YO

she calls me one morning with her voice wobbling and we lie next to each other with our fingers tangling. we tell each other secrets and watch them hover in smoke rings, find shapes in them like clouds, say this one’s an elephant and that one’s a puppy and this one’s the quiet of forgiving. this is the two of us always touching, this is the steady heartbeat, settled breathing, comfortable kind of love. clean laundry kind of love. i come to her with blood on my knuckles and she holds my hand anyway. that kind of love.

she holds her breath when she paints her fingernails and i love her effortless, i love her breathless, i love her when she tries to parallel park and curses her way through it and i realize holy shit, i was put on this earth just to look at her.

i love her like i am a wanderer and she is my compass, like drowning and she’s a breath of air, like peanut butter and jelly, like lock and key, like there aren’t enough words to write with because they’re all just starting to look like her name rewritten. i tell her she’s my galaxy and stardust and soulmate and i say sorry because there are no new words, they’ve all been used before, but she says it’s okay because i make them sound new just by saying them in a different way.

her hair is wet against my shoulder and she twines her legs between mine and asks me what i think would happen if love just ended one day. there’s an eyelash on her cheek and mac and cheese on her chin and i tell her if love ended, we’d be the last ones standing.

and i want her. i want her like pajamas at the end of a long day, like plastic forks and paper plates, like i’ll feed the cat if you do the laundry. like we’re planning our wedding between the tampons and the toilet paper when she tells me she wants a honeymoon in hawaii and for us to do the dishes together every night.

you guys remember when PETA stole people pets off their porches and euthanized them?

you guys remember how it came out that PETA kills about 90% of the animals it takes in, including healthy and adoptable puppies and kittens, stating “ We could become a no-kill shelter immediately. It means we wouldn’t do as much work”?

you guys remember when PETA advocated killing all pit bulls for the crime of being pit bulls?

you guys remember when PETA handed out these comics to children when there were no adults looking?

you guys remember when they made a porn site and then filled it with videos of animal abuse, and (also in that link) claimed cats should be vegetarian?

you guys remember when PETA lied about sheep shearing, got caught, and defended the lie as true even after they admitted the sheep in their picture wasn’t even real?

you guys remember when they tried to excuse their horrifying ways by claiming that the person who exposed them was manipulating the facts by taking them and putting them in the wrong context?

Because I remember. I remember everything. 

PETA cares about money and publicity, its a corporation run by a psychopath who is afraid of pitts as it states in the link: she was apparently bit by one, and now she hates them. 

-spread false information about milk causing autism based on outdated bullshit information

-used holocaust imagery to compare the meat industry to concentration camps (no pictures)

-used a young man’s brutal death as a way to say “yeah that’s awful but it happens to animals every day and nobody cares about that” (tw: no pictures but the way the guy died is described and it is really horrible)

-dressed up in KKK robes and protested outside of the Westminister Dog Show to protest breeding/pure bred dogs (tw: racism)

-offered to pay the water bill for literally the poorest neighborhood in Detroit if and only if they all went vegan for a month (tw: self-righteous shitheads)

-and they definitely didn’t have two of their workers accept perfectly healthy animals from an animal hospital, with the implication that they would give them good homes, clarify that these animals were all healthy and well-tempered, and then euthanized them all in the back of a kill-van before dumping their dead bodies behind a grocery store (tw: PICTURES OF DEAD ANIMALS, animal death)

-and they totally didn’t get off pretty much scot-free for it because PETA has loads of money and lawyers to defend themselves, which coincidentally might be why the Cerate family hasn’t seen justice for their kidnapped and murdered dog, Maya. (tw: animal death)

Nah. PETA’s not that bad.

she just

he asked how old i was, and i lied and said i was 16. as a conversation starter, he asked if i had my license yet, and because i was 12, i said no.

so he starts giving me driving tips. get a junker as your first, because when you finally get a new car, you’ll be able to appreciate it.

stick shift is going out of fashion, and even if you learn how to drive that way and enjoy it, get an automatic. it’ll save your ass on nasty hills and in rush hour traffic.

and most importantly, never hold your hands at 10 and 2. go with 9 and 3. he’d always loved cars, and used to race when he was younger. became pretty well known in the indie circles. one day, he was speeding around the track and just came out of the curve when a girl in the crowd flashed her tits at him.

he was so distracted that he crashed straight into the barrier. due to how he was holding the wheel, he broke both of his arms. he still has a couple lingering issues.

i asked him if it was worth it, and he said yes. he’d do it again if he had the chance. they were the finest tiddies he’d ever seen.

No. You remove your child from the scene (because children are often reacting to overstimulation such as the grocery store is too loud, the room is too bright, there’s people they don’t know around, they’ve been there too long etc) and go somewhere quiet. You then sit with them as they cry, reassuring them that you are present, and once they have stopped crying you offer comfort and ask if they know what it is that they were so upset about. Then you calmly talk to them so they - and you - can understand and fix the problem that was the root of the tantrum.

Bad example;‘Why are you crying?’‘I’m hungry’‘Well we’re going home soon!’

Good example;‘Do you know why you were crying?’‘I’m hungry’ ‘We’re at the grocery store to get food. We only have three more aisles to go. We can count them down together. Then we’ll go home and we can eat.’

Children don’t understand ‘soon’; even for adults, ‘soon’ is a relative term. children understand things like ‘three aisles. Two. One. Now we’re going home!’

Children need communication, understanding and teaching. Not beating, intimidating or belittling.

Veggie Tales version: a king wants another man’s rubber duck

Bible version: threat of genocide

Veggie Tales version: threat of banishment to the island of perpetual tickling

Bible version: since they won’t bow down before an idol, the king has them burned alive

“Roger’s favourite game is crushing his feed bucket! Roger is our alpha male kangaroo, he is 10 years old, height 6ft 7, weight 200 pounds and 100% muscle. I raised him from a tiny orphan baby kangaroo.”