Ur Mum

i am so comfortable with the pain and i do not know anything else. i never have.

when will it be my turn, i shout. who will love me for once instead?

how could you have made me so bitter?

the tenderness of love will never be. how i yearn for your touch.

i like to think that our hearts beat together. that they are one, beating in motion as they intertwine. and our souls do the same, consuming each other with love that is endless, even in death.

i sometimes reach over my shoulder and try to feel for you, the warmth that was once there. but now there is nothing. it is cold.

i am filled with warmth at the very thought of you. oh how your smile aids me in crisis.

i hope one day i will walk through the door and you will be there. standing in all your warmth, just as i remember.

sometimes you do what you’re supposed to and life still isn’t fair

i scratch at my skin. clawing and digging at flesh for something that is no longer there.