Rawb.

Guys I really messed up…I never thought I’d be the one to misgender someone :/

2. MY MAGIC METHOD. Car pulls up, I take longer to greet them if my bar baristas already have a lot of drinks. Full greeting might be like “It is a beautiful morning here at Starbucks, my name is Study, what delicious items can I get started for you today?” 10 seconds. Customer usually replies to friendly greeting with “oh, good morning!” or “Good morning, how are you Study?” These precious extra seconds mean other drinks are going out and my baristas are ready by the time the customer says “a large white mocha, please.” Maybe we are at second 20 at the time they start making the drink. I take my time to say “okay great [insert name if I know it], a venti white mocha for you today, very good choice. And you wanted the drink hot today, as well?” “Yes, please.” “Fantabulous, any food items or other drinks I can get started for you? [insert special promotion if there is one]” “Hmmmm….. no thanks, I think I’m good.” “Alrighty, so if that completes the order then it looks like your total is going to be $5.75 and I will see you ‘round that bend at the window, thank you so much!” “Thank you!” Customer NOW pulls forward. I just recorded myself speaking that entire conversation, wanna guess how long it took? You’re right, 30 seconds, then a few seconds for them to pull forward to the window. That customer is going to get to the window with the drink propped right in front of them and they are going to say “wow, you guys are so fast today!” There is no “wait” time. But no. I tricked them. We are no faster than any other day. You’ve been fooled. Deceived.

Larry, if we make an effort today, we might be able to save August. Jaws (1975) | dir. Steven Spielberg

With great power comes great responsibility

“moon.”

A visit from the ethics committee and an immediate withdrawl of your funding.