bell

this is a second! --- main: @ask-mk-ultra-guineapig (please send asks to save me from the boredom) ; this blog is mostly made for writing and thougths. will remain CoD related, mostly Cold War. main intro post --- please read the rules and do not use my work to feed any type of ai . Warning: this blog might have nsfw or tws .

Never had Ghost dared to assume he had a saying in what the Task Force would've chosen for their own body, if things ever went south.

He had watched the end of many things. In his job and his personal life; a path blackened by the trail that Death left behind after she passed. He'd never let anyone see anything beyond what he'd wanted them to see; and if someone did catch a haunted look in his eyes, he was too busy to notice it or to care.

It was an unusual thing to see and observe, but Adler had made sure everyone in the safehouse knew he was busy; with an exception for Park, that had easily read the tone of his voice right before he entered the makeshift office, where another agent had been told to stay until he came back.

Adler had always liked lace. He'd never bothered to make it a secret, nor had he openly told Bell so. Due to the budget cuts and whatnot, he preferred to keep it simple and enjoy the way they merely struggled under him, stripped of it all but that fabbric hiding their mouth as he forced their neck still. In a way, and he'd never admit it, it was an even nicer look on them; bare and shivering in the german winter, only the face covered as it'd made harder to even catch that bit of air. Mask on, of course. All he needed was the look of fear in their eyes.

Not even if asked at gunpoint he'd say he felt more focused. It wasn't a lie, and not the complete truth of how much distinguishable it made Bell in front of him: a faceless human is no human, and what is not a human is easier to abuse, and less likely to fight back. He wasn't wrong in guessing that all that remained of them was a loyal dog; one that stood quiet and limped way too often. He could never admit what was between them any way.

i don't really think Bell likes Adler's 'Russian', if that's what you're asking. they probably did notice an accent on him and disliked it.

there's something weirdly personal about this, because i feel like the only reason that might justify them liking his Russian-sounding voice is Russian being Bell's first language (which is not necessarily canon) or it being the language they spoke when they were still with Perseus (canon, i think?). either way, Russian stirring up memories and being a connection to Bell's past life, when they were still healthy and where they wanted to be. some memories are just bound to make one feel at home, so i assume that Bell felt exactly that way when Adler spoke a language they used when they were free, not mentally fucked, and certainly not hunted by a miliard of hallucinations. (this mostly works in an AU where it's Bell native language, simply because there's a deeper connection in that).

then again, Bell remembers nearly nothing, so whatever. they most likely just brushed it off during the missions or tried to focus on something else instead.

Adler and Bell kissing at Duga, with Perseus watching it.

Or Adler and Perseus kissing at Duga, with Bell watching it.

Or Perseus and Bell kissing at Duga, with Adler watching it.

1 is definitely is the best, but 3 seems interesting too.

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Bell watching the blood seep out of the very God that built them, wanting nothing more than to spit and stick their tongue in his mouth just to make it a even harder to breathe. Bell sticking too fingers in his wounds. Bell moaning at their enemy's —Adler's— death chokes and grunts of pain. Bell forcing kisses. Bell making sure that Adler is still suffering enough for their pleasure. Bell crying in anger and taking it all out. Bell slapping Adler, one time on his scarred cheek, one time somewhere else. Let your imagination wander. Bell knowing their superior is getting off of their performance, so he tries to show off the best they've got. And maybe also Bell taking revenge by letting Adler live and bringing him along (?) either because they want to torture him or because now they're attached like a dog and can't let go like this, not without hurting him more.

I don't like AdPerseus swrry :( i mean unless it's probably too noncon to talk about it here

Bell does not enjoy the feeling of cold metal anywhere on them.

They do not enjoy it on their wrists or ankles, like it felt when the padding of the restraints failed in their duty of offering pseudo comfort.

They do not enjoy it on their chest, when a medic would check their heart briefly, just to give Adler the green light to torture them breathless once more.

They do not enjoy it when it pierces right through the skin; the 'only a pinch' that felt like a stab. Like being erased again, like existing partially or only for a short time.

And they do not enjoy it now; but it feels worth it. An heavy weight that fits their mouth perfectly when the barrel is shoved through the teeth, and the muzzle of the gun is hard on the roof of their mouth. Tears stream down from the sheer feeling of such an intrusion, violent in nature; it's their own finger on the trigger.

Their eyes shut tight.

"i'm slowly forgetting your face" but it's Adler reviewing Bell's old file as if there were any more details to find.

"i'm slowly forgetting your face" but it's Adler loosely holding a torn balaclava. there's three holes; one is between the eyes' and the fabric is still stiff from the blood.

"i'm slowly forgetting your face" but it's Adler looking at Case like he knows him. Sometimes the kid will stare into nothing and Adler will be vaguely reminded of another faceless agent. he ends up calling him another name

"i'm slowly forgetting your face" but it's Adler also forgetting Bell's voice and how it sounded when they cried.

"i'm slowly forgetting your face" but it's Adler dreaming of Bell after one too many drinks. all they are is a shadow now. it's more of a nightmare .

"i'm slowly forgetting your face" but it's Adler stressing over how things could've been, how much a little action such as pressing his index on a trigger could have spared him at least a good part of those nightmares, spared him this gap in his memories that he labeled as a more vulnerable part of Bell, their face.