I stumbled upon your post explaining the Ao3 fanfic thingy you wrote: I didn’t want to send this in because I’ve been following your system account for quite a long time but . You are bodily an adult, you’ve said it on one of your posts and I hate to say ‘I can’t remember what post it was’ but I tried looking for it again. Despite you claiming this to be a way to express your traumatic experiences I don’t understand why you chose to publish it? Especially seeing as it’s literally a rape fanfic and on your account you’ve posted smut, other readers could have taken this as actual non-con and very bad people could have gotten off to it. You had the choice to publish it and you did anyways. On a site known for gross things like that… Your arguments do not make sense to me and the specific point wording “Don’t like don’t read” is terminology proshippers and pedophiles have used to justify their interests. I know you probably won’t take this to heart but this really disappoints me. You trying to defend yourself when the OP anon was in the right was really disgusting to see and I felt nauseous seeing you of all people choosing to write something like that and choosing to post it…
I hope you heal or think about this and not just delete it from your asks
Hi! Thanks for sending in an ask! :)
I am not bodily an adult. I never have claimed to be, and I'm even open about still being in school. You may have seen that somewhere else. We have adult headmates, but they did not write that fic. I, Rainy, chose to write that fic myself, and I am not even an adult in headspace.
I chose to publish this story because plenty of people post vent fics on AO3 all the time, and I made it using characters from something. If you take offense to it, that's fine, but there's plenty of other stuff out there like it on AO3.
I understand where you're coming from, but I have no control over what other people do with my work. I can't stop people from doing what they will with my work, and my first thought when posting it was not to aim to please others. It feels like you are immediately sexualizing my genuine experience with being sexually assaulted. I posted it because it's a very important piece to my recovery, and I understand that it may make people uncomfortable but that is the reality of sexual assault. Sexual assault and Rape is always an uncomfortable topic, always will be. It not supposed to be nice, it's not supposed to romanticize it - it's about the experience I really and truly went through. That story is my own experience and you're incredibly insensitive for even thinking I wrote this and posted it with the thought in mind that people would get off to it. This is representation of what happened to me and it's appalling to me that people are against it simply because it is not a comfortable topic. It's not meant to be. And I even know people that that exact story has helped, with situations similar to mine.
I used the words "Don't like don't read" because I have had personal experiences with someone reading my story (The dining table incident), knowing exactly what they were getting into, and then claiming I made them read smut, when I made it very clear it was smut and he had every possibility to not read it. I understand that people often use those words to justify grotesque things, but they're words. They don't belong to just one community, and they don't explicitly mean something grotesque.
I never meant to come off as aggressive. I struggle heavily with my tone, especially on the internet.
This entire situation feels extremely invasive. You have immediately jumped to sexualizing my actual and real experience with being raped, and you should be ashamed of yourself.
