does anyone else constantly get the feeling that you’re running out of time?? and for no reason!! i could be lying in bed in the middle of summer vacation and my mind is like “hurry up!!! before it’s too late!!!” and i’m just like “hurry up and do what?? leave me alone wtf!!!”

What if it bites me and it dies?

that means you’re poisonous. jesus christ, nate, learn to read.

What if it bites itself and I die?

It’s voodoo.

What if it bites me and someone else dies?

That’s correlation, not causation.

what if we bite each other and neither of us die

that’s kinky

oh my god

this is still my favorite text post collaboration ever

“THAT’S RIGHT TWAS I that set the house ablaze!!!”

I’m in tears!

I just want to know how the writers of snl knew about my very specific sexual fantasy

for my entire life i wondered why a dragonfly has an ass thats like 8 times as long as their body and tonight i finally felt compelled to investigate and as it turns out dragonflies breath thru their ass and can shoot water out of their butt hole to make them fly faster…….so…… i really did not expect that to be the answer but there it is

it melt. :o

@fat-birds

An excellent birb blob, I approve

me: “that Pokemon looks cool” Some buttman: “sure, but it’s attack stat is shit and not to mention it’s ability makes it worthless. It’s move pool is so shallow, it can’t even learn good tms. Not to mention that it’s 4x weak to fire.” Me: “he go swoosh swoosh and its cute”