All Hail The Blue Dorito

If you’re trying to catch a housecat that’s gotten outside, don’t forget: they’re an ambush predator and you’re a persistence predator. You have several times more endurance than they do - use that to your advantage! Don’t run after them; that’s playing to the cat’s strengths, and vigorous pursuit may cause them to hide. Instead, follow them at a brisk walking pace until they get tired and need to have a lie-down, at which point you can simply pick them up and take them home.

Ok but no shit this tactic is what allowed humans to survive pre-civilisation

What you got made fun of in school for?

i went into american public school for 6th grade and i pierced someone’s scrotum with a fencing foil that was missing the little rubber safety tip on the end by accident in gym and it was middle school so i was promptly nicknamed “The Nut Slayer” and i cried until my parents let me move back to europe and live with my grandparents 

nutslayer is a powerful title

can you imagine a european person coming to your school for 1 year, stabbing you in the ball sac, then promptly fucking back off to europe immediately afterwards. can you imagine being the bloke with the stitch in their scrote because of some mysterious foreign spherepuncturer

What you got made fun of in school for?

i went into american public school for 6th grade and i pierced someone’s scrotum with a fencing foil that was missing the little rubber safety tip on the end by accident in gym and it was middle school so i was promptly nicknamed “The Nut Slayer” and i cried until my parents let me move back to europe and live with my grandparents 

nutslayer is a powerful title

can you imagine a european person coming to your school for 1 year, stabbing you in the ball sac, then promptly fucking back off to europe immediately afterwards. can you imagine being the bloke with the stitch in their scrote because of some mysterious foreign spherepuncturer

48 years ago a girl said “oh fuck me” to her best friend while walking in the street, a guy who randomly passed by answered by “let me at least buy you dinner first”. I present to you my grandparents, in love since then and celebrating their 47 years of marriage today.

grandpa got game

the umm summer