Sunshine

I hope your vibrator runs out of battery halfway through and that the charger is on the other side of the room. And also that you die

so embarrassing to like music. "yeah, these are all my favorite noises", "im gonna pay money to go to the room where they play this sound really loud", "im gonna 'buy' these noises so i can listen to them later". humiliating. literature isnt like this

ah yes iced coffee, the most important meal of the day

You know the word unalive is actually hilarious so it’s disappointing to me that people use it as self censorship instead of as a thing to say when you’re being unserious or lighthearted

“He got unalived” is peak internet slang but why are you using it in serious situations

That is so funny I haven’t heard that one

I love my friends they are very smart people but because they are people they sometimes miss things

Being the only person who doesn’t do drugs or regularly drink in a friend group of writers and artists sure is an experience let me tell you

basically the best thing a story can have is a woman who is doomed. massive points if she destroys the people around her in response.

stop tagging men on this post i'm going to kill us both

You listen to music regularly? Why? Have you even tried quitting? Could you quit? You get music stuck in your head? Wow. You're so ruined and music brained. I bet you make your partners listen to music with you when you have sex. Music addiction has really ruined a whole generation. You know it's not realistic to expect reverb in real life, right? You're probably so desensitized that you don't even feel anything anymore when you hear a bird singing that it wants some fuck.

Anyone got that comic about making up a strawman to make a point and then turning around and the strawman is standing there

Thanks