Live Every Week Like It's Shark Week

shout out to reality tv producers for being literally fucking geniuses at film theory

why does using someone’s name in conversation feel so intimate, like the way a touch feels gentle as someone is fixing ur hair or brushing out a stray strand

someone: *uses my name to address me* me: oh my God, i am a physical entity… …..

Tiddies

wait

Tiddies

This is the first time ive seen this meme used and it wasnt only in character but also literally sounds like actual dialogue from the series itd paired with

They’re…. They’re scene

Omfg

I’m in love

so are they

i’m back at my ancestral home (lowe’s) and I just watched a very burly man in a lot of flannel carry a potted orchid SO TENDERLY across the parking lot

A sentence that starts with “i’m back at my ancestral home (lowe’s)” has to work really hard to make the end of that sentence equally as amazing and by god you’ve done it

ur mom hands u a glass of orange juice. u take a sip. its not orange juice. its stirred egg yolks. u spit them all out. u ask ur mom why. she turns around. its not ur mom. its me. ur mom is gone. im ur mother now

these old spice commercials have been getting really crazy lately 

• you kneel before my throne unaware that it was built on lies

- take this gift, for the gods surely won’t

Violence for Violence is the Rule of Beasts