You are made of stars.

reblog if you are BISEXUAL, SUPPORT BISEXUAL PEOPLE, or REALLY HATE DONALD TRUMP

when ur drunk any bathroom is a save point

i have no memory of posting this

OP died and respawned before they posted this

you know you're a 90s kid when your vaccinations were mandatory and no one in your class got measles

Vegetables are delicious, u guys just don’t know how to cook

Big facts.

So is tiktok like dark vine. Like vine died and we buried it in a cursed cemetery and it came back but something’s not quite right

They removed tumblr from the App Store we’re rogue lads

don’t forget the woman who charged a bunch of dudes money to attend an orgy but never promised any women would be there so they all just showed up to find nothing but men

The girl on Tinder whose profile said “send me $5 and see what happens” and after they sent her money she blocked them

The girl that got her friend’s boyfriend to order her a pizza and have it delivered to her house after she caught him cheating on her, then ratted him out as soon as she got her pizza 

one of my friends is a very pregnant dog and like 3 times a day i say to her “hello! you are full of several other smaller dogs!” and she wags her entire body at me like “it’s true!!! i contain multitudes”

i love that ur friend is the pregnant dog. what a nice friend to have.

ya she’s my buddy i love her!

update: there were five (5) smaller dogs inside my dog friend, but now they are all outside of her instead (!!) 

GREAT UPDATE NOW YOU HAVE SIX FRIENDS!!!

ya they’re my buddies i love them!!!!!

Every time you reblog this it makes a baby boomer vandaluse their own untouchable China cabinet in rage.

Honestly “thanks I hate it” is one of the funniest phrases in the English language

i one time told my italian professor “grazie lo detesto” and she lost her shit, so it’s not just english

The moon has known me all my life