“is there anything so undoing as a daughter”

Having a job is an awesome way to stay hydrated because you get so bored you start drinking water just for a little excitement

you can post on tumblr even when you're trying to take a break from social media it literally doesn't count. it's like pepsi max, or pescatarianism

"just write the story you want to read!" they said. well, guess what, now i have 14 unfinished drafts because apparently, i want to read 14 different stories at once.

I know this sounds like the deranged ramblings of a senile old man but I swear it used to be possible to look up information on the internet

they’re doing one of those fun videos interviews with the communications intern. the guys walking through the tunnel before hitting the ice and drawing question from a cup the intern is holding. shane picks one and reads it out loud “if you could spend a day with anyone in the world, who would it be?” and he doesn’t even hesitate “i already do that” and the intern is like “wait what do you mean?” and shane gestures vaguely in ilya’s direction and ilya that was right behind him with troy and others centaurs, just open the biggest grin on his face and all the guys start groaning and booing cus they’re disgustingly in love and can never be normal about each other

There's a very funny thing that happens in transhuman science fiction where sometimes an author will turn out to be a reactionary conservative who thought he was writing dystopian fiction and intended all the sickass radical body modification stuff to be scary, but he assumed that was obvious and forgot to put it in the actual text.

It's like the literary version of those breathless propaganda thinkpieces where they accidentally make their political opponents sound cool as hell because they have no idea how it reads to anyone whose brain hasn't spent the last thirty years being pickled in fear juice.

Yuna showing Ilya photos of little baby Shane and they get to a photo of a naked two year old Shane grinning at the camera, shirt held up in his triumphant chubby fist. Yuna smiles and tells him how hard it was to keep clothes on Shane and that he’d rip them off whenever they weren’t looking. Without thinking Ilya says “so not much has changed, huh?” and then freezes because he can’t believe he just said that in front of his boyfriend’s mom until Yuna laughs so hard she spills her wine.

Shane at 45 years old, watching some punk-ass rookie on screen beat the All Stars speed record that he's held for over a decade now: Baby, do you think I can come out of retirement for next season?

i didn’t really have a horse in this race but if england wins tomorrow i’m actually going to. well. i shan’t say. do something drastic

16 year old Shane getting flustered from a chirp from a very attractive hockey player he’s facing off against . But then the guy misses a really easy goal & Shane gets the ick so bad it shoves him back into the closet for another year

so basically the five people who wanted to uphold his exile were in the right