Snake Lad

basketball dracula isn't real dude he can't-- *sudden squeaking noises from the shadows*

*two pool toys having sex tumble by in the wind* oh thank god

*thunderous slam dunk noise*

The thing is you can have a grassy lawn or even a golf course without it being an ecological disaster, you just have to a: be cool about having the occasional non-grass plant in the mix and b: be willing to live in a climate that supports grass without irrigation.

Golf courses in California are an abomination which is why the sport was in fact invented in Scotland.

I always thought that golf as a sport should be adapted to the local native landscape. I think this will encourage regional pride when local golfers completely trounce visitors at Swamp Golf, Desert Golf, Forest Golf, etc. Rich tourists will be pressured to travel extensively to experience all forms of golf, instead of staying in their backyard country club golf courses. Internet discourse will probably somehow get worse but I think this is a small price to pay.

Twelve more golfers have been killed today during the ongoing Tsingy de Bemaraha Golf Invitational. Meanwhile, search and rescue efforts for the Polar Golf Expedition 2026 enter their fifth day.

please god let chatgpt die out like nfts did. With a fast and graceless fall into irrelevancy

Like to charge, reblog to cast.

This spell has a very low hit ratio, so we need a lot of us to do it.

i have [gestures vaguely] my tendencies

Your account was hacjed and the only way to get the password back is to give me your password olease

wait fuck that doesn't even make any sense

im so fucking sorry

Love how tumblr has its own folk stories. Yeah the God of Arepo we’ve all heard the story and we all still cry about it. Yeah that one about the woman locked up for centuries finally getting free. That one about the witch who would marry anyone who could get her house key from her cat and it’s revealed she IS the cat after the narrator befriends the cat.

I am in love with you /p

What about the one with the princess locked in a tower learning to become a wizard? That’s lived in my mind for years and I haven’t seen it in a long time

Oh, love that story, adding it to the list: 20. Princess Talia and adding a few more contenders 21. Thyme 22. The Monster under the Bed 23. A Meaningful Death 24. Humans are unstoppable…until they aren’t 25. The Monster under the Fridge 26. Antler Guy 27. Cleric slamming healing spells

Adding a few more I remembered:  28. The Frog and the Scorpion 29. HSTHETE 30. The First Witch in the World 31. Imagine that Oceans were replaced by Forests  32. A Faerie taking a Name  33. The Dragon on the Farm  34. Synovus & Menace  35. Raising the Anti-Christ  36. Aliens vs. Flora & Fauna of Earth (pretty sure there are even more additions to the original post but I had this one saved)  37. Doctors without Borders…in Space!  38. The Villain-Wrangler  39. The Last Contact  40. The 100 Parent-Point Children  41. And the Heavens Wept  42. The Night Gentleman  43. The Serpent God and their Priestess 

44. No One Showed Up for the Last Storytime

Wow! @writing-prompt-s contributing to like half of these!

I can hardly take any credit for these stories! But I love sharing them. Unfortunately I cannot read all the prompt responses so please tag me if you want me to reblog a story that resonated with you so I can give it a little boost :)

https://www.tumblr.com/writing-prompt-s/801359878631424000/this-story-was-based-off-my-actual-fruit-bowl?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/dycefic/765379102730567680/the-goddess-emerges-i-woke-up-feeling-groggy-and?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/dycefic/717539209992388608/the-hearthstone-god?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/steampoweredwerehog/805971216318038016?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/pocketseizure/806264791083663360?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/foone/806838541628981248?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/fipindustries/807007742445469696?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/inkskinned/767233885221322752/i-havent-been-back-to-ct-since-the-accident?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/ethanmaldridge/777405882642432000?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/theblackparadeisdead/809083543427956736?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/castledock/810698875994308608?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/insomniac-arrest/810922811149418496?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/writing-is-a-martial-art/811826902164815872?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/asteroidtroglodyte/812889526934601728/holy-shit?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/mircalla/815075725846708224?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/winterandwords/780329668558585856?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/asteroidtroglodyte/815948862969806848/ink-the-artist-rabbits-keep-reading?source=share

for the artfight theme reveal this year we’re deleting the entire site sayonara you weeaboo shits

kinda bullshit the English language doesn't have a discrete word for an unlit campfire. you light a campfire, but what is it before you light it? also a campfire, I guess. I need to invent a word that can be intuitively understood as "the arrangement of wood that is intended to become a campfire"

well "an arrangement of wood that is intended to become a campfire" sounds like it's just a bundle of sticks and I think there is a collective word for that maybe

Putting the term "Catholic guilt" on a high shelf where fandom can't reach it until everyone learns how to identify characters who are very very clearly coded as Protestant.

yay june, i can’t wait for pride events surrounded by cops and full of people who act like you’re the weird one for not wanting to be at an event that has more cops than a murder scene

I HATE COPS I HATE COPS I HATE COPS I HATE COPS I HATE COPS I HATE COPS I HATE COPS I HATE COPS