rakinuna

Hira’s POV

In the middle of overwhelming activities as a university student and Noguchi-san’s assistant, at last I could participate in the event today. It was a stage play in a small theater which Kiyoi did as a hobby instead of jobs. In the theater’s website there wasn't either any news credited to Kiyoi’s name nor information on what day he performed. 

However, as his boyfriend I knew it. A boyfriend...

I always stumbled in this part. Kiyoi and I were boyfriends. My heart screamed whenever I questioned whether it was a good thing. While still feeling conflicted about it at the backstage door, there was a crowd of women coming from the other side. They had such a strong presence.They were TO.

There were a lot of fans following after celebrities. Among them, there were elite fans who reigned at the top. Even if they had different names depending on whether they were underground idols, Sonny’s (A pun for Johnny’s😂), actors,etc, but they were all hardcore fans who supported them by devoting their lives to their bias, and even sometimes managed fanclub business through the agency, and propagandized their bias activities widely. That was Top Otaku, or TO for short.

At the very front of Kiyoi Sou’s TO group who were walking, there was an infamous one among other fandoms, Pan-neesan (Sis Pan). She was about late 20s, and her name wasn’t because she liked bread (Pan) but because she threw a punch (Pan-chi) on a woman’s stomach and took her down since she purposely took the same train and took Kiyoi’s private photo secretly... Was sheTyson?

Taking the same train with bias, or staying at the same hotel with their bias when they had shooting at a far location and waiting for them at the lobby were strictly prohibited. Being moderate was important when following after their bias. Such a thing as taking a picture of their private life was already out of the question. 

At the line behind Pan-neesan there were Kanbu (the Executives). They were a behind-the-scenes working unit who organized Kiyoi’s private fanclub nationally whose popularity was on the rise. At the end of the line there were beautiful okini. Okini refers to fans who were liked by their bias but since Kiyoi was gay and not interested in women, they weren’t okini substantially. Well, you could regard them as haku (the beauties).

For me who was at the lowest tier of class and being stepped on when I was in high school, they were a group I didn’t want to get close to. However, since TO got close to the agency, they often would be informed of Kiyoi’s top secret activities’ schedule and wouldn’t shared it openly. When I tried to sneak into another corner, someone stopped me.

”Hey, you!”

When I looked back in fear, there were Kanbu folding their arms.

“W-W-W-Wh-What’s wrong?”

When I started to stutter, Kanbu frowned while feeling creeped out. The flashbacks of my elementary, junior, and high school reminded me again about those contempt stares which I had forgotten recently.

“We’d like to ask you something.”

“W-W-W-What is it?”

“We know that you are one of the senior fans, but where do you know about this information today? We didn’t share about Kiyoi’s performance outside his agency and among us. Since there has been an increasing number of fans who violate the rule by stalking him, martial law was set even among people who are with the theater this time.”

“B-But….Th-That…”

“Even though we seldom see you now, isn’t it strange that you could participate in such a top-secret event by chance? Where did you get the information? Or did you do something sneaky?

“No…I…I…I am Kiyoi’s friend.”

“But you don't seem to have any personal relationship with him though.”

You’re totally right. I also feel like that.

“If you are acquainted with him, then why do you stalk him?”

That was the same question if you ask why humans breathe.

“You know, you are called Fushin-kun (Mr. Suspicious) by his agency.”

I see. What an understandable nickname.

“You are totally suspicious with your hat, sunglasses, and mask which you always wear. We despise someone like you because people will think how lowly Kiyoi’s fans are.”

Such lowly Kiyoi’s fans?!  I missed that point. Oh my goodness. I made Kiyoi in trouble just by existing.  Then I should disappear. But not being able to pursue Kiyoi was the same as having my reason to live stolen.

“Say something.”

Suddenly their faces came close, making me step back. At that moment my bag fell and a lot of Kiyoi’s photos were thrown out which shocked TO.

“….Wait, what is it?”

I had recently been learning film photography. I was used to taking pictures with a digital camera like analog photography but actually film photography would be different when I compared them with the one I had taken. Depending on the developing techniques, the difference would be clearly noticed  even though what I had taken was the same. I could only think about Kiyoi if I wanted to develop new techniques by taking my most desirable photos and of course I had Kiyoi’s consent, but with this situation, they would look like candid photos.

“Oh, my, what an interesting sight to see.”

From behind Kanbu who lifted their eyes, Pan-neesan came out quietly. This was awful. She would throw a punch on my stomach. But even though my mouth would be covered in vomit, I couldn’t tell my relationship with Kiyoi.

“That’s as expected. Sorry to say, but you are forbidden to attend Kiyoi-kun’s events from now on. I’ll report it to his agency and you will be on their black list. Even if you get the event ticket, if you are sighted we’ll report the agency through our fanclub. You will return to being a fan who can only enjoy watching him on TV, magazines, or sites.”

My hope to live has been cut off, and I was falling on my knees. Of course I could meet Kiyoi when I went home. That would be me as his boyfriend. It was a bliss which was similar to a mortal sin. But not being able to meet Kiyoi Sou as an actor in real life ….

“Ah, Kiyoi-kun is coming!”

TO was getting so excited. When I lifted my face up, I could see Kiyoi walking into my way. The king aura which couldn’t be hidden under his casual clothes and sunglasses. Kiyoi would always keep shining in every time.

“Kiyoi-kun, thanks for your hard work.”

“Good luck for your stage play.”　

Kiyoi nodded his head to TO who greeted him and suddenly he stopped. He looked at me, who kneeled on the ground and was surrounded by TO.

“What is that?”

Responding to Kiyoi’s question, TO immediately started to expand their visibility.

“We are sorry to show you such an unpleasant thing. He’s the troublesome fan.”

“Troublesome?”

Kiyoi took off his sunglasses and squinted. He coldly looked down at me, who was kneeling down. His eyes, which looked at me like a pest, made my whole body shiver. With his standing out beauty, an insect like me wouldn’t be significant for his Kiyoi’s solitude beauty.

“What’s wrong, Kiyoi-kun?”

Kiyoi’s agency President and Manager came after him from behind. Whether it was private or business, they took a great care of Kiyoi, who would seem like their next profitable asset after Anna.

“Huh? Hira…..Fushin-kun?” Huh? What situation is this?”

They were surprised and looked at both Kiyoi and me. Ah…..I gave the agency trouble. Not to mention it was in front of Kiyoi’s precious stage play.

I have to kill myself.

——————

Kiyoi’s POV

When I was going to the dressing room to go to the stage which I hadn’t been to for a while, my boyfriend was kneeling down in front of the backstage door and surrounded by my fans. What was happening? What kind of situation was it?

“President, he’s taken candid photos. Please ban him right now.”

When we asked for proof, one of TO showed us the photos. They were photos taken by Hira at our home. When I stared down at Hira who was in silence and was about to ask him why it became like this, he narrowed his eyes as if he was dazzled. The hell being that carefree fascinated in this pinched situation, huh. Such an annoying creep.

With such a large amount of them, shouldn’t we report it to the police?

“But….isn’t it too early to do that?”

“Y-Yeah, he must have some kind of reasons behind it.”

President and Manager who had known that Hira was my boyfriend vaguely muttered.

“Why could you say it so carelessly? It’s obviously violating the rules.”

“Stalking has been a violation already, moreover taking candid photos!”

All TO got very angry, but the leader was waiting for the President to decide. Until  the decision had been finalized, commotion wasn’t necessary. That was right. As expected of the leader of top fans who has such an amazing personality.

“Yes, I know. Then...Pan-chan and boy over there, would you come in?”

She nodded, answering what the President asked her, taking Hira’s arm and making him stand. While TOs watching over, President, Manager, the woman, Hira, and I came in to the backstage door. While greeting people who passed by, the President came into the unused room.

“Pan-chan, it’s totally a misunderstanding.”

The President properly locked the door and came in front of her.

“What’s the meaning behind it ? There are a large amount of private photos but that man said he is Kiyoi-kun’s friend. Isn’t it too contradictory as a friend to be his senior fan and so obsessive like that?”

“Yes, he’s weird, right? We want to know the reason as well.”

The President and Manager agreed with her while nodding their heads several times. I wanted to know that too, but only this King of Annoying Creep himself knew the reason.

“Kiyoi-kun, is he really your friend?”

When she asked with a little hesitation, I squinted. “What?”

What friend? He is my man. We are a perfect couple who are in cohabitation now. 

But it was so painful to not be able to say it. When I looked closely at Hira, he seemed to have no clues either and just opened his eyes wide and stood still. What a creep.

“Kiyoi-kun, he is your friend, right? Right?” ,the President showed such a pressure aura to make me agree with him. However, why couldn’t I say that my boyfriend was my boyfriend? Just being a sexual minority and celebrity on a daily basis had already made me suffer enough.

“Well, to say more generally, I won’t deny that he is one kind of my friend.”

When I thought this was the limit I could say, she raised her eyebrows. She stared at me and cautiously turned her way to Hira who stood still and didn’t move an inch. Her face turned pale.

“No way…..You two….”

She then looked at the President. As a top leader of TO, she must have known that I was gay. She had selected TO’s bottom line, okini as a fake. Sometimes she let cute girls into the official guest seat to avoid trouble.

“No way…..Kiyoi-kun’s boyfriend should have been….more…”

Manager who saw her with a face turned pale, hurriedly held up her.

“Pan-chan, get a hold of yourself.”

“…B-But, why is Kiyoi-kun’s boyfriend s-someone like that….”

I understood so well the awfulness that her heart could break and made her in tears. I wondered to myself why I went out with someone like him. This was such a mystery. I actually felt irritated before but now after making my fan get so shocked made me feel guilty.

“Hey…”

When I called her out, she was surprised and looked up. Because of tears, her mascara got peeled off and made her look like Nancy Spungen. How pitiful. But everybody who was involved with him would meet misery without exception. Classmates who bullied him at high school, Noguchi who took interest in him, and me, his boyfriend. Be it evil or good people, unreasonably, a glass called “annoying creep” would hurt everything it touched. That was Hira.

“I am sorry for bringing you trouble, but please take care of it.”

After I said that, she opened her eyes wide as if her eyeballs were about to spill out. Her mouth flapped like a goldfish and she turned beet red up until her neck and let her tears spill slowly.

“I understood. We will be absolutely protecting your secret. From now on we’ll keep supporting you with all our might. As your fans, Kiyoi-kun’s happiness is our happiness as well. We will also be protecting your boyfriend…”

With her teary smile, she turned her way to Hira, and was at a loss for words. “K-Kiyoi-kun, we’ll get over any kind of penance for you.” She started to break in tears again and made me feel itch which couldn’t be worse than this. 

I felt like I’ve done awful thing at that moment, but nope…If he properly did it right, he was awfully cool, a model girl even flirted him when he made such a handsome appearance in a party where I made him accompany me, my president who had professional experience seeing through hidden talents in people even almost scouted him, moreover not only about his appearance, Noguchi Hiromi found his talent in photography and was so eagerly supporting him as a prospective creator in the future. But unfortunately he couldn’t. I knew better than anyone how creepy Hira was despite his own merit.

“Since it’s been resolved, Kiyoi-kun, let’s go to the dressing room now.”

President pushed my back, who was in a gloomy mood, and pushed Hira and TO’s back, who was in tears because knowing that her bias had the lowest boyfriend in history and said, “Well, Pan-neesan, please take care of this.” As expected of a person who had a long history of experiences with how rough the entertainment industry could be. Behind his gentleman appearance, the President was a demon.