost all sense of which way was even forward anymore, trusting nothing but the grip of his hand and the sound of his breathing just ahead of you.
A light bobbed somewhere behindβtorchlight, catching the tunnel wall in a brief orange smear before you rounded another bend and lost it againβand you thought, with a clarity that cut cleanly through the panic, they're going to catch us, and then, right on its heels, absurdly, I don't even care, this is the most alive I have ever felt in my entire life.
You should have been terrified.
Some distant, sensible part of you understood that you were, technically, terrifiedβMother's face, the guards, the very real danger of the last thirty secondsβand yet underneath the fear was something so bright and enormous it eclipsed nearly everything else, something that had been building all day, all evening, every single moment since your feet first touched river water, and it broke open now in the pitch dark of that tunnel as something you could only describe as pure, uncut joy.
You were laughing. You realized it somewhere in the second minute of running, blind, hand in hand with a wanted thief, chased by your own mother's guards, and you were laughing so hard you could barely breathe, and Martinβsomewhere ahead of you in the dark, breathless himselfβstarted laughing too, and the two of you burst out of the far end of the tunnel into open moonlit air still half-doubled over, gasping, giddy, alive in a way you didn't have words for yet.
You collapsed against a fallen log at the tunnel's mouth, chest heaving, hair a wild mess around your shoulders, and looked up at the starsβmore of them than you'd ever seen from your tower window, spilled out edge to edge across the whole enormous skyβand thought, with a clarity that startled you: this. This is what I wanted.
"You," Martin said, still catching his breath beside you, staring at you like he was seeing something for the first time, "are a genuinely terrifying person."
"I danced on a table."
"You incited a riot."
"I think that was mostly you."
"No, that wasβokay, that was a little me, but youβ" he gestured at you, helplessly, at your wrecked hair and your flushed face and the grin you couldn't have wiped off if you tried, "βyou're supposed to be the sheltered one. The tower girl. And instead you're out here dancing on tables and outrunning royal guards on your first day of freedom like you were made for it."
"Maybe I was."
Something shifted in his face when you said thatβquick, unguarded, gone almost before you could catch itβand for a second neither of you said anything at all, just sat there in the moonlight with your shoulders nearly touching, breathing hard, the tunnel's dark mouth still gaping open behind you.
"Princess," he said, quieter now, no teasing in it at all.
"That's not my name."
"I know." He was still looking at you. "Doesn't mean it's not true."
You let the silence sit for a moment, the two of you still catching your breath, the tunnel's dark mouth gaping open behind you like something that had swallowed the version of yourself who'd walked into that hanok an hour ago and spat out someone slightly different.
"Can I ask you something," you said, eventually.
"You're going to anyway."
"That man. Namjoon. He called you boy like he'd known you a long time."
Something in Martin's face shuttered, just slightly, the easy grin dimming a few degrees without fully disappearing. "Long time's a strong way to put it."
"How long?"
He was quiet long enough that you thought he wasn't going to answer at all, picking at a loose thread on his sleeve with more focus than the thread deserved.
"I grew up in an orphanage," he said finally, not looking at you. "Not a nice one. The kind that stops feeding you the second you're old enough to feed yourself, more or less. I left when I was about twelve, lived rough for a while, and that placeβthat hanok, all those people you just watched sing an entire ballad about my teethβthat was the first place that ever fed me without asking anything back the first time I walked in half-starved and half my current size. So. Long time. Longer than I usually admit to strangers who hit me with singing bowls."
"I'm not a stranger anymore."
"No," he agreed, glancing at you sideways, something almost surprised in it, like he was only just now noticing that fact himself. "I suppose you're not."
"Is that why you steal things? Because nobody ever gave you anything, so you decided to just take it instead?"
"That's very poetic. Did you rehearse that."
"I'm asking a real question."
He exhaled, long, and looked back up at the stars instead of at you. "Something like that, probably. I used to tell myself it was about the money. One good score, enough to disappear somewhere nobody's ever heard the name Martin Edwards, buy myself an island, live like a king who answers to nobody."
He shrugged, and the shrug didn't quite land the way he probably wanted it to. "Lately I've started to suspect it was never really about the money at all. Might've just been about proving I could have something. Anything. That nobody could take away from me the way everything got taken when I was a kid."
You didn't say anything right away. You thought about eighteen years in a round tower, about a woman who called your safety love and meant, underneath it, control, about how you'd never once had anything that was fully, unquestionably yours eitherβnot your name, not your time, not even, until tonight, your own two feet standing wherever they wanted to stand.
"I think," you said slowly, "we might have more in common than you'd expect from a lost girl and a thief."
"You admit it, then. Princess."
"I admit nothing. I'm making an observation about orphaned longing, don't twist it into something else."
He laughed at thatβa real laugh, surprised out of himβand some of the tightness went out of his shoulders. "Orphaned longing. You really did rehearse that."
"I did not."
"You absolutely did, you've been sitting on that phrase since the tunnel."
"I have never sat on a phrase in my life," you said, with as much dignity as you could manage, and he laughed again, and the two of you sat there a while longer in the moonlight, not saying much else, letting the quiet settle into something that felt less like the awkward silence of strangers and more like the comfortable kind that came, usually, from people who'd known each other a great deal longer than one very strange day.
The next two days passed the way you imagined a fever mightβbright and disorienting and slightly unreal, every hour crowded with more new things than you'd experienced in the previous eighteen years combined.
You learned that Martin snored, faintly, when he slept sitting up against a tree, and that Woojoo had apparently made it his personal mission to step on his boots at every possible opportunity for the rest of what you assumed would be their entire acquaintance.
You learned that Kono had strong opinions about which berries were safe to eat and communicated them via a truly impressive range of disapproving noises. You learned the names of three separate mountain ranges, none of which matched the ones you'd painted from imagination, and foundβto your surpriseβthat you liked the real ones better.
You found a stream on the first afternoon, cold and clear and shallow enough to wade into without fear, and spent nearly an hour there simply standing in it, letting the current pull at the hem of your hanbok, while Martin sat on the bank pretending not to watch you and failing at it almost entirely.
When you splashed himβdeliberately, gleefully, without an ounce of remorseβhe retaliated with such wounded overcommitment that the two of you ended up soaked through within minutes, both of you laughing too hard to properly aim, Kono shrieking indignantly from a dry rock where he'd wisely relocated at the first sign of hostilities, and Woojoo watching the entire spectacle from the treeline with what you could only describe as profound equine disappointment in both of you.
You learned, too, in quieter moments, the shape of things Martin didn't say out loud.
The way he went very still and unusually gentle whenever you flinched at a loud noise, some old tower-bred instinct you hadn't fully shaken; the way he always, without seeming to think about it, put himself slightly between you and the road whenever another traveler passed.
The way he never once, not even once, asked why a girl who'd apparently never left a tower before knew so much about anatomy or herbs or the exact temperature at which honey turned to poison in the wrong hands, information you'd absorbed purely from Mother's paranoid insistence on preparing you for dangers that had never once, until this week, actually arrived.
You also learned, gradually, and against your own better judgment, that you liked Martin Edwards considerably more than you'd planned to.
He tried the smolder on the second evening, apropos of nothing, while you were both crouched by a small campfire waiting for a rabbit he'd insisted, with wild overconfidence, that he knew how to properly cook.
You caught him doing it out of the corner of your eye firstβa slow, deliberate turn of his head toward you, chin dropping slightly, eyes going half-lidded and soft in a way that was clearly meant to be devastating, one eyebrow lifting with the practiced precision of a man who had, you suspected, spent real time perfecting this exact expression in the reflection of still water.
You stared at him.
He held the look.
You kept staring.
He held it a little longer, jaw set, the corner of his mouth doing something you assumed was supposed to read as rakish,and you watched, fascinated, as the muscles around his eye began, very slightly, to twitch with the effort of maintaining it.
"What are you doing," you said finally.
The smolder collapsed instantly, entirely, like a tent losing its center pole. "Nothing."
"You were doing something with your face."
"I was not doing anything with my face, that's just my face, that's how my face looksβ"
"Your face looked like you were having some kind of episode."
"That," Martin said, with wounded dignity, turning very deliberately back to the fire, "is called charisma, and it has worked on every singleβyou know what, never mind. Forget it. Rabbit's probably done."
"Try it again."
He looked at you, suspicious. "Why."
"I want to see if it's worse the second time or if that was just a fluke."
"It is not going to be worse, it is going to be exactly as devastating as the first time, I simply chose not to fully commit to it because I was distracted by the rabbitβ"
"Prove it."
He set his jaw, visibly gathering himself, and tried againβchin dropping, eyes half-lidding, that same eyebrow rising with what was clearly meant to be effortless, smoldering confidenceβand made it a full three seconds before a piece of ash popped from the fire close enough to his knee that he flinched, hard, breaking the whole expression apart into a startled yelp that had absolutely nothing rakish about it whatsoever.
You laughed so hard you had to set down the stick you'd been roasting your portion of rabbit on, doubling over, and Martin sat there looking deeply, personally betrayed by an ember.
"That doesn't count," he said, with the flat, aggrieved certainty of a man who knew perfectly well that it counted completely. "That was an unrelated incident. The face itself was flawless right up until the interruption."
"I've genuinely never seen anything less flawless in my life."
"You've been alive for four days outside a tower, your knowledge is extremely limitedβ"
"I've seen Woojoo make a more convincing case for himself."
"Now you're just being cruel."
"I'm being honest," you said, wiping at your eyes, and he huffed, and threw a small twig at you that you batted easily out of the air, and the two of you settled back into an easy quiet, the fire popping softly between you, Woojoo a dark, watchful shape at the edge of the clearing, apparently satisfied enough with the evening's proceedings to have stopped glaring, for once.
The rabbit was not, in fact, done, nor would it ever really achieve a state you could confidently call cooked, and you ate it anyway, sitting close enough to the fire that your shoulders kept brushing, and somewhere in the space of that mealβburnt, underdone, genuinely one of the worst things you'd ever eaten and yet somehow, impossibly, one of your favorite meals of your entire lifeβyou caught yourself watching the firelight move across his face and thinking, with a lurch you weren't at all prepared for, oh. Oh, no.
Kono, curled in your lap, looked up at you with an expression you were beginning to read with alarming fluency, and it said, quite clearly: I saw that. We are going to discuss this later.
"Shut up," you told him, out loud, and Martin glanced over.
"I didn't say anything."
"Not you." You nodded down at Kono, who flicked his tail smugly. "Him."
"That thing has never liked me."
"He doesn't like anyone."
"He likes you."
"I raised him from an egg, that's different."
"Sure." Martin was smiling now, small and real, none of the practiced charm from earlier, just something quieter underneath it. "He's very protective. It's actually a little sweet. In aβweirdly feral, judgmental sort of way."
"Don't call my dragon feral."
"I would never," he said, entirely unconvincingly, and you laughed, and Kono made a noise of deep personal offense, and somewhere above you the first stars were coming out over a sky that would, tomorrow night, on the night of your birthday, fill entirely with gold.
The village you passed through the next morning was small and half-asleep, a scatter of tile-roofed houses along a single dusty road, a well at the center where two old women stood gossiping over their buckets, a market just beginning to set up its stalls in the cool early lightβand you stood at the edge of it for a long moment, just looking, before Martin had to physically steer you forward by the shoulder.
"You're doing the thing again."
"I've never seen a market before."
"You've never seen anything before, that's becoming a running theme of this trip." But he said it gently, none of his usual bite in it, and let you drift from stall to stall at your own paceβa woman selling dried persimmons strung on twine, a man with a cart of polished wooden combs, a girl not much younger than you hawking little clay bells that chimed high and sweet when you touched them.
You bought nothing, because you had no money, a fact that seemed to strike Martin as personally intolerable the moment he noticed you eyeing a small painted fan for the third time.
"Here," he said, and before you could stop him he'd produced a string of coins from somewhere inside his jacketβyou didn't ask where, and strongly suspected you didn't want to knowβand pressed them into the fan-seller's hand with the easy, practiced charm of a man who did this sort of thing often, emerging a moment later to hand you the fan with a small, exaggerated bow. "For the gongju."
"You don't have to do that."
"I know I don't have to. I'm choosing to. There's a difference, I keep telling you this."
You turned the fan over in your handsβpainted with a scene of cranes over a lake, delicate, nothing like the practical, sturdy things Mother had ever allowed youβand felt something in your chest go warm and a little overwhelmed, the specific ache of being given something small and unnecessary and entirely, purely kind.
"Thank you," you said, and meant it more than the words could really carry.
"Don't get used to it," Martin said, though his ears had gone faintly pink again, the way they did whenever you caught him being sincere. "I have a reputation to maintain. Ruthless. Self-interested. Very hard to impress."
"You just bought a stranger a fan."
"I bought you a fan, that's different, you're notβ" he seemed to catch himself, some thought crossing his face he clearly hadn't meant to say out loud, and cleared his throat instead. "Anyway. We should keep moving. Overlook's still a few hours off, and I'd like to actually get you there with enough daylight to see the view properly."
You let him change the subject, mostly because you weren't sure you were ready either to examine what he'd almost said, but you tucked the fan carefully into your sleeve, next to Kono, who eyed it with mild suspicion before apparently deciding it posed no threat to his position and settling back down.
The two of you left the village with Woojoo laden down, somewhat improbably, with a small sack of persimmons Martin had also boughtβ"for the horse," he'd said, unconvincingly, though you both knew perfectly well who was going to end up eating most of themβand walked the rest of the morning in an easy, comfortable quiet, broken only occasionally by Martin pointing out landmarks, or you asking questions about the world that he answered, more and more, without any of the teasing he'd led with the day before.
"Can I ask you something," you said, somewhere around midday, watching the road unspool ahead of you toward hills that were, slowly, beginning to look less like mountains and more like the gentler rise of land near a coast.
"You keep asking me that like I have a choice."
"Why haven't you left? You could've, a dozen times by now. You've got your satchel, you've got a truce with Woojoo, you could've slipped off in the night and I'd never have caught you."
He was quiet for a moment, watching the road rather than you. "I've thought about it."
"And?"
"And I keep not doing it," he said, simply, like the answer surprised him as much as it seemed to surprise you. "Which is new. Historically I'm very good at leaving. It's sort of my whole thing. Get in, get what I need, get out before anyone gets attached, especially me." He glanced sideways at you, something wry and a little helpless in it. "You're making that considerably more difficult than usual, gongju."
You didn't have a response for thatβnot one you trusted yourself to say out loud, anywayβso you reached over instead and took his hand, the way you had at the tunnel's mouth, easy and instinctive, and he let you, lacing his fingers through yours without missing a step, and the two of you walked the rest of the afternoon that way, hands linked, saying nothing else about it at all.
You reached the overlook above the harbor just as the sun was beginning its long slide toward the water, the whole kingdom spread out below you in a way you'd only ever seen painted, and painted badly, from your own imaginationβthe palace roofs catching the last light, the sea beyond the harbor gone molten copper, boats coming in for evening with their sails full and orange.
"There it is," Martin said, quieter than you'd heard him yet, standing close beside you at the edge of the outlook. "Home of your mysterious lantern people."
You didn't answer right away. You were looking at the palaceβthe actual palace, not the vague shape you'd always imagined from your tower window, but real, close enough now to make out individual roof tiles, individual windows catching fire in the sunsetβand something in your chest was doing something you didn't entirely have language for. A pull. An ache, low and old, like a bruise you hadn't known was there until someone pressed it.
"You okay?" Martin asked.
"I don't know," you said, honestly. "It feels likeβ" you struggled for it, and gave up trying to find the exact shape of the feeling, settling instead for the closest true thing you had. "It feels like coming home to a place I've never been."
He was quiet for a moment, watching you rather than the view.
"In all honesty," he said, "I think you're going to like it there. Whatever it turns out to be, wherever it turns out you're from. I think the whole world's better with you loose in it, gongju. Bowl and all."
You looked at him with the last of the sunset gold across his face, that ridiculous, sincere, unguarded expression he clearly hadn't meant to let you seeβand you thought about tunnels and rivers and burnt rabbit and a hanok full of strangers singing about his teeth, and you thought, with the same clarity you'd had at the mouth of that tunnel two nights ago: this. I want this. Whatever this is turning into, I want it.
"Come on," you said instead, because you weren't brave enough yet to say the other thing, and reached for his hand, lacing your fingers through his like it was the easiest, most obvious motion in the world. "There's a boat down there with our name on it. I have a light show to see."
Below you, the first lanterns of the evening were already beginning to lift off the water, small and gold and multiplying, rising slow and steady into a sky gone the deep, glowing blue of early darkβand somewhere out past the harbor, thousands more were waiting to join them, waiting, though you didn't know it yet, for you.
Martin's hand tightened around yours.
"After you, princess," he said, and the two of you started down the hill together, toward the water, toward the light.
The boat Martin foundβborrowed, he insisted, with a straight face that fooled absolutely no one, from a dock crowded with a dozen identical little wooden craft, all of them clearly rented out for exactly this evening, exactly this purposeβwas small and low and smelled faintly of fish, and rocked alarmingly when you first climbed in, enough that you grabbed for his arm and he grabbed for the side of the boat and Kono, riding in your collar, made a noise of profound and specific betrayal at being jostled.
"Careful," Martin said, steadying you with a hand at your waist that lingered maybe half a second longer than strictly necessary, and you were fairly sure, from the way his ears had gone slightly pink, that he'd noticed it too.
Woojoo, denied entry to the boat on account of being an entire horse, watched the proceedings from the dock with an expression of deep personal injury, and had to be bribed with the promise of an extra ration of feed before he'd agree to wait, tail swishing, ears pinned, radiating the specific fury of a creature left behind on the one night that mattered.
"He'll forgive you eventually," you said, as Martin pushed off from the dock with a long oar, the little boat gliding out onto water gone glassy and still with the coming dark.
"He has never forgiven me for anything in his entire life. I stole an apple from his feed bag once, two years ago, and I am fairly sure he still brings it up in whatever passes for a horse's internal monologue."
"Poetic justice."
"You're supposed to be on my side."
"I'm on Kono's side. And apparently Woojoo's. You seem to have accumulated a great many enemies for one man."
"They're not enemies," Martin said, settling the oar and letting the boat drift, "they'reβcreatures with very high standards who happen to have chosen me as their personal project. It's a compliment, really, if you think about it correctly."
"I don't think that's what a compliment is."
"You'll come around."
The kingdom had gone properly dark behind you now, the palace a black shape against a sky just beginning to prickle with stars, and the harbor water held every scattered lantern-light in perfect, trembling reflection, so that it felt, floating there, like you were suspended between two skiesβone above, one below, and you in the exact still center of both.
"It's almost time," you said, quiet, watching the palace. Something in your chest had gone tight and expectant, the same old ache from the overlook, except closer now, close enough that you thought you might be able to name it if you sat with it a little longer.
Martin didn't say anything. He'd gone still too, watching you rather than the palace, in a way you were becoming increasingly, helplessly aware of.
And then the first note soundedβa low horn, from somewhere within the palace walls, carrying clean and mournful across the waterβand the sky above the towers began, all at once, to fill with gold.
all those days, watching from the windows
You had watched this exact sight, every year of your life, from a single round window a mile up a mountainside, small and distant and never once close enough to feel the heat of the paper or hear the soft rush of a thousand wicks catching flame at once. You had painted it, badly, from memory, over and over, never quite able to get the specific quality of the light right, the way it wasn't quite gold and wasn't quite orange but some living color in between, restless, warm, endlessly multiplying.
Nothing you had ever painted came close.
now i'm here, blinking in the starlight
now i'm here, suddenly i see
standing here
The lanterns rose in waves, not all at once but in long, cascading pulsesβa hundred, then another hundred, then more than you could count, drifting up from courtyards and rooftops and the decks of boats all across the harbor, joining together into a slow, vast river of light climbing the dark sky. The water around your little boat filled with their reflections until it was impossible to say, looking down, where the true lanterns ended and the false ones beganβgold above you, gold below you, and you sitting in the very middle of it with your breath caught somewhere behind your ribs.
"Oh," you said, which was not remotely adequate to the size of what you were feeling, but was all you had.
"Yeah," Martin said, softly, and when you looked over at him he wasn't watching the lanterns at all. He was watching you, your face lit gold and trembling with reflected light, your eyes wide and wet in a way you hadn't quite noticed until you felt the first tear slip free and had to laugh, embarrassed, wiping at it with the back of your wrist.
"I've waited my whole life for this."
"I know."
"I didn't even know what I was waiting for. I just knew that every year, this light showed up in the sky, and something in me hurt, every time, and I never understood why, and now I'm sitting here and I still don't fully understand why except that it feels likeβ" you struggled for it again, the same struggle as the overlook, except this time you didn't let yourself give up on finding the words.
and the world has somehow shifted.
"It feels like they were waiting for someone. And some enormous, stupid, hopeful part of me has always believed, without any evidence at all, that the someone was me."
Martin was quiet for a long moment, and when you glanced at him his expression had gone soft and unguarded in a way you'd only caught glimpses of beforeβat the campfire, at the mouth of the tunnel, never allowed to sit still on his face long enough for you to really look at it.
"For what it's worth," he said, "I think it probably was."
all at once, everything looks different... now that i see you.
Reaching into his satchel, he drew out two lanternsβsmall, folded flat, clearly purchased at some point during the walk down from the overlook, though you hadn't noticed him buying them, too absorbed in the viewβand passed one across to you, along with a little punk of glowing incense to light the wick.
"I got us our own," he said, almost shy about it, which did not suit him at all and which you found, helplessly, endearing anyway. "Figured you shouldn't have to just watch other people's."
Your hands weren't quite steady as you unfolded the paper frame and touched the flame to the wick, the lantern blooming gold between your palms, warm and alive, straining gently upward the way they all did, wanting badly to join the great river of light rising above you.
"Make a wish," Martin said. "Isn't that the tradition? Birthday girl gets a wish."
You looked at him, sharp. "I never told you it was my birthday."
He had the grace, at least, to look faintly caught out. "You didn't have to. Lost princess, mysterious lantern obsession, refuses to give her real name, gets misty over a light show that happens on one specific night of the yearβI put it together somewhere around the singing-bowl incident, honestly."
"You've known this whole time."
"I've suspected this whole time. There's a difference. I was being polite about it."
"You've been calling me gongju for two days as a joke."
"I've been calling you gongju for two days because I was fairly confident, and also because it made you make that specific face you're making right now, which I happen to enjoy a great deal." He nodded down at the lantern cupped in your hands, steering neatly away from the moment before you could examine it too closely. "Make your wish, princess. Before it burns your fingers."
You held the lantern a moment longer, warm light spilling up between your hands onto your face, and thoughtβnot about the kingdom below, not even about the parents you didn't yet know you had, waiting somewhere in that dark palace with a hope they'd never once let themselves fully abandon. But about the man sitting across from you in a stolen boat, teeth genuinely, infuriatingly perfect, watching you like you were the only light on the entire water worth looking at.
You didn't say the wish out loud. But you let it go anyway, watched it rise and catch the current of wind that carried it up to join the thousands of others, and when you looked back down, Martin was still watching you, close enough now that you could count, if you'd wanted to, every one of his eyelashes.
"Your turn," you said, a little breathless.
He lit his own lantern, let it rise, and didn't look away from you while he did itβno smolder this time, none of the careful, practiced charm from the campfire that had made you laugh at him. Just him, looking at you, plain and raw and slightly disbelieving of his own luck Like a man who'd broken into a random tower to hide from two very angry brothers and found, instead of an empty room, the entire rest of his life.
"I'm not going to tell you what I wished for," he said, "but I will say it involves considerably less running from armed men than my last several wishes."
"That's a low bar."
"I'm a man of variety."
You laughedβyou couldn't help it, the sound coming out watery and warmβand somewhere in the laugh, without either of you quite deciding to, the space between you closed, his hand finding yours again in the bottom of the boat, and you found yourself leaning in, slow, the way the whole evening had been slow and inevitable since the moment he tumbled through your window, and he leaned in too, and for one full suspended second, gold light drifting down all around you like something out of a legend, you thoughtβthis. This is the thing I've been aching for every single year I watched it from too far away.
Kono chose that exact moment to launch himself, with great personal indignation, off your shoulder and directly onto the bridge of Martin's nose.
"Owβ" Martin reeled back, more startled than hurt, batting uselessly at the small dragon now clinging to his face with all four clawed feet and radiating profound betrayal. "Your dragon justβhe attacked me, did you see that, he full-onβ"
"He's protective," you said, laughing so hard you had to hold the sides of the boat to keep from tipping, tears mixing with the ones already on your face, watching Kono glare down at Martin from the very tip of his nose like a small, furious guardian spirit who had absolutely no intention of allowing anything interesting to happen without express supervision.
"He is feral, is what he isβ"
"He likes you," you said, wiping your eyes, still laughing. "This is how he shows it. Trust me. If he actually hated you, you'd know."
"This does not feel like liking, this feels like an assassination attemptβ"
Kono flicked his tail, unbothered, and settled himself with great satisfaction directly between the two of you on the boat's narrow bench, clearly intending to remain there for the foreseeable future, a small, smug, iridescent chaperone against a sky still falling gold, lantern light rippling gently across the water in every direction, thousands of tiny floating wishes drifting home at last to a girl who'd spent eighteen years wondering, in the quiet dark of a tower window, whether anyone out there was waiting for her.
They had been. All along. And now, impossibly, so was he.
You looked at Martin over the top of Kono's indignant, iridescent head, both of you still laughing, both of you still close enough to feel the warmth radiating off each other in the cooling night air, and you thought that whatever happened next. Whatever the palace held, whatever answers waited for you at the bottom of that harbor, whatever Mother would do when she finally caught up to you, because you had no illusions that she wouldn'tβthis part, right here, the boat and the gold light and the ridiculous, wounded dragon and the ridiculous, wonderful man across from you, was a part you were never, ever going to forget.
"Happy birthday, gongju," Martin said, quiet, over the top of a still-hissing Kono, and you thought, looking at him, that for the first time in your entire life, you actually believed it.
Laterβmuch later, after the last of the lanterns had burned low and drifted, spent, back down toward the water, after Woojoo had forgiven you both just enough to let Martin scratch behind his ears without incident, after Kono had finally abandoned his post between you to curl up, smug and victorious, in the fold of your sleeveβyou rowed the little boat back toward shore in a silence that wasn't empty at all. It was full instead of everything neither of you had quite said yet, the two of you sitting close enough that your knees kept knocking together with every small motion of the water.
You didn't know yet what waited for you at the top of that hillβwhat the palace would say when a girl with hair like sunlight walked through its gates for the first time in eighteen years, what Mother would do when she finally caught up to the two of you, what it would cost, in the end, to keep any of this. You only knew that you didn't want the night to be over, that some small, stubborn, hopeful part of you had already decided, somewhere between the singing bowl and the lantern light, that whatever came next, you wanted to face it with your hand in his.
"What happens now?" you asked, quiet, as the shore came slowly closer, torchlight from the docks beginning to flicker gold across the water to meet you.
Martin was quiet for a moment, considering the question with more weight than his usual answers ever carried.
"I don't know," he admitted, finally. "I've never actually planned past the running-away part before. Usually there isn't a now. There's just the next place to be, and the next, and I never stick around long enough to find out what comes after."
"And this time?"
He looked at you, truly and deeply gazed. It was the way he had at the overlook, at the tunnel's mouth, at every unguarded moment he'd let slip through the cracks of his own careful charm over the past four daysβand something in his face settled, like a decision he'd already made without quite admitting it to himself.
"This time," he hummed, "I think I'd like to find out."
The boat bumped gently against the dock, and somewhere above you, one last, late lantern rose alone into the dark, gold and small and stubborn, chasing after all the others that had gone before itβand you thought, watching it go, that it looked exactly like hope.
Morning came in gray and soft, mist lying low over the harbor the way it did most mornings this close to the water, and you woke tucked against the base of a fishing boat with Kono curled warm against your throat and Martin already awake beside you, satchel across his shoulder, watching the fog with an expression you didn't much care for.
"You're making a weird face," you said, sitting up, voice still thick with sleep. "This like... stiff, deciding-something face."
"I don't have a stiff, deciding-something face."
"You absolutely do. You had it right before you climbed through my window and you have it right now."
He exhaled, and some of the careful blankness dropped away, replaced by something more honestβnervous, almost, in a way that didn't suit him nearly as well as the sarcasm usually did. "I want to do this properly. Whatever this is turning into." He nodded down at the satchel, at the unmistakable shape of the crown inside it. "I know people who'll take this off my hands for real money, enough that neither of us has to run from anything ever again. I want to trade it, clean, and come back for you, and thenβI don't know. Figure out the rest. Together, if you'll have me."
"You could just give it back."
"I could," he agreed, "and normally I'd have laughed you out of the harbor for suggesting it. But I'm finding, lately, that a lot of things that used to make sense don't anymore, and a lot of things I never used to consider are starting to sound like exactly what I want." He reached out, tucked a loose strand of hair back from your face, unbearably gentle about it. "Wait for me here. I won't be long."
"You'd better not be."
"Princess." He said it soft, like a promise rather than a joke, and pressed one quick, warm kiss to your forehead before you could think of anything clever enough to say back. "I'll be back before the fog burns off. I swear it."
You watched him go, satchel bouncing against his hip, Woojoo trailing reluctantly after him with the particular resigned loyalty of a creature who'd decided, against every instinct, to trust his rider one more timeβand you sat there on the damp dock with Kono in your lap, watching the mist swallow him up, and told yourself, firmly, that the ache in your chest was nothing. Just morning cold. Just nerves. Nothing at all like fear.
The fog thickened instead of burning off, and the longer you waited the worse the ache in your chest got, until you couldn't sit still any longer and started pacing the dock's edge, Kono clinging tight to your shoulder, both of you straining to hear anything at all beyond the slow slap of water against the pilings.
You heard voices first. They were low and harsh, more than one man, coming from somewhere off along the tree line past the last of the boatsβand against every ounce of good sense you had left, you went toward them instead of away.
You found the clearing just past the fog's thickest bank, and what you found there stopped your heart cold: Martin on his knees in the mud, satchel gone, two enormous men standing over himβone you'd recognize instantly from the way Martin had gone rigid at the mere mention of them days ago, though you'd never learned their names until this moment.
Sunghoon. Jay. Buff, scarred, furious, and entirely unbothered by the fact that Martin was bleeding from a split lip and still trying, uselessly, to talk his way out.
"You cut us out," Sunghoon was saying, low and dangerous. "Two years of work, and you cut us out for a girl."
"It wasn't like thatβ"
"Save it." Jay's boot connected with Martin's ribs, and you had to bite down hard on your own hand to keep from crying out. "We'll take the crown. And we'll take the reward for you too. Two birds."
And then, from somewhere behind them, a voice you knew better than your own heartbeat, cool and pleasant and utterly without mercy.
"Gentlemen," Mother said, stepping out of the mist like she'd been waiting there all along, "I believe I can make this considerably more profitable for everyone involved."
You didn't understand, in the moment, what you were watchingβonly that Mother produced a small purse of coin, that Sunghoon and Jay's fury seemed to shift, calculating, weighing a better offer, that Martin's face went from pained to something close to horrified the second he understood what was happening.
"Don't," he said, to Mother, voice raw. "Whatever you're planningβleave her out of it. She doesn't have to be part of this."
"She has always been part of this," Mother said, almost gently, crouching down to his level with the particular tenderness she'd once reserved, you realized with a sick lurch, entirely for you. "You simply made the mistake of thinking you'd earned a say in it."
You didn't see exactly what happened nextβa scuffle, Martin shouting your name once, sharp and desperate, before something struck him and the sound cut offβbecause Mother had already turned, unerringly, toward the tree line where you stood frozen, and her eyes found yours through the fog with a precision that told you she'd known exactly where you were the entire time.
"There you are," she said, soft, and something about the softness was so much worse than the fury from the hanok. "Come along, darling. I think it's well past time we had a talk."
You ran. You didn't get far.
By the time the fog burned off, you were sitting in the belly of a small, windowless room that smelled of salt and old ropeβnot the tower, you understood dimly, some hidden place along the coast Mother had clearly kept in reserve for exactly this kind of contingencyβwrists bound loosely, more out of formality than real restraint, because Mother had never needed rope to keep you where she wanted you. She'd only ever needed your own heart, turned carefully against itself.
"He left, you know," she said, arranging herself on the room's single stool with the composure of a woman discussing the weather. "The moment those men offered him a way out, he took it. The crown. The reward money for turning you in besides, I'd imagineβa tidy sum for very little effort." She sighed, and it might almost have sounded sympathetic, if you hadn't spent eighteen years learning exactly how much genuine feeling lived underneath that particular sigh. "I saw the ship myself. Sailing out with the morning tide. I'm so sorry, darling. I did try to warn you what the world was like."
"You're lying."
"Am I?" She tilted her head, and something flickered behind her eyesβnot doubt, never doubt, but the faint, familiar satisfaction of a woman watching a plan click neatly into place. "You've known him four days. I've kept you safe for eighteen years. Which of us, do you truly think, has earned your trust?"
You wanted, badly, to believe it was a lieβevery instinct in your chest screamed that it wasβand yet some old, deep, tower-shaped part of you, the part that had spent a lifetime being told the world was cruel and that Mother alone could be counted on, curled up small and aching and terribly, terribly willing to believe her anyway. That was the cruelest part of it. Not the lie itself, but how easily, after everything, it still found purchase.
"I want to go home," Mother said, standing, brushing invisible dust from her skirts. "Not the towerβsomewhere new, somewhere he'll never think to look, somewhere I can keep you properly this time. You'll thank me for it, eventually. You always do."
You didn't answer. You sat very still in the dim, salt-smelling dark, and thought about a boat full of lantern light, and a man who'd bought you a fan for no reason at all, and a dragon who'd bitten his nose out of pure, ridiculous devotionβand something in you, quiet but absolutely unshakeable, refused, even now, even with the doubt gnawing at your ribs, to fully believe the story Mother was selling.
Martin woke in a cell.
His head throbbed, his ribs ached with every breath, and it took him several long, disoriented minutes to piece together that the last thing he rememberedβMother's voice, your name torn out of his throat, the world going darkβhad apparently ended with him here, iron bars, straw floor, and a guard outside who addressed him, with unmistakable relish, by the exact reward figure printed on his wanted poster.
"They're saying you kidnapped a girl," the guard said, almost cheerful about it. "Some noble's daughter. Word is the hanging's set for sundown. Shame about the teeth, by the wayβheard the sketch was more flattering than the real thing."
"I did not kidnap anyone," Martin gritted, with the flat, exhausted fury of a man repeating himself for the fifth time, "and my teeth are fineβ" and then stopped, because none of that mattered even slightly next to the one thought currently eclipsing everything else in his skull: she thinks I left her.
He didn't remember much of what happened after thatβonly that somewhere past midnight, a small, furious, iridescent shape came skittering through the cell's single high window, having tracked him across half the coastline on nothing but sheer stubborn will. Not long after, the cell door groaned open from the outside to reveal Namjoon's enormous, grinning face, flanked by the twins, the man with the weasel, and, filling the corridor behind them with visible, righteous indignation, one extremely large, extremely unimpressed horse.
"Heard you got yourself in trouble," Namjoon said. "Figured we'd come see if the rumors about your teeth were the only thing worth breaking you out for."
"I could kiss every single one of you," Martin said, already moving.
"Please don't," said one of the twins, Juhoon. "We heard about the fisherman's wife."
He found you by the coast road at dusk, Mother's carriage rattling ahead through the last of the fading light, and there was no time for a plan, no time for anything except Woojoo breaking into a dead run with Martin bent low over his neck and Kono clinging, white-knuckled, to his collar, the whole ragged, impossible rescue party thundering after a carriage carrying away the only thing that had ever made the running feel like it was going somewhere.
He caught them at the cliff road, where the trees gave way to open sky and the sea spread out gray and endless below, and Mother, seeing him, didn't so much as flinch.
"Persistent," she said, stepping down from the carriage alone, something cold and final settling into her face. "I did wonder if you'd manage it."
"Let her go."
"She's not yours to demand things about." Mother's eyes flicked past him, to where you'd appeared in the carriage doorway. His wrists finally free, staring at Martin like you couldn't quite trust the sight of himβbruised, breathless, undeniably, impossibly there. "Tell him, darling. Tell him what you told me. That you understand now. That the world outside only ever takes."
"I told you I didn't believe you," you said, voice shaking but clear, stepping down onto the road. "I still don't."
Something in Mother's composure cracked, just slightly, just enough. "You would choose him. After everything I've given you. Everything I've sacrificed."
"You didn't give me anything," you said, and the words came out steadier than you felt, eighteen years of swallowed truth finally finding air. "You took me. There's a difference. I've only just learned it, but I've learned it completely."
What happened next happened fast, and badly, the way real danger always doesβMother lunging, a blade you hadn't seen catching the last of the light, Martin throwing himself between the two of you with no more thought than he'd given anything else reckless and right over the past four days, and then the sharp, terrible sound of metal finding flesh, and Martin going down hard onto the cliff road with blood already spreading dark across his side.
"Martinβ"
"I'm fine," he said, which was so obviously, catastrophically untrue that you didn't even bother arguing, dropping to your knees beside him, hands already pressing hard against the wound, some old instinct screaming at you to sing, sing the old words, the ones Mother used every time she needed the magic, and you opened your mouth to do exactly thatβ
"Don't," Martin said, gripping your wrist with what strength he had left, eyes finding yours through the pain with a clarity that cut straight through everything else. "If you do thatβif you use it nowβshe'll never let either of us go. Not really. Not ever. She'll just keep finding a reason to need you broken enough to fix."
"I can't just let youβ"
"You can," he said, "trust me, princess, pleaseβ" and reached, with the last of his strength, for the small blade at his own belt, the one he'd used to fillet fish and cut rope and once, memorably, threaten a very rude tax collector, and before you fully understood what he meant to do, he'd taken hold of your long braid and cut, clean through, several feet of gold-shot hair falling away into the dirt at once, severed for good.
The change was immediate and terrible. The cut length dulled from gold to something ordinary and plain even as it fell, and Motherβmid-motion, reaching for you, for the hair, for the magic she'd spent a hundred years stealingβmade a sound you would never, for the rest of your life, be able to fully forget.
Her hands went first, skin creasing and thinning before your eyes, decades collapsing into her all at once, unstoppable now that the last thread keeping her young had been severed for good.
She staggered back toward the cliff's edge, aged a hundred years in the space of ten seconds, and the wind off the sea did the rest, catching what was left of her and scattering it, gray and weightless, out over the water until there was nothing left standing on the road at all.
You didn't watch it finish. You were already turned back to Martin, hands shaking, pressing uselessly against a wound that wasn't healing, that had no reason left to heal, because the magic that could have done it lay scattered in cut hair and ash somewhere behind you.
"Hey," Martin said, voice going thin, "heyβdon't do that face, the face you're doingβ"
"Don't you dare," you said, furious and breaking all at once. "Don't you dare talk to me about faces right nowβ"
"I'd do it again," he said, eyes already starting to lose their focus, "every time, exactly the same, I just want you to know that, in case I don't get toβ"
"You're not finishing that sentence."
He smiled anyway, small and lopsided, teeth perfectly, infuriatingly straight even now, and his eyes slid shut.
You didn't remember deciding to cry. You only remembered the tears coming, hot and helpless, one falling from your cheek straight onto the wound at his sideβand the low, golden hum that followed, faint but unmistakable, the last living echo of magic that had never fully left you even with the hair gone, because it had never really lived in the hair at all. It had always been in you.
The wound closed. Color came back into his face all at once, like a held breath finally released, and his eyes opened, blinking up at you in dazed, disbelieving confusion.
"You're supposed to be dead," you told him, half laughing, half sobbing, hands still shaking as you cradled his face.
"Rude," he said, voice cracked but unmistakably, wonderfully himself, "extremely rude, waking a man up just to insult himβ"
You didn't let him finish that sentence.
You kissed him before you'd fully decided to, both hands still fisted in the collar of his shirt where you'd been holding him together only seconds before, and it wasn't gentle β you didn't have gentle left in you, not after watching the color drain out of his face, not after the terrible, endless second where you'd genuinely believed you were about to lose him on a cliff road with the sea crashing below and no way left to fix it. It was too much all at once, everything you hadn't let yourself say out loud over four impossible days crashing out through your mouth against his instead β the fear, still shaking through your hands where they'd found his jaw; the relief, hot and overwhelming, closing your throat; the something else underneath both of those that you'd been carefully not naming since the moment he tumbled through your window and hadn't stopped, apparently, not even once, not even now.
Martin made a low, startled sound against your mouth β surprise, mostly, and then something that wasn't surprise at all β and his hand came up to cradle the back of your head, careful even now, even freshly healed and half out of his mind with everything that had just happened, fingers threading into what was left of your hair like he needed the proof of it, needed to know you were real and warm and still here under his hands. You felt him breathe out, shaky, against you, felt the last of the tension bleed out of his shoulders the way it never quite had, not fully, not once in the entire time you'd known him.
"You scared me," you said, when you finally, barely, pulled back far enough to speak, forehead pressed to his, both of you still breathing like you'd run the whole cliff road twice over. "YouΒ scaredΒ me, don't you dare ever do that againβ"
"No promises," he murmured, and you could feel him smiling against your mouth, that same infuriating, undimmed confidence creeping back in even now, even bloodied, even seconds from death and back again. "Apparently I throw myself in front of knives for you now. New personality trait. Very inconvenient."
"Martin."
"I mean it, though." His thumb traced along your jaw, slow, and when you met his eyes there was nothing left of the joke in them at all, just something steady and stripped bare, more honest than anything he'd let you see across four days of careful, practiced charm. "I'd do it again. Every single time, exactly the same, no hesitation, and I need you to actually hear that, not just β not just as something I say to be dramatic on a cliff. I mean it."
"I heard you the first time. Right before you nearly died proving it."
"Poor timing, historically my specialty," he agreed, and kissed you again before you could argue, slower this time, both of you steadier now, no longer shaking quite so hard, just close and warm and unwilling, for a long moment, to be anything but exactly where you wereβhis hand still tangled in your hair, yours still fisted in his ruined, blood-stained shirt, the whole world narrowed down to the small distance between your mouths and the specific, dizzying fact that he was alive to kiss you back.
Somewhere nearby, Kono shrieked with pure, unrestrained delight, launching himself in a small iridescent blur to land on Martin's shoulder and chirp something that sounded, for the first time in their entire acquaintance, like approval rather than threat.
Woojoo, standing a few respectful paces off, huffed out a long breath through his nose and, for once in his entire life, looked almost pleased about something Martin had doneβears forward, head tossed once as if in reluctant, grudging blessing, the closest thing to a truce he'd ever offered.
You laughed, breathless and wet-eyed, breaking the kiss just far enough to rest your forehead against his again. "Even Kono's happy. Do you understand how significant that is? He's never once been happy about you."
"I earned it," Martin said, hoarse, still smiling like he couldn't quite stop. "Nearly dying for you apparently buys a man some goodwill, even from a judgmental little dragon who's hated me since the moment I fell through a window."
"Don't get used to it."
"Too late," he said, and pulled you back in before you could answer, no urgency left in it now, just something slow and certain and entirely unhurried, the two of you kissing on a cliff road at dawn like you had all the time in the world left to spend exactly like this.
The palace gates opened at dawn to a girl with short, plain, ordinary hair and a face the king recognized, the moment he saw it. With a certainty that needed no proof at allβsome things a parent simply knows, in the body, before the mind has caught up to explaining why.
The queen reached you first, running down the palace steps in a way queens were certainly not supposed to run, and you didn't need eighteen years of stolen memory to understand, the instant her arms closed around you, exactly what you'd been missing every single night you'd watched those lanterns from too far away.
There was a great deal to explain, afterβa kingdom's worth of grief to untangle. A name to relearn that had been yours all along, a wanted man's record to quietly, thoroughly clear, which the king accomplished within the hour with the particular efficiency of a father who had just gotten his daughter back and had no patience left for bureaucratic nonsense.
Martin stood through most of it looking deeply, uncharacteristically nervous, hands shoved in his pockets, until the king finally turned to him and said, simply, "You brought her home," and something in Martin's whole posture eased for what looked like the first time in his entire life.
Kono took up permanent residence on the windowsill of your new rooms, deeply unimpressed by the palace's excessive number of servants and considerably more impressed by the quality of the kitchen scraps. Woojoo was given, over Martin's strenuous objections, an official post as a royal guard's mount, a position he apparently found so satisfying that his campaign of vengeful boot-stepping slowed, within a few months, to something almost like fondness.
Namjoon and the rest of the hanok's strange, loyal patrons were invited, formally, to the palace for the next year's lantern festival, and caused, by every account, an enormous and thoroughly enjoyable scandal.
And every year after that, on the anniversary of the night a stranger fell through a tower window and a girl hit him with a singing bowl, the two of you took a small boat out onto the harbor when the lanterns rose. They were gold and endless, filling the sky the way they always hadβexcept now, for the first time in either of your lives, you watched them from exactly where you were always meant to be.
"Happy anniversary, my gongju," Martin said, every single year, and every single year, you believed him a little more.
if she's here
it's crystal clear
i'm where i'm meant to go
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pairing. flynn rider ! martin / f ! rapunzel reader
warnings + info. oneshot, fantasy au, tangled retelling, strangers to lovers, not exactly parallel to the movie so don't be confused if some things are different, kissing, violence, imagine messyhaired!tin ok?, features many people you know and love ;)
synopsis. a handsome thief hiding from his crimes picks the wrong tower to climb into, and the girl locked inside it has been waiting her whole life for an excuse to leave.
wc. 18.3k
maddy's note. i marinated on this idea for ages and finally it has come to fruition so i cannot wait for u guys to read it π! ik my martin girls are heavily deprived so this ones for u guys hehehe but especially for meri @griinspire and pearl @marsgirltyshi and lili @chocom0ka (and seulbi but she's Gone off blr) because no one does martins gf like they do ππ!!!
there is no playlist for this because, well, it has a soundtrack of its own and quite frankly i'm a little lazy to compile songs rn............. #iseethelighttruther
tagging 90% of Core15 bc they yell at me @kaikaikoi @hyuneskkami @hollyoongs @aerinettes
Once upon a time, in a kingdom nestled between green mountains and a sea the color of jade, there was born a princess.
Of course, like any other fairytale, she was not born ordinary. On the night before her birth, a single drop of moonlight was said to have fallen from the sky and rooted itself into the earth, blooming into a flower that glowed gold from root to petal. The palace healers, desperate to save the queen who lay dying in childbed, ground the flower into a tea and poured it past her lips, and by morning the queen lived, and by evening the princess was born with a single lock of hair that shone like sunlight caught in silk.
The kingdom rang bells for three days. The king wept. The people lit lanterns and floated them on the river in thanks to whatever gods had seen fit to spare their queen and gift them a princess who glowed.
But the flower's magic had not vanished when it was boiled into tea. It had simply movedβinto the girl. Into her hair, which did not merely shine but healed, which did not merely glow but sang low and golden when the right words were spoken over it, undoing wounds, softening age, drawing sickness out of the body like poison from a wound.
There was a woman in the kingdomβnever young, never quite old, a woman the years seemed to slide off of like water off stoneβwho had known about the flower long before the healers ever found it. She had kept it hidden for a hundred years, using its magic to keep herself exactly as she wished to remain. When it was taken from her and given to a queen and consumed by a birth she had no part of, something in her curdled.
She was called, by then, only Mother.
She came for the princess on a night when the moon was new and the palace slept heavy with relief. She did not take the flower. She took the girl instead, because the girl was the flower now, and she carried her from the palace in the dark and up into the mountains, to a tower with no door, only a single window round as an eye, hidden behind a curtain of waterfall and stone.
She raised the princess as her own. She told her that the world outside was full of people who would tear her apart for the power in her hair, that the tower was the only place she would ever be safe, that Mother's loveβsharp-edged and conditional and always, always followed by but you know I only want what's best for youβwas the only love the girl would ever need.
The king and queen sent lanterns into the sky every year on their daughter's birthday, thousands of them, gold as the flower that had saved the queen's life, in the small and stubborn hope that somewhere, somehow, their daughter would see them and know she was being waited for.
The girl in the tower saw them. Every year, from her window, she watched the far-off sky fill with floating light and never once knew they were for her.
She only knew that something in her chest ached every time the horizon lit up gold, and she never could explain why.
The king and queen never stopped hoping. Every year, when the lanterns had all burned low and drifted back down to the water, the queen would stand alone at the highest window of the palace a while longer than anyone else, watching the dark where the last of the light had gone, and the king would come find her there, and neither of them would say anything at all, because there was nothing left to say that eighteen years of the same silent vigil hadn't already said a hundred times over. They kept her room exactly as it had been. They never once let themselves call it a memorial, because a memorial was for something that was over, and they had never once let themselves believe it was over.
The kingdom, for its part, grew used to the grief the way kingdoms doβfolding it quietly into tradition, into the yearly ritual of light, into a story told to children at bedtime about a princess who might, one day, come home. Most had stopped truly expecting it. The lanterns kept rising anyway. Hope, it turned out, didn't require belief to keep going. It only required someone willing to light the wick one more time.
You had lived eighteen years in that tower, and in that time you had become, out of sheer boredom and stubbornness, extremely accomplished.
You could grind ink and paint mountains that looked like the ones you'd never climbed. You could play the gayageum until your fingers bled and then keep playing anyway. You'd taught yourself to read faster than Mother liked, to argue better than Mother liked, to want more than Mother liked, though you were careful never to let her see the wanting directly. You kept it folded small, tucked behind your ribs, brought out only at night with the shutters closed, when you traced the shapes of mountains you'd painted from imagination and wondered what they smelled like up close.
Kono did not approve of the wanting.
Kono was small, no longer than your forearm, built more like a lizard than the great serpentine dragons painted on temple ceilings, but for the two soft antler-like horns that curled back from his brow and the faint iridescent sheen to his scales that shifted blue to green to gold depending on how the light caught himβthe exact shifting, you'd always thought, of oil on water, or of a fish turning in a stream. He had a long tail he liked to wrap possessively around your wrist, small clawed feet that could grip silk without snagging it, and an expression, for a creature with no eyebrows, of near-constant and deeply personal disappointment in you.Β
He had been left on your windowsill as a hatchling the summer you turned nine, small and starving and furious about it, and had simply never left, and you had never really asked why a mountain temple's guardian creature had abandoned his post to live with a girl in a tower, and he had never told you.
He was, as far as you'd ever heard, meant to bring luck. You mostly found this funny.
"I'm just saying," you told him, that particular evening, standing at the window with your chin in your hands, watching the light change over the tree line, "that if I have to hear one more story about how the outside world is full of ruffians and cutthroats waiting specifically for me, I might actually go looking for the ruffians and cutthroats just to see if they're more interesting than staying here."
Kono made a small, unimpressed noise and flicked his tail against your neck.
"You're right, you're right. Bad plan." You sighed, and the sigh fogged faintly against the cool evening air. "But it's my birthday in three days, Kono. Eighteen years old, and I've never once stood in actual dirt. Do you know how insane that is?"
He blinked his round eyes at you, which you had long since learned to interpret as yes, obviously, I have been here the entire time, why are you telling me this like it's news.
You didn't get to finish making your case, because that was the exact moment something enormous and irritable and coated in mud came flying over the tree line, followed at some distance by two men on horseback who were shouting in a way that suggested this was not a friendly race.
You watched, chin still in your hands, as the fleeing shapeβa horse, you realized, a truly furious-looking horse with no riderβthundered off in one direction, and the men gave up the chase and doubled back toward the waterfall instead, toward the tower, toward the one place in this entire kingdom that was not supposed to be findable.
Kono went rigid against your shoulder.
You, if you were being fully honest with yourself, felt something in your chest that was not quite fear. It sat right alongside the fear, close enough to be mistaken for it, but it wasn't fear.
It was closer to finally.
His name, you would learnβthough not for several more extremely tense minutesβwas Martin Edwards, and he arrived through your window the way a cat arrives through a window: badly, loudly, and with absolutely no acknowledgment that he might be intruding.
He tumbled onto your floor in a graceless heap of limbs, dragging a satchel that clinked with something metal, and had approximately one and a half seconds to register that the tower he'd chosen at complete random to hide in was, in fact, occupied, before you brought the singing bowl down over his head with every ounce of strength eighteen years of restless boredom had built into your arms.
The bowl rang out, low and resonant, an actual musical note hanging in the air over the sound of him crumpling sideways into your dried-flower arrangement.
You stood over him, bowl still raised, breathing hard, and felt, for the first time in your entire life, genuinely and thoroughly alive.
He groaned. He was, you noted with some irritation, extremely tall even lying down, all long limbs folded wrong across your floor, and even unconscious his face had the specific, punchable quality of someone who had never once in his life doubted that he was the most charming person in any room he walked into.
Kono skittered down your arm to the floor and approached the stranger with the deep suspicion of a creature sizing up a rival. He sniffed once at Martin's outstretched hand, apparently found it lacking, and turned his back on it with as much dignity as a small dragon draped in mud-splattered iridescent scales could manage.
You dragged the intruderβwith considerable effort, and a truly staggering amount of complaining directed at Kono, who offered zero helpβinto your wardrobe, and shut the door, and sat down hard on your bed with your heart going like a struck drum.
Ruffians and cutthroats, you thought, a little hysterically. Right on schedule.
He woke up loud, which you supposed made sense, given everything else about him so far.
"βokay, okay, I'm awake, I'm awake, get theβ" He kicked the wardrobe door open with a force that sent your good winter coats sliding off their hooks and staggered out into the room with both hands raised, blinking against the lamplight, and then his eyes landed on you, standing across the room with the singing bowl held out in front of you like a shield, and something in his face actually, genuinely, lit up.
"Oh," he hummed. "Hello."
"Don't move," you said.
"I'm not moving." He did not stop moving. His eyes were doing a slow, assessing sweep of the roomβthe window, the wardrobe, you, the bowl, back to youβthat you didn't love the feeling of. "Nice place. Veryβcozy. Homey. Round. You don't get a lot of round rooms."
"I said don't move."
"I'm being extremely still." He took a single, deliberate step sideways, testing you, and you swung the bowl an inch closer to his skull, and he froze with both hands up again, and something that might have been the beginning of respect crossed his face. "Okay. Fair. Noted."
Up close, in better light, he was infuriatingly good-looking in a way you resented on principle. Tallβtaller than anyone had a right to be in a low-ceilinged tower room. This ruffian was blond in a country where you'd never once seen hair that color (not that youβd really seen any other existing humans).
He had this odd and loose, careless confidence that suggested he'd never had to work particularly hard for anything, including, apparently, avoiding capture, since two very large men had chased him halfway across a mountain and he still looked more amused than afraid.
"Who are you," you snarled, "and how did you find this tower?"
"Martin Edwards." He said it like it should mean something to you. When your expression didn't change, an emotion flickered across his faceβannoyance, maybe, or the specific wound of a man whose name usually did land. "You've truly never heard of me."
"I've never heard of anyone. I live in a tower."
"Right. Yes. Fair point, very fair, I did notice theβtower situation." He gestured vaguely at the room, the window, the general concept of your entire life. "Look, I didn't find this place, I was being chased, I saw a hole in a wall of rock, I went through the hole. This was not a planned visit. I have no interest in yourβtower. Your life. Any of it. I just need to lay low for a bit and then I will be very happy to climb right back out that window and never think about any of this again."
You considered him. You considered the satchel, which he'd dropped by the wardrobe door, and which had made a very specific metallic clinking sound when he fell.
"What's in the bag?"
His whole body changedβjust slightly, just for a second, a flicker of genuine alarm before the easy charm slid back over it like a curtain. "Nothing that concerns you."
"It's in my room."
"It's in my possession."
"You're in my tower."
"Okay, fine, guess thatβsβactually a decent point." He exhaled through his nose, glanced at the window, seemed to calculate something, and then said, with the air of a man laying down a very reasonable trump card: "Tell you what. You let me leave, quietly, no fuss, and I forget this entire evening ever happened. Bag included. Everyone wins."
You should have said yes. Laterβmuch later, with the wind in your hair and your heart still going too fast in your chestβyou would think about how easy it would have been to say yes, to open the window, to let him climb back out into the night and never know what you'd almost missed.
Instead you looked past him, out your one round window, at the darkening sky, and you thought about lanterns you'd never seen up close and mountains you'd only ever painted from guesswork, and you heard yourself say, "No."
He blinked. "No?"
"You're going to take me somewhere."
"I am not."
"There's a light show. Lanterns. Every year, on theβ" you almost said my birthday, and swallowed it, some old instinct telling you not to hand a stranger that particular thread to pull. "There's a light in the sky, every year, from the direction of the kingdom. I want to see it up close. You're going to take me, and then you can have your littleβ¦ bag back."
"You don't have my bag."
"I know where you left it," you said, which was true, and gestured with your chin at Kono, who had, in the general chaos, quietly and with great personal satisfaction dragged the satchel across the floor and was now sitting on top of it with the smug posture of a creature who understood exactly what leverage was.
Martin looked at the dragon. The dragon looked at Martin. Something passed between them that you didn't fully understand yet but would come, over the following days, to recognize as the opening shot of a genuinely long and deeply petty war.
"That thing is sitting on my satchel," Martin gasped, in the tone of a man who could not quite believe the indignity of his current situation.
"His name is Kono."
"I don't care what his name is, he is sitting on myβ"
"He's very protective," you said, not entirely truthfully, since Kono's motives had far more to do with spite than protection, but you weren't about to admit that. "So. Lanterns. Then your bag. Then you go wherever it is men with bags full of clinking things go."
Martin looked at you for a long moment. He truly looked, in a way that made you resist the urge to fold your arms over your chest, and then rubbed both hands down his face and groaned like a man who'd already lost an argument he hadn't realized he was having.
"You," he chuckled in what you assume to be sarcasm, "are going to be a problem."
"Probably," you agreed, and found, to your own surprise, that you were smiling.
"For the record," he added, already turning to inspect the window, testing the give of the shutter with one hand, "I don't actually do this. Escort duty. Tour guide. Whatever this is."
"You don't have much choice."
"I have plenty of choice, lady. I'm choosing to be gracious about a bad situation, there's a difference." He glanced back at you, something assessing in the look, like he was recalculating you from scratch now that the singing bowl had been lowered. "How far is this light show, anyway?"
"I don't actually know."
"You don'tβ" He closed his eyes briefly, the particular patience of a man doing math he didn't want to do. "You dragged me into a hostage negotiation for a destination you don't know the distance to."
"It's in the direction of the kingdom. I've watched it every year from the window. It can't be that far."
"'Can't be that far' has gotten men killed, you know."
"You'll live," you said, with far more confidence than you actually possessed, and went to go retrieve your good travelling shoes, leaving him standing by the window looking like a man reconsidering every choice that had led him to this particular evening.
You changed, too, while he waitedβout of the loose sleeping robes you'd been in when he'd fallen through your window and into the good hanbok you'd been saving, the one Mother had commissioned for a birthday you weren't allowed to leave the tower to celebrate.
Pale jeogori embroidered along the collar with thread the color of new leaves, the chima falling in soft, heavy folds you'd never actually walked any real distance in, sash tied the way you'd practiced a hundred times alone in front of a mirror with no one to see it.
It felt strange, dressing for a world you'd never been allowed into. It felt stranger still, catching your own reflection in the dark window glass, to think that you might actually look like you belonged there.
Were youβ¦ scared? No. Surely not. You wanted this. Itβs practically your lifeβs purpose. But what about Mother? She had kept you safe and protected from the evils of that world for all your life and wouldnβt this be taking that protection for granted?Β
"You're stalling," Martin called, from somewhere near the window.
"I'm preparing."
"You've re-tied that sash three times."
"It has to sit correctly or it'll come loose on the climb down."
"It's a piece of fabric, not a structural pillarβ"
"Do you want my help escaping or not?"
That, at least, bought you the silence you needed to finish, smoothing the last fold flat with hands that weren't quite steady, and when you finally turned around he'd gone quiet in a different way, something briefly, helplessly caught in his expression before he covered it with a cough and a very deliberate glance toward the window.
"Ready?" he asked.
"Ready," you said, and meant it more than you expected to.
Getting out of the tower took considerably longer than getting in, mostly because you insisted on doing it via the long braided rope of your own hairβwhich made Martin's expression do something complicated and slightly ill when you explained the general mechanics of your situationβand partly because you stopped four separate times on the way down to look at things. A bird. The particular texture of the moss on the tower's stone base. Your own hands, dirt-smudged for the first time in your life, which you held up in the fading light like they belonged to someone else.
"You're doing something weird with your face," Martin said, from where he was waiting with visibly diminishing patience at the base of the waterfall.
"What thing."
"Theβ" he gestured at your entire self, "βwide-eyed newborn puppy thing. It's very slow."
"I've never touched a river before."
"You've touched water before."
"Not river water. It's cold. It's moving. Did you know it does that? Justβmoves, constantly, going somewhereβ"
"Incredible information. Truly a marvel of the natural world. Can weβ"
"Give me one more minute."
You did not give him one more minute. You gave him closer to ten, crouched at the edge of the water with your skirts hiked up and your bare feet in the current, laughingβactually laughing, a real sound you weren't sure you'd made before, not like this, not from somewhere this deepβwhile Martin stood a respectful distance away with his arms crossed and an expression that was trying very hard to stay annoyed and mostly failing.
"You know," he said, eventually, watching you, "for a girl who apparently thinks the entire world is trying to eat her alive, you're taking this remarkably well."
"I never said the world was trying to eat me."
"You have the exact energy of someone who was told that, yes."
You didn't answer that, because it was uncomfortably accurate, and instead climbed back up onto the bank and reached for the little cloth bag Mother had never let you leave without, purely out of habitβand then remembered you'd left the tower entirely, that Mother was three days out at her own errand, that there was no one to sneak anything past anymore, and the freedom of that thought hit you somewhere just under your ribs hard enough that you had to sit with it a second.
Martin was watching your face do something complicated.
"You okay, Princess?"
You blinked at him. "What did you call me?"
"Princess." He shrugged easily, like he'd been waiting for an excuse. "Means gongju. You know. Lost girl, hidden tower, guarded like she's made of something preciousβyou have to admit it tracks."
"I'm not a princess."
"I didn't say you were. I said it tracks." He was grinning now, delighted with himself in a way that made you want to throw something at him. "There's an actual missing princess, you know. Whole kingdom's been mourning her for eighteen years. Lanterns every year on her birthday, the whole thing. Iβm guessing thatβs what youβre trying to see. Funny coincidence, a girl locked in a tower wanting to see the exact same lanterns."
"Coincidences happen."
"Sure they do." He fell into step beside you, hands tucked behind his head, entirely too pleased with the theory he was clearly not going to let go of. "Or, alternatively, I could just call you 'princess.' Would you prefer that? Since you don't know what it means. I mean, I'm sure a sheltered young lady like yourself, freshly escaped from an entire lifetime in a stone tower, wouldn't be familiar with a word like that. Itβs English. Very obscure. Very advanced."
"I know what it means, I was born here, same as you."
"Do you though? Prove it."
"I'm not proving anything to you."
"Because you can't."
"Because it's beneath me."
"There it is," he said, snapping his fingers, delighted. "Gongju behavior if I've ever seen it."
"I will push you into the river."
"You're welcome to try, princess."
"You know what's funny," Martin said, a little while later, once you'd both fallen into an easier walking rhythm and the sun had dropped low enough to gild the tops of the trees. "You never actually told me your name."
You hesitated. It wasn't that you didn't have oneβMother had given you one, early, though she'd used it so rarely, always preferring darling or sweet girl or, when she was displeased, no name at all, just a long and pointed silenceβit was that saying it out loud to a stranger on your first night outside a tower felt like handing over something you weren't sure yet was safe to hand over.
"I'm not telling you."
"Why not?"
"Because you'll use it against me somehow. You seem like the type."
"I am offended." He didn't sound offended. He sounded thrilled, the way he sounded about most things that gave him new material to work with. "Fine. Keep your mystery. I'll just keep calling you gongju, then, and everyone we meet is going to assume you actually are the missing princess, and it'll be your fault when the whole kingdom starts a rumor."
"Nobody's going to believe that."
"You'd be surprised what people believe about a girl who climbs out of a tower on a rope made of her own hair."
You didn't have a good answer for that, mostly because it was, again, unfairly accurate, and you settled instead for shoving him lightly with your shoulder, which did nothing except make him laugh.
"Say it, then," you said. "Princess. If that's what you're going to call me, I want to actually hear you say the real word, not just the joke version."
He said itβproperly this time, no mockery in it, the vowels landing soft and familiar in a way that startled you a little, like hearing a song you hadn't realized you knew the words to.
"There," he said. "Happy?"
"You're still not calling me that."
"I'm absolutely calling you that. It's efficient. It's accurate, probably. And frankly," he added, glancing sideways at you with something almost gentle underneath the usual smugness, "it suits you better than whatever your actual name is going to turn out to be."
"You don't even know my actual name."
"I don't need to. I've got a working theory and I like it. A sheltered young lady," he said, drawing the words out with exaggerated care, "freshly liberated from a tower, apparently unfamiliar with basic Korean vocabularyβreally, it all fits."
"I am not unfamiliar with basicβ"
"Prove it. What's gongju mean, then, if you know it so well?"
"It means princess, and you know I know that, you're just being insufferable on purpose."
"On purpose and very successfully," he agreed, entirely too pleased with himself, and you gave up trying to win the argument and let yourself, instead, enjoy the specific, unfamiliar pleasure of being teased by someone who clearly wasn't trying to hurt you with it.
You did not push him into the river, mostly because you were fairly sure you'd fall in with him, but you thought about it, hard, the entire rest of the walk, while he hummed something tuneless and infuriating under his breath and Kono rode along in the fold of your sleeve making small disapproving noises every time Martin so much as glanced in your direction.
You noticed, though you weren't going to say it out loud, that he never actually stopped. Princess. Not once, the rest of that day, or the day after, or any of the days that came after that. It stuck the way nicknames only stick when the person using them has decided, somewhere below the joking, that they mean it.
The wanted poster was nailed to a tree at the first crossroads you came to, curling slightly at the corners from weather, and you might have walked right past it if Martin hadn't gone abruptly, suspiciously quiet beside you.
You looked. Then you looked again, closer, and had to physically bite down on the inside of your cheek to keep from laughing.
It was, unmistakably, himβsame jaw, same insufferable eyebrows, same general air of a man who thought quite highly of himselfβexcept that whoever had drawn it had rendered his mouth as a row of crooked, gap-toothed, wildly uneven teeth, snaggled in every direction like a fence that had lost a fight with a storm.
"That is not accurate," Martin yelled, very fast, snatching the poster down off the tree before you could get a proper look.
"That isβthat is artistic license, that is a hack sketch artist with a grudge and no talent, my teeth areβ" he actually opened his mouth to demonstrate, tilting his head back, and you had to admit, unwillingly, that his teeth were in fact very straight, surprisingly white, entirely unremarkable in the best possible way. "See? Perfect. Immaculate. I have never once in my life had a complaint about my teeth, I get compliments on my teethβ"
"From who?"
"Fromβpeople. Women. Discerning women with excellent taste who appreciate a goodβ"
"It says here you're a wanted thief," you hummed, reading over his shoulder now that he'd lowered the poster in his outrage, "with a reward ofβ" you did the math and had to stop and reread it, "βthat is a genuinely enormous amount of money."
"It's inflated. That's aβthat's a gross exaggeration of my worth, I'm not worth that much, this is clearly aβ"
"You're arguing that you're worth less than a wanted poster says?"
"I'm arguing that the number is inaccurate, there's a difference, the number is clearly designed to encourage overzealous bounty hunting, it's a scare tacticβ"
"So you agree you're worth stealing."
"That is notβthat is not what I said, you're twisting my words, this is exactly the kind of thing I was worried about when you insisted on coming along, you're going to misquote me to guards at some point and get us bothβ"
"I'm just reading what's written."
He scoffed and kicked a rock. "You're reading it with inflection."
"I'm reading it with my normal voice."
"You said 'genuinely enormous amount of money' like it was a personal insult to me specifically."
"You seem more upset about the teeth than the wanted part."
"Because the wanted part is accurate," he said, with the flat honesty of a man too distracted by dental slander to bother lying. "I am wanted. I did steal something. The teeth, though. The teeth are slander."
"What did you steal?"
He hesitatedβand it was the first genuinely unguarded pause you'd seen from him all dayβand then folded the poster into quarters and shoved it into his satchel with a little more force than necessary. "Doesn't matter. Ancient history. Water under the bridge."
"You stole it approximately six hours ago."
"Extremely ancient, in relative terms." He set off walking again, faster than before, and you had to jog a few steps to catch up, Kono digging tiny claws into your shoulder to keep his balance.
"You're not going to tell me."
"I am not."
"Is it the crown," you guessed, because you'd caught the edge of gold in the satchel earlier, glinting when Kono had dragged it across the floor, and you watched his shoulders go very slightly, very deliberately stiff.
"No," he said, in a tone that meant yes, and you decided, generously, to let him have it, mostly because you were far more interested in the actual horse that had just come thundering around the bend in the road, nostrils flaring, eyes locked on Martin with an expression of pure, personal, long-simmering rage.
"Oh, no," Martin said.
"Is thatβ"
"That is Woojoo, yes, that is my horse, that is a long, complicated relationshipβ"
Woojoo did not stop for pleasantries. He came at Martin like a man settling a debt, and the next several minutes dissolved into a genuinely spectacular chase around a small clearing that involved Martin climbing a tree, Woojoo standing guard at the base of said tree with the patient menace of a creature who had all the time in the world, and you sitting on a fallen log with Kono, watching, thoroughly entertained.
"He's not usually like this," Martin called down, from somewhere in the upper branches.
"He seems very consistent, actually."
"Okay, he's exactly like this, every time, it'sβwe have history, this horse and I, it's complicatedβ"
"He's a horse."
"He's vindictive, is what he is, he's been trying to get me arrested for two years, that's not normal horse behavior, that's a personal vendettaβ"
Kono made a small, delighted chattering noise beside you, which you were beginning to understand meant something close to finally, someone gets it, and when you glanced down at him he was watching Woojoo with what could only be described as newfound professional respect.
"What exactly did you do to him," you called up, watching Woojoo pace a slow, deliberate circle around the base of the tree, occasionally rearing to paw at the lowest branch just to remind Martin he had options.
"I didn't do anything, he's just been like this since I acquired him."
"You stole him."
"I acquired him. There's a nuance."
"From who?"
"From a royal stable, technically, but in my defense he was clearly unhappy there, high-strung, difficult, the stablemaster hated himβI did him a favor, honestly, and this is the thanks I get, two years of relentless, targeted footwear-based revengeβ"
Woojoo, as if personally offended by the retelling, reared up again with a furious whinny and got one hoof solidly against the trunk hard enough to shake the branch Martin was gripping, sending down a small shower of leaves and one extremely undignified yelp.
"He understood that," you gasped and shook your head. "He understood every word of that and he took offense."
"Horses don't understand language."
"This one might."
"This one is a menace, is what he is," Martin said, adjusting his grip with the particular caution of a man who had recently reconsidered his life choices, "a genuine menace who has decided, for reasons known only to himself, that his sole purpose on this earth is making my life difficultβ"
You decided, watching the standoff continue with no signs of resolving itself, that this was likely to go on for some time if left entirely to the two of them, and so you climbed down off your log, brushed off your skirts, and walked directly up to Woojoo with far more confidence than you actually felt.
He swung his great head toward you, ears pinned, nostrils flaring, and for a moment you thought you'd badly misjudged the situationβand then, slowly, his ears came up, and he leaned his head down toward you with something almost curious, blowing a warm breath across your palm when you held it out.
"There," you murmured. "See? I'm not the one who stole an apple from your feed bag."
"You heard about the apple thingβ" Martin's voice, muffled and betrayed, from somewhere above.
Woojoo made a low, satisfied sort of noise, nudging his nose against your shoulder, and you had the distinct impression, ridiculous as it was, that you had just been recruited onto a very specific and very committed team.
It took another twenty minutes, a great deal of undignified negotiating, andβeventuallyβyou stepping in to physically stand between horse and man with your hands raised in a gesture of peace, before Woojoo agreed, with visible reluctance, to a temporary truce, on the conditionβas far as you could interpret from a horse's expressionβthat he got to walk close enough to occasionally, "accidentally," step on the back of Martin's boot.
"This is humiliating," Martin muttered, as you all set off again, horse and dragon flanking either side of you like a pair of extremely judgmental honor guards.
"I think it's going great," you said, and meant it.
The hanok appeared out of the trees just as the light was going properly gray, low and wide-roofed in the old style, warm lantern-light spilling from its paper windows, smoke curling from a chimney with the smell of something roasting.
"Absolutely not," Martin said, the second he clocked it. "No. We're walking past this. This is a place I have specifically, personally, at great cost, learned to walk past."
"Why?"
"Because it's full of the single worst collection of degenerates in this entire kingdom, and every single one of them would sell me out for a fraction of that reward money without blinking."
"So we're not going in."
"We are absolutely not going in."
You went in.
In your defense, you hadn't fully decided to defy him so much as your feet had simply kept walking while your brain was still weighing the pros and cons, and by the time Martin caught up to grab your sleeve you were already three steps through the door. Into a low, smoke-hazed room packed with the strangest assembly of people you had ever seen in your entireβadmittedly very limitedβexperience of people.
There was a man built like a small mountain, missing most of his teeth, gently carving what appeared to be a delicate wooden hairpin. There was someone in the corner whose face you genuinely could not parse in the low lightβtoo many angles, somehow, like looking at a person through cracked glassβquietly mending a fan.
There were twin brothers arm-wrestling with murderous focus over what turned out, on closer inspection, to be a single dumpling. Someone had a pet weasel draped around their neck like a scarf. Someone else appeared to be knitting something with visibly too many needles. The whole room smelled like woodsmoke and old rice wine and something underneath that you couldn't place and didn't especially want to.
Every single head in the room turned when the door swung shut behind you.
"We're leaving," Martin said, very quietly, into your ear.
"Is that Martin Edwards?" said the mountain-sized man with the hairpin, in a voice that dropped the temperature of the room several degrees.
"No," Martin said.
"That's definitely him," said someone else.
"That is notβokay, fine, hi, yes, hello everyone, lovely establishment, we're just passing throughβ"
What followed was, by your private accounting, one of the strangest and best evenings of your entire life.
It started with the reward moneyβsomeone in the back producing a slightly more accurate wanted poster, teeth and all, and passing it around with escalating commentary, the twins, apparently named Seonghyeon and Juhoon, abandoning their dumpling war entirely to lean over and study Martin's face against the drawing with academic seriousnessβand slid, somehow, without your ever quite catching the exact moment it happened, into a full-throated, half-drunk, wildly enthusiastic taunting song, the whole room joining in verse by verse, about every humiliating thing anyone in the establishment had ever heard about Martin Edwards.
The man with the weasel started it, banging a wooden cup against the table for rhythm, and it snowballed from there the way these things always seemed to in a room full of people who'd clearly been waiting years for an excuse.
Oh, the boy who came from nowhere, with his smile and his fine clothesβthinks he's someone, thinks he's special, thinks the whole wide kingdom knows,
sang the man with the weasel, and the twins picked it up without missing a beat, still slightly out of breath from the dumpling war,
but we remember when he begged us for a bowl of rice, a place to sleepβnow he struts around in silk scraps calling himself something deep!
"That is one time," Martin said, to no one in particular, to the entire room, to the universe. "That was one specific winter,that is not a fair representative sample of myβ"
Nobody was listening. The person with too many needles had abandoned her knitting entirely to conduct the room like an orchestra, and Namjoon's booming baritone came in over the top of everyone else's,
Oh, his teeth are crooked as a fence line, oh, his hair's a rooster's crest, and the last time that he tried to smolder a fisherman's wife laughed so hard she fell in the river and had to be fished out herself β
which was, you gathered, not even remotely true and possibly the single funniest thing anyone had said all evening, judging by the way Martin's whole face went scarlet and the room dissolved into fresh, delighted chaos.
"That last one isn't even trueβ" Martin tried, over the singing, and got roundly ignored, and you watched, absolutely delighted, from your seat on an overturned barrel, as an entire room of strangers dismantled him verse by gleeful verse, and did not, notably, join inβnot because you weren't tempted, but because you found it far funnier to simply watch his face while it happened, the specific, put-upon suffering of a man who could not decide whether to laugh or storm out and kept landing, over and over, on some helpless combination of both.
There was something underneath the teasing, too, that you only half caughtβa warmth in it, the particular rough affection of people who'd known someone a long time and had earned the right to be cruel to him in a way that was really just another word for fond.
Namjoon clapped Martin on the shoulder hard enough to stagger him mid-verse and called him boy in a voice gone suddenly soft under all the noise.
You found yourself wondering, not for the first time that night, exactly how long ago it had been that a much younger Martin Edwards had first shown up in a place like this with nowhere else to go, and exactly what had happened to him before that, that a room full of thieves and degenerates had ended up feeling, to him, like the closest thing to family he had.
You filed the thought away to ask about later. You had a feeling it wasn't a question he'd answer easily, or sober, or with an audience.
"You're not even going to defend me," he said to you, mid-chorus, over the noise.
"I'm having a wonderful time."
"That is betrayal, that's what that isβ"
"They're not even wrong about the teeth thing."
"They are entirely wrong about the teeth thing, my teeth are fineβ"
Somewhere around the fourth verse, the man with the hairpinβwhose name, you'd gathered, was something like Namjoon, though it was hard to be sure over the singingβleaned across the table toward you with the particular intensity of someone who had decided you were the most interesting thing in the room.
"You," he pointed. "You have good energy. You've never danced on a table before, have you?"
"I've never been in a room before," you said, honestly, which seemed to delight him even further.
"Well," he said, standing, extending a huge, hairpin-carving hand toward you with genuine ceremony, "there's a first time."
You should have said no. You thought, distantly, of Mother's voice, of every warning about the danger and filth of the outside world, and then you thought about how good it had felt, hours ago, to have your bare feet in a river for the first time in your life, and you took the enormous man's hand and let him haul you, laughing, up onto the low wooden table.
It turned out you were, against every expectation, a genuinely excellent dancerβeighteen years of solitary practice in a round tower room had to be good for somethingβand the room roared its approval as you spun, skirts of your hanbok flaring out around your ankles, hair flowing, laughing so hard your ribs ached.
Martin stood below the table with an expression that had stopped being annoyed several minutes ago and had settled into something else entirely, something he was clearly trying very hard not to let show on his face and failing at almost completely.
The twins abandoned all pretense of arm-wrestling entirely to bang out a rhythm on the tabletop with the flats of their hands, and the man with the weasel produced, from some hidden pocket, a small reed flute he turned out to play with startling skill, weaving a quick, bright melody underneath the room's continued heckling of Martin, who had by now given up defending his teeth entirely and switched to a full, aggrieved commentary on the general injustice of his evening.
"This is not what I agreed to when I climbed through that window," he called up at you, though he was smiling despite himself, that same helpless, undone expression creeping further across his face with every spin you took. "I signed up for hiding. Quietly. In a tower. Notβthis. Not a full musical indictment of my character followed by you personally providing the evening's entertainment."
"You're welcome to join me," you called back, breathless, delighted, and watched with enormous satisfaction as his face went briefly, thoroughly panicked.
"Absolutely not."
"Coward."
"Strategist. There's a meaningful difference between the twoβ"
Namjoon, still clapping along from below, tipped his head back and roared with laughter loud enough to rattle the paper windows, and even Kono, perched safely on a high shelf out of the way of the chaos, seemed to have relaxed enough to bob his small head faintly along with the flute's rhythm, which you filed away as further evidence, alongside the nose-attack yet to come, that his feelings about Martin were considerably more complicated than his usual sniffing disdain let on.
It was, of course, at that exact momentβyou spinning, laughing, glowing in the lanternlight, framed perfectly in the hanok's single paper windowβthat the door burst open.
Mother stood in the frame, still dressed for travel, face utterly, terribly still, and every single sound in the room died at once.
You would replay the next thirty seconds for years afterward and never fully be able to piece together the order they happened in.
Mother's eyes found yours across the room and something in them cracked openβnot relief, you understood, even in the moment, even through the roaring in your ears. Not relief. Fury, dressed up as fear, the way it always was.
"You," Mother said, and her voice, even pitched low, even across a room gone suddenly silent, carried the way it always had, carved out of something colder than the room's actual temperature. She didn't shout. She never shouted; shouting would have meant losing something, and Mother did not lose things, she simply took them back. "Get down from there. Now."
You didn't move. You were aware, distantly, of how strange it wasβthat a woman who had raised you for eighteen years, whose voice had shaped nearly every rule you'd ever lived by, could stand in a doorway and still make your whole body want to obey before your mind had caught up to deciding whether it should.
"I was justβ"
"I don't care what you were just. Look at you. Look at what he's done to you already." Mother's eyes flicked, briefly, murderously, to Martin, standing frozen below the table. "This is exactly what I warned you about. Exactly. One night outside that tower and already you'reβ" she gestured, sharp and contemptuous, at the whole scene, the hanok, the strangers, your loosened hair, "β this."
"This is the most fun I've had in my entire life," you said, and heard your own voice shake only slightly.
Something in Mother's face did something complicatedβnot softened, not exactly, but shifted, the fury underneath it briefly, dangerously exposed. "That tower kept you safe."
"That tower kept me contained."
"There she is," said someoneβone of the guards behind Mother, you realized, a whole detail of them, come looking for the man on the wanted poster and finding, instead, considerably more than they'd bargained for.
The room dissolved into chaos.
Later, you would understand that half the hanok's patrons had their own reasons to want no part of a run-in with royal guards, and so what happened next was less an act of loyalty to you or Martin specifically and more a matter of shared, practical self-interestβbut in the moment it felt like nothing short of a miracle.
The mountain of a man with the hairpin suddenly hauling a table sideways to block the door, the twins scattering rice wine across the floor to send the first guard through it skidding, the person with too many needles somehow managing to tangle an entire coil of yarn around someone's ankles.
"Move, moveβ" Martin had you by the wrist, hauling you off the table and through a low doorway at the back of the hanok you hadn't even noticed, past a stack of firewood that Namjoon shoved aside with one huge hand to reveal a narrow black gap in the wall, barely wide enough for the two of you, sloping down into the dark.
"In, go, goβ" and then you were falling, more than climbing, into a tunnel that smelled of packed earth and old stone, Martin's hand fused to your wrist. Kono was a frantic weight against your collarbone, the sound of shouting and splintering wood fading fast above you as the two of you half-ran, half-stumbled through absolute blackness.
The tunnel was narrower than it had looked from the mouth of itβlow enough in places that Martin had to duck, cursing under his breath every time his shoulder caught stone, and twice the passage forked without warning, no light to guide the choice, nothing but Martin's hand tightening around yours and a muttered "left, I think, leftβ" that you had no way of verifying and every reason to simply trust.
Somewhere behind you, muffled through packed earth, you heard the unmistakable scrape of the firewood being shoved aside a second time, and a voiceβnot Mother's, one of the guards, sharp and close in a way that made your stomach dropβcalling that they'd found the passage.
"Faster," Martin breathed, and you didn't need telling twice, your bare palm scraping stone as you half-felt your way forward, heart slamming so hard you could feel it in your throat. The darkness pressed close enough on every side that for one disorienting stretch you lost all sense of which way was even forward anymore, trusting nothing but the grip of his hand and the sound of his breathing just ahead of you.
A light bobbed somewhere behindβtorchlight, catching the tunnel wall in a brief orange smear before you rounded another bend and lost it againβand you thought, with a clarity that cut cleanly through the panic, they're going to catch us, and then, right on its heels, absurdly, I don't even care, this is the most alive I have ever felt in my entire life.
You should have been terrified.
Some distant, sensible part of you understood that you were, technically, terrifiedβMother's face, the guards, the very real danger of the last thirty secondsβand yet underneath the fear was something so bright and enormous it eclipsed nearly everything else, something that had been building all day, all evening, every single moment since your feet first touched river water, and it broke open now in the pitch dark of that tunnel as something you could only describe as pure, uncut joy.
You were laughing. You realized it somewhere in the second minute of running, blind, hand in hand with a wanted thief, chased by your own mother's guards, and you were laughing so hard you could barely breathe, and Martinβsomewhere ahead of you in the dark, breathless himselfβstarted laughing too, and the two of you burst out of the far end of the tunnel into open moonlit air still half-doubled over, gasping, giddy, alive in a way you didn't have words for yet.
You collapsed against a fallen log at the tunnel's mouth, chest heaving, hair a wild mess around your shoulders, and looked up at the starsβmore of them than you'd ever seen from your tower window, spilled out edge to edge across the whole enormous skyβand thought, with a clarity that startled you: this. This is what I wanted.
"You," Martin said, still catching his breath beside you, staring at you like he was seeing something for the first time, "are a genuinely terrifying person."
"I danced on a table."
"You incited a riot."
"I think that was mostly you."
"No, that wasβokay, that was a little me, but youβ" he gestured at you, helplessly, at your wrecked hair and your flushed face and the grin you couldn't have wiped off if you tried, "βyou're supposed to be the sheltered one. The tower girl. And instead you're out here dancing on tables and outrunning royal guards on your first day of freedom like you were made for it."
"Maybe I was."
Something shifted in his face when you said thatβquick, unguarded, gone almost before you could catch itβand for a second neither of you said anything at all, just sat there in the moonlight with your shoulders nearly touching, breathing hard, the tunnel's dark mouth still gaping open behind you.
"Princess," he said, quieter now, no teasing in it at all.
"That's not my name."
"I know." He was still looking at you. "Doesn't mean it's not true."
You let the silence sit for a moment, the two of you still catching your breath, the tunnel's dark mouth gaping open behind you like something that had swallowed the version of yourself who'd walked into that hanok an hour ago and spat out someone slightly different.
"Can I ask you something," you said, eventually.
"You're going to anyway."
"That man. Namjoon. He called you boy like he'd known you a long time."
Something in Martin's face shuttered, just slightly, the easy grin dimming a few degrees without fully disappearing. "Long time's a strong way to put it."
"How long?"
He was quiet long enough that you thought he wasn't going to answer at all, picking at a loose thread on his sleeve with more focus than the thread deserved.
"I grew up in an orphanage," he said finally, not looking at you. "Not a nice one. The kind that stops feeding you the second you're old enough to feed yourself, more or less. I left when I was about twelve, lived rough for a while, and that placeβthat hanok, all those people you just watched sing an entire ballad about my teethβthat was the first place that ever fed me without asking anything back the first time I walked in half-starved and half my current size. So. Long time. Longer than I usually admit to strangers who hit me with singing bowls."
"I'm not a stranger anymore."
"No," he agreed, glancing at you sideways, something almost surprised in it, like he was only just now noticing that fact himself. "I suppose you're not."
"Is that why you steal things? Because nobody ever gave you anything, so you decided to just take it instead?"
"That's very poetic. Did you rehearse that."
"I'm asking a real question."
He exhaled, long, and looked back up at the stars instead of at you. "Something like that, probably. I used to tell myself it was about the money. One good score, enough to disappear somewhere nobody's ever heard the name Martin Edwards, buy myself an island, live like a king who answers to nobody."
He shrugged, and the shrug didn't quite land the way he probably wanted it to. "Lately I've started to suspect it was never really about the money at all. Might've just been about proving I could have something. Anything. That nobody could take away from me the way everything got taken when I was a kid."
You didn't say anything right away. You thought about eighteen years in a round tower, about a woman who called your safety love and meant, underneath it, control, about how you'd never once had anything that was fully, unquestionably yours eitherβnot your name, not your time, not even, until tonight, your own two feet standing wherever they wanted to stand.
"I think," you said slowly, "we might have more in common than you'd expect from a lost girl and a thief."
"You admit it, then. Princess."
"I admit nothing. I'm making an observation about orphaned longing, don't twist it into something else."
He laughed at thatβa real laugh, surprised out of himβand some of the tightness went out of his shoulders. "Orphaned longing. You really did rehearse that."
"I did not."
"You absolutely did, you've been sitting on that phrase since the tunnel."
"I have never sat on a phrase in my life," you said, with as much dignity as you could manage, and he laughed again, and the two of you sat there a while longer in the moonlight, not saying much else, letting the quiet settle into something that felt less like the awkward silence of strangers and more like the comfortable kind that came, usually, from people who'd known each other a great deal longer than one very strange day.
The next two days passed the way you imagined a fever mightβbright and disorienting and slightly unreal, every hour crowded with more new things than you'd experienced in the previous eighteen years combined.
You learned that Martin snored, faintly, when he slept sitting up against a tree, and that Woojoo had apparently made it his personal mission to step on his boots at every possible opportunity for the rest of what you assumed would be their entire acquaintance.
You learned that Kono had strong opinions about which berries were safe to eat and communicated them via a truly impressive range of disapproving noises. You learned the names of three separate mountain ranges, none of which matched the ones you'd painted from imagination, and foundβto your surpriseβthat you liked the real ones better.
You found a stream on the first afternoon, cold and clear and shallow enough to wade into without fear, and spent nearly an hour there simply standing in it, letting the current pull at the hem of your hanbok, while Martin sat on the bank pretending not to watch you and failing at it almost entirely.
When you splashed himβdeliberately, gleefully, without an ounce of remorseβhe retaliated with such wounded overcommitment that the two of you ended up soaked through within minutes, both of you laughing too hard to properly aim, Kono shrieking indignantly from a dry rock where he'd wisely relocated at the first sign of hostilities, and Woojoo watching the entire spectacle from the treeline with what you could only describe as profound equine disappointment in both of you.
You learned, too, in quieter moments, the shape of things Martin didn't say out loud.
The way he went very still and unusually gentle whenever you flinched at a loud noise, some old tower-bred instinct you hadn't fully shaken; the way he always, without seeming to think about it, put himself slightly between you and the road whenever another traveler passed.
The way he never once, not even once, asked why a girl who'd apparently never left a tower before knew so much about anatomy or herbs or the exact temperature at which honey turned to poison in the wrong hands, information you'd absorbed purely from Mother's paranoid insistence on preparing you for dangers that had never once, until this week, actually arrived.
You also learned, gradually, and against your own better judgment, that you liked Martin Edwards considerably more than you'd planned to.
He tried the smolder on the second evening, apropos of nothing, while you were both crouched by a small campfire waiting for a rabbit he'd insisted, with wild overconfidence, that he knew how to properly cook.
You caught him doing it out of the corner of your eye firstβa slow, deliberate turn of his head toward you, chin dropping slightly, eyes going half-lidded and soft in a way that was clearly meant to be devastating, one eyebrow lifting with the practiced precision of a man who had, you suspected, spent real time perfecting this exact expression in the reflection of still water.
You stared at him.
He held the look.
You kept staring.
He held it a little longer, jaw set, the corner of his mouth doing something you assumed was supposed to read as rakish,and you watched, fascinated, as the muscles around his eye began, very slightly, to twitch with the effort of maintaining it.
"What are you doing," you said finally.
The smolder collapsed instantly, entirely, like a tent losing its center pole. "Nothing."
"You were doing something with your face."
"I was not doing anything with my face, that's just my face, that's how my face looksβ"
"Your face looked like you were having some kind of episode."
"That," Martin said, with wounded dignity, turning very deliberately back to the fire, "is called charisma, and it has worked on every singleβyou know what, never mind. Forget it. Rabbit's probably done."
"Try it again."
He looked at you, suspicious. "Why."
"I want to see if it's worse the second time or if that was just a fluke."
"It is not going to be worse, it is going to be exactly as devastating as the first time, I simply chose not to fully commit to it because I was distracted by the rabbitβ"
"Prove it."
He set his jaw, visibly gathering himself, and tried againβchin dropping, eyes half-lidding, that same eyebrow rising with what was clearly meant to be effortless, smoldering confidenceβand made it a full three seconds before a piece of ash popped from the fire close enough to his knee that he flinched, hard, breaking the whole expression apart into a startled yelp that had absolutely nothing rakish about it whatsoever.
You laughed so hard you had to set down the stick you'd been roasting your portion of rabbit on, doubling over, and Martin sat there looking deeply, personally betrayed by an ember.
"That doesn't count," he said, with the flat, aggrieved certainty of a man who knew perfectly well that it counted completely. "That was an unrelated incident. The face itself was flawless right up until the interruption."
"I've genuinely never seen anything less flawless in my life."
"You've been alive for four days outside a tower, your knowledge is extremely limitedβ"
"I've seen Woojoo make a more convincing case for himself."
"Now you're just being cruel."
"I'm being honest," you said, wiping at your eyes, and he huffed, and threw a small twig at you that you batted easily out of the air, and the two of you settled back into an easy quiet, the fire popping softly between you, Woojoo a dark, watchful shape at the edge of the clearing, apparently satisfied enough with the evening's proceedings to have stopped glaring, for once.
The rabbit was not, in fact, done, nor would it ever really achieve a state you could confidently call cooked, and you ate it anyway, sitting close enough to the fire that your shoulders kept brushing, and somewhere in the space of that mealβburnt, underdone, genuinely one of the worst things you'd ever eaten and yet somehow, impossibly, one of your favorite meals of your entire lifeβyou caught yourself watching the firelight move across his face and thinking, with a lurch you weren't at all prepared for, oh. Oh, no.
Kono, curled in your lap, looked up at you with an expression you were beginning to read with alarming fluency, and it said, quite clearly: I saw that. We are going to discuss this later.
"Shut up," you told him, out loud, and Martin glanced over.
"I didn't say anything."
"Not you." You nodded down at Kono, who flicked his tail smugly. "Him."
"That thing has never liked me."
"He doesn't like anyone."
"He likes you."
"I raised him from an egg, that's different."
"Sure." Martin was smiling now, small and real, none of the practiced charm from earlier, just something quieter underneath it. "He's very protective. It's actually a little sweet. In aβweirdly feral, judgmental sort of way."
"Don't call my dragon feral."
"I would never," he said, entirely unconvincingly, and you laughed, and Kono made a noise of deep personal offense, and somewhere above you the first stars were coming out over a sky that would, tomorrow night, on the night of your birthday, fill entirely with gold.
The village you passed through the next morning was small and half-asleep, a scatter of tile-roofed houses along a single dusty road, a well at the center where two old women stood gossiping over their buckets, a market just beginning to set up its stalls in the cool early lightβand you stood at the edge of it for a long moment, just looking, before Martin had to physically steer you forward by the shoulder.
"You're doing the thing again."
"I've never seen a market before."
"You've never seen anything before, that's becoming a running theme of this trip." But he said it gently, none of his usual bite in it, and let you drift from stall to stall at your own paceβa woman selling dried persimmons strung on twine, a man with a cart of polished wooden combs, a girl not much younger than you hawking little clay bells that chimed high and sweet when you touched them.
You bought nothing, because you had no money, a fact that seemed to strike Martin as personally intolerable the moment he noticed you eyeing a small painted fan for the third time.
"Here," he said, and before you could stop him he'd produced a string of coins from somewhere inside his jacketβyou didn't ask where, and strongly suspected you didn't want to knowβand pressed them into the fan-seller's hand with the easy, practiced charm of a man who did this sort of thing often, emerging a moment later to hand you the fan with a small, exaggerated bow. "For the gongju."
"You don't have to do that."
"I know I don't have to. I'm choosing to. There's a difference, I keep telling you this."
You turned the fan over in your handsβpainted with a scene of cranes over a lake, delicate, nothing like the practical, sturdy things Mother had ever allowed youβand felt something in your chest go warm and a little overwhelmed, the specific ache of being given something small and unnecessary and entirely, purely kind.
"Thank you," you said, and meant it more than the words could really carry.
"Don't get used to it," Martin said, though his ears had gone faintly pink again, the way they did whenever you caught him being sincere. "I have a reputation to maintain. Ruthless. Self-interested. Very hard to impress."
"You just bought a stranger a fan."
"I bought you a fan, that's different, you're notβ" he seemed to catch himself, some thought crossing his face he clearly hadn't meant to say out loud, and cleared his throat instead. "Anyway. We should keep moving. Overlook's still a few hours off, and I'd like to actually get you there with enough daylight to see the view properly."
You let him change the subject, mostly because you weren't sure you were ready either to examine what he'd almost said, but you tucked the fan carefully into your sleeve, next to Kono, who eyed it with mild suspicion before apparently deciding it posed no threat to his position and settling back down.
The two of you left the village with Woojoo laden down, somewhat improbably, with a small sack of persimmons Martin had also boughtβ"for the horse," he'd said, unconvincingly, though you both knew perfectly well who was going to end up eating most of themβand walked the rest of the morning in an easy, comfortable quiet, broken only occasionally by Martin pointing out landmarks, or you asking questions about the world that he answered, more and more, without any of the teasing he'd led with the day before.
"Can I ask you something," you said, somewhere around midday, watching the road unspool ahead of you toward hills that were, slowly, beginning to look less like mountains and more like the gentler rise of land near a coast.
"You keep asking me that like I have a choice."
"Why haven't you left? You could've, a dozen times by now. You've got your satchel, you've got a truce with Woojoo, you could've slipped off in the night and I'd never have caught you."
He was quiet for a moment, watching the road rather than you. "I've thought about it."
"And?"
"And I keep not doing it," he said, simply, like the answer surprised him as much as it seemed to surprise you. "Which is new. Historically I'm very good at leaving. It's sort of my whole thing. Get in, get what I need, get out before anyone gets attached, especially me." He glanced sideways at you, something wry and a little helpless in it. "You're making that considerably more difficult than usual, gongju."
You didn't have a response for thatβnot one you trusted yourself to say out loud, anywayβso you reached over instead and took his hand, the way you had at the tunnel's mouth, easy and instinctive, and he let you, lacing his fingers through yours without missing a step, and the two of you walked the rest of the afternoon that way, hands linked, saying nothing else about it at all.
You reached the overlook above the harbor just as the sun was beginning its long slide toward the water, the whole kingdom spread out below you in a way you'd only ever seen painted, and painted badly, from your own imaginationβthe palace roofs catching the last light, the sea beyond the harbor gone molten copper, boats coming in for evening with their sails full and orange.
"There it is," Martin said, quieter than you'd heard him yet, standing close beside you at the edge of the outlook. "Home of your mysterious lantern people."
You didn't answer right away. You were looking at the palaceβthe actual palace, not the vague shape you'd always imagined from your tower window, but real, close enough now to make out individual roof tiles, individual windows catching fire in the sunsetβand something in your chest was doing something you didn't entirely have language for. A pull. An ache, low and old, like a bruise you hadn't known was there until someone pressed it.
"You okay?" Martin asked.
"I don't know," you said, honestly. "It feels likeβ" you struggled for it, and gave up trying to find the exact shape of the feeling, settling instead for the closest true thing you had. "It feels like coming home to a place I've never been."
He was quiet for a moment, watching you rather than the view.
"In all honesty," he said, "I think you're going to like it there. Whatever it turns out to be, wherever it turns out you're from. I think the whole world's better with you loose in it, gongju. Bowl and all."
You looked at him with the last of the sunset gold across his face, that ridiculous, sincere, unguarded expression he clearly hadn't meant to let you seeβand you thought about tunnels and rivers and burnt rabbit and a hanok full of strangers singing about his teeth, and you thought, with the same clarity you'd had at the mouth of that tunnel two nights ago: this. I want this. Whatever this is turning into, I want it.
"Come on," you said instead, because you weren't brave enough yet to say the other thing, and reached for his hand, lacing your fingers through his like it was the easiest, most obvious motion in the world. "There's a boat down there with our name on it. I have a light show to see."
Below you, the first lanterns of the evening were already beginning to lift off the water, small and gold and multiplying, rising slow and steady into a sky gone the deep, glowing blue of early darkβand somewhere out past the harbor, thousands more were waiting to join them, waiting, though you didn't know it yet, for you.
Martin's hand tightened around yours.
"After you, princess," he said, and the two of you started down the hill together, toward the water, toward the light.
The boat Martin foundβborrowed, he insisted, with a straight face that fooled absolutely no one, from a dock crowded with a dozen identical little wooden craft, all of them clearly rented out for exactly this evening, exactly this purposeβwas small and low and smelled faintly of fish, and rocked alarmingly when you first climbed in, enough that you grabbed for his arm and he grabbed for the side of the boat and Kono, riding in your collar, made a noise of profound and specific betrayal at being jostled.
"Careful," Martin said, steadying you with a hand at your waist that lingered maybe half a second longer than strictly necessary, and you were fairly sure, from the way his ears had gone slightly pink, that he'd noticed it too.
Woojoo, denied entry to the boat on account of being an entire horse, watched the proceedings from the dock with an expression of deep personal injury, and had to be bribed with the promise of an extra ration of feed before he'd agree to wait, tail swishing, ears pinned, radiating the specific fury of a creature left behind on the one night that mattered.
"He'll forgive you eventually," you said, as Martin pushed off from the dock with a long oar, the little boat gliding out onto water gone glassy and still with the coming dark.
"He has never forgiven me for anything in his entire life. I stole an apple from his feed bag once, two years ago, and I am fairly sure he still brings it up in whatever passes for a horse's internal monologue."
"Poetic justice."
"You're supposed to be on my side."
"I'm on Kono's side. And apparently Woojoo's. You seem to have accumulated a great many enemies for one man."
"They're not enemies," Martin said, settling the oar and letting the boat drift, "they'reβcreatures with very high standards who happen to have chosen me as their personal project. It's a compliment, really, if you think about it correctly."
"I don't think that's what a compliment is."
"You'll come around."
The kingdom had gone properly dark behind you now, the palace a black shape against a sky just beginning to prickle with stars, and the harbor water held every scattered lantern-light in perfect, trembling reflection, so that it felt, floating there, like you were suspended between two skiesβone above, one below, and you in the exact still center of both.
"It's almost time," you said, quiet, watching the palace. Something in your chest had gone tight and expectant, the same old ache from the overlook, except closer now, close enough that you thought you might be able to name it if you sat with it a little longer.
Martin didn't say anything. He'd gone still too, watching you rather than the palace, in a way you were becoming increasingly, helplessly aware of.
And then the first note soundedβa low horn, from somewhere within the palace walls, carrying clean and mournful across the waterβand the sky above the towers began, all at once, to fill with gold.
all those days, watching from the windows
You had watched this exact sight, every year of your life, from a single round window a mile up a mountainside, small and distant and never once close enough to feel the heat of the paper or hear the soft rush of a thousand wicks catching flame at once. You had painted it, badly, from memory, over and over, never quite able to get the specific quality of the light right, the way it wasn't quite gold and wasn't quite orange but some living color in between, restless, warm, endlessly multiplying.
Nothing you had ever painted came close.
now i'm here, blinking in the starlight
now i'm here, suddenly i see
standing here
The lanterns rose in waves, not all at once but in long, cascading pulsesβa hundred, then another hundred, then more than you could count, drifting up from courtyards and rooftops and the decks of boats all across the harbor, joining together into a slow, vast river of light climbing the dark sky. The water around your little boat filled with their reflections until it was impossible to say, looking down, where the true lanterns ended and the false ones beganβgold above you, gold below you, and you sitting in the very middle of it with your breath caught somewhere behind your ribs.
"Oh," you said, which was not remotely adequate to the size of what you were feeling, but was all you had.
"Yeah," Martin said, softly, and when you looked over at him he wasn't watching the lanterns at all. He was watching you, your face lit gold and trembling with reflected light, your eyes wide and wet in a way you hadn't quite noticed until you felt the first tear slip free and had to laugh, embarrassed, wiping at it with the back of your wrist.
"I've waited my whole life for this."
"I know."
"I didn't even know what I was waiting for. I just knew that every year, this light showed up in the sky, and something in me hurt, every time, and I never understood why, and now I'm sitting here and I still don't fully understand why except that it feels likeβ" you struggled for it again, the same struggle as the overlook, except this time you didn't let yourself give up on finding the words.
and the world has somehow shifted.
"It feels like they were waiting for someone. And some enormous, stupid, hopeful part of me has always believed, without any evidence at all, that the someone was me."
Martin was quiet for a long moment, and when you glanced at him his expression had gone soft and unguarded in a way you'd only caught glimpses of beforeβat the campfire, at the mouth of the tunnel, never allowed to sit still on his face long enough for you to really look at it.
"For what it's worth," he said, "I think it probably was."
all at once, everything looks different... now that i see you.
Reaching into his satchel, he drew out two lanternsβsmall, folded flat, clearly purchased at some point during the walk down from the overlook, though you hadn't noticed him buying them, too absorbed in the viewβand passed one across to you, along with a little punk of glowing incense to light the wick.
"I got us our own," he said, almost shy about it, which did not suit him at all and which you found, helplessly, endearing anyway. "Figured you shouldn't have to just watch other people's."
Your hands weren't quite steady as you unfolded the paper frame and touched the flame to the wick, the lantern blooming gold between your palms, warm and alive, straining gently upward the way they all did, wanting badly to join the great river of light rising above you.
"Make a wish," Martin said. "Isn't that the tradition? Birthday girl gets a wish."
You looked at him, sharp. "I never told you it was my birthday."
He had the grace, at least, to look faintly caught out. "You didn't have to. Lost princess, mysterious lantern obsession, refuses to give her real name, gets misty over a light show that happens on one specific night of the yearβI put it together somewhere around the singing-bowl incident, honestly."
"You've known this whole time."
"I've suspected this whole time. There's a difference. I was being polite about it."
"You've been calling me gongju for two days as a joke."
"I've been calling you gongju for two days because I was fairly confident, and also because it made you make that specific face you're making right now, which I happen to enjoy a great deal." He nodded down at the lantern cupped in your hands, steering neatly away from the moment before you could examine it too closely. "Make your wish, princess. Before it burns your fingers."
You held the lantern a moment longer, warm light spilling up between your hands onto your face, and thoughtβnot about the kingdom below, not even about the parents you didn't yet know you had, waiting somewhere in that dark palace with a hope they'd never once let themselves fully abandon. But about the man sitting across from you in a stolen boat, teeth genuinely, infuriatingly perfect, watching you like you were the only light on the entire water worth looking at.
You didn't say the wish out loud. But you let it go anyway, watched it rise and catch the current of wind that carried it up to join the thousands of others, and when you looked back down, Martin was still watching you, close enough now that you could count, if you'd wanted to, every one of his eyelashes.
"Your turn," you said, a little breathless.
He lit his own lantern, let it rise, and didn't look away from you while he did itβno smolder this time, none of the careful, practiced charm from the campfire that had made you laugh at him. Just him, looking at you, plain and raw and slightly disbelieving of his own luck Like a man who'd broken into a random tower to hide from two very angry brothers and found, instead of an empty room, the entire rest of his life.
"I'm not going to tell you what I wished for," he said, "but I will say it involves considerably less running from armed men than my last several wishes."
"That's a low bar."
"I'm a man of variety."
You laughedβyou couldn't help it, the sound coming out watery and warmβand somewhere in the laugh, without either of you quite deciding to, the space between you closed, his hand finding yours again in the bottom of the boat, and you found yourself leaning in, slow, the way the whole evening had been slow and inevitable since the moment he tumbled through your window, and he leaned in too, and for one full suspended second, gold light drifting down all around you like something out of a legend, you thoughtβthis. This is the thing I've been aching for every single year I watched it from too far away.
Kono chose that exact moment to launch himself, with great personal indignation, off your shoulder and directly onto the bridge of Martin's nose.
"Owβ" Martin reeled back, more startled than hurt, batting uselessly at the small dragon now clinging to his face with all four clawed feet and radiating profound betrayal. "Your dragon justβhe attacked me, did you see that, he full-onβ"
"He's protective," you said, laughing so hard you had to hold the sides of the boat to keep from tipping, tears mixing with the ones already on your face, watching Kono glare down at Martin from the very tip of his nose like a small, furious guardian spirit who had absolutely no intention of allowing anything interesting to happen without express supervision.
"He is feral, is what he isβ"
"He likes you," you said, wiping your eyes, still laughing. "This is how he shows it. Trust me. If he actually hated you, you'd know."
"This does not feel like liking, this feels like an assassination attemptβ"
Kono flicked his tail, unbothered, and settled himself with great satisfaction directly between the two of you on the boat's narrow bench, clearly intending to remain there for the foreseeable future, a small, smug, iridescent chaperone against a sky still falling gold, lantern light rippling gently across the water in every direction, thousands of tiny floating wishes drifting home at last to a girl who'd spent eighteen years wondering, in the quiet dark of a tower window, whether anyone out there was waiting for her.
They had been. All along. And now, impossibly, so was he.
You looked at Martin over the top of Kono's indignant, iridescent head, both of you still laughing, both of you still close enough to feel the warmth radiating off each other in the cooling night air, and you thought that whatever happened next. Whatever the palace held, whatever answers waited for you at the bottom of that harbor, whatever Mother would do when she finally caught up to you, because you had no illusions that she wouldn'tβthis part, right here, the boat and the gold light and the ridiculous, wounded dragon and the ridiculous, wonderful man across from you, was a part you were never, ever going to forget.
"Happy birthday, gongju," Martin said, quiet, over the top of a still-hissing Kono, and you thought, looking at him, that for the first time in your entire life, you actually believed it.
Laterβmuch later, after the last of the lanterns had burned low and drifted, spent, back down toward the water, after Woojoo had forgiven you both just enough to let Martin scratch behind his ears without incident, after Kono had finally abandoned his post between you to curl up, smug and victorious, in the fold of your sleeveβyou rowed the little boat back toward shore in a silence that wasn't empty at all. It was full instead of everything neither of you had quite said yet, the two of you sitting close enough that your knees kept knocking together with every small motion of the water.
You didn't know yet what waited for you at the top of that hillβwhat the palace would say when a girl with hair like sunlight walked through its gates for the first time in eighteen years, what Mother would do when she finally caught up to the two of you, what it would cost, in the end, to keep any of this. You only knew that you didn't want the night to be over, that some small, stubborn, hopeful part of you had already decided, somewhere between the singing bowl and the lantern light, that whatever came next, you wanted to face it with your hand in his.
"What happens now?" you asked, quiet, as the shore came slowly closer, torchlight from the docks beginning to flicker gold across the water to meet you.
Martin was quiet for a moment, considering the question with more weight than his usual answers ever carried.
"I don't know," he admitted, finally. "I've never actually planned past the running-away part before. Usually there isn't a now. There's just the next place to be, and the next, and I never stick around long enough to find out what comes after."
"And this time?"
He looked at you, truly and deeply gazed. It was the way he had at the overlook, at the tunnel's mouth, at every unguarded moment he'd let slip through the cracks of his own careful charm over the past four daysβand something in his face settled, like a decision he'd already made without quite admitting it to himself.
"This time," he hummed, "I think I'd like to find out."
The boat bumped gently against the dock, and somewhere above you, one last, late lantern rose alone into the dark, gold and small and stubborn, chasing after all the others that had gone before itβand you thought, watching it go, that it looked exactly like hope.
Morning came in gray and soft, mist lying low over the harbor the way it did most mornings this close to the water, and you woke tucked against the base of a fishing boat with Kono curled warm against your throat and Martin already awake beside you, satchel across his shoulder, watching the fog with an expression you didn't much care for.
"You're making a weird face," you said, sitting up, voice still thick with sleep. "This like... stiff, deciding-something face."
"I don't have a stiff, deciding-something face."
"You absolutely do. You had it right before you climbed through my window and you have it right now."
He exhaled, and some of the careful blankness dropped away, replaced by something more honestβnervous, almost, in a way that didn't suit him nearly as well as the sarcasm usually did. "I want to do this properly. Whatever this is turning into." He nodded down at the satchel, at the unmistakable shape of the crown inside it. "I know people who'll take this off my hands for real money, enough that neither of us has to run from anything ever again. I want to trade it, clean, and come back for you, and thenβI don't know. Figure out the rest. Together, if you'll have me."
"You could just give it back."
"I could," he agreed, "and normally I'd have laughed you out of the harbor for suggesting it. But I'm finding, lately, that a lot of things that used to make sense don't anymore, and a lot of things I never used to consider are starting to sound like exactly what I want." He reached out, tucked a loose strand of hair back from your face, unbearably gentle about it. "Wait for me here. I won't be long."
"You'd better not be."
"Princess." He said it soft, like a promise rather than a joke, and pressed one quick, warm kiss to your forehead before you could think of anything clever enough to say back. "I'll be back before the fog burns off. I swear it."
You watched him go, satchel bouncing against his hip, Woojoo trailing reluctantly after him with the particular resigned loyalty of a creature who'd decided, against every instinct, to trust his rider one more timeβand you sat there on the damp dock with Kono in your lap, watching the mist swallow him up, and told yourself, firmly, that the ache in your chest was nothing. Just morning cold. Just nerves. Nothing at all like fear.
The fog thickened instead of burning off, and the longer you waited the worse the ache in your chest got, until you couldn't sit still any longer and started pacing the dock's edge, Kono clinging tight to your shoulder, both of you straining to hear anything at all beyond the slow slap of water against the pilings.
You heard voices first. They were low and harsh, more than one man, coming from somewhere off along the tree line past the last of the boatsβand against every ounce of good sense you had left, you went toward them instead of away.
You found the clearing just past the fog's thickest bank, and what you found there stopped your heart cold: Martin on his knees in the mud, satchel gone, two enormous men standing over himβone you'd recognize instantly from the way Martin had gone rigid at the mere mention of them days ago, though you'd never learned their names until this moment.
Sunghoon. Jay. Buff, scarred, furious, and entirely unbothered by the fact that Martin was bleeding from a split lip and still trying, uselessly, to talk his way out.
"You cut us out," Sunghoon was saying, low and dangerous. "Two years of work, and you cut us out for a girl."
"It wasn't like thatβ"
"Save it." Jay's boot connected with Martin's ribs, and you had to bite down hard on your own hand to keep from crying out. "We'll take the crown. And we'll take the reward for you too. Two birds."
And then, from somewhere behind them, a voice you knew better than your own heartbeat, cool and pleasant and utterly without mercy.
"Gentlemen," Mother said, stepping out of the mist like she'd been waiting there all along, "I believe I can make this considerably more profitable for everyone involved."
You didn't understand, in the moment, what you were watchingβonly that Mother produced a small purse of coin, that Sunghoon and Jay's fury seemed to shift, calculating, weighing a better offer, that Martin's face went from pained to something close to horrified the second he understood what was happening.
"Don't," he said, to Mother, voice raw. "Whatever you're planningβleave her out of it. She doesn't have to be part of this."
"She has always been part of this," Mother said, almost gently, crouching down to his level with the particular tenderness she'd once reserved, you realized with a sick lurch, entirely for you. "You simply made the mistake of thinking you'd earned a say in it."
You didn't see exactly what happened nextβa scuffle, Martin shouting your name once, sharp and desperate, before something struck him and the sound cut offβbecause Mother had already turned, unerringly, toward the tree line where you stood frozen, and her eyes found yours through the fog with a precision that told you she'd known exactly where you were the entire time.
"There you are," she said, soft, and something about the softness was so much worse than the fury from the hanok. "Come along, darling. I think it's well past time we had a talk."
You ran. You didn't get far.
By the time the fog burned off, you were sitting in the belly of a small, windowless room that smelled of salt and old ropeβnot the tower, you understood dimly, some hidden place along the coast Mother had clearly kept in reserve for exactly this kind of contingencyβwrists bound loosely, more out of formality than real restraint, because Mother had never needed rope to keep you where she wanted you. She'd only ever needed your own heart, turned carefully against itself.
"He left, you know," she said, arranging herself on the room's single stool with the composure of a woman discussing the weather. "The moment those men offered him a way out, he took it. The crown. The reward money for turning you in besides, I'd imagineβa tidy sum for very little effort." She sighed, and it might almost have sounded sympathetic, if you hadn't spent eighteen years learning exactly how much genuine feeling lived underneath that particular sigh. "I saw the ship myself. Sailing out with the morning tide. I'm so sorry, darling. I did try to warn you what the world was like."
"You're lying."
"Am I?" She tilted her head, and something flickered behind her eyesβnot doubt, never doubt, but the faint, familiar satisfaction of a woman watching a plan click neatly into place. "You've known him four days. I've kept you safe for eighteen years. Which of us, do you truly think, has earned your trust?"
You wanted, badly, to believe it was a lieβevery instinct in your chest screamed that it wasβand yet some old, deep, tower-shaped part of you, the part that had spent a lifetime being told the world was cruel and that Mother alone could be counted on, curled up small and aching and terribly, terribly willing to believe her anyway. That was the cruelest part of it. Not the lie itself, but how easily, after everything, it still found purchase.
"I want to go home," Mother said, standing, brushing invisible dust from her skirts. "Not the towerβsomewhere new, somewhere he'll never think to look, somewhere I can keep you properly this time. You'll thank me for it, eventually. You always do."
You didn't answer. You sat very still in the dim, salt-smelling dark, and thought about a boat full of lantern light, and a man who'd bought you a fan for no reason at all, and a dragon who'd bitten his nose out of pure, ridiculous devotionβand something in you, quiet but absolutely unshakeable, refused, even now, even with the doubt gnawing at your ribs, to fully believe the story Mother was selling.
Martin woke in a cell.
His head throbbed, his ribs ached with every breath, and it took him several long, disoriented minutes to piece together that the last thing he rememberedβMother's voice, your name torn out of his throat, the world going darkβhad apparently ended with him here, iron bars, straw floor, and a guard outside who addressed him, with unmistakable relish, by the exact reward figure printed on his wanted poster.
"They're saying you kidnapped a girl," the guard said, almost cheerful about it. "Some noble's daughter. Word is the hanging's set for sundown. Shame about the teeth, by the wayβheard the sketch was more flattering than the real thing."
"I did not kidnap anyone," Martin gritted, with the flat, exhausted fury of a man repeating himself for the fifth time, "and my teeth are fineβ" and then stopped, because none of that mattered even slightly next to the one thought currently eclipsing everything else in his skull: she thinks I left her.
He didn't remember much of what happened after thatβonly that somewhere past midnight, a small, furious, iridescent shape came skittering through the cell's single high window, having tracked him across half the coastline on nothing but sheer stubborn will. Not long after, the cell door groaned open from the outside to reveal Namjoon's enormous, grinning face, flanked by the twins, the man with the weasel, and, filling the corridor behind them with visible, righteous indignation, one extremely large, extremely unimpressed horse.
"Heard you got yourself in trouble," Namjoon said. "Figured we'd come see if the rumors about your teeth were the only thing worth breaking you out for."
"I could kiss every single one of you," Martin said, already moving.
"Please don't," said one of the twins, Juhoon. "We heard about the fisherman's wife."
He found you by the coast road at dusk, Mother's carriage rattling ahead through the last of the fading light, and there was no time for a plan, no time for anything except Woojoo breaking into a dead run with Martin bent low over his neck and Kono clinging, white-knuckled, to his collar, the whole ragged, impossible rescue party thundering after a carriage carrying away the only thing that had ever made the running feel like it was going somewhere.
He caught them at the cliff road, where the trees gave way to open sky and the sea spread out gray and endless below, and Mother, seeing him, didn't so much as flinch.
"Persistent," she said, stepping down from the carriage alone, something cold and final settling into her face. "I did wonder if you'd manage it."
"Let her go."
"She's not yours to demand things about." Mother's eyes flicked past him, to where you'd appeared in the carriage doorway. His wrists finally free, staring at Martin like you couldn't quite trust the sight of himβbruised, breathless, undeniably, impossibly there. "Tell him, darling. Tell him what you told me. That you understand now. That the world outside only ever takes."
"I told you I didn't believe you," you said, voice shaking but clear, stepping down onto the road. "I still don't."
Something in Mother's composure cracked, just slightly, just enough. "You would choose him. After everything I've given you. Everything I've sacrificed."
"You didn't give me anything," you said, and the words came out steadier than you felt, eighteen years of swallowed truth finally finding air. "You took me. There's a difference. I've only just learned it, but I've learned it completely."
What happened next happened fast, and badly, the way real danger always doesβMother lunging, a blade you hadn't seen catching the last of the light, Martin throwing himself between the two of you with no more thought than he'd given anything else reckless and right over the past four days, and then the sharp, terrible sound of metal finding flesh, and Martin going down hard onto the cliff road with blood already spreading dark across his side.
"Martinβ"
"I'm fine," he said, which was so obviously, catastrophically untrue that you didn't even bother arguing, dropping to your knees beside him, hands already pressing hard against the wound, some old instinct screaming at you to sing, sing the old words, the ones Mother used every time she needed the magic, and you opened your mouth to do exactly thatβ
"Don't," Martin said, gripping your wrist with what strength he had left, eyes finding yours through the pain with a clarity that cut straight through everything else. "If you do thatβif you use it nowβshe'll never let either of us go. Not really. Not ever. She'll just keep finding a reason to need you broken enough to fix."
"I can't just let youβ"
"You can," he said, "trust me, princess, pleaseβ" and reached, with the last of his strength, for the small blade at his own belt, the one he'd used to fillet fish and cut rope and once, memorably, threaten a very rude tax collector, and before you fully understood what he meant to do, he'd taken hold of your long braid and cut, clean through, several feet of gold-shot hair falling away into the dirt at once, severed for good.
The change was immediate and terrible. The cut length dulled from gold to something ordinary and plain even as it fell, and Motherβmid-motion, reaching for you, for the hair, for the magic she'd spent a hundred years stealingβmade a sound you would never, for the rest of your life, be able to fully forget.
Her hands went first, skin creasing and thinning before your eyes, decades collapsing into her all at once, unstoppable now that the last thread keeping her young had been severed for good.
She staggered back toward the cliff's edge, aged a hundred years in the space of ten seconds, and the wind off the sea did the rest, catching what was left of her and scattering it, gray and weightless, out over the water until there was nothing left standing on the road at all.
You didn't watch it finish. You were already turned back to Martin, hands shaking, pressing uselessly against a wound that wasn't healing, that had no reason left to heal, because the magic that could have done it lay scattered in cut hair and ash somewhere behind you.
"Hey," Martin said, voice going thin, "heyβdon't do that face, the face you're doingβ"
"Don't you dare," you said, furious and breaking all at once. "Don't you dare talk to me about faces right nowβ"
"I'd do it again," he said, eyes already starting to lose their focus, "every time, exactly the same, I just want you to know that, in case I don't get toβ"
"You're not finishing that sentence."
He smiled anyway, small and lopsided, teeth perfectly, infuriatingly straight even now, and his eyes slid shut.
You didn't remember deciding to cry. You only remembered the tears coming, hot and helpless, one falling from your cheek straight onto the wound at his sideβand the low, golden hum that followed, faint but unmistakable, the last living echo of magic that had never fully left you even with the hair gone, because it had never really lived in the hair at all. It had always been in you.
The wound closed. Color came back into his face all at once, like a held breath finally released, and his eyes opened, blinking up at you in dazed, disbelieving confusion.
"You're supposed to be dead," you told him, half laughing, half sobbing, hands still shaking as you cradled his face.
"Rude," he said, voice cracked but unmistakably, wonderfully himself, "extremely rude, waking a man up just to insult himβ"
You didn't let him finish that sentence.
You kissed him before you'd fully decided to, both hands still fisted in the collar of his shirt where you'd been holding him together only seconds before, and it wasn't gentle β you didn't have gentle left in you, not after watching the color drain out of his face, not after the terrible, endless second where you'd genuinely believed you were about to lose him on a cliff road with the sea crashing below and no way left to fix it. It was too much all at once, everything you hadn't let yourself say out loud over four impossible days crashing out through your mouth against his instead β the fear, still shaking through your hands where they'd found his jaw; the relief, hot and overwhelming, closing your throat; the something else underneath both of those that you'd been carefully not naming since the moment he tumbled through your window and hadn't stopped, apparently, not even once, not even now.
Martin made a low, startled sound against your mouth β surprise, mostly, and then something that wasn't surprise at all β and his hand came up to cradle the back of your head, careful even now, even freshly healed and half out of his mind with everything that had just happened, fingers threading into what was left of your hair like he needed the proof of it, needed to know you were real and warm and still here under his hands. You felt him breathe out, shaky, against you, felt the last of the tension bleed out of his shoulders the way it never quite had, not fully, not once in the entire time you'd known him.
"You scared me," you said, when you finally, barely, pulled back far enough to speak, forehead pressed to his, both of you still breathing like you'd run the whole cliff road twice over. "YouΒ scaredΒ me, don't you dare ever do that againβ"
"No promises," he murmured, and you could feel him smiling against your mouth, that same infuriating, undimmed confidence creeping back in even now, even bloodied, even seconds from death and back again. "Apparently I throw myself in front of knives for you now. New personality trait. Very inconvenient."
"Martin."
"I mean it, though." His thumb traced along your jaw, slow, and when you met his eyes there was nothing left of the joke in them at all, just something steady and stripped bare, more honest than anything he'd let you see across four days of careful, practiced charm. "I'd do it again. Every single time, exactly the same, no hesitation, and I need you to actually hear that, not just β not just as something I say to be dramatic on a cliff. I mean it."
"I heard you the first time. Right before you nearly died proving it."
"Poor timing, historically my specialty," he agreed, and kissed you again before you could argue, slower this time, both of you steadier now, no longer shaking quite so hard, just close and warm and unwilling, for a long moment, to be anything but exactly where you wereβhis hand still tangled in your hair, yours still fisted in his ruined, blood-stained shirt, the whole world narrowed down to the small distance between your mouths and the specific, dizzying fact that he was alive to kiss you back.
Somewhere nearby, Kono shrieked with pure, unrestrained delight, launching himself in a small iridescent blur to land on Martin's shoulder and chirp something that sounded, for the first time in their entire acquaintance, like approval rather than threat.
Woojoo, standing a few respectful paces off, huffed out a long breath through his nose and, for once in his entire life, looked almost pleased about something Martin had doneβears forward, head tossed once as if in reluctant, grudging blessing, the closest thing to a truce he'd ever offered.
You laughed, breathless and wet-eyed, breaking the kiss just far enough to rest your forehead against his again. "Even Kono's happy. Do you understand how significant that is? He's never once been happy about you."
"I earned it," Martin said, hoarse, still smiling like he couldn't quite stop. "Nearly dying for you apparently buys a man some goodwill, even from a judgmental little dragon who's hated me since the moment I fell through a window."
"Don't get used to it."
"Too late," he said, and pulled you back in before you could answer, no urgency left in it now, just something slow and certain and entirely unhurried, the two of you kissing on a cliff road at dawn like you had all the time in the world left to spend exactly like this.
The palace gates opened at dawn to a girl with short, plain, ordinary hair and a face the king recognized, the moment he saw it. With a certainty that needed no proof at allβsome things a parent simply knows, in the body, before the mind has caught up to explaining why.
The queen reached you first, running down the palace steps in a way queens were certainly not supposed to run, and you didn't need eighteen years of stolen memory to understand, the instant her arms closed around you, exactly what you'd been missing every single night you'd watched those lanterns from too far away.
There was a great deal to explain, afterβa kingdom's worth of grief to untangle. A name to relearn that had been yours all along, a wanted man's record to quietly, thoroughly clear, which the king accomplished within the hour with the particular efficiency of a father who had just gotten his daughter back and had no patience left for bureaucratic nonsense.
Martin stood through most of it looking deeply, uncharacteristically nervous, hands shoved in his pockets, until the king finally turned to him and said, simply, "You brought her home," and something in Martin's whole posture eased for what looked like the first time in his entire life.
Kono took up permanent residence on the windowsill of your new rooms, deeply unimpressed by the palace's excessive number of servants and considerably more impressed by the quality of the kitchen scraps. Woojoo was given, over Martin's strenuous objections, an official post as a royal guard's mount, a position he apparently found so satisfying that his campaign of vengeful boot-stepping slowed, within a few months, to something almost like fondness.
Namjoon and the rest of the hanok's strange, loyal patrons were invited, formally, to the palace for the next year's lantern festival, and caused, by every account, an enormous and thoroughly enjoyable scandal.
And every year after that, on the anniversary of the night a stranger fell through a tower window and a girl hit him with a singing bowl, the two of you took a small boat out onto the harbor when the lanterns rose. They were gold and endless, filling the sky the way they always hadβexcept now, for the first time in either of your lives, you watched them from exactly where you were always meant to be.
"Happy anniversary, my gongju," Martin said, every single year, and every single year, you believed him a little more.
if she's here
it's crystal clear
i'm where i'm meant to go
pairing. flynn rider ! martin / f ! rapunzel reader
warnings + info. oneshot, fantasy au, tangled retelling, strangers to lovers, not exactly parallel to the movie so don't be confused if some things are different, kissing, violence, imagine messyhaired!tin ok?
synopsis. a handsome thief hiding from his crimes picks the wrong tower to climb into, and the girl locked inside it has been waiting her whole life for an excuse to leave.
teaser wc. 2.1k
overall wc. 17.5k
estimated release date. 8.2.26
perm taglist. here or reply to this post
maddy's note. i marinated on this idea for ages and finally it has come to fruition so i cannot wait for u guys to read it π! ik my martin girls are heavily deprived so this ones for u guys hehehe but especially for meri @griinspire and pearl @marsgirltyshi and lili @chocom0ka (and seulbi but she's Gone off blr) because no one does martins gf like they do ππ!!!
ok actually iβm tagging 90% of Core15 bc they yell at me @kaikaikoi @hyuneskkami @hollyoongs @aerinettes
Once upon a time, in a kingdom nestled between green mountains and a sea the color of jade, there was born a princess.
Of course, like any other fairytale, she was not born ordinary. On the night before her birth, a single drop of moonlight was said to have fallen from the sky and rooted itself into the earth, blooming into a flower that glowed gold from root to petal. The palace healers, desperate to save the queen who lay dying in childbed, ground the flower into a tea and poured it past her lips, and by morning the queen lived, and by evening the princess was born with a single lock of hair that shone like sunlight caught in silk.
The kingdom rang bells for three days. The king wept. The people lit lanterns and floated them on the river in thanks to whatever gods had seen fit to spare their queen and gift them a princess who glowed.
But the flower's magic had not vanished when it was boiled into tea. It had simply movedβinto the girl. Into her hair, which did not merely shine but healed, which did not merely glow but sang low and golden when the right words were spoken over it, undoing wounds, softening age, drawing sickness out of the body like poison from a wound.
There was a woman in the kingdomβnever young, never quite old, a woman the years seemed to slide off of like water off stoneβwho had known about the flower long before the healers ever found it. She had kept it hidden for a hundred years, using its magic to keep herself exactly as she wished to remain. When it was taken from her and given to a queen and consumed by a birth she had no part of, something in her curdled.
She was called, by then, only Mother.
She came for the princess on a night when the moon was new and the palace slept heavy with relief. She did not take the flower. She took the girl instead, because the girl was the flower now, and she carried her from the palace in the dark and up into the mountains, to a tower with no door, only a single window round as an eye, hidden behind a curtain of waterfall and stone.
She raised the princess as her own. She told her that the world outside was full of people who would tear her apart for the power in her hair, that the tower was the only place she would ever be safe, that Mother's loveβsharp-edged and conditional and always, always followed by but you know I only want what's best for youβwas the only love the girl would ever need.
The king and queen sent lanterns into the sky every year on their daughter's birthday, thousands of them, gold as the flower that had saved the queen's life, in the small and stubborn hope that somewhere, somehow, their daughter would see them and know she was being waited for.
The girl in the tower saw them. Every year, from her window, she watched the far-off sky fill with floating light and never once knew they were for her.
She only knew that something in her chest ached every time the horizon lit up gold, and she never could explain why.
The king and queen never stopped hoping. Every year, when the lanterns had all burned low and drifted back down to the water, the queen would stand alone at the highest window of the palace a while longer than anyone else, watching the dark where the last of the light had gone, and the king would come find her there, and neither of them would say anything at all, because there was nothing left to say that eighteen years of the same silent vigil hadn't already said a hundred times over. They kept her room exactly as it had been. They never once let themselves call it a memorial, because a memorial was for something that was over, and they had never once let themselves believe it was over.
The kingdom, for its part, grew used to the grief the way kingdoms doβfolding it quietly into tradition, into the yearly ritual of light, into a story told to children at bedtime about a princess who might, one day, come home. Most had stopped truly expecting it. The lanterns kept rising anyway. Hope, it turned out, didn't require belief to keep going. It only required someone willing to light the wick one more time.
You had lived eighteen years in that tower, and in that time you had become, out of sheer boredom and stubbornness, extremely accomplished.
You could grind ink and paint mountains that looked like the ones you'd never climbed. You could play the gayageum until your fingers bled and then keep playing anyway. You'd taught yourself to read faster than Mother liked, to argue better than Mother liked, to want more than Mother liked, though you were careful never to let her see the wanting directly. You kept it folded small, tucked behind your ribs, brought out only at night with the shutters closed, when you traced the shapes of mountains you'd painted from imagination and wondered what they smelled like up close.
Kono did not approve of the wanting.
Kono was small, no longer than your forearm, built more like a lizard than the great serpentine dragons painted on temple ceilings, but for the two soft antler-like horns that curled back from his brow and the faint iridescent sheen to his scales that shifted blue to green to gold depending on how the light caught himβthe exact shifting, you'd always thought, of oil on water, or of a fish turning in a stream. He had a long tail he liked to wrap possessively around your wrist, small clawed feet that could grip silk without snagging it, and an expression, for a creature with no eyebrows, of near-constant and deeply personal disappointment in you.Β
He had been left on your windowsill as a hatchling the summer you turned nine, small and starving and furious about it, and had simply never left, and you had never really asked why a mountain temple's guardian creature had abandoned his post to live with a girl in a tower, and he had never told you.
He was, as far as you'd ever heard, meant to bring luck. You mostly found this funny.
"I'm just saying," you told him, that particular evening, standing at the window with your chin in your hands, watching the light change over the tree line, "that if I have to hear one more story about how the outside world is full of ruffians and cutthroats waiting specifically for me, I might actually go looking for the ruffians and cutthroats just to see if they're more interesting than staying here."
Kono made a small, unimpressed noise and flicked his tail against your neck.
"You're right, you're right. Bad plan." You sighed, and the sigh fogged faintly against the cool evening air. "But it's my birthday in three days, Kono. Eighteen years old, and I've never once stood in actual dirt. Do you know how insane that is?"
He blinked his round eyes at you, which you had long since learned to interpret as yes, obviously, I have been here the entire time, why are you telling me this like it's news.
You didn't get to finish making your case, because that was the exact moment something enormous and irritable and coated in mud came flying over the tree line, followed at some distance by two men on horseback who were shouting in a way that suggested this was not a friendly race.
You watched, chin still in your hands, as the fleeing shapeβa horse, you realized, a truly furious-looking horse with no riderβthundered off in one direction, and the men gave up the chase and doubled back toward the waterfall instead, toward the tower, toward the one place in this entire kingdom that was not supposed to be findable.
Kono went rigid against your shoulder.
You, if you were being fully honest with yourself, felt something in your chest that was not quite fear. It sat right alongside the fear, close enough to be mistaken for it, but it wasn't fear.
It was closer to finally.
His name, you would learnβthough not for several more extremely tense minutesβwas Martin Edwards, and he arrived through your window the way a cat arrives through a window: badly, loudly, and with absolutely no acknowledgment that he might be intruding.
He tumbled onto your floor in a graceless heap of limbs, dragging a satchel that clinked with something metal, and had approximately one and a half seconds to register that the tower he'd chosen at complete random to hide in was, in fact, occupied, before you brought the singing bowl down over his head with every ounce of strength eighteen years of restless boredom had built into your arms.
The bowl rang out, low and resonant, an actual musical note hanging in the air over the sound of him crumpling sideways into your dried-flower arrangement.
You stood over him, bowl still raised, breathing hard, and felt, for the first time in your entire life, genuinely and thoroughly alive.
He groaned. He was, you noted with some irritation, extremely tall even lying down, all long limbs folded wrong across your floor, and even unconscious his face had the specific, punchable quality of someone who had never once in his life doubted that he was the most charming person in any room he walked into.
Kono skittered down your arm to the floor and approached the stranger with the deep suspicion of a creature sizing up a rival. He sniffed once at Martin's outstretched hand, apparently found it lacking, and turned his back on it with as much dignity as a small dragon draped in mud-splattered iridescent scales could manage.
You dragged the intruderβwith considerable effort, and a truly staggering amount of complaining directed at Kono, who offered zero helpβinto your wardrobe, and shut the door, and sat down hard on your bed with your heart going like a struck drum.
Ruffians and cutthroats, you thought, a little hysterically. Right on schedule.
He woke up loud, which you supposed made sense, given everything else about him so far.
"βokay, okay, I'm awake, I'm awake, get theβ" He kicked the wardrobe door open with a force that sent your good winter coats sliding off their hooks and staggered out into the room with both hands raised, blinking against the lamplight, and then his eyes landed on you, standing across the room with the singing bowl held out in front of you like a shield, and something in his face actually, genuinely, lit up.
"Oh," he hummed. "Hello."
"Don't move," you said.
"I'm not moving." He did not stop moving. His eyes were doing a slow, assessing sweep of the roomβthe window, the wardrobe, you, the bowl, back to youβthat you didn't love the feeling of. "Nice place. Veryβcozy. Homey. Round. You don't get a lot of round rooms."
"I said don't move."
"I'm being extremely still." He took a single, deliberate step sideways, testing you, and you swung the bowl an inch closer to his skull, and he froze with both hands up again, and something that might have been the beginning of respect crossed his face. "Okay. Fair. Noted."
Up close, in better light, he was infuriatingly good-looking in a way you resented on principle. Tallβtaller than anyone had a right to be in a low-ceilinged tower room. This ruffian was blond in a country where you'd never once seen hair that color (not that youβd really seen any other existing humans). He had this odd and loose, careless confidence that suggested he'd never had to work particularly hard for anything, including, apparently, avoiding capture, since two very large men had chased him halfway across a mountain and he still looked more amused than afraid.
"Who are you," you snarled, "and how did you find this tower?"
"Martin Edwards." He said it like it should mean something to you. When your expression didn't change, an emotion flickered across his faceβannoyance, maybe, or the specific wound of a man whose name usually did land. "You've truly never heard of me."
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warnings + info. one shot, fluff, love at first sight (kono...), banter heavy, intoxication (alc), he down BAAAD, non-idol au, wedding setting
synopsis. truth is, keonho was just trying to get through the wedding without dying of boredom. james getting married at the ripe age of 20 was not on his list of group activities this year. turns out all it took was you and a bottle of champagne to keep him afloat.
wc. 6.7k
LISTEN TO... you by radiohead ... the perfect pair by beabadoobee ... nomad by clairo ... lovers rock by tv girl
maddy's note. thank you to my most creative child nana banana for the idea i love you π & here is keonana @bananagirl222 !! also TAOR is coming soon pls dont fret i just need a refresher okay bless all of you and ur patient souls π€πΌπΌ
ps. hi ivy this my ode to miyo #weloveyouteacup ππ«
Keonho thought that love probably worked the way songwriting did. You couldn't force it. The second you tried to make something fit before it was ready, it stopped sounding true, and you ended up with a song that technically rhymed and meant absolutely nothing.
He'd believed that since he was maybe sixteen, sitting on the floor of a practice room with a guitar he didn't know how to play yet, some half-finished melody looping in his head that he couldn't get to land no matter how hard he forced the chords underneath it.Β
It had taken him weeks to figure out that the problem wasn't the chords. The problem was that he was trying to write something before it existed yet.
He still believed it now, sitting in a pew in a chapel that smelled like candle wax and old wood and, faintly, the lavender someone had tucked into the flower arrangements. James was up at the altar in a suit that fit him a little too well, kissing a woman he'd known for eleven months, and the whole room had gone soft and anticipating the way church halls do at that exact moment, everyone leaning forward without meaning to.
He wasn't against the idea of a soulmate.
In fact, he was fully on board with the concept, actually, had been since he was a kid watching his parents slow dance around the kitchen to nothing. There was no music at all, just the two of them swaying because they felt like it.
He just thought a soulmate should get to exist for a while before you legally attached yourself to them in front of two hundred people and a priest who'd never met either of you before this week.Β
He had a rule about it. Nothing official, nothing he'd ever admitted out loud to the guys, but a rule nonetheless, something he'd built for himself the way you build any rule you actually intend to keep.
He wasn't getting married before twenty-four. Twenty-four felt like the age where a person finally figured out what specific kind of idiot they were, the age where you'd made enough mistakes to know your own patterns, could see them coming before they arrived. (It was also the closest thing to his birthday number.)
He'd never bothered explaining the logic to anyone because there wasn't much of one beyond that. It was a number he'd decided to trust as a teenager and never questioned since, the same way some people trusted a lucky pair of socks or refused to walk under ladders, superstition dressed up as strategy.
So he sat there in a chapel on some sprawling ranch property, in a suit that was already too warm for the weather, watching his bandmate promise forever to someone he'd met less than a year ago, feeling some sort of mix of happy-for-him and are-you-actually-out-of-your-mind that he figured most people felt at weddings they were too young to be standing up in as anything other than a witness.Β
And then he turned his head, just slightly, meaning to check on James's mom in the front row, who'd been crying since the doors opened. She dabbed at her eyes with a tissue his cousin kept handing her, because that felt like the kind of thing a good groomsman should notice and mention later, something to bring up at the reception.
That was the plan, anyway. Instead his eyes caught on you first, three rows back on the bride's side, in a pale yellow dress, laughing quietly at something the kid beside you had whispered, your hand coming up to cover your mouth like you were trying not to be the loud one during someone's vows and failing slightly anyway.
He completely lost the thread of whatever he'd been about to think about James's mom. He didn't look away fast enough.
You caught him looking. Just for a second, your eyes flicking up and landing right on his before he managed to arrange his face into something less obvious, something less like a man who'd just forgotten his own best friend was getting married four feet in front of him.
You didn't smile, not right away. You just held his gaze a moment longer than a stranger indifferent would, like you were deciding whether he was worth being annoyed at for staring, weighing it, and then you looked back toward the altar like nothing had happened, leaving him to sit there with his heart doing something stupid and immediate that he had absolutely no name for yet.
Keonho faced forward too, and thought, with an alarming amount of certainty, that he could get married today. Right now.Β
Nobody had warned him one of them would look like you did in a pew, laughing quietly at a kid's joke during someone else's vows like the whole ceremony was a secret only the two of you were in on.
He leaned toward Juhoon, who was standing beside him in full groomsman formation, hands folded. He was doing his best impression of a man taking this seriously, which was more than could be said for Keonho at the moment.
"Who is that?" he whispered.
Juhoon didn't even turn his head. "The cousin. Ivy's cousin."
"How do you know that?"
"Because I was listening when James went through the whole seating chart, and you were on your phone."
"I was talking to my mom."
"You were sobbing about your dog, dude."
"That's notβokay, fair, but I was also talking to my mom while it happened, so it still counts as listening. Technically."
Juhoon, mercifully, offered nothing else, mostly because the officiant had picked that exact moment to ask James if he took Ivy to be his lawfully wedded whatever, and James's voice cracked so badly on the word "always" that half the chapel made a collective sound like some kind of interactive audience. Someone's grandmother actually sniffled out loud, three pews back, loud enough to make a few people laugh through their own tears.
Keonho tried, genuinely, to focus on his best friend getting married. He really did.
But his eyes kept sliding three rows back, and every single time they did, you were doing something new. Adjusting the flower crown someone had clearly forced onto your head. Whispering to the kid again, some private joke passed back and forth. Catching him looking and this time not bothering to pretend you hadn't noticed, just raising an eyebrow at him like, are you gonna keep doing that the whole ceremony? He absolutely was.Β
He thought, watching you, that he was going to marry a stranger's cousin, and then, a second later, that this was genuinely psychotive behavior and he should probably get it together before the reception even started.
Of course, he thought about it anyway for the rest of the ceremony, all the way through the ring exchange and the unity candle and the part where James's little brother dropped the pillow with the rings on it and had to scramble under a pew to retrieve it, and Keonho did not feel even a little bit sorry about any of it.
Three hours earlier, in the room where the groomsmen were getting dressed, Seonghyeon had made an announcement to the whole room while doing up his cufflinks in the mirror, checking his own reflection from three different angles like the room owed him a fourth opinion. The room wasn't just the band, either.
James's actual family had spilled into it too somewhere around the second hour, an uncle helping with someone's tie because apparently nobody under thirty in that family knew how to tie a full Windsor, his younger cousin arguing with his mom about whether the boutonnieres matched the exact shade of the bridesmaids' dresses or just a shade close enough that nobody but her would notice, a cousin filming everything for some group chat back home, narrating in a whisper like he was covering a sporting event.
The whole space was loud in the way rooms get right before something important happens, everyone talking over everyone else. It was all nervous jitters with nowhere to go, cologne and hairspray thick enough in the air that Martin had opened a window twenty minutes in and gotten yelled at for letting the air inside.
"Calling it now," Seonghyeon had announced, loud enough to cut through all of it, still watching himself in the mirror. "Pretty bridesmaids are mine. Whoever gets there first."
"That's not how dibs works," Martin had muttered, not even looking up from his phone.
"Are you slow? It's exactly how dibs works."
"You can't call dibs on a person, you absolute caveman."
"Watch me."
Keonho hadn't looked up either, though for entirely different reasons than Martin, because Keonho had been fully losing it on the phone in the corner, back pressed against the wall like he needed the support, one hand gripping his hair, the other holding his phone so tight his knuckles had gone pale. H
e'd been entirely too consumed by his own personal crisis to register anything Seonghyeon was declaring war on across the room.
"He did WHAT," he'd hissed into the phone, loud enough that Jamesβ uncle, tying his own tie two feet away, had actually paused to look over.
"He peed on your Jordans," his mom had repeated, very calmly, like this was a completely normal Tuesday update and not a war crime committed against his sneaker collection. "The pink ones. I tried to catch him but he was alreadyβ"
"Mom. Mom. Those were limited edition. I saved for those. I waited in line for those."
"I know, baby, I'm sorry. He seemed very apologetic about it, if that helps."
"It does not help."
In the background he could hear Cookie panting happily, no remorse whatsoever, a dog fully at peace with his crimes, tags jingling against his collar as he presumably trotted around the kitchen looking for something else to ruin.
Keonho had demanded, with the seriousness of a man twice his age handling actual legal proceedings, that his mom hold the phone up to the dog's ear so he could hiss "you ruined my life" directly into the receiver. Cookie received this with total indifference, maybe even a happier bark, like the whole conversation was a game he was winning.
That was the entire reason he'd missed Seonghyeon's declaration of territory on the bridesmaids. He'd been too busy crashing out over a dog and a pair of shoes to register anything else happening around him, and he hadn't thought about it again until the ceremony ended and he was standing in a reception tent that smelled like hay and candle wax.
Scanning the crowd for no reason he could name yet, and he saw you across the room, and thought, with something close to actual panic, please tell me Seonghyeon didn't see her first.
The reception was outside, past the chapel, under a tent strung with lights someone had clearly spent an entire day getting perfectly even, the sort of lighting job that only happens when somebody's mother has strong feelings about symmetry.Β
Beyond the tent sat a barn converted into something with a dance floor and a bar, string lights wrapped around every visible beam. Past that, if you looked far enough into the dark, real stables with real horses shifting occasionally against their stalls, plus a small pen holding two pigs that James's future father-in-law apparently kept as pets, for reasons nobody had bothered explaining to any of the guests, least of all Keonho, who'd spent a solid five minutes earlier just staring at them like they might explain themselves eventually.
βKeonho, those are pigs. P-I-G-S.β
βMartin.β
βLikeβ¦ bacon. Oink oinkβ how do you still not knββ
βCan you shut up, I fucking know theyβre piββΒ
Keonho was in the midst of flicking Martin off when he saw the love of his life again. You.
He felt like some ripoff Joe Goldberg with the way he observed every single little thing you did. You, with your contagious smile and your silly way of trying to make someoneβs newborn baby laugh and your teaching your uncle how to dance Gangnam style. He was noticing things and he usually didnβt.
You'd taken the flower crown off at some point and it hung off your wrist like a bracelet now, and someone, a little cousin or a sibling, some kid with a marker and zero respect for personal space, had drawn what was either meant to be a horse or a deeply confused dog on the inside of your forearm, along with a few stars and something that could've been a heart or could've been a poorly attempted flower. You kept glancing down at it like you'd forgotten it was there, then remembered, then smiled a little to yourself. It was private in a way that made Keonho feel like he was watching something he wasn't quite supposed to see.
He couldn't stop watching you do it anyway. It was becoming a genuine problem.
"That's her," Martin announced, appearing at Keonho's elbow with two drinks and handing him one without asking, the ice already half melted from however long he'd been carrying it around looking for Keonho. "The one you keep staring at like she owes you rent money or some shit."
"I'm not staring."
"You've looked over there four times in the last minute. I counted."
"You counted my staring? Man, that's worse than the staring itself."
"I'm bored. James's busy being a married man now." Martin took a sip of his drink, watching Keonho over the rim of the glass with the patient, unbothered look of a man who had absolutely nothing better to do all night. "So who is she?"
"Ivy's cousin."
"You gonna talk to her, or keep doing that thing where you look and then look away too fast, like you got caught doing something illegal."
Seonghyeon chose that exact moment to walk over, tie already loosened, jacket somewhere else entirely. He looked far too pleased with himself for a boy who'd just spent forty minutes doing the electric slide with someone's grandmother and, from the state of his hair, possibly lost a bet along the way.
The second his eyes found you across the tent, something in Keonho's chest went instantly, embarrassingly territorial, even though he hadn't said a single word to you yet and you weren't a thing that could be claimed based on who'd noticed you first, regardless of whatever Seonghyeon had shouted into a mirror three hours ago.
"Oh," Seonghyeon crowed. "Called it."
"You didn't call anything. You said a general sentence about bridesmaids."
"I said pretty bridesmaids are mine, and she is, unquestionably, a pretty bridesmaid."
"She's not even a bridesmaid, she's family."
"Even better."
"Seonghyeon." Keonho set his drink down on the nearest table, having apparently decided, somewhere between one breath and the next, that he was doing this now, immediately, before he could talk himself out of it. "I'm gonna go say hi."
"Say hi from me too," Seonghyeon called after him, entirely too pleased with himself, and Keonho didn't even bother turning around to answer, just raised a middle finger over his shoulder as he walked off toward the buffet table, weaving between two of James's aunts who were deep in conversation about the flower arrangements.
He found you there, plate in hand, surveying the food like you were making a real decision instead of picking off a wedding spread, tilting your head slightly at the chafing dishes like one of them spoke to your soul. He came up beside you, grabbed a plate of his own, and did his best to sound casual, which took considerably more effort than it should have for someone who'd once performed in front of thousands of people without breaking a sweat.
"Bride or groom's side?" he asked.
You glanced over, clearly knowing that he already knew the answer, seeing as he'd been standing at the front of a chapel in a matching blazer less than an hour earlier. You raised your eyebrows in surprise.
"Bride," you offered slowly, playing along anyway. "You?"
"Groom. Guess that makes us enemies."
"Guess it does. I'll try not to take it personally."
"Appreciate the maturity." You scooped mac and cheese onto your plate before you even touched the salad, spooning a generous portion without any of the polite hesitation most people performed at weddings, and Keonho silently decided that was correct behavior and possibly a sign, though a sign of what he wasn't entirely sure yet.
"You're one of the guys in the band, right," you said, glancing at his lapel pin like it might confirm something. "Ivy mentioned it. Said James's marrying into some very funny, very loud family band situation."
"That's us. Very funny, very loud. Me, funniest to be specific.β He looked down at his own plate and realized, with some embarrassment, that it currently held three deviled eggs and nothing else, the rest of the buffet apparently forgotten the second he'd spotted you across the tent. βMy nameβs Keonho."
"Keonho," you repeated back at him, testing it, like you were trying the shape of it in your mouth. "Strong name for a guy currently holding a plate with three deviled eggs and nothing else on it."
"I was gonna get more. I got distracted."
"By the eggs?"
"By you, actually, but I didn't want to say that on our first conversation, so let's go with the eggs."
You laughed. To his surprise, it was a real one, loud enough that a couple people glanced over from the next table, and somewhere in his chest, a feeling like something tugged at his strings settled.
"Bold move for someone you met ten seconds ago," you told him.
"I have my moments."
"You have three deviled eggs."
"I can have moments and deviled eggs. Both things are allowed to be true at once," he offered, and you rolled your eyes, but you were still smiling when you turned back to the buffet, and he counted that as a win worth remembering.
Dinner was assigned seating, apparently, which nobody had bothered to tell Keonho, because he walked straight up to the table you'd sat down at, pulled out the chair across from you, and dropped into it like it belonged to him, setting his plate down with a finality that suggested the matter was already settled.
You looked up, fork halfway to your mouth. "What are you doing? We have assigned tables."
"I don't see anyone here."
"There's a card. Right there. With a name on it."
"I can't read."
"You're in a band. You write lyrics."
"I hum them. Very different skill set."
You stared at him for a second, clearly fighting a smile and losing badly, then reached over and flipped the little place card face-down without breaking eye contact, like you were making an executive decision and daring him to argue with it.
"There," you declared. "Now nobody can prove anything."
"See, this is why I sat here. I could tell you were a problem solver."
"I could tell you were a menace within thirty seconds of meeting you."
"That's the fastest anyone's ever figured me out. Impressive."
The conversation kept easy after that, drifting through the band, your job, a story about the last wedding you'd been a bridesmaid at where the groom's dog had eaten part of the cake before the reception even started and spent the rest of the night refusing to make eye contact with anyone, clearly aware of what he'd done. Keonho told you about the time James had tried to write a song entirely in falsetto to impress a girl in high school and ended up losing his voice for three days right before a talent show.Β
You told him about your job in a way that made it sound more interesting than you probably thought it was, and he found himself actually listening, asking follow-up questions he genuinely wanted the answers to instead of just waiting for his turn to talk again.
He found himself laughing more in the space of one dinner course than he usually did in a week, the laughing that made his cheeks hurt in a way he didn't mind at all, and by the time the toasts started, he'd stopped tracking how long you'd been talking, which felt weird in a way he wasn't ready to examine yet.
Keonho lost track of you somewhere around the first dance, pulled onto the floor for a photo James insisted on, then handed a shot by Seonghyeon that he hadn't asked for and drank anyway out of some misplaced sense of obligation, coughing slightly at the burn while Seonghyeon laughed at him. By the time he'd extracted himself from both, you weren't at the table anymore, your chair pushed in neatly like you'd meant to be gone a while.
He found you eventually outside the tent, past the string lights, near the edge of the property where it got dark enough to actually see stars. The phone pressed to your ear, free arm wrapped around yourself against the cold, your voice carrying just far enough for him to catch the tail end of something before he registered what he was hearing.
"βno, I know, but you said you'd be here," you were saying, voice tighter than it had been all night. "You were supposed to be my plus one, that was the whole point ofβno. No, I'm not doing this right now, I'm at a wedding."
Keonho slowed, unsure whether to turn back or risk making it worse by staying, but you'd already snapped, "Whatever. Forget it. Have a good fucking night," and hung up before whoever was on the other end could respond, standing there for a second with the phone still pressed to your ear like you were bracing for it to ring again anyway, your shoulders drawn up around your ears.
He cleared his throat quietly, enough to give you a second before he actually approached. "You good?" he asked, and you turned, and for a moment there was something in your face you were trying to smooth over before he could catch it clearly, but you weren't fast enough.
"Fine," you murmured. "Just a whole thing. Doesn't matter."
He didn't push. He'd learned a long time ago that pushing rarely helped and mostly just taught people to hide better next time, so instead he reached behind his back, having had the foresight somewhere around the third toast to swipe a bottle off the drinks table and stash it near the stables for later, telling himself at the time it was for the guys, for some after-party moment that hadn't materialized yet and, he suspected now, had never really been the plan at all.
"Pretty sure you need this more than I do," he offered, holding it out.
"Where the hell did you even get that?"
"Stole it. Don't tell James's father-in-law."
"You stole a bottle of champagne from a wedding."
"It was gonna be for the guys, but honestly, they've had enough tonight. This feels like a better use of it."
You studied him for a second, deciding whether to let the moment be lighter than it currently was, and something in your shoulders finally dropped as you took the bottle from him, your fingers brushing his for just a second longer than necessary.
"Fine," you muttered. "But you're drinking it with me. I'm not doing this alone in a field like an alcoholic loner."
"That's the least alcoholic loner way I've ever heard someone describe drinking stolen champagne in a field."
"Low bar," you shot back, and led the way toward the stables without waiting to see if he'd follow, which he did, immediately, without a second of hesitation, matching his stride to yours in the dark.
You ended up on an overturned crate near the stables, close enough to hear the horses shifting around inside, the occasional soft huff of breath through their noses, close enough that you had to sit with your shoulders pressed together to both fit, which neither of you mentioned or moved to fix. Passing the bottle back and forth since neither of you had bothered finding glasses, your hand found his every time without either of you really looking, fingers grazing over fingers in the handoff, lingering a half second longer each time like the two of you were testing how long you could get away with it.Β
The reception noise carried faintly behind you, string lights and laughter and someone's aunt winning an argument about karaoke, but out here it was quieter, just the two of you, a couple of horses, and the occasional deeply unbothered grunt from the pigs somewhere off to the left, entirely unconcerned with anyone's romantic evening.
The bottle emptied slowly between you, and somewhere around the halfway mark, both of you a little looser than you'd been an hour ago, your filters worn thin enough to say things you might not have said sober, the conversation turned real without either of you quite deciding to let it.
"Can I say something and you not repeat it to anyone?" you burped, lowering your voice even though there was nobody around to hear it but the horses.
"Depends what it is."
"This whole thing is freaking insane. Like, rubber room full of rats insane." You gestured with the bottle, a loose sweep that took in the tent, the lights, the whole glowing shape of the property behind you, and nearly lost your grip on it entirely, which set off a fit of giggling that took you a solid few seconds to recover from.
"She's twenty-one, Keonho. Twenty-one. I love her, she's my favorite cousin, we grew up two houses apart, I've known her my whole life, but she's known him less than a year and she's up there in a dress that costs more than my car, promising forever to a guy she met at a coffee shop."
"They met at a soundcheck, actually, but I take your point."
"Even worse. That's not romantic, that's like the workplace."
He laughed at that, properly, loud enough that one of the horses shifted at the sound, a hoof scraping against the stall floor, and you laughed too, harder than the joke probably deserved, leaning sideways into his shoulder like you needed somewhere to put the laughter.
He didn't move away. He watched you instead, the way your whole face changed when you actually meant a laugh instead of just being polite, the little crease that showed up near your eyes, the way you had to press your lips together afterward to stop yourself from starting all over again, and he thought, not for the first time tonight, that he could probably watch you do that for hours and not get bored of it.
"Okay, I'm with you. I've thought the exact same thing since he told me he was proposing. I sat him down, I was like, brother, are you sure, and he looked at me like I'd insulted his entire existence."
"Did it work? Clearly not, given the whole," you gestured again, vaguer this time, the champagne clearly starting to catch up with your coordination, "situation."
"Didn't work at all. He said when you know, you know."
"That's not an answer, that's a bumper sticker."
"That's exactly what I told him. He didn't appreciate it."
"I love her, I do," you went on, tipping your head back against the stable wall, staring up at whatever stars were visible past the string lights, your knee coming to rest against his without either of you commenting on it, "but I've been sitting here all night doing math in my head. Like, is this actually going to last, are they gonna make it to twenty-five without one of them having some kind of quarter-life crisis about everything they gave up so young, the whole life they didn't get to have because they signed up for this one at twenty-one."
Keonho considered that for a second, turning the bottle in his hands, watching the last of the liquid catch the light from the tent behind you. Then he watched you instead, the way the same light caught the side of your face and made you look softer than you probably felt, all that champagne warmth still sitting in your cheeks. It was not adorable. Definitely not.
"To be honest? No idea. Genuinely no idea. But I've decided I'm not allowed to get married before twenty-four, so at least I'll never end up in this exact situation myself."
"Why twenty-four specifically?"
"No real reason. I decided it a long time ago and never had a good enough reason to change my mind since."
"That's either the most mature thing you've said all night or the least mature. I genuinely can't tell which."
"Probably both," he admitted, and then, quieter, almost to himself, something else nearly slipped out with it, something that felt too big and too soon to actually say out loud, and he caught it just in time. "Never mind."
"What?"
"Nothing. I almost said something corny."
"Now you have to say it." You nudged him with your shoulder, insistent, your whole body tipping into the nudge with more force than you probably meant, another giggle escaping before you could stop it.
"Absolutely not. It's gone. Lost to the void."
You narrowed your eyes at him, clearly filing that away to bring up later, and he made a mental note that he'd have to be more careful around you, because you were already better at reading him than he'd expected anyone to be after one bottle of stolen champagne.
"For what my opinion's worth," you said instead, letting him off the hook for now, "I don't think James is a bad guy at all. I just think twenty-one is young to sign your whole life away to anyone, even a good one, even someone you're sure about."
"Yep. Agreed. Completely agreed. He's my best friend and I'd take a bullet for him, but I also think he's out of his mind right now, and I'm allowed to think both those things at the same time."
"So what happens if it doesn't work out."
"Then I write the divorce album," Keonho said immediately, without a shred of hesitation, like he'd been waiting all night for someone to ask.
"You have not."
"I do. I've been planning it since he proposed. The second things go south, I step up, I take over lead songwriting duties, I turn his whole heartbreak into our best record yet. Every great band needs a devastating breakup album eventually. It's basically already written in my head. Itβs gonna be Radiohead inspired. You know how depressing that shit is."
"Oh my god, stop." You reached over and swatted his arm, then left your hand there afterward, resting just above his elbow like you'd forgotten to take it back, still laughing while you did it, which undercut the whole thing completely. "You cannot be planning your best friend's divorce album at his own wedding, that's genuinely deranged behavior."
"I'm not planning it! I'm just⦠prepared for it. There's a difference."
"There is not a difference."
"There's a small difference."
"You're a horrible person."
"I'm a realist. Someone has to think ahead while the rest of you are all busy crying like babies at the vows."
You hit him again, lighter this time, still laughing, your hand staying on his arm afterward instead of pulling back, and he decided he could get used to being hit like that on a semi-regular basis if it meant getting that exact laugh out of you every single time, and getting to feel your hand stay where it landed.
The conversation drifted looser after that, the way conversations do once two people have decided they like each other and stopped trying quite so hard to prove it. Your giggling came easier now, quicker to arrive and slower to fade, the two of you tipping toward each other more than either of you probably noticed.
"What's your sign," you asked out of nowhere, swirling what was left of the champagne in the bottle, your words starting to blur softly at their edges.
"Why does that matter?"
"It matters completely. It's basically the only real information about a person."
"Fine. Aquarius."
You made a small, considering sound, taking note without much commentary at first, taking another sip like the conversation might be over already, your eyes still on him over the top of the bottle in a way that made it hard for him to look anywhere else.
"That's it? No commentary?"
"I'm thinking."
"Think faster, you're killing me."
"Fine. It tracks. Slightly unpredictable, thinks he's smarter than everyone in the room, probably says something weird and then acts like he didn't say anything at all."
"That's oddly specific for someone who's known me two hours."
"I have a system," you offered. "What's yours?"
"Libra."
"Oh," he said, grinning slow, watching the way you sat up a little straighter, clearly proud of whatever was coming next. "That explains it."
"Explains what? You donβt know shit about astrology."
"Why you're so sure you're right about everything."
You gasped. "It's not being sure, Iβm just correct. It's a Libra thing. We're just morally superior." You said it with total seriousness, chin lifted, and then completely ruined the effect by dissolving into giggles halfway through the sentence, which made him laugh too, mostly at you rather than with you, though you didn't seem to mind the distinction.
"That's not a real astrological trait, you made that up."
"I didn't make it up, it's common knowledge."
"According to who?"
"According to me. I'm a very credible source."
"You're really not."
"I'm the most credible source at this table."
He looked around. "There's no table, we're on a crate."
"And I'm still winning."
"For the record," he said, "my birthday's on Valentine's Day."
You raised an eyebrow at him over the rim of the bottle, and he watched your mouth curve before the rest of your face caught up to it, that half-second where he could tell exactly what you were about to say before you said it. "Does that make you any more romantic than any other guy?"
"Statistically? Probably not."
"Then why'd you bring it up like it should impress me?"
"Habit. It usually gets a reaction. Why do you not care?"
"It got a reaction. The reaction is that I think it's a little sad you're leading with your birthday as a personality trait."
"Brutal." He made a pfft noise with his mouth and pressed his lips together. You were so honest. And perfect.
"I'm a Libra. We're balanced. Brutal and fair, at the same time."
"That's not what balanced means."
"It is if I say it is," you told him, with total conviction and zero evidence to back it up. He decided, watching you say it like it was simply a fact of the universe, your knee still pressed warm against his, your shoulder still tucked into the space beside him like it had always belonged there, that he might genuinely be in trouble here.
"You're not what I expected," you said eventually, once the champagne was nearly gone and the night had gone soft and slow around you both, the string lights blurring slightly at the edges of your vision the way they do after a few drinks, your head tipping toward his shoulder like it had gotten too heavy to hold up on its own.
"What'd you expect."
"I don't know. Guy in a band, more, like," you gestured vaguely, nearly tipping the bottle, "broody. Mysterious. Guitar-face energy."
"I can do guitar-face if you want it."
"Please don't."
"I have a whole face for it. Very attractive. Lots of squinting." He demonstrated, badly, and you laughed so hard you had to grab his arm to steady yourself, your fingers curling around his sleeve, and he stayed very still, very aware of exactly where your hand was and how little he wanted it to move.
"Stop, oh my god."
"I could write a whole song about this exact moment right now. Girl, stables, questionable champagne, pigs actively ruining the mood."
"The pigs aren't ruining the mood."
"They're really not helping it."
You laughed again, winding down into something softer, and he watched you do it, watched the way your smile stayed even after the laugh had faded. Keonho watched the small movement of you tucking a strand of hair behind your ear that had nothing to do with the wind, and thought, not for the first time that night but with more certainty than before, that he might be in real, actual trouble here, the trouble that didn't go away in the morning along with the champagne headache.
Back near the tent, Seonghyeon had clearly been watching for you both to return, because he intercepted you the second you stepped back into the light, arms crossed, grinning like he'd already decided how this story was going to go and just needed you both to catch up to it.
"There she is," he announced. "I was starting to think Keonho scared you off."
"He didn't scare me off," you giggled. "He stole champagne and made me sit near pigs."
"Sounds about right." Seonghyeon looked between the two of you, something a little too knowing in his face. "So, are we still doing the dibs thing, or?"
"There was never a dibs thing," Keonho said. "You made that up three hours ago and no one agreed with you."
"No one disagreed either. I stand by it."
"Well, now you've got no chance with her," Keonho offered, more confident than he had any real right to be.
"You don't know that," Seonghyeon shot back.
"Oh, I don't?" Keonho turned to you, eyebrow raised, already fairly sure of the answer. "You wanna go share a bottle of champagne with him instead?"
You looked between the two of them for a long, deliberately drawn-out second, clearly enjoying making them both wait for it.
"I already used up my one bottle of stolen champagne tonight," you said finally. "Budget's tight."
"See," Keonho gloated and stuck his tongue out at Seonghyeon. "No chance."
Seonghyeon threw up his hands like he'd been personally wronged and wandered off toward the bar, muttering something about betrayal that neither of you bothered chasing down.
"Well, thank you," you murmured, once he was gone, quieter now, the teasing edge from a moment ago softening into something more sincere, your hand finding his arm again like it had a habit of ending up there. "For the champagne. And for not asking about the phone call."
"You don't have to explain it if you don't want to."
"I know. I might, later. Just not tonight."
"Later works for me. I'm not going anywhere."
You looked at him for a second like you were deciding whether to believe that, then smiled. You bumped your shoulder against his as you both started walking back toward the tent, close enough that your arms brushed with every other step, your hand finding his without much fanfare, like it had already decided to be there before either of you agreed to it.Β
Holy shit.Β
Neither of you moved to close the last few inches. Neither of you moved away either.
"Aquarius," you said, testing it out loud, like you were still deciding what to do with the information, your thumb moving absently over the back of his hand.
"Libra," he said back. "The one who's infinitely better than everyone, apparently."
"Now you're getting it."
Keonho glanced at you as you walked, at the string lights catching the side of your face, at the flower crown still hooked around your wrist and the faded marker drawings underneath it, at the small, private smile you were wearing like it belonged to both of you now. He thought that twenty-four suddenly felt like a very long way off, and, for the first time since he'd made that rule up as a teenager with absolutely no evidence behind it, like it might genuinely be worth the wait.
is it a thing to write fanfiction about fanfiction (power play) thatβs a #muse right there πππ€§ this is what lifeβs about ππ€§ππππ i gaf so bad ππ€§πΉβΉοΈπ«
MARI PLEASE first a powerplay edit and now FANFICTION πππππ I GAF MORE πππππ THE SOCRATES MEME ts make me laugh every single time BUT i know how long i made everyone wait i had to Make it countβ¦. iβm so happy it satisfied u my Babyπππ
so late but winning a daesang is so #GREENGREEN πππππππππππ never ever color inside those damn lines especially without pinkies cortis WE IN THE MF BIG LEAGUESSSSS
i Sarang them so much ππ genujnely so emo been here through thick and thin when we only had the conceptual films and behind the mvs and since being supposedly called crayons βΉοΈ
eommmm π§ββοΈπ§ββοΈ lets get the next one too eommmmm π§ββοΈπ§ββοΈ happy anniversary π§ββοΈπ§π§π§
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what if i start going baxk to the 3pic collage bannersβ¦β¦. mama lovhyeon is getting lazyβ¦.. someone slap me πππππππ i suck at tumblr now
idk how i made it thru winter break posting at least 3 fics a week wtf
HELLOOOO I know ur busy with ur other works rn and im sooo excited for them but is it weird to say i miss so american ππ like i was listening to olivia rodrigos new album and like idk i kinda associate ur fic with her now and i was lowkey going thru the trenches bc her new album is soππ so i basically reread so american and Im like YEARNINNNNGGG FOR AN UPDATEE (plz donβt feel pressured). anyways i just wanted to say that cuz like idk i saw ur post ab cotl hyeon and I lowkey just got flashbacks to when i first stumbled across ur acc and yapyapgsp sorry im actually jsut making this note a yap session now. Um idk how to finish this but like yes thank u for coming back and i hope ur better than ever.ππ€
not weird at all honestly im getting so much more so american propaganda and yearn from ppl nowadays π π idk if its the air of me coming back from hiatus but NEVER STOP πππ it gives me life to know how much u guys love my og couple (HELLO U ASSOCIATE THE QUEEN OF TEENGIRL ANGST W ME π«ͺπ«ͺπ«ͺπ«ͺπ«ͺπ«ͺπ«ͺπ«ͺπ«ͺπ«ͺ)
i do lowk heavily get cringed by it whenever i see it but im foreevr grateful to what and who so american brought to me βΉοΈβΉοΈβΉοΈβΉοΈ i get sappy a lot but still cant believe a silly little fic associated w my love for a liv song made me get as big as i am now!!!!
UR SOOOO CUTE omfg Reminding me of cotl hyeon rn πΌπΌ our angel aegi stop he brought u to my account trust I LVOE SEEING MY OG READERS HAIIII im so glad u stumbled upon lovhyeon