The Caramel Drizzle

Uh yeah! I’m down always. I probably won’t be any good so go easy on me? Oh my god right? Like mom totally killed the vibe, always made us come home early, yelled at me for biffing it on my skateboard, all that shit. I could do twenty-seven. It was a good year for me. I mean I practically am a rockstar at this point but I’ll pretend not to be when I’m around you.

Oh no, I can’t do that! You’ll never get any better if I don’t make you fight for it, yeah?! Wait, you rode a skateboard? I assumed you were cooler than me, but not by that much. Don’t hold back on my account, love, if you’re a rockstar and people see you with me, I might earn some cred by association! Plus, does that mean you get to skip the line ups at a club?

Yeah that’s totally true but when we got engaged there were fireworks, not for us, for mania but still. I just don’t know if it would have worked with our theme so it’s like a good thing we eloped right? I don’t mean five but still early. Like seven for warm up. I’d make it worth your while. Coffee and donuts after? It should be. I like to pretend it is and then just work extra hard to make sure my trainer doesn’t find out. You’re probably right but if it’s good food, it’s good food right? And anyone can appreciate good food.

Even more of a reason to keep the tradition going, now I’m disappointed you didn’t have fireworks and I wasn’t even there! Seven was still a touch early when I’m not working, but the coffee and donuts made up for it. My arms still feel a touch like jelly, but that’ll go away right? That’s my point though, yeah? We appreciate it because we know what not-so-great food tastes like - otherwise we might as well just eat everything in pill form for how much fun it’d be!

“I know, that’s why I couldn’t manage to get back to Bayview until now but the wish to come back was always there. I know, I’m so excited. She’s due in December and it’s a boy that I am already spoiling.”

If I was going to be an uncle (knock on wood), I think I’d want it to be a boy too, I feel like I’d worry so much more with a girl. That’s the best part of niblings, yeah? Getting to spoil them rotten and send ‘em home to mom and dad!

Well dads are intense but other than that it’s peaceful! But I suppose it’s more fun to sit in the pool and drink while he mumbles to himself. Video games are pretty fun too. I feel like I haven’t played any in forever. See? I’m telling you, the garage, lawn combo is a winner. Damn you’re right. Being a kid wasn’t terrible but it’s way more fun being adultish. We can be like middle twenties Peter Pans. After that we don’t grow up. Well damn… I hadn’t even thought to take it that far. Your mind is very dark.

If you ever get the urge to sit don and play some, let me know - I’ve got quite the collection and not enough hands on my own to play them all enough. It wasn’t terrible, no, but it did suck having to be home when your mum told you too, or having to take the rubbish out at the crack of dawn. Maybe we should be the opposite of The 27 Club, yeah? Just stay stuck at twenty seven and never, ever die. Rockstars shouldn’t get all the glory! We can be the Anti-27 Club!

Shhhh, Rahul! I only let my favorite people know that I’m a little bit crazy, and only if I think that they’re crazy in return, obviously. Totally, and that’s going to be the plan, is to just get away with whatever we want, whenever we want, and not have to worry anymore. Honestly… I have no clue. Maybe we need to find someone who has a truck and ask them what the appeal of having such a huge truck is? Although if they get super, super offended and act like a jerk, then we know it’s just a penis thing. Of course! I’m not just pretending, don’t worry. If I didn’t think they were funny, I wouldn’t laugh at you, so you’re good. You’re right, I’ve always heard people say that once you’re in a relationship, you stop trying and stop caring about some things, so I think friendships probably are in the same vein with that, right? Ohhh, good point! If not one like that, then something even cooler. Work! I’m doing a film over here. But I will definitely be back on Saturday to go along on the trip, I’m super excited!

I’m quite sure you just called me crazy, and usually, I’d be offended but somehow, when you say it like that, I’m eager to jump on the crazy train! That’s always been my dream - I always say if I could have any super power it’d be invisibility just so I could do exactly that. There’s no limits when no one can see you do it, yeah?! I’m sure if we hung around town somewhere for long enough, one of them would drive by and we could just wave them down and have a little q and a. See, I’d like to blame the penis but (spoiler alert) I have one of those and would be mortified to be seen in one of those trucks. Unless it was an actual monster truck...because those are kind of cool. Well then, Claire, love, I hate to break it to you, but you’ve got a warped sense of humor. Which, by the way, is a very attractive quality in a woman! Do you think that’s true? That we stop trying when we get into relationships? I can see it, but yet I don’t feel like I did in my last one and it still went horribly wrong somewhere along the way. Oh good, I was worried I’d have no one to spa with!

I think that is pretty much the right mentality. It’s really not as easy as that some of the times. I literally cannot do anything in Vancouver and not get noticed anymore. It’s pretty sad. At least, you’re managing though. I feel like no matter where I go outside of Bayview people are watching. If you ever want to send some of your obscurity my way it would be appreciated. I manage though. I think we all find ways to cope.

I’m not sure it’s ‘obscurity’, but thanks for that! Based on how many times I get mistaken for other brown actors, I think it might still be a bit of that old ‘they all look the same’. In this line of work, you have to find some way to cope or it’ll drive you mad - so good for you for not letting it take you there! I’m not sure I wasn’t mad to start with, so that might help me out a bit, yeah?! 

I think that’s a good idea, he’s had a really hard life and he doesn’t deserve more pain. How do you know Natalie Portman didn’t love you? Did you ever meet her and ask? I can’t say you weren’t cool for that though because I totally had breakdowns over The Backstreet Boys not knowing I existed, I bet Ryan cried a few times over not being loved, he was quite sensitive really. He just obviously did it when the cameras were’t around. Oooooh Keanu Reeves in Speed, yes but Keanu Reeves these days? Not so much. Guys as cat people are fine but if a woman likes cats, she’s weird and going to die alone - it’s such a double standard and not fair, so can you be weird and die alone to show it’s that way for men too? My brain is busy, I agree but it’s busy with the small things I should be forgetting to make space for the bigger things! You’re totally in my anti-oyster club now, I’ll send you a t-shirt.

I can’t argue with that, he deserves nothing but love and support. I have not met her, but she never called me back Sophia, so she either plays a really long game or she doesn’t know I exist. I’m betting on the latter! Yeah but when Ryan cried it was...cool? Also, I don’t blame you one bit for sobbing over the Backstreet Boys. If I hadn’t been so hung up on Natalie, they would have been next in line. I can still do you one better though - I, totally and seriously, had a crush on the Hanson brothers until my sister ever so kindly pointed out that they are, in fact, not girls. Have you seen John Wick, Sophia? The man still absolutely has it - and word is they’re doing a new Bill and Ted’s which I’m here for. See, I think dog people are a little weird in general - like you all get very, very passionate about your four-legged family members. I’m not even sure I love my mum that much! Oh, there’s a t-shirt? It comes in black, yeah?

It does, and you’re right, connections don’t mean you don’t have to do the work. They’re certainly not everything. And I like that perspective, Rahul. We’ve all been there at the beginning trying to carve something for ourselves in the business, you know? So I feel like it should be our first instinct to want to help the folks who need a lift and could benefit from it. Define risky behavior! If you mean drinking, then absolutely. I’m kidding, but I don’t know, I don’t really feel like I put myself in danger more often than not. I’m certainly not an adrenaline chaser or anything like that. And it is a thing! You hang a hot tub up in a really high place, like from a bridge or something, and then climb in and enjoy the view and the hot tub. And there you go, you’re on a well deserved break because filming a show for that many seasons certainly deserves one. I feel like she’ll understand at first, but you know mums, asking questions the more time that goes by. Actually, no…they hate closed doors. I read something that once said cats don’t approve of them because they can’t make sure that their humans aren’t doing something that puts the home in danger. Best thing is the crack the door and let them come and go as they please, lest you be woken up by loud cat cries or scratching. And technically, they don’t sleep with you, you sleep with them. I’m making them sound demanding, aren’t I? Welcome to the world of cat ownership. And yep, it’s indeed time! Though it won’t be out until next year, so maybe that will feel longer. And thank you! I’m hoping so because Andy definitely has some amazing stuff lined up. And you’re going to Comic Con too? Will definitely see you there, man. I am, fortunately! Excited to see what they’ll have to offer, too.

And most of us had someone who gave a shot, yeah? A director who hired an unknown or put in a good word for another part. Whatever the case, we usually had someone who helped out along the way and I think most of us remember who those people are. Oh no, pints would never make my risky list - I’m talking more bungee jumping, skydiving, those sorts of things (though not those specifically). I’m not either but speaking of chasing, the one thing I wouldn’t mind doing is tagging along with those mad storm chasers sometimes. Not because I want to risk my life, I just tend to find storms a bit beautiful...in a weird and slightly haunting sort of way. How do you get up into the hottub? If they airlift you, I might be in but if I have to climb, I’m out. Have you ever watched I’m A Celebrity? I’d be kicked off on the first episode, for sure. Thanks mate, say that a little louder so my mum can hear you back in London, yeah?! Is that so - so while a bit aloof, they’re little control freaks then? That’s kind of cute. I’ll just put a moat of water around my bed then, that ought to keep them away from sleeping Rahul! I have heard that they’re the bossier of the domesticated pets but I don’t mind. So long as I don’t have to pick up their pooh! We are, might be our last year, we’ll see if they still want us around after the show is done, but at least I get one more hurrah! I haven’t looked into it too much yet, but this is Bayview, so I imagine it will be jam packed with fun, if not interesting, things to do! 

You should contact them and see what they say. I am not sure if they would, but it doesn’t hurt to try.

I might just do that - and if they haven’t thought of the idea, I’ll copyright it so they have to pay me big money to use it!

Friends and family would often tell me that I work too much. That might be the case, but I love it. We just had the Summer Fest (shout out to any small business peeps that set up their booths or who I might’ve run into), Nate might get into preschool, and They See You starts in two weeks (check us out, we’re all cool people). Point is, I feel like I function more when I have more on my plate. My question to you Bayviewians is… do you enjoy having a nice break? Or do you prefer to have a busy schedule? 

They always say that if you’re doing what you love you’ll never work a day in your life, so maybe you’re just proof that it’s true, yeah?! Super excited to get going on the film with you, even if the travel back and forth between here and Vancouver might end up being the actual death of me! I do like my time off, I won’t lie, but too much time off and I start to get a wee bit panicky. Think that comes from being in this particular business though - the jobs can just stop coming at anytime and I’ve no idea what I’d do other than this!

It seems like it, at least in this business anyhow. I can speak to all artistic careers but it honestly wouldn’t surprise me much. But yeah, people who don’t have those connections tend to get shut out on opportunities, it seems like. Or they really have to go the extra mile to get themselves out there to make up for it. We all have to start somewhere, Rahul! Even Shakespeare had to become Shakespeare by plodding through a lot of bad writing, I’d imagine. What about roller coasters, though? I feel like I can get that same thrill without having to torture myself for two or however many hours, see. I’d never say never, but I’m not very inclined to jump out of a plane myself. I’d try extreme hot tubbing, maybe, but that’s about as far as I’d go. I hope they did learn something in this instance! God knows there’s plenty to take away from that film. I get that, always wanting to keep occupied with at least something, otherwise I’d end up driving myself insane too. And yeah, I think cats only seek out company when they’d like it, and other times, they’re just off doing their own thing. But if you happen to be sleeping when they want company, well, they’d probably wake you up. That’s a good way to do it, just staying open to everything and seeing what comes. You know I’d support the arcade journey though. Yeah, I’m actually getting ready to film It Chapter Two next week. It’s already started production, but I’m on a little later than everyone else. Plus I’ve got press for my new show coming up this summer, including Comic Con, so pretty busy days ahead! I can’t complain, though.

Neither can I, but it seems to be a common trend amongst those kinds of career choices so far as I can tell. We’ve all been there though, yeah? You have to make some connections somehow - even if you happen to know some people that doesn’t always mean you’ll get things handed to you either. I think what I’m trying to say is that it’s a rough business and so giving anyone who deserves a lift up a bit of a helping hand always appeals to me. Do you enjoy other risky behavior though? I feel as if it’s likely you’re a bit more adventurous than me in general. Though, if extreme hottubbing is a think, sign me the fuck up! I just feel bad if I’m not doing somthing, or have something on the go. At least if I can say I’m just on a wee break and not ‘I don’t have work’ I won’t get that not-so-subtle eye roll the next time me mum Skypes. I could just close my bedroom door at night though, right? That way they can find their own entertainment and  still get my beauty sleep - or is that like against the pet owner rules? Do you have to let them sleep with you? Shite, it’s already time to get to the follow-up, eh? I know it’s been awhile since the first came out, it just doesn’t feel like that long ago! Good luck though, mate, I’m sure you’ll nail it just as well as you did the first! I’m sure I’ll bump into you at Comic Con! Are you going to make it out for the summer trip this year?

You’re missing out. Gardening is actually super peaceful… well when your dad isn’t yelling at you for stepping on a flower that you thought was a weed. Yeah but the garage is only so big, it has to go somewhere. It starts with mowing and then they get bored so they take over the flowerbeds. The worst! Let’s go back to not being an adult. I think I’d like that better. We’ve got it. Well we will anyway. All the bling. Right? All the planning, making people think we’re up to something. It’s the only way to go right?

That doesn’t sound peaceful at all! I suppose I’m just more of a stay indoors and play video games to pass time kind of guys. That’s my idea of peace! That was the one good thing about it though, yeah, my dad was too fussy to let anyone else mow his lawn so I got out of that particular chore. I wish there was a happy medium we could just stay stuck in - I don’t really want to be a kid either, I kind of like the freedom. We’ve got to find that perfect balance of trouble between making people gasp and actually getting arrested.

Damn right. They were so good! I love fireworks. I wish I would have had some for my wedding but that’s kinda cheesy. Well just let me know, I’m usually in the gym most mornings so if you wanna join, you’re more than welcome to. Food is the best. I don’t understand why some of it is so bad for you. It’s not fair! Oh my god right? And like think of how many different things you’d be able to try! That would be amazing.

Seems to me a wedding is the one time you can get away with being cheesy and no one can say shite about it, you should have gone for it! If I manage to drag myself out of bed at a decent hour, I might come find you tomorrow - assuming by ‘morning’ you don’t mean something crazy like five am. In which case, I’ll be sleeping! Wouldn’t it be nice if all the good stuff was good for you, yeah? Guess we might not appreciate it as much if it was though.

“My speciality, talk a lot but still don’t say shit. But let me see, I went to Jordan, France, England, Australia, just got back from a vacation in Mexico and now I’m here. Besides all the events I went here in the U.S. Plus my sister is pregnant so she’s been all needy. That’s what I’ve been up to.”

See, you were quite the busy bird with lots to say, don’t hold back! That’s brilliant though, you’re going to be an aunt! That’ll keep you busy for quite some time, I’m sure. When is she due?

You’re right, especially because I want to get my name printed on mine and everything, like… stitched in gold stitches right in the back, so it’s very prominent and obvious and everyone knows I’m crazy. Oh, it’s totally attention-seeking! Like they need everyone on the block to know they have the biggest truck of all time and can make the loudest noises, I’ll neverunderstand it. I like your bad jokes much more, and like you said, you’re not waking anyone up in the dead of night with your insecurities, which immediately makes you cooler than any of them, anyway. There’s no way that we want our friends to think that we actually like them, that would be like… the definition of friendship and incredibly boring! It’s so much easier to let them believe that we hate them for one reason or another. Now I feel like I’m going to have to seriously research hats, since I’ve clearly been missing out on some good head fashion, damn it all. Oh! So, a retro visor with fitted beer holders? I’ll look into it, see what I can come up with. Saturday I am! I’m actually heading to China on Sunday, but I didn’t want to miss out completely.

They don’t already know you’re mad? I’m messing with you, but I like where you’re going with this - people tend to steer clear of the crazy ones, so we could basically get away with anything, couldn’t we? Question being, what does having the loudest truck prove? Some of these validations of manliness I can at least understand - not crying, means you’re tough, yeah? Makes sense. But what the hell does having a loud vehicle prove, other than you care what people think? I like my bad jokes better too and I appreciate that you indulge me and pretend they’re funny! I promise never to resort to deafening motor vehicles to compensate. Precisely - besides, I think the key to a healthy friendship is making them wonder. The second they know you like them, they just stop trying so why give in like that?! I bet you can find one of them in China! They have all kinds of wacky things - what are you in China for though? Are you coming back for the summer trip or do you have to opt out of this one?