LEG HAIR IS A DYKES BEST FRIEND

scientists are experimenting on cross-breeding a crab and a cheetah; things could go sideways real fast

puts my uncomfortably wet hand on your shoulder. see here, gay boy- can i call you gay boy?

med people are so annoying "This family's 8 year old child who was about to go through a major surgery and kept crying that she was hungry so they pitied her and gave her food, she then had a heart attack in the surgery. They're so stupid 😒" girl they didn't know that could happen or why it happens. it takes so little time to explain to them that will happen instead of telling them "no food" with no explanation 10 times

"Before surgery, your body’s reflexes that protect your airway are relaxed by anesthesia. If there’s food or liquid in your stomach, it will near certainly come back up and go into your lungs, which can cause choking, a severe lung / heart infection or even a heart attack. That’s called aspiration, and it is life-threatening. It's hard, but it's only a single day to prevent near certain death. Not eating or drinking beforehand massively lowers the risk and helps prevent these life threatening situations under anesthesia." <- TIP: patients have brains which allows them to receive information just like you

proud victim of the tumblr accent. it's fading out of public consciousness as the tik tok accent takes precedence; a linguistic evolution that makes the tumblr accent 85% funnier to unsuspecting civilians. it's like releasing a disease on a non-inoculated population. coughing baby versus hydrogen bomb.

fanfiction IS the funniest episode because salmon dean beef with a bunch of CHILDREN who are, at this point, like, HALF DEAN'S AGE about supernatural. like truly show of all time. grownass men who are killing monsters on the reg and are about to murder Death at the end of this season are intimidated by two 5'2" theater nerds who are probably queer. if that is not true representation of this stupid television show idk what IS.

50 cent was lowkey the most important man in my household growing up like it went 50 cent then jesus christ

i vividly remember my parents arguing once and my mom yelled “you’re not even half the man 50 is” then my dad slammed a door and left. these people raised me

Jesus had 5 wounds and 50 cent has 8. I know who suffered more for the sins of humanity

i’m pretty certain that’s the exact thing my mom said that got me formally asked not to come back to youth group on wednesdays

(girl who is listening to their own playlist) wow these are my favourite songs!

yknow its interesting how something can impact one demographic in a completely different way than everyone else. in the exorcist when the demon starts speaking in greek, to most people its creepy. but if youre greek and you suddenly start hearing the demon speak perfect fucking greek its genuinely the biggest scare of the movie. you just do not expect to ever hear your language in american movies so it catches you so badly off guard, it feels like the movie is talking directly to you

the first time my dad saw it, it was with his american friends. and when she started speaking greek he turned to one of them and was like "re malaka did you hear that in english?"

a concept: heavy rainfall when you’re tucked up in bed. like if u agree.