Prototype Ze

@onenicebugperday

I miss my leeches for all the normal pet reasons but I also miss being able to use them as a one-hit death blow to end stupid conversations. Whenever I defend the ecological importance of parasites someone will inevitably crawl up and go “well I bet you wouldn’t feel that way if you had them” and oooooo boy let me tell you. It was so fun to hit back with “I DO” and then whip out my phone and show them 30 pictures of my fucking Worms

What were your leeches named?? Please i need to know please please tell me about your leeches oh my god

Wormitha, Burrito, Chungus, Chocolate Chip and Squish Baby. I collectively called them The Squish Squad

Ezcuse me ladies everything you just said about wile e coyote being a cocksucking faggot and being passed around at college parties and sucking his husbands cock and cruising at home depot has been echoed and amplified out your open ground floor window to our leasing office where we are discussing not renew8ng your lease when its up and we all have heard everything you just said

by the way. it never is too late to decide you want to be happy. the woman who helped me get hormones didnt start hers until she was 70, and i met her at 73, beautiful and smiling - and told me that the last three years of her life had been her favorite. your favorites might be ahead of you too. why not hang around and find out?

feng shui sabotage by placing thousands of tiny ball bearings in a bag under your couch you won't see them but you'll feel the clutter