Did that cat just turn into a dog with a single button press?

witchcraft 

GIVE HIM THE ITEMS!!!!!

I CHOKED

so it’s national coming out day and i just wanted to say i’m coming out of my cage and I’ve been doing just fine and also i’m a lesbian

the other day at target i saw a dog collar on sale for $0.75 and i was like “sweet lets get it for barkimedes” and then my mom got all angry b/c “it’s too bright! it looks too girly! we have a boy dog” like can u stop forcing gender roles on my small dog. barkimedes does not care about the color of his collar.

you named your dog barkimedes

queen of getting thru it!!! even if I gotta cry along the way….bitch imma get through it!!!!

wtf she’s too cute

I walked to a deli and got a sandwich to go and a coffee and while I was waiting these two teenage girls ran up and were like OH MY GOD JESSICA HOW ARE YOU and then hugged me and the one whispered “that guy was following you and taking pictures of you” and then they walked home with me and that one guy stopped following me and hONESTLY THIS IS WHAT I AM HERE FOR