ZOEEYY I LOVE ZOEEY
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almost home
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@princessparadoxical
ZOEEYY I LOVE ZOEEY

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im so sorry that you're doomed by the narrative but i really need you to answer my message on Microsoft Teams
The older i get the more i understand why some people become obsessed with privacy, not because theyβre hiding something, but because being constantly perceived starts to feel spiritually exhausting.

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Anthony Machuca, Wake up Steve, our bowls are empty
a while ago I read an omegaverse fic where part of the premise was that the guy had like, abnormally long and intense heats, which as you can imagine was used for horny reasons. but it was a fairly grounded omegaverse setting as far as it goes, and I could not stop thinking "he has pornworld endometriosis and needs to see an Ξ©BGYN"
are non brits aware of count binface.
I have just combined all rice in the world into a single rouse
Sneebert Deebert

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hyper beam
I also have Hyper Beam Sylveon! I have a recording saved because the animation made me laugh.
Taylor Swift, My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys
itβs weird that professional letters are supposed to start with βdear.β i donβt even call my mom that
my darling hiring manager. my springtime rose. if hired i will bring a strong work ethic to this position
βIf youβre not the beautiful one, the quick-witted one, or the ones that are good at games and full of youthful energy, then who are you? And what can you do if youβre the odd one out? Is it possible youβll ever find a way to fit in?β
this one goes out to anyone who has ever escaped to a staircase when the party got to be too overwhelming
Thinking about the Holmes story where a blind girl goes to him and is like "My fiancΓ© is missing and he kept telling me the week leading up to his disappearance that he would always love me and come back for me,were anything to happen so I think he knew he was in trouble and I love him so much and I'm going to wait for him but I'd like to find him faster,ya know?" And Holmes figures out that it was this girl's parents to scam her out of money she was owed from an estate which she gave to them because she was still living at home,which she wouldn't be if she ever married,so her step father PRETENDED TO DATE HER for MONTHS to keep her from ever getting engaged to a real person and when Holmes finds out he confronts this man and this man is like "Well,you caught me! But it wasn't illegal:) so:)" and Holmes is like "No,but it was sickening and cruel and if she had a brother or good male friend he should post you up and whip you but she doesn't." And the man is like "No,she doesn't." And does the Victorian version of sticking his tongue out and Holmes is like "Well,I guess I'll do then!" And HE PULLS OUT HIS HUNTING WHIP.
Holmes really went:
This is what we mean when we say everyone should support people with disabilities
Be the Sherlock Holmes chasing domestic abusers with a riding crop that you wish to see in the world.
He doesn't have to chase them.
Watson will hold the guy in a headlock for however long he needs to;)
For those of you wondering, the story is A Case of Identity, collected in The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes which can be read for free on Project Gutenberg.
The horse-whip quote in question
βIt may be so, or it may not, Mr. Holmes,β said he, βbut if you are so very sharp you ought to be sharp enough to know that it is you who are breaking the law now, and not me. I have done nothing actionable from the first, but as long as you keep that door locked you lay yourself open to an action for assault and illegal constraint.β
βThe law cannot, as you say, touch you,β said Holmes, unlocking and throwing open the door, βyet there never was a man who deserved punishment more. If the young lady has a brother or a friend, he ought to lay a whip across your shoulders. By Jove!β he continued, flushing up at the sight of the bitter sneer upon the manβs face, βit is not part of my duties to my client, but hereβs a hunting crop handy, and I think I shall just treat myself toββ He took two swift steps to the whip, but before he could grasp it there was a wild clatter of steps upon the stairs, the heavy hall door banged, and from the window we could see Mr. James Windibank running at the top of his speed down the road"

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The conversation I think Scratch and Caine were having in Ep 8 [from Genesis 4:9-4:10]