One in a million

Superman: What made you decide to tell us now?

Batman: Flash found out last week, and I was positive he was not gonna be able to keep the secret much longer.

[flashback]

Flash: Bye, Batman!

Flash: I mean, not BI, but BYE——I mean, see ya! I mean, have fun only having sex with women! Just bangin’ girls left and right!

social media au > does Dick has big dick energy..??

Jason: [agressivelly holds Kyle’s hand]

Clark: Which one?

Jon: It started with B.

Here are some of the things that have happened at previous meetings.

- A boy stumbled in, wide-eyed and messy haired, poured himself a mug of coffee. He never noticed that he completely missed the mug. He announced loudly, “BRUCE you’re not gonna fuckin believe this” and started rambling out a theory. In response, Bruce closed his eyes, pinched the bridge of his nose, and just waited for a minute. 

- A tiny kid with a katana walked in followed by a cow. Bruce didn’t even look up. 

- A gangly kid came in with a gun strapped to one thigh and a round of throwing knives strapped to the other. He took a chair from the dining room and dragged it all the way into the kitchen. It screeched across the floor the entire time. The league watched silently. The boy stood up on the chair to look at the assorted bottles of alcohol on top of the fridge. He chose tequila, took the cork out, and drank it straight from the bottle. 

“It’s okay, I’m over 21.” He said. 

Bruce shook his head, “he’s not. just ignore him.” The boy poured the rest of the tequila into a water bottle and dragged the chair back across the floor. On his way out, he gave a mock salute and said, “later, pops.”

- a cop in his mid twenties came in and said, “Lil D asked me to brink turkey food? I couldn’t tell if he was joking or not so I bought some.”

Bruce, who had no idea whether or not there really was a turkey in his house, just soundlessly pointed him in the right direction.

- A girl walked in soundlessly and sat next to Bruce. She never said anything, just listened calmly and nodded every so often. This wasn’t a problem. Bruce loves his only daughter.

- another boy came in, wearing a yellow bat symbol on his chest. Wide eyed, he tapped bruce on the shoulder carefully and said, “Uh, I’m pretty sure we’re in the middle of an alien invasion. Is that… is that something you deal with, or do I… am I gonna have to… what do I -”

to celebrate the end of the hiatus I PRESENT… MY MAGNUM OPUS, Connie says the F word, i don’t know why i find that so amusing